Episode 118: How To Talk So Your Teenager Will Listen

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Episode 195: The Fire and the Knife - Lessons From Father Abraham: Today we discuss one of the most unusual chapters in any parenting book. In the new edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" Dr. Ken includes a chapter titled "The Fire and the Knife - Lessons From Father Abraham." This is really a challenge for parents who are Christians or are practicing Jews at least. For parents who are serious about their faith, there can come points in the life of raising children that we are challenged with the incredibly hard choice, "who is more important to you, God or your child?" This was the choice that God gave Abraham and his choice shapes one of the great stories of faith in all of scripture. Knowing the right answer, for believers, can be the key to overcoming fear in parenting. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great J by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

18 min listen

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Episode 194: The Pros and Cons of Self-Awareness: Adolescents are more focused on their inner lives than ever before. But is this always a good thing? Jessica and Dr. Ken discuss yet another new chapter in the second edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You." It's not enough to encourage teens to know their own feelings. This focus needs to be balanced with genuine concern for others. When your teenager tells you she's depressed or that he's anxious, is there ever a time to minimize or even ignore their complaints. Today we take on these and other important aspects of adolescent self-awareness. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

25 min listen

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Episode 193: Keeping Marriage Alive When Your Teenagers Are Killing You!: When parents are busy raising children, a good marriage can seem like a luxury that they just don't have time for. Jessica and Dr. Ken argue that a good marriage is an essential part of raising healthy teens. As "Feeding The Mouth" parents know, adolescents need to be shown a path to their own emotional support and well-being. Marriage is not only essential for parents' emotional support but also important for you kids to see. How do parents deal with differences in parenting? We answer these and other important questions about marriage while raising teenagers. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

22 min listen

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Episode 192: Homeschooling and Teenagers: With the second edition of the "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" book, today we discuss the tricky balance of homeschooling adolescents. Homeschool families have changed significantly over the past few years and is a more popular choice than ever. Dr. Ken reminds parents of the important issue of "who's in control here?" in dealing with arguing teens. What circumstances are good to start homeschooling a teenager and which conditions are bad for that same choice? We cover these and other aspects of homeschooling teenagers. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

18 min listen

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Episode 191: Teenagers and Grandparents: Grandparents are often playing a larger part in the lives of their grandchildren than in the past. Most grandparents are popular with their grandkids when they're young, but what about during the teenage years? Today we discuss how understanding "Feeding The Mouth" principles can improve a grandparent's relationship with teenage grandchildren. Not surprisingly, Dr. Ken recommends being careful to respect your grandkids' parents (your own kids) even if you disagree with their parenting. What should a grandparent do when their teenage grandchild complains about their parents? Is it bad that my teen grandkids still like me making them cookies and generally babying them? Should grandparents have their own communication line with a teenage grandkid (e.g. texting, DMing etc.)? We answer these and other questions about having the best relationship with your grandchildren even through the teenage years. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth T by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

28 min listen

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Episode 190: Adult Children Living at Home: There are many circumstances when adult children need to live at home. Some parents think Planned Emancipation means that's a bad thing. It isn't. Today we discuss the advantages and pitfalls of adult kids at home. What should parents pay for? What do you do when your adult kid doesn't help out around the house? Is it a good thing when parents and their adult kids become each other's best friend? We answer these and other important questions. Spoiler alert: It's not THAT an adult child is living in your home but why and for how long. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

24 min listen

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Episode 189: Adoption, Foster Care and Teenagers: Today Jessica and Dr. Ken take on the issues related to teenagers who are adopted or are in foster care. Adolescence often brings up issues of identity and origin stories that can be upsetting to parents who have poured themselves into the lives of their teenagers. Dr. Ken suggests that adoptive and foster parents focus more on Planned Emancipation goals even when there's a strong impulse to slow this process down. We also focus on realistic goals that adoptive parents can maintain in order to fully appreciate their experience as parents of "chosen" kids. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

20 min listen

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Episode 188: Great Communication With Teenagers: What does great communication with teens really look like and how can parents achieve that? Dr. Ken and Jessica outline the aspects of the parent-teen relationship that usually cause trouble in communication (spoiler alert: control battles). Also we discuss the more nuanced issue of what great communication with adolescents should really look like. Should parents really have the goal of being so close to their adolescents that "we talk about everything"? Are there even times when a parent should actually tell their teenager, "I don't think you should be telling me this"? Is it a good goal for parents to want to be their teenagers' constant "go to" relationship through the trials of adolescence? You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavid by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

