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Who We Are #1
Should the Sky Fall
After a terrible accident, most people would spend day and night at their husband's side, praying for him to pull through. To wake up.
Dawson isn't most people. Then again, it's not unreasonable to want to be rid of the man who's made your life a living hell for the past six years.
Except when Cal wakes up, he's nothing like the man who'd put bruise after bruise on Dawson's body and shattered his soul. Cal has no memory of any of that. He remembers nothing, including his own name.
Dawson should walk away. Cal might not remember, but Dawson does. He remembers everything. By all rights, he should run and never look back.
What he absolutely should not do is start falling for him, for this man who wears his husband's face but feels like home, not like someone Dawson should fear.
It might make him the most horrible person on the planet, but if Dawson had one wish, he'd wish for Cal's memories to never come back.
For trigger warnings , please refer to the book sample or the author's website.
Dawson isn't most people. Then again, it's not unreasonable to want to be rid of the man who's made your life a living hell for the past six years.
Except when Cal wakes up, he's nothing like the man who'd put bruise after bruise on Dawson's body and shattered his soul. Cal has no memory of any of that. He remembers nothing, including his own name.
Dawson should walk away. Cal might not remember, but Dawson does. He remembers everything. By all rights, he should run and never look back.
What he absolutely should not do is start falling for him, for this man who wears his husband's face but feels like home, not like someone Dawson should fear.
It might make him the most horrible person on the planet, but if Dawson had one wish, he'd wish for Cal's memories to never come back.
For trigger warnings , please refer to the book sample or the author's website.
506 pages, Kindle Edition
First published July 22, 2023
About the author
Amithia Raine
4 books162 followersI'm your regular anti-social weirdo who loves to escape reality by getting way too invested in the lives of fictional dudes, be it through reading or writing.
I was born and raised in the Czech Republic. In 2019, I ran away to Brisbane, Australia, where I made camp and have no plans on changing that. In real life, I'm a physiotherapist, and a coffee and sugar addict. In my other (way more interesting) life, I'm a sap who can't survive without two (or more) boys in love and a proper happily ever after.
I was born and raised in the Czech Republic. In 2019, I ran away to Brisbane, Australia, where I made camp and have no plans on changing that. In real life, I'm a physiotherapist, and a coffee and sugar addict. In my other (way more interesting) life, I'm a sap who can't survive without two (or more) boys in love and a proper happily ever after.
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July 26, 2023
4**** stars
The cover alone looks so damn intriguing, right? And believe me, it makes more sense than you know. *lol And to all my friends and lovers of slow-burn, this one’s for you! ♡
Do you remember these 90s movies Rendezvous mit Joe Black and City of Angels? That’s the vibe I got. The blurb of the book is a bit misleading for the reader because there isn’t really an amnesia-trope in here. But amnesia is what everyone thinks it is as Cal doesn’t have any memories. And I feel free to tell you this because it’s basically revealed in the prologue already and the author put a very telling tag on the book herself. #reaperinlove
While this is a super sweet love story, the very first part of the book is not easy to read. Abuse never is. So please heed TWs.
And now imagine, after many horrible years and you being finally ready to throw divorce papers at him, you suddenly find your abusive husband in a hospital after an almost fetal accident and he remembers nothing. Not his life, not his family, his work and not you —and all the awful things he did to you. And he’s nice. And considerate. And, I dare say, unexpectedly cute? He’s practically a totally different person. (Dawson suspects an alien abduction) SO WHAT THE HELL DO YOU DO NOW????
I tell you what Dawson did. He took Cal home and cared for him and hoped LIKE HELL that Cal’s memories will never ever come back and he’ll be safe.
To sum up my feelings I’d say: This is a fantastic story, a really great idea and absolute worth reading and written well, but… maybe that’s just me not being much into watching characters doing every-day-stuff to get to know each other to this extend and maybe it was even necessary for this kind of story but I feel like this book could’ve been way shorter, the story more compressed, paced a little faster, you know? It dragged hard for a while there in the middle part.
But really, for a debut this was really good !
I’m looking forward to Gabe’s and Ellis’s story, there is something mysterious about Gabe as well and both characters intrigued me in here already. And I hope Ash gets a book too, his personality thrills me even more.
*Please check TWs!
*************
Who We Are Series
Book 1 - Should the Sky Fall - 4.0 stars
Book 2 - Should our Hearts Catch Fire - release end of 2023
The cover alone looks so damn intriguing, right? And believe me, it makes more sense than you know. *lol And to all my friends and lovers of slow-burn, this one’s for you! ♡
Do you remember these 90s movies Rendezvous mit Joe Black and City of Angels? That’s the vibe I got. The blurb of the book is a bit misleading for the reader because there isn’t really an amnesia-trope in here. But amnesia is what everyone thinks it is as Cal doesn’t have any memories. And I feel free to tell you this because it’s basically revealed in the prologue already and the author put a very telling tag on the book herself. #reaperinlove
“Soon, you’ll be free. He won’t hurt you anymore. I promise you.”
While this is a super sweet love story, the very first part of the book is not easy to read. Abuse never is. So please heed TWs.
And now imagine, after many horrible years and you being finally ready to throw divorce papers at him, you suddenly find your abusive husband in a hospital after an almost fetal accident and he remembers nothing. Not his life, not his family, his work and not you —and all the awful things he did to you. And he’s nice. And considerate. And, I dare say, unexpectedly cute? He’s practically a totally different person. (Dawson suspects an alien abduction) SO WHAT THE HELL DO YOU DO NOW????
I tell you what Dawson did. He took Cal home and cared for him and hoped LIKE HELL that Cal’s memories will never ever come back and he’ll be safe.
To sum up my feelings I’d say: This is a fantastic story, a really great idea and absolute worth reading and written well, but… maybe that’s just me not being much into watching characters doing every-day-stuff to get to know each other to this extend and maybe it was even necessary for this kind of story but I feel like this book could’ve been way shorter, the story more compressed, paced a little faster, you know? It dragged hard for a while there in the middle part.
But really, for a debut this was really good !
I’m looking forward to Gabe’s and Ellis’s story, there is something mysterious about Gabe as well and both characters intrigued me in here already. And I hope Ash gets a book too, his personality thrills me even more.
*Please check TWs!
*************
Who We Are Series
Book 1 - Should the Sky Fall - 4.0 stars
Book 2 - Should our Hearts Catch Fire - release end of 2023
June 22, 2024
Wow. Just WOW. That's all I got.
Go into this book blind.
The first few chapters are dark and confusing, but carry on, because everything will change soon.
The third-person present tense narration took me a second, but the author knows how to write and weave a story, so I stopped noticing after a while.
Should the Sky Fall is about the worst and best of human nature, hatred to love turned, and soulbonds that can't be frayed.
It's about donuts and Donut the dog, cooking lessons, and messages on coffee cups.
Riveting. Complex. Hopeful.
Five hundred plus pages and not a word wasted.
Go into this book blind.
The first few chapters are dark and confusing, but carry on, because everything will change soon.
The third-person present tense narration took me a second, but the author knows how to write and weave a story, so I stopped noticing after a while.
Should the Sky Fall is about the worst and best of human nature, hatred to love turned, and soulbonds that can't be frayed.
It's about donuts and Donut the dog, cooking lessons, and messages on coffee cups.
Riveting. Complex. Hopeful.
Five hundred plus pages and not a word wasted.
October 28, 2023
4.25/5
This book definitely exceeded my expectations. I went blindly because I've been in a reading slump lately and I dnfed too many books, but I was surprised at how much I enjoyed it. All I knew was that the book would have an amnesia trope. I'm not the biggest fan of this particular trope, but this book took it to another, more interesting level. I predicted the plot twist, because it was quite obvious, but it didn't change anything for me as I ended up loving the book.
About the story. The book is about Dawson, whose life took an unexpected turn. After six years of marriage to an abusive husband, one situation finally makes him realize that he can't live like this anymore and decides to divorce him. Unfortunately, fate has other plans, because the day he decides to show his husband the divorce papers, Cal gets into a car accident and wakes up as a completely different person with no memories of his life. His personality couldn't be more different from the man made his life a living hell for six years, so Dawson reluctantly decides to give him a chance to see what happens. The more he gets to know him, the more he likes this new version of Cal, who treats him like he's his whole world. Dawson must decide whether he wants to stay or leave because his new husband may not be who he thinks he really is.
The main characters were such sweethearts and thought they won’t be in my 'favorite book characters' category, I still had fun reading their story. The beginning of the book is quite slow, although there is a lot going on, but after Cal wakes up, the story focuses on them getting to know each other, so the romance the main focus here. It’s a slow burn, but trust the the burn it’s burning. I thought there will be no spice here, but it turned out I was wrong. The scenes were hot, so it’s worth the wait.
There’s a few side characters, which will definitely get a book and I’m so excited to read it. Especially, Ash and Ellis. Ellis will be paired with Gabe and I have a feeling their book will be amazing. Ellis is a grumpy "straight" CEO and Gabe is a sunshine bakery owner. I hope Ash gets his own book too. He is a funny/weird therapist and I already like him. I can't wait to read the next books!
This book definitely exceeded my expectations. I went blindly because I've been in a reading slump lately and I dnfed too many books, but I was surprised at how much I enjoyed it. All I knew was that the book would have an amnesia trope. I'm not the biggest fan of this particular trope, but this book took it to another, more interesting level. I predicted the plot twist, because it was quite obvious, but it didn't change anything for me as I ended up loving the book.
