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Reclaiming the Sand #1
Reclaiming the Sand
Bully and victim.
Tormenter and tormented.
Villain and hero.
Ellie McCallum was a bully. No connection to anyone or anything. A sad and lonely existence for a young woman who had come to expect nothing more for herself. Her only happiness coming from making others miserable.
Particularly Freaky Flynn.
Flynn Hendrick lived a life completely disconnected even as he struggled to become something more than that boy with Asperger's. He was taunted and teased, bearing the brunt of systematic and calculated cruelty, ultimately culminating in a catastrophic turn of events that brought Ellie and Flynn’s worlds crashing down.
But then Flynn and Ellie grew up.
And moved on.
Until years later when their paths unexpectedly cross again and the bully and the freak are face to face once more.
When labels come to define you, finding yourself feels impossible. Particularly for two people disconnected from the world who inexplicably find a connection in each other.
And out of the wreckage of their tragic beginnings, an unlikely love story unfolds.
But a painful past doesn’t always want to let go. And old wounds are never truly healed…and sometimes the further you try to run from yourself the closer you come to who you really are.
Tormenter and tormented.
Villain and hero.
Ellie McCallum was a bully. No connection to anyone or anything. A sad and lonely existence for a young woman who had come to expect nothing more for herself. Her only happiness coming from making others miserable.
Particularly Freaky Flynn.
Flynn Hendrick lived a life completely disconnected even as he struggled to become something more than that boy with Asperger's. He was taunted and teased, bearing the brunt of systematic and calculated cruelty, ultimately culminating in a catastrophic turn of events that brought Ellie and Flynn’s worlds crashing down.
But then Flynn and Ellie grew up.
And moved on.
Until years later when their paths unexpectedly cross again and the bully and the freak are face to face once more.
When labels come to define you, finding yourself feels impossible. Particularly for two people disconnected from the world who inexplicably find a connection in each other.
And out of the wreckage of their tragic beginnings, an unlikely love story unfolds.
But a painful past doesn’t always want to let go. And old wounds are never truly healed…and sometimes the further you try to run from yourself the closer you come to who you really are.
342 pages, ebook
First published March 17, 2014
About the author
A. Meredith Walters
34 books4,292 followersThe New York Times and USA Today bestselling author of Contemporary and New Adult romances including the Bad Rep, Find You in the Dark, Reclaiming the Sand, and Twisted Love series.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 869 reviews
March 14, 2014
I want to start out by saying that when I write 5 star reviews, I do it so that the author can read my words and feel good about impacting another reader. I usually choose my words carefully and try to focus on everything that moved, touched, or impressed me.
Well, I can say that I'm writing this one for me. Sorry A. Meredith Walters, but I'm going to be a little selfish with this one.
Almost four years ago, I had my first child. A beautiful, chubby, blue-eyed joy that I couldn't wait to teach. I was a new mother; overwhelmed, overjoyed with the new adventure of raising a child and showing him how to be a man. But by the time he hit 18 months, it was obvious he wasn't like other kids. He couldn't stack blocks, he wasn't speaking, and he couldn't find the motor skills to hold a fork. Two months later, the school district slapped an autism diagnosis on him, and I froze.
I don't think it's easy for any mother to send their child off to school that first day, all alone on a big bus, with strangers all around them. But I can't even express to you how terrifying it was for me to do this, even before he hit 24 months; handing him over to smiling strangers reassuring me he was in good hands. He was still my beautiful baby boy, and I didn't care that he was 'different.' But it wasn't about me, it was about my son.
Junior will be 4 in June, and just now is he starting to pair two words together. When I read the first Flynn chapters, I almost vomited for how much I cried. This author gave my son a voice; one I've never heard, one I might never hear. And I can't tell you how monumentally grateful I am for that. And even though the book opened my eyes to the fact that people are going to hate my son, call him a 'freak,' or bully him to the point of physical harm (because people can suck), it was still a harsh reality that I hadn't considered, but should've.
This book spoke directly to me.
So while I could sit here and tell you that the writing was flawless, the flow natural, the story supreme, and even the secondary characters were written in such detail that they popped out from the pages, I'm not going to deny the fact that those weren't the things that stood out for me. A. Meredith Walters is a New York Times bestseller for a reason - she doesn't fuck around. She's not the kind of author that slaps a diagnosis on her characters without putting the research and dedication behind it. You do the math - the book is superb. No. For me, Reclaiming the Sand has blown a hole through my chest and grabbed hold of my beating heart and will stay there forever. Flynn and Ellie won my heart, but better yet, I'm walking away with a better grip on my reality and a stronger mother for my boy.
It has also given me hope.
Thank you for writing this book.
Well, I can say that I'm writing this one for me. Sorry A. Meredith Walters, but I'm going to be a little selfish with this one.
Almost four years ago, I had my first child. A beautiful, chubby, blue-eyed joy that I couldn't wait to teach. I was a new mother; overwhelmed, overjoyed with the new adventure of raising a child and showing him how to be a man. But by the time he hit 18 months, it was obvious he wasn't like other kids. He couldn't stack blocks, he wasn't speaking, and he couldn't find the motor skills to hold a fork. Two months later, the school district slapped an autism diagnosis on him, and I froze.
I don't think it's easy for any mother to send their child off to school that first day, all alone on a big bus, with strangers all around them. But I can't even express to you how terrifying it was for me to do this, even before he hit 24 months; handing him over to smiling strangers reassuring me he was in good hands. He was still my beautiful baby boy, and I didn't care that he was 'different.' But it wasn't about me, it was about my son.
Junior will be 4 in June, and just now is he starting to pair two words together. When I read the first Flynn chapters, I almost vomited for how much I cried. This author gave my son a voice; one I've never heard, one I might never hear. And I can't tell you how monumentally grateful I am for that. And even though the book opened my eyes to the fact that people are going to hate my son, call him a 'freak,' or bully him to the point of physical harm (because people can suck), it was still a harsh reality that I hadn't considered, but should've.
This book spoke directly to me.
So while I could sit here and tell you that the writing was flawless, the flow natural, the story supreme, and even the secondary characters were written in such detail that they popped out from the pages, I'm not going to deny the fact that those weren't the things that stood out for me. A. Meredith Walters is a New York Times bestseller for a reason - she doesn't fuck around. She's not the kind of author that slaps a diagnosis on her characters without putting the research and dedication behind it. You do the math - the book is superb. No. For me, Reclaiming the Sand has blown a hole through my chest and grabbed hold of my beating heart and will stay there forever. Flynn and Ellie won my heart, but better yet, I'm walking away with a better grip on my reality and a stronger mother for my boy.
It has also given me hope.
Thank you for writing this book.
April 20, 2015
5+ emotionally spent stars!
I was so nervous to read this book. I had heard so much about it. Some loved it, some couldn’t finish it. All I knew is it was written by the author of one of my favorite books and it sounded like an emotional read so I picked it up. I’m so happy I did. It was not an easy read, there were parts that were hard for me to stomach, it was worth it. This story was original, heart wrenching, beautiful and simply remarkable.
If you don’t know much about Asperger’s Syndrome or Reactive Attachment Disorder, before you read Reclaiming the Sand I would highly recommend you doing a little reading. If you don’t understand the two main characters, you may not ‘get’ their story. I’m not condoning some of Ellie’s actions, but if you know ahead of time what is she has been diagnosed with, you may understand her a little better, and like me, love her by the end.
Asperger’s Syndrome
Reactive Attachment Disorder
Ellie.
Ellie is not your typical heroine. She has been through a lot in her life. Growing up in the foster system hasn’t been easy. She has no family, no real friends. The one person she had, that was a real friend and truly there for her she pushed away and treated beyond terribly. She had cared about Flynn, more than she wanted to and she didn’t know how to handle it. She didn’t want to be the way she was.
I had cared about Flynn. So much. It had scared me. I was terrified to feel anything for anyone. I had spent most of my life shutting everyone out. I hadn’t a defense against a quite boy who was just as lost as I was. I had opened up. I had let him in. And then I had pushed him away in the only way I could. By destroying him.
Ellie made some big mistakes, and we get many flashbacks of those in the story, but now she has her life somewhat together. Or she’s trying to. She’s working full time and attempting to go to college. It’s just one class, but it’s something. Ellie hasn’t seen or heard from Flynn in years, he moved away when they were in high school after one big event. But now he’s back in town.
Flynn.
Flynn’s story will break you. It will tear your heart to shreds. I cried so many tears for this boy. He wasn’t normal, but he was perfect. Getting into the past, the flashbacks from his point of view gutted me.
‘I hate being alone. I want people to talk to me. I want them to like me. It makes me angry when I try to say something and people ignore me. Or worse they laugh. They call me names. Lots of names. Mean names.’
Flynn doesn’t know why his new friend Ellie is mean to him. She comes to his house after school, she hangs out with him, they like each other and get along. But when she’s with her other friends, she stands by and watches them mistreat him. Sometimes she joins in. He just doesn’t understand. His syndrome makes it hard for him to get it. But he always forgives her. Every time. Now, after years of being apart, seeing her again is odd for him. He doesn’t know how to act. He still cares for Ellie. Ellie cares for him. She know she doesn’t deserve Flynn, even as a friend. Not after all she’s done. Yet he’s forgiven her.
Flynn had forgiven me, even when I couldn’t apologize. He always did. I wasn’t sure who was the bigger idiot. Flynn for accepting an apology I could never verbalize or me for not being brave enough to say it.Moving forward from the past isn’t easy for these two, but it’s necessary. They need each other. Need to be in each others lives.
What starts as a renewing of an old friendship slowly turns into a relationship. Is it possible for these two to have a healthy relationship? Two people with such a past, so much baggage. They have everything working against them. They're aren’t two people who appear more wrong for each other, yet somehow it seems so right.
There were never two people more ill suited for a relationship than us. We were all wrong. We didn’t stand a chance. And that made me want to fight for it even harder.
I loved the dual pov in this story. Getting into both Flynn and Ellie’s head made you see the entire picture. There is no one like Flynn Hendrick. No one. He is a hero unlike any other. He’s awkward, sweet, kind and lovable. He has no filter, says exactly what he thinks and I love that about him. The hardest part of reading this book was having to witness the heartbreaking moments in his life. I couldn’t stand it. There were a few times I had to take a break and a couple deep breaths. Then there is Ellie. I may be in the minority here, but I grew to love Ellie. She is hard to love. She can be cruel and mean. I hated some of her actions, but she had moments. Moments when she showed the persons he really was. Life dealt her a crappy hand, and the disorder she has on top of that makes it hard for her to act a certain way. I forgave Ellie for her wrongs. Her friends on the other hand, I couldn’t handle them. Despite the things Ellie’s done, she’s trying to be better. She’s remorseful. And she loves Flynn.
I had been slowly dying for all these years and he brought me back to life. He taught me that being Ellie McCallum was okay. Because she was flawed and troubled. But she was also smart and capable and worthy of love.
People aren’t perfect. Life is messy. Love is beautiful.
I wish I could find the words to explain how much this story touched me. But I can't. Some of the characters were far from perfect, but their story was moving. Their story was memorable. The writing was phenomenal. Even though the ending felt a little hurried, I still loved the way it ended. This book and Flynn Hendricks will stay in my heart for a long while.
Flynn Hendrick has taught me how to feel. He had taught me how to live. He had taught me how to love.
October 17, 2014
5 ‘IT’S GOING TO HURT LIKE A MOTHERF**KER’ STARS
No doubt or second guessing about it, Reclaiming the Sand just earned a “best book of 2014” nomination from me. Three words come to mind when I was asked to describe the story: get-your-tissues-ready, OMG-the-writing-is-phenomenal, and Flynn-will-steal-your-heart. Technically three words right?
Normally this is where I launch into a brief description of the book and what I thought was great and yada yada, but this review is going to be a little different. I don’t want to give ANYTHING away so what you read from the blurb is all you’re getting from me. The reason I say this is because the entire story is based on the friendship/lover dynamic between Flynn and Ellie and the plot is a secondary factor in the book so there’s not much I can say about it. Instead, I’m going to focus on just the emotional aspect that may come up when you read...
Ellie is a bitch and mega twat. There’s just really no other way to say it. She’s ruthlessly mean to Flynn, who is the sweetest and kindest man and though he suffers from Asperger’s, he repeatedly forgives and reaches out to Ellie. How can anyone not fall for this man? I was tearing up at 7% and just didn’t stop crying until the end of the book, and even after that I sat for a good half hour and bawled my eyes out. In the middle of all that, I also might’ve deliriously messaged the author multiple times and got on her nerves. Anyways, my point is that you will CRY. You will FEEL. You will HATE. And then you will LOVE.
Even with me finishing the book, I can never fully understand why Ellie would direct so much poison and hate towards Flynn but I never condemned her. I mean, what she did is so unforgivable in many ways, and while I cried for Flynn and all the abuse he suffered, I also cried for Ellie. She was the victim of the inadequacies of the foster care system, repeatedly taking the heat for things she never should’ve experienced or gotten blamed for, and receiving this kind of treatment at such a young age without an outlet is traumatizing, at least in my eyes. I, for one, sympathized for her and could forgive her because she did redeem herself in the second portion of the book.
And Flynn...this man with two hearts of gold just stole my heart. There are a couple of chapters completely in his POV and let me just tell you, grab some kind of stress/anxiety reliever because those chapters have the most heartbreaking scenes I have ever read. I think the author did a fine job of writing in his perspective considering his Asperger’s, which in turn, made it that much harder to read because I got to hear his thoughts and experience his emotions when he was taunted and tortured. Just...GRAB SOMETHING to get you through it.
As for the romance aspect, I loved that the author slowly, expertly got to the point where both characters were comfortable to move forward with their relationship. With their destructive past, I expected a LOT of development and growth to happen before any kind of romance came in and the author delivered that flawlessly. Still, reminders of their past and old scars served as constant memories and I could really tell both Ellie and Flynn were making efforts to mend the cracks in their relationship.
Although the ending was a bit rushed given the drawn out nature of the rest of the book, it still delivered the emotional impact that was warranted and so I was pleased with the way the story concluded.
This is where my review sort of turns into a forum, and I say that because this book was thoroughly discussed in my Goodreads thread and I want to share that with you. Normally I don’t include these kind of things, but this book is SO unique, thoughtful, and bold I want you to get an idea of how my reading timeline worked and what others thought and said at the time.
7% mark:
Me: Holy cow this book is awesome!! I’ve been told that Ellie is a mega twat so I’m prepared!! xx
Jenny: OMG! We've just finalised our review for this one. Ellie....I can't even...twat is the right word but wait until you meet her friend!! Flynn on the other hand stole my heart. Can't wait to hear your thoughts. The writing was wonderful. xx(
Me: Oh YAY!!! I'm equally excited to read y'all's review! It's like eating a box of Godiva chocolates hehe
I got a glimpse of Dania and UGH! Über super mega x infinity twat lol! Oh and the writing is beautiful, totally loving it so far <3 <--- by the way, Dania is Ellie’s best friend and just watch out for
Jenny: OMG! I miss Godiva chocolates lol
Oh geez, you ain't seen nothing yet! I wanted to bitch slap Dania soooo badly! Enjoy! :)
19% mark:
Me: OMG :(
Katy: Oh I have this one, enjoy Feifei :)))
Me: Thanks Katy! Ohhhh this book is making me cry non stop!! :(
Katy: Oh hell, but that's why I love Meredith's books!! Loved her find you in the dark series... I'll be watching out for your updates :))))
Me: Loved that series too! This is really good but it's so heartbreaking >_<
Katy: Ohhhh :((( good luck x
Mysza: That good, huh?
Me: It's so good!!! A heartbreaking story but it's amazing! <3
Mysza: Well then, just one-clicked this one. Thanks for updates, they really encouraged me:)
Me: You're welcome! I just finished it and wow...get the tissues ready! I can't breathe through my nose since its all stuffed lol :) <--- this is me responding after I finished since I ignored Goodreads after this 19% mark
100%mark
Me: I actually finished this 30 mins ago but just sat here crying and crying. My heart hurts. My face hurts from all the crying. And I have to breathe through my mouth because my nose is clogged up.
Claire: I will save this one for at home then.....Nothing worse than crying like a nutter when you are on public transport!!
Me: Definitely save it for home!!!!! I should've thought of that before since I now have to go to work looking like Rudolph the Reindeer :(
Bibliophilia: My kinda book then ;)
Me: Haha ;)
Sim: I was going to start while eating breakfast and waiting for the office computer to fire up. I guess I'd better not - thanks for the heads-up!
Me: LOL! A tearjerker is putting it lightly :/
Claire: Lol, I'm going to start it when I get home this evening :)
Gena: ahh!! so excited for this!!! did you love it Feifei?
Brandi: Lots of crying...I will have to stock up on alcohol and tissues. :)
Jessica: *hugs*
Denisse: oh honey.... I want to read this and cry too. love this author. reading this with my girl Patty later on this week. Sending you big hugs...
Sammy: *hugs*
Jennifer: I'm sorry I didn't give you a heads up about the tears that come with this story :( I didn't know if you were a crier like me when it comes to books!!!!
Baba: *hands tissues* :)
J.B.: This sounds quite interesting. I think I'm not ready for such an intense crying book at the moment. :) Glad you seemed to enjoy it.
Me to Claire: ENJOY!! :D
Me to Gena: I LOVED IT Gena!!! It was really emotional for me but I pulled through! I think you'd like it ;)
Me to Brandi: LOL yes that'd definitely help! I only had my sleeve... ;)
Me to Jessica: ((hugs)) ♥
Me to Denisse: Ooooh y'all are in for a treat! :D ((hugs)) <3
Me to Sammy: ((uber squishy hugs)) :D
Me to Jennifer: Haha no problem!! I'm actually glad you didn't so I could experience it full-force! If you had told me I'd probably sucked up my tears ;) Oh and you're totally right!! This book is awesome! <3
Me to Baba: Thank you Baba!! ♥ ♥
Me to J.B.: Thank you J.B.! I didn't expect it to be so intense and tear-inducing but wouldn't have it any other way! Hope you like it if you read it :D
Mysza: O.M.G. Feifei, I'm at 16% and it sounds so promising, so far it's a great reading!
Me: Yay!!! Hope it continues to be that way! Hugs and kisses ahead of time! ;) ♥
J: Okay I have to ask....(view spoiler) You know me....too many feels aren't good for me. LMAO!
Me: LOL I get you. I can't handle all the feels either and this one took the cake. (view spoiler) Ugh. I still can't breathe through my nose haha ;)
Mysza: Thank God, woof... (thanks for asking J, it's been eating me). <--- you’ll get the woof reference when you read it ;)
Me: Haha! Enjoy :D
Assenette: Ok, I was going to read during my breaks & lunch time, but I see I need to wait until I get home. I'm already feeling nervous and I'm just one chapter in.