25 min listen

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Episode 187: When Planned Emancipation Doesn't Work: Parents some times complain that they "tried" planned emancipation and it "didn't work." Today we talk about the common reasons for planned emancipation not seeming to have the impact parents expected. This is all covered in the new edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You." You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

22 min listen

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Episode 186: Planned Emancipation - Second Edition: As we prepare for the release of the second edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You," Jessica and Dr. Ken talk about the power of planned emancipation. This method is often mistaken for the practice of rewarding children's good behavior with more privileges. Planned emancipation, by contrast, recognizes the greater freedom that comes with just getting older. Parents who fearfully try to hang on to control end up weakening their influence on their adolescents. You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

28 min listen

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Episode 185: Teaching Parents To Release The Burden of Parenting: In the second edition of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You," Dr. Ken explains why he added an entire chapter on the issue of burdened parents. We discuss the difficulty of providing information for parents while avoiding the appearance of having an "inside scoop" to guarantee happy, successful teenagers. You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

18 min listen

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Episode 184: Refocusing On Individuation - The Main Thing To Know About Teenagers: We're getting ready for the release of "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" second edition. This gives Jessica and Dr. Ken the chance to clarify the most important themes that are unique to this approach to parenting adolescents. Today we review individuation which is the most important need that adolescents have by far. This need is so important that Dr. Ken even worries that if your teen doesn't seem to be pushing for autonomy that's not a good thing at all. Also, we take on common misperceptions like individuation is "just like when they were a 2 year old." WRONG! You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

20 min listen

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Episode 183: When Parents Are Suffering: This was a tough episode. When parents are struggling with serious illness or other types of suffering, how should they handle their adolescent kids? Jessica talks about her own, recent diagnosis of multiple myeloma cancer and how it has impacted her adolescent and adult children. Dr. Ken talks about his wife's cancer battle 20 years ago when their children were young. There's a significant difference in how parents should deal with their kids when they are young vs. adolescents. In suffering, parents truly show their faith. You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

26 min listen

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Episode 182: Inside Out 2: Today we talk about Pixar's big summer movie "Inside Out 2" in which the star, Riley, becomes a teenager. Although a really funny movie, Dr. Ken had a fair amount to complain about how we think about the inner life of teenagers. Jessica enjoyed it and so did her 13 year old daughter. Maybe Dr. Ken is just being a curmudgeon. You decide! You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

26 min listen

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Episode 181: "The Anxious Generation": Today we talk about Jonathan Haidt's new book, "The Anxious Generation." He is a social psychologist and co-author of the book "The Coddling Of The American Mind." This new book reviews massive amounts of research and delivers what Dr. Ken thinks is a "slam dunk" answer to the debate about whether smartphones are damaging to the lives of children and adolescents. We discuss the concerning data and how smartphones, social media and pornography have contributed to significant increases in adolescent levels of anxiety and depression. As you can guess, we also talk about effective ways to delay and limit smartphone access while still inviting your teenager into the discussion and maintaining a path to autonomy. You can get "The Anxious Generation" book here: https://a.co/d/gvfk0JY You can preorder Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! podcast@feedingthemou by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

31 min listen

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The Big Announcement: The Revised and Expanded, 2nd Edition of the Feeding Book Is Here!: The second edition of the "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" book will drop on November 5th! Dr. Ken finally finished the work of updating and expanding the Planned Emancipation message. Listeners of this podcast will recognize the new material covered in the book since they are many of the topics we talked about on this podcast over that past four seasons including: - anxiety and depression - ADHD, Autism-spectrum disorders and neurodiversity - brain science and trauma - sexuality and gender identity - single parents - divorce and blended families - adoption - adult children at home - grandparents and teenagers Today we review how the new book is laid out and the new topics this second edition will cover. Of course, this new edition lays out the basic understanding of transitioning adolescents into full adulthood and all the "how-to's" that parents have relied on since publication of the first by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

35 min listen

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Episode 179: We're Going On Break Plus A BIG Announcement!: We're taking the summer off after our fourth season! Plus... Dr. Ken has a big announcement that will interest all "Feeding The Mouth" parents when we get back. See you in the fall! by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