About the story. The book is about Dawson, whose life took an unexpected turn. After six years of marriage to an abusive husband, one situation finally makes him realize that he can't live like this anymore and decides to divorce him. Unfortunately, fate has other plans, because the day he decides to show his husband the divorce papers, Cal gets into a car accident and wakes up as a completely different person with no memories of his life. His personality couldn't be more different from the man made his life a living hell for six years, so Dawson reluctantly decides to give him a chance to see what happens. The more he gets to know him, the more he likes this new version of Cal, who treats him like he's his whole world. Dawson must decide whether he wants to stay or leave because his new husband may not be who he thinks he really is.
The main characters were such sweethearts and thought they won’t be in my 'favorite book characters' category, I still had fun reading their story. The beginning of the book is quite slow, although there is a lot going on, but after Cal wakes up, the story focuses on them getting to know each other, so the romance the main focus here. It’s a slow burn, but trust the the burn it’s burning. I thought there will be no spice here, but it turned out I was wrong. The scenes were hot, so it’s worth the wait.
"Now that he knows what it’s like, he can’t imagine a life where he’s not completely, utterly, hopelessly in love with the man in front of him."
There’s a few side characters, which will definitely get a book and I’m so excited to read it. Especially, Ash and Ellis. Ellis will be paired with Gabe and I have a feeling their book will be amazing. Ellis is a grumpy "straight" CEO and Gabe is a sunshine bakery owner. I hope Ash gets his own book too. He is a funny/weird therapist and I already like him. I can't wait to read the next books!
February 7, 2024
⭐️ 4.5 stars ⭐️
I decided to reread so I could update my review with a complete content list. And I’m so glad I did, I love Cal and Dawson’s story.
Should the Sky Fall is a lovely, emotional romance, with themes of healing and building trust.
Except for a few moments, the vibe is very sweet and cutesy, filled with adorable domestic scenes, where the characters slowly fall for each other.
I do wish the paranormal side was a little more developed, it being most present in the last quarter.
Hopefully the author expands on it in the next book, because the concept is extremely fascinating, but it was definitely lacking depth in this installment.
CW and tropes (spoilers):
- Abusive relationship
- Graphic depiction of rape and abuse
- Domestic abuse
- Themes of alcohol addiction
- Mention of a car accident
- Second chance (?)
- MC with amnesia
- Reaper vs human
- Strict top/bottom
- Rimming
Original review:
Amazing debut novel!
I’d describe Should the Sky Fall as a romance with paranormal aspects woven into it. The building of the relationship between Cal and Dawson is definitely the main focus, with many scenes of domestic fluff and sweetness. The amnesia and hurt/comfort just added layers of depth to the story that made it a fantastic and emotional read.
Can’t wait for more!
«He doesn’t know who he is, but he’ll be whoever Dawson needs him to be.»
I decided to reread so I could update my review with a complete content list. And I’m so glad I did, I love Cal and Dawson’s story.
Should the Sky Fall is a lovely, emotional romance, with themes of healing and building trust.
Except for a few moments, the vibe is very sweet and cutesy, filled with adorable domestic scenes, where the characters slowly fall for each other.
I do wish the paranormal side was a little more developed, it being most present in the last quarter.
Hopefully the author expands on it in the next book, because the concept is extremely fascinating, but it was definitely lacking depth in this installment.
«If it isn’t happy, it’s not the end.»
CW and tropes (spoilers):
- Abusive relationship
- Graphic depiction of rape and abuse
- Domestic abuse
- Themes of alcohol addiction
- Mention of a car accident
- Second chance (?)
- MC with amnesia
- Reaper vs human
- Strict top/bottom
- Rimming
Original review:
Amazing debut novel!
I’d describe Should the Sky Fall as a romance with paranormal aspects woven into it. The building of the relationship between Cal and Dawson is definitely the main focus, with many scenes of domestic fluff and sweetness. The amnesia and hurt/comfort just added layers of depth to the story that made it a fantastic and emotional read.
Can’t wait for more!
April 29, 2024
Book safety, content warnings, and tropes down below.
“Sometimes it’s hard to let go of the only thing you know, even if that thing hurts you or doesn’t make you happy. You don’t know any better, so you don’t even bother trying.”
It’s a bit silly that I waited this long to read this book, and for no other reason than it was recommended too many times and my brain went ‘well now I’m not gonna do it!’, but here we finally are. It was a beautiful book with a concept I never could’ve thought up myself, so it gets stars on originality alone. And other stuffs.
Somehow, in spite of the abuse and sad setting, it’s a funny and mostly lighthearted story, in my opinion. I expected it to be angsty, but other than one particularly sad scene it wasn’t bad at all. To me, anyway.
He always thought that when people in books describe heartache like someone reaching into their chest and crushing it with their fist, they are being overly dramatic. He doesn’t anymore.
I don’t really have a lot of feelings about Dawson. He’s a good character, don’t get me wrong. He was put in horribly difficult situation and somehow fought his way out of it, healing himself. The fact that he could be vulnerable and fall in love after enduring what he did is incredible. Cal on the other hand is probably the cutest, most himbo-ish character I’ve read in ages. He is absolutely clueless about most things for large parts of the book, which was adorable and made me expel breath slightly harder out of my nose a couple times while reading (twas funny).
This book also has a pretty big, fairly epic plot twist, which I honestly forgot is supposed to be a twist because I’ve known about it for months, lol (addicted to spoilers).
So yes, while serious, absolutely tragic in some ways, and just plain sad in others, it was also a funny love story with tons of butterfly inducing moments between the main characters. It’s an incredible story with a twist you’ll want to experience.
I really struggled with the 3rd person present tense for a long time as I’ve never actually read that before, as well as it being a bit too long for me at the moment, but don’t let that affect your decision to read it or not. It was worth the time it took!
If it isn’t happy, it’s not the end.
⬇️ Blanket spoiler warning ⬇️
⚠️ Tropes & tags ⚠️
Paranormal elements
Size difference
Age gap
Past (and present) trauma
Himbo vibes
Slow burn
Therapy
Retrograde amnesia
⚠️ Content warning ⚠️
MC raped on page by current husband (not other MC, detailed)
Domestic abuse (between MC and side character):
Physical abuse (on page)
Sexual abuse (on page)
Psychological and verbal abuse (on page)
Controlling and manipulative behavior
Explicit sexual content
Mentions of the death of parents (off page, past)
Side character severely injured in car crash (off page)
Side character driving under the influence (off page)
Self-deprecating jokes/casual suicidal jokes
Alcoholic side character (intoxicated on page)
Medical emergency (MC experiencing heart attack)
MC hospitalized
*none of the abuse occurs between MCs
⚠️Book safety ⚠️
Cheating: No
Other person drama: No
Breakup: Sort of, briefly
POV: 3rd person, dual
Genre: Mostly contemporary romance
Pairing: M/M
Strict roles or versatile: Strict roles
Main characters’ age: 26 and ‘a few eons’
Series: Interconnected standalone
Kindle Unlimited: Yes
Pages: 506
He’d give anything to make sure Dawson’s soul shines again. He’d give anything to show Dawson how much he deserves to be loved. Utterly, completely. He’d give anything.
“I really wish I could remember you,” he says, meaning every word. “I don’t really care if I remember anything else, but you… I want to remember you.”
“Cal can still get his marbles together and return to work.” “Yeah, I don’t think that’s going to happen,” he says carefully. “Why?” Ellis asks, suspicious. How to put this… “Let’s say the marbles have scattered in all directions.”
You can find most of my reviews on Instagram as well: https://www.instagram.com/booksafety?...
“Sometimes it’s hard to let go of the only thing you know, even if that thing hurts you or doesn’t make you happy. You don’t know any better, so you don’t even bother trying.”
It’s a bit silly that I waited this long to read this book, and for no other reason than it was recommended too many times and my brain went ‘well now I’m not gonna do it!’, but here we finally are. It was a beautiful book with a concept I never could’ve thought up myself, so it gets stars on originality alone. And other stuffs.
Somehow, in spite of the abuse and sad setting, it’s a funny and mostly lighthearted story, in my opinion. I expected it to be angsty, but other than one particularly sad scene it wasn’t bad at all. To me, anyway.
He always thought that when people in books describe heartache like someone reaching into their chest and crushing it with their fist, they are being overly dramatic. He doesn’t anymore.
I don’t really have a lot of feelings about Dawson. He’s a good character, don’t get me wrong. He was put in horribly difficult situation and somehow fought his way out of it, healing himself. The fact that he could be vulnerable and fall in love after enduring what he did is incredible. Cal on the other hand is probably the cutest, most himbo-ish character I’ve read in ages. He is absolutely clueless about most things for large parts of the book, which was adorable and made me expel breath slightly harder out of my nose a couple times while reading (twas funny).
This book also has a pretty big, fairly epic plot twist, which I honestly forgot is supposed to be a twist because I’ve known about it for months, lol (addicted to spoilers).
So yes, while serious, absolutely tragic in some ways, and just plain sad in others, it was also a funny love story with tons of butterfly inducing moments between the main characters. It’s an incredible story with a twist you’ll want to experience.
I really struggled with the 3rd person present tense for a long time as I’ve never actually read that before, as well as it being a bit too long for me at the moment, but don’t let that affect your decision to read it or not. It was worth the time it took!
If it isn’t happy, it’s not the end.
