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402 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 19, 2021
How many times could a man break before he shattered forever?
And that was why Vasili loved him. There was an elegance in Nikolas Yazdan’s brutishness. He had honor, integrity, and strength. Things Vasili had forsaken long ago in order to survive. He made Vasili see himself differently.
Was it better to abandon a love to save it or to hold it close as it died?
“What do you have in this world that’s worth dying for?” He had one thing. A dream of a cabin in the woods and a man whose strength was endless and honor was true. A better man than Vasili.
“As Etara as my witness, I will forever stand beside you, Your Highness.” It was the first time he hadn’t used Your Highness as an insult, and, of course, it crippled Vasili’s determination to send him away. He hated him for that but loved him too.
For all his rage and disgust, for the new lines around his eyes and his haunted expression, Nikolas still believed in hope. How could a man endure so much darkness and still see the light?
Vasili was still a manipulative prick, and Niko was still the stubborn soldier, but together they were something else. Something beautiful. And powerful.
He had not meant to fall in love with Nikolas Yazdan. Use him, yes. But never love him. He’d been so long without love, he hadn’t seen it stalking him until it had struck. And now he was defenseless against it.
⋰⋱⋰⋱⋰⋱*Might Contains Spoilers*⋰⋱⋰⋱⋰⋱
❝this house is not a cabin, and seran is not a forest, but will you stay and build a life with me, vasili?❞
❝as etara as my witness, i will forever stand beside you, your highness.❞
❝do you want a cottage?❞ niko asked, awed at the idea of a future and spending it with Vasili.
❝ah… but i’m far from the good man you promised you’d save.❞
niko gathered the prince’s hand in his, their rings glinting side by side. ❝who wants a good man when they can have a vicious prince?❞
He’d watch the world burn to see his prince safe.
This man who challenged him, defied him, and so thoroughly understood him that he had no choice but to love him in return.
Nikolas laughed a deep, dark chuckle and stepped closer, filling the space between them. “Defensive, prince?” He reached out a hand and stroked a lock of hair away from Vasili’s scarred eye. Anyone else would have received a merciless backhand for daring to touch him, but Nikolas’s brazen familiarity momentarily stole all Vasili’s thoughts, even the bad ones. He’d spent so long afraid, lashing out whenever anyone strayed too close, that trusting Nikolas was terrifying, but also freeing
Vasili’s only wish was to be free.
“Part of me hates Vasili.”
Niko braced an arm against the thawing ground. “He’s an easy man to hate.”
“Harder to love?”
“Something like that.”
Vasili closed his eye and breathed out slowly. “It never ends, does it?”He loved Vasili Caville, the cursed prince, the voiceless man, all of him.
Vasili Caville might be the bravest damn soul he’d ever met. He’d do any damn thing for him.Vasili was close now. His entire body burned with dark flame. He’d likened the Cavilles to a candle. Everyone had expected him to burn out long before now. But he hadn’t. Because Vasili Caville didn’t fucking surrender to anyone or anything, least of all some ancient curse. Vasili still held on, somewhere, somehow. Niko believed in him.Vasili was so close now every line on his face stood out, every horrible scar marking the loss of his eye and a past he’d fought so hard to survive. “I told you this life is not for us.”
Vasili truly was a work of art. One made of razor blades.
In the quiet moments, and the moments when he’d stripped all his layers back, Vasili was spellbinding. Vulnerable and fierce. Niko’s Vasili.This so desperately damaged prince was his entire world and had been for far longer than he’d realized. Maybe since that first kiss in a starlit field.“Who wants a good man when they can have a vicious prince?”
He was heat and fire, rock and iron, and after everything they'd survived, after every hurt and obstacle, impossibly, Nikolas Yazdan was Vasili's.
Nikolas kissed him then - so softly, so simply. It was nothing, really. A brush of the lips, but if it were the last thing Vasili felt, he'd gladly take its touch with him to meet the gods.
Niko blinked at the man beside him. Because there he was. His hidden Vasili.
The man he loved.
He wanted to build a new life somewhere far away from it all, where the prince didn't have the weight of a crown on his head or a curse in his veins. Just a cabin in the woods, an open fire, and a burbling brook.
But those dreams were a fool's fantasy.
He'd seen this done. He'd keep his word because it was all he had left to give the man he loved.
Vasili's last order would also be his own.
He was wildness, like the sea, and Vasili would willingly drown in him.
Of course, Nikolas wasn't a threat - well, not like this. He was a threat at other times. But in these quiet moments, he was everything Vasili needed him to be and so much more.
“Would you betray me, Nikolas?”
“Never.” His gaze fixed on Vasili’s.