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Mr. Suicide
Like everyone else in the world, you’ve wanted to do things people say you shouldn’t do.
How many times in your life have you wanted to slap someone? Really, literally strike them? You can’t even begin to count the times. Hundreds. Thousands. You’re not exaggerating. You’re not engaging in… whatchamacallit? Hyperbole? You’re not engaging in hyperbole.
Maybe the impulse flashed through your brain for only a moment, like lightning, when someone tried to skip ahead of you in line at the cafeteria. Hell, at more than one point in your life you’ve wanted to kill someone; really, literally kill someone. That’s not just an expression. Not hyperbole. Then it was gone and replaced by the civilized thought: You can’t do that. Not out in public.
But you’ve had the thought…
From Shirley Jackson Award-nominated author Nicole Cushing comes Mr. Suicide, a novel of the Great Dark Mouth.
How many times in your life have you wanted to slap someone? Really, literally strike them? You can’t even begin to count the times. Hundreds. Thousands. You’re not exaggerating. You’re not engaging in… whatchamacallit? Hyperbole? You’re not engaging in hyperbole.
Maybe the impulse flashed through your brain for only a moment, like lightning, when someone tried to skip ahead of you in line at the cafeteria. Hell, at more than one point in your life you’ve wanted to kill someone; really, literally kill someone. That’s not just an expression. Not hyperbole. Then it was gone and replaced by the civilized thought: You can’t do that. Not out in public.
But you’ve had the thought…
From Shirley Jackson Award-nominated author Nicole Cushing comes Mr. Suicide, a novel of the Great Dark Mouth.
224 pages, Paperback
First published July 15, 2015
About the author
Nicole Cushing
41 books338 followersNicole Cushing is the Bram Stoker Award® winning author of Mr. Suicide and a two-time nominee for the Shirley Jackson Award.
Various reviewers have described her work as “brutal”, “cerebral”, “transgressive”, "wickedly funny", “taboo”, “groundbreaking” and “mind-bending”.
Rue Morgue magazine included Nicole in its list of 13 Wicked Women to Watch, praising her as an “an intense and uncompromising literary voice”. She has also garnered praise from Jack Ketchum, Thomas Ligotti, and Poppy Z. Brite (aka, Billy Martin).
Her second novel, A Sick Gray Laugh (2019) was named to LitReactor’s Best Horror Novels of the Last Decade list and the Locus Recommended Reading List. She has recently completed and polished her third novel.
She lives in Indiana.
Various reviewers have described her work as “brutal”, “cerebral”, “transgressive”, "wickedly funny", “taboo”, “groundbreaking” and “mind-bending”.
Rue Morgue magazine included Nicole in its list of 13 Wicked Women to Watch, praising her as an “an intense and uncompromising literary voice”. She has also garnered praise from Jack Ketchum, Thomas Ligotti, and Poppy Z. Brite (aka, Billy Martin).
Her second novel, A Sick Gray Laugh (2019) was named to LitReactor’s Best Horror Novels of the Last Decade list and the Locus Recommended Reading List. She has recently completed and polished her third novel.
She lives in Indiana.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 60 reviews
February 14, 2016
Read this book after it made the Horror Writer's Association long list for a Bram Stoker Award
Damn.
This book was stunning. Started off with a deep empathy for depression, and lead into a journey into decadent debauchery, a bastardized life, where all existence is suffering (my words, not the authors...) and questions of which urge to succumb to. To be or not to be, or to have never been at all. If you've ever heard Rust Cohle (True Detective) go off on the human species being a mistake and consciousness a terrible affliction (all the while, he was paraphrasing Ligotti) then you may just get off on this wild, powerful book, which towards the ends turns more treatise than plot and made you want to know what else the author has written. Loss of innocence takes more than Holden Caulfield seeing the F word.
The world needs more second person point of view stories, and this one is mind-blowing. And maybe even birth control.
Damn.
This book was stunning. Started off with a deep empathy for depression, and lead into a journey into decadent debauchery, a bastardized life, where all existence is suffering (my words, not the authors...) and questions of which urge to succumb to. To be or not to be, or to have never been at all. If you've ever heard Rust Cohle (True Detective) go off on the human species being a mistake and consciousness a terrible affliction (all the while, he was paraphrasing Ligotti) then you may just get off on this wild, powerful book, which towards the ends turns more treatise than plot and made you want to know what else the author has written. Loss of innocence takes more than Holden Caulfield seeing the F word.
The world needs more second person point of view stories, and this one is mind-blowing. And maybe even birth control.
November 27, 2017
If you ask me, good art makes you think, REAL art makes you feel, and a good artist will make you feel things you've never felt before. This is the second book I've read by Nicole Cushing and she has made me feel things I've never felt before. What started out as pity turned into this weird amalgam of fear and revulsion and anxiety juxtaposed with a perverse curiosity. Another great story with another hugely satisfying conclusion I highly recommend this.
September 1, 2015
Review copy
Nicole Cushing is a Shirley Jackson Award finalist who's written a number of stand-alone novellas and dozens of short stories. Nicole has been referred to as the literary equivalent of the love child between Jack Ketchum and Poppy Z. Bright. Raised in rural Maryland and now living in southern Indiana, Nicole counts master storyteller Edgar Allen Poe as having had a big influence on her as a writer.
In recent weeks, I'd noticed a bit of a buzz about her debut novel and knew I had to check it out. I'm so glad I did. When I opened the book I right away noticed some very positive blurbs from authors I respect a great deal, including Ray Garton and the aforementioned Jack Ketchum.
After finishing Mr. Suicide, it's difficult to believe this is her first published novel. The kind words from so many of her contemporaries are certainly not mere hyperbole. Nicole Cushing delivers the goods in a compelling story told completely in the second person. A bit of an unusual style, but it works so well in this case as we hear the story of a boy who's had thoughts of suicide from the time he was ten until he leaves home at eighteen, and beyond.