⬇️ Blanket spoiler warning ⬇️
⚠️ Tropes & tags ⚠️
Paranormal elements
Size difference
Age gap
Past (and present) trauma
Himbo vibes
Slow burn
Therapy
Retrograde amnesia
⚠️ Content warning ⚠️
MC raped on page by current husband (not other MC, detailed)
Domestic abuse (between MC and side character):
Physical abuse (on page)
Sexual abuse (on page)
Psychological and verbal abuse (on page)
Controlling and manipulative behavior
Explicit sexual content
Mentions of the death of parents (off page, past)
Side character severely injured in car crash (off page)
Side character driving under the influence (off page)
Self-deprecating jokes/casual suicidal jokes
Alcoholic side character (intoxicated on page)
Medical emergency (MC experiencing heart attack)
MC hospitalized
*none of the abuse occurs between MCs
⚠️Book safety ⚠️
Cheating: No
Other person drama: No
Breakup: Sort of, briefly
POV: 3rd person, dual
Genre: Mostly contemporary romance
Pairing: M/M
Strict roles or versatile: Strict roles
Main characters’ age: 26 and ‘a few eons’
Series: Interconnected standalone
Kindle Unlimited: Yes
Pages: 506
He’d give anything to make sure Dawson’s soul shines again. He’d give anything to show Dawson how much he deserves to be loved. Utterly, completely. He’d give anything.
“I really wish I could remember you,” he says, meaning every word. “I don’t really care if I remember anything else, but you… I want to remember you.”
“Cal can still get his marbles together and return to work.” “Yeah, I don’t think that’s going to happen,” he says carefully. “Why?” Ellis asks, suspicious. How to put this… “Let’s say the marbles have scattered in all directions.”
You can find most of my reviews on Instagram as well: https://www.instagram.com/booksafety?...
July 19, 2023
4.5 ★★★★☆
I really really loved the concept of this whole story with the amnesia part and the reaper, Dawson just such a kind person, he stays with him even with all of the things he's gone through with Caledon and I'm glad the reaper takes over and gives him a brand new Cal who makes him Happy, which makes them both equally happy.
This was a pretty solid story for a debut, The Romance, The Angts just the right amount, and The fluff so many of them, I didn't expect Cal to be so sweet ☹☹ he's just so precious and everything feels natural around them, like how their relationship moves forward after the accident, all their banter and food fights 🥺🥺 please more of that!!!
Also everyone around Dawson is so likeable except for Caledon of Crouse, Kieran, Gabe, Ash, Zeke, Olivia, and Ellis ( can't wait for his story tho) and also donut lol can't forget about him too.
My only little complaint is that
I'm kinda bored when we reached to the middle of the story cause we're moving a bit slow and still follows the same routine and also we're only a few pages in but there's so many characters already sometimes I couldn't keep up with the names but thankfully I did at the end.
This was a lovely story overall.
*I received an ARC for this book, and I'm leaving an honest review voluntarily
I really really loved the concept of this whole story with the amnesia part and the reaper, Dawson just such a kind person, he stays with him even with all of the things he's gone through with Caledon and I'm glad the reaper takes over and gives him a brand new Cal who makes him Happy, which makes them both equally happy.
This was a pretty solid story for a debut, The Romance, The Angts just the right amount, and The fluff so many of them, I didn't expect Cal to be so sweet ☹☹ he's just so precious and everything feels natural around them, like how their relationship moves forward after the accident, all their banter and food fights 🥺🥺 please more of that!!!
Also everyone around Dawson is so likeable except for Caledon of Crouse, Kieran, Gabe, Ash, Zeke, Olivia, and Ellis ( can't wait for his story tho) and also donut lol can't forget about him too.
My only little complaint is that
I'm kinda bored when we reached to the middle of the story cause we're moving a bit slow and still follows the same routine and also we're only a few pages in but there's so many characters already sometimes I couldn't keep up with the names but thankfully I did at the end.
This was a lovely story overall.
*I received an ARC for this book, and I'm leaving an honest review voluntarily
January 15, 2024
this is so cute and endearing and most of it is like a warm hug. except the beginning. take the tws very seriously.
it’s definitely not perfect, i would’ve liked if we developed the last part a little bit more and we definitely need a clearer definition of the paranormal here. however i enjoyed this so much that i can’t help but round it up to 5 stars.
baby cal is such a cutie pie and dawson called me a heartless bitch in 62826 different languages but i honestly love being in the head of people totally different from me, it’s always so interesting.
i do realize that this is as useful as a fork to eat soup, but bear with me and trust me and read! this! you can scream at me later if you don’t like it.
it’s definitely not perfect, i would’ve liked if we developed the last part a little bit more and we definitely need a clearer definition of the paranormal here. however i enjoyed this so much that i can’t help but round it up to 5 stars.
baby cal is such a cutie pie and dawson called me a heartless bitch in 62826 different languages but i honestly love being in the head of people totally different from me, it’s always so interesting.
i do realize that this is as useful as a fork to eat soup, but bear with me and trust me and read! this! you can scream at me later if you don’t like it.
August 5, 2023
fabulous book for a debut novel!!
I applaud for the author. The writing and the plot was great and the characters are interesting! I enjoyed and recommend it.
The sub gender is a borderline of the mystical reality and urban fantasy, but I think it’s more like the first. It gave an amazing twist and a real hea. It also has some spice and good one! The reason it’s not 5 stars is that sometimes I felt Cal’s character too child like, and it was hard to put him in a romantic relationship, considering the mystical aspect, it made sense, but still. Looking forward to the next book by the author.
I applaud for the author. The writing and the plot was great and the characters are interesting! I enjoyed and recommend it.
The sub gender is a borderline of the mystical reality and urban fantasy, but I think it’s more like the first. It gave an amazing twist and a real hea. It also has some spice and good one! The reason it’s not 5 stars is that sometimes I felt Cal’s character too child like, and it was hard to put him in a romantic relationship, considering the mystical aspect, it made sense, but still. Looking forward to the next book by the author.
September 11, 2023
3.5 ⭐️
The beginning was very rapey :/ read CWs.
I only started to catch up to the story at 26%. sad. I was unimpressed in the beginning and was really confused on what was going on. Gladly, the writing was ok for me to keep going and I inhaled this in one sitting. Some things I liked; the paranormal touch near the end, it was somewhat satisfying. I also enjoyed their sweet sentimental moments together.
I don’t rate this higher as the execution of this story wasn’t that appealing to me. While the anticipation of this book was substantial and a major reason for my continuous reading, I was almost frustrated and confused as I eagerly awaited the story to unfold, making it difficult for me to connect with the characters’ guilty moments. It was a disorienting reading experience for me.
I also had a few highs and lows reading this. some part felt entertaining, and some part had me skimming. In terms of the amnesia trope, this book didn’t delve deeply into the medical and psychological aspects, which I usually enjoy exploring. However, I did appreciate the sentimental elements it brought to the story. After analyzing how this book ends, I’d say the amnesia was pretty unrealistic overall, but understable.
Overall, it didn’t wow me and I feel like I’m missing out on something.
The beginning was very rapey :/ read CWs.
I only started to catch up to the story at 26%. sad. I was unimpressed in the beginning and was really confused on what was going on. Gladly, the writing was ok for me to keep going and I inhaled this in one sitting. Some things I liked; the paranormal touch near the end, it was somewhat satisfying. I also enjoyed their sweet sentimental moments together.
I don’t rate this higher as the execution of this story wasn’t that appealing to me. While the anticipation of this book was substantial and a major reason for my continuous reading, I was almost frustrated and confused as I eagerly awaited the story to unfold, making it difficult for me to connect with the characters’ guilty moments. It was a disorienting reading experience for me.
I also had a few highs and lows reading this. some part felt entertaining, and some part had me skimming. In terms of the amnesia trope, this book didn’t delve deeply into the medical and psychological aspects, which I usually enjoy exploring. However, I did appreciate the sentimental elements it brought to the story. After analyzing how this book ends, I’d say the amnesia was pretty unrealistic overall, but understable.
Overall, it didn’t wow me and I feel like I’m missing out on something.
July 29, 2023
3.5 stars rounded up.
This one started SO GOOD and I was super hopeful that it was gonna be a 5-star standout this month. But alas .. it didn't. I still enjoyed it immensely though!
Let's start with the good:
Great idea for a plot.
Loved the paranormal aspect of the plot
Adored Cal and Dawson kinda dating again. They were so sweet and so romantic.
Loved that Cal doesn't keep the Pnr aspect to himself. I was worried that he would never tell Dawson.
Great plot development and I could really feel the difference between old and new Tal.
The not so good:
The book was TOO LONG. It started out amazingly and I was sucked it right from the beginning but around the 50% mark the book dragged alot and I started skimming because it felt like many scenes were repeating themselves. I felt like I lost some steam along the way and that made the second half of the book kind of slow for me.
A bit of inconsistencies here and there concerning the PNR aspect and how Cal knew some things but not others. It needed a bit more tightening up imo.
Overall, I really enjoyed this book and the author's writing style and I'm excited for more in this world.
This one started SO GOOD and I was super hopeful that it was gonna be a 5-star standout this month. But alas .. it didn't. I still enjoyed it immensely though!
Let's start with the good:
Great idea for a plot.
Loved the paranormal aspect of the plot
Adored Cal and Dawson kinda dating again. They were so sweet and so romantic.
