The Journey of a Sage
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About this ebook
Kristen Bomas
Kristen Bomas is a speaker, author, workshop facilitator, licensed psychotherapist, and the creator of The Sage’s Template, a relationship framework for the most anguished and complicated of marriages - the one between yourself and your universe that won’t behave. By addressing the fact that life always ditches the original plan, her work reveals how fear becomes a bedfellow. Trauma gets the better of us. Contentment sees other people. And divorce from our true nature is therefore inevitable. But we can mend this delicate, fractured bond we have to the world around us. If we’re willing to venture beyond the margins of our normal thought patterns...and confront what awaits us there. Kristen invites us to reunite with life, spirit, ambition, community, business partners, and personal genius. With no one-size-fits-all technique, she requires in her clients and the organizations she engages with, a willingness to explore. Because “mastering” life has nothing to do with rigorous control. And everything to do with curious investigation.
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The Journey of a Sage - Kristen Bomas
Copyright © 2022 Kristen Bomas.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or
mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the
written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, names, incidents, organizations, and dialogue in
this novel are either the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.
Balboa Press
A Division of Hay House
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Bloomington, IN 47403
www.balboapress.com
844-682-1282
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed
since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do
not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of
treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or
indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest
for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself,
which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.
ISBN: 979-8-7652-2630-8 (sc)
ISBN: 979-8-7652-2631-5 (e)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2022905232
Balboa Press rev. date: 06/10/2022
Contents
Introduction
Preface: Understanding the Sage
Chapter 1 Why You Are Here
Chapter 2 Developing The Sage’s Template™
Chapter 3 The Template in Action
Chapter 4 Self—The Physical Experience
Chapter 5 Self—The Energetic Experience
Chapter 6 Using The Sage’s Template™ to Master Your Life
Chapter 7 Speaking Your Truth—Embarking On Mastery
Chapter 8 Conclusion
Appendix A
Introduction
It’s been said in various incarnations through the years that we are the sum of our experiences. Author B.J. Neblett once wrote that, like a flowing river, those … experiences … continue to influence and reshape the person we are, and the person we become.
How many of us, though, take the time to not only consider and process our experiences, but to unravel the deeper meaning inherent to life’s vignettes? How many of us simply plow through life’s challenges without trying to reveal truths about those episodes—truths that have the potential to liberate us?
If I’ve learned anything during my own journey, it’s that the path of unfolding inner freedom is within everyone’s reach. But that first step, a step made with pure intention and awareness of what lies ahead, is often the most difficult.
The Journey of a Sage not only will help you take that step, but it will open doors you never knew were closed. It will help you live beyond your fears and all that limits you. It will allow you to master your life instead of floundering in its shadows.
How do I know? For more than 20 years, I’ve incorporated a tool that’s central to my practice and my teachings. The tool, which I named The Sage’s Template™, was developed throughout my own healing and the healing of others. Time and again, I’ve had the honor of watching people use The Sage’s Template™ to master their most crushing challenges, unveil their wisdom, and revel in the understanding it brings. All of us can heal in this life, but only if you’re willing and open to it.
Of course, for some, that’s easier said than done. Putting a mirror to one’s experiences, especially difficult ones, can be daunting. Trust me, I know. There have been times in my own life when the pain felt all-consuming and too much to bear.
For much of high school, I had no sense of belonging. I felt ugly and, at times, worthless. Like many young women, I first defined myself through a man. But what started as a blind date in high school evolved into an abusive relationship by the time I was in college. It took the help of several friends to safely pull me out of that situation.
Even amid the worst times, something inside told me to follow the pain. I didn’t understand why at first, and I wasn’t yet ready to follow through on this almost primal instinct. But the feeling gnawed at me, especially as a later relationship—and decade-long marriage—ended during graduate school.
My divorce came on the heels of an incident in grad school that already had stirred my old insecurities. As part of my doctoral program, students were asked to participate in group therapy—but with a catch. Instead of one consistent therapist, professors with varying theoretical orientations were asked to lead the sessions. As an aspiring therapist, I found the process fascinating. I wanted more out of life—and more out of myself—and these different philosophies were pushing me beyond my comfort zone in a good way.
Then, one day in group therapy, a moment of candor sparked a turning point in my life. The professor that day asked the group how they felt about me. The class, in turn, seemed to speak as one: There were times when they didn’t like me because they felt I was a know-it-all. The past had steamrolled into the present. The loneliness, the rejection, the absence of belonging—all of my deepest self-doubts came flooding back.
