Groom Upset After Fiancée Suggests His Sister and Her Newborn Sit in Back Corner to Ensure "Peaceful Ceremony"

Your wedding is (ideally) a once-in-a-lifetime celebration, which is why many couples getting married try to eliminate as many disruptions as possible—read: why child-free weddings are becoming increasingly more popular. When one bride-to-be was planning her big day, she excluded most children from her guest list, other than those on either side of their family. For her future sister-in-law and her newborn, though, the future bride made one particular request, which has put her in hot water with her fiancé.

Writing to Reddit’s subreddit “Am I the A------“ on August 8, 2024, the woman told the internet that the groom’s sister is giving birth before their wedding, and she plans on bringing the child to their nuptials. Although the couple is letting their relatives bring their kids who are three to eleven years old, the bride-to-be is hesitant about having a new baby in the crowd. “However I’m concerned about the potential for a newborn to cry during the ceremony, which is very important to us since babies just cry whenever,” she shared.

Given her wariness, the woman came up with a compromise: The newborn baby could come, as long as the child and their parents sat in the back corner during the service. Her reasoning? “They could leave quickly if needed, and it wouldn’t affect the ceremony or videographer,” she said. The groom isn’t on board with the idea, however. “My fiancé thinks it’s rude to suggest this before the baby is even born and is upset about the idea,” the OP recapped. “I’m stressed with planning and want to minimize disruptions.”

In a series of edits, the Redditor clarified that she is “NOT trying to exclude the newborn” and isn’t “picking and choosing” certain child relatives to come to their wedding. Instead, she emphasized that all family’s kids are welcome at both the ceremony and reception, but with the newborn, she wants to make a bit of an adjustment. “I view a newborn baby to be much more unpredictable since they can cry at any point in time from my experience,” she noted. 

After asking Reddit to weigh in, the internet concluded that the future bride was acting unreasonably—for various reasons. Many thought her concern about having a crying child was irrational and selfish. “Your wedding should definitely be about you and what you want, but for crying out loud, it’s not like you’ll be taking a video of the ceremony and submitting it for Oscar consideration,” someone said. “Who actually cares if a baby cries for a minute or two during your wedding, as long as your friends and loved ones are there to celebrate you and your fiancé?” 

Some saw the treatment toward the future sister-in-law as unjust. “Telling someone to sit in the back is rude,” a Redditor put it plainly. “You may as well just tell her not to come.” Some thought the woman was being inconsiderate of her husband. “YTA for not really considering that your fiancé might not want close family members seated in the back,” another comment expressed. 

Most people who contributed to the post pointed out that the woman is worrying about the wrong demographic. “I don’t think you understand the concept of a child-free wedding if you are allowing children,” the top comment said. “I hate to be the one to break this to you, but the 3yo is far more likely to disrupt your ceremony than the infant is.”