:)
Me: Oh definitely a good call! That prologue was something! Enjoy! :D
J: Phew...okay, I can read it then! I think! Thanks friend! :)
Nikki: Snot inducing torture?? Sounds freaking fantastic! Just added it! :)
Me: LMAO!! Haven't heard of that one, brilliant! It is fantastic but puts your emotions through the wringer :/
E: That awesome? Got to get me one of these soonish then :)
Chelsea: Wow fei that good? Can't wait... I wonder if i'm gonna cry coz I haven't cried over a book yet, just slightly teary- eyed but that's it =)
Me: GET IT!!!!!! :D
I didn't think I was going to such a baby but the waterworks started at 7% lol :(
Lisa: Enjjjjjoooooooooy !!!!! You love to torture yourself don't you ? LOL
Me: Thanks dear and LOL!! Had no idea it was a tearjerker haha! A bumpy read but worth it :D
E: Started! Page 7 now. *clutches a box of tissue*
Me: Ahahaha!! Enjoy ;)
So you can see, this book wasn’t just me reading it by myself or only my take from it; I got to fully experience everything this book had to offer with all the above chats and then some...if you’re looking for a highly emotional, life-changing, soul-etching read, I would recommend this one, and while you’re at it, grab some friends and tissues and HAPPY READING!
No doubt or second guessing about it, Reclaiming the Sand just earned a “best book of 2014” nomination from me. Three words come to mind when I was asked to describe the story: get-your-tissues-ready, OMG-the-writing-is-phenomenal, and Flynn-will-steal-your-heart. Technically three words right?
Normally this is where I launch into a brief description of the book and what I thought was great and yada yada, but this review is going to be a little different. I don’t want to give ANYTHING away so what you read from the blurb is all you’re getting from me. The reason I say this is because the entire story is based on the friendship/lover dynamic between Flynn and Ellie and the plot is a secondary factor in the book so there’s not much I can say about it. Instead, I’m going to focus on just the emotional aspect that may come up when you read...
Ellie is a bitch and mega twat. There’s just really no other way to say it. She’s ruthlessly mean to Flynn, who is the sweetest and kindest man and though he suffers from Asperger’s, he repeatedly forgives and reaches out to Ellie. How can anyone not fall for this man? I was tearing up at 7% and just didn’t stop crying until the end of the book, and even after that I sat for a good half hour and bawled my eyes out. In the middle of all that, I also might’ve deliriously messaged the author multiple times and got on her nerves. Anyways, my point is that you will CRY. You will FEEL. You will HATE. And then you will LOVE.
Even with me finishing the book, I can never fully understand why Ellie would direct so much poison and hate towards Flynn but I never condemned her. I mean, what she did is so unforgivable in many ways, and while I cried for Flynn and all the abuse he suffered, I also cried for Ellie. She was the victim of the inadequacies of the foster care system, repeatedly taking the heat for things she never should’ve experienced or gotten blamed for, and receiving this kind of treatment at such a young age without an outlet is traumatizing, at least in my eyes. I, for one, sympathized for her and could forgive her because she did redeem herself in the second portion of the book.
And Flynn...this man with two hearts of gold just stole my heart. There are a couple of chapters completely in his POV and let me just tell you, grab some kind of stress/anxiety reliever because those chapters have the most heartbreaking scenes I have ever read. I think the author did a fine job of writing in his perspective considering his Asperger’s, which in turn, made it that much harder to read because I got to hear his thoughts and experience his emotions when he was taunted and tortured. Just...GRAB SOMETHING to get you through it.
As for the romance aspect, I loved that the author slowly, expertly got to the point where both characters were comfortable to move forward with their relationship. With their destructive past, I expected a LOT of development and growth to happen before any kind of romance came in and the author delivered that flawlessly. Still, reminders of their past and old scars served as constant memories and I could really tell both Ellie and Flynn were making efforts to mend the cracks in their relationship.
Although the ending was a bit rushed given the drawn out nature of the rest of the book, it still delivered the emotional impact that was warranted and so I was pleased with the way the story concluded.
This is where my review sort of turns into a forum, and I say that because this book was thoroughly discussed in my Goodreads thread and I want to share that with you. Normally I don’t include these kind of things, but this book is SO unique, thoughtful, and bold I want you to get an idea of how my reading timeline worked and what others thought and said at the time.
7% mark:
Me: Holy cow this book is awesome!! I’ve been told that Ellie is a mega twat so I’m prepared!! xx
Jenny: OMG! We've just finalised our review for this one. Ellie....I can't even...twat is the right word but wait until you meet her friend!! Flynn on the other hand stole my heart. Can't wait to hear your thoughts. The writing was wonderful. xx(
Me: Oh YAY!!! I'm equally excited to read y'all's review! It's like eating a box of Godiva chocolates hehe
I got a glimpse of Dania and UGH! Über super mega x infinity twat lol! Oh and the writing is beautiful, totally loving it so far <3 <--- by the way, Dania is Ellie’s best friend and just watch out for
Jenny: OMG! I miss Godiva chocolates lol
Oh geez, you ain't seen nothing yet! I wanted to bitch slap Dania soooo badly! Enjoy! :)
19% mark:
Me: OMG :(
Katy: Oh I have this one, enjoy Feifei :)))
Me: Thanks Katy! Ohhhh this book is making me cry non stop!! :(
Katy: Oh hell, but that's why I love Meredith's books!! Loved her find you in the dark series... I'll be watching out for your updates :))))
Me: Loved that series too! This is really good but it's so heartbreaking >_<
Katy: Ohhhh :((( good luck x
Mysza: That good, huh?
Me: It's so good!!! A heartbreaking story but it's amazing! <3
Mysza: Well then, just one-clicked this one. Thanks for updates, they really encouraged me:)
Me: You're welcome! I just finished it and wow...get the tissues ready! I can't breathe through my nose since its all stuffed lol :) <--- this is me responding after I finished since I ignored Goodreads after this 19% mark
100%mark
Me: I actually finished this 30 mins ago but just sat here crying and crying. My heart hurts. My face hurts from all the crying. And I have to breathe through my mouth because my nose is clogged up.
Claire: I will save this one for at home then.....Nothing worse than crying like a nutter when you are on public transport!!
Me: Definitely save it for home!!!!! I should've thought of that before since I now have to go to work looking like Rudolph the Reindeer :(
Bibliophilia: My kinda book then ;)
Me: Haha ;)
Sim: I was going to start while eating breakfast and waiting for the office computer to fire up. I guess I'd better not - thanks for the heads-up!
Me: LOL! A tearjerker is putting it lightly :/
Claire: Lol, I'm going to start it when I get home this evening :)
Gena: ahh!! so excited for this!!! did you love it Feifei?
Brandi: Lots of crying...I will have to stock up on alcohol and tissues. :)
Jessica: *hugs*
Denisse: oh honey.... I want to read this and cry too. love this author. reading this with my girl Patty later on this week. Sending you big hugs...
Sammy: *hugs*
Jennifer: I'm sorry I didn't give you a heads up about the tears that come with this story :( I didn't know if you were a crier like me when it comes to books!!!!
Baba: *hands tissues* :)
J.B.: This sounds quite interesting. I think I'm not ready for such an intense crying book at the moment. :) Glad you seemed to enjoy it.
Me to Claire: ENJOY!! :D
Me to Gena: I LOVED IT Gena!!! It was really emotional for me but I pulled through! I think you'd like it ;)
Me to Brandi: LOL yes that'd definitely help! I only had my sleeve... ;)
Me to Jessica: ((hugs)) ♥
Me to Denisse: Ooooh y'all are in for a treat! :D ((hugs)) <3
Me to Sammy: ((uber squishy hugs)) :D
Me to Jennifer: Haha no problem!! I'm actually glad you didn't so I could experience it full-force! If you had told me I'd probably sucked up my tears ;) Oh and you're totally right!! This book is awesome! <3
Me to Baba: Thank you Baba!! ♥ ♥
Me to J.B.: Thank you J.B.! I didn't expect it to be so intense and tear-inducing but wouldn't have it any other way! Hope you like it if you read it :D
Mysza: O.M.G. Feifei, I'm at 16% and it sounds so promising, so far it's a great reading!
Me: Yay!!! Hope it continues to be that way! Hugs and kisses ahead of time! ;) ♥
J: Okay I have to ask....(view spoiler) You know me....too many feels aren't good for me. LMAO!
Me: LOL I get you. I can't handle all the feels either and this one took the cake. (view spoiler) Ugh. I still can't breathe through my nose haha ;)
Mysza: Thank God, woof... (thanks for asking J, it's been eating me). <--- you’ll get the woof reference when you read it ;)
Me: Haha! Enjoy :D
Assenette: Ok, I was going to read during my breaks & lunch time, but I see I need to wait until I get home. I'm already feeling nervous and I'm just one chapter in.
:)
Me: Oh definitely a good call! That prologue was something! Enjoy! :D
J: Phew...okay, I can read it then! I think! Thanks friend! :)
Nikki: Snot inducing torture?? Sounds freaking fantastic! Just added it! :)
Me: LMAO!! Haven't heard of that one, brilliant! It is fantastic but puts your emotions through the wringer :/
E: That awesome? Got to get me one of these soonish then :)
Chelsea: Wow fei that good? Can't wait... I wonder if i'm gonna cry coz I haven't cried over a book yet, just slightly teary- eyed but that's it =)
Me: GET IT!!!!!! :D
I didn't think I was going to such a baby but the waterworks started at 7% lol :(
Lisa: Enjjjjjoooooooooy !!!!! You love to torture yourself don't you ? LOL
Me: Thanks dear and LOL!! Had no idea it was a tearjerker haha! A bumpy read but worth it :D
E: Started! Page 7 now. *clutches a box of tissue*
Me: Ahahaha!! Enjoy ;)
So you can see, this book wasn’t just me reading it by myself or only my take from it; I got to fully experience everything this book had to offer with all the above chats and then some...if you’re looking for a highly emotional, life-changing, soul-etching read, I would recommend this one, and while you’re at it, grab some friends and tissues and HAPPY READING!
March 22, 2014
*** FULL REVIEW NOW POSTED *** 4.5 stars
Woah. This was one tough read but it was absolutely beautiful. The emotions that A. Meredith Walters' evokes through her writing make you truly feel as though you are living the story alongside her characters and she writes with such vivid imagery that her words just come to life right before your eyes.
This was the kind of book I wanted to read as slowly as possibly just to enjoy the actual writing itself. However, despite the beautiful writing, this book was not always easy to read. From the moment I read the blurb, I knew this was going to be a heart breaking story but I fully trusted this author to do the story justice. She really earned my trust and respect with her phenomenal Find You In The Dark series where the hero of her story had a mental illness. That story really stayed with me and even now when I think back on it, my heart squeezes. But even more importantly, the way she tacked the difficult subject matter was so respectful that I knew that if there was any author who could tell this story, it was her. Let me explain a little about the story in Reclaiming The Sand here to give you a bit of a background...
Ellie was a girl who'd grown up passed from foster home to foster home, and by high school had ended up in juvie. Now, living in a small, rundown, dead end town with a rap sheet, bad friends, and a quick temper, her propects in life were bleak at best. She'd learned the hard way to put herself first and had built up a reputation as a hot head and a girl no one should mess with.
"My life had beaten all of the good out of me until there was nothing left but the shell of a person I was now."
And then one day, a guy walked back into her town. Freaky Flynn Hendrick. The guy she hadn't seen in six years. The guy she blamed for ruining her life.
But Flynn was a little different than everyone. He had Asperger's -- a form of Autism -- and had many characteristics that made him stand out in society. With no filter between his brain and mouth, an extreme aversion to being touched, and difficulty reading people's emotions, he was easily a target for bullying. Unfortunately though, in the past that bully had most often been Ellie.
She and her friends tormented him endlessly throughout high school -- calling him names, physically hurting him, emotionally crushing him, mocking him, ganging up on him, publicly humiliating him... they heartlessly bullied him day in and day out. But he and Ellie did eventually built a friendship of sorts -- in secret. Until one day, one bad choice brought everything crashing down. That was six years ago.
"I had been weak and pathetic and unwilling to stand up to the people who tormented him, no matter how much I wanted to.
And I had joined in. I had bruised and hurt him. Wounding him with maliciousness that he had never deserved.
I had cared about Flynn. So much….
I had let him in.
And then I had pushed him away in the only way I could.
By destroying him.
And in doing so I had destroyed a part of myself that had only started to flourish in the warmth of his affection.
And these feelings hardened and solidified, freezing my heart and numbed me to everything. Then I had only survived. Only existed.
Until he had reappeared in my life."
In the present day, Flynn kept showing up. Here, there, everywhere. She was drawn to him -- unable to stay away from the boy she blamed for so much and who also filled her with such guilt.
"He reminded me of the girl I had been. One that wasn't angry. That wasn't bitter.
He made me remember a lonely girl who had been drawn to a sad boy and had found comfort in him."
And somehow, despite their past, a beautiful and unlikely love story unfolded...
With chapters flipping back and forth between Ellie and Flynn's POVs, we really got a very complete picture of the situation. I was surprised to find that I actually didn't hate Ellie as much as I thought I would. I mean, there was no doubt that her actions were horrible, selfish, and downright cruel at times, but I think that getting her perspective allowed me to see how much she hated herself too which made me almost pity her more than anything. I won't deny that there were many times when I hated her actions though -- especially during the times when she was aware of how wrong her actions were but didn't stop. I was angry at the way she allowed herself to be pushed around by her friends and peer pressured over and over again. But I was proud when she finally tried to pull herself out of her spiral and make a better life for herself.
"I had focused on the wrong things. The wrong people. And I had paid the price for it.
Maybe this time could be different.
Maybe this time I could be different."
In the alternate POV, the author did a phenomenal job especially of showing us the world through Flynn's eyes. It was impossible not to love him. His blunt honesty, his direct outlook on life, both his strengths and his vulnerabilities, his shy smile, and everything about him just tugged at my heart strings. And with way his chapters were written very much reflected his direct thoughts and feelings allowing us to really connect with the way he saw the world.
"I hate being alone. I want people to talk to me. I want them to like me. It makes me angry when I try to say something and people ignore me. Or worse they laugh.
They call me names. Lots of names. Mean names."
This wasn't a book where there was some sort of magic cure and all the problems just miraculously disappear at the end. Flynn's syndrome was not something that would ever go away -- it was a part of who he was. Between him and Ellie, he would always be more vulnerable, and she would always be strong in many ways. But as we were shown in the book, there were many strengths he had that put him far above everyone else.
"There were never two people more ill suited for a relationship than us. We were all wrong. We didn’t stand a chance.
And that made me want to fight for it even harder."
My heart broke for him over and over again. I loved him for who he was. Just as he was. To everyone else, he was different, abnormal, a freak. But to him... his reality was the only one he'd known. To him, he was normal.
"What's wrong with you?" she asks me and my stomach twists up. Everyone always asks me that. I don't understand why they ask me that."
Gosh, he was just such a beautiful soul. So pure. So full of good. His shy smile, his huge heart, his trust (if sometimes heartbreakingly misplaced), his endless forgiveness, and his love healed a girl who'd become so embittered by life, who'd given into her anger, who'd hurt him, used him, and tormented him, all out of a desperate need to be loved herself.
Their multi layered history made for a very rich, complex dynamic between them. Even before I knew the details of their past, even before it turned romantic, I could feel some sort of close connection between them.
"Both of us were so isolated.
But then we had somehow found each other.
And here we were again. We were still those same disconnected people that we had been years ago, only now a little older and a little more damaged."
I found it interesting to note as an observation that when Flynn had a meltdown or an outburst, it was considered "freaky" to everyone around him because of his "condition" but when one of Ellie's "normal" friends (who honestly just seemed psychotic to me) had an outburst, people just accepted it as "her" and shrugged it off. It was an interesting reflection of the prejudice and double standards rampant in our world.
Falling in line with the nature of the story, the romance between Ellie and Flynn was slow building and very gently paced. But the beautiful writing built the story up in such a way that by the time things began to move beyond just friendship between them, my heart was just fluttering all over the place. It was all portrayed in a very non-explicit fashion, focusing more on the emotional connection shared than on vivid physical descriptions.
"What we shared was so much more than sex. It was an intimacy that came from baring your heart to someone who you knew would take care of it."
My one and only complaint in the whole book was that I felt that the ending was rushed. I already was on edge because of a certain choice Ellie had made towards the end and my poor, bruised heart could really have used a more detailed resolution to help it heal. But please don't get me wrong -- there is a happy ending, but I just would have wanted a little bit more.
Regardless, A. Meredith Walters has shown us once again that she has an extraordinary ability to take difficult topics and present them in a candid, yet deeply respectful manner. Her stories feel real. Believable. I love her writing style, I love the uniqueness of her stories, and I love the effortless grace with which she projects her characters' emotions right onto you. I love that she shows how romance book heroes don't have to be soldiers and fighters, bad boys and millionaires. She shows us with Flynn that a romantic hero can be anyone; that their heart is all that counts.
“He owned me. Completely.
There was no coming back from this.
Flynn had reclaimed me.”
Rating: 4.5 stars
This is a standalone novel.
****************************
For more of my reviews, book news and updates:
✦ Main blog: Aestas Book Blog
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March 14, 2014
I never know if I should rate my own books...because how ego-centric is that? But yeah, well I'm rating it anyway because Flynn and Ellie are very special to me and I hope they'll be special to you too! :-)
November 24, 2014
5 GIMME MORE TISSUES STARS! ★★★★★
"I hated the joy his pain gave me. But it was a power I couldn't have anywhere else."
Having read Lead Me Not by this same author previously and was left feeling underwhelmed, I certainly had my reservations starting her other books. But all hope is not lost when Feifei told me to give this author another shot by rec'ing this one to me and let's face it: Usually when a book sits on Fei's top reads of the year, this book must be doing something helluva right.
And by the definition of helluva right, I certainly did not anticipate how much this book had the power to wreck and hurt me like a badass mothafarker.
Firstly I'd like to emphasize that this is a character-driven story, so plot is rather secondary in this one. And I'm a total sucker for these reads because when it's really done right, it will evoke the most powerful feelings and stripped you raw of all emotions. So believe me when I tell you that before going into this read, you will need:
1. Tissues
2. Punching bag/pillows/buddy support (I had Sandy & Fei, thankiu ladies! ♥)
3. Comfort food/Xanax
4. Tissues. Seriously.
Reclaiming the Sand is the story of Ellie McCallum and Flynn Hendrick, two individuals who seemed to be at polar opposites. One is a bully, the other is the victim. Something happened in the past that set these two apart but to have them reunited again in the present. And this is their story.
