Autism and Challenging Behaviour 4 – Eating and getting the right foods

Autism and diet

Autism and diet

This differs slightly from my usual blog post about autism and challenging behaviour.  The previous posts have enabled me to share at least some partial success with our son overcoming some of the behavioural issues related to autism But with this blog I’m looking for help.

Yours if possible.

Okay, what is the problem?  Well our son John has a rather limited diet.  Now it is not unhealthy but it is very limited.

And when I say limited I really do mean limited.  He will eat strawberries, apples, bananas and pears as far as fruit goes.  For vegetables he will only eat carrots, broccoli, cauliflower and potatoes.  Protein is chicken nuggets, fish fingers, lentils, sausages, smoked mackerel and baked beans.  Oh and the occasional cheese sandwich.  He will eat white rice and some bread as well as occasionally cakes.

He thinks he likes pizza – but not in practice.

While he is happy to eat more than one thing at a time he likes them on different parts of the plate.

Hands, of course, are infinitely preferable to a knife and fork.

Both my wife and I would rather like John to widen his eating palate.  Indeed my wife has tried to introduce new foods to which the official reaction is “Yuck”!

That being said we are told that he is happy to eat meals at school.  So it could be a question of set and setting.

So this, then, is the point of this blog.  We would love your advice!  Can you tell us how you managed to help you child (or yourself) develop wider eating habits.  In particular we are interested in some of the following questions:-

1)    How did you get your child to eat different foodstuff?  What techniques did you use?  What worked and what didn’t?

2)   How did you teach your child table manners?

3)   Are you concerned about the nutrient value or your child’s diet?  Have you been to a dietician?

4)   Can you go you restaurants with your child?  Do you need an iPad?  We do.

5)   What about food at school?

Please feel free to add anything else you think may be of use to my wife and me using the comments box below.

Thanks very much in advance

PS  John does go to fast food joints but won’t eat the burgers.  And he hates ketchup.

PPS My mother tells me he was once spotted eating an Orange.

Here are some of the tips we were given by our readers.

I wish my 21 yr old son with aspergers ate half of what your child does any tips would be appreciated. As his diet is 3-4 items the only veg is in form of a chip

Hi! 26 yo autistic. I don’t see any problem with how your child eats. I’m still like that and I’m perfectly healthy. The only thing that may have to be changed is the hands instead of fork and knife thing.
1) How did you get your child to eat different foodstuff? What techniques did you use? What worked and what didn’t?
My parents have told me that, when I was 3, I would eat lentils only. They gave me some supplement to increase my appetite and that started to change.
2) How did you teach your child table manners?
I don’t remember how they taught me, but I do remember asking them to give me the food when I was 4, because I got bored of eating by myself.
3) Are you concerned about the nutrient value or your child’s diet? Have you been to a dietician?
My mother gives me a variety of food so that I eat a little bit of everything.
4) Can you go to restaurants with your child? Do you need an iPad? We do.
I used to cry a lot at restaurants and there weren’t iPads or tablets at the time. They didn’t refuse to bring me there, anyway.
5) What about food at school?
I couldn’t eat at school until I was 7 as, before that, I hated the food and used to cry a lot. Then, I started to tolerate the school food, and I liked some things even better than home-made food.
Don’t worry. Your kid will be fine!!

Your sons diet is WAY better than our kids, we are in fact working towards a diet like his. I’ve come to understand that this is because our wee man has fairly profound sensory integration issues & new tastes are akin to something like an electric shock of revulsion – making widening his pallet very challenging indeed. Thus I have no advice, the only thing we’ve found that helps is allowing him to ‘experiment’ with food. ‘Experimenting’ in this context is touching, smelling, discussing items on a plate with no expectation that he actually eat them. He usually does this with an occupational therapist and we follow up with repeated exposure. This is an extremely SLOW process. We tried every other conceivable thing we (+ a team of specialists could think of) so naturally we will be following your blog with interest !

You have got to find his carrot so to speak. My son has a severely limited pallet eating a toaster streudel and pediasure for breakfast chicken nuggets for lunch and almost always cereal unless we have cheese pizza. He eats no meats with the exception of chicken nuggets and they cannot be homemade or chicken strips! The thing about it is… We set a goal of 5 new foods to try each week. Generally this is a meat or fruit or vegetable since I feel these are most important. I give him something to work towards such as 1new pokemon card or a trip to the pool. However we have been doing this for months and is somewhat time consuming to really push him to take the 1 bite he has discovered he likes watermelon… But all seeds have to be cut out. This is a win in my book since he wasn’t eating any fruits or vegetables and no real meat… Just processed chicken nuggets. He gags on almost everything and literally cries but i feel it is worth it. Good luck

I hear ya on everything! My son peels fish fingers because he doesn’t like the texture of crumb, but he’ll eat the crumb off schnitzel, as long as he eats the meat of the schnitzel separately. He’ll eat chicken nuggets, but only 1 brand. He’ll eat hot chips, but only straight cut, and they have to be crunchy on the outside and mushy inside like mashed potato, but he won’t eat mashed potato. I too am tired and I 100% agree that life is too short to argue over food. We keep putting new and old foods previously refused on his plate and he is slowly widening his food choices. He’ll eat bananas for fruit, and quite a few meats now and the struggle continues. He’s growing well so I’m ok with it.

Eating at home was always at the family table, not on the sofa or in front of a computer.  We treated it as a social event too, so no TV or radio on in the kitchen whilst eating.  The table would be set out with the tablecloth, dinner mats, teacups, knife, fork and spoons, bread and butter in the middle, and the tea tray at the side with a teapot, little jug of milk, a sugar bowl, salt, pepper, vinegar, and sauces.  It would be a ritual with warmed plates brought to us with the meat already on it and the veggies then served hot from the pans.  My mother would then serve the veggies as we were all sat down and we waited until everyone’s plates were ready before digging in.  If I refused to eat any of the veggies she wouldn’t serve them me anymore nor would she ask if I wanted them.  She left me to ask why I didn’t get any and told me that it was because I didn’t like it, to which my response usually would be “yes I do” and then she’d offer me some of hers and watch me eat it before taking some more off the pan for herself and then asked if I wanted more.  The rest of the ritual before eating involved passing of items from the tea tray around the table rather than grabbing it ourselves by asking “could you pass the salt please?” so we were socially interactive (I had to ask with the word “please” at the end or I’d get eyeballed and asked what else I was to say.)  We were expected also to have manners around the table which involved elbows off the table, no chewing with your mouth open, no talking with your mouth full, and to use the knife to cut food rather than waving a big piece on a fork.  If you had to spit something out for some reason (bones, fat) then my mother would fetch a roll of kitchen towels.  This eating ritual was also practiced at my great aunt and uncle’s house and at my aunt’s house so it became the norm for me.  Only thing I didn’t like was being told I’d get no pudding if I didn’t eat all my dinner, but when you’re full you’re full so it wouldn’t have made any difference if I ate all my dinner or not I’d still get no pudding.