Growing up in a mentally abusive family, with no real friends, bullied by kids at school, it's no wonder he's the way he is. Despite all this, the boy manages to deny Mr. Suicide over the years, until his brother introduces him to a low-budget pornographic magazine called Perfect Monsters. The cover features a geriatric, female amputee, naked, heavily wrinkled and doing unspeakable things with her detached artificial leg. That's when things take a marked turn, as Mr. Suicide takes a backseat to a new entity, Great Dark Mouth, who offers something more.
The protagonist in the story is definitely depraved, there are some very disturbing images here, but it's all right at home, in the context of the tale. Filled with richly demented and deformed characters, Mr. Suicide is dark storytelling at it's finest. Just when I thought it couldn't get any better (worse), it does. I loved the use of the Looney Tunes and other cartoon character voices at the end of the book.
By the way, kudos to Zack Mccain for his stunning artwork on the cover.
Mr. Suicide is available in both paperback and e-book formats from Word Horde Publishers.
I can't recommend this book enough. One of the best I've read this year.
Nicole Cushing is a Shirley Jackson Award finalist who's written a number of stand-alone novellas and dozens of short stories. Nicole has been referred to as the literary equivalent of the love child between Jack Ketchum and Poppy Z. Bright. Raised in rural Maryland and now living in southern Indiana, Nicole counts master storyteller Edgar Allen Poe as having had a big influence on her as a writer.
In recent weeks, I'd noticed a bit of a buzz about her debut novel and knew I had to check it out. I'm so glad I did. When I opened the book I right away noticed some very positive blurbs from authors I respect a great deal, including Ray Garton and the aforementioned Jack Ketchum.
After finishing Mr. Suicide, it's difficult to believe this is her first published novel. The kind words from so many of her contemporaries are certainly not mere hyperbole. Nicole Cushing delivers the goods in a compelling story told completely in the second person. A bit of an unusual style, but it works so well in this case as we hear the story of a boy who's had thoughts of suicide from the time he was ten until he leaves home at eighteen, and beyond.
Growing up in a mentally abusive family, with no real friends, bullied by kids at school, it's no wonder he's the way he is. Despite all this, the boy manages to deny Mr. Suicide over the years, until his brother introduces him to a low-budget pornographic magazine called Perfect Monsters. The cover features a geriatric, female amputee, naked, heavily wrinkled and doing unspeakable things with her detached artificial leg. That's when things take a marked turn, as Mr. Suicide takes a backseat to a new entity, Great Dark Mouth, who offers something more.
The protagonist in the story is definitely depraved, there are some very disturbing images here, but it's all right at home, in the context of the tale. Filled with richly demented and deformed characters, Mr. Suicide is dark storytelling at it's finest. Just when I thought it couldn't get any better (worse), it does. I loved the use of the Looney Tunes and other cartoon character voices at the end of the book.
By the way, kudos to Zack Mccain for his stunning artwork on the cover.
Mr. Suicide is available in both paperback and e-book formats from Word Horde Publishers.
I can't recommend this book enough. One of the best I've read this year.
September 20, 2015
I am not someone given to reviewing books.
All I could think while reading this was
"Yep, I still hate The Catcher in the Rye!"
Well, I still do.
Read this novel instead.
All I could think while reading this was
"Yep, I still hate The Catcher in the Rye!"
Well, I still do.
Read this novel instead.
July 2, 2017
You are a psychopath in the making, the progression quickening as you hit your late teens. Mr. Suicide has been speaking to you for some time now, but who is this Great Dark Mouth? Your brother introduces you via “Perfect Monsters,” an underground fetish magazine that is much more. “We’re all like fruit, and He’ll only swallow the ones who have rendered themselves sufficiently ripe with experience.” Perhaps you really are interesting enough to be wanted by Him. After He lays the Three-Fold Path out before you, giving you a chance to finally disappear forever, how will you proceed?
Told in the second person, Mr. Suicide is disturbing and brutal like the best extreme horror novel, but there were many wonderfully odd touches to this, particularly near the end. Merging elements that I enjoy, but have never seen together like this, made the book both unique and memorable. It all worked very well. I am blown away by the depth and the imagery. My first from the author, definitely not the last. Another home run from Word Horde.
Told in the second person, Mr. Suicide is disturbing and brutal like the best extreme horror novel, but there were many wonderfully odd touches to this, particularly near the end. Merging elements that I enjoy, but have never seen together like this, made the book both unique and memorable. It all worked very well. I am blown away by the depth and the imagery. My first from the author, definitely not the last. Another home run from Word Horde.
November 11, 2020
Absolute trash. Confusing, boring, and totally not worth the reader’s attention.
November 30, 2021
One of the most twisted books I've ever read. Cushing's glimpse into the mind of a deranged teenage boy is a rollercoaster through psychedelic Hell. It's always great to see female horror authors write extreme and unflinching horror. CV Hunt and Christine Morgan are good examples, and so is Nicole Cushing. There's a reason this book won a Stoker award. Check it out. Perfect for fans of Ed Lee and American Psycho.
March 19, 2019
"Like everyone else in the world, you've wanted to do things people say you shouldn't do."
I thought I had already written this review, but I was wrong, and now everything has escaped my brain. I appreciated the concept of this book, and a lot of it was pretty creative. It definitely has a different tone since the story is told in second person. It got annoying at times, but it made for a unique experience.
I enjoyed the dark direction that it was heading in, but I had a more difficult time taking it seriously as the book went on. It went in a silly direction, and I ended up losing interest. I was waiting for it to build into something insane, but the ending was so anti-climactic (and not very believable). This one just didn't work for me.
I thought I had already written this review, but I was wrong, and now everything has escaped my brain. I appreciated the concept of this book, and a lot of it was pretty creative. It definitely has a different tone since the story is told in second person. It got annoying at times, but it made for a unique experience.
I enjoyed the dark direction that it was heading in, but I had a more difficult time taking it seriously as the book went on. It went in a silly direction, and I ended up losing interest. I was waiting for it to build into something insane, but the ending was so anti-climactic (and not very believable). This one just didn't work for me.
