How to Talk to Your Kids about Climate Change: Turning Angst into Action

Preface: This Book is for You

This book is for parents of newborns, first graders, middle schoolers, high school seniors, college students, and everyone in between. It is also for parents of children who themselves are adults, perhaps even with children of their own. This book is for you as you come to grips with the dire realities we face. Raising a child takes a village. Even if you are not a parent, you are part of the village. Thank you for reading this book and for not looking away. Thank you for seeking out answers and for deciding to jump in with both feet—or at least one foot—while you think about the next step for foot number two.

My hope is that this book will inspire and empower you to look for more information, to learn as much as you can, and to become actively involved—through a myriad of ways that make sense to you. By exciting your passions, your hopes, and your desires for a future in which our children not only survive but will thrive, you will keep going, do more, stay committed, and be resolved to make change. We must do all we can to ensure a livable and hopeful future for our children and for us. Our actions start today.

What This Book Does

This book will provide you with the science, the reality, the words, the ideas, and the support you are looking for as you build paths to navigate and live our climate emergency. It will also help you come to terms with the grief that accepting our climate crisis brings, while at the same time, it builds active hope and a shared life preserver we can all hold onto—with room for whoever wants to grab on.

This book will help you talk to the children in your life. It offers a wide range of ways to show you care, that you are taking action on their behalf, and that you hear their concerns and are working on ways to put the brakes on—to slow down and help change the collision course we are currently on. This book is written from my perspective; it includes my biases and is based on my background and experiences. It isn’t the definitive answer; nor is it the only way forward. It is, however, my best and most honest advice, gained from years of experience and from what I have seen, heard, and witnessed.

This book is not a list of or a resource of the top ten things you can do to save the planet. Those books abound. Find one, read it, and take action. None of the ideas you encounter here will be rocket science; nor are they untried, new, or revolutionary ideas—you shouldn’t expect them to be. Many of the ideas relate to viable and constructive solutions that you likely are already employing or have thought about instituting.

Nor is this book a statement or a position on the politics or integrity of the United States under the current administration, under administrations before this one, or under administrations to come. We must remember that the lack of cohesive and urgent action on the climate crisis didn’t begin with the Trump administration. As of the writing of this book, the climate crisis has never been acted on with the overriding urgency that our government or other national governments around the world have the power to command. There remains plenty of blame to go around.¹

What is becoming more evident as technology advances, as climate modeling becomes more precise, and as our planet reels from her inabilities to absorb and counteract the impacts of our assaults on her, is the reality of our direct role in causing our climate to change. Each year, as we learn we have met or exceeded another temperature, drought, rain, snow, or natural disaster record, humankind’s direct role in changing Earth’s climate and the ensuing climate chaos that is unfolding is becoming more evident and more apparent.

This book is my way of bearing witness to what is happening around us. Watching, sharing and witnessing our evolving climate crisis—full time—is my job. Whether the boulder moves up the hill, or sometimes slowly rolls back down, we are living climate change; this is our new normal.

Timing is Everything

The 2019, ten-year anniversary of ClimateMama, an organization I founded in 2009 to help parents learn more about our climate crisis, provided an opportune moment for me to stop and take stock, to look at where we have been, where we are headed, and where I think we should already be. The stories shared with you in the following pages, unless otherwise stated, are ones seen through my eyes. They are my experiences, told in my voice. They are my truth and my reality, unvarnished, as I have seen and experienced them.

This book also includes the voices, thoughts, ideas and advice of Climate Mamas and Papas from across the country and around the world; these are people I look up to, admire and trust. They all work in one way or another on finding solutions to our climate emergency—in support of and for their children and yours. I am honored and thrilled that they have shared their experiences and thoughts with me, so that I can share them with you.