amyshine79 Check out the awesome products from “Make Eating Fun!” Their unique and fun interactive nutritional games/stories can help! The product line offers exciting food adventures for children and their families to enjoy and have fun with together!  http://www.makeeatingfun.com/ Here’s also short video which explains a bit about the system.. https://youtu.be/2uQ5rVLS1nU

SarahEmeryBradley My stepson is 6 and when he and his father moved into my house he was eating a waffle with strawberry jelly for breakfast and dinner and pb&j for lunch every day. He would eat apple banana or orange and loved strawberry yogurt (no lumps). After two years with him he is now completely off jelly waffles at our house. He has cereal in the mornings, still his pb&j for lunch and for supper, high protein mac & cheese with cauliflower, broccoli, carrots, and green beans. He’ll also eat raw celery and cucumber. Last weekend he ate haddock! I put cheese and Ritz crackers on it and called it cheesy Ritz (the word fish would have sent him gagging). The trick for me was a special cafeteria plate with compartments, and sooooo much patience. Each of these new foods took at least two hours of sitting with him and playing games, for him to even nibble them. We’d touch them, smell them, kiss them. Pretend to brush our teeth with them, put them on our heads, he would feed them to me, anything silly thing I could think of. Each step received praise, clapping, dancing, anything that kept him smiling. I also tried a rewards system with small dollar toys wrapped like birthday presents. After eating a new food he was allowed to choose from the birthday basket that was kept on the table during the meal. He’s doing so great now, we’re so proud. Unfortunately he won’t do the same for his mother at her house and all of us together in one house greatly upsets him. So, we’re all still working on that. Go team!

Gabby Forster My son is 11 and is in the 1/10th percentile for his height/ weight ratio. His diet is appauling!! He’s getting more fussy as he gets older, not better. It really concerns me. He is extremely intelligent, hates sport and never gets sick. He eats NO fruit or veges. The only meat he eats is bbq’d chicken. His diet consists of noodles and nuggets. He hates sweet things, and only eats savoury snacks, like chips. I have had him to a paediatrician who has now put him a multi vitamin and an iron tablet, as well as a daily drink of sustagen. He refuses any new food, and gags on anything that has texture. He also claims he can smell ants.

CorineSterling
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174.64.123.242
millndollrbaby  My son is the same way and he is 6 now. He won’t eat fruits or veggies either and he loves cheese! He as well only eats Pizza, chicken nuggets, cheesburgers, corn dogs, hot dogs, mac n cheese and really nothing else. Also, no pepper or anything green.

CorineSterling
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174.64.123.242
My son has a very limited diet. He won’t eat any vegetables, and only a banana for fruit. He doesn’t like rice, grits, beans or nuts. I have no idea why he won’t even try these foods, once their in his mouth he acts like he is going to throw up and refuses to eat them. Also change is a BIG problem for my son he hates change in anything.

momx32b1g
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70.198.2.17
We introduce one new food a week if his choice.. we haven’t widened it to where I’d like BUT we have discovered a love for CRAFT Mac n cheese no shells or we have melt downs but it’s a start we have discovered a sever gagging over noodles with sauce..but noodles with a little butter and only thin spaghetti… and to think he only suffers sever adhd/borderline ASD I learned if I force it he will automatically hate it, as well as pizza with no topping and only thin crust, he won’t hardly easy at school we get the menu and circle ask the days we need to pack lunches:( but he will occasionally try new foods at school but not often, he loves to cook but won’t eat any of it… I even tried switching his choice brand of corn dogs while he was at school..one bite he gagged.. I ended up telling him bc it almost eliminated his love for corn dogs in the spot.. we still 2 years in try a new food a week even if he tried it mo ago… sometimes it changes depending on his mood as Well

amybomb
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101.170.213.82
Ok…..my son wont eat anything wet, flat, square or sticky….I havent still after 8 years quite mastered what is wet…..apparently all fruit and veg is wet, meat fish and chicken is wet unless coated in panko crumb, and deep fried. No foods may be mixed together or joined, except recently with hotdogs…..which he refused to call hotdogs…..they are red sauages in soft rolls(with wet bbq sauce, which I would think is wet but isnt to him). Regular bread is out as ots flat and square but if its cut in a shape and toasted its ok. Soup, pasta, any one pot meal really is out as the foods are mixed. I have tried to use mashed veg as the glue to stick the bread crumbs on chicken and meat and was just given a sigh…..and a look like “really mum? You thought you could get that by me?” ……no mince as its wet, even when in meatball form….but he will eat a meat pie too….which I have also tried to add pureed veg to, much to his chagrin. I give up….! He just takes a multivitamin in his hot cocoa now…..im tired and life is too short to argue over food. 🙂 good luck.

FrancesSarver
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50.140.210.172
It’s really good that she doesn’t eat the ranch dressing, it’s processed, so lots of chemicals and preservatives in it. Whole foods are best, if she will eat them. 🙂

CherylMahoney
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66.87.91.46
Your son eats more types of food than mine on a good day. Phil doesn’t care for the texture of meat so we bribe him a lot to get him to eat a small amount. He loves cheese though so we keep several types of it in the house. He loves a wide variety of fruit and veggies. New foods are a challenge, he usually refuses to try them. Up till last year table manners where really bad but at least now he eats with silver wear not his fingers. Although, finger foods are his favorite things to eat still. School food is hit and miss most of it stays on his tray, but a relative of ours works at school and she has been working with him to get him to eat. Restaurant eating can be very interesting it matters who is eating with us on if he behaves. IPad or my droid phone helps when he done eating but I’m not. I do have a rule that I make him follow with food he has to try a bite if it’s a new food or something he hasn’t eaten in awhile, you never know you might like it.

Sue1968
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180.181.122.196
Hi JeffreyMensch, we eat at the dinner table as a family. Perhaps you could just let everyone know what your wishes are. Tell them that you’d like to have everyone eat at the table. If they complain about not being able to eat at the computers, tell them they can go on them after tea if they come to the table to eat. I’d also try to get them to go with no computers after tea eventually. Let them on the computers til tea time, but not after tea…this is what we do. Good luck and thanks
Sue

JeffreyMensch
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50.15.187.63
4Cards  The Ipad is a great tool…just costly…but i have had great success with the leapster and hope to be introducing the pads in the near future…they really do help control behavior…

JeffreyMensch
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50.15.187.63
CindyWismer  I think this one is key…they really can move under their own power…

JeffreyMensch
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50.15.187.63
Sue1968  This has been one our primary fights here at our house….how do I get the whole family around the table for dinner?…Mother and I seperate ourselves as much as possible but we simply cannot be everywhere at once…when its just the two of us and the kids we tend to eat at our own “stations”…each person in this house has their own computer…their own spot…It hurts me though that it has come to that…My kids do adapt fast though…we recently started to re-introduce the family table into the family equation…somewhere along the line we lost that…I would like to cook more as i do have ideas…I just keep trying to roll with it all myself…I hope we both find success in the future…:-)

