Before his P was penetrated by Donald's T, before thousands of women called him to chat about their menses, even before he lost Indiana more than $60 million by signing one of the most homophobic laws ever, Mike Pence was a cartoonist.
His drawings, which starred the vice president-elect's alter ego, Law School Daze, were published in Indiana University's Robert H. McKinney School of Law newspaper in the mid eighties.
And though they contain few words, these once-forgotten doodles say a lot about the kind of student Pence was and the kind of politician he would become.
The annoying kind.
Here's Daze being a buzzkill about criminal law:
And here he is lying about his desperate need for approval:
In this one, we see why Pence might find his current running mate comforting:
And here, Daze makes a magazine with a pun for a title. Similarly, Pence tried to use taxpayers' money to fund a news outlet called "Just IN," which was going to be written by the government about the government.
Daze could dish out sick burns, just like Pence, who called out the Patriots by posting a picture of a deflated football. Got 'em!
Daze didn't really know how to live it up on vacation. Likewise, Pence eats at Chili's when he comes to New York.
Both Pence and Daze are lousy sharers. Daze with medical students, Pence with Syrian refugees. And Mexicans. Really anyone who doesn't speak English. Don't they have anyplace else to go?
Eventually, Daze upgraded his logo so it wasn't embarrassing anymore. Sound familiar?
And the most glaring similarity between Pence and Daze is their difficulty grasping this whole "legal system" thing. (See: abortion, Syrian refugees.)
Sure, we all did embarrassing things in college. Some of us drank too much, some had regrettable one-night stands, some belonged to actual fraternities.
Mike Pence drew unfunny comic strips.
And while most of us deserve to have these minor social missteps erased from society's collective memory (we were finding ourselves!), most of us have not given the remaining shreds of our integrity to Donald Trump in exchange for a shot at the vice presidency.
So, Internet, meet Daze. Daze, meet the Internet.