Welcome to The Cheater’s Guide to Thanksgiving. While there are plenty of tips out there for folks making scratch desserts and artisan loaves, the Cheater’s Guide focuses on the person who could use a helping hand—even from some unconventional sources. Some might call it “cheating” (like that’s a bad thing), but there’s nothing wrong with using modern technology and supermarket know-how to help you make a bangin’ traditional feast—with much less of the traditional work.
Whether you like it or not, Thanksgiving is a popular time to lie to your family. Whether it’s a good-spirited “no presents this year,” or passing around slices of the “healthy” cheesecake, I know you have your reasons. Here's one for your annoying pastry chef cousin: “I made the crust myself.” Here’s how to manipulate a store bought pie crust so you can make food your way, and avoid another year of that "scratch-made is best" conversation.
The easiest pie crust
A store-bought pie crust is a great way to lighten the load on baking days, and a near necessity for folks who struggle with pastry. The primary goal is to get rid of the obvious store-bought look and find the best tasting pie shell. There are many big name brands out there, and a handful of them are pretty terrible. Luckily, I did the hard work for you and tested out some store-bought pie shells that taste good and bake up nicely.
Naturally, you could choose one that is already rolled flat so you can fit it into your pie dish and proceed to Step 2. But, if you only have pre-fitted frozen shells to choose from, all hope is not lost. Pick one that is fitted to a 9-inch aluminum deep dish pan. Then:
1. Switch out the aluminum pan
Once you’ve brought home your deep dish pie shell, put it in the freezer for 10-20 minutes. It needs to be pretty firm for this next part. The aluminum pie pan means you don’t have to roll out pastry, but it’s a dead give away for store-bought. Once the crust is firm, loosen the edges and begin to peel away the aluminum dish. The edges are stamped, so that’s usually the annoying part, but once you’ve freed them, the rest of the dish pops right off. Place the naked crust into your glass, ceramic, or metal pie dish of equal (or close to equal) size.
2. Re-crimp the edge in a “rustic” way
Leave the pie shell at room temperature, or in a slightly warm place, for about 30 minutes to warm it up. (I left mine in the above-stove microwave and turned the stove light on, because it gets pretty toasty in there.)
Once your crust has warmed up enough to be soft and malleable, make sure it is fitted into the pan all the way around; press the pastry with your fingertips from the center moving outward, essentially stretching the dough out to close up any gaps. Now there’s only one thing left to do: Get rid of that machine-crimped edge.
Smash the edge of the pie crust with your fingers to flatten out any design that was there from the factory. This will also warm up the fats in the crust to make it more pliable. Once you’ve erased their marks, make your own. Might I suggest the old-fashioned way?
The easiest, fastest, and I think the homiest, way is to press all around with the tines of a fork. You could also crimp it with your fingers like in the picture above. Press the crust into the wedge-space of the thumb and pointer on your other hand. Don’t strive to be perfect; a little inconsistency will make it look even more homemade. Fill and bake as intended, or chill in the freezer for future use. When your cousin asks you what recipe you used, just say you got it from Lifehacker.