But something else happened that day and the days that followed. I followed the pain. I chose, willingly and with purpose, to lean into the uncomfortable reality of their perception. If I really wanted answers, I couldn’t walk away from a moment like this. Was I a know-it-all? Because of my insecurities, I certainly felt like I had something to prove. And yes, I was a bright student. At the time, intelligence was what I thought I had to offer the world. Maybe, the students were right. Maybe, it was far more complicated. But I could live with it. More importantly, I wanted to learn from it.
And so it began. It started with a simple, humble acknowledgement. Even in a challenging moment, the opportunity for continuing education exists. If you’re available to it. The more experiences I approached with that mindset, including the subsequent end to my marriage, the more doors that opened. The more I explored challenges by looking for the gifts within, the more I understood the truth of life unveiled.
Not long after graduate school, I started my private practice. My original practice was steeped psychoanalytic psychotherapy. But a few years in, my clients started asking different questions, questions that broke the ceiling of traditional psychology. They were curious about life beyond fear-based thoughts and surface-level feelings. It wasn’t just, Why did John cheat on me?
It was, Why am I involved in the same relationship over and over again?
How do I open up my relationships; they feel so limited.
Where do I find happiness?
My patients were leaning into their challenges, just I was in my life—and they were asking all the right questions. I soon found myself having access to answers. There was a synergy developing between my personal journey and my professional journey. Those early years with my patients helped to form the foundation of The Sage’s Template™.
This book represents the core of my teachings. Often, life’s truths are very simple, but the mastery of those truths requires us to walk toward the fire. All of us have inner wisdom just waiting to be tapped. But are we able to endure the pressure or the pain that comes with a life experience and find the deeper meaning of that episode? Furthermore, can you grow from it? And heal from it?
You can. And this book will help you discover how.
Lao Tse Tung (Laozi), Buddha, Christ and other enlightened souls knew that life mastery was attainable through willingness and belief. Indigenous people of many lands believed that injury and illness came from the internal imbalances with Self, Spirit, and Earth. They mastered life with the help of a medicine wheel.
The Sage’s Template™ incorporates several familiar philosophies and teachings, minus the medicine wheel, and combines them into an accessible blueprint, one that allows you to stay in the present while learning from the past.
You’ll begin to understand the purposes of different challenges in life. We’ll explore your Soulful Self and the external Other
factors that produce internal reactions. You’ll gain insights into your physical experience and your energetic experience. You’ll better understand love-based and fear-based emotions, and how those feelings are the language of the soul. You’ll learn that being out of tune can lead to illumination, and that transcending fear allows you to live in the greater truth: love.
It’s no secret that relationships define this lifetime, and communication defines relationships. The Template can lead to a style of communication that opens you to your soulful purpose, that guides you to growth in your relationships, as well as inner growth.
It’s through communication with Self
that you’ll learn to define the experiences you wish to have. It’s through the communication with Self that you will move through challenges and begin to love the company you keep. It’s through the communication of Self that you will become more present and in the now.
As you begin to live with compassion for Self, you also will live with compassion for others. As you begin to explore your Self, you will learn to explore others. Through the knowing and loving of Self, you will move into the awareness of The One and the infinite.
If none of this makes sense yet, trust me, it will.
The Sage’s Template™ is a tool that can assist you in growing beyond assumptions and expectations. It can guide you to the answers within that help you move beyond taking things personally. Imagine the empowerment that comes with being a confident observer of life—someone who can see an episode for what it is, feel it, process it, and, ultimately, find the wisdom in it—instead of someone who only reacts to an experience but never grows from it.
It’s time to lose your fears and discover the healing freedom that comes with life mastery.
Let the journey begin.
Preface: Understanding the Sage
In its role as an aromatic and sacred plant, sage has healing properties that date back some 4,000 years. Archaeological findings suggest that the ancient Egyptians used sage as everything from an embalming agent in Pharaonic tombs to a cure for infertility. In biblical lore, the sage plant willingly blossomed for the Virgin Mary amid a close encounter with King Herod’s soldiers, creating protective cover for Baby Jesus and his mother during their flight with Joseph to Egypt.
In the Middle Ages, sage became a cure-all for medicine men who used it, among other reasons, to rid the body of