Ellie. She's definitely not your typical heroine; she was a bully, she'd done mean and vicious things to Flynn, she was the girl that ruled and roamed the hallway of your school and strike terror with the kids. She is the kind of heroine you'd want to hate and wished you never had the chance to cross paths with.
But here's the thing, I never hated Ellie from the get-go. I'm probably in the absolute minority for saying this, but there was never a moment that I had channel any kind of hatred towards her. If it's anyone I hated in this book, it would be her low-life friends, especially Dania that had me wanting to rip her hair out and throttle her. I'm not saying that I condone Ellie's actions at all because in all honesty, there should be no excuse for such behaviour and the things she did to Flynn were downright awful, so much so that it made me cry for him.
But as much as I cried for Flynn, I cried so much more for Ellie. Flynn having Asperger's would have made him a more prominent victim, but in so many ways, Ellie herself was a larger victim of a cruel upbringing. Growing up in the foster system and being shunned and deprived of love, she never had the sense of belonging and having to live a life where you believe that no one in the world cared for you, THAT for me was profoundly heartbreaking.
Being able to watch Ellie turn her life around in the present, taking that first step towards redemption, it completely made my heart swelled with pure joy and love. In a moment where the author described what she felt when she got her first A on her college paper and the absolute faith that the professor had in her, I completely broke down and cry. Even the tiniest and probably uneventful scenes had me all teary and left me in an absolute blubbering mess. That is exactly how beautifully brilliant the writing was ♥♥
Flynn. Oh my poor baby Flynn. The author gifted us with his POV every now and then and my God...there were times that it was just too painful to read on. The author did a flawless job in delivering Flynn's POV which exuded pure innocence in his thoughts that just melts your heart. But being the first-hand witness of him being bullied and tormented, I can't even begin to explain how difficult it was to stomach reading them. It was like someone stabbing a knife into my gut and twisting it and I can't do anything to stop the torture.
And put these two together, you will get one of THE MOST powerful, beautiful, absolutely heart-wrenching, unconventional love story of the year. I wish I could say I'm exaggerating this but their love story is so remarkable and is a true testament of how love transcends all odds that I'm sitting here teary-eyed even while writing this *sniffs*.
Without a doubt, Reclaiming the Sand will go down as one of my TOP READS FOR 2014. There are books that had me do the ugly cry, but I never had the pleasure of reading one that absolutely leaves me teary and weepy almost the entire way. Don't be mistaken that all were sad anguish tears, but a good portion were happy joyful tears.
The writing is phenomenal, the characters were beautifully flawed and their love story will leave you absolutely breathless. There cannot be enough words to justify how remarkable this read was but you simply just have to read it to experience it. Acceptance, forgiveness and love; A. Meredith Walters delivered a truly exceptional and unforgettable read.
Trust me, if you give Ellie and Flynn a chance, I dare you to not fall in love with their love story ♥♥
Reclaiming the Sand is the first part of a series and can be read as a standalone. The sequel, Chasing the Tide will be out on 16 December 2014 as a continuation of Ellie & Flynn's story.
"I hated the joy his pain gave me. But it was a power I couldn't have anywhere else."
Having read Lead Me Not by this same author previously and was left feeling underwhelmed, I certainly had my reservations starting her other books. But all hope is not lost when Feifei told me to give this author another shot by rec'ing this one to me and let's face it: Usually when a book sits on Fei's top reads of the year, this book must be doing something helluva right.
And by the definition of helluva right, I certainly did not anticipate how much this book had the power to wreck and hurt me like a badass mothafarker.
Firstly I'd like to emphasize that this is a character-driven story, so plot is rather secondary in this one. And I'm a total sucker for these reads because when it's really done right, it will evoke the most powerful feelings and stripped you raw of all emotions. So believe me when I tell you that before going into this read, you will need:
1. Tissues
2. Punching bag/pillows/buddy support (I had Sandy & Fei, thankiu ladies! ♥)
3. Comfort food/Xanax
4. Tissues. Seriously.
Reclaiming the Sand is the story of Ellie McCallum and Flynn Hendrick, two individuals who seemed to be at polar opposites. One is a bully, the other is the victim. Something happened in the past that set these two apart but to have them reunited again in the present. And this is their story.
"Our roles in each other's lives had been to every extreme. Bully and victim. Friend. Champion. Lover."
Ellie. She's definitely not your typical heroine; she was a bully, she'd done mean and vicious things to Flynn, she was the girl that ruled and roamed the hallway of your school and strike terror with the kids. She is the kind of heroine you'd want to hate and wished you never had the chance to cross paths with.
But here's the thing, I never hated Ellie from the get-go. I'm probably in the absolute minority for saying this, but there was never a moment that I had channel any kind of hatred towards her. If it's anyone I hated in this book, it would be her low-life friends, especially Dania that had me wanting to rip her hair out and throttle her. I'm not saying that I condone Ellie's actions at all because in all honesty, there should be no excuse for such behaviour and the things she did to Flynn were downright awful, so much so that it made me cry for him.
But as much as I cried for Flynn, I cried so much more for Ellie. Flynn having Asperger's would have made him a more prominent victim, but in so many ways, Ellie herself was a larger victim of a cruel upbringing. Growing up in the foster system and being shunned and deprived of love, she never had the sense of belonging and having to live a life where you believe that no one in the world cared for you, THAT for me was profoundly heartbreaking.
"And I never said anything to anyone about the way they treated me. I kept it buried deep inside me. I never cried. I never screamed. I never spoke."
Being able to watch Ellie turn her life around in the present, taking that first step towards redemption, it completely made my heart swelled with pure joy and love. In a moment where the author described what she felt when she got her first A on her college paper and the absolute faith that the professor had in her, I completely broke down and cry. Even the tiniest and probably uneventful scenes had me all teary and left me in an absolute blubbering mess. That is exactly how beautifully brilliant the writing was ♥♥
Flynn. Oh my poor baby Flynn. The author gifted us with his POV every now and then and my God...there were times that it was just too painful to read on. The author did a flawless job in delivering Flynn's POV which exuded pure innocence in his thoughts that just melts your heart. But being the first-hand witness of him being bullied and tormented, I can't even begin to explain how difficult it was to stomach reading them. It was like someone stabbing a knife into my gut and twisting it and I can't do anything to stop the torture.
“I hate being alone. I want people to talk to me. I want them to like me. It makes me angry when I try to say something and people ignore me. Or worse they laugh. They call me names. Lots of names. Mean names.”
And put these two together, you will get one of THE MOST powerful, beautiful, absolutely heart-wrenching, unconventional love story of the year. I wish I could say I'm exaggerating this but their love story is so remarkable and is a true testament of how love transcends all odds that I'm sitting here teary-eyed even while writing this *sniffs*.
"I loved him. He had given me a life I never dreamed I could have. He had given me connection and belonging and acceptance. He had become my world."
Without a doubt, Reclaiming the Sand will go down as one of my TOP READS FOR 2014. There are books that had me do the ugly cry, but I never had the pleasure of reading one that absolutely leaves me teary and weepy almost the entire way. Don't be mistaken that all were sad anguish tears, but a good portion were happy joyful tears.
The writing is phenomenal, the characters were beautifully flawed and their love story will leave you absolutely breathless. There cannot be enough words to justify how remarkable this read was but you simply just have to read it to experience it. Acceptance, forgiveness and love; A. Meredith Walters delivered a truly exceptional and unforgettable read.
Trust me, if you give Ellie and Flynn a chance, I dare you to not fall in love with their love story ♥♥
Reclaiming the Sand is the first part of a series and can be read as a standalone. The sequel, Chasing the Tide will be out on 16 December 2014 as a continuation of Ellie & Flynn's story.
August 4, 2014
4.5 Reclaiming Stars
[image error]
*Please note this story has some truly heartbreaking scenes*
I had no doubts that A. Meredith Walters could deliver an Asperger lead male and an Reactive Attachment Disorder heroine. This story was indeed well done! I think readers will feel Flynn’s pain -- but I think more light should have been given to Ellie’s disorder. I am noticing that some friends are struggling to empathize with her. Ellie's disorder is real, and unlike Flynn who had a caring mother no one ever helped Ellie with her issues.
This story is told mostly in Ellie’s pov with a few chapters in Flynn pov. The story takes place in the present but we are given insight to Flynn and Ellie's high school past. (I found Ellie’s pursuit of a relationship in the present truly ballsy. I feel the majority of people would have steered clear of him after what she put him through out of shame. I'm guessing her disorder played a part in this.)
Ellie is on the cusp of either staying the partying route to nowhere or trying her hand at a college future when this story begins. Flynn walks back into town and the story gets exciting. Ellie’s feelings for Flynn resurface as do the regret for her actions that landed her a two year stay in a juvenile dentition center.
”My desperate need to feel wanted had twisted into something horrific. And I had ended up hurting the one person I had wanted in my life.”
This is the story of a girl who finds a connection with a ‘freak’ that her so called friends brutally bully. Ellie doesn’t stand up for Flynn and sends him so many mixed signals. She not only laughs at the bullying but also is the instigater many times.
”And I feel sad when Ellie is mean to me. When she is with her friends she is just as mean as they are.”
Flynn was beautiful inside and out. He was forgiving, he was kind, he was talented and he truly was everything Ellie needed in a friend and partner.
Flynn and Ellie’s path cross in town and at the community college. They start their friendship up once again. I enjoyed Flynn and Ellie’s renewed relationship and swooned over their baby stepping to so much more.
[image error]
The ending was abrupt for me and I'm wondering if there will be novella in the future. I for one would like to know more about Ellie and Flynn. I would LOVE for Ellie to have a scene with Kevin, Flynn's therapist.
[image error]
*Please note this story has some truly heartbreaking scenes*
I had no doubts that A. Meredith Walters could deliver an Asperger lead male and an Reactive Attachment Disorder heroine. This story was indeed well done! I think readers will feel Flynn’s pain -- but I think more light should have been given to Ellie’s disorder. I am noticing that some friends are struggling to empathize with her. Ellie's disorder is real, and unlike Flynn who had a caring mother no one ever helped Ellie with her issues.
This story is told mostly in Ellie’s pov with a few chapters in Flynn pov. The story takes place in the present but we are given insight to Flynn and Ellie's high school past. (I found Ellie’s pursuit of a relationship in the present truly ballsy. I feel the majority of people would have steered clear of him after what she put him through out of shame. I'm guessing her disorder played a part in this.)
Ellie is on the cusp of either staying the partying route to nowhere or trying her hand at a college future when this story begins. Flynn walks back into town and the story gets exciting. Ellie’s feelings for Flynn resurface as do the regret for her actions that landed her a two year stay in a juvenile dentition center.
”My desperate need to feel wanted had twisted into something horrific. And I had ended up hurting the one person I had wanted in my life.”
This is the story of a girl who finds a connection with a ‘freak’ that her so called friends brutally bully. Ellie doesn’t stand up for Flynn and sends him so many mixed signals. She not only laughs at the bullying but also is the instigater many times.
”And I feel sad when Ellie is mean to me. When she is with her friends she is just as mean as they are.”
Flynn was beautiful inside and out. He was forgiving, he was kind, he was talented and he truly was everything Ellie needed in a friend and partner.
Flynn and Ellie’s path cross in town and at the community college. They start their friendship up once again. I enjoyed Flynn and Ellie’s renewed relationship and swooned over their baby stepping to so much more.
[image error]
The ending was abrupt for me and I'm wondering if there will be novella in the future. I for one would like to know more about Ellie and Flynn. I would LOVE for Ellie to have a scene with Kevin, Flynn's therapist.
September 24, 2014
+5 Beautiful,Emotional stars
"We were a perfect,messed up pair,
Flynn and I."
Such a beautiful story! I wish I could give it more than 5 stars!! This book was perfection!
It was so intense, emotional, heartbreaking, captivating, sweet, beautiful, romantic, unique and realistic! There are so many words to describe how much I loved it!!! This book did something to my heart...really I couldn't stop crying! I decided that I like this author a lot! And after reading another book of hers I can say that she prefers to use anti heroe in her books and this is what makes them so realistic!
This story is about Flynn and Ellie...
"Bully and victim.
Friend.
Companion.
Champion.
Lover."
Flynn has Aspergers and people at school treat him bad because of this. Especially Ellie and her friends. But Ellie when she was alone she spent time with Flynn. Flynn thought Ellie was his friend...So you can understand how it was when you see someone you supposed to be your friend treat you bad...
After years they meet again...But now Ellie starts to see things different..and she wants to give more in her friendship with Flynn...
First of all I would like to say that at the beginning I hate Ellie's friends so much, they were so mean and bad..And sometimes I feel the same for Ellie. But the author managed to make me also feel sorry for her..And after some facts and after trying to know her more I can say that I forgave her in the end.. Omg my heart is bleeding for Flynn...poor Flynn..This moment I write my review I also cry...because I can't stop thinking how people treat him...
Sometimes I wonder...Are there really so mean people??And why twould they do this?
Their moments together were so cute and sweet and so innocent at the beginning.
"You want to be
with me and I want to be with you.
We belong together."
I'm not sure if my heart will recover soon...I finished yesterday and still thinking about this story....
Please give it a try...it's so powerful, beautiful and unique!
And it could better to read this book when you are in a good place...because it will break your hearts...
You will need Kleenex!!!
"We were a perfect,messed up pair,
Flynn and I."
Such a beautiful story! I wish I could give it more than 5 stars!! This book was perfection!
It was so intense, emotional, heartbreaking, captivating, sweet, beautiful, romantic, unique and realistic! There are so many words to describe how much I loved it!!! This book did something to my heart...really I couldn't stop crying! I decided that I like this author a lot! And after reading another book of hers I can say that she prefers to use anti heroe in her books and this is what makes them so realistic!
This story is about Flynn and Ellie...
"Bully and victim.
Friend.
Companion.
Champion.
Lover."
Flynn has Aspergers and people at school treat him bad because of this. Especially Ellie and her friends. But Ellie when she was alone she spent time with Flynn. Flynn thought Ellie was his friend...So you can understand how it was when you see someone you supposed to be your friend treat you bad...
After years they meet again...But now Ellie starts to see things different..and she wants to give more in her friendship with Flynn...
First of all I would like to say that at the beginning I hate Ellie's friends so much, they were so mean and bad..And sometimes I feel the same for Ellie. But the author managed to make me also feel sorry for her..And after some facts and after trying to know her more I can say that I forgave her in the end.. Omg my heart is bleeding for Flynn...poor Flynn..This moment I write my review I also cry...because I can't stop thinking how people treat him...
Sometimes I wonder...Are there really so mean people??And why twould they do this?
Their moments together were so cute and sweet and so innocent at the beginning.
"You want to be
with me and I want to be with you.
We belong together."
I'm not sure if my heart will recover soon...I finished yesterday and still thinking about this story....
Please give it a try...it's so powerful, beautiful and unique!
And it could better to read this book when you are in a good place...because it will break your hearts...
You will need Kleenex!!!
February 4, 2015
Update~Spotlight on Febrary 4th 2015:
CHARACTER AND AUTHOR SPOTLIGHT: Flynn Hendrick from Reclaiming the sand by .Meredith Walters:Q&A **GIVEAWAY**
http://www.slutsistas.blogspot.co.uk/...
Enter the Giveaway here~ http://on.fb.me/1zIt7uV
WOW 5***** STARS
What a profoundly AMAZING read, there is so many great Reviews already for this one I'm going to just write some of my thoughts. This is the kind of book that starts off cold but warms your heart the more you read and get into. It is gripping touching and if there was EVER a hero in a book Flynn sure is one.
This is about a girl who is in a group of friends that bully a boy named Flynn who has Asperger's syndrome who ends up falling for a boy with such disability and to me this is a story about how maybe in society is deemed as not right?? mmm maybe more that in school its deemed as odd and therefore Ellie turns into Flynn's Bully just like the others.
Ellie has been brought up in the foster care system she knows only how to survive in that she drinks, she has a temper and she works in a shop its a daily routine she knows inside and out but that's her life, but then there's Flynn the boy that makes her heart do somersaults and he makes her nervous and he also makes her FEEL which is so not like her she doesn't feel she just does so she becomes just like the gang she has been part of for such a long time. A BULLY.
Ahhh our Boy Flynn I have so much to say about him, firstly he has Asperger's I know I know I've already said that but let me say this ~ Meredith Walters has done her research concerning the subject matter, Flynn is the kind of hero you do nothing but fall for. Flynn has routines he doesn't understand mannerisms, reactions (although is trying in current times to work them out concerning Ellie) he may not understand why people are laughing, are they being funny or are they being cruel? In society people don't understand the Autism spectrum I'd say he's just mis-understood, in school he's an easy target and that is what he becomes with Ellie's friends. He becomes the guy to take the pain away from then someone to blame the issues on and the one people just want to ignore cause they don't understand how to react to him. He's the target for ALL in many ways so get your tissues ready cause this sure will make you cry.
Flynn is the kind of person that touches you right in the middle of your heart, he's so very refreshing he is very pure innocent and just so beautiful the kind of soul you just don't want to taint the kind of person that you just don't want to see any harm come to, he see's the good in everyone and is easy to forgive I just can't explain him enough he's the hero that you want to hug knowing that he doesn't want that hug. A gentle spirit.
But he doesn't know how to explain himself to show emotion and when he is needed he just can't give, saying that he shows himself in other ways little gestures little parts of him that others don't ~ see Ellie does.
Ellie in time starts to see life differently and wants to better herself there is lots of obstacles in their way, but Flynn see's what's in Ellie that others don't. I LOVED reading the PRESENT but I hurt in the PAST. This story takes you back in time to when Flynn was bullied as a teenager to Present where he gains strength and begins to see the differences in things and makes an effort to do what he is not so comfortable with mmm maybe fight even for his voice to be heard yet he still has Asperger's so he still has misunderstandings but he does start to gain control in his choices.
And Flynn see's the good in Ellie where as others don't. Two different people, two different personalities, two separate goals except LOVE IS LOVE and the HEART knows what the HEART WANTS~ this statement is sooo true and I fell for this story 100%.
So was it easy to read? NO it hurt but it made me happy and smile and at times laugh too so yes enjoyable.
Would I recommend this story? Yes yes I just love Meredith's writing her descriptive words, emotions and subject matters that are REAL and NORMAL and HEARTWARMING.
READ IT~THAT IS ALL!!!