Sue1968
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180.181.123.203
I wish my child wound eat the variety of foods you mention. Her diet consists of sausage and a tiny amount of potato and she still doesn’t eat it all, that’s her dinner. She has a sandwich and choc chip cookies for lunch at school. Fruit is an apple. The only fruit she’ll eat. Breakfast is Nutella on toast or bread, if we have none of that, she’ll eat Vegemite. She drinks nesquik or water. I hope I haven’t offended you. My daughters palette is very limited and I’d like to know how to expand it too
Sue

SaraCaldwell
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138.87.187.218
The
school thing is interesting, your comment about environment. What dish
soap are you using, how well do you rinse? What does the school use? I
can’t easily eat at certain restaurants because I can taste the
cleaning chemicals in the food very intensely
(I’ve had other people try the exact same foods, and they can’t taste
it, whereas I feel like there should be bubbles coming from my mouth,
the bleach taste/smell is so strong). People’s homes, not so bad,
however the soapy taste is more noticeable when they use a dishwasher
rather than hand wash their dishes.
Also,
certain foods just flat out make me feel full after a few bites. This
is particularly true of refried beans dishes and in fact most Mexican
carb and protein dishes. The rice is almost as filling as the beans.
It tastes wonderful at first, and then the switch is flipped and I feel
nauseatingly full. Makes me wonder if that’s where the pizza response
is coming from. I love the taste and first few bites of most Mexican
food, but the more traditional (well, Americanized restaurant
“traditional”) it is, the worse the “filling” effect is, and the sooner I
get nauseous. Note that rice cooked for East Asian recipes doesn’t have
this effect at all, and it usually doesn’t for Italian recipes.

SaraCaldwell
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138.87.187.218
John
actually appears to like the same number of foods as most kids. Just
not the usual, or most convenient ones. Age isn’t given here, or I
missed it, but if he’s young, yeah, most young kids separate their food
out, too.
Is his preference for raw or cooked? Texture issues?
For
me, if I ate a food one time, and then tried it at a later time and it
tasted different, I couldn’t stand it. At times, I took for granted
that a different taste for the same food meant that it had gone bad, and
I would occasionally cry and panic, assuming that everyone was
poisoning themselves (sidenote, as an adult, since they moved away from
transfats and started cooking potato chips in sunflower oil, I cannot
eat them anymore in any quantity, it smells like they’ve gone bad and
tastes worse. Those still fixed in peanut oil are fine, sensory if not
healthwise).
As
an adult, I can taste the difference between different types of apples,
different types of oranges, and different batches of the same variety.
I hate wax on apples–the eating isn’t an issue, but no amount of soap
gets the residue off my fingers.
Large
bites were overwhelming. Small, tolerable (I still can’t eat whole
Brussels sprouts without triggering my gag reflex no matter how they’re
prepared. But diced finely and lightly fried in butter, they’re a
favorite food).
Smell.
Don’t get me started on onions that are slightly too old, or grease
that’s the tiniest bit off. They don’t burn, they feel like someone
punched the inside of my nose, and the physical sensation is what leads
to a gag reflex. Fresh onions are fine.
As
for issues with wheat or dairy….I’d actually get that checked out by a
doctor…it could well be good instinct on the part of your son. I’m
not on the bandwagon that says that gluten or dairy are THE cause of
autism, there is no ONE magic bullet cause, but I do think that they can
negatively affect some kids. As someone with a gluten and dairy
intolerance, whose behavior is affected, and who suffers physical side
effects, I think it’s always a worthwhile point of inquiry.
Sidenote:
If he gets chronic ear infections, definitely check the dairy. I did
as a kid, but they went away when we figured out the dairy issue. That
was process of elimination, it was sensitivity rather than allergy, but
made a huge difference. Chronic bronchitis every winter, and half the
time during the summer, ear infections, ruptured eardrum at one
point….then cut out the milk, it all went away. I don’t avoid milk
and dairy altogether, but if I have too much, I can tell, the inside of
my ears (as in, inner ear, inside the ear canal itself, close to the
throat) start itching and burning, and triggering my gag reflex a
little.

LorreaDuffin
[email protected]
173.66.8.180
My son has ASD.  After him having so many sleeping problems every night, we switched his milk to lactose free and he slept a lot better and no more waking up.  He loves chicken and pizza and really any meat!!  Veggies are difficult to get him to eat except for broccoli and corn.  He doesn’t like side dishes(potatoes, stuffing, mac & Cheese)

EmilieBrosseau
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24.225.239.10
Hi,
My three older sons (ages 6-4-2) have ASD
1. Really tuff to introduce new food. We didn’t succeed yet, but I’m starting to think about recipes for hidding good food. If it passes the test on my three little lab rats, I share my findings with you 🙂
2. Using ustensils is the only good manner we insist on and even if we try to make them use them, eventually, they took them when they were ready.
3. if you are concerned, you can always complement him diet with Pediacare beverage. Insure peace of mind for us parents and it’s easy to make them take it ’cause it taste like cake 🙂
4.No, we don’t, but we do a lot of take out.
But the Ipad is awfully useful for visits to the doctors office.
5.for what they refuse to eat at lunchtime, they make out at snacktime.
ps: Antoine loves mc donald’s but only eats fries.
pps: I suggest you let your oranges on your kitchen counter for a while…. you never know, maybe it will encourage him to eat some more!
ppps: maybe he does love pizza. but if he have a hard time with food touching on his plate, imagine stacked food!…if you give him a plate with cheese, sauce and cooked dough, all apart, maybe he would eat pizza that way.

CindyWismer
[email protected]
96.251.186.174
It sounds like he is doing OK with his limited diet.  Maybe you could get him to chew a gummy vitamin.  It will have to be his decision, but he will try more foods as he gets older.  My nephew went to camp and was so hungry he finally decided to taste something else- his decision.  Good luck

CindyWismer
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96.251.186.174
It sounds like he is doing OK with his limited diet.  Maybe he could chew a gummy vitamin.  Maybe a bribe like $1 a bite (or teeny tiny taste) will work. He will try new things as he gets older.  My nephew was very picky, as I was, until he went to camp and was so hungry he finally tasted other foods.  It was his choice, and he discovered it wasn’t so bad.

millndollrbaby
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98.166.65.47
My son has never eaten a fruit or vegetable. He loves dairy of all kinds.Specially cheese, He could eat a whole block if your not watching him. I am so sick of eating pizza, tacos, chicken nuggetts and cheeseburgers. That is it. God forbid if there is a spice like a speck of pepper..Or worse a grill mark on it.. He is 14 now. I do hope  his tastes will expand… But he is healthy and almost 5’10”. That is one big block of cheese!

JaneNicholas
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49.197.31.218
Oh we love restaurants. The power of being in charge!!!!! But we need steak, spag bol or chicken/ rice his way or FORGET IT!!!!

JaneNicholas
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49.197.31.218
Are you spying into my home lol. This is my house to a T!! I am convincing myself the modelling of good food habits will end up having an impact. In the meantime the same foods get a regular roll out.

brendaenglish51
[email protected]
176.26.12.219
We call EVERYTHING new Dinosaur ———! As in Oh Hannah would you like Dinosaur Nuggets or Dinosaur Fingers? (Chicken Nuggets or Fish Fingers) Works best if you do a dinosaur roar after the quesstion LOL!