February 9, 2019
Innovative, captivating, and deeply disturbing, Mr. Suicide is a must-read for horror fans.
The novel is told in second person, which was effective for this book for a few reasons. First, instead of second-person present-tense, which I think is more common (think CYOA-style: you go into the bathroom, you see the bloody knife) this book is still told in the past tense, which gives it more of a classic narrative feel.
It is already a creepy place to be, in the headspace of this obviously disturbed individual, but second person lends the illusion that you are this disturbed individual. Even creepier, since it is told in the past tense, it is like you are telling yourself a story about yourself that you already know the outcome of. All of this is just stage dressing for the dread and disgust yet to come.
You are a young boy who doesn’t have a lot of ambition in life, has never really done well in school or had any friends, and is verbally and mentally abused by his mother. Things slowly drift further and further away from normal until you are in a very bad place, on your own, without anyone to help, except maybe the voice in your head who you call Mr. Suicide, and he whispers to you— wouldn't things be better if you just offed yourself?
From there, the novel spirals out of control—violently, graphically, and most definitely disturbingly. This book is not for you if you can’t handle reading about some majorly f’d up sexual violence.
Slight spoilers in the following paragraph, about my interpretation of the book, not specific plot points.
This is transgressive fiction at its finest. This one worms deep into your brain and starts chewing. It rattled me, and I am not just talking about the violent parts. It is interested in the way a mind can go awry and explores what the consequences of that might be, as depraved and unsettling as they might be.
The novel is told in second person, which was effective for this book for a few reasons. First, instead of second-person present-tense, which I think is more common (think CYOA-style: you go into the bathroom, you see the bloody knife) this book is still told in the past tense, which gives it more of a classic narrative feel.
It is already a creepy place to be, in the headspace of this obviously disturbed individual, but second person lends the illusion that you are this disturbed individual. Even creepier, since it is told in the past tense, it is like you are telling yourself a story about yourself that you already know the outcome of. All of this is just stage dressing for the dread and disgust yet to come.
You are a young boy who doesn’t have a lot of ambition in life, has never really done well in school or had any friends, and is verbally and mentally abused by his mother. Things slowly drift further and further away from normal until you are in a very bad place, on your own, without anyone to help, except maybe the voice in your head who you call Mr. Suicide, and he whispers to you— wouldn't things be better if you just offed yourself?
From there, the novel spirals out of control—violently, graphically, and most definitely disturbingly. This book is not for you if you can’t handle reading about some majorly f’d up sexual violence.
Slight spoilers in the following paragraph, about my interpretation of the book, not specific plot points.
This is transgressive fiction at its finest. This one worms deep into your brain and starts chewing. It rattled me, and I am not just talking about the violent parts. It is interested in the way a mind can go awry and explores what the consequences of that might be, as depraved and unsettling as they might be.
September 18, 2015
"You threw yourself onto the bed and under the covers. Thrashed around in them. Let out little groans you hoped no one could hear. You wished, for a moment you were in the loony bin. There, at least you'd have rubber walls to bounce off of. Here, all you could do was fidget between sheets and regret the that you lacked the courage of your convictions" - Mr Suicide, Nicole Cushing.
Mr Suicide is without a doubt the most horrifying book I've ever read. It depicts extreme violence, gruesome event after one another and it is madness incarnate. The book is structured in a simple way, the author telling a story about you. No names but you do know that you're a boy with glasses living in Louisville, Kentucky. You live with your mom, dad and an older brother who's 10 years older than you.
That said, that's enough to drive this novel and boy are you in for a ride. A vicious, unforgiving, heartless and unforgettable ride. A ride leading to either hell or insanity, take your pick both are equally damaging. You start off at a young age, we read your thoughts and we know straight away you are a damaged person in need of help, you don't want to admit it but you do. With no one to help you, you hear a voice, Mr Suicide, and it tells you horrible things always mocking and prompting you to pull the trigger, year after year.
As you figured by now, the horror in here is not supernatural, there are no frightening creatures, no ghosts, spirits or demons but the horror part comes from the boy's mind. It's like watching a psychopath grow, and there's nothing you can do about it. It's unsettling to the point where I wanted to stop reading the book. I didn't want to know what happens next but then it absorbs you, you can't get away, you just got to know what happens next and I give the book credit on that area. Despite nothing good happening here at all, it gives you despicable event one after another and it is a slippery slide where there's no escape. The events are brutal, graphic and disgusting.
There are moments here where some events are inadvertently funny and they're still terrible moments but also at the end it gets really silly to the point where it felt like you're reading a totally different book and that's my only complaint. Otherwise this is a strong horror book there's a good mix of fantasy and realism and both are equally horrifying. Highly recommended to people who are familiar with Jack Ketchum's work and if you can stomach extreme violence this is for you. If not then don't even think about touching this book specially if you're highly sensitive.
Mr Suicide is without a doubt the most horrifying book I've ever read. It depicts extreme violence, gruesome event after one another and it is madness incarnate. The book is structured in a simple way, the author telling a story about you. No names but you do know that you're a boy with glasses living in Louisville, Kentucky. You live with your mom, dad and an older brother who's 10 years older than you.
That said, that's enough to drive this novel and boy are you in for a ride. A vicious, unforgiving, heartless and unforgettable ride. A ride leading to either hell or insanity, take your pick both are equally damaging. You start off at a young age, we read your thoughts and we know straight away you are a damaged person in need of help, you don't want to admit it but you do. With no one to help you, you hear a voice, Mr Suicide, and it tells you horrible things always mocking and prompting you to pull the trigger, year after year.
As you figured by now, the horror in here is not supernatural, there are no frightening creatures, no ghosts, spirits or demons but the horror part comes from the boy's mind. It's like watching a psychopath grow, and there's nothing you can do about it. It's unsettling to the point where I wanted to stop reading the book. I didn't want to know what happens next but then it absorbs you, you can't get away, you just got to know what happens next and I give the book credit on that area. Despite nothing good happening here at all, it gives you despicable event one after another and it is a slippery slide where there's no escape. The events are brutal, graphic and disgusting.