CHARACTER AND AUTHOR SPOTLIGHT: Flynn Hendrick from Reclaiming the sand by .Meredith Walters:Q&A **GIVEAWAY**
http://www.slutsistas.blogspot.co.uk/...
Enter the Giveaway here~ http://on.fb.me/1zIt7uV
WOW 5***** STARS
What a profoundly AMAZING read, there is so many great Reviews already for this one I'm going to just write some of my thoughts. This is the kind of book that starts off cold but warms your heart the more you read and get into. It is gripping touching and if there was EVER a hero in a book Flynn sure is one.
This is about a girl who is in a group of friends that bully a boy named Flynn who has Asperger's syndrome who ends up falling for a boy with such disability and to me this is a story about how maybe in society is deemed as not right?? mmm maybe more that in school its deemed as odd and therefore Ellie turns into Flynn's Bully just like the others.
Ellie has been brought up in the foster care system she knows only how to survive in that she drinks, she has a temper and she works in a shop its a daily routine she knows inside and out but that's her life, but then there's Flynn the boy that makes her heart do somersaults and he makes her nervous and he also makes her FEEL which is so not like her she doesn't feel she just does so she becomes just like the gang she has been part of for such a long time. A BULLY.
Ahhh our Boy Flynn I have so much to say about him, firstly he has Asperger's I know I know I've already said that but let me say this ~ Meredith Walters has done her research concerning the subject matter, Flynn is the kind of hero you do nothing but fall for. Flynn has routines he doesn't understand mannerisms, reactions (although is trying in current times to work them out concerning Ellie) he may not understand why people are laughing, are they being funny or are they being cruel? In society people don't understand the Autism spectrum I'd say he's just mis-understood, in school he's an easy target and that is what he becomes with Ellie's friends. He becomes the guy to take the pain away from then someone to blame the issues on and the one people just want to ignore cause they don't understand how to react to him. He's the target for ALL in many ways so get your tissues ready cause this sure will make you cry.
Flynn is the kind of person that touches you right in the middle of your heart, he's so very refreshing he is very pure innocent and just so beautiful the kind of soul you just don't want to taint the kind of person that you just don't want to see any harm come to, he see's the good in everyone and is easy to forgive I just can't explain him enough he's the hero that you want to hug knowing that he doesn't want that hug. A gentle spirit.
But he doesn't know how to explain himself to show emotion and when he is needed he just can't give, saying that he shows himself in other ways little gestures little parts of him that others don't ~ see Ellie does.
Ellie in time starts to see life differently and wants to better herself there is lots of obstacles in their way, but Flynn see's what's in Ellie that others don't. I LOVED reading the PRESENT but I hurt in the PAST. This story takes you back in time to when Flynn was bullied as a teenager to Present where he gains strength and begins to see the differences in things and makes an effort to do what he is not so comfortable with mmm maybe fight even for his voice to be heard yet he still has Asperger's so he still has misunderstandings but he does start to gain control in his choices.
And Flynn see's the good in Ellie where as others don't. Two different people, two different personalities, two separate goals except LOVE IS LOVE and the HEART knows what the HEART WANTS~ this statement is sooo true and I fell for this story 100%.
So was it easy to read? NO it hurt but it made me happy and smile and at times laugh too so yes enjoyable.
Would I recommend this story? Yes yes I just love Meredith's writing her descriptive words, emotions and subject matters that are REAL and NORMAL and HEARTWARMING.
READ IT~THAT IS ALL!!!
November 16, 2014
Title: Reclaiming The Sand
Series: Standalone.
Author: A Meredith Walters
Release Date: March 17th, 2014
Rating: 3.5 stars
Cliffhanger:. No
HEA:
Reclaiming Sand was a rough and bumpy ride for me. I’m still not sure how should I express my opinion about what I’ve read. It certainly was a beautiful and heart wrenching story. It was definitely something original, eye-opening and… brutal. The writing, the characters, the plot were flawless. However, this book was just not exactly for me. Why? I explain in just a second.
Firstly, I had a very strong hate relationship with the main character, Ellie; for most part of the book I despised her. I couldn’t stand her bitchy behavior, her closed minded actions and hurtful streak. She was rude, she was insolent and vulgar. She was happy when someone else was hurt.. and what nailed me to believe she’s not worth Flynn’s love is her constant bitching how life was bad for her. I wanted to yell at her that she’s not the only one that had hard life. Does having rough upbringing mean that you have to make other miserable? In her book it was a great excuse, in mine? Not so much.
I also hated the people she hung out with. I hated them so much, I have the strong urge to write a 1000 words why they were horrible human beings without morals or heart, but don’t worry I’ll try not to let myself loose like that. Dania was the worst woman in the whole world and I wanted to cry out in frustration every time her disgusting behavior influenced her unborn baby. It was horrific to see how selfish and stupid she was. I hope I will never meet a real person like her in my life. She was a poison that needed to be sucked out of Ellie’s life along with the rest of the creepy crew.
Flynn wasn’t a great romantic hero I could fall in love with. On the contrary, he made me feel everything but passion, love or desire I normally feel toward hero. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not because of Asperger’s! He was the most loving, beautiful, tender and sweet person. I felt bad for him, I wanted to be his friend and help him out, but I didn’t get the ‘fall in love with, drop your panties’ vibe. And I feel very bad about it. He just did nothing to wake up my hormones or butterflies in my stomach. I know it probably will sound bad, but he was, in my eyes more of a sixteen year old teen through all the book, because I didn’t get to see inside his head while he was older.
It was hard for me to connect with the characters. I wasn’t a great fan of them and it certainly influenced my overall enjoyment and rating. I just didn’t find them captivating and appealing. Their story was perfect in its own way, but it was not a romance that swept me off my feet, it was the journey of two broken people that touched me.
Summing up, Reclaiming Sand is one of those books that holds a lot of appeal, and for many readers the magic that contain the pages will be enough to mesmerize and make them fall in love with this exceptional story. If it does make any sense to you all I loved it, I really did, but not in my usual way. It was heartbreaking, beautiful and touching and worth all the pain suffered during it.
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September 22, 2014
4.5 Stars
This was such a tough read, but it was worth it. Reclaiming the Sand is an emotional story, it's unquie and beautifully written. Told from both Ellie (present) and Flynn's (past) POV.
Ellie McCallum is a bully. She is a product of the foster care system. Angry and disconnected, she doesn't care about anyone. At 15 she meets Flynn and her life is changed. Now at 22, Flynn enters her life again.
I had cared about Flynn. So much. It had scared me. I was terrified to feel anything for anyone. I had spent most of my life shutting everyone out. I hadn’t a defense against a quite boy who was just as lost as I was. I had opened up. I had let him in. And then I had pushed him away in the only way I could. By destroying him.
Flynn Hendrick has Asperger’s syndrome. During high school he was the victim of Ellie and her friends constant teasing. But he was drawn to Ellie and they end up developing a 'secret' friendship outside of school. Flynn's flashback POV's, gutted me, I was in tears a few times. He struggles to understand why Ellie is his friend sometimes, and then mean to him. But he always forgives her.
I hate being alone. I want people to talk to me. I want them to like me. It makes me angry when I try to say something and people ignore me. Or worse they laugh. They call me names. Lots of names. Mean names.
With Flynn back in town and Ellie trying to make some positive changes in her life, will these two find their way back to each other?
I loved experiencing the developing relationship between these two. It was beautiful and healing. And while Ellie was difficult to like at times, I found myself invested in her, as well as Flynn. This was truly a remarkable story.
Flynn Hendrick has taught me how to feel. He had taught me how to live. He had taught me how to love.
This was such a tough read, but it was worth it. Reclaiming the Sand is an emotional story, it's unquie and beautifully written. Told from both Ellie (present) and Flynn's (past) POV.
Ellie McCallum is a bully. She is a product of the foster care system. Angry and disconnected, she doesn't care about anyone. At 15 she meets Flynn and her life is changed. Now at 22, Flynn enters her life again.
I had cared about Flynn. So much. It had scared me. I was terrified to feel anything for anyone. I had spent most of my life shutting everyone out. I hadn’t a defense against a quite boy who was just as lost as I was. I had opened up. I had let him in. And then I had pushed him away in the only way I could. By destroying him.
Flynn Hendrick has Asperger’s syndrome. During high school he was the victim of Ellie and her friends constant teasing. But he was drawn to Ellie and they end up developing a 'secret' friendship outside of school. Flynn's flashback POV's, gutted me, I was in tears a few times. He struggles to understand why Ellie is his friend sometimes, and then mean to him. But he always forgives her.
I hate being alone. I want people to talk to me. I want them to like me. It makes me angry when I try to say something and people ignore me. Or worse they laugh. They call me names. Lots of names. Mean names.
With Flynn back in town and Ellie trying to make some positive changes in her life, will these two find their way back to each other?
I loved experiencing the developing relationship between these two. It was beautiful and healing. And while Ellie was difficult to like at times, I found myself invested in her, as well as Flynn. This was truly a remarkable story.
Flynn Hendrick has taught me how to feel. He had taught me how to live. He had taught me how to love.
March 18, 2014
Heart-breaking, excruciating, inspiring, beautiful and unforgettable!
5 STARS FOR ELLIE & FLYNN!
Oh goodness, this book was tough. Like, really tough. I really, really struggled to read some of the scenes and I know some of you are going to totally balk at this. There are some real extreme bullying scenes in this book and to be honest, sometimes I just wanted to shut my Kindle off and walk away. I just couldn't deal with it.
I hate being alone. I want people to talk to me. I want them to like me. It makes me angry when I try to say something and people ignore me. Or worse they laugh.
They call me names. Lots of names. Mean names.
But although this book totally broke my heart, it was worth every bit of pain! I absolutely loved it.
Freaky Flynn Hendrick has Asperger's. I'll explain a little more about that in a second. He is noticeably different to all of the other kids at school.
Ellie McCallum has had it tough. She's grown up in foster care, been abused, abandoned and locked up and she's hardened, cold and cruel. Nobody messes with Ellie and her friends. And if they do, they can expect a face full of fist.
Flynn is an easy target. Ellie and her friends make his life a living hell. They tease him, they push him around, they call him names and they bully him in every way imaginable. And then Ellie finds herself falling into a very unlikely friendship with the local oddball and a battle with her conscience and her long-standing hardass ways begins.
Flynn is one of the most vulnerable, loveable, heart-melting book characters I have ever read. I just wanted to scoop him up and protect him from everything life might ever throw at him. He suffers with Asperger syndrome.
Asperger's, is an autism spectrum disorder (ASD) that is characterized by significant difficulties in social interaction and nonverbal communication, alongside restricted and repetitive patterns of behavior and interests.
Flynn is socially awkward, he has absolutely no filter between his brain and his mouth. If Flynn thinks someone, he'll let you know. Now, I know this can make him seem totally rude at times, but I found this totally endearing and very comical at times! I just adored Flynn. There aren't enough words to explain how much he warmed my heart.
And then there is Ellie. Ellie's character is a tricky one. I absolutely hated some of the things she not only stood by and watched her friends do to Flynn, but even actually joined in with. That is what I found so hard to read and I know that some of you just won't be able to tolerate the level of bullying in this book. It hurt. Like, physically hurt my chest, to read some of it.
You will detest the choices that I have made.
You won't understand me at all.
However, there were times when I really liked Ellie, and really felt for her, too. Ellie has had a terrible up-bringing. She's had no real guidance, no role model, nobody teaching her right from wrong, and she's developed a defensive, aggressive persona to survive. She's not just in with the wrong crowd, Ellie McCallum is the wrong crowd. But after a stint in juvie, and as she begins to recognise what's really important in life, she makes an effort to change her ways and her future. I enjoyed watching this change in her. And I loved how she felt for Flynn.
I had never loved anyone before but now I loved with my whole being.
It split me open.
My guts spilled out on the floor at Flynn's feet.
He owned me. Completely.
There was no coming back from this.
Flynn had reclaimed me.
The reason I think Ellie is tolerable, despite her actions, is because she is so real. Y'know, she is a total bitch, but A. Meredith Walters explains her character so well that you kind of can't help but feel a bit sorry for her. I mean, there is no excuse for bullying, but she's got this real 'attack to defend' mentality, this in-built survival instinct that she has developed over so many years of hardship. And underneath it all is a good person. And the truth is that there are so many young people out there like that. People that just don't know how to deal with real life and the tragedy that is their existence, so they lash out and they create this hateful, hard, ruthless persona to hide their sadness and their short-comings. That's how I felt Ellie was. She couldn't really deal with life, so instead she made other people feel small to fit in with the only friends she has and to make herself feel bigger. She uses drugs and alcohol to numb her mind from her pathetic, repetitive existence. And she rebels against any kind of authority or rule implementation. But she knows no different. And once she starts to mature and realises that she does have other options, she begins to change.
And also, I think part of what makes this book so emotional is that no, you can't really forgive Ellie for everything she did. But life moves on, people change and, though we can't change the things we've done in the past, all we can do is try and change the direction of our future and try to make good choices from here on in. And another thing I took from this book was that it takes a certain strength and pure, unbridled goodness in a person to be able to forgive and love, regardless.
A. Meredith Walters has had first hand experience, working with troubled teens with mental health problems and troubled lives, so you can rest assured that you will always get an accurate account of the obstacles and issues that these young people face, with her books. Her books are raw and emotive. They pull you in and consume you. They always draw out such intense emotions from me and I feel like I could very possibly be reading a story based on somebodies real life experiences.
The book flips between Ellie and Flynn's POVs. Flynn tells us the story of the past, from his perspective, when they were teenagers in high school. And Ellie narrates the here and now. I loved the chapters from Flynn's POV. His narrative is so simplistic, so black and white. He thinks in basic, obvious sentences. There is no mind games or beating around the bush, with Flynn. He doesn't know how to lie and he totally doesn't get sarcasm or figures of speech. He takes everything literally and at face value, and it's utterly adorable.
"Thanks," I muttered, rubbing my nose.
"You're welcome," he said, my sarcasm lost on him as always.
The romance between Ellie and Flynn will melt you from the inside out. It's slow building and so pure. As we know, Flynn says how he feels, so we always know exactly what he is thinking. And this includes his thoughts on Ellie's appearance, on what makes him happy, what makes him mad, on kissing, on touching Ellie's boobs! It really made me giggle and just added to Flynn's appeal. Honestly ladies, forget being dominated by all of our sexy, controlling Alphas; you will all just want to spend the rest of your lives loving Flynn Hendrick, protecting him and teaching him the ways of the world.
"You don't want me with anyone else?"
"No! People that love each other don't do that with anyone else."
This book breaks all of the romance novel stereotypes. It throws the rule book away and writes one all of it's own. We have a defenceless, victimised hero and a cruel, bad-ass, hardened heroine. And at no point do their roles reverse. Flynn's disability means that he is and always will be the vulnerable one, the one that needs help, that has trouble with every day life and Ellie will always be the decision maker, the protector and the stronger, more capable partner.
We've already witnessed A. Meredith Walter's talent for engaging a reader with her seamless writing, with the very popular Find You in the Dark series. And she absolutely achieves the same effect with Reclaiming the Sand. I love the way she writes, the way she brings the characters to life and the way you can visualise every location and every scene. Again, I'd have loved to see more of this in terms of how this would affect them as a couple, moving forward with their life.
And that made me want to fight for it even harder.
This book has a beautiful happy ending. I was a bit nervous, as I neared the end of the book, that we weren't going to get there. But we did, and it was just gorgeous. If there's anything I'd have changed, it would have been to have a little more insight into the hurdles Flynn and Ellie would face as a couple when building their future. But that really is my only complaint. Everything else was flawless.
If you are prepared to wade through the darkness and the pain, I highly recommend this book. You will be rewarded with a story that makes you feel from the very depths of your heart and characters that will climb right into your soul!
Have you read it? Tell us what you thought?
'Reclaiming the Sand' Statistics
• Steam Rating (out of 5): ♥♥
• Ending: Happy ending
• POV: Alternates between Ellie & Flynn.
• Narrative: First person. Past tense.
• Series: ✗
• Can this be read as a standalone? Yes
• Themes:
Asperger's
Bullying
• Writing: Fantastic
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August 31, 2016
This is a story about a girl named Ellie and about a boy named Flynn. Ellie is broken, Ellie is damaged, she is a „product” of foster care system, she is mean, vicious, cruel and violent. She is bully. Flynn has Asperger’s syndrome, Flynn has problem with communicating, he is shy, he is quiet, he is reserved. He is Freaky Flynn (and OMG my heart was breaking everytime I read that insult in the book). Somehow, by chance, Ellie gets to know him and their acquaintance grows into friendship, but the friendship she tries to hide. You would think she stops bullying him after that, well you would think wrong. She is weak and pathetic, she not only lets her so called friends humiliate and hurt him, but she joins in. She is his enemy at school, calling him names, laughing at him, and she is his friend afterwards, spending time at his house.
Flynn doesn't understand what she's doing to him, he is incapable of reading people's hidden motives or deceitfulness, he takes world as it is, he trusts her. She keeps hurting him, he keeps believing in her.
Ellie has never been loved and she has never loved anyone. She hates the world and herself so much that she destroys the only true relationship she has ever had, too scarred to finally care about someone. Her actions lead to horrible accident after which they go their separate ways.
But seven years pass and their paths cross once again. Flynn is back and Ellie finally awakes from numbness in her life. Slowly they build their relationship all over again. And this time it's not only friendship, it's love. And it's beautiful. Seeing Flynn struggling with everyday life really breaks your heart but it also makes you happy that in spite of his limitations he is pure, he is good, he is worthy of love. And as much as I hated Ellie in the beginning, my feelings changed in the second part of the book. I think she really redeemed herself by being patient, attentive and understanding, but most of all by loving him unconditionally. She simply grew up.
And the intimacy? Their first kiss? Their first touching? Their first love making? Let's just say I had goosebumps while reading those scenes.
I simply adored this book. It has remarkable writing style. I was a little worried in the beginning how the author will deal with Flynn's POV, not necessarily, as it turned out. She did a great job capturing Flynn's behaviour, which must have been hard considering his Asperger's syndrome. I didn't feel like reading a book, I felt like listening to him, like being inside his head. But what I loved the most were the peaceful and tranquil feelings while reading it, I savored this book. The story wasn't that important to me, it was the way it was delivered that really touched me. Amazing, beautiful, heartbreaking, but full of hope and finally happiness, great job Mrs. Walters.
I must agree on one thing with my friends though. The ending was rushed, and since there is information in the blurb that this a standalone I feel like I'll be missing the end of the story.