PradaSofia
[email protected]
65.94.239.113
My son is 2 y old and he likes soup, so I blend meat, vegetables and cereals together and freeze a bowl of soup for each day of the week. I send it to the daycare so he can have a happy lunch. That way I make sure he eats healthy at least one time a day. He likes grapes, bananas, bread and water. These are his choices for breakfast, snacks and dinner. Usually we don’t go to restaurants, he is not happy with closed spaces.

CindyWismer
[email protected]
96.251.186.174
I am a retired special educator.  I have written two books about my experiences.  One is a short story- a fun read about a special ed class and the other a Guide for parents.

CindyWismer
[email protected]
96.251.186.174
Great progress!  This shows that your daughter is interacting and trying to please others as well as having fun. If she is picky about veggies, you might try “hiding” them in other foods.  I used to put green beans in my son’s tuna sandwich.
Technology is such a good tool for children with ASD.

sneedley13
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86.143.74.117
My son is 7 now, and has only recently been diagnosed ASD… to answer the questions:

1. The Boy has never been a fan of anything with a strong flavour or smell. I will ask him to try something, and if he says no, I leave it and try again another time. If he says ok (usually reluctantly) I will give him just enough to be able to taste it and feel the texture in his mouth, then its up to him. If he like it and wants more, I’ll give him more. If he doesn’t want more, I don’t push it. Also, if he ever asks about anything on mine or Dad’s plate, we always let him try it.

2. The Boy has table manners when he focuses on what he is doing, but he struggles with his co-ordination, so finds it hard to use the knife and fork together to cut, or push things onto he fork. If he’s sat at the table on his own, he will often use his fingers to push thing on the plate onto his fork, or into his mouth. He also often puts too much food in his mouth at once, and usually ends up with some food/sauce/gravy on his face.

3. I don’t have too many concerns about his diet, he knows when he has eaten enough and will turn down treats of he’s not hungry. He won’t drink fizzy drinks because he doesn’t like the feeling in his mouth, so really only drinks water or juice (doesn’t like squash too much as its too sweet)

4. We can take The Boy to a restaurant, although he struggles to understand why the food doesn’t come as soon as you order it, and I am always concious of people watching his table manners.

5. School (as you appeared to imply) is a different matter. When he was at nursery as a 2/3 yr old, he would eat anything he was given (including things that he ‘didnt like’ at home) and on the occasions that he does have school dinners, he will eat whatever is on the menu. He does prefer to take packed lunches though, because he eats cooked meals quite slowly, and says that he has more time to play when he eats his packed lunch – he always eats everything though!

As an aside, he will only eat McDonalds, and will only have a cheese burger happy meal (without the gherkin, they are ‘dirty’)

4Cards
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24.117.116.254
I started sensory therapy with my daughter and they said to have play time with food not during a meal time more as an activity and try and find foods they would not normally eat and play and see if they will try it. 1st we did celery and ranch, she tried the celery but not the ranch, second carrots with ranch again tried the carrots but not the ranch. The therapist showed her how the food crunched and she mimicked her both times. And last week we did chips with guacamole I knew shed eat the chips but she even tried the guacamole. So it had been a huge success for us:) I think it also helps it is someone other than me or my husband doing it and it is not at home!

We use a Ipad or Iphone at eat out meals for both our young kids its so hard for them to sit still for so long without some help:)

CoriSutphin
[email protected]
166.216.165.18
My son literally only eats two foods that are cooked and that’s grilled cheese and honey butter rolls. He doesn’t eat any fruits, vegetables or meats! NONE!
His pediatrician had to fill out a special dietary form for school where they make him a grilled cheese daily, however, he doesn’t like the texture of wheat bread so he picks the cheese off of it and eats it that way. Yes, he’s even picky about the type of bread.
His sensory issues cause him to vomit if he can’t stand the smell or texture so i would be thrilled beyond belief if his diet was as large as your sons! I definitely understand your concern and plan on checking back to see if anyone has ideas!

PeteKijek
[email protected]
81.100.240.167
Hi there!!
Thought I’d throw my tuppence in, from my experiences of what my son eats when he’s with me, and what I hear from his mother.1)    How did you get your child to eat different foodstuff?  What techniques did you use?  What worked and what didn’t?
With Dylan, it’s a very slow process. There was a time when he wouldn’t eat anything but Marks and Spencer ready meals. Not exactly bad for him, but his mother and I used to long for the day he would sit and eat the same as us.
He’s a lot better now, eating a wider variety of foods. We found it was textures that would dictate whether he ate them or not. He enjoys my sausage and mash, and even eats a few peas now. He’s also a massive fan of chicken nuggets and chips, and pizza (depending on which brand it is! ) I can sometimes get him to eat my bolognese bake, but he prefers his mother’s as she puts a hint of mild chilli powder in it to give it some pep.
He loves cheese, crisps (ready salted only) and I was told over christmas he enjoyed hog roast and venison- when I was still with his mother we could never have hoped he would eat a roast dinner!

2)   How did you teach your child table manners?
He sort of picked this up by himself. He does still enjoy finger food more – it’s textures yet again- but ever since we got him on the ready meals, we have always encouraged the knife and fork.

3)   Are you concerned about the nutrient value or your child’s diet?  Have you been to a dietician?
Provided he’s not eating junk, and has a good healthy mix, neither of us really mind him eating repetitively, if you know what I mean. By the sound of it, your son has a good mix of the basic food groups, so is doing ok.

4)   Can you go you restaurants with your child?  Do you need an iPad?  We do.
One year on holiday at Trecco Bay in Porthcawl ( a great holiday/caravan park if you have autistic kids) we ate in the restaurant several nights in a row, and we were worried he wouldn’t sit still and would keep getting up and wandering around the restaurant. He did us very proud, eating most of what we got for him (sticking to what we knew he ate in ready meal form).

5)   What about food at school?
I get fairly regular reports from his mother about his eating habits at school, and there are actually things he will eat at school that he doesn’t touch at home! I think you’re possibly right about it being a case of a different setting. What he eats at home he may well not eat at school, and vice versa- so be patient with him, know he’s eating something, and make sure he eats balanced at home, and you can’t go wrong 😉

PS  John does go to fast food joints but won’t eat the burgers.  And he hates ketchup.
Dylan’s the same. I occasionally take him to McDonalds, and he’ll only ever eat the McNuggets. I’d dearly love for him to have a burger- and he did have half of one at his uncle’s 21st birthday BBQ last year at my mother’s house- his mother tells me he is starting to have burgers at home, which is a good sign!
Be prepared, though, for your son to eat certain things in one place, and not in the other. Last year (2012) for my birthday, I took Dylan to a gastro pub restaurant- I thought it would make a posh change to McDonalds- and he ordered the nuggets and chips- neither of which are like McDonalds ones. Now, he ate the chips no trouble, but tried one nugget (which was really more of a piece of diced chicken breast than the manufactured nuggets you usually get, and he wouldn’t eat any more- all because they weren’t McDonalds’ or Iceland’s ones.
The biggest piece of advice I can offer is to have patience. Dylan’s 8 now (will be 9 this summer) and he’s only just now starting to come around to different tastes. It helps that both his elder twin brothers are in college training to be chefs, and regularly bring home what they’ve cooked that day.
It might seem your son isn’t getting a balanced diet, but by the sound of it he’s doing fine, and with gentle, patient encouragement, he’ll slowly start accepting other foods and tastes/textures.
I hope that helps?
Pete in Cardiff (and Dylan in Shrewsbury)

karlcotanna
[email protected]
101.161.60.154
Vicoria.