3 min listen

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Episode 178: Bad Therapy - Part Two: Today we finish up our discussion of Abigail Shrier's book, "Bad Therapy." We take on her more wide-ranging critiques of psychotherapy's influence on schools and parenting. Are schools overstepping when they start monitoring the mental health of their students? When did parenting become a specialized technique for the psychologically trained few. When did parents lose confidence in simply raising their children the same way their parents raised them? We take on these and other issues related to Abigail Shrier's book, "Bad Therapy." Ms. Shrier's book can be found here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CK524HQ7/ Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1514762374/ Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

25 min listen

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Episode 177: Bad Therapy - Part One: If you haven't read Abigail Shrier's book, "Bad Therapy" you probably should take a look. Ms. Shrier's critique of an over-psychologized culture and the negative effects of poorly applied therapeutic methods is a timely warning for parents. Dr. Ken doesn't agree with all her conclusions but, as you'll see, there's plenty of very important cautions for parents considering taking their kid to therapy. This is part one of a two part (rather long) discussion. Ms. Shrier's book can be found here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CK524HQ7/ Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1514762374/ Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

41 min listen

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Episode 176: Stepparents and Teenagers: Stepparents can play a powerful role in the lives of children. But dealing with teenagers is a very different matter. Even if you've been in your stepkids' lives for years, the onset of adolescence can change how they see their relationship to you. Dr. Ken talks about the importance of stepparents taking an honest inventory of how the teenager sees them and the ineffectiveness of stepparents unilaterally expecting a teen's acceptance regardless of the circumstances of how they came into the teenager's life. We also review the power that stepparents have and can play in the lives of their stepchildren and much more. Listen if you are a stepparent or if you know someone who is. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent - h by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

22 min listen

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Episode 174: Cellphones and Teens - Another Update!: By far the number one question parents ask about is managing cell phones. Just when you think you've set some guidelines they go right out the door. What's the best age to allow cell phones? Does Dr. Ken still recommend allowing complete freedom with these things at some point? We cover these and other important things to review with these stupid devices including some thoughts on parents' own usage of cellphones. Dr. Ken references the "Wait Until 8th" campaign - https://www.waituntil8th.org/ Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

19 min listen

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Episode 174: Marriage Problems, Separation, Divorce and Teenagers: How should parents deal with teenagers when they're having marriage problems? What are the real effects of divorce on teenagers? When and how much should parents talk to their teens about marriage problems or when considering divorce? Today Jessica and Dr. Ken take on these questions and more. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

20 min listen

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Episode 173: Teenagers and Religion - Church, Synagogue, Mosque or Temple: Today we revisit the issue of passing on your own religious priorities to your teenagers. Since the pandemic, attendance at religious services is down significantly among Americans of all faiths. Among Christians, a significant percentage believe that watching church online is equal to church attendance. This drop in regular church or synagogue participation brings a unique challenge to parents who want to influence the faith of their adolescent children. Additionally, we talk about whether parents should require teenagers to attend activities designed for youth when they'd rather just go to service with their parents, what if they tell you they don't even believe in God? We cover these and other aspects of teenagers and faith. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

21 min listen

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Episode 172: Porn and Anime Revisited: It's been awhile since we talked about pornography and issues surrounding it. Jessica is also worried about anime. Are these two related? Should parents be worried about animated porn images as well as live action videos and images? What is hentai anyway? What is the impact of trying to "lock down" a teenager's access to porn vs. the impact of open communication? We take on these and other issues surrounding harmful, sexually related imagery. Dr. Ken makes reference to Cindy Gallop's book "Make Love Not Porn." It appears this is no longer available. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

26 min listen

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Episode 171: We Interview Cynthia Yanoff... Your New Best Friend: Today we talk to Cynthia Yanoff, host of the "MESSmerized" podcast, former host of the "Pardon the Mess" podcast and author of her new book, "Life is Messy, God is Good: Sanity for the Chaos of Everyday Life." Always relatable, Cynthia's book shares stories and lessons learned from the vantage point of a wife, mom, former lawyer, foster parent and Christian woman just trying to keep things together. Her honesty and genuine interest in everyone around her draws people to her like a magnet, including Jessica and Dr. Ken, Cynthia is the new best friend that you just met! You can order Cynthia's book here: https://www.amazon.com/Life-Messy-God-Good-Everyday/dp/0830785337/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&dib_tag=se&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.FpO-LuS7Ai5oyZNB81l-7asYYzhZFnYyOGIopmyTzVALHajKoWGLDx1gXtl_5wCBSxDJIjJ6xZzU1tF6kjWfpsfc6cs1SFbC-JWwRAwxtVR4e-mJ32SSOHicPhIUHjcVkU4jANzkzVa3SH4JtNabgqqAoPA3PaGf0UY79_TDUcbpxAS0wGJbaXwCSunISCHy2 by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