October 6, 2014
Whoa, this book made me uncomfortable reading it. A couple of reasons why:
(1) As a mom, you want your child to fit in and belong. And watching Flynn not fit in was painful. The constant bullying by a group of kids hurt my heart.
(2) As a former teen and now having 3 of my own, I know how hard it is to stand up against the crowd and stop others from tearing down someone who is different from the 'norm.' Sometimes it’s just easier to go with the crowd, even if it’s NOT the right decision.
Reclaiming the Sand is about Ellie and Flynn and learning to be okay with who you are.
Ellie has been released from jail for a past transgression and now is trying to figure out where she fits in. Having grown up unwanted and unloved she has been diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder. Her label does nothing to make her any more lovable or easier to deal with. She’s a hot headed, selfish person who has an inability to empathize with others. I was not a fan of hers but as the story neared the end I softened to her, just a little bit.
Flynn is different from his peers. Because of his awkwardness he’s considered a weirdo and a freak. The thing that sets him apart from others is his Aspergers (a form of autism). Social cues are not something he understands and he doesn’t know how to be anything but honest.
The constant humiliation that Ellie and her band of misfit "friends" bestows on Flynn, both as a teenager and as an adult, was realistic feeling and made me cringe to see such calculated cruelty. I wanted John Quinones from “What Would You Do?” to appear and question the people who stood by and let this abuse take place. Make them examine themselves on why we as a society turn a blind eye to this sort of “teasing.” As a mother of teens, I hope my teens are not the ones joining in on this type of mob mentality. Okay, sorry, I got sidetracked.
Ellie grows from being a bully to a friend for Flynn. She becomes his champion and he hers and eventually they become lovers. I’m not going to lie and say it was easy to read about their situation because it wasn’t. This is a story about forgiveness, redemption and finding love in the most unlikely of places. The hurt is very real and painful to read but also a very powerful and beautiful story. One that we can all relate to; either as the bully, victim or the bystander.
While I mentioned this book made me uncomfortable to read, I still would recommend it to everyone. We need to be pushed outside of our comfort zone. Next time we see a “Flynn” or “Ellie” we should step in and be the difference we want to see with our world.
“Reclaiming the Sand” is my first A. Meredith Walters book but it won’t be my last. I loved the writing and the way the words pulled you into the story. I will be reading the continuation of Ellie & Flynn's story in the new book coming out 12/16/2014.
SPECIAL $0.99 SALE UNTIL: 12/16/2014
Order: http://amzn.to/1vxn6f8
$.99 until the release of Chasing the Tide (12/16/2014)
SERIES:
Continuing story.
**Complimentary copy in exchange for an honest review.**
(1) As a mom, you want your child to fit in and belong. And watching Flynn not fit in was painful. The constant bullying by a group of kids hurt my heart.
(2) As a former teen and now having 3 of my own, I know how hard it is to stand up against the crowd and stop others from tearing down someone who is different from the 'norm.' Sometimes it’s just easier to go with the crowd, even if it’s NOT the right decision.
Reclaiming the Sand is about Ellie and Flynn and learning to be okay with who you are.
Ellie has been released from jail for a past transgression and now is trying to figure out where she fits in. Having grown up unwanted and unloved she has been diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder. Her label does nothing to make her any more lovable or easier to deal with. She’s a hot headed, selfish person who has an inability to empathize with others. I was not a fan of hers but as the story neared the end I softened to her, just a little bit.
Flynn is different from his peers. Because of his awkwardness he’s considered a weirdo and a freak. The thing that sets him apart from others is his Aspergers (a form of autism). Social cues are not something he understands and he doesn’t know how to be anything but honest.
The constant humiliation that Ellie and her band of misfit "friends" bestows on Flynn, both as a teenager and as an adult, was realistic feeling and made me cringe to see such calculated cruelty. I wanted John Quinones from “What Would You Do?” to appear and question the people who stood by and let this abuse take place. Make them examine themselves on why we as a society turn a blind eye to this sort of “teasing.” As a mother of teens, I hope my teens are not the ones joining in on this type of mob mentality. Okay, sorry, I got sidetracked.
Ellie grows from being a bully to a friend for Flynn. She becomes his champion and he hers and eventually they become lovers. I’m not going to lie and say it was easy to read about their situation because it wasn’t. This is a story about forgiveness, redemption and finding love in the most unlikely of places. The hurt is very real and painful to read but also a very powerful and beautiful story. One that we can all relate to; either as the bully, victim or the bystander.
While I mentioned this book made me uncomfortable to read, I still would recommend it to everyone. We need to be pushed outside of our comfort zone. Next time we see a “Flynn” or “Ellie” we should step in and be the difference we want to see with our world.
“Reclaiming the Sand” is my first A. Meredith Walters book but it won’t be my last. I loved the writing and the way the words pulled you into the story. I will be reading the continuation of Ellie & Flynn's story in the new book coming out 12/16/2014.
SPECIAL $0.99 SALE UNTIL: 12/16/2014
Order: http://amzn.to/1vxn6f8
$.99 until the release of Chasing the Tide (12/16/2014)
SERIES:
Continuing story.
**Complimentary copy in exchange for an honest review.**
March 19, 2016
"5 Second chance stars"
You will hate me.
You will love him.
I love him.
He has changed my world.
This quote got me so intrigued I had to dive in to know more about this bully and her victim. Yes! I hated Ellie for better part of this book for tormenting Flynn when they were in high school but when I got the insight of real Ellie, I sympathized for her.
Ellie had a rough life growing up, she was abandoned by her mother at the young age of six since then she was under foster care, despite taken by different foster homes she never felt loved or wanted. She grew up being strong, violent, temperamental and emotionally deranged. With the company of her shallow irresponsible friends she became an anti-social person seeking drugs, alcohol and meaningless sex to cover her remorse.
But there was one person who saw Ellie for what she was and not for what she became. And that’s Flynn Hendrick. Flynn recently moved to Wellston and enrolled in same school as Ellie and her friends. Flynn suffers from Asperger’s, which made him a potent target for bullying. But somehow Ellie couldn't resist the kindness in him, there’s a budding friendship between the two. Ellie finds herself in situation where she can’t express her true feeling about Flynn at the same time she didn't want her friends to know this side of her.
I hated everything what Ellie and her asshole friends did to Flynn, not once not twice but every fucking time they had to pick on him, call him names, make fun of him. I swear to god I so wanted to punch Stu, Dania, Shane and Ellie, especially Ellie for making his life miserable. Even then Flynn ALWAYS forgave her! Why?! because that’s how kind hearted he is, There is no shades of gray in his life it’s just black and white.
“He sees the beauty where others don’t. He hears love when others only hear pain. He gives me the strength to become the person I've been terrified to be.”
Besides Ellie was the only friend he had, every time she bullied him he was confused and angry but later she would apologize and spend time with him and that’s enough to make him like her again. She never felt any kind of emotions for anyone, she spent most of her life shutting everyone. This growing bond between them terrifies her, she doesn't know how to deal with a new found emotion and soon she does something regretful that changes the course of their life and she ends up in juvie for very long time.
“My desperate need to feel wanted had twisted into something horrific. And I had ended up hurting the one person I had wanted in my life.”
Seven years after that incident she still blames him for the way her life was changed she becomes bitterer and stops caring all together but when their paths cross again she didn't want that embedded feeling to rise which always did when Flynn’s around. How long will she go without confronting her true feeling? Will she embrace this second chance life threw at her?
I can’t tell you how much I LOVE THIS STORY. It stirred all sort of emotions in me. It made me sad, weepy, angry and mostly had me falling in love with both the MC’s. Ellie has one hell of redeeming quality, even though life ill treated her and made her ruthless, she also set her life at right direction, evolved as a better person with growing passion and emotion. What can I say about ♥Flynn♥- an epitome of love, kindness and forgiveness, most sweetest and honest person I had a pleasure of meeting. Even after suffering so much of abuse and not having anyone to rely on, he emerges as strongest person. I love him for never losing hope, for his patience, his strength and for loving unconditionally.
I know you’re sorry Ellie. You weren't very nice to me. You made me feel angry and sad and I cried a lot because of you. But now you make me smile. You laugh and I laugh and we have fun together. You want to be with me and I want to be with you. We belong together
Thank you A. Meredith Walters for writing this beautiful heart wrenching story of two socially awkward people coming together to find normalcy in their difference. Writing was explicit, it’s not easy to develop a bittersweet character like Ellie. She made me to both hate/love Ellie and to deliver emotions of that supremacy is praise worthy.
Rating clarification: I didn't give it '5 stars' initially because I thought the epilogue was too short and I’d expected an epic ending, I wanted more of Ellie and Flynn’s new beginning but now since I know there’s going to be a continuation of their story in Chasing the Tide I’m the happiest person in the world so this story gets a deserving 5 stars for making me an emotional wreck!!
You will hate me.
You will love him.
I love him.
He has changed my world.
This quote got me so intrigued I had to dive in to know more about this bully and her victim. Yes! I hated Ellie for better part of this book for tormenting Flynn when they were in high school but when I got the insight of real Ellie, I sympathized for her.
Ellie had a rough life growing up, she was abandoned by her mother at the young age of six since then she was under foster care, despite taken by different foster homes she never felt loved or wanted. She grew up being strong, violent, temperamental and emotionally deranged. With the company of her shallow irresponsible friends she became an anti-social person seeking drugs, alcohol and meaningless sex to cover her remorse.
But there was one person who saw Ellie for what she was and not for what she became. And that’s Flynn Hendrick. Flynn recently moved to Wellston and enrolled in same school as Ellie and her friends. Flynn suffers from Asperger’s, which made him a potent target for bullying. But somehow Ellie couldn't resist the kindness in him, there’s a budding friendship between the two. Ellie finds herself in situation where she can’t express her true feeling about Flynn at the same time she didn't want her friends to know this side of her.
I hated everything what Ellie and her asshole friends did to Flynn, not once not twice but every fucking time they had to pick on him, call him names, make fun of him. I swear to god I so wanted to punch Stu, Dania, Shane and Ellie, especially Ellie for making his life miserable. Even then Flynn ALWAYS forgave her! Why?! because that’s how kind hearted he is, There is no shades of gray in his life it’s just black and white.
“He sees the beauty where others don’t. He hears love when others only hear pain. He gives me the strength to become the person I've been terrified to be.”
Besides Ellie was the only friend he had, every time she bullied him he was confused and angry but later she would apologize and spend time with him and that’s enough to make him like her again. She never felt any kind of emotions for anyone, she spent most of her life shutting everyone. This growing bond between them terrifies her, she doesn't know how to deal with a new found emotion and soon she does something regretful that changes the course of their life and she ends up in juvie for very long time.
“My desperate need to feel wanted had twisted into something horrific. And I had ended up hurting the one person I had wanted in my life.”
Seven years after that incident she still blames him for the way her life was changed she becomes bitterer and stops caring all together but when their paths cross again she didn't want that embedded feeling to rise which always did when Flynn’s around. How long will she go without confronting her true feeling? Will she embrace this second chance life threw at her?
I can’t tell you how much I LOVE THIS STORY. It stirred all sort of emotions in me. It made me sad, weepy, angry and mostly had me falling in love with both the MC’s. Ellie has one hell of redeeming quality, even though life ill treated her and made her ruthless, she also set her life at right direction, evolved as a better person with growing passion and emotion. What can I say about ♥Flynn♥- an epitome of love, kindness and forgiveness, most sweetest and honest person I had a pleasure of meeting. Even after suffering so much of abuse and not having anyone to rely on, he emerges as strongest person. I love him for never losing hope, for his patience, his strength and for loving unconditionally.
I know you’re sorry Ellie. You weren't very nice to me. You made me feel angry and sad and I cried a lot because of you. But now you make me smile. You laugh and I laugh and we have fun together. You want to be with me and I want to be with you. We belong together
Thank you A. Meredith Walters for writing this beautiful heart wrenching story of two socially awkward people coming together to find normalcy in their difference. Writing was explicit, it’s not easy to develop a bittersweet character like Ellie. She made me to both hate/love Ellie and to deliver emotions of that supremacy is praise worthy.
Rating clarification: I didn't give it '5 stars' initially because I thought the epilogue was too short and I’d expected an epic ending, I wanted more of Ellie and Flynn’s new beginning but now since I know there’s going to be a continuation of their story in Chasing the Tide I’m the happiest person in the world so this story gets a deserving 5 stars for making me an emotional wreck!!
December 14, 2014
After finishing Lead Me Not (you can read my review here), I couldn't resist and not pick up one more novel by A. Meredith Walters. I am happy that I did, because what I read was equally good as her latest novel and completely different when it comes to the story.
I did not expect that. One of the biggest cliches of new adult genre is alpha male/bad boy who falls in love with the good girl. A lot of drama and angst. Reclaiming the Sand is a novel that might not appeal to the fans of genre. Why? For starters, forget about bad boys and melodramatic make out sessions. There is nothing easy here and you could find yourself in situation where you wouldn't know if you hate main character or you forgive her. Ellie is usually that girl we find somewhere on sidelines in new adult books - unlikeable character who at some point choose to do a good thing and in the end we start to believe that there might still be hope for her redemption. It was hard to "accept" her and even harder to empathize with her because a lot of things that she had done were cruel and mean. Ellie is a bully. Nothing cannot undo her past, but I kind of understood some of her actions and in the end I didn't resent her that much.
Flynn. One thing I can promise you is that you have never met main male character like this in any new adult novel you have read so far. Flynn is complete opposite to Kellan Kyle and Travis Maddox type of boys. Struggling his whole life with Asperger's, Flynn had a hard time growing up, adjusting to change and interacting with other people. Ellie didn't make things any easier for him. My heart broke every time when he would smile and say that she is his friend now because she smiles at him and talks with him. Or when he would let her hold his hand. And I was so proud when he stood up for himself. I melted when he told her this:
Please, read this! Reclaiming the Sand is a book worth reading, especially for all of you who have doubts about genre or no love for alpha males.
Review posted at Ja čitam, a ti?
I did not expect that. One of the biggest cliches of new adult genre is alpha male/bad boy who falls in love with the good girl. A lot of drama and angst. Reclaiming the Sand is a novel that might not appeal to the fans of genre. Why? For starters, forget about bad boys and melodramatic make out sessions. There is nothing easy here and you could find yourself in situation where you wouldn't know if you hate main character or you forgive her. Ellie is usually that girl we find somewhere on sidelines in new adult books - unlikeable character who at some point choose to do a good thing and in the end we start to believe that there might still be hope for her redemption. It was hard to "accept" her and even harder to empathize with her because a lot of things that she had done were cruel and mean. Ellie is a bully. Nothing cannot undo her past, but I kind of understood some of her actions and in the end I didn't resent her that much.
Flynn. One thing I can promise you is that you have never met main male character like this in any new adult novel you have read so far. Flynn is complete opposite to Kellan Kyle and Travis Maddox type of boys. Struggling his whole life with Asperger's, Flynn had a hard time growing up, adjusting to change and interacting with other people. Ellie didn't make things any easier for him. My heart broke every time when he would smile and say that she is his friend now because she smiles at him and talks with him. Or when he would let her hold his hand. And I was so proud when he stood up for himself. I melted when he told her this:
"I’m upset, Ellie! Because you won’t talk to me! Because you always hurt me! You make it so hard to love you!"
Please, read this! Reclaiming the Sand is a book worth reading, especially for all of you who have doubts about genre or no love for alpha males.
Song that fits the book --- Dustin Tebbutt "The Breach"
Review posted at Ja čitam, a ti?
February 3, 2015
Review after re-read
This is the story of Ellie and Flynn. Bully and victim. Ellie had been tormenting Flynn, when they were at high school, along with her group of friends getting pleasure from making his life miserable. Flynn has Asperger's and he couldn't understand why people were treating him that way.
There was no coming back from loving
Flynn Hendrick.
Ever.
Flynn has found his way deep into my heart and I'm not letting him get out of there. Seriously, thank you for this amazing book! Thank you for this lovely character! I cannot thank you enough for this. It touched me deep and I fell in love with Freaky Flynn. Of course I didn't like the bullying scenes , but sadly nowadays it's expected with the high rates of bullying at schools and not only. This is a sad fact, but it is however a fact.
“I remember everything about you.
Even the stuff I wish I could forget”
Six years pass and Ellie with Flynn meet again. Many things have changed during those years. But some things had remained the same.
Was it possible for two people who had hurt each
other so badly be happy together?
All you have to do is read this wonderful book and find out. Enjoy the ride through the journey between present & past, around Ellie's & Flynn's lives.I highly recomment this book, I'm sure that everyone will fall in love with this guy.
This is the story of Ellie and Flynn. Bully and victim. Ellie had been tormenting Flynn, when they were at high school, along with her group of friends getting pleasure from making his life miserable. Flynn has Asperger's and he couldn't understand why people were treating him that way.
There was no coming back from loving
Flynn Hendrick.
Ever.
Flynn has found his way deep into my heart and I'm not letting him get out of there. Seriously, thank you for this amazing book! Thank you for this lovely character! I cannot thank you enough for this. It touched me deep and I fell in love with Freaky Flynn. Of course I didn't like the bullying scenes , but sadly nowadays it's expected with the high rates of bullying at schools and not only. This is a sad fact, but it is however a fact.
“I remember everything about you.
Even the stuff I wish I could forget”
Six years pass and Ellie with Flynn meet again. Many things have changed during those years. But some things had remained the same.
Was it possible for two people who had hurt each
other so badly be happy together?
All you have to do is read this wonderful book and find out. Enjoy the ride through the journey between present & past, around Ellie's & Flynn's lives.I highly recomment this book, I'm sure that everyone will fall in love with this guy.
January 5, 2015
5++ 'Messed Up' Stars
Reclaiming in the Sand is one fucked up story.
Ellie is a bully, full of hatred, and an unhappy person.
“I am an ugly person.
I do ugly things.
I think ugly thoughts.
You will hate me.
You will detest the choices that I have made.”
“If it’s true that eyes are the windows to your soul, I knew that mine held no possibility for goodness.”
Flynn is the freak, the awkward kid, and the kid with Aspergers.
I hate being alone. I want people to talk to me. I want them to like me. It makes me angry when I try to say something and people ignore me. Or worse they laugh. They call me names. Lots of names. Mean names.
“But you will love him.
It’s hard not to.
He is everything that I’m not.
He is good. He is kind. He cares for others deeply and absolutely”
We go back and forth between Ellie's pov (present) and Flynn's pov (past). We see the major changes in Ellie. She was a raging-straight-out-bitch. She hated herself and others. She was Flynn's friend in secret but treated him like shit in front of her druggie friends.
Fate brought these two back together.
Is it easy to forgive?
Can they start over and forget the past?