when younger my boy had lots of trouble with food, manners and eating in general. Textures were/are the biggest!!  Made mash potatoes a little more creamy(extra milk or eggs), also would and pumpkin and spinach. over time just kept adding more vegie varieties. his table habits were bad and he would scoff his food and overload his mouth, not sure how he never choked!! he had to be told b4 every bite “just a little, chew, chew, chew” and while doing that place his hands flat on table till he had swallowed. still only likes cheese, yoghurt, bananas, pineapple and hot dogs and hot chips!!  has learnt to eat his mash vegies and fish chicken and red meat. all minimal. but loves sausages, meatballs and rissoles.(not terribly healthy), oh and chicken nuggets! has improved  over the years and have always put out utensils for eating, which he now uses, mostly! still needs to b reminded of small amounts in mouth. he gets to have input for lunch which is generally the same every day. cheese sandwhich, yoghurt museli bar(this is fairly new) or fruit stick, and a banana. As always persistence and patience. hopefully improves over time. And we didn’t go out for tea ever. we have kind of tried but its hard to find things he likes on the menu, lol!  good luck with it all.

JillianMatthews
[email protected]
68.203.9.111
Omg I wish my asd son would eat like that he barely eats anything he eats fruits and yogurt cereal bars a few snacks like fruit snacks crackers and pringles so I buy the real fruit ones and whole grain or multigrain everything else his doctor says its normal his palette will grow with time and has me giving him pediasure shakes, vitamins, water, milk. I put out ice trays with different fruits vegetables grains a lot of different things all day long I use ice trays bcuz different foods can’t touch and different colors can’t touch. He won’t touch anything with a strong smell or anything wet like noodles or pasta I’m losing my mind. He still gains weight and is growing in fact he’s above average for his height and median in age for weight. It’s frustrating I just want him to eat healthy so I keep trying hoping he’ll try. One trick i learned with him is to take him shopping with me and let him pick his foods out when done that way if he chose it he’ll at least attempt to try unless the smell is too strong for him.

JanaHebertTaffLackey
[email protected]
74.84.23.91
wow,,what i would give for my 16 year old asd child to eat that well, Heath, only eats chicken, hamburger meat, carrots and that is all….. he wont eat cheese because someone along time ago told him only rats eat cheese. so now he wont eat it…

Autism and Challenging Behaviour Part Seven – How to stop an autistic child from taking their clothes off in public. Some great tips!

Autism and Challenging Behavior

Autism and Challenging Behavior

As regular readers of this blog know, we are very interested in discussing how autistic young and their caregivers have managed to deal with the myriad of social situations which the interaction of autistic people with the world can generate.

One of those issues frequently comes up is taking off clothes in unsuitable places.  Indeed there is quite a famous autism meme on the internet which reminds its readers “Not to be surprised if someone appears in the nude in this house” or words to that effect.

I’ll be honest: While our son is happy to wear clothes, he does like taking them off for serious activities like playing on the iPad or watching science fiction on TV. It normally takes him around 30 minutes before he has removed at least one garment after returning from school or a weekend trip.

According to the teachers at his unit, he never takes his clothes off at school, unlike a number of his fellow students. Indeed, over the last few weeks, he has asked if we could put some back on on a couple of occasions.

I’d say it is, for John, a minor issue, but for others, this is very much not the case.   Indeed, most people who see him after stripping know him well and are relaxed.  It would be great to hear from others about their experiences in this area.  It would be useful if you could think in terms of some of the following questions:-

a)     Do you have a problem with a child with autism taking off their clothes?

b)    Do you have a feel for what triggers this kind of behaviour and does it have any specific places where it manifests itself?

c)     How did you overcome it?

d)    What one piece of advice would you give to other parents and caregivers in such a situation?

These questions are only a guide.  Please feel free to use the comments boxes below to add anything you think may be of interest on the subject to our readers.

Nana62 How do you deal with a child with autism wanting to run naked as there is two children in the home which are girls. Will this become a bigger problem as the kids get older?Right now girl age 9, girl age 4, autistic boy age 6
Athansmom My 14 year old son has been stripping down naked outside and in the garage. Tonight he snuck out at 10 pm, stripped down and waded through the drainage ditches behind the house and behind the neighbors house. He said his head told him to go on a Safari adventure???? I would never go in those ditches in the daylight with clothes and shoes never mind butt naked.
teenaok45 My 14 year strips down to nothing when she is angry or wanting something. She will take off her shirt if she is hungry or wants something done right NOW.
The issue that our family struggles with is that she wants everyone else’s cloths. She wants to wear some of the cloths…..but most of the time it is only to carry around.  Our struggle with clothing every where all the time is a battle that I would like to WIN. I realize that the fact that she takes off her clothing to get her point across should have been addressed when she was much younger. Yet, I am the step mom. Her mother would always give her what she wanted to get her clothing back on. As we ignore her behavior she will finally start getting dressed again. Yet, there are times when she is completely passionate about something and will start banging her head or running down the road. AT this point I will give her what she is wanting. This is the first forum I have seen with even a discussion on this issue. I would like to find any one who has had this same issue??? I am wondering if there are any other suggestion out there. We have purchased weighted blankets / lap pads. I will even heat them up in the dryer. WE are only a week into this trial period. I am having to hide/lock up every ones clothing to keep her from gathering and carrying…..Thank you for any shares.
Tabbitha14 Keepemon.com a site we have created with a bodysuit that has helped our son carter keep his clothes on
ColtonsMomma My son is eight and a well known stripper in this area of Altoona PA my cure to limit this he doesn’t do it as often anymore I take and physically make him put the clothes back on himself as soon as he takes them off or when I see it coming He loves those silk basketball shorts boys wear so when he gets home he’ ll bring me a pair off his bed I try to understand he feels better when he is in loose clothes he won’t wear blue jeans or layers
Bones235 autistic5468 my son doesn’t want to wear anything… used to have to wait for him to fall asleep in order to get a diaper on him so he wouldn’t wet the bed. only thing we could do is let him go and limit his water intake before bed and make sure he goes potty before falling asleep.
MylaBides my 11 year old daughter who has autism and also profoundly deaf, removes her pants and diaper at times. sometimes while sleeping. so we’d wake up and she’s wet the bed. initially, when she was 9-10 yrs old, i got her swim suits over her diaper and under her clothes. it is just hard to dress her up because of the many layers, but she got used to it and we eventually stopped putting it on her. now, the behaviour is back and the swim suits are too small to fit her. so instead of getting her bigger swimsuits, we got her pants with a string around the waist that we can tighten in a ribbon to prevent her pulling them down. and a onesies which i hope she will not outgrow anymore.
i would recommend consistency when it comes to unacceptable behaviour. if i see her doing it, i pull them back up right away. even when she’s at home or in the privacy of her room.
ShannonKrohn autistic5468 I had a lot of trouble with my ASD son who is 3 now keeping his diaper on when he was younger , he would pull it off and waist so many diapers like that , I had to keep onesies on him for as long as i could and was lucky enough to find some larger ones , then i had to keep the zip up footie PJ’s on him until he figured out how to unzip them , i heard some people say you can cut the feet off and turn them backwards and that helps keep it on and the diaper , i also heard a few different people speak of duct tape around the waistline of the diapers lightly to prevent the child from pulling the tabs off
autistic5468 Does anyone have an Autistic child that will not
keep his/her diaper on. I have an Autistic child
that will not keep his diaper on for nothing.
dmwarwick My 16 year old son always likes to remove his clothes when he goes swimming in the pool.  Now, this wasn’t sure a big problem when he was 5 yrs old, but now that he’s hit puberty, it’s an entirely different story!  My sister is the only one that has a pool and so when she has parties at her house, my son will undoubtely want to swim and within minutes, the shorts are being flung out of the pool!  His other cousins are sometimes lifesavers and will put his shorts back on his (under the water), because he always seems to wait until he’s in the deep end to take off his shorts (where I can’t get to him).   I think he associates the pool water as the same as taking a “bath”.   He also likes to swim naked, which maybe that is not so abnormal, but you think about how it will affect him when he’s older and not able to live at home anymore (with Mom and Dad).    Does anyone else have problems with their child swimming or sleeping naked?  Not sure how common this is.   Thanks!
Terry Clark passionateapanda  I could not have said it better!!!!