There are moments here where some events are inadvertently funny and they're still terrible moments but also at the end it gets really silly to the point where it felt like you're reading a totally different book and that's my only complaint. Otherwise this is a strong horror book there's a good mix of fantasy and realism and both are equally horrifying. Highly recommended to people who are familiar with Jack Ketchum's work and if you can stomach extreme violence this is for you. If not then don't even think about touching this book specially if you're highly sensitive.
May 19, 2018
I was not expecting what this book did to me. First off, I'll admit that while reading the first couple of chapters, I was groaning a bit, worried that all I was in for was yet another "fucked up kid from a fucked family" horror story. But the novel was deceiving me, luring me into such reductive assumptions that when the story truly kicked in it felt like a punch to the gut (and the soul).
Told in the second-person POV (which is brilliantly handled by Cushing), "Mr. Suicide" sneaks right into your head and, at times, makes you feel as though YOU are the one the book has been written about. Cushing plays with both the unreliable narrator theme AND Poe's "perverse imp." While Poe often told his tales in the first-person POV, and gave you the impression that you are journeying into madness along with his characters, front row seats as the bats in the belfry begin to multiply and flutter crazily in the dark. Using the second-person POV, Cushing takes Poe one step further. You no longer have front row seats. YOU are mad one.
The books goes places you don't think it will go, and then goes even further. There is sickness in these pages. True, unhinged sickness. Midway through I even had to set the book aside because it was getting to me so much. Perversion of the mind leads to perversion of the body. And Cushing does not flinch from the sexual and violent horrors her character experiences and inflicts upon others. There is a scene involving a bum that turned my stomach and cast very dark shadows across my soul. I couldn't take it, I'll admit it. I needed a break.
The book does veer off in a direction I didn't really see coming, in the third act. Admittedly, I was a bit disappointed, as I felt that the horrors I had just viscerally, emotionally, and mentally experienced were under threat of negation. I wasn't sure how I felt about that. I worried that maybe Cushing was pulling back a bit, after having gone so far.
But, upon finishing the book, I think where it goes is the right path, and it ends the way it should. In fact, I'm almost relieved. I needed to remember I was dealing with an unreliable narrator, after all.
What I'm saying is, this book brilliantly takes you into the mind of true madness. Whether you can make the trip, and whether you feel the trip was worth the horror, is up to you. For me, it works. Grotesquely. Beautifully. Brilliantly. This book will remain with me for a long, long time.
This is real horror, folks. Caveat emptor.
Told in the second-person POV (which is brilliantly handled by Cushing), "Mr. Suicide" sneaks right into your head and, at times, makes you feel as though YOU are the one the book has been written about. Cushing plays with both the unreliable narrator theme AND Poe's "perverse imp." While Poe often told his tales in the first-person POV, and gave you the impression that you are journeying into madness along with his characters, front row seats as the bats in the belfry begin to multiply and flutter crazily in the dark. Using the second-person POV, Cushing takes Poe one step further. You no longer have front row seats. YOU are mad one.
The books goes places you don't think it will go, and then goes even further. There is sickness in these pages. True, unhinged sickness. Midway through I even had to set the book aside because it was getting to me so much. Perversion of the mind leads to perversion of the body. And Cushing does not flinch from the sexual and violent horrors her character experiences and inflicts upon others. There is a scene involving a bum that turned my stomach and cast very dark shadows across my soul. I couldn't take it, I'll admit it. I needed a break.
The book does veer off in a direction I didn't really see coming, in the third act. Admittedly, I was a bit disappointed, as I felt that the horrors I had just viscerally, emotionally, and mentally experienced were under threat of negation. I wasn't sure how I felt about that. I worried that maybe Cushing was pulling back a bit, after having gone so far.
But, upon finishing the book, I think where it goes is the right path, and it ends the way it should. In fact, I'm almost relieved. I needed to remember I was dealing with an unreliable narrator, after all.
What I'm saying is, this book brilliantly takes you into the mind of true madness. Whether you can make the trip, and whether you feel the trip was worth the horror, is up to you. For me, it works. Grotesquely. Beautifully. Brilliantly. This book will remain with me for a long, long time.
This is real horror, folks. Caveat emptor.
July 14, 2015
Restricted until Juky 15
Review: MR. SUICIDE by Nicole Cushing
Author Nicole Cushing is one of a kind. I discovered this when I read CHILDREN OF NO ONE, published by DarkFuse in 2013. I was astounded at the reach of her imagination. So naturally, I leapt at the opportunity to review her newest, MR. SUICIDE (a Word Horde publication) and needless to say, I am once again awestruck. MR. SUICIDE is an outré story about a boy whose childhood is caged in emotional and mental destruction. Think "Mommie Dearest" with not as much physical violence. Think parents with serious disorders--or rather, one disturbed parent and one cop-out co-dependent. Consider four offspring, two who "escape" and two who are left at home, rife to descend into madness. In lesser hands, MR. SUICIDE would be Lovecraftian, but Nicole Cushing is never derivative; and so, her creation, the Great Dark Mouth, is entirely new, different, and horrifying. MR. SUICIDE really resonated with me, and I am most eager to await its reappearance.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 7, 2020
Even better than expected
This book is difficult to take at points but pays off in many ways. It almost doesn't do it justice to just consider it a horror book, though it definitely qualifies
This book is difficult to take at points but pays off in many ways. It almost doesn't do it justice to just consider it a horror book, though it definitely qualifies
June 23, 2016
When reading horror fiction, there are typically "levels" of what the writer is trying to achieve, dependent on their skill, intelligence and (it seems somewhat inescapable) personal proximity to/experience with a nihilistic vision of the universe.