On the occasion of my wedding, a friend who had traveled from afar to be with us told me she came because she wanted to be my witness to this milestone in my life. This book is my opportunity to bear witness in a public way, to share what I see, what I have seen, and what I have learned. It is also just a snapshot, a moment in time. As I have been watching, I have witnessed the clear acceleration of our climate crisis. When you read this, the facts themselves will be that much more obvious—as evidence of our climate crisis and our hand in causing it mounts and accumulates daily. As of 2018, with scientific reports giving a 2030 closing window for the ability to slow down our climate crisis, and with Greta Thunberg’s youth climate strikes giving rise to an international youth uprising, public outcry for immediate action is accelerating. Oddly, I think that advice about how we speak with and listen to our children’s hopes and concerns about our climate crisis will remain stable even as the seriousness of the crisis comes more sharply into focus.

I would suggest to you, as I often do to myself, to stop—even just for a few minutes—to meditate, to think deeply and to take stock of what is happening around us. Sit still and silent, let yourself feel the depth and weight of the crisis we have created, even as you recognize and accept how painful and difficult this is. Taking off your rose-colored glasses and truly seeing and understanding, even if only for a few moments, the enormity of the changes we, as a species, have imposed on our natural world is both terribly sad and awe inspiring; at the same time, it is incredibly humbling. We need to recognize and acknowledge what scientists have been telling us for decades with increasing authority. The destructive planetary forces that we—as a singular species—have been able to unleash in an incredibly short time span, are unique in the history of our planet.

There are deniers out there who continue to say we are too small and insignificant to make or create a planetary impact. Lately, there are also doomers on the other extreme; those who tell us it’s too late, that we are out of time, and that the damage we have wrought will destroy us all. The two groups are on opposite sides of the spectrum, but they are both trying to paralyze us. However, the vast majority of climate scientists—the experts who study what is happening and who are showing us we, indeed, are the ones changing our planet and our climate—are still encouraging us to act. They are reminding us we still have time: the door is still open. But at the same time, these climate scientists—as well as Mother Nature and our children—are working overtime to warn us that the door is spring loaded and closing rapidly. As protectors of our children, we are called to act now. We are the ones who are truly woke, and once awake, it’s impossible to ever truly sleep soundly again.

Coming to terms with our climate reality requires that we constantly move forward and act with the urgency our crisis demands. This doesn’t, however, mean neglecting to live life or failing to stop and smell the roses. After all, these roses have flourished because of our family experiences and the memories we are making with and for our children. For many of us, our children are why we are determined to go further and farther than we think we can. They are why we refuse to look away—why we are working so hard to find ways to accept and understand what is happening now, even as we force ourselves to acknowledge what will come if we do not act.

Our future and the future for our children can therefore seem very bleak. There is no denying this. But, it can also be filled with endless opportunities and new ways to become engaged, to take action and to get involved. We can choose to trust in our actions and those of millions of others who are working on and toward climate solutions, even as we recognize we can’t know for sure how things will turn out.

We must imagine the future we want, envisioning our hopes and our dreams. We must envision a future where climate change is a chronic condition, one we have figured out how to live with, one that is manageable and allows our children to thrive, not just survive. Our children are watching us; their present and future is truly in our hands. Let’s talk honestly with them about this—about the endless opportunities, about the active hope.

Let’s begin by telling our children the truth.

1

Introduction

Awakening to Our Climate Emergency

We will be coming to terms with the urgent realities

of our climate crisis for the rest of our lives.

We all need to get comfortable with this fact—

in a very uncomfortable way.

(Easier said than done…)

Each morning for a moment, as I gaze intently at my sleeping children resting in blissful peace, I am refilled with resolve and hope. I remind myself that it is my job to secure a safe and livable future for them and to ensure that they have the opportunity to grow into adults—to fight for their future as I now fight for my own and for theirs. Yet a game of chance is underway, with my children’s future the ultimate prize. Our house is literally on fire, from the Amazon to the Arctic Circle. We can smell the smoke and we can see the flames. There is still time to put the fire out, to save at least some of our belongings and maybe even the house itself, but we must act now. We are out of time.