Terry Clark mysonmyworld  This is a great idea and I will try to lay out his clothes before he gets to the point of stripping . At this point I will try any thing to keep him dressed. I am so scared to send him any where because in the end result some one will eventually call social service and give an opinion of some thing they know nothing about. I find that if people don’t know what is possible with an autistic child unless they have some education on the matter. Thank you for your input and your involvement on this site.
beaniebikerbabe mysonmyworld   same here although now he is older (13) he is not runing about naked, but is in his pj’s straight away from school and stays in them as long as he can, if we travel any distance he wants to be in pjama bottoms only and i am fine with this so long as he is covering his mondesty
graycelikerain My son, 9 yo Aspie, only has this issue when he goes to the bathroom.  I would hear him screaming and yelling from the bathroom because he couldn’t get his clothes off fast enough and apparently needed to REALLY go.  (He also had other “odd” bathroom behaviors).  He is now 9 and he still comes out of the restroom with his shorts on backwards and shirt inside out (which is how I know he still strips to go to the restroom).  As a baby, before we knew anything, he would fuss and fuss unless we took his pants off.  It was his diaper as well, back when they used plastic tabs vs the now fabric tabs.  He was fine with shirts.  Sensory was what we were always told, back when he was four.  However, now that he’s 9, I’ve asked him why he takes all of his clothes off when he goes to the bathroom (even in a public restroom – which he used to REFUSE to use anyones restroom but our own, in our house), his response, “I don’t know…I just do”.
mysonmyworld My son dose the same thing if people dont know anything about autistic behavior then they need to mind their own business
mysonmyworld As soon as my 10yr old autistic son walks in the front door he is stripping his clothes off. He hates wearing anything but basketball shorts and a big tee shirt So b4 i even go pick him up from the bus stop I set out a tee shirt and a pair of basketball shorts cause he wears a uniform to school. It helps to lay the clothes out b4 my son gets home that way when he gets home and starts stripping i can point and tell him ok theres your conffy clothes and he is not just walking around in his underware
tifleah It is probably sensory related. Have you noticed certain materials it is worse with to stick with only buying certain material, or remove all tags. My kids both do this at home. One is growing out of it, not as bad as he was, and one still does but not in public.
passionateapanda My 6yo autistic son does this frequently at home or grandmas where he feels comfortable. I personally have no issue with this behavior but my family doesn’t seem to be as accepting of this. I have recently had a social worker come to the home and ask “accusations are that you allow your son to run around naked is this true? ” I answer in fact he does this is his house and if he doesn’t want to wear clothes what’s the problem? I’m tired of other uneducated people making assumptions that because my child is naked there is a bigger issues there is and it’s their stupidity. He did however undress himself at school but he stopped doing that about 3 months ago. The second he comes home from school he takes them all off and runs threw the house FREE!
teenagerwithautistim I’m Autistic and this used to be a real issue for me personally – quite dangerously so-. I just very commonly didn’t understand what the issue was with it and it was by being discouraged from doing it is what stopped me doing it and eventually the situation fixed itself. I don’t personally advocate it but slapping me was what worked and kept me safe in public, I didn’t want to do it after that and it was embarrassing to be hit and I didn’t like being hit. If you could find a suitable deterrent for your situations, I’m sure that would work.
Terry Clark klcooks  Thank you for your reply and any advice is well taken. We have been up and down with Johnathan and he is aware some times ans others not. We have had some extremely embarrassing moments and some that have angered us to the point were we sounded off to the people who were so rude and uncaring to our grand son. We will always be aware of some one who will belittle children that are challenged when it comes to every day advantages and down rite disrespectful. We will embrace your ideas and put them to the test Thank you again for your thoughts and cares  Terry Clark  .
klcooks My son Chase has always been a “flasher” of sorts but as in everything, I’m learning he requires routine.  At home, I allow him to stay nude for about 5 minutes and then we put on his pajamas or a comfortable shirt with shorts.  He used to do it mainly in the car but now he only takes off his socks and shoes.  It’s been trial and error but I think the key is to not get frustrated.  I think Chase picked up on our embarassment and frustration at times and it only made it worse.  I will continue to train him as to what is appropriate so it can be routine.  Keep praying not only for our children but for the strength, courage and wisdom to care for them while we wait on real medical solutions.
Harmony6 This behavior only started recently (past 2 months) in my 9 y/o ASD son. He too, starts the strip upon arriving home from school, typically with his shirt and socks, but is often totally in the nude in his room when playing his iPad or on the family laptop. On occasion he will appear downstairs to watch TV naked much to the dismay of his sisters. He used to be very modest and now is unfazed. I gently remind him that not everyone is impressed or appreciates all of his body parts and since some are dirtier than others because they aren’t washed as often, perhaps they could be covered when using common areas and provided him a robe….We’ll see what happens!
Terry Clark I always have problems with him and clothes and it seems like the only time he will get dressed is if we are going to go out side and if it is nice he wants to undress.
LalaliciouzArciga Iam a motheof a 4 year diagnosed with autism and I have zthe same issues regarding the clothes matter he also don’t like socksnor shoes
Terry Clark I have not figured out why Johnathan takes his clothes off and I don’t  know if I ever will and it has become a big big issue for us to keep him in clothes.  We went to McDonalds play land and Jonathan took his clothes off in the slide and while we were trying to get his clothes on the manager approached us and very sarcastically asked if we was planning on dressing our son. and it was then that i realized that only a few people would understand what autism is and my Johnathan would always need some one to defend him as to the fact he cant talk or work out problems that are essential to functioning in every day living. and when it comes to people being cruel and demeaning to him he would not know that he was being attacked because of his Autism. Johnathan is very loving and dont have a violent bone in his body and when it comes to pain he does not react to pain in any way we would . I am fifty years old and have custody of my five year old grand son and my greatest fear is that I am going to get to old to take care of him when he is older . Johnathan does not have any one else to step up and take over the responsibility of guardian. I find every day I am living life in desperation to find away to make sure he will be loved and not abused when I am gone.and that is the worst thing I could live with.
FamWallman My son also feels warm or egen hot most of the time. I would like to know if anyone knows if there are any theories why they feel hot. Does it have anything to do with metabolism, nutrition, inflammatory, or something else?
autumnjoy79 My daughter used to strip when she was angry, it didn’t matter where she was at. She has since outgrown that stage. The only thing she does everyday is change her clothes back into pajamas as soon as she gets home from school everyday.
VickiDennison I’m wondering if it has something to do with feeling safe and secure at home and stripping outside or at school could be their way of telling us they don’t feel secure and want to go home? I know my son doesn’t like trousers with buttons and certain tops. He also hates wearing socks and they are the 1st things to be removed as soon as we walk thru the door
RosieMarie My son does this and I never linked it to the autism or the sensory issues.  He only does it at home in the afternoon.  It usually starts with his left sock.  about an hour or two later the pants will follow.  Next would be his shirt.  Last is the other sock.
Trixie Ong