Nicole Cushing is one of the few authors I would confidently place alongside Thomas Ligotti as someone who works in furthest Stygian depths of bleak darkness that the genre is likely to turn up. The worldview on offer is not one of simple monsters, or murderers (though they do appear), but of a fundamental malignancy to the entire structure of reality, one that does not merely remain contained on the pages but bubbles with a foul rot, a filthy grue of utter hopelessness that threatens at any moment to consume the reader with the selfsame decay.
This book, "Mr Suicide", offers one of the most grotesque and awful pictures of a deranged individual I've ever encountered. Through the unusual second-person narrative we are plunged into the mindset of a teenage boy who has fantasized of self-destruction since the age of ten and now, at the age of eighteen, seems on the brink of descending into full blown Dahmer-esque annihilation. There are sentences and images on offer here which made me turn away from the pages in shock, there are nightmare word combinations that you wouldn't even dream of stringing together in the maddest laboratory. This is ur-horror, taking Lovecraft's cosmic pantheon and Ligotti's black festering absurdity and distilling it into a weapons-grade insanity.
I fear discussing the ending of the book for ruining the effect the climax will have on the reader, suffice to say that just when I was settling into accepting this as just an incredibly well-done piece of antinatal serial killer nightmare-fuel, Nicole Cushing surprised me by going in an entirely unexpected direction. Perhaps the most shocking thing about this book is the fact that despite it being pulled squirming from the blackest depths of foaming galactic gutters, it also carries with it a wickedly absurd gallows humour, and a tender, albeit utterly warped, sense of grace. This grace is hard won, totally fucked up, but undeniably human.
Nicole Cushing is one of the few authors I would confidently place alongside Thomas Ligotti as someone who works in furthest Stygian depths of bleak darkness that the genre is likely to turn up. The worldview on offer is not one of simple monsters, or murderers (though they do appear), but of a fundamental malignancy to the entire structure of reality, one that does not merely remain contained on the pages but bubbles with a foul rot, a filthy grue of utter hopelessness that threatens at any moment to consume the reader with the selfsame decay.
This book, "Mr Suicide", offers one of the most grotesque and awful pictures of a deranged individual I've ever encountered. Through the unusual second-person narrative we are plunged into the mindset of a teenage boy who has fantasized of self-destruction since the age of ten and now, at the age of eighteen, seems on the brink of descending into full blown Dahmer-esque annihilation. There are sentences and images on offer here which made me turn away from the pages in shock, there are nightmare word combinations that you wouldn't even dream of stringing together in the maddest laboratory. This is ur-horror, taking Lovecraft's cosmic pantheon and Ligotti's black festering absurdity and distilling it into a weapons-grade insanity.
I fear discussing the ending of the book for ruining the effect the climax will have on the reader, suffice to say that just when I was settling into accepting this as just an incredibly well-done piece of antinatal serial killer nightmare-fuel, Nicole Cushing surprised me by going in an entirely unexpected direction. Perhaps the most shocking thing about this book is the fact that despite it being pulled squirming from the blackest depths of foaming galactic gutters, it also carries with it a wickedly absurd gallows humour, and a tender, albeit utterly warped, sense of grace. This grace is hard won, totally fucked up, but undeniably human.
May 22, 2016
With "Mr. Suicide", Cushing has given us a blood-stained window into one young man's personal hell. Vividly brutal and creatively written, this novel elevates the extreme horror genre into something more cerebral, more emotionally charged.
From a second-person perspective that makes it all the more personal, we follow a teenage boy through his disintegration, watching on as he is tormented by his abusive mother, abandoned by his schoolmates and teachers, and is pulled into dark conversations with the titular character. His descent leads him into a lust for crippled bodies and derealization, taking him on a violent tour of transient life as he searches for his own twisted sort of meaning in a world without empathy and hope.
As well as being a stellar horror novel, "Mr. Suicide" is also a harrowing story that deals with the sensitive subjects of child abuse and mental illness with a delicate and knowing hand. There are so many novels out there that try to tackle these subjects, and most of them come off as inauthentic and cliche, because they are. Cushing's book suffers none of these flaws, but instead treats its source material with realism and an uncommon tenderness, the author clearly wanting the real-life horrors of these issues to be addressed. She recently snagged a Bram Stoker Award for this effort, and it was well-deserved.
Nicole Cushing is a name I'll be watching from now on.
From a second-person perspective that makes it all the more personal, we follow a teenage boy through his disintegration, watching on as he is tormented by his abusive mother, abandoned by his schoolmates and teachers, and is pulled into dark conversations with the titular character. His descent leads him into a lust for crippled bodies and derealization, taking him on a violent tour of transient life as he searches for his own twisted sort of meaning in a world without empathy and hope.
As well as being a stellar horror novel, "Mr. Suicide" is also a harrowing story that deals with the sensitive subjects of child abuse and mental illness with a delicate and knowing hand. There are so many novels out there that try to tackle these subjects, and most of them come off as inauthentic and cliche, because they are. Cushing's book suffers none of these flaws, but instead treats its source material with realism and an uncommon tenderness, the author clearly wanting the real-life horrors of these issues to be addressed. She recently snagged a Bram Stoker Award for this effort, and it was well-deserved.
Nicole Cushing is a name I'll be watching from now on.
March 21, 2019
A sick little twist of a novel that revels in depravity. It might be off putting for most if it weren't for a compelling main character. More gross than actually scary, novel moves briskly enough so you're not dwelling too much on "WTF did I just read?"
Recommended, but you may lose your lunch during some sequences
Recommended, but you may lose your lunch during some sequences
December 5, 2021
Exceptionally bleak, very extreme, somehow quite funny. The writing style was interesting and the subject matter very heavy. Worth reading if you're into Ligotti-esque weird fiction and extreme horror because this is both. I'll be thinking about this one for a long time, no doubt.
June 20, 2017
Hayatımda okuduğum en sıkıcı kitaplar arasında ilk beşe girer. %20'de pes ediyorum. Önermem. Sakın ha...
November 30, 2021
4.5 stars rounded up.
