Popular reviews

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  Review by Patrick Willems ★★★ 11

  There's clearly another cut that's an hour longer and I would like to see it

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  Review by David Sims ★★½ 1

  ugh typical Hollywood, always trying to make everything into a stealth Beowulf movie

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  Review by Obistrike ★★★★ 4

  There's not a long wrong with this movie. A simple men on a mission story, Antonio Banderas at the height of his seductive charms, a gruff bunch of bearded character actors, CGI free violence, real sets and a lot of swords, shields, horses, rain, smoke, fire and fog. McTiernan knows how to get things done.

  I’ll admit, I'm predisposed to the genre and The 13th Warrior brims with my kind of mythology and mysticism…bear-suits and beheading. Always a comforting watch, like meeting an old friend or enjoying a glass of Baileys and ice-cream.

  A forgotten classic? You better believe it buddy.

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  Review by matt lynch ★★★½ 2

  This looks fantastic, too bad there's no really good transfer of it out there. McTiernan remains a master of spatial clarity even in pitch darkness or in pea-soup fog, although not in the way you might think. His characters are as disoriented as we are but firelight and silhouette are constantly used as landmarks, not locating us inside a space but opening or closing the immediate space around us. Famously this was taken away from him but much like Woo with MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE 2 the eye here is a singular one even if the scissors belonged to someone else. Bit of a shame this isn't closer to the "Forensic Beowulf" of Crichton's novel but that's neither here nor there.

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  Review by Andy Summers 🤠 ★★★

  When a film loses in excess of $100 million dollars you would expect it to be shit. John McTiernan's The 13th Warrior lost that amount with a spiraling budget and a lackluster showing at the box office. But was the film really that bad, or was it simply a case of the inflated budget and some poor initial reviews scuppering any chance it had?
  Based loosely on the Michael Crichton novel Eaters Of The Dead, with a few nods in the direction of some Norse legends, this historical action film does have some fine moments of battlefield carnage. Brutal and bloody, but with the odd comic touch thrown into the mix, this sees Arab poet (?) Antonio Banderas accompany Norsemen…

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  Review by HKFanatic ★★★★ 2

  Almost painful because you can tell there's a 5-star film in here somewhere, if only control hadn't been wrested from John MicTiernan—"The 13th Warrior" feels clearly compromised (the final battle lasts all of five minutes and I don't think there's a single shot of Antonio Banderas fighting during it!), but the hacked runtime does mean this thing moves fast, mercilessly fast, and there's still so much here I enjoy. The major sequences are simply awash in atmosphere: the dense fog, flaming torches, and heads cleaved clean off their bodies, it's like a portrait of hell in motion. Hadn't seen this since it was new on VHS(!) and it's aged far better than I would have expected; you can definitely see traces of DNA for Jackson's "Lord of the Rings" trilogy and "Game of Thrones" here. McTiernan was one of the greats.

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  Review by Deckk ★★ 2

  100-word review: The 13th Warrior is somewhat shallow work of historical fiction that prioritises spectacle over substance. The film is primarily concerned with battle scenes, which are well-staged but dominate the screen time, leaving little room for character development, making it hard for viewers to care about the outcome of said battles. The supporting cast of Viking warriors is largely indistinguishable from one another, and Ibn Fahdlan's transformation from outsider to warrior feels rushed and under explored. The story lacks depth, with much of the plot driven by a series of encounters with a shadowy enemy rather than a compelling narrative arc.

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  Review by comrade_yui ★★★

  half of this is an absolutely wonderful modernist kingdom of heaven-esque viking epic with john mctiernan's exquisite eye for sequence and detail (and lots of gore!), and the other half is michael crichton directing this shit like it was made in 1974 with shitty zooms and flat compositions. despite my love and admiration for jerry goldsmith as a composer, his score here is gloriously swashbuckling and unfitting for this type of gritty story, an obvious attempt to glam-up all these big medieval dudes throwing each other around in the mud. graeme revel & lisa gerrard's rejected score fits much better with the 13th warrior's misty atmosphere than goldsmith's hollywood bombast.

  it's this type of movie that pisses me off the most…

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  Review by 19oldboy91 ★★★★ 25

  English Version below🟠🟢🔵

  
  DuBFaL Film Nr.27 - Der 13te Krieger 1999 Kategorie: Mittelalter Vorgabe & Auswahl: deMicha Vorschlag: drwar5ong

  
  „Hwem blir den trettende (mannen)?!“

  Sprachen die Dubfal-Jungs und die Reise begann jenseits des Jahrtausends in den Gefilden der 90er rüden Wortstammes mit dem freien Zungenbein zu den heiligen Hallen der Kultfilme und den Klassikern. Zu den Abgekehrten Autos hochgestiegen auf die Rücken der Pferde vom kräftigen Nordpferd zu dem edlen wie wilden Araberhengst. Gestrichen das bekannte Hollywood-Gesicht zum Haufen neuer Noten kalten Herzens. Die Note aufgreifend des Kontrastes eines spanischen Arabers mit dem Banderas Antonio. Befreit das Bild an den Traufen lästig hängender CGI-Tröpfen im Niederreißen der blauen und grünen Wände. Gezückt im Beiseitelegen der Feuerwaffen des geschwungenen Schwertes abgetrennter Gliedmaßen…

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  Review by Will Patton 𓅪 ★★★½

  Beowulf in Boots. 

  What a cool little film The 13th Warrior is, albeit feeling like it contains something even larger and even longer somewhere within it. Reminiscent of Seven Samurai/Kingdom of Heaven, with a pretty solid story and some nice sets, costumes and weaponry. The action is strong, the score is decent, and it’s not hard to root for Antonio Banderas as a badass swordsman. Leaves the question of “what could have been?”, but what is, is pretty solid.

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  Review by 19oldboy91 ★★★★ 63

  English Version below

  
  „Hvem skal bli den første (mannen)?!“

  Fragte das Kino im Jahre Domine 1999 die vom Haare bärtige Wangen wie das nackte jungfreundliche bevorstehenden Jahrzehntes.

  
  „Hvem blir den andre (mannen)?!“

  Erscholl es wiederholte male ihres Echos abprallender mit der Gischt des Lichtermeeres gesprenkelten Häuserwänden.

  
  „Hvem blir den tredje (mannen)?!“

  Strömten schnell versiegende Flussläufe in die am Feuer gezeichneten Schattenspiele.

  
  „Hvem blir den fjerde (mannen)?!“

  Senkte sich die Waage des Gleichnisses zum Verluste ihrer.

  
  „Hvem blir den femte (mannen)?!“

  Erhoben sich die Mächte hoch oben zu den Thronen Walhallas verprassenden Goldes.

  
  „Hvem blir den sjette (mannen)?!“

  Setzte ich mich an die Seite meines Stammvaters erster Generation.

  
  „Hvem blir den syvende (mannen)?!“

  Vernahm ich fremde Sprache aus dem Norden reisend…

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  Review by JBird ★★★

  Banderas is number 13,
  Sent to go after a queen.
  He'll look and stare,
  At a half-bear,
  Unsure of what he's just seen.