Who Did You See Today?: The Power of Outrageous Kindness

Table of Contents

Foreword

1: See People

2: Jesus Saw People

3: Value

4: Focus

5: Respond

6: Collective Sight

7: Obstructions

8: Now, Go

Notes

Copyright © 2024 by Dustin Schadt

All rights reserved.

Printed in the United States

978-1-4300-8553-9

Published by B&H Publishing Group

Brentwood, Tennessee

Dewey Decimal Classification: 259

Subject Heading: CHRISTIAN LIFE \ MINISTRY \ INTERPERSONAL RELATIONS

Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture references are taken from the English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

Scripture references marked

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are taken from the New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Scripture references marked

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are taken from the Christian Standard Bible. Copyright © 2017 by Holman Bible Publishers. Used by permission. Christian Standard Bible®, and CSB® are federally registered trademarks of Holman Bible Publishers, all rights reserved.

Scripture references marked

nlt

are taken from the New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Cover design by Matt Lehman. Image by Angelatriks/Shutterstock. Author photo by Katie Colucci.

To:

Jimmy and Kristin

Kevin and Lynette

Nat and Tracy Millican

Mike and Debbie Schadt

And so many others.

Thank you for seeing me.

Foreword

When I met Dustin Schadt, he was a college student at the University of Louisville. He was a baby Christian—a new believer who was eager to be discipled. He was energetic, interested, earnest, and intelligent. I was doing student ministry at a local church and had just started an evangelistic Bible study for fraternity and sorority students on Louisville’s campus. Dustin was one of the first guys to show up.

Over the next several years Dustin and I built a deep and meaningful friendship. We met one on one for discipleship. We memorized Scripture together. We shared Christ with hundreds and hundreds of students in U of L’s Greek system. We went on mission trips. I had the privilege of sharing the gospel with his girlfriend, April. She became a believer too.

Dustin and April spent time in our home, and my wife Kristin and I loved them both. They held our children, ate our food, and listened to our stories. I officiated their wedding, baptized April, helped them understand their call to ministry, and hired Dustin onto our church staff. I have taken tremendous joy in watching Dustin and April thrive in their marriage, work out their ministry calling, build their family, and grow their church. We have been friends for nearly twenty-five years. That’s a lot of years, a lot of laughter, a lot of tears, a lot of love, and a lot of conversations.

Dustin has always been good at seeing people. I noticed this quality when he was a young adult. Other guys his age considered him a good and faithful friend. When Dustin would invite them to an event, guys would come because they knew Dustin cared about them. Dustin has gotten older but his sense of connection to people hasn’t changed. When you are with Dustin, he always makes you feel like you are really important to him. He doesn’t hurry. He asks good questions. He is thoughtful in his follow-ups. All these qualities make him a good husband, a good father, and a good pastor. No wonder his church is thriving: Who doesn’t want a pastor like that? No wonder Dustin has a lot of deep friendships. Who doesn’t want a friend who sees them? All that makes him the perfect person to write a book like this.

I hope you will be challenged by this book, as I am. The people in your life need to be seen. And you should make the effort to see them. This kind of intentionality comes naturally to some people, but most of us have to work at it. My wife needs me to see her, my kids need me to see them, the people in my church need to be seen by me, and that doesn’t count the people that God is going to put in my path. Plus, I need people to see me too.

Writing a book is really hard, it is. It is like putting pieces of your heart on paper. When you read this book, you will be reading more than Dustin’s ideas—you will be reading Dustin’s heart. You will be encouraged to see people the way that Jesus sees people. And hopefully, you will feel the eyes of God seeing you.

—Jimmy

Jimmy Scroggins and his wife Kristin have been married for twenty-nine years and have eight kids and four grandkids. He is the lead pastor of Family Church—a multicultural, multigenerational, multisite church that meets in sixteen locations across three counties and four languages in South Florida. Jimmy has a MDiv and PhD from Southern Seminary in Louisville, Kentucky. Jimmy is the author of multiple books, including Full Circle Parenting, which he and Kristin wrote together.

1

See People

On a beautiful (and hot) day in the neighborhood, Mr. Rogers took a moment to remove his shoes and soak his feet in a small pool of water. Rogers then invited Francois Clemmons, the friendly neighborhood policeman, to soak his feet alongside him. Clemmons was the first African American to hold a recurring role on a national children’s program. They rested their feet together in the water and chatted about life. Mr. Rogers seemed to have a way of showing others their value. He drew in, focused, and responded to the individual people around him. Later, Clemmons said, Fred Rogers not only was showing my brown skin in the tub with his white skin, but as I was getting out of that tub, he was helping me dry my feet.¹

He was helping me dry my feet.