Can we have a second chance, not with others but also with ourselves?
“ Flynn had forgiven me, even when I couldn’t apologize. He always did. I wasn’t sure who was the bigger idiot. Flynn for accepting an apology I could never verbalize or me for not being brave enough to say"
This book was beyond beautiful. I really can't explain how this book effected me in so many ways. It made me look at the world in different colors. It was truly amazing. Sure I didn't like Ellie at the beginning but she wormed up on me. She's really terrific in her own way. Sure she made some mistakes in the past but didn't we all? We all deserve a second chance.
“Our roles in each other’s lives had been to every extreme.
Bully and victim.
Friend.
Champion.
Lover.”
“They say misery loves company. And we were the best company each other had.
Reclaiming in the Sand is one fucked up story.
Ellie is a bully, full of hatred, and an unhappy person.
“I am an ugly person.
I do ugly things.
I think ugly thoughts.
You will hate me.
You will detest the choices that I have made.”
“If it’s true that eyes are the windows to your soul, I knew that mine held no possibility for goodness.”
Flynn is the freak, the awkward kid, and the kid with Aspergers.
I hate being alone. I want people to talk to me. I want them to like me. It makes me angry when I try to say something and people ignore me. Or worse they laugh. They call me names. Lots of names. Mean names.
“But you will love him.
It’s hard not to.
He is everything that I’m not.
He is good. He is kind. He cares for others deeply and absolutely”
We go back and forth between Ellie's pov (present) and Flynn's pov (past). We see the major changes in Ellie. She was a raging-straight-out-bitch. She hated herself and others. She was Flynn's friend in secret but treated him like shit in front of her druggie friends.
Fate brought these two back together.
Is it easy to forgive?
Can they start over and forget the past?
Can we have a second chance, not with others but also with ourselves?
“ Flynn had forgiven me, even when I couldn’t apologize. He always did. I wasn’t sure who was the bigger idiot. Flynn for accepting an apology I could never verbalize or me for not being brave enough to say"
This book was beyond beautiful. I really can't explain how this book effected me in so many ways. It made me look at the world in different colors. It was truly amazing. Sure I didn't like Ellie at the beginning but she wormed up on me. She's really terrific in her own way. Sure she made some mistakes in the past but didn't we all? We all deserve a second chance.
“Our roles in each other’s lives had been to every extreme.
Bully and victim.
Friend.
Champion.
Lover.”
“They say misery loves company. And we were the best company each other had.
March 8, 2015
5 Beautiful Stars!
Sometimes love is painful. Sometimes love is beautiful.
I’m not sure how to start this review other than to say that it was BEAUTIFUL and PAINFUL in equal measures. The beauty in the book came from Flynn Hendrick and the pain came from Ellie Mccallum. This book will bring about emotions that will have your heart hurting in ways it may have never hurt before BUT for me it also had my heart experiencing a pure sense of love that made it worth each and every tear that fell. And your tears will fall. I hope my words don’t deter you from reading Flynn and Ellie’s story. I am so happy to have met these two. Their story has affected me in a way I won’t soon forget.
I will say what made a HUGE difference for me was not going into this book blind. I needed to know a little bit about it. I skimmed a friend’s review, asked a question or two then found myself one-clicking and had the book on my Kindle. That was back in March. Then I waited for that moment when my finger unconsciously clicked it open.
Here are my thoughts about Flynn, Ellie and their friendship, their pain and their love.
Flynn~
Simply put he was beautiful. He is my superstar. He is also different than most. Flynn has Asperger’s Syndrome. For me it is his condition that made him so beautiful. He felt things differently, he loved differently. Flynn didn't always understand “why” things were the way they were or “why” people treated him the way they did. He just wanted to be liked and to belong.
“Flynn was pure. He was untainted. He was good. And this man trusted me”. ~Ellie
Ellie ~
There is so much to dislike about Ellie. She was mean. She was hurtful. She was a coward. But there were likeable parts of Ellie that she had locked away deep within herself. Even though she was flawed she had love to give. It was just something that wasn’t easy for Ellie to do. Ellie was diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder. Her illness is a result of her difficult life within foster care and having no family. She needed desperately for someone to want her in their life. Someone to need her in their life.
“You should do what makes you happy. You are smart. You are beautiful. You can do anything”. ~Flynn
Their Friendship, their pain & their love ~
Flynn and Ellie’s story was one that I won’t soon forget. Not only because of the sadness and the pain that came from it but because of the friendship and love that Flynn unknowingly nourished between them.
Flynn and Ellie meet at school and share one class together. Ellie is visually different and Flynn is drawn to her. Flynn’s directness with his words and actions startle Ellie a bit but it is also what pulls her towards him. Flynn is flawed just like Ellie, albeit differently. Flynn’s illness makes it difficult for him to fit in, for him to be like most in social situations. As he begins to interact with Ellie, in his eyes a friendship starts.
Ellie doesn’t understand (for lack of a better word) what starts to happen between her and Flynn. She should right? Friendship is something she should know about. But the relationships that Ellie has always been part of have offered her nothing but pain. The people that she currently calls her “friends” are just like her. Hate flows through their veins. But Ellie becomes a friend to Flynn. On her own terms, terms that Flynn would never be able to understand.
The little things that Ellie would say or do when they were together made Flynn happy. He just wanted to be liked, for people to talk with him, to have a friend. Ellie’s friendship gave him that but it also brought him sadness and pain. Ellie’s friends would bully and torment Flynn. The things that they did to him were despicable and horrid. What is worse though is that Ellie stood by and allowed it and sometimes joined in. Flynn may not have had the ability to understand but he felt the pain. And the hurt that Ellie caused was the worst. He hated her friends Dania, Stu and Shane but his feelings for Ellie were different, different until that final day.
Ellie and her friends make one final hateful choice that brings upon a punishment that Ellie deserves and this removes her from Flynn’s life. It’s been two years since she has seen Flynn, two years where her mind and heart has hardened where Flynn is concerned, two years where she told herself she would never see him again. Yet fate has other plans for these two. Flynn walks back into her life.
Ellie is not prepared to see Flynn again and what happens between them is something, once again, she doesn’t understand. But this time something is different with Ellie. Ellie’s life is no longer consumed with hatred. There are other things that begin to fill her life and allow her to see things a little differently. She has a job, she is doing community service at a pet shelter and she takes a big step to improve her future by attending college.
As Flynn continues to pop into Ellie’s life he offers her something simple, friendship……love. It wasn’t easy for these two to move beyond the past that they shared but they had to. Flynn cares for Ellie and wants her in his life. Ellie wants this too but knows she doesn’t deserve him. Not after all the pain she has caused him but she isn’t willing to give him up. She is only willing to fight harder to keep him in her life.
❤ I know you’re sorry Ellie. You weren’t very nice to me. You made me feel angry and sad and I cried a lot because of you. But now you make me smile. You laugh and I laugh and we have fun together. You want to be with me and I want to be with you. We belong together. ~ Flynn
You think we belong together? ~ Ellie
You make me feel good, Ellie. I make you laugh. We’re happy together. That’s all that matters. ~ Flynn❤
Will how Flynn feels be enough for both of them?
Please pick up this book and read what happens with Flynn and Ellie. Experience their journey. Find out if these two souls can be mended or if the pain from their past is too much to overcome. Can they have a relationship filled with touches, kisses and intimacy?
❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤
Reclaiming the Sand is a story that has found a special place in my heart. Flynn was precious. Ellie was someone difficult to come to love and accept. But I did I come to accept her and forgive her but I won’t forget what she did. I never came to accept or forgive her friends. Hatred is all I feel for them.
I want more though. I hope we get more of Flynn and Ellie’s story and see what fate still has in store for them.❤
Sometimes love is painful. Sometimes love is beautiful.
I’m not sure how to start this review other than to say that it was BEAUTIFUL and PAINFUL in equal measures. The beauty in the book came from Flynn Hendrick and the pain came from Ellie Mccallum. This book will bring about emotions that will have your heart hurting in ways it may have never hurt before BUT for me it also had my heart experiencing a pure sense of love that made it worth each and every tear that fell. And your tears will fall. I hope my words don’t deter you from reading Flynn and Ellie’s story. I am so happy to have met these two. Their story has affected me in a way I won’t soon forget.
I will say what made a HUGE difference for me was not going into this book blind. I needed to know a little bit about it. I skimmed a friend’s review, asked a question or two then found myself one-clicking and had the book on my Kindle. That was back in March. Then I waited for that moment when my finger unconsciously clicked it open.
Here are my thoughts about Flynn, Ellie and their friendship, their pain and their love.
Flynn~
Simply put he was beautiful. He is my superstar. He is also different than most. Flynn has Asperger’s Syndrome. For me it is his condition that made him so beautiful. He felt things differently, he loved differently. Flynn didn't always understand “why” things were the way they were or “why” people treated him the way they did. He just wanted to be liked and to belong.
“Flynn was pure. He was untainted. He was good. And this man trusted me”. ~Ellie
Ellie ~
There is so much to dislike about Ellie. She was mean. She was hurtful. She was a coward. But there were likeable parts of Ellie that she had locked away deep within herself. Even though she was flawed she had love to give. It was just something that wasn’t easy for Ellie to do. Ellie was diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder. Her illness is a result of her difficult life within foster care and having no family. She needed desperately for someone to want her in their life. Someone to need her in their life.
“You should do what makes you happy. You are smart. You are beautiful. You can do anything”. ~Flynn
Their Friendship, their pain & their love ~
Flynn and Ellie’s story was one that I won’t soon forget. Not only because of the sadness and the pain that came from it but because of the friendship and love that Flynn unknowingly nourished between them.
Flynn and Ellie meet at school and share one class together. Ellie is visually different and Flynn is drawn to her. Flynn’s directness with his words and actions startle Ellie a bit but it is also what pulls her towards him. Flynn is flawed just like Ellie, albeit differently. Flynn’s illness makes it difficult for him to fit in, for him to be like most in social situations. As he begins to interact with Ellie, in his eyes a friendship starts.
Ellie doesn’t understand (for lack of a better word) what starts to happen between her and Flynn. She should right? Friendship is something she should know about. But the relationships that Ellie has always been part of have offered her nothing but pain. The people that she currently calls her “friends” are just like her. Hate flows through their veins. But Ellie becomes a friend to Flynn. On her own terms, terms that Flynn would never be able to understand.
The little things that Ellie would say or do when they were together made Flynn happy. He just wanted to be liked, for people to talk with him, to have a friend. Ellie’s friendship gave him that but it also brought him sadness and pain. Ellie’s friends would bully and torment Flynn. The things that they did to him were despicable and horrid. What is worse though is that Ellie stood by and allowed it and sometimes joined in. Flynn may not have had the ability to understand but he felt the pain. And the hurt that Ellie caused was the worst. He hated her friends Dania, Stu and Shane but his feelings for Ellie were different, different until that final day.
Ellie and her friends make one final hateful choice that brings upon a punishment that Ellie deserves and this removes her from Flynn’s life. It’s been two years since she has seen Flynn, two years where her mind and heart has hardened where Flynn is concerned, two years where she told herself she would never see him again. Yet fate has other plans for these two. Flynn walks back into her life.
Ellie is not prepared to see Flynn again and what happens between them is something, once again, she doesn’t understand. But this time something is different with Ellie. Ellie’s life is no longer consumed with hatred. There are other things that begin to fill her life and allow her to see things a little differently. She has a job, she is doing community service at a pet shelter and she takes a big step to improve her future by attending college.
As Flynn continues to pop into Ellie’s life he offers her something simple, friendship……love. It wasn’t easy for these two to move beyond the past that they shared but they had to. Flynn cares for Ellie and wants her in his life. Ellie wants this too but knows she doesn’t deserve him. Not after all the pain she has caused him but she isn’t willing to give him up. She is only willing to fight harder to keep him in her life.
❤ I know you’re sorry Ellie. You weren’t very nice to me. You made me feel angry and sad and I cried a lot because of you. But now you make me smile. You laugh and I laugh and we have fun together. You want to be with me and I want to be with you. We belong together. ~ Flynn
You think we belong together? ~ Ellie
You make me feel good, Ellie. I make you laugh. We’re happy together. That’s all that matters. ~ Flynn❤
Will how Flynn feels be enough for both of them?
Please pick up this book and read what happens with Flynn and Ellie. Experience their journey. Find out if these two souls can be mended or if the pain from their past is too much to overcome. Can they have a relationship filled with touches, kisses and intimacy?
❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤
Reclaiming the Sand is a story that has found a special place in my heart. Flynn was precious. Ellie was someone difficult to come to love and accept. But I did I come to accept her and forgive her but I won’t forget what she did. I never came to accept or forgive her friends. Hatred is all I feel for them.
I want more though. I hope we get more of Flynn and Ellie’s story and see what fate still has in store for them.❤
June 30, 2015
reread:29/06/15
Still love it... but Ellie did disappoint me more the second time around.
First read:02/01/15
This book had me at the edge of tearing up one too many times... I just... *Sigh*
Wow...
Ok I'll be back when I can think straight.
I was really conflicted reading this book and even more so trying to write this review.
I think what makes a book amazing is when an author is able to convey an idea so flawlessly thought out making you come back for seconds despite having you disagree wholeheartedly with the actions taken and disliking most of the characters. I found the writing vivid enough to make the characters come to life right before my eyes, the situations realistic enough to make me cringe, and the heartache devastating enough to make me cry.
Ellie: the bully
This girl is down right depressing and its not that she's sad in the literal sense, its more of a helplessness of giving up hope leading to giving up on life. She is an ugly person who does ugly things and has ugly thoughts. She is selfish and cruel. Mean and tactless. She was coward and a spineless one at that. And sometimes she just sucked. She sucked without needing to, with no reason behind it, just because she could.
The weird thing is I don't hate Ellie. I do admit she makes it easy to loathe her, man, she makes it so goddamned easy, but still, I do not hate her. I'm a very firm believer that we are a product of our environment. One cannot love if one does not know love and how would you know love if you have never been loved? You cannot give what you've never received. I know there are exceptions because we do see them, like, when parents that come from a broken homes decide that they would rather rot than inflict on their children what was inflicted on them. But are we not human? And what do humans do if not just choose the easy way out? And what is the easy way out if not just do what you've been taught? And what have you been taught if not just to leave when things get hard or to just not stay long enough to wait for them to get hard in the first place?
Flynn: the victim
He is everything that Ellie is not. He is the spark of change in Ellie's life, the flicker of light in her darkness and he is the one who makes her salvageable. He chooses to love her and by doing so he teaches her how to love. Flynn is the catalyst in her redemption. He sees the beauty that she so desperately tries to hide. He sees the kindness that she withholds. He sees the tears she cannot cry, the hurt she cannot show and he just teaches her to love without limits, without condition, to love with abandon. He teaches love is everlasting and all consuming. He teaches love is not limited to a mile radius but ever reaching. I believe love is not a sentiment or an emotion for those are fickle and volatile. I believe it is a choice. We do not fall in love, we walk right into it. Love is not blind, we just choose not to see. It does not end, we just choose indifference over it.
Still love it... but Ellie did disappoint me more the second time around.
First read:02/01/15
This book had me at the edge of tearing up one too many times... I just... *Sigh*
Wow...
Ok I'll be back when I can think straight.
I was really conflicted reading this book and even more so trying to write this review.
I think what makes a book amazing is when an author is able to convey an idea so flawlessly thought out making you come back for seconds despite having you disagree wholeheartedly with the actions taken and disliking most of the characters. I found the writing vivid enough to make the characters come to life right before my eyes, the situations realistic enough to make me cringe, and the heartache devastating enough to make me cry.
Ellie: the bully
This girl is down right depressing and its not that she's sad in the literal sense, its more of a helplessness of giving up hope leading to giving up on life. She is an ugly person who does ugly things and has ugly thoughts. She is selfish and cruel. Mean and tactless. She was coward and a spineless one at that. And sometimes she just sucked. She sucked without needing to, with no reason behind it, just because she could.
The weird thing is I don't hate Ellie. I do admit she makes it easy to loathe her, man, she makes it so goddamned easy, but still, I do not hate her. I'm a very firm believer that we are a product of our environment. One cannot love if one does not know love and how would you know love if you have never been loved? You cannot give what you've never received. I know there are exceptions because we do see them, like, when parents that come from a broken homes decide that they would rather rot than inflict on their children what was inflicted on them. But are we not human? And what do humans do if not just choose the easy way out? And what is the easy way out if not just do what you've been taught? And what have you been taught if not just to leave when things get hard or to just not stay long enough to wait for them to get hard in the first place?
Flynn: the victim
He is everything that Ellie is not. He is the spark of change in Ellie's life, the flicker of light in her darkness and he is the one who makes her salvageable. He chooses to love her and by doing so he teaches her how to love. Flynn is the catalyst in her redemption. He sees the beauty that she so desperately tries to hide. He sees the kindness that she withholds. He sees the tears she cannot cry, the hurt she cannot show and he just teaches her to love without limits, without condition, to love with abandon. He teaches love is everlasting and all consuming. He teaches love is not limited to a mile radius but ever reaching. I believe love is not a sentiment or an emotion for those are fickle and volatile. I believe it is a choice. We do not fall in love, we walk right into it. Love is not blind, we just choose not to see. It does not end, we just choose indifference over it.
“Some people came into your life and they changed it completely and then they slipped out of it again before you could grab ahold of them.
And their presence motivates you and strengthens you and devastates you all at the same time.”
January 20, 2018
▒ Buddy Read with my favorite Indy girl Chelsea* ▒
*click to read her review
I love reviewing books, I really do. Yet sometimes I come across a book which I don't want to review at all. Why here? Although I did feel contradictory emotions through my read, I end feeling hollow in the end.
As you can guess, I don't like this sensation at all.
#PlotLacking aka I'm not impressed that much
The story was going nowhere. I'm sorry but it's true. That's my truth, anyway. Of course we can argue that it's a journey to forgiveness and acceptance - of course. Yet while the first half did a very good job at setting the scene and introducing these mostly awful characters, the second part lost me at some point. Perhaps I missed something, but in my opinion the story started to drag without real aim, except for waiting for the big revelation that we just KNEW would shatter everything. Don't get me wrong, I was expecting the angst, I really was, but while I thought I was okay with it I realized pretty fast that it was the kind of angst I can't stand : the "I-know-what-will-happen-and-I'm-dreading-it" kind of angst. I can't help but loathe it, because in my opinion that's the easiest kind of angst. The easiest way to make readers feel and to ensure the success of the book. Sorry but I'm not buying it, I'm just annoyed.
#IWantYouToRotInHell aka Why, hello, awful characters!
