Rabid Husker Fan, Husband, Father and CEO at Strategy. We empower our clients through strategic marketing and technology solutions.
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I came across this quote recently: “Losses loom larger than gains.” In other words, people will fight harder to avoid a loss than to realize a gain.
It’s human nature. We often fight to keep the things we have rather than let go to gain something more valuable. We do it in relationships, with material goods and in business. When is the last time you held onto something that kept you from something better? When is the last time you tried to help someone who just couldn’t let go of what they were holding onto, but you knew that if they would just surrender, their life would be so much better?
It reminds me of the scene in “Lord of the Rings” where Gollum cries out for his “precious” even though it was ultimately corrupting him and destroying his true nature. We all have our “preciouses”; we are typically blind to them and their lack. However, we can generally see those “precious” things that others are holding onto. We need one another to help us see what we hold that causes a lack in our lives and holds us back from better things.
As you’re working with people and trying to help them do something new, realize that hesitation may be related to this principle. People fear the new. New is risky. Doing something new often means we have to admit that we were wrong or the thing we chose wasn’t a good choice. No one likes to admit they were wrong (it’s why people keep throwing money at broken systems or solutions versus just starting anew). They can’t let go of the original investment.
If someone is fighting hard, it might be because they are avoiding loss. Help them see a brighter future. In order to have a brighter future, you often have to give up what is comfortable and known. How do we make this a “safe” experience? Often we are moving too fast to consider what is going on in the minds and hearts of the people we’re working with. We just want to swoop in and swoop out. Listening and understanding take significant time and effort. However, if you are truly concerned about making a change, it’s going to take time to create a safe experience for real adoption. Are you rushing change? People who are holding tight to their “precious” must be willing to open their hands to release. You can’t just snatch it from their tight grasp without causing irreparable harm.
Now to get personal: What are you fighting hard to avoid loss? What do you need to give up so that you can have a greater gain? Once you see your own “precious” and the lack that it causes in your life, you’ll be more apt to trade up.
Eight months ago, I gave up Netflix for books. I gave up sleeping in for waking up at 5 a.m. I’ll never look back — best decisions of 2021 for me! You often can’t get to great if you hang onto good. Let go and experience the better in 2022!
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