Loved that Cal doesn't keep the Pnr aspect to himself. I was worried that he would never tell Dawson.
Great plot development and I could really feel the difference between old and new Tal.
The not so good:
The book was TOO LONG. It started out amazingly and I was sucked it right from the beginning but around the 50% mark the book dragged alot and I started skimming because it felt like many scenes were repeating themselves. I felt like I lost some steam along the way and that made the second half of the book kind of slow for me.
A bit of inconsistencies here and there concerning the PNR aspect and how Cal knew some things but not others. It needed a bit more tightening up imo.
Overall, I really enjoyed this book and the author's writing style and I'm excited for more in this world.
Shelved as 'dnf'
October 23, 2023| DNF |
The plot had a great potential, but after a point, it started to feel like the book was all about unnecessary details. This made it impossible for me to connect with the characters.
The plot had a great potential, but after a point, it started to feel like the book was all about unnecessary details. This made it impossible for me to connect with the characters.
December 22, 2023
3/5
(MAYBE? SPOILERS AHEAD)
this story was a lot fluffier than i expected considering the dark themes it touches on. but although it started off really strong, i'm sad to admit that it lost my interest fairly quickly. it took me forever to finish; i'd go days in-between reading and eventually realized that i kept coming back to it because i wanted to finish it, not because i wanted to know what would happen next. i kept checking how much was left and fighting the urge to dnf.
it’s honestly a shame—the story had a lot of potential, the writing was decent, and there were some really heartwarming moments between the MCs sprinkled throughout.
unfortunately, said writing was hindered by the addition of lots of filler and unnecessary details, which made the story draaaag at parts.
imo, there were a lot of irrelevant scenes and uninteresting dialogues that didn't move the plot forward or give the reader any new information, and therefore could've easily been omitted. it got to the point where i'd skim conversations with side characters (mainly ones involving kieran, gabe, and zeke; i truly did not care about a single one of them, and they had so many dialogues 😭) just to get back to the meat of the story.
i didn't mind dawson's character. as the author often reminds us throughout the book, he's the type of person who puts others before himself. him joining the pretend tea party with his four-year-old nieces at the start even though he had a terrible migraine stood out to me as particularly heartwarming and indicative of his kind nature. for the most part, his struggle to come to terms with a seemingly brand new husband came off as realistic. and even though his therapy session scenes with ash were mind-numbingly boring (sorry not sorry), i do appreciate that they were included to show that he used it as a method of working through his internal struggles. but tbh, i could've settled for summaries of their sessions rather than having to sit there with them and hear dawson rehash everything we witnessed happen three paragraphs ago.
cal (the new cal, obv) was most definitely the highlight of this book for me. his character was just so wholesome and endearing and precious and thoughtful. everyone deserves a caring and attentive partner like him in their life.
the things he'd say were cute af. he could definitely be overly martyr-ish at times, but i think his feelings were pretty understandable given his extremely unique and bizarre situation.
i found the limits to hisamnesia knowledge about various things to be slightly inconsistent; he'd know what one thing was, but then be completely clueless as to another in a way that didn't completely make sense. instances involving the latter would spur engrossing scenes like dawson teaching cal step-by-step how to use a washing machine and set it to a specific cycle 😍. like i said earlier... some things probably could've been left out.
now, to address the elephant in the room...
some quibbles: this is just a personal pet peeve, but the author's overuse of the word "giggle" to describe the laughter of grown men grated on me a bit. it’s almost certainly just me, but i've always viewed "giggle" as having a childish/immature connotation, so it felt kind of out of place. the dick painting thing that was brought up again and again wasn’t particularly funny to me the first few times, let alone the next fifty. also, dawson having magic psychic friends with superpowers that allow them to sense otherworldly entities (?) was… definitely convenient.
also, a tidbit of information i was curious about that i feel was sort of skimmed past: were readers ever really told why dawson liked cal and married him in the first place? it supposedly wasn’t because of his wealth, but we're told that cal wasn't exactly the perfect husband at the beginning of their relationship either, so i'm left stumped as to what dawson saw in him and why he agreed to marry him. my guess is that he was manipulated into it or felt pressured to say yes, but i don't remember either of those being explicitly mentioned. it's possible an explanation was given, but i can't really be bothered to go back and search for it.
and, i'm ngl... dawson saying the phrase “The past three days were a hundred times worse than the past six years” to cal after being apart from him was kind of crazy when he spent the last six years getting physically, emotionally, and verbally abused, r*ped, and manipulated... and the past three days were spent in bed bingeing stranger things and eating fruit loops.
i get that the author was trying show readers how much dawson missed cal, but holy shit... that line was overkill and a tad insensitive if you ask me.
i will say that was a great touch. the explanation behind the cover image in the epilogue was also moving—i love the various layers of symbolism behind it. and i don’t always comment on sex scenes, but i really enjoyed the ones in this story. they were so emotional and heartfelt, which did make it feel like "making love" (as the MCs referred to it) rather than just getting off/fucking like intimate scenes feel in so many other m/m books.
to sum things up, this story had some really great ideas, but the overall execution was just meh. i liked ellis’ character well enough, but gabe didn't really do anything for me, so i don't think i’ll be tuning in for the upcoming sequel that centers around their romance.
(MAYBE? SPOILERS AHEAD)
this story was a lot fluffier than i expected considering the dark themes it touches on. but although it started off really strong, i'm sad to admit that it lost my interest fairly quickly. it took me forever to finish; i'd go days in-between reading and eventually realized that i kept coming back to it because i wanted to finish it, not because i wanted to know what would happen next. i kept checking how much was left and fighting the urge to dnf.
it’s honestly a shame—the story had a lot of potential, the writing was decent, and there were some really heartwarming moments between the MCs sprinkled throughout.
unfortunately, said writing was hindered by the addition of lots of filler and unnecessary details, which made the story draaaag at parts.
imo, there were a lot of irrelevant scenes and uninteresting dialogues that didn't move the plot forward or give the reader any new information, and therefore could've easily been omitted. it got to the point where i'd skim conversations with side characters (mainly ones involving kieran, gabe, and zeke; i truly did not care about a single one of them, and they had so many dialogues 😭) just to get back to the meat of the story.
i didn't mind dawson's character. as the author often reminds us throughout the book, he's the type of person who puts others before himself. him joining the pretend tea party with his four-year-old nieces at the start even though he had a terrible migraine stood out to me as particularly heartwarming and indicative of his kind nature. for the most part, his struggle to come to terms with a seemingly brand new husband came off as realistic. and even though his therapy session scenes with ash were mind-numbingly boring (sorry not sorry), i do appreciate that they were included to show that he used it as a method of working through his internal struggles. but tbh, i could've settled for summaries of their sessions rather than having to sit there with them and hear dawson rehash everything we witnessed happen three paragraphs ago.
“I can feel it, you know?”
Dawson blinks. “Feel what?”
“How important you are to me. How much you mean to me.” Dawson’s speechless, his mouth agape and confusion written in his features. “I might not remember it here—” Cal touches his temple, then moves his finger to the center of his chest. “But I remember it here.”
cal (the new cal, obv) was most definitely the highlight of this book for me. his character was just so wholesome and endearing and precious and thoughtful. everyone deserves a caring and attentive partner like him in their life.
“You are everything to me,” he says with ardency that shakes Dawson. “So I need you to do this for me, okay? One last thing.” His hands tremble when they cradle Dawson’s face, so gentle, like he’s something precious and fragile. “I want—I need you to be safe. I need you to be happy.” He holds Dawson’s gaze. “Even if it’s not with me.”
the things he'd say were cute af. he could definitely be overly martyr-ish at times, but i think his feelings were pretty understandable given his extremely unique and bizarre situation.
i found the limits to his
now, to address the elephant in the room...
some quibbles: this is just a personal pet peeve, but the author's overuse of the word "giggle" to describe the laughter of grown men grated on me a bit. it’s almost certainly just me, but i've always viewed "giggle" as having a childish/immature connotation, so it felt kind of out of place. the dick painting thing that was brought up again and again wasn’t particularly funny to me the first few times, let alone the next fifty. also, dawson having magic psychic friends with superpowers that allow them to sense otherworldly entities (?) was… definitely convenient.
also, a tidbit of information i was curious about that i feel was sort of skimmed past: were readers ever really told why dawson liked cal and married him in the first place? it supposedly wasn’t because of his wealth, but we're told that cal wasn't exactly the perfect husband at the beginning of their relationship either, so i'm left stumped as to what dawson saw in him and why he agreed to marry him. my guess is that he was manipulated into it or felt pressured to say yes, but i don't remember either of those being explicitly mentioned. it's possible an explanation was given, but i can't really be bothered to go back and search for it.
and, i'm ngl... dawson saying the phrase “The past three days were a hundred times worse than the past six years” to cal after being apart from him was kind of crazy when he spent the last six years getting physically, emotionally, and verbally abused, r*ped, and manipulated... and the past three days were spent in bed bingeing stranger things and eating fruit loops.
i get that the author was trying show readers how much dawson missed cal, but holy shit... that line was overkill and a tad insensitive if you ask me.
i will say that was a great touch. the explanation behind the cover image in the epilogue was also moving—i love the various layers of symbolism behind it. and i don’t always comment on sex scenes, but i really enjoyed the ones in this story. they were so emotional and heartfelt, which did make it feel like "making love" (as the MCs referred to it) rather than just getting off/fucking like intimate scenes feel in so many other m/m books.