I was really on the fence with this rating. The writing style (second person!) was great and the plot was intense, heavy, and engaging. I had a hard time putting the book down in that regard. On the other hand, the content at times was so brutally disgusting, bringing my mind to places it had never been, that I had to set the book down and do something involving unicorns and rainbows for a little bit.
In the end, all that awful content had meaning. It was there for a reason, not there to simply shock the reader. This book is deeper than I expected in the end, and honestly the most fucked up part of the whole book is probably the ending. I'll be thinking about this one for a long time.
Recommended for: almost nobody, but if you're curious come to talk to me 😂
I was really on the fence with this rating. The writing style (second person!) was great and the plot was intense, heavy, and engaging. I had a hard time putting the book down in that regard. On the other hand, the content at times was so brutally disgusting, bringing my mind to places it had never been, that I had to set the book down and do something involving unicorns and rainbows for a little bit.
In the end, all that awful content had meaning. It was there for a reason, not there to simply shock the reader. This book is deeper than I expected in the end, and honestly the most fucked up part of the whole book is probably the ending. I'll be thinking about this one for a long time.
Recommended for: almost nobody, but if you're curious come to talk to me 😂
August 27, 2016
(Originally appeared on my website, the Conqueror Weird. This, by the way, eventually won the Bram Stoker Award.)
We all have bad thoughts.
Don’t even try to deny that – of course you have. You can’t feel bad about it. And I don’t think most of you will deny it – many of you, like myself, have reconciled ourselves with it; you just don’t like to admit it. Of course you don’t admit that you have fleeting visions of harm against others, indulgence in decadent behavior, suicide, murder. Society doesn’t accept it (though what is society but an elaborate, tragic game we have created for ourselves to play?). But its not like the thoughts are permanent. They come and then they drift away, a brittle leaf blown away by a gentle autumn breeze.
How dreadful it would be if those thoughts didn’t permit themselves to leave, if they became independent of you and were untouched by your morality.
That is – sort of – the launching-off point of Nicole Cushing‘s 2015 novel Mr. Suicide (ominously subtitled “a Novel of the Great Dark Mouth”), which is a nominee for 2016’s Bram Stoker Awards (“Superior Achievement in a First Novel”). Even more impressive, Cushing’s collection The Mirrors is also a nominee. Even more impressive, they are both debuts. Which means, of course, you should go buy both right now. Word Horde, which published Mr. Suicide, is notoriously good at publishing amazing work (which is why I have reviewed them since this blog has begun), and I do congratulate both Miss Cushing and Word Horde on the first Bram Stoker Award nomination.
But I digress. Mr. Suicide is a tour-de-force of horror. How to begin? Where to start?
Let me say first that this novel (both transgressive and artful, which is hard to achieve) has no interest getting you comfortable. This is, of course, evident from the title, but also the narrative format in which it is presented. The entire book is written in second person. Yes, second person. That is a ballsy thing to do for a debut novel, but Cushing doesn’t only pull it off well, she pulls it off perfectly. It isn’t just that the second person narrative is written fantastically and effectively through the entirety of the novel, but that it is so well done it becomes so intense for the reader that they have to put the book down. You may be sitting in a chair, yes, your rational mind knows that. But this book doesn’t tap into your rational mind, and things will start to feel so personal to you that I can almost guarantee you’ll need to take a breather in the midst of it.
The plot itself is a Poe-esque nightmare of psychological horror. The protagonist (“you”), a boy trapped in an abusive family with an insane older brother and two escaped siblings, starts, at a young age, to have an inner dialogue of sorts. There is a voice (in his head or in reality, who knows?) called “Mr. Suicide”, who is exactly what he/she/it sounds like. He encourages our protagonist to, well, commit suicide, and is exceedingly creepy about it.
‘Why not today?’ Mr. Suicide asked you. ‘It’s summer, and there’s no school and you’re stuck at home with your bitchy mother and a carton of Ajax.’
The boy does not indulge in Mr. Suicide. He does not ignore him, however; at times he actually engages in passionate and disturbing conversations with him. These gradually reveal more and more about the boy’s character. Despite his high intelligence he is behind in schoolwork and is a social scapegoat.
Home life is hardly better, of course; his mother is abusive and constantly berating him, his father is a good-for-nothing puppet, and his one remaining brother is almost completely insane. In an unbearably sad way Mr. Suicide really is his only returning friend.
While at first glance this is all psychological horror – Mr. Suicide could very easily be seen as a sort of dual personality – this book is not so easily defined. Mr. Suicide knows intimate details of other people’s lives (this is used to particularly chilling effect in chapter two), and makes broad statements about humanity in a decidedly disturbing way. As many of you will grow to realize, this pleasant, eerie ambiguity is one of my favorite things to see in literature.
At the age of eighteen, though, he leaves home and finds another force, an older, more powerful force that claims it can help him if he follows a very grisly set of instructions. The misanthrope agrees, and subjects himself to the will of the Great Dark Mouth…
…well, I don’t want to spoil anything.
Perhaps the most predominant influence is Edgar Allan Poe. The macabre personifications of mental disease are reminiscent of quite a few of his works (“The Imp of the Perverse” comes to mind). And the prose is sheer perfection. Another possible influence, with bleak tones of mental disease and juvenile crime, is A Clockwork Orange, though Mr. Suicide trumps that by a mile. It’s really one of the greatest novels ever written.
Let me just finish off this review with a few words: despite the extreme intensity of this astounding book, which dances past taboos as smoothly as a stream, Mr. Suicide is, at its heart, a coming-0f-age book.
A really, really messed-up coming-of-age book.
We all have bad thoughts.
Don’t even try to deny that – of course you have. You can’t feel bad about it. And I don’t think most of you will deny it – many of you, like myself, have reconciled ourselves with it; you just don’t like to admit it. Of course you don’t admit that you have fleeting visions of harm against others, indulgence in decadent behavior, suicide, murder. Society doesn’t accept it (though what is society but an elaborate, tragic game we have created for ourselves to play?). But its not like the thoughts are permanent. They come and then they drift away, a brittle leaf blown away by a gentle autumn breeze.
