We recently connected with John Daugherty and have shared our conversation below.
John, thanks for joining us, excited to have you contributing your stories and insights. Let’s kick things off with your mission – what is it and what’s the story behind why it’s your mission?
Good or bad I create it all. Much of it is out of fear because much of what I was taught by school, society, friends, even my parents, even out of love, was based on fear mostly. I formed those unconscious habits to protect me because that is what our unconscious mind is there to do, survive. Much of my life I spent trying to play catch up to the fears I created in my own head in how life is, and how it is supposed to be, and how I fit into all of this out of reaction to what was going on, not creating the life I wanted and loved. Emotions are the guiding post of where I am in the path of what I want to create in my life. I spent much of my life either hiding from my emotions with alcohol or other things, or using things out of my control and power to gauge where I was at in life such as other people, places, and things that I had no control over and would certainly change over time. I had no structure to find the path to what I wanted in life, always playing catch up to what I thought I needed to do to please others, or rules and beliefs I made in my own mind to such an extent I lost focus on the things that I really loved to do, and in loving myself. I also neglected the ones I loved most at those times as well, thinking the money or the trophies or the stuff could replace just being present and there.
By staying in that constant loop of trying to catch up to made up rules and goals in my own head I had no space in their left for anybody else, especially myself.
I can tell an almost endless story from being deaf in one ear at age 2, losing my front teeth to a line drive baseball in 7th grade, moving all over the country. 2 daughters by age 20 and just a junior in college to much success at work, followed by a second wife and third daughter that took the same cycle of my first relationship in a quicker fashion. At work was much sales success followed by sales failures and big time near misses. I had to create the right structure to get the right end result from where I was at to where I wanted to be.
I find many of us getting lost or stuck or overwhelmed by things out of our control or wasting time chasing shiny objects that do not really serve our true end results and I want to share that structure and way to pivot beliefs and identities with others so they can break out of the matrix of their own mind and become the creator of the life they love. I cannot keep what I do not give away and I do not really know something until I can teach it to others.
John, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?
I spent many years in the self improvement world trying to find my way to a better life, just like many others. Right out of college with 2 girls and my first job I was doing Amway and trying to create more in everything I did. I bought Tony Robbins on cassette tape, had Bob Proctor courses. Over my years in sales did many different sales trainings. Attended Zig Ziglar events. So many had all of the right information for me, they just did not have the structure I needed to make it work for me.
I have won many trophies in sales, Presidents Clubs in many telecom companies, have done many wonderful things and have been on many wonderful trips. None of them did I do for the experience itself, but for what I thought it would get me outside of that feeling. Everything we do is for how it makes us feel, and we have been trained into believing that is being selfish. You have nothing to give anyone else if you do not feel good and fulfilled first. That should be your primary goal, then everything else will be taken care of. Because I had no understanding of my emotions, I would allow them to go over the other side of confidence and create cockiness in my self to the point of self sabotaging everything I had built up to that point.
Relationships, finances, and health, all of them I put at risk or lost through my behavior and I ended up in a loop of self destruction each time. As my ill feelings towards myself regarding my actions without proper intentions escalated, so did my destructive behaviors of drinking or whatever to cover those emotions. Once I overcame the addictions that further fueled those self destructive loops with some help, that which I asked for many years after being run over by a car in 2010 in downtown Jacksonville, dying 3 times between my revival on the street to my stay in Shand’s Hospital with my heart stopping 2 more times on two more days in ICU, getting my last rights given to me by a priest, only to have my first surgery the next day and spending the next 12 weeks in a coma.
After coming too at Brooks Rehab Hospital and spending a few months in cognitive and physical rehab, I checked out early against medical advice to go back to the world of sales as my ego instructed me. I won Summit of Leaders for top sales in the company I worked with and made lots of money but was truly a miserable person inside. I was using things outside of myself or other people, places, things, trophies, money, you name it to take the place of the true person I was.
With all of the wisdom I had been given before, no one had given me the structure I understood to create the life I love, be the predominant creative force in my life, and live my true nature and purpose with health and vitality each day as using the Lenses structure we teach here and recoding the limiting beliefs that keep me from being the person I truly am.
We’d love to hear a story of resilience from your journey.
I believe I expanded on that in the previous slide but I spent more than two decades performing well in sales but doing that at the cost of my family and relationships and health. I have been deaf in my left ear since 2 causing many learning difficulties growing up. Lost my front teeth in middle school causing much embarrassment. Had children at a young age and really did much of that trying to play catch up to being run over by a car, dying 3 times, now back to almost college weight of 205 from being 258 lbs in 2015 when I decided to get sober more than 5 years getting run over by a car pretty drunk. I now spend good time with my 3 daughters, 8 grandchildren and the rest of my pretty large family.
Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?
I had to unlearn much of my limiting beliefs that were designed to protect me at a younger age from the beliefs each of us make in our early years of trying to figure out how it is in the world with ourselves, the ones we love, and others in this world. Society, our friends and school have taught us many things sometimes out of fear or trying to protect us, out of love they believe, but really limiting us in our ability to understand. 
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Image Credits
Christopher M Duncan is the red head and my mentor for Magnetic Mind Coaching and is the creator of the Superconscious Recode process as well as the Lenses Focus technique. All of the people in the group video are other Certified Magnetic Mind Coaches from around the world and I have their permission to include them.