Cal’s lips are on his in an instant, warm and forceful as they forbid him to say another word. “Everything,” Cal mumbles, winding his arms around Dawson’s waist. “You’re everything I ever wanted.”
to sum things up, this story had some really great ideas, but the overall execution was just meh. i liked ellis’ character well enough, but gabe didn't really do anything for me, so i don't think i’ll be tuning in for the upcoming sequel that centers around their romance.
August 30, 2023
Y"ALL! I am shaking over this book. I have so many feelings, let me try to get through it.
Amazon recommended this book to me THIS MORNING and the cover drew me in so I said why not. This was the best decision. This book is beautiful, emotional, and dark with good times and laughs and trials and tribulations. Also, this has light paranormal activities going on, which is perfect because I am not into the paranormal or magic world but this was a perfect dose. TW: Domestic abuse and sexual assault on the page.
This book follows Dawson and Cal. Dawson is married to Caledon who abuses him on the regular. Dawson decides to leave him but the day he decides to leave Caledon gets into a car accident. What Dawson does not know is that a soul reaper has fallen in love with him and has taken over Caledon's body, therefore, becoming Cal which begins a beautiful love story.
I was on the edge of my seat throughout the whole book because I was so fascinated by how this story will work itself out and how these two would end up together. I think it brought up good conversations about abuse and how that can change a person but also what you do when the person who was slowly killing you also uses love to bring you back to life. It was like night and day reading about these two because you are screaming for Dawson to leave and find help at the beginning of the book and then to watch him fall in love with this new person was beautiful. They really worked with each other to make this work and to understand this new relationship
I just loved every moment of this book, through the good and rough times. I could not recommend it enough, it blew my expectations out of the water. This is 100 percent on my top-read list. I cannot wait for book two.
Amazon recommended this book to me THIS MORNING and the cover drew me in so I said why not. This was the best decision. This book is beautiful, emotional, and dark with good times and laughs and trials and tribulations. Also, this has light paranormal activities going on, which is perfect because I am not into the paranormal or magic world but this was a perfect dose. TW: Domestic abuse and sexual assault on the page.
This book follows Dawson and Cal. Dawson is married to Caledon who abuses him on the regular. Dawson decides to leave him but the day he decides to leave Caledon gets into a car accident. What Dawson does not know is that a soul reaper has fallen in love with him and has taken over Caledon's body, therefore, becoming Cal which begins a beautiful love story.
I was on the edge of my seat throughout the whole book because I was so fascinated by how this story will work itself out and how these two would end up together. I think it brought up good conversations about abuse and how that can change a person but also what you do when the person who was slowly killing you also uses love to bring you back to life. It was like night and day reading about these two because you are screaming for Dawson to leave and find help at the beginning of the book and then to watch him fall in love with this new person was beautiful. They really worked with each other to make this work and to understand this new relationship
I just loved every moment of this book, through the good and rough times. I could not recommend it enough, it blew my expectations out of the water. This is 100 percent on my top-read list. I cannot wait for book two.
August 14, 2023
4.5/4.75 stars (i can't decide) for a lil PNR mm romance action. i don't know shit about Meet Joe Black and had to google it after seeing the comparisons of that to this. it's not a gay romance and therefore i'm not interested despite a 90s Brad Pitt taking the lead. all that aside, this was noooiiceee. it's unique considering most of the mm romance i read and i was here for it.
Dawson is a battered husband, to put it lightly. Caledon has him walking on egg shells, isolated from loved ones, and completely financially dependent on him. he's given up his love of art and having a puppy; his entire existence culminating around taking care of his very rich, very evil husband who he met when he was 20 and has a 12 year age gap between them. red alert.
the reaper is introduced right away so there's no magic twist, the reader has eyes wide open from the jump. this reaper was assigned to Caledon and his fury is righteous when he sees the way Dawson is treated. (there is on-page alcohol and domestic abuse and spousal rape.) on a night when Dawson's leash is loosened just a notch so he can visit his sister, he comes down with a crippling migraine and is unable to make his curfew resulting in a pretty ugly scene when he returns home to his husband. the reaper witnesses the scene and is drawn to Dawson's soul even in the midst of his pain and he makes a vow to save D and make his husband suffer.
the sexual assault becomes the pivoting moment that incentivizes Dawson to finally leave Caledon and file for divorce. his plans are laid to hell when the same day, Evil Incarnate gets into a car accident while driving drunk and winds up hospitalized in a coma. the reader is well aware of what happens next with the reaper soul snatching tf out of Caledon and then body snatching him too. when Cal comes to, homie has full blown amnesia. neither he nor Dawson have any idea that Cal isn't Caledon.
Cal wakes up remembering nothing but his love for Dawson. while Dawson struggles with his memories, he is aloof at best but suffers under the guilt of dealing with his now amnesiac husband needing to recover from his accident. the Cal he is faced with is nothing like the Cal he was ready to divorce. as days and weeks go by, this new and improved Cal is entirely different than the man who had Dawson under his thumb and delighted in exerting his control over him. instead, there's a child-like wonder and eagerness in Cal that charms and endears him to Dawson. despite the peanut gallery of Dawson's friends and family trying to warn him away from Cal, D can't help but fall for his husband (really for the first time) anyway.
Cal is obsessssed with Dawson, okay. it haunts him to hear about who he was before the accident but no one tells him anything apart from the side comment here and there that allude to the previous problematic asf behavior. he also has minor flashbacks in the form of dreams where he sees Dawson in pain and bloodied, but Dawson avoids discussing any of this when Cal tries to bring it up. the juxtaposition between the two versions of C is substantial though, so i don't really blame him for wanting to avoid the topic. where Caledon was a workaholic with barely a moment to spare for his husband, hardly any couple photos to speak of in 6 years of marriage, no cooking skills to speak of, and an alcohol in his coffee type bitch, Cal loves Disney movies and teenie bopper vampire romance books. he's got a sweet tooth like nobody's business, he doesn't like the thought of working his old job, and he is all too happy to get a dog with Dawson so they have an audience for all the meals he wants to make for husband. he is wildly adorable and nothing like Caledon from before. so much so, that when he stumbles across the divorce papers and finds out the truth of Dawson's husband, he is sick with it.
but they're in love and when Cal finally does get his memories back, it gets kinda weird? we go almost the entire book without much in the way of anything paranormal besides a couple of side characters giving little hints of their own abilities. so it's almost jarring to be reminded that Cal is the reaper and not Caledon at all. but if the love of your life who used to beat your ass comes up and tells you "it wasn't me, it was the last guy who owned my body" you'd be at least MILDLY suspish as hell too. cue the teardrops on my guitar because DawDaw gets the hell out of dodge, assuming Cal is unhinged and not actually just an innocent little reaper baby who fell in love with him before he even had a name of his own. awww. anyway, Dawson's therapist/some kind of supernatural being that isn't disclosed in this book + Gabe the barista/another supernatural being with empath abilities, come to the rescue and send Dawson back home to Reaper Daddy. i just love a happy ending.
the relational angst is pretty low and the spice doesn't show up until 75% in, but there's still like 4 or 5 decent scenes shoved in to that last bit. i LOVED the premise, loved the execution, loved the relationship building. it's written in second person which i struggle with because i like to highlight blue and orange from diff pov, but you can still tell who is getting emphasized in the chapter based on the feelings and thoughts being described. i'm fucking STOKED for Cal's "straight" "brother" Ellis to get knocked on his ass by Gabe in the next book. i nearly shipped him with Dawson when he makes his first appearance until i realized what the fuck i was reading and got myself together. who knew i needed gay paranormal romance in my life? not me!
Dawson is a battered husband, to put it lightly. Caledon has him walking on egg shells, isolated from loved ones, and completely financially dependent on him. he's given up his love of art and having a puppy; his entire existence culminating around taking care of his very rich, very evil husband who he met when he was 20 and has a 12 year age gap between them. red alert.
the reaper is introduced right away so there's no magic twist, the reader has eyes wide open from the jump. this reaper was assigned to Caledon and his fury is righteous when he sees the way Dawson is treated. (there is on-page alcohol and domestic abuse and spousal rape.) on a night when Dawson's leash is loosened just a notch so he can visit his sister, he comes down with a crippling migraine and is unable to make his curfew resulting in a pretty ugly scene when he returns home to his husband. the reaper witnesses the scene and is drawn to Dawson's soul even in the midst of his pain and he makes a vow to save D and make his husband suffer.
the sexual assault becomes the pivoting moment that incentivizes Dawson to finally leave Caledon and file for divorce. his plans are laid to hell when the same day, Evil Incarnate gets into a car accident while driving drunk and winds up hospitalized in a coma. the reader is well aware of what happens next with the reaper soul snatching tf out of Caledon and then body snatching him too. when Cal comes to, homie has full blown amnesia. neither he nor Dawson have any idea that Cal isn't Caledon.
Cal wakes up remembering nothing but his love for Dawson. while Dawson struggles with his memories, he is aloof at best but suffers under the guilt of dealing with his now amnesiac husband needing to recover from his accident. the Cal he is faced with is nothing like the Cal he was ready to divorce. as days and weeks go by, this new and improved Cal is entirely different than the man who had Dawson under his thumb and delighted in exerting his control over him. instead, there's a child-like wonder and eagerness in Cal that charms and endears him to Dawson. despite the peanut gallery of Dawson's friends and family trying to warn him away from Cal, D can't help but fall for his husband (really for the first time) anyway.