How dreadful it would be if those thoughts didn’t permit themselves to leave, if they became independent of you and were untouched by your morality.
That is – sort of – the launching-off point of Nicole Cushing‘s 2015 novel Mr. Suicide (ominously subtitled “a Novel of the Great Dark Mouth”), which is a nominee for 2016’s Bram Stoker Awards (“Superior Achievement in a First Novel”). Even more impressive, Cushing’s collection The Mirrors is also a nominee. Even more impressive, they are both debuts. Which means, of course, you should go buy both right now. Word Horde, which published Mr. Suicide, is notoriously good at publishing amazing work (which is why I have reviewed them since this blog has begun), and I do congratulate both Miss Cushing and Word Horde on the first Bram Stoker Award nomination.
But I digress. Mr. Suicide is a tour-de-force of horror. How to begin? Where to start?
Let me say first that this novel (both transgressive and artful, which is hard to achieve) has no interest getting you comfortable. This is, of course, evident from the title, but also the narrative format in which it is presented. The entire book is written in second person. Yes, second person. That is a ballsy thing to do for a debut novel, but Cushing doesn’t only pull it off well, she pulls it off perfectly. It isn’t just that the second person narrative is written fantastically and effectively through the entirety of the novel, but that it is so well done it becomes so intense for the reader that they have to put the book down. You may be sitting in a chair, yes, your rational mind knows that. But this book doesn’t tap into your rational mind, and things will start to feel so personal to you that I can almost guarantee you’ll need to take a breather in the midst of it.
The plot itself is a Poe-esque nightmare of psychological horror. The protagonist (“you”), a boy trapped in an abusive family with an insane older brother and two escaped siblings, starts, at a young age, to have an inner dialogue of sorts. There is a voice (in his head or in reality, who knows?) called “Mr. Suicide”, who is exactly what he/she/it sounds like. He encourages our protagonist to, well, commit suicide, and is exceedingly creepy about it.
‘Why not today?’ Mr. Suicide asked you. ‘It’s summer, and there’s no school and you’re stuck at home with your bitchy mother and a carton of Ajax.’
The boy does not indulge in Mr. Suicide. He does not ignore him, however; at times he actually engages in passionate and disturbing conversations with him. These gradually reveal more and more about the boy’s character. Despite his high intelligence he is behind in schoolwork and is a social scapegoat.
Home life is hardly better, of course; his mother is abusive and constantly berating him, his father is a good-for-nothing puppet, and his one remaining brother is almost completely insane. In an unbearably sad way Mr. Suicide really is his only returning friend.
While at first glance this is all psychological horror – Mr. Suicide could very easily be seen as a sort of dual personality – this book is not so easily defined. Mr. Suicide knows intimate details of other people’s lives (this is used to particularly chilling effect in chapter two), and makes broad statements about humanity in a decidedly disturbing way. As many of you will grow to realize, this pleasant, eerie ambiguity is one of my favorite things to see in literature.
At the age of eighteen, though, he leaves home and finds another force, an older, more powerful force that claims it can help him if he follows a very grisly set of instructions. The misanthrope agrees, and subjects himself to the will of the Great Dark Mouth…
…well, I don’t want to spoil anything.
Perhaps the most predominant influence is Edgar Allan Poe. The macabre personifications of mental disease are reminiscent of quite a few of his works (“The Imp of the Perverse” comes to mind). And the prose is sheer perfection. Another possible influence, with bleak tones of mental disease and juvenile crime, is A Clockwork Orange, though Mr. Suicide trumps that by a mile. It’s really one of the greatest novels ever written.
Let me just finish off this review with a few words: despite the extreme intensity of this astounding book, which dances past taboos as smoothly as a stream, Mr. Suicide is, at its heart, a coming-0f-age book.
A really, really messed-up coming-of-age book.
December 21, 2015
What to say about this book? If you don't mind feeling grimy and partly disgusted (with yourself, the writer, humanity, our very existence) for however long it takes to finish, you may get some grim satisfaction out of Mr Suicide. I'm partial to these sentiments myself, making this a fantastic and compelling read (finished in two or three intensely focused sittings). Cushing's writing is simple yet original. The second-person narrative is a technique I've encountered but twice in my adult reading (though it was ubiquitous in the choose-your-own-path adventure books of childhood), and it is used to amazing effect here, placing the reader square within the protagonist's (antagonist's) own noggin. Stewart O'Nan used the second-person to similar, horrendously compelling effect in A Prayer for the Dying, but the unnamed narrator of Mr Suicide is not nearly as sympathetic. Your family is a self-absorbed mess, your schooling a distraction and nuisance, existence itself constant struggle and pain - Mr. Suicide beckons you into his embrace. But soon, thanks to a nasty skin mag and a strangely, earnestly ?helpful? brother, something better comes along, in the form of The Great Dark Mouth. 'Better', of course, being relative in pessimistic terms.
This short novel will grip you from start to finish, if, as mentioned, you can endure the sensation of grime being smeared all over your mind and body as you tear through its filthy pages.
The Great Dark Mouth awaits your presence.
This short novel will grip you from start to finish, if, as mentioned, you can endure the sensation of grime being smeared all over your mind and body as you tear through its filthy pages.
The Great Dark Mouth awaits your presence.
January 11, 2020
The opening chapters are a stereotypical rant of anger and despair. Nothing new as this character can’t lift the story beyond teenage rage and suicidal angst.
With a tone set so low, I find it easy to stop after 60 pages.
With a tone set so low, I find it easy to stop after 60 pages.
March 18, 2016
A harsh horror story, and an uncompromising portrait of severe mental illness. Possibly the bleakest imaginable world view, told in second person from the point of view of a miserable outcast young boy who hears Mr. Suicide whispering, encouraging him to harm himself. As he ages into adolescence, he hopes for some escape, but his horrible experiences both at school and at home offer him no escape. Quite original, strongly told, and certainly not for everyone.