Autism and Unconscious vandalism. Please can you help my wife and I with some advice please?

Our son who has autism

Our son, who has autism

I’m not 100% sure how to explain exactly what my problem is. Perhaps the best way is to tell the story of yesterday’s incident and ask for your advice on how we can help our son (and ourselves) find a solution. I’ve included this as part of our ongoing series on autism and challenging behaviour.

As you may or may not know, we have a seven-year-old son (called John) who is on the autistic spectrum. As we know, people with autism show a wide variety of behaviours, and pretty much none show the same exact pattern. That being said, many readers may have had similar experiences and will be able to suggest some ways my wife and I can work with John to try and end what I have called in the title of this blog post “unconscious vandalism”.

One of the things our son likes to do is spend time alone watching videos on YouTube. He mainly likes to watch science programs and similar programs. However, in the last week, he has started to take an interest in voting systems, but that is another matter.

Over the last few weeks, he has taken to blocking the door to the room where we keep the computer with a chair. I can understand that, like a lot of people with autism, he likes to be on his own. That being said, it seems now not to be the only reason.

Yesterday I came into the computer room in to get him to go to the kitchen for his supper and discovered what he had been up to. In the brief time since we had last looked in on him he has used a chair to climb up to the top of the bookshelves. He then took down a set of Russian dolls of which I was and am very fond and, well, smashed them up. Interestingly he did not bother to hide the evidence but just left the detritus of his actions on the floor.

I have no idea why he did so, and on asking him, it seems that neither does he. Hence, I describe his actions as unconscious vandalism. I don’t think that he is taking revenge on us, but again, he does know it is wrong. He could certainly see that I was upset when I saw the results of his afternoon.

By the way the incident can only have taken about 10 minutes since the last time we looked in on him.

So what to do? I have to say I’m clueless.

Thus, I’m turning this over to you. What can my wife and I do to wean John off these behaviours? Have you experienced anything similar in your life?

We would appreciate it if you could use the comments section below to share your stories and any advice you may have for us.

Thanks very much in advance.

MANDY1967 Repetitive behaviour, anxiety, boredom, attention seeking, communication/ processing information confusion and destructive behaviour, self soothing/ stimulating behaviours are hard to work out the difference. If you haven’t observed the slightly different indicators It will make your work extra hard.
Write down little differences.
As you say it can look unconscious, but if your child is shrugging and saying I don’t know or I don’t remember or I didn’t do it.
Then giving them an emotional vocabulary is top priority.
seems extreme but so is the behaviour….Set up a camera that can’t be seen So you can observe the indicators if he is being secretive about the behaviour.
Often secretive can be an indicator of feeling guilty about the negative behaviour but not feeling safe to ask or not knowing that they need to ask for help if perfectionism is an issue…. “how can I fix my behaviour?”
Instead of saying no, no, no you can try diversion with explanation…… e.g. I think you are feeling tired, how about getting your blanket. (choose a blanket.that has threads similar to the destroyed material.)
Think creatively.
The destroyed babushka dolls. How do they fit together, maybe it was a sequencing issue. He was unable to get them to work. Frustration that they won’t work. Using too much force (this cause affect regulation gets worse as they get stronger…..how much force is needed to unscrew a lid, retighten a lid?…..how much force Is needed to make something fit without breaking it?)
Did he have a dream about them or see some on the internet? Ask questions.
Try to work on one issue at a time, isolate it from ALL the other behaviour. This appears to be the only way to see effective change.
Weariness of repeating ourselves is a vital change we need to work on in ourselves.
Repetition of simple explanations are imperative.
Explain it different ways. Ask him to repeat what you say.
For example “I’m feeling tired, Ill go get my blanket.
or he might say “I’m not tired.” Make him accountable.
Tease out an answer.
“What are you feeling then? Give him options….sad? Why?
Are you struggling with your visit to Nan’s the other day? What happened?”)
Accountability is often the perfect logical consequence. This way a lesson is learned until the behaviour becomes less and less.
A communication/ processing issue is not impossible. Just allow for processing time. You could say
Ill come.back in 10 minutes or it might work better if you just sit quietly.
Don’t get impatient. The more patient you are, the quicker your answer will be.
Know what you have struggles with yourself. Teach yourself.
Be accountable yourself to be able to support your son. Are you angry, disappointed etc. Tell your son, explain your feelings.”this is how I act when I’m disappointed. My mummy gave me the dolls and they were special. I could have shown you how to fit them together.”
We can’t really have private things with our little ones. But as they get older, it gets easier.
E.g.
The rules have to be the same for everyone though.
I have a special drawer. This drawer is inspected by each of my sons. Then it was closed and left alone to be mine.
Each son has a special box. Each boy respects that box.
With the oldest this was the hardest to teach.
The oldest shares EVERYTHING whether his or not.
Is it generosity?
Is it jealousy?
One emotion at a time. One behaviour at a time. Let the little things slip. You ll get to it later.
Don’t over stimulate.
Get him to analyse your moods.
This is all imperative learning.
Our job as parents is to teach our little ones emotional literacy.
Sensory self soothing is a vital part of a happy child.
Find what works for your child.
Ask “what is he getting out of this behaviour?”.
Attach a mood… use explanations.
Not just stopping at…why did you do that?
MamiAyo Have you tried a rewards system at all, my daughter is 4 1/2 and was diagnosed 1 month ago as being on the spectrum, however we were using the system before hand being assured by her previous Paed Specialist it was a behavioral issue, hence why she was diagnose at a late age…even with all the obvious symptoms and our detailed description of her unfamiliar behavior…..Delayed speech/sensory overload/public interaction..
Thankfully we are now in the care of another Specialist.
Sarah_Hills I am sorry to hear this, I also want to thank you for posting this. To know someone is going through the same things as you are takes a little bit of weight off the shoulders. The only thing that has helped with us is social stories, My little girl finds it hard to express her self and we find that’s when she starts to destroy things. So maybe do a story about him breaking something and how it makes you feel. I would also do a story of when I feel sad, Mad, Alone I can talk to mum or dad or hug a teddy. Doesn’t stop it completely but reduces and they start to understand what to do if you read them the social story every day.
ChantelleLeluda I feel for you , we too have the same issues , my partner and myself are into dragons and wizards , have always been , all our ornaments that we have left have ended up in a box put away for now , we don’t leave anything out that we don’t want our little man to damage , yes we do use the word no a frequently but have fond it does not work very well with our son , our modular lounge has been destroyed by our son , he will sit there and pull out the fine strands when we are busy cooking dinner , hanging out washing or even going to the toilet , we have holes on the lounge everywhere because of it , he has done the same with his mattress to his bed , he also like to pull out the fine threading on my bra’s and underwear , he has no respect for any of his toys or clothes as he will throw them around , smash and break them , we have tried everything to try stop him from doing all this , my son only just got diagnosed and is 4 so we finally have a speech pathologist and a occupation therapist assisting us but that is only over the past couple of weeks , we are yet to discuss with them how to stop this behaviour , once I find out more I will gladly post on here , hope what ever we do find out will assist 🙂
Bones235 i have absolutely no idea how to help… but i can say i have been there… DAILY…anything and everything i have cherished has been busted or ruined by my son.  he knows he has to hide or sneak to do it. but doesn’t understand that it’s wrong or hurtful.  he also breaks his own toys or those of his brothers. i love the little guy more than life and i want to create a world he can grow in.  it’s difficult.  i would love to know the answer.