Cal is obsessssed with Dawson, okay. it haunts him to hear about who he was before the accident but no one tells him anything apart from the side comment here and there that allude to the previous problematic asf behavior. he also has minor flashbacks in the form of dreams where he sees Dawson in pain and bloodied, but Dawson avoids discussing any of this when Cal tries to bring it up. the juxtaposition between the two versions of C is substantial though, so i don't really blame him for wanting to avoid the topic. where Caledon was a workaholic with barely a moment to spare for his husband, hardly any couple photos to speak of in 6 years of marriage, no cooking skills to speak of, and an alcohol in his coffee type bitch, Cal loves Disney movies and teenie bopper vampire romance books. he's got a sweet tooth like nobody's business, he doesn't like the thought of working his old job, and he is all too happy to get a dog with Dawson so they have an audience for all the meals he wants to make for husband. he is wildly adorable and nothing like Caledon from before. so much so, that when he stumbles across the divorce papers and finds out the truth of Dawson's husband, he is sick with it.
but they're in love and when Cal finally does get his memories back, it gets kinda weird? we go almost the entire book without much in the way of anything paranormal besides a couple of side characters giving little hints of their own abilities. so it's almost jarring to be reminded that Cal is the reaper and not Caledon at all. but if the love of your life who used to beat your ass comes up and tells you "it wasn't me, it was the last guy who owned my body" you'd be at least MILDLY suspish as hell too. cue the teardrops on my guitar because DawDaw gets the hell out of dodge, assuming Cal is unhinged and not actually just an innocent little reaper baby who fell in love with him before he even had a name of his own. awww. anyway, Dawson's therapist/some kind of supernatural being that isn't disclosed in this book + Gabe the barista/another supernatural being with empath abilities, come to the rescue and send Dawson back home to Reaper Daddy. i just love a happy ending.
the relational angst is pretty low and the spice doesn't show up until 75% in, but there's still like 4 or 5 decent scenes shoved in to that last bit. i LOVED the premise, loved the execution, loved the relationship building. it's written in second person which i struggle with because i like to highlight blue and orange from diff pov, but you can still tell who is getting emphasized in the chapter based on the feelings and thoughts being described. i'm fucking STOKED for Cal's "straight" "brother" Ellis to get knocked on his ass by Gabe in the next book. i nearly shipped him with Dawson when he makes his first appearance until i realized what the fuck i was reading and got myself together. who knew i needed gay paranormal romance in my life? not me!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 20, 2023
4.5 stars
Second chance with a twist
Dawson feels guilty for wishing his abusive husband had died in that car accident, and doesn't know how to react when instead he wakes up entirely without his memories.
Cal can tell that something is wrong between them, but he's so sure of his loving feelings towards Dawson that he wants to fix it, and he vows to encourage and support him in anything he wants to do.
With no one else free to help, and with a feeling of obligation, Dawson takes Cal back to their apartment and cares for him while he recovers. He struggles to reconcile his traumatic experiences with his growing feelings for the new man in front of him.
There's an additional layer of complexity that I can't mention here without spoiling and which I found very clever.
For something with quite dark themes (do check TWs), this was a surprisingly sweet and easy read. This kind of tone really works for me.
There's a dark cloud hanging over everything, but the general mood is very soft and domestic. Dawson and Cal get to know each other again, because without his memories Cal is a fundamentally different person. They spend time cooking together, watching movies and walking on the beach.
It's a very slow development, and I liked the pacing. I also really enjoyed how things played out when they did finally get intimate, Dawson being able to take control of the situation. The attention that Cal paid to him during sex was lovely.
I had a pretty strong dislike for Dawson's sister Olivia right from the beginning. She seemed to be at least somewhat aware of Dawson's situation and yet forced him to stay in spite of potential consequences. She continues on to be pushy and controlling, and I was so glad to see Dawson be honest with her and stand up for himself.
I do really wish that the ending had been developed a bit further. This didn't feel nearly as long as it should have given the page count, but some of the soft domestic moments could probably have been sacrificed in favour of an extra 50 or so pages from the 80% mark.
All in all, a very enjoyable book, and an impressive debut novel. I'll definitely be looking out for the sequel.
Second chance with a twist
Dawson feels guilty for wishing his abusive husband had died in that car accident, and doesn't know how to react when instead he wakes up entirely without his memories.
Cal can tell that something is wrong between them, but he's so sure of his loving feelings towards Dawson that he wants to fix it, and he vows to encourage and support him in anything he wants to do.
With no one else free to help, and with a feeling of obligation, Dawson takes Cal back to their apartment and cares for him while he recovers. He struggles to reconcile his traumatic experiences with his growing feelings for the new man in front of him.
There's an additional layer of complexity that I can't mention here without spoiling and which I found very clever.
For something with quite dark themes (do check TWs), this was a surprisingly sweet and easy read. This kind of tone really works for me.
There's a dark cloud hanging over everything, but the general mood is very soft and domestic. Dawson and Cal get to know each other again, because without his memories Cal is a fundamentally different person. They spend time cooking together, watching movies and walking on the beach.
It's a very slow development, and I liked the pacing. I also really enjoyed how things played out when they did finally get intimate, Dawson being able to take control of the situation. The attention that Cal paid to him during sex was lovely.
I had a pretty strong dislike for Dawson's sister Olivia right from the beginning. She seemed to be at least somewhat aware of Dawson's situation and yet forced him to stay in spite of potential consequences. She continues on to be pushy and controlling, and I was so glad to see Dawson be honest with her and stand up for himself.
I do really wish that the ending had been developed a bit further. This didn't feel nearly as long as it should have given the page count, but some of the soft domestic moments could probably have been sacrificed in favour of an extra 50 or so pages from the 80% mark.
All in all, a very enjoyable book, and an impressive debut novel. I'll definitely be looking out for the sequel.
August 17, 2023
TW/CW: On page SA.
I have no words for how this book made me feel.
You should read this. That is all.
I have no words for how this book made me feel.
You should read this. That is all.
March 20, 2024
- MM Romance
- PNR
- Hurt/Comfort
- Slow Burn
- Spicy
I need to find a way to keep tabs on who recommends books so I can thank them. This was a wonderful sweet read. Just loved it. You have to get through some ugly to get there but it makes it so worth it.
Dawson is married to Cal and it’s a very toxic and abusive marriage, with Cal being just a generally horrible person. Just when Dawson gets the courage to make a change, an accident changes everything. Cal is no longer the same person, in more ways than one. This is not the standard amnesia trope, you learn this right away. Even though we as the reader know, it does not take away from this journey.
New Cal and Dawson are just amazing to read about. Seriously there was just so much sweet and adorable in this. And donuts. Lots and lots of donuts 💜💜
- PNR
- Hurt/Comfort
- Slow Burn
- Spicy
I need to find a way to keep tabs on who recommends books so I can thank them. This was a wonderful sweet read. Just loved it. You have to get through some ugly to get there but it makes it so worth it.
Dawson is married to Cal and it’s a very toxic and abusive marriage, with Cal being just a generally horrible person. Just when Dawson gets the courage to make a change, an accident changes everything. Cal is no longer the same person, in more ways than one. This is not the standard amnesia trope, you learn this right away. Even though we as the reader know, it does not take away from this journey.
New Cal and Dawson are just amazing to read about. Seriously there was just so much sweet and adorable in this. And donuts. Lots and lots of donuts 💜💜
December 10, 2023
The concept was interesting, but unfortunately I don't think it was pulled off very well. The relationship progression felt a bit fast considering all of the previous trauma, and not much really happened — it felt very slice-of-life, in a mundane sort of way. I struggled with this one for a bit and ultimately decided to DNF at about 51%.
October 1, 2024
I went into this completely blind and boyy was I confused.
I don’t want to spoil anything so I’m going to keep this vague.
Caledon is not a nice man. He’s abusive, controlling and manipulative.
Dawson keeps enduring it all because he doesn’t know who he is, if he isn’t Caledon’s husband. When he is finally good and ready to present him with divorce papers, he gets a phone call that Caledon has been in an accident.
Dawson dreads Caledon waking up because he’s scared. When he finally does wake up, he is absolutely nothing like the man he used to know. He chalks it up to manipulation and keeps waiting for the other shoe to drop. Only, it never does.
This started out dark and I had no idea how it’s going to pan out. I felt so sorry for Dee and his situation. Caledon was the worst human.
To say I was invested when everything went down, is an understatement. Cal turned out to be the greenest flag ever.
This book had such a nice concept and I was eating it up! It was so interesting that the author somehow made me fall in love with Cal, even though I swore he couldn’t be redeemed. But if Dawson could fall in love with him, who am I to resist?
It turned out to be such a light and funny book despite its beginning. Cal was one of the most adorable MCs🥹
I don’t want to spoil anything so I’m going to keep this vague.
Caledon is not a nice man. He’s abusive, controlling and manipulative.
Dawson keeps enduring it all because he doesn’t know who he is, if he isn’t Caledon’s husband. When he is finally good and ready to present him with divorce papers, he gets a phone call that Caledon has been in an accident.
Dawson dreads Caledon waking up because he’s scared. When he finally does wake up, he is absolutely nothing like the man he used to know. He chalks it up to manipulation and keeps waiting for the other shoe to drop. Only, it never does.
This started out dark and I had no idea how it’s going to pan out. I felt so sorry for Dee and his situation. Caledon was the worst human.