I think he was making a very strong statement, Clemmons said. And I discovered a friend for life. Journalist Tom Junod said in a reflection on Rogers, He practiced [kindness] like he practiced a musical instrument. I think he did the scales every day.²

• • •

Seeing people happens in countless everyday ways. Take, for instance, the time Sara’s life intersected with her local postal service worker. Sara is bright, fun, kind, and a terrific mother. When I asked Sara if I could share her story, she said, I don’t have a spectacular story to tell—we’ve just become friends as she’s grown to know me and my story and she knows I am a single mom like herself and has looked out for my son and me. One of the most beautiful things about Sara’s story is that she thinks it’s just ordinary. To Sara, it seems like something that you just do.

Do you know the name of the person who brings your mail? Sara sure does. Day after day, workers of the United States Postal Service visit nearly every person in the United States. In rain, sleet, and snow these tireless workers toil to bring birthday cards, junk mail, gifts, bills, and everything in between. They play a vital role in our communities, and each one of them has a story. To Sara, her postal worker isn’t just the mail lady. She is Marilyn. Over the course of thirteen years, Sara developed a dear friendship with Marilyn. On hot and humid Atlanta days, Marilyn could always count on Sara for a water, popsicle, or even lunch. Not only did Sara care for the person who brought the mail, but the mail lady also often ministered to Sara.

Upon Marilyn’s retirement, Sara’s whole neighborhood threw a party for their friend to honor this woman who had served them for many years. Kids painted signs celebrating Marilyn, this wonderful person they all came to know and love. I wonder how many days Marilyn drove through the neighborhood. How many pieces of mail did she deliver? How many rainy, hot, and even snowy days did she endure, hitting the brakes at each mailbox before accelerating to the next? It could be easy for a person and a neighborhood to forget, but this time, kindness and intentionality won the day.

Proverbs 11:25 (

niv

) says, A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed. Studies indicate that symptoms of struggling mental health are rising across individuals from every season of life, and especially among young people in our country. People feel unseen, depleted, and broken. The Lord is calling you and me to the people around us each day, to something so countercultural, unique, and powerful, that it just may make a dent in the sadness—He’s called us to see people.

The Power of Washing Feet

What does the most powerful man in the room do when he understands that he is the most powerful man in the room? For Jesus, it meant showing care and practicing humility. Jesus didn’t ask for service as the Son of God—instead, He served others. Jesus said in Matthew 20:28 The Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many. Jesus gave us a visual example of this service when He gathered at a large religious festival with His followers. The Scriptures tell us that Jesus loved His followers to the end (John 13:1). When we think about the love of Jesus for His followers, we might sometimes think His love lacked the affection that we often feel in our love. This simply isn’t true. Through the life of Jesus, He draws near in affection for His friends. He weeps at the death of a friend. He holds the hand of a little girl. He addresses a woman with a lifelong, debilitating, and embarrassing disease as a daughter.

Jesus knew His mission. He would endure temptation, give up Himself in death on a cross, and then rise victoriously from the grave. After a meal with His closest friends and followers, Jesus stood up, grabbed a towel, and tied it around His waist. Taking each of His friends’ feet into His own hands, He washed their feet. I can’t help but imagine the bewilderment of the group watching their leader stoop down to such a task, the task of a servant.

One of His closest followers rejected this offer, to which Jesus replied, If I don’t wash you, you have no part with me (John 13:8

csb

). If we zoom out a bit on the story, we also see in attendance Judas Iscariot, who for a handful of coins would betray Jesus and hand Him over to be killed. And Jesus washed his feet too. In a world where vengeance and violence often ruled the day, Jesus told and showed us how to love your enemies (Matt. 5:44).

We see people first not because we decide that they deserve to be seen. We see people because every single person in the entire world matters to our heavenly Father. We often say within the church family something like, As the Lord has been to us, so we will be to others. Maybe you’ve felt that kind of love. Maybe you’ve had someone draw their warm and inviting attention toward you. It seems when people spent time with Jesus, they felt like the only person in the room.

As children, we often had an adult place their focus on us. Maybe they sat on the floor with us, played a game, shared a meal, taught a math lesson, or showed us a skill. I’m sure you remember those childhood moments because they were meaningful to you. We never forget how good it feels to be seen and valued. Unfortunately, as adults we often go unseen and catch ourselves reflecting back to those long-ago moments when someone did see us.

But what if we could change that?

Tired from a long journey, Jesus sat down beside a well in the town of Samaria. As a Jewish man, Jesus would have had a history of strife to draw upon in relation to the Samaritan people. Jews and Samaritans held great animosity toward one another. As a woman from Samaria came to draw water, Jesus said to her, Give me a drink. It’s wild enough that a Jewish man would talk to a Samaritan, but further craziness that an upstanding religious man would engage in conversation with a woman known to make less than upstanding choices. Even Jesus’s friends were dismayed. But Jesus persisted. He showed the woman He indeed is living water, not just quenching the palate in a moment, but the one who hydrates the soul forever. Jesus knew the woman, her sin, and her shortcomings—yet He saw her. He slowed down. He drew in.

Jesus stooped down to us, just like He met the Samaritan woman right where she was. He walked the earth as 100 percent man and 100 percent God, at the same time. The Son of God, who created the stars in the sky and the waters of the sea, grew thirsty. He was tired, abandoned, beaten,