Now, I don't think I'm picky with characters and I know that I have in me to love evil characters. Hell, I adored Jorg from The Broken Empire and he's such a sick devil. So, nah, I wasn't particularly worried before starting it. But damn, I didn't expect to meet such DUMB SICK BASTARDS. I'll keep it short because I'm feeling judgmental toward them but COME. ON. There's only so many craps I can take, and when the characters make you feel the urge to SKIM whole parts of the book (I resisted), that's problematic, right?
► Dania : You evil irresponsible BITCH. I can overtake a lot of things, but not only this girl is mean, manipulative, but she fucking continues to drink and take drug while she's PREGNANT and that made me rage. Fucking RAGE because she's so STUPID and SELFISH.
► Stu & Shane : What a bunch of selfish sick and disgusting bastards. I don't even want to talk about them.
► Ellie : What can I say about our main character? Did I hate her? Oh yes I did. Yet I tried to understand her, I really tried, and I can't deny that she managed to move me several times - But damn, it seemed that each time I was starting to warm a little to her she HAD to do something stupid or mean or selfish - not to mention the flashbacks that destroyed any pretention to like her I could have. Seeing her sick behavior through Flynn's eyes made me often want to slap her and call her on a shit because what a COWARD. Seriously. Oh, excuse me, am I supposed to feel sorry for her? The truth is, I could have. Really. Because she was put into a considerable amount of shit in her life, I must admit. But despite her evolution, despite the cute moments, despite all that can be seen as beautiful in their story, in the end, I'm leaving her with a bitter aftertaste.
✘ I'm not sure what the story is supposed to teach us. That love overtakes everything? I hate this message. No, I don't think serial-killers and dictators deserve to be loved, I'm mean like that. Therefore even though Ellie is far from being a serial-killer, I JUST CAN'T ROOT FOR HER AND FLYNN. I fucking can't and I'm not sorry for it, because her bunch of friends and her aren't anything but cowards, assholes, and STUPID BULLIES.
I can love villains, but I have absolutely NO patience for stupidity, especially when it HURTS others.
▨ Why would you want to read it? Well, for Flynn of course.
► Flynn : Meet this adorable, kind and smart man, whose utter and complete love for Ellie makes him forgive her for EVERYTHING and makes me want to shake him. To be frank, what bothered me the most is the fact that I can't understand WHY Flynn wants to be Ellie's friend in the first place, let alone LOVES her. Don't get me wrong, I adored him (how couldn't I?) yet a little part of me stays mad because HE DESERVES BETTER ← See? That was me being a judgmental bitch. And I'm not even sorry for that.
#BigMissOnMe aka Maybe this book isn't for me
Finally, I can look at all the aspects of the problem, if I'm being frank, here's what I think : if I was giving the choice to read it knowing how I would feel in the end, I wouldn't read it.
▨ As for the ending?
Totally anticlimactic.
Therefore I can't decently give it a positive rating, even if I can't deny that it was well-written. This being said, I can understand why people loved it, their reviews point really well why this book is beautiful - but all this touching beauty was completely lost on me and I can't base my rating on what I am SUPPOSED to feel. Because even if there were some parts where I felt overwhelmed, most of the time it was just the opposite : underwhelming and disappointing.
✘Conclusion? This book wasn't for me. Let me just forget it now.
*click to read her review
I love reviewing books, I really do. Yet sometimes I come across a book which I don't want to review at all. Why here? Although I did feel contradictory emotions through my read, I end feeling hollow in the end.
As you can guess, I don't like this sensation at all.
#PlotLacking aka I'm not impressed that much
The story was going nowhere. I'm sorry but it's true. That's my truth, anyway. Of course we can argue that it's a journey to forgiveness and acceptance - of course. Yet while the first half did a very good job at setting the scene and introducing these mostly awful characters, the second part lost me at some point. Perhaps I missed something, but in my opinion the story started to drag without real aim, except for waiting for the big revelation that we just KNEW would shatter everything. Don't get me wrong, I was expecting the angst, I really was, but while I thought I was okay with it I realized pretty fast that it was the kind of angst I can't stand : the "I-know-what-will-happen-and-I'm-dreading-it" kind of angst. I can't help but loathe it, because in my opinion that's the easiest kind of angst. The easiest way to make readers feel and to ensure the success of the book. Sorry but I'm not buying it, I'm just annoyed.
#IWantYouToRotInHell aka Why, hello, awful characters!
Now, I don't think I'm picky with characters and I know that I have in me to love evil characters. Hell, I adored Jorg from The Broken Empire and he's such a sick devil. So, nah, I wasn't particularly worried before starting it. But damn, I didn't expect to meet such DUMB SICK BASTARDS. I'll keep it short because I'm feeling judgmental toward them but COME. ON. There's only so many craps I can take, and when the characters make you feel the urge to SKIM whole parts of the book (I resisted), that's problematic, right?
► Dania : You evil irresponsible BITCH. I can overtake a lot of things, but not only this girl is mean, manipulative, but she fucking continues to drink and take drug while she's PREGNANT and that made me rage. Fucking RAGE because she's so STUPID and SELFISH.
► Stu & Shane : What a bunch of selfish sick and disgusting bastards. I don't even want to talk about them.
► Ellie : What can I say about our main character? Did I hate her? Oh yes I did. Yet I tried to understand her, I really tried, and I can't deny that she managed to move me several times - But damn, it seemed that each time I was starting to warm a little to her she HAD to do something stupid or mean or selfish - not to mention the flashbacks that destroyed any pretention to like her I could have. Seeing her sick behavior through Flynn's eyes made me often want to slap her and call her on a shit because what a COWARD. Seriously. Oh, excuse me, am I supposed to feel sorry for her? The truth is, I could have. Really. Because she was put into a considerable amount of shit in her life, I must admit. But despite her evolution, despite the cute moments, despite all that can be seen as beautiful in their story, in the end, I'm leaving her with a bitter aftertaste.
✘ I'm not sure what the story is supposed to teach us. That love overtakes everything? I hate this message. No, I don't think serial-killers and dictators deserve to be loved, I'm mean like that. Therefore even though Ellie is far from being a serial-killer, I JUST CAN'T ROOT FOR HER AND FLYNN. I fucking can't and I'm not sorry for it, because her bunch of friends and her aren't anything but cowards, assholes, and STUPID BULLIES.
I can love villains, but I have absolutely NO patience for stupidity, especially when it HURTS others.
▨ Why would you want to read it? Well, for Flynn of course.
► Flynn : Meet this adorable, kind and smart man, whose utter and complete love for Ellie makes him forgive her for EVERYTHING and makes me want to shake him. To be frank, what bothered me the most is the fact that I can't understand WHY Flynn wants to be Ellie's friend in the first place, let alone LOVES her. Don't get me wrong, I adored him (how couldn't I?) yet a little part of me stays mad because HE DESERVES BETTER ← See? That was me being a judgmental bitch. And I'm not even sorry for that.
#BigMissOnMe aka Maybe this book isn't for me
Finally, I can look at all the aspects of the problem, if I'm being frank, here's what I think : if I was giving the choice to read it knowing how I would feel in the end, I wouldn't read it.
▨ As for the ending?
Totally anticlimactic.
Therefore I can't decently give it a positive rating, even if I can't deny that it was well-written. This being said, I can understand why people loved it, their reviews point really well why this book is beautiful - but all this touching beauty was completely lost on me and I can't base my rating on what I am SUPPOSED to feel. Because even if there were some parts where I felt overwhelmed, most of the time it was just the opposite : underwhelming and disappointing.
✘Conclusion? This book wasn't for me. Let me just forget it now.
March 18, 2015
Buddy read with my ferocious little Anna and my Barrons-like friend, Jenny :P
So.....I don't have a ton to say about this book, other than I was severely disappointed. I've recently fallen in love with a book that has the whole 'Mean Girls' and bullying thing going on, so I really wanted to find another book like that-bullying wise. I've also recently started to realize I am in LOVE with flawed characters....especially of the male variety. So, naturally, I figured this book would be a slam dunk-and all my friends mostly seemed to love it.
Well, I'm only posting this review so I can clearly voice my displeasure: This book was moronic. From the cheesy dialogue to the overly mean friends who can only be described as villains in a sad B-list movie(am I saying that correctly?? I mean A HORRIBLE WANNABE BLOCKBUSTER MOVIE), this book had very little going for it. In fact, the one thing it had in its favor? I can't even remember his name-this book is THAT forgettable. I loved the guy from the very beginning-he was sweet, kind, and he broke my heart. But that's literally the only reason I finished.
As for the plot?? Also moronic. Why advertise a book like it's present day when all the bad shit happens years ago??? I didn't sign up for flashbacks, thank you very much. It was weird and it halted the story horribly and when it did become all present day, it was boring boring boring. I just wanted it to be over. Like.....I FORCED myself to finish this-but I should have called it a day from the first cheesy moment-it all went downhill from there.
So...Not much to say, really, that I haven't already said. I have no clue why so many of my friends gave this such a high rating. Call me a bitch, but I didn't feel even an ounce of the angst or see a smidgen of the beauty that was talked about. It was very sad, sure, but these were deplorable characters who did deplorable things....what else is there to the story aside from, errrr, Flynn? Is that it? He was the only character I cared about. So, ya know, everyone seemed to love this and none of my friends rated low...but me, Anna, and Jen certainly had no qualms about posting big, fat 2s on the record. Hopefully you'll find something to love about this book. I just found personal torture.
For more of my reviews, please visit:
********************************
Yeaaaaah this book wasn't very good....not at all what I had expected and as it got later in the story, the dialogue became so cheesy (not Flynn, never Flynn) it was a struggle to finish. Man am I on a roll.
2 stars for Flynn.
Review to come
*****
So.....I don't have a ton to say about this book, other than I was severely disappointed. I've recently fallen in love with a book that has the whole 'Mean Girls' and bullying thing going on, so I really wanted to find another book like that-bullying wise. I've also recently started to realize I am in LOVE with flawed characters....especially of the male variety. So, naturally, I figured this book would be a slam dunk-and all my friends mostly seemed to love it.
Well, I'm only posting this review so I can clearly voice my displeasure: This book was moronic. From the cheesy dialogue to the overly mean friends who can only be described as villains in a sad B-list movie(am I saying that correctly?? I mean A HORRIBLE WANNABE BLOCKBUSTER MOVIE), this book had very little going for it. In fact, the one thing it had in its favor? I can't even remember his name-this book is THAT forgettable. I loved the guy from the very beginning-he was sweet, kind, and he broke my heart. But that's literally the only reason I finished.
As for the plot?? Also moronic. Why advertise a book like it's present day when all the bad shit happens years ago??? I didn't sign up for flashbacks, thank you very much. It was weird and it halted the story horribly and when it did become all present day, it was boring boring boring. I just wanted it to be over. Like.....I FORCED myself to finish this-but I should have called it a day from the first cheesy moment-it all went downhill from there.
So...Not much to say, really, that I haven't already said. I have no clue why so many of my friends gave this such a high rating. Call me a bitch, but I didn't feel even an ounce of the angst or see a smidgen of the beauty that was talked about. It was very sad, sure, but these were deplorable characters who did deplorable things....what else is there to the story aside from, errrr, Flynn? Is that it? He was the only character I cared about. So, ya know, everyone seemed to love this and none of my friends rated low...but me, Anna, and Jen certainly had no qualms about posting big, fat 2s on the record. Hopefully you'll find something to love about this book. I just found personal torture.
For more of my reviews, please visit:
********************************
Yeaaaaah this book wasn't very good....not at all what I had expected and as it got later in the story, the dialogue became so cheesy (not Flynn, never Flynn) it was a struggle to finish. Man am I on a roll.
2 stars for Flynn.
Review to come
*****
December 13, 2014
5 Heart-breaking Stars
Wow! This was truly amazing. A really tough read but a beautiful story nonetheless.
Sometimes it was hard for me to continue, the bullying scenes were too much at times but I'm glad that I didn't.
This book was brutally hohest and eye-opening, it touched subjects that most people avoid to acknowledge even though they're big issues in todays society.
This book needs to be read.
This story needs to be heard.
Bully and Victim.
This is their story.
Flyn has Aspergers syndrome and because of that people in school bully him. Especially Ellie and her group of friends. But Ellie, when she's alone with him, she treats him like a friend, she says she is his friend. Flynn believes her..
After a life changing event, we see them 6 years after as they meet again and try to understand and heal the old wounds.
God! Flynn is just a beautiful person. He has such a pure soul, so trusting, so forgiving even with the people who hurt him, who tormented him.
Flynn pulled out so many emotions out of me. I wanted to go to him and be his friend. He is one of the most loveable characters I've ever read.
"I hate being alone. I want people to talk to me.
I want them to like me. It makes me angry
when I try to say something and people ignore me.
Or worse they laugh.
They call me names. Lots of names. Mean names."
And my heart broke for him all over again. Flynn didn't understand all the torment. Why people treated him like that and called him names.
To everyone else he was weird, a freak like they called him but to him he was normal, this reallity was the only one he could see.
"What's wrong with you?" she asks me
and my stomach twists up.
Everyone always asks me that.
I don't understand why they ask me that."
Walters did an amazing job showing how someone with aspergers syndrome saw the world. His blunt honesty, so innocent, his shy smiles made me love him even more. And I'm glad we got to see the world through his eyes.
Ellie just stole my heart. As mush as I was hurting for Flynn, I was hurting so much more for her. Ellie had a terrible childhood. She had no guidence, being shipped of from one foster home to another she needed to toughen up to survive. She used alcohol, drugs and her body to numb the pain. To make her feel wanted and cared for.
"I hated the joy his pain gave me.
But it was a power I couldn't have anywhere else."
She didn't know how to deal with all the crap in her life and she needed somewhere to lash out, she needed to make someone to feel as small as she felt, to make him vulnerable so she can be stronger.
Don't get me wrong, I don't condone what Ellie did, it was horrible but I somewhat understand it.
Flynn and Ellie both wanted to feel loved and cared for but neither of them knew how to express it.
This was an excruciating but beautiful read. It's a story that stays with you forever.
I would highly reccomend this book to anyone.
Shelved as 'didn-t-finish'
November 22, 2015DNF 38%
There are books that I pause because I realize I am not in the mood for that type of book, but I still want to finish them. On the other side there are books that make me ponder should I give up or push myself, or pause and put it aside for couple of days.
When it comes to this book, I simply chose NOT TO FINISH it.
The problem is not in the story. I was really excited to start it the second it was live. Flynn, with Asperger's syndrome, would be the only reason for me to make myself finish it, if I chose to literally torture myself, asthe main heroine likes to torture everybody around her, to read about the main heroine, Ellie.
But, as it happens, today I am not in torture mode.
Let me tell you how I feel about Ellie.
I think she is simply disgusting. One of the most horrible heroines I had a chance to read about. She is the most self absorbed, , selfish, shitty bitch/bully that simply does not deserve anything good in the rest of the book. I don't care if she gets soft again, or redeems herself somehow for what she did (it is hunched till the part I read), or finds peace and happiness with him again...
I DON'T CARE!
I can not read anymore about how she gets drunk, and how vomits are all around her, and how her pregnant BFF, that is a psycho even she is afraid of, gets smashed with alcohol and drugs. Or how she blames Flynn for the fact that she was in juvie (I presume because she was guilty for what she caused to him because he probably hurted her.... didn't get to the part why she did what she did), even though she knew that he has Asperger's. Or how they tormented him in high school, and how she became his friend and still rooted for torment and humiliation because she what !?! was afarid of what ?!? Constantly angry of her life, what cards destiny handled her, then acceptance that there is nothing more for her in life, then choosing classes because there could be hope... Angry at all other people. Having friends but actually not really loving them. .. honestly, the whole "gang" is disgusting.
I actually had a dilemma, and was pondering for a bloody hour should I continue because of Flynn, and to see how will they happen, should I continue and see how she would become a better person... I probably would... But by the time I got to the part where I stopped, I had no desire, because she became so unlikeable person that I really had no will or wish to see the "real gentle side" of her. She was written to make you feel disgusted but completely OVER THE EFFIN TOP! Nothing could make me like her after the % I read.
She does warn you will not like her, but the reason I do not like her is not the bullying part so much... it's the filthy way of life... gaaaah...
Seriously..... I just give up because I literally DO NOT LIKE Ellie, and I can not read another page of her, whether she is mean, or found her halo and became a saint.
There are books that I pause because I realize I am not in the mood for that type of book, but I still want to finish them. On the other side there are books that make me ponder should I give up or push myself, or pause and put it aside for couple of days.
When it comes to this book, I simply chose NOT TO FINISH it.
The problem is not in the story. I was really excited to start it the second it was live. Flynn, with Asperger's syndrome, would be the only reason for me to make myself finish it, if I chose to literally torture myself, asthe main heroine likes to torture everybody around her, to read about the main heroine, Ellie.
But, as it happens, today I am not in torture mode.
Let me tell you how I feel about Ellie.
I think she is simply disgusting. One of the most horrible heroines I had a chance to read about. She is the most self absorbed, , selfish, shitty bitch/bully that simply does not deserve anything good in the rest of the book. I don't care if she gets soft again, or redeems herself somehow for what she did (it is hunched till the part I read), or finds peace and happiness with him again...
I DON'T CARE!
I can not read anymore about how she gets drunk, and how vomits are all around her, and how her pregnant BFF, that is a psycho even she is afraid of, gets smashed with alcohol and drugs. Or how she blames Flynn for the fact that she was in juvie (I presume because she was guilty for what she caused to him because he probably hurted her.... didn't get to the part why she did what she did), even though she knew that he has Asperger's. Or how they tormented him in high school, and how she became his friend and still rooted for torment and humiliation because she what !?! was afarid of what ?!? Constantly angry of her life, what cards destiny handled her, then acceptance that there is nothing more for her in life, then choosing classes because there could be hope... Angry at all other people. Having friends but actually not really loving them. .. honestly, the whole "gang" is disgusting.
I actually had a dilemma, and was pondering for a bloody hour should I continue because of Flynn, and to see how will they happen, should I continue and see how she would become a better person... I probably would... But by the time I got to the part where I stopped, I had no desire, because she became so unlikeable person that I really had no will or wish to see the "real gentle side" of her. She was written to make you feel disgusted but completely OVER THE EFFIN TOP! Nothing could make me like her after the % I read.
She does warn you will not like her, but the reason I do not like her is not the bullying part so much... it's the filthy way of life... gaaaah...
Seriously..... I just give up because I literally DO NOT LIKE Ellie, and I can not read another page of her, whether she is mean, or found her halo and became a saint.