To say I was invested when everything went down, is an understatement. Cal turned out to be the greenest flag ever.
This book had such a nice concept and I was eating it up! It was so interesting that the author somehow made me fall in love with Cal, even though I swore he couldn’t be redeemed. But if Dawson could fall in love with him, who am I to resist?
It turned out to be such a light and funny book despite its beginning. Cal was one of the most adorable MCs🥹
January 30, 2024
4.5 rounded up ~
I HAVE THOUGHTS SO THIS IS GONNA BE A LONG ONE.
What I loved:
Slow burn
Slice of life
Cal ♥︎
I NEVER read amnesia tropes but this was recommended to me on Reddit and after talking a bit I was convinced to give it a try.
Now this is going to be spoiled heavy because this isn’t mentioned in the blurb so if you don’t want to be spoiled look away!
We have;
*Dawson who is married to Cal, has been together 6 years married for 5.
*Caledon who is the alcoholic, abusive POS husband. There is on-page abuse so check TWs before reading.
Then we have a harvester/reaper who’s tasked to follow Caledon until it’s time for his death.
The reaper is present for the abuse and tries to soothe Dawson (obv he can’t because he’s in a different realm of existence ) he hates Caledon. Over time he starts to fall in love with Dawson and when it’s finally time to complete his job and reap Caledon’s soul he also jumps into Caledon’s body.
Caledon dies in the hospital and in his place is the reaper ( Cal) who has no memory of anything, including being a reaper but all he knows is that he loves Dawson and immediately wants to protect him from any harm and hates what he sees in the mirror but doesn’t know why.
So here’s where some of my confusion comes in on how to feel about this book. There is the darkness of the abuse but the book doesn’t feel somber because Cal is the sweetest cinnamon roll, he’s SO smitten with Dawson that I literally turned into a puddle of goo.
Dawson suffered a lot of abuse so I expected him to be flinching from Cal all the time and I expected him to be afraid of him, and there’s a little bit of that before he takes him home from the hospital but they fall into playful banter pretty quickly and that’s where I had a hard time because the gravity of the abuse that Dawson went through didn’t really match how quickly he was able to fall into a bossy role.
I also find myself struggling to romanticize the abused character being able to look at the face of his abuser and being able to fall in love with him. I appreciate that it’s mentioned that Caledon cut his hair every month and was always clean shaven and Cal lets his hair grow out and keeps some facial hair. But since this is a fantasy why not go a step further and have Cal wake up with different colored eyes, maybe not drastically different but different enough that when his hair grows out and he doesn’t have a clean shaven face he looks like a completely different person to Dawson and when Cal looks in the mirror he no longer has the urge to smash what he sees. To me, that would’ve made a big difference.
We get a lot of fluffy domestic scenes while Dawson and Cal and eventually towards the end of the book Cal gets his memories of being a reaper back and there’s a 3 day separation because Dawson thinks he’s crazy and trying to make up excuses for the abuse.
The resolution to that also wasn’t my favorite, the side characters are the ones to give Dawson a push to talk to Cal again after they reveal that they are also magical and that Cal isn’t lying. I think that could’ve been skipped and the conversation Dawson has with Cal that finally proves to him that he is a different person could’ve happened as normal and the revelation of the side characters being magic could’ve happened when Dawson had his therapy session with his magical therapist Ash.
This very much felt like Dawson’s story even though we also get some of Cal’s POV. I just wish that Cal was also going to therapy and making friends outside of his bubble with Dawson and I wish Cal got his reaper memories back earlier on so we could spend some time seeing the MCs bond with that new revelation.
Also, why didn’t they cuddle during movies? 🥺why didn’t we get to see Cal visit Dawson’s sister? Did Cal tell Ellis he isn’t his blood brother ?? I hope we find out about that relationship in the next book because they were bonding 🥺
So in conclusion I loved how sweet this was and I loved Dawson and Cal together and I will definitely be reading the next book and the 2 novellas this author has.
I HAVE THOUGHTS SO THIS IS GONNA BE A LONG ONE.
What I loved:
Slow burn
Slice of life
Cal ♥︎
I NEVER read amnesia tropes but this was recommended to me on Reddit and after talking a bit I was convinced to give it a try.
Now this is going to be spoiled heavy because this isn’t mentioned in the blurb so if you don’t want to be spoiled look away!
We have;
*Dawson who is married to Cal, has been together 6 years married for 5.
*Caledon who is the alcoholic, abusive POS husband. There is on-page abuse so check TWs before reading.
Then we have a harvester/reaper who’s tasked to follow Caledon until it’s time for his death.
The reaper is present for the abuse and tries to soothe Dawson (obv he can’t because he’s in a different realm of existence ) he hates Caledon. Over time he starts to fall in love with Dawson and when it’s finally time to complete his job and reap Caledon’s soul he also jumps into Caledon’s body.
Caledon dies in the hospital and in his place is the reaper ( Cal) who has no memory of anything, including being a reaper but all he knows is that he loves Dawson and immediately wants to protect him from any harm and hates what he sees in the mirror but doesn’t know why.
So here’s where some of my confusion comes in on how to feel about this book. There is the darkness of the abuse but the book doesn’t feel somber because Cal is the sweetest cinnamon roll, he’s SO smitten with Dawson that I literally turned into a puddle of goo.
Dawson suffered a lot of abuse so I expected him to be flinching from Cal all the time and I expected him to be afraid of him, and there’s a little bit of that before he takes him home from the hospital but they fall into playful banter pretty quickly and that’s where I had a hard time because the gravity of the abuse that Dawson went through didn’t really match how quickly he was able to fall into a bossy role.
I also find myself struggling to romanticize the abused character being able to look at the face of his abuser and being able to fall in love with him. I appreciate that it’s mentioned that Caledon cut his hair every month and was always clean shaven and Cal lets his hair grow out and keeps some facial hair. But since this is a fantasy why not go a step further and have Cal wake up with different colored eyes, maybe not drastically different but different enough that when his hair grows out and he doesn’t have a clean shaven face he looks like a completely different person to Dawson and when Cal looks in the mirror he no longer has the urge to smash what he sees. To me, that would’ve made a big difference.
We get a lot of fluffy domestic scenes while Dawson and Cal and eventually towards the end of the book Cal gets his memories of being a reaper back and there’s a 3 day separation because Dawson thinks he’s crazy and trying to make up excuses for the abuse.
The resolution to that also wasn’t my favorite, the side characters are the ones to give Dawson a push to talk to Cal again after they reveal that they are also magical and that Cal isn’t lying. I think that could’ve been skipped and the conversation Dawson has with Cal that finally proves to him that he is a different person could’ve happened as normal and the revelation of the side characters being magic could’ve happened when Dawson had his therapy session with his magical therapist Ash.
This very much felt like Dawson’s story even though we also get some of Cal’s POV. I just wish that Cal was also going to therapy and making friends outside of his bubble with Dawson and I wish Cal got his reaper memories back earlier on so we could spend some time seeing the MCs bond with that new revelation.
Also, why didn’t they cuddle during movies? 🥺why didn’t we get to see Cal visit Dawson’s sister? Did Cal tell Ellis he isn’t his blood brother ?? I hope we find out about that relationship in the next book because they were bonding 🥺
So in conclusion I loved how sweet this was and I loved Dawson and Cal together and I will definitely be reading the next book and the 2 novellas this author has.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 2, 2023
***ARC Review***
This is my honest review for the ARC I received.
This book had my rapt attention as early as the prologue. You could feel the emotions coming off of the page. Dawson is in complete hell with his husband Cal. Cal is controlling and callous. The harvester (reaper) is so enamored with Dawson that he wants to break the only rule his kind has.
An accident causes a change in Cal. One that is initially hard for Dawson to accept. Cal has no memories of the man he was before. The MCs have to learn how to live with each other again.
This is a sweeping story full of so much emotion. It will have you in tears. It will make you cringe and swoon. There’s definitely an emotional rollercoaster at play here. I loved the pacing, angst, character development, and slow burn in this story. There’s hearty dialogue. There’s light, so much light, in the darkness. It really was a moving and meaningful story.
I appreciated movie references to The Vow and one other I won’t name, because spoilers. This was a debut book by Amithia Raine, but it definitely won’t be my last time reading something from this author. I’m already looking forward to Ellis and Gabe’s book!
There are some heavy topics in this story, so be sure to check out the trigger warnings on the author’s website.
This is my honest review for the ARC I received.
This book had my rapt attention as early as the prologue. You could feel the emotions coming off of the page. Dawson is in complete hell with his husband Cal. Cal is controlling and callous. The harvester (reaper) is so enamored with Dawson that he wants to break the only rule his kind has.
An accident causes a change in Cal. One that is initially hard for Dawson to accept. Cal has no memories of the man he was before. The MCs have to learn how to live with each other again.
This is a sweeping story full of so much emotion. It will have you in tears. It will make you cringe and swoon. There’s definitely an emotional rollercoaster at play here. I loved the pacing, angst, character development, and slow burn in this story. There’s hearty dialogue. There’s light, so much light, in the darkness. It really was a moving and meaningful story.
I appreciated movie references to The Vow and one other I won’t name, because spoilers. This was a debut book by Amithia Raine, but it definitely won’t be my last time reading something from this author. I’m already looking forward to Ellis and Gabe’s book!
There are some heavy topics in this story, so be sure to check out the trigger warnings on the author’s website.