August 14, 2016
I read this straight after Nicole's novella The sadists bible and these two books compliment each other perfectly!
Once again Nicole refuses to hold back and has produced a disturbing horror story that is masterfully written. She uses the second person perspective perfectly whilst giving you an insight in to the mind of the truly deranged pottagonist.
I eagerly look forward to more stories in the twisted universe of the great dark mouth
Once again Nicole refuses to hold back and has produced a disturbing horror story that is masterfully written. She uses the second person perspective perfectly whilst giving you an insight in to the mind of the truly deranged pottagonist.
I eagerly look forward to more stories in the twisted universe of the great dark mouth
November 24, 2016
3.5 stars if I'm getting technical. I freaked out reading this book when I found out it was set in my city. I freaked out more when I found it was set in my precise neighborhood. Random and weird. I appreciated the taboo subject matter and the understated horror. The book doesn't try to scare or shock you, but you're left gasping in horror many times regardless. I do think there are some plot holes disguised as make-your-own-conclusions suggestions, so that was my one issue with the book.
February 20, 2016
Full review coming. Believe the hype this is a fantastic horror novel
June 6, 2019
Nothing is worse than a promising novel that has lost its way. Sadly, Nicole Cushing’s Mr. Suicide follows that sad mediocre path.
The first chapter really sucked me in. It tackles the subject of murder or more importantly, the average person’s views on it. I think everyone has thought about killing someone; the guy who cut you off in traffic or the girl that broke your heart. And that Cushing addresses these socially unacceptable thoughts so honestly is what initially drew me to the story.
You can read Jennifer's full review at Horror DNA by clicking here.
The first chapter really sucked me in. It tackles the subject of murder or more importantly, the average person’s views on it. I think everyone has thought about killing someone; the guy who cut you off in traffic or the girl that broke your heart. And that Cushing addresses these socially unacceptable thoughts so honestly is what initially drew me to the story.
You can read Jennifer's full review at Horror DNA by clicking here.
June 8, 2020
“Perhaps, in the teacher’s eyes, you were patient zero in a possible epidemic of apathy, and you needed to be neutralized immediately.”
MR. SUICIDE is an ode to those who dig Thomas Ligotti’s style horror. The novel follows the existential journey of a teen who goes from considering suicide to wishing to be unborn, his existence erased. The quest to becoming unborn involves a three step process, the first being the “exotic depths of squishy-gushy.” Cushing’s use of second person point of view brings the reader uncomfortably close to the action. The tale is disturbing and at times imbibed with dark humor, but never fails to be unforgettable.
MR. SUICIDE is an ode to those who dig Thomas Ligotti’s style horror. The novel follows the existential journey of a teen who goes from considering suicide to wishing to be unborn, his existence erased. The quest to becoming unborn involves a three step process, the first being the “exotic depths of squishy-gushy.” Cushing’s use of second person point of view brings the reader uncomfortably close to the action. The tale is disturbing and at times imbibed with dark humor, but never fails to be unforgettable.
June 5, 2022
I've since read nearly all of Nicole Cushing's work, but this was my introduction to her and I will try to write this review as if I don't know her "World".
Overall, this book is brilliant. Reading such a graphic book in the second person is truly eerie, particularly when the book is so abstract, vivid, violent, and personal. That being said... Cushing crushed it. It's a gamble to tell the reader an account of all the horrible things they've thought and done throughout the past, but she writes it in a way that makes these things relatable... a few thoughts as an angsty teen, the occasional lash-out, then a progression to the utterly absurd (or can we just call it Cosmic Horror?), but she does it SO gracefully that even the most horrible acts in the novel are almost relatable. The beauty of her Cosmic Horror is that it's so subtle. I REALLY don't want to spoil anything, so I'll leave out details, but there's a truly layered effect when the reader (me) is left wondering if the main character (also me!) is experiencing and observing all this craziness or if he (me) is just going crazy! Also, is Cushing writing this in second person because it's too personal to write in first? Perhaps...
This book is layered, thought-provoking, graphic AF, and still so beautiful. I loved that the ending had a clear point, but left the reader wondering if it was a happy ending or a tragic departure of character. I saw a glimmer of hope, but that's just me (the main character ;) )
Overall, this book is brilliant. Reading such a graphic book in the second person is truly eerie, particularly when the book is so abstract, vivid, violent, and personal. That being said... Cushing crushed it. It's a gamble to tell the reader an account of all the horrible things they've thought and done throughout the past, but she writes it in a way that makes these things relatable... a few thoughts as an angsty teen, the occasional lash-out, then a progression to the utterly absurd (or can we just call it Cosmic Horror?), but she does it SO gracefully that even the most horrible acts in the novel are almost relatable. The beauty of her Cosmic Horror is that it's so subtle. I REALLY don't want to spoil anything, so I'll leave out details, but there's a truly layered effect when the reader (me) is left wondering if the main character (also me!) is experiencing and observing all this craziness or if he (me) is just going crazy! Also, is Cushing writing this in second person because it's too personal to write in first? Perhaps...
This book is layered, thought-provoking, graphic AF, and still so beautiful. I loved that the ending had a clear point, but left the reader wondering if it was a happy ending or a tragic departure of character. I saw a glimmer of hope, but that's just me (the main character ;) )
August 17, 2024
Somebody get this kid a Lament Configuration. He can give the cenobites some new ideas or at least a run for their money, since I doubt he'd share his ideas with them.
The beginning had me hooked. Then things got weirder and weirder, then twisted, then gory, and then downright grotesque. An extreme horror that wasn't in your face gross and disgusting just to get a reaction from the reader. There was actually an in depth story/concept throughout the book that was surrounded by the disturbing.
The beginning had me hooked. Then things got weirder and weirder, then twisted, then gory, and then downright grotesque. An extreme horror that wasn't in your face gross and disgusting just to get a reaction from the reader. There was actually an in depth story/concept throughout the book that was surrounded by the disturbing.
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