24 min listen

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Episode 170: Sociosexuality Part Two: This week we finish our discussion on teens and sociosexuality - an individual's interest in sexual behavior without commitment. Dr. Ken reviews the need to help our daughter's understand the normal differences between male and female sociosexuality. We review the importance of talking to your teens about these differences even though you're sure to get "eye rolls" from a generation that believes everything is about individual differences. Dr. Ken references the following books: "The Case Against the Sexual Revolution" - Louise Perry https://www.amazon.com/Case-Against-Sexual-Revolution/dp/1509549994/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&dib_tag=se&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.VQOg_8sw7jb9T-0fFt9KZCudi7AKKInduM-ES9xPDq4fecfnh-xyNUH5_mErzn25V8VZYfgsM40B8bBbH0MuZhUwKGHw8iio8lGPnP9w9PaGdBFZ4oItBrySGW5vLIDLCjre-SlUEoGFvNOECO56WaFPtxp2nJLX9oLy5mLvIkEMw7ynbQ_h5i2DIATK-wsBpllOsL5fjdYk8yo-xeXjDiKARLptoz3P0SShYQrx8So.BPByX1Va2VbaA8yOQ_1T61tIS9n2pE1ZYKrP3SkfAus&qid=171 by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

15 min listen

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Episode 169: Sociosexuality Part One: Are men and women different in their sexual drives and needs? Popular culture seems insistent on portraying men and women's sexual interests as the same. In psychology research, an individual's desire and interest in casual, sexual interaction is known as sociosexuality. This has been studied worldwide and surprise surprise, there are consistent differences between males and females in their levels of sociosexuality. Today is the first part of an important discussion on how to talk to our girls and boys about these differences and the implications this has on how young men and women interact, regardless of ideological insistence otherwise. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

16 min listen

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Episode 168: Neurodiversity And Teenagers: What is neurodiversity and what does it mean to be neurodivergent? Today we talk about this broad category that covers autism-spectrum conditions as well as deficits in attention and other cognitive, learning issues. Why is neurodiversity becoming a popular term? Is this a useful category for our kids? Jessica and Dr. Ken talk about the possible drawbacks to this category. Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Get the book here: https://www.amazon.com/Feeding-Mouth-That-Bites-You/dp/1514762374/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1667269257&sr=8-1 Music provided by the great John David Kent! - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

16 min listen

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Episode 167: "Lost In Trans Nation" Dr. Miriam Grossman Interview (Part Two): Today we share the second half of our interview with Dr. Miriam Grossman. Grossman is a board certified psychiatrist who has been educating parents about the misinformation that has all but hijacked the fields of psychiatry, psychology and virtually all other human sciences. Dr. Grossman’s practice currently focuses on gender-distressed young people and their parents. She believes that every child is born in the right body. Dr. Grossman is the author of five books and has been translated into eleven languages. She testified before Congress and lectured at the British House of Lords. You might have seen her interview in the documentary "What Is A Woman?" Be careful when ordering her book as there have been efforts by some to interfere with getting the right book. Best to order from here: https://www.miriamgrossmanmd.com/about-4-2 Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

15 min listen

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Episode 166: "Lost in Trans Nation" We Interview Dr. Miriam Grossman MD (Part One): We are so excited to have one of our heroes join us for an in-depth look at the ideology of gender diversity that is sweeping our country. Dr. Miriam Grossman is a board certified psychiatrist who has been educating parents about the misinformation that has all but hijacked the fields of psychiatry, psychology and virtually all other human sciences. Dr. Grossman’s practice currently focuses on gender-distressed young people and their parents. She believes that every child is born in the right body. Dr. Grossman is the author of five books and has been translated into eleven languages. She testified before Congress and lectured at the British House of Lords. You might have seen her interview in the documentary "What Is A Woman?" We are honored to present this first of a two part discussion. Be careful when ordering her book as there have been efforts by some to interfere with getting the right book. Bes by Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

16 min listen

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Episode 118: How To Talk So Your Teenager Will Listen

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