March 20, 2014
A.Meredith Walters always gets me with her brilliant writing! It feels like I was in the story. You feel it in your bones what they are going thru'.... THAT'S SIMLY CALLED --- AWESOME FAB TALENTED WRITING!
Reclaiming the Sand made me happy, sad and angry! Flynn Hendrick was a boy that will you fall in love immediately. He captivates us. He is very strong boy.
He is the boy who gets angry and cries when Ellie and her gang bully and torment. These bunch of people are so mean. Like they don't have feelings at all.
And Ellie McCallum, is the girl who likes to bully. She doesn't care about anything and is rude. But something inside her makes her wanna get close to Flynn. The deal with her is she doesn't show that in front of her mates.
Things happen and Flynn goes away. One day, he returns back and will they connect again?
Ellie is trying to get back her life again.
" I saw you outside my studio. You were watching me"
"So?"
"You used to do that a lot. Watch me draw. I liked it"
"Don't do this with anyone else. Ever"
"What do you mean?"
"I want you to only do that with me. Okay?"
Flynn,
On the other hand, Dania, dear Lord, that woman is challenge!
I really loved this book, hope you will too!
Happy Reading
D xoxo
**ARC provided for review**
April 21, 2014
This is a tough book to read...no doubt about it. Both the H/h have some heartbreaking issues to deal with and most of the time, they are pretty over the top. But...it's those few sweet and loving moments that makes this book worth it.
Ellie's mother abandoned her when she was six years old. From that moment on, she was passed from foster home to foster home...never forming any attachments. She never let anyone get close, that was, until she met Flynn.
Flynn has Asperger's syndrome and while he can function pretty well, he also has moments where he just loses it! He seems to know what he wants and when he meets Ellie, well, he wants her.
The story is told in the present and in the past and we do get both POVs, just not enough of Flynn's. We do get to know how terribly Ellie and her friends treated Flynn, basically bullying him every chance they got. You know that Ellie is torn but she joins in anyway because she's afraid of losing her "friends". She can't stay away from Flynn and even though it finally gets through to Flynn about how Ellie is treating him, he still wants her around.
In the present, six years have passed and Ellie's life has been the same ol, same ol and she's sick of it. She sees a flyer to the local college and it pulls at something inside her. She finally gets up the nerve to take a class and she also sees Flynn again. The first time doesn't go very well but she starts seeing him all over, even when she finally goes to college.
I loved the sweetness between Flynn and Ellie. It was great to read about how it affected Ellie to finally feel something when she was with someone. And it was wonderful seeing Flynn get up the nerve to touch/kiss Ellie even as awkward as it was.
And as much as I loved the sweetness, the other parts were pretty hard to read. Ellie gets drunk/high with her friends all the time, there's a lot of vomiting and hangovers and crazy meaningless sex. The guy friends are jerks and her best friend, Dania, is pregnant but she still gets wasted all the time.
Flynn's outbursts were also difficult to read. After six years, he does have a better handle on things but watch out when he gets upset! I think Ellie did a good job being there for him and trying to help.
I thought Murphy was a wonderful addition to the story and I loved who adopted him. And the miniature sculptures added a nice touch.
The ending was both wonderful and heart wrenching. I'm glad about what Flynn told Ellie she had to do but that was also so hard. I enjoyed the Epilogue...it just needed more. I wanted to read about how things went from there. Great news!! I found out there will be another book, Chasing the Tide! I am thrilled!
Favorite quotes:
♥ “You should do what makes you happy. You are smart. You are beautiful. You can do anything. You don’t belong here. You belong out there,” he said. I was struck speechless.
♥ "But when he did touch me, my heart would with swell with the force of my feelings for him. To him I was precious and wanted. I had never, in all my life, been adored the way he adored me."
♥ “You make me feel good, Ellie. I make you laugh. We’re happy together. That’s all that matters.”
Ellie's mother abandoned her when she was six years old. From that moment on, she was passed from foster home to foster home...never forming any attachments. She never let anyone get close, that was, until she met Flynn.
Flynn has Asperger's syndrome and while he can function pretty well, he also has moments where he just loses it! He seems to know what he wants and when he meets Ellie, well, he wants her.
The story is told in the present and in the past and we do get both POVs, just not enough of Flynn's. We do get to know how terribly Ellie and her friends treated Flynn, basically bullying him every chance they got. You know that Ellie is torn but she joins in anyway because she's afraid of losing her "friends". She can't stay away from Flynn and even though it finally gets through to Flynn about how Ellie is treating him, he still wants her around.
In the present, six years have passed and Ellie's life has been the same ol, same ol and she's sick of it. She sees a flyer to the local college and it pulls at something inside her. She finally gets up the nerve to take a class and she also sees Flynn again. The first time doesn't go very well but she starts seeing him all over, even when she finally goes to college.
I loved the sweetness between Flynn and Ellie. It was great to read about how it affected Ellie to finally feel something when she was with someone. And it was wonderful seeing Flynn get up the nerve to touch/kiss Ellie even as awkward as it was.
And as much as I loved the sweetness, the other parts were pretty hard to read. Ellie gets drunk/high with her friends all the time, there's a lot of vomiting and hangovers and crazy meaningless sex. The guy friends are jerks and her best friend, Dania, is pregnant but she still gets wasted all the time.
Flynn's outbursts were also difficult to read. After six years, he does have a better handle on things but watch out when he gets upset! I think Ellie did a good job being there for him and trying to help.
I thought Murphy was a wonderful addition to the story and I loved who adopted him. And the miniature sculptures added a nice touch.
The ending was both wonderful and heart wrenching. I'm glad about what Flynn told Ellie she had to do but that was also so hard. I enjoyed the Epilogue...it just needed more. I wanted to read about how things went from there. Great news!! I found out there will be another book, Chasing the Tide! I am thrilled!
Favorite quotes:
♥ “You should do what makes you happy. You are smart. You are beautiful. You can do anything. You don’t belong here. You belong out there,” he said. I was struck speechless.
♥ "But when he did touch me, my heart would with swell with the force of my feelings for him. To him I was precious and wanted. I had never, in all my life, been adored the way he adored me."
♥ “You make me feel good, Ellie. I make you laugh. We’re happy together. That’s all that matters.”
March 26, 2014
*****5 Stars*****
~Pure,simple and completely complicated Love.~
I've been daydreaming about Flynn Hendrick ever since I finished reading this magnificent story, I needed a few days to gather my thoughts and try to compose this review; I was deeply touched by this story and it will be, without a doubt, in my top ten favorites for this year.
Ellie is a girl who has absolutely nothing; no money , no morals and no family. All she has is a group of heartless friends that only care about drinking, sex, and bullying innocent people. Ellie used to have a real friend is high school, he was honest, beautiful and kind, but he was also very different. He made her care, made her feel something especial for the first in her life and this scared her, so she did they only thing she knew how to do, hurt and destroy. It's been two years since Ellie ruined the only person who ever showed her love, and now he's back, and she's not sure this time she can survive him.
Flynn Hendrick is handsome, artistic, smart and he also has Asperger's syndrome, but if you ask me his illness was the most beautiful thing about him. Instead of being a prisoner of his condition, it made Flynn stronger, made him love harder and find beauty in the ugliest places. Ellie was his friend, his muse, but also the one person in the world who would hurt him the most.
This was not an easy book to read, I was overwhelmed by emotions of love and hate, I couldn't understand which emotion was more intense. In the end, the beauty and honesty of the story made feel an incredible empathy for this complex characters and I was once again blown away by Meredith Walters talent and ability to create such transcendent stories . Flynn simply stole my heart and I will never, ever forget him... Brilliant Book!!!
My Reclaiming The Sand Playlist:
*Hurt by Trent Reznor
*Hometown Glory by Adele
*I don't Believe You by P!nk
*Ordinary People by John Legend
~Pure,simple and completely complicated Love.~
I've been daydreaming about Flynn Hendrick ever since I finished reading this magnificent story, I needed a few days to gather my thoughts and try to compose this review; I was deeply touched by this story and it will be, without a doubt, in my top ten favorites for this year.
Ellie is a girl who has absolutely nothing; no money , no morals and no family. All she has is a group of heartless friends that only care about drinking, sex, and bullying innocent people. Ellie used to have a real friend is high school, he was honest, beautiful and kind, but he was also very different. He made her care, made her feel something especial for the first in her life and this scared her, so she did they only thing she knew how to do, hurt and destroy. It's been two years since Ellie ruined the only person who ever showed her love, and now he's back, and she's not sure this time she can survive him.
Flynn Hendrick is handsome, artistic, smart and he also has Asperger's syndrome, but if you ask me his illness was the most beautiful thing about him. Instead of being a prisoner of his condition, it made Flynn stronger, made him love harder and find beauty in the ugliest places. Ellie was his friend, his muse, but also the one person in the world who would hurt him the most.
This was not an easy book to read, I was overwhelmed by emotions of love and hate, I couldn't understand which emotion was more intense. In the end, the beauty and honesty of the story made feel an incredible empathy for this complex characters and I was once again blown away by Meredith Walters talent and ability to create such transcendent stories . Flynn simply stole my heart and I will never, ever forget him... Brilliant Book!!!
My Reclaiming The Sand Playlist:
*Hurt by Trent Reznor
*Hometown Glory by Adele
*I don't Believe You by P!nk
*Ordinary People by John Legend
November 27, 2014
3.5-4.0 Redeeming Stars!
This is a wonderfully written tale about a harsh subject with two characters so innately flawed, yet so perfect for one another.
“You will hate me.
You will detest the choices that I have made.
You won’t understand me at all.”
No truer words have been written about my feelings towards one Ellie McCalllum. This was a girl raised in a foster system of neglect. She was never truly loved and she fell into the crowd of indifference. The problem however lies in the fact that she is so much better than that!
When Flynn Hendrick and his disconnected self moved to small town Wellsburg WV he was an immediate target for the indifferent crowd. He was the target of every bully's aim even the hot and cold Ellie McCallum. His fascination with her "differences" created a strained bond and ultimately a friendship...but when pressure to make others happy becomes too much she ruins Flynn.
Time passed, life lived harshly, Ellie finds herself wanting out of the sorrows of her nowhere life. She is stunned to find her escape in the return of Freaky Flynn to her dead hometown. Again the need to connect is dominant and this time, maybe she can finally be true to herself and not the pressures of others...because when she is with Flynn her life matters...
“I loved him. I did.
I had never loved anyone before but now I loved with my whole being.
It split me open.
My guts spilled out on the floor at Flynn’s feet.
He owned me. Completely.
There was no coming back from this.
Flynn had reclaimed me.”
The writing is done beautifully, the characters flawed but hard to resist, the romance pure and naïve, and the overall story, somewhat profound! Did I love Ellie McCallum? NO...not even a little. What I loved was that a boy, different from everyone else, unable to really process the daily do and donts of life, got the true human emotion of forgiveness and redemption...He was a true survivor in the face of the worst crimes and he was the ultimate judge and jury that gave life to a girl who never really lived!
This is a wonderfully written tale about a harsh subject with two characters so innately flawed, yet so perfect for one another.
“You will hate me.
You will detest the choices that I have made.
You won’t understand me at all.”
No truer words have been written about my feelings towards one Ellie McCalllum. This was a girl raised in a foster system of neglect. She was never truly loved and she fell into the crowd of indifference. The problem however lies in the fact that she is so much better than that!
When Flynn Hendrick and his disconnected self moved to small town Wellsburg WV he was an immediate target for the indifferent crowd. He was the target of every bully's aim even the hot and cold Ellie McCallum. His fascination with her "differences" created a strained bond and ultimately a friendship...but when pressure to make others happy becomes too much she ruins Flynn.
Time passed, life lived harshly, Ellie finds herself wanting out of the sorrows of her nowhere life. She is stunned to find her escape in the return of Freaky Flynn to her dead hometown. Again the need to connect is dominant and this time, maybe she can finally be true to herself and not the pressures of others...because when she is with Flynn her life matters...
“I loved him. I did.
I had never loved anyone before but now I loved with my whole being.
It split me open.
My guts spilled out on the floor at Flynn’s feet.
He owned me. Completely.
There was no coming back from this.
Flynn had reclaimed me.”
The writing is done beautifully, the characters flawed but hard to resist, the romance pure and naïve, and the overall story, somewhat profound! Did I love Ellie McCallum? NO...not even a little. What I loved was that a boy, different from everyone else, unable to really process the daily do and donts of life, got the true human emotion of forgiveness and redemption...He was a true survivor in the face of the worst crimes and he was the ultimate judge and jury that gave life to a girl who never really lived!
March 30, 2014
★★★★★ 5 stars!
This book was amazing. Simply AMAZING.
Review to come when I've gathered my thoughts.
March 26, 2014
(4 I LOVE FLYNN STARS!)
(BR with Patty & Denisse)
Ellie McCallum is a girl who has lived a very hard life. She grew up in foster homes, and never knew what it felt like to be truly loved. Nobody ever gave a damn about her, and this shaped her into an angry, violent, bitter person. Her life had sucked all the good out of her, and she locked up all her emotions to just try to survive. She didn't cry, or dream, and accepted her life was just a series of temporary situations. No one cared, and she was simply tossed aside, and forgotten.
Around fifteen Ellie starts high school, and becomes friends with the town losers. They party, and enjoy picking on a boy with Asperger's Syndrome, named Flynn Hendrick. They bully the guy, and refer to him as "Freaky Flynn."
Poor Flynn Hendrick just wants to have friends. He has trouble communicating, and has poor people skills. He is naïve, and can't read situations properly. His high school life is horrible. The kids at Wellsburg HS make it their mission to hurt and humiliate Flynn on a daily basis. No matter how much they try and bring him down, he is pure goodness! Even though Ellie wants to dislike Flynn, she finds herself fixated on him, and they form a friendship. Flynn is very kind and forgiving.
Ellie eventually gets into some trouble, and finds herself in juvie. She gets her GED, and Flynn graduates, and goes off to college. When Ellie gets out of juvie, all she wants to do is live life. She is still a bit wild with her friends. She is now an adult with a huge chip on her shoulder, and has a reputation for being tough, and people know not to mess with her. She is still self destructive, and unable to connect to anyone or anything.
Ellie still considers herself a horrible person, and has no self respect or pride. Her life sucked all the good out of her until there was nothing left but a cold, hard, bitch without a conscience. She works at a quick stop, and one day spots Flynn in her store. She hasn't seen him in six years, and all these emotions start flooding back. She doesn't like how she feels when he is near. He is the only person to ever make her feel, and it scares her. This is why years ago, she ran, and tried to destroy any connection they had.
Ellie continues to run into Flynn, and they end up spending time together, and things grow from there. I was so conflicted, and angry while reading this book. Most of the first half of the book I just wanted to knock some sense into her!!!
There never really came a point in the book where I sympathized with her or liked her much. Now Flynn, I absolutely ADORED Flynn! He was such a beautiful person, and made the book! Just perfection! Even though I didn't like Ellie, it didn't take away from the fabulous writing! I really loved this book & thought it was fantastic!!! :))
-He was the only person who had accepted me for who I was and liked me anyway. He didn't expect me to be anything but Ellie McCallum. And I had been such a messed up kid that his simple, unconditional affection became the balm for my tormented heart.
-"I like making you smile. It makes me smile," he said, his lips stretching into a beautiful grin.
-Sure he was different, but that didn't change the fact that Flynn was beautiful.
-Kissing Flynn was a unique experience and no two kisses were ever the same.
-It makes my heart beat fast when I touch you. I've only ever felt that way with you, Ellie."
-He lifted his head and swept his dark hair out of his face. His eyes flitted around the room until he saw me. And he grinned. His heart in his eyes. He was more than amazing. He was everything.
-I had found my way home.
(BR with Patty & Denisse)
Ellie McCallum is a girl who has lived a very hard life. She grew up in foster homes, and never knew what it felt like to be truly loved. Nobody ever gave a damn about her, and this shaped her into an angry, violent, bitter person. Her life had sucked all the good out of her, and she locked up all her emotions to just try to survive. She didn't cry, or dream, and accepted her life was just a series of temporary situations. No one cared, and she was simply tossed aside, and forgotten.
Around fifteen Ellie starts high school, and becomes friends with the town losers. They party, and enjoy picking on a boy with Asperger's Syndrome, named Flynn Hendrick. They bully the guy, and refer to him as "Freaky Flynn."
Poor Flynn Hendrick just wants to have friends. He has trouble communicating, and has poor people skills. He is naïve, and can't read situations properly. His high school life is horrible. The kids at Wellsburg HS make it their mission to hurt and humiliate Flynn on a daily basis. No matter how much they try and bring him down, he is pure goodness! Even though Ellie wants to dislike Flynn, she finds herself fixated on him, and they form a friendship. Flynn is very kind and forgiving.
Ellie eventually gets into some trouble, and finds herself in juvie. She gets her GED, and Flynn graduates, and goes off to college. When Ellie gets out of juvie, all she wants to do is live life. She is still a bit wild with her friends. She is now an adult with a huge chip on her shoulder, and has a reputation for being tough, and people know not to mess with her. She is still self destructive, and unable to connect to anyone or anything.
Ellie still considers herself a horrible person, and has no self respect or pride. Her life sucked all the good out of her until there was nothing left but a cold, hard, bitch without a conscience. She works at a quick stop, and one day spots Flynn in her store. She hasn't seen him in six years, and all these emotions start flooding back. She doesn't like how she feels when he is near. He is the only person to ever make her feel, and it scares her. This is why years ago, she ran, and tried to destroy any connection they had.
Ellie continues to run into Flynn, and they end up spending time together, and things grow from there. I was so conflicted, and angry while reading this book. Most of the first half of the book I just wanted to knock some sense into her!!!
There never really came a point in the book where I sympathized with her or liked her much. Now Flynn, I absolutely ADORED Flynn! He was such a beautiful person, and made the book! Just perfection! Even though I didn't like Ellie, it didn't take away from the fabulous writing! I really loved this book & thought it was fantastic!!! :))
-He was the only person who had accepted me for who I was and liked me anyway. He didn't expect me to be anything but Ellie McCallum. And I had been such a messed up kid that his simple, unconditional affection became the balm for my tormented heart.
-"I like making you smile. It makes me smile," he said, his lips stretching into a beautiful grin.
-Sure he was different, but that didn't change the fact that Flynn was beautiful.
-Kissing Flynn was a unique experience and no two kisses were ever the same.
-It makes my heart beat fast when I touch you. I've only ever felt that way with you, Ellie."
-He lifted his head and swept his dark hair out of his face. His eyes flitted around the room until he saw me. And he grinned. His heart in his eyes. He was more than amazing. He was everything.
-I had found my way home.
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