June 19, 2024
This ended up surprisingly fluffy after a suuuuper rough and triggering (for me) beginning. Super cute to see Dawson treated properly though, and I enjoyed all of it except for the absolute last page lol. I went through it very fast too - I see others saying it dragged but I actually really enjoyed the length.
June 28, 2024
4+
Pomimo naprawdę mrocznego początku i ciężkich tematów, to urocza i słodka książka 💙
Decyzje, które musi podjąć Dawson, są trudne - nie ma się tutaj co czarować. Jedni będą się z nimi zgadzać, inni nie - ja mu niezmiennie kibicowałam, bo zasłużył sobie absolutnie na to, aby w końcu w życiu być szczęśliwym.
Do tego odrobina fantasy, która zmienia wszystko.
I pies, który też chce być kochany, pomimo tego, iż wymaga nieco więcej uwagi.
I donuty - nie można o nich zapomnieć 😉
I może trochę za dużo seksu w ostatnich 20% książki, kiedy chłopaki w końcu do niego doszły, ale co tam - macham na to ręką 😜
Pomimo naprawdę mrocznego początku i ciężkich tematów, to urocza i słodka książka 💙
Decyzje, które musi podjąć Dawson, są trudne - nie ma się tutaj co czarować. Jedni będą się z nimi zgadzać, inni nie - ja mu niezmiennie kibicowałam, bo zasłużył sobie absolutnie na to, aby w końcu w życiu być szczęśliwym.
Do tego odrobina fantasy, która zmienia wszystko.
I pies, który też chce być kochany, pomimo tego, iż wymaga nieco więcej uwagi.
I donuty - nie można o nich zapomnieć 😉
I może trochę za dużo seksu w ostatnich 20% książki, kiedy chłopaki w końcu do niego doszły, ale co tam - macham na to ręką 😜
February 10, 2024
5/5. Highlights may contain spoilers. Read at your own risk.
Content Warnings for book: Alcoholism, domestic violence (not between MCs), emotional abuse, gaslighting, on-page rape (not between MCs), death, hospitals, parental death (referenced), vomiting
Kink: N/A
A note that many of the CWs listed happen on-page, in detail, mostly in flashbacks or recalled memories. One MC inhabits the body of an abuser and this, obviously, comes with its complications.
This book is over 450 pages — and it didn’t feel like it, at all. I was engrossed on every page. Being in the heads of Cal and Dawson, their perspectives and character voices were wonderfully different. Raine is good at weaving emotion and connection between these two.
I don’t want to say too much about the plot - I really think it’s good to read it yourself with only the blurb as the premise. However, if you’re worried about it, there is a reveal of the paranormal aspect to the story. The truth does come out. Albeit, I do think it’s a tad rushed. I imagine the paranormal world building comes out much clearer in Gabe’s book, so I’m content to wait. Really, this is the author’s first series, and one of my other favorite authors struggled a bit with paranormal element pacing too in the beginning. Now they do it effervescently, and I believe Raine can do the same.
One thing I’ll note is: I saw complaints about Kieran and Olivia’s reactions. Why? Yes, they were flawed human beings. Yes, they were sometimes rude to Dawson. It’s also known that cutting yourself off from someone who is being abused - with harsh judgement, pushing them - really just robs them of a supportive network. However, I am sure if we had a friend who finally was ready to commit to a divorce and had real set out plans to leave and then all of a sudden we see all these things from an outside perspective… we might be angry and upset too.
I don’t really enjoy angst and slow burn, but it doesn’t matter here because this did it for me 💯. I have such a book hangover now. How will I cope?
Content Warnings for book: Alcoholism, domestic violence (not between MCs), emotional abuse, gaslighting, on-page rape (not between MCs), death, hospitals, parental death (referenced), vomiting
Kink: N/A
A note that many of the CWs listed happen on-page, in detail, mostly in flashbacks or recalled memories. One MC inhabits the body of an abuser and this, obviously, comes with its complications.
This book is over 450 pages — and it didn’t feel like it, at all. I was engrossed on every page. Being in the heads of Cal and Dawson, their perspectives and character voices were wonderfully different. Raine is good at weaving emotion and connection between these two.
I don’t want to say too much about the plot - I really think it’s good to read it yourself with only the blurb as the premise. However, if you’re worried about it, there is a reveal of the paranormal aspect to the story. The truth does come out. Albeit, I do think it’s a tad rushed. I imagine the paranormal world building comes out much clearer in Gabe’s book, so I’m content to wait. Really, this is the author’s first series, and one of my other favorite authors struggled a bit with paranormal element pacing too in the beginning. Now they do it effervescently, and I believe Raine can do the same.
One thing I’ll note is: I saw complaints about Kieran and Olivia’s reactions. Why? Yes, they were flawed human beings. Yes, they were sometimes rude to Dawson. It’s also known that cutting yourself off from someone who is being abused - with harsh judgement, pushing them - really just robs them of a supportive network. However, I am sure if we had a friend who finally was ready to commit to a divorce and had real set out plans to leave and then all of a sudden we see all these things from an outside perspective… we might be angry and upset too.
I don’t really enjoy angst and slow burn, but it doesn’t matter here because this did it for me 💯. I have such a book hangover now. How will I cope?
November 8, 2023
Re-read October 2023
-------------------
I really liked this!
I was even hesitating to give it 5 stars, but in the end there were two things that bothered me a bit, so 4 stars it is.
I really loved the slow burn in this. And the whole reaper took over a body... yes please! Dawson was a really likable person, even if he was waaaay to good to Cal at first. And Cal was adorable. Reaper Cal that is, not the real Cal, who was a dick.
But it did drag a bit in the middle, and I was disappointed when the truth was revealed. It felt rushed and not fleshed out enough to me. Since the rest of the book was so detailed, I was kind of hoping for something... more, I guess.
-------------------
I really liked this!
I was even hesitating to give it 5 stars, but in the end there were two things that bothered me a bit, so 4 stars it is.
I really loved the slow burn in this. And the whole reaper took over a body... yes please! Dawson was a really likable person, even if he was waaaay to good to Cal at first. And Cal was adorable. Reaper Cal that is, not the real Cal, who was a dick.
But it did drag a bit in the middle, and I was disappointed when the truth was revealed. It felt rushed and not fleshed out enough to me. Since the rest of the book was so detailed, I was kind of hoping for something... more, I guess.
January 3, 2024
An interesting idea, to give an amnesia based story a different spin from the usual.
The paranormal part of the story — though only really topic in the beginning and the end — gave the otherwise rather boring story a bit of a twist. Without that, I probably wouldn’t have liked this book.
The paranormal part of the story — though only really topic in the beginning and the end — gave the otherwise rather boring story a bit of a twist. Without that, I probably wouldn’t have liked this book.
January 11, 2024
I can't really decide if this was a 4 or a 5 read for me. I forgot to review it after reading it since i wanted to sit on it for a bit. It's one of the best hurt comfort romance books that i've ever read. As a sucker for that trope it sits higher for me.
This book was a refreshing twist on the amnesia/memory loss trope. I think the blending of paranormal aspects and contemporary setting was a good twist for the story.
I think the 'dark romance' tag threw me through a loop, since it's not actually as dark as I expected it to be. However, the story is paced well after the initial buildup of the main plot line.
I recommend this read, but if you're looking for something dark, this is not the one to pick up.
This book was a refreshing twist on the amnesia/memory loss trope. I think the blending of paranormal aspects and contemporary setting was a good twist for the story.
I think the 'dark romance' tag threw me through a loop, since it's not actually as dark as I expected it to be. However, the story is paced well after the initial buildup of the main plot line.
I recommend this read, but if you're looking for something dark, this is not the one to pick up.
February 7, 2024
Literally have goosebumps
There's no way to put into words how much I loved this book. I'd been in a major book slump until I found this one. Holy hell. I couldn't put it down. I can not wait for Ellis and Gabes book! Absolutely beautiful writing and it made me tear up and laugh out loud more than once.
There's no way to put into words how much I loved this book. I'd been in a major book slump until I found this one. Holy hell. I couldn't put it down. I can not wait for Ellis and Gabes book! Absolutely beautiful writing and it made me tear up and laugh out loud more than once.
December 10, 2023
Well...finally finished it. Spoilsport review to come!
August 9, 2023
This was so much sweeter than I was expecting! I think it's in part due to the fact that although the MC who has been abused in the past is struggling with it throughout the book he does so with a certain amount of..distance? Not many tears or PTSD rather thoughts of 'should I really be okay with everything that is going on atm?' I'm definitely looking forward to the future books in this series :)
Also, side note: if Australians truly use the term dairy-free for lactose free products that's..interesting - parmesan will always be made of dairy and will always mature for long enough to be lactose free :D
tags:
Some quotes
NSFW infos:
- One young man who has been married for six years, out and gay (26/7?)
- One
- strict top bottom, younger MC who was raped in the past bottoms
Also, side note: if Australians truly use the term dairy-free for lactose free products that's..interesting - parmesan will always be made of dairy and will always mature for long enough to be lactose free :D
tags:
Some quotes
"how can you miss someone who's a virtual stranger? Except Dawson doesn't feel like a stranger. On the contrary. He feels like home." (p. 95)
"Because even if you didn't deserve it, I do. I deserve to be happy." (p. 338)
NSFW infos:
- One young man who has been married for six years, out and gay (26/7?)
- One
- strict top bottom, younger MC who was raped in the past bottoms
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