Why won’t everyone wake up? The fire is burning hotter and hotter.¹

Dropping the Climate Change Bomb

I promise not to sugarcoat the truth. I will write as honestly and directly as I can. But, as David Wallace-Wells begins his book, The Uninhabitable Earth, It is worse, much worse than you think.² Wallace-Wells gives us the worst-case scenario: what will happen if we do nothing to curb our greenhouse gas emissions. Many feel Wallace-Wells’s assessment is fair; as of 2018, carbon emissions are climbing worldwide. It is an honest and clear assumption that we are headed in the wrong direction.³ Yet in most media markets around the world, the climate crisis gets little to no sustained attention, and the emergency we face is regularly downplayed. From my vantage point, I can see clearly that we are not yet on the path that leads to a livable future for our children. However, I do feel strongly that the path forward is visible and becoming clearer; it will be hard work, but it is within our reach.

I ask myself constantly: will our current and future actions be enough to spur our transformation, staving off the chaos that now seems close to inevitable? I honestly don’t know. No one can say for certain. There are so many forces working against us. At the top of the list is our own inability to fully comprehend the dire emergency we are actually living. Considering the money and power working overtime to keep us quiet and paralyzed, it is no wonder we remain mostly numb to the news that our sky is falling. Also, the reality is that we are often simply too overwhelmed by the demands of our everyday lives to dig in and work on solutions. Too many of us feel there isn’t anything that we, as individuals, can actually do that will effectively hold up our piece of the sky. As a result, we often tend to second guess what nature and science are telling us.

Doubt creeps in as we ask ourselves

•Are things really so bad?

•Climate chaos will impact my kids—really?

•Aren’t these problems still many generations away?

If we feel this way—unsure and doubtful—how will we be able to guide our children to find ways they can feel positive about their own future? How do we tell them the truth about our climate crisis and help move them to action when we aren’t sure how to rally ourselves? Our climate crisis—a crisis of our own making—is relentlessly enveloping our lives, our homes, our children’s health, our food systems, and our clean water resources. This is happening right now.

The two profound questions I believe we must honestly ask one another, and in all likelihood have already asked ourselves, are these:

1. Will we be able to cope, to adapt, to survive in the midst of this chaotic climate onslaught?

2. How will we maintain the strength and the determination to move forward and live our lives fully and with purpose as we live climate change and face the realities of each passing day?

The answers to these two questions are not clear; nor are they straightforward. Yet we need to come to terms with the answers if we are to be effective in talking to our children about climate change. A strong beginning is to acknowledge that living climate chaos—being alive in the Anthropocene⁴—is our reality. In certain places at different times each year, as extreme weather events wreak havoc, we know things have changed and we are living a new normal. Yet, at other times, as weather seems normal and reminds us of days from our youth, this new normal seems less certain. But we mustn’t fool ourselves or pretend we aren’t currently living a climate emergency. We are.

Why We Should Be Concerned

Since the year 2000, scientists around the world have begun using the term Anthropocene to describe our current geological time period: Anthropo, for man, and cene, for new. Not only did we enter a new millennium, we are in a new epoch. While there is still debate in the scientific world about the exact start date, more and more scientists feel strongly that we have left the Holocene, the epoch that our planet occupied since the last ice age, and we now have entered—whether we are ready for it or not—the age of man.

We humans are now more powerful than hurricanes, volcanoes, and tornadoes. We are able to change and alter the Earth’s ecosystems. We have forced our planet out of balance, and we are causing her to spin out of control. A single living organism now threatens the survival of almost all species on Earth—and that organism is us. This is unprecedented in the history of our planet.

I was born in the 1960s. The level of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere was already being tracked. It was evident to scientists that these levels were beginning to climb. At approximately 320 parts per million (ppm), the level of CO2 when I was born, we were still well within a safe range, and not too far from where the level of CO2 had been for over 800,000 years.

When I was young, we had terrible wildfires, downpours that flooded towns and cities, nor’easters, and hurricanes. New heat and cold