Autism and challenging behaviour 14 – some ideas for helping keep the noise down

Noisy child

Noisy child

TRYING TO QUIET A LOUD AUTISTIC CHILD OR TODDLER || Autism Tips For Caregivers

Some great tips from and Autistic Mon who is also a great Youtuber. You can follow her on Twitter here.

For more in our series Autism and Challenging Behaviour have a look at our series here.

Autism and Challenging Behaviour Part 13 – Nail Cutting. How can to persuade an autistic child to have their toe or finger nails cut?

Autism and emotional connections

Autism and emotional connections

For the nearly a year now we have been running a series of blog posts which we have called “Autism and Challenging Behaviour“. These have varied from how to deal with meltdowns to going having a haircut.

In fact I’ve used it to get advice on issues relating to John our 8 year old son with ASD.

Last week in our Facebook page AutismTalk one of our readers asked the very reasonable question “anyone have trouble cutting your childs toe nails?”.

With well over 200 responses I thought this would be a great opportunity to share some of the tips shared by our other readers.

If you have any suggestions it would be great if you could use the comments box below to tell us more.

So here goes (and my apologies to anyone we have missed out) :-

“My 6 yo asd adhd sounded like we were trying to cut a limb off when we were cutting his finger and toe nails so I did them when he was asleep. Now he cuts them himself with nail clippers (under our supervision). He feels grown up, it’s far less stress for us all and the job gets done. Xxx”

“Its a sensory processing problem. Can get better through therapy. My 5 yr old is same way. Hes about to begin his therapy.”

” My son is now 15 and finger and toe nail cutting were always a problem. Unfortunately he has solved it by now biting them but the trauma of fighting gets too much after the many years. He hates hair cuts and grew his hair long. Then one day I told him he needed to have it cut and he had it cut to zero! Now he keeps it short by letting me give him regular trims but only when he is Sat in the bath. These sensory issues are traits of autism and we learn to cope with them along side our child as they grow. As we find a coping mechanism for one trait another trait appears. Good luck to you all xxx”


” I have a kicking 2 year old. He loves deep pressure and general “horseplay” and I discovered when he needed ear drops that I could roll him in a blanket like a burrito and he actually enjoys it! I use burrito boy method for lots of things now, including toe nail trimming! He just laughs and thinks it’s the greatest thing ever.”

“I feel for you, it’s so hard, like no one else would believe……our support team told us to brush toes or fingers first with a medium texture brush….perhaps toothbrush or something ( u can get sensory brushes from America) but that seems to send the right messages to the toes and fingers to expect pressure…..hope that’s some help. Good luck, keep going, we all hear you.”

“I only do my sons after a bath so his nails are soft. And with some reassurance and promising i wont hurt him. He lets me do them while singing 12345 once i caught a fish alive etc. Xx”

“My son is 5. He is okay when I cut his finger nails but his toe nails is torture for him so I do it when he is watching tv or playing with his tablet. Washing hair has gotten better but he doesn’t like it when I’m pouring the water on his head. I tell him to cover his eyes and I try to rinse him off as quickly as possible and dry his face first when done. I think it helps too that I use a handheld shower head since it rinses the hair a little quicker. Good luck! I forgot to mention that having a visual schedule helps a lot. Try reminding him a day before that you will be cutting his nails and take a picture of you cutting his nails and show it to him next time to remind him and prepare him.”

“We used to. Then I told him that when he’s sleeping tiny monkeys poop in his finger nails and toe nails. Lol now when its time to cut his nails he is thankful that we’re cleaning out all that monkey poop”

“Just keep doing it on a regular basis build it into a routine and he will accept it mostly but if like mine still has off days lol just repeat repeat repeat youll get there in the end also offer a bribe i find that works usually something he likes good luck”

” Try using a nail file its way less scary for the child. I work in a day centre”

“Try massaging arms & legs firmly then gradually making your way down to hands & feet if the child is old enough explain & let them watch same with hair washing, put a mirror in the bathroom firm massage helps with the sensory & it would make our lives easier.. Mine is 14 now & he does his own, life gets better with time.. Goodluck.”

” Counting helps my daughter. So for example letting her know what number I am on and how many more we have left. She use to scream and kick and try to get away. Now counting she doesn’t. She understands the process behind counting so maybe that helps her mind understand!”

So what are your tips? If you have a question you would like to ask our group about autism and challenging behaviour why not write to [email protected].

Many thanks in advance!

 

JenP When my son was younger numbers calmed him, so first we’d count out each toe as I clipped, but sometimes that wouldn’t be enough. He also loved Thomas The Tank Engine, each main character engine had a number painted on its sides, so we combined the trains and numbers and cut each nail in order.
I would name each train in order of number to matxh each toe clipped. Thomas, Edward, Henry, Gordon = 1, 2, 3, 4, and so on.
Kept his concentration and thinking of sources of happiness.