- Leopold Fissue: [after Warren has turned down Fissue's proposal of laundering money on stolen diamonds] Nothing is impossible, Mr. Warren, if the necessity of doing it is great enough.
- Francis Monroe Warren II: Aren't you being a little presumptious?
- Leopold Fissue: Not at all. I'm merely suggesting that you're going to take my account and help me.
- Francis Monroe Warren II: Why am I?
- Leopold Fissue: Because, Mr. Warren, men like ourselves whose lives are... well... how should I say... uh, rather... complicated don't dare offend anyone, do they?
- Police Insp. Charles M. Mason: Say, listen, doctor. This is very important. I want another autopsy on Fissue. And be very careful this time. It's possible he was murdered by some obscure drug that you might have overlooked.
- Coroner: I'm very sorry, Inspector. But I can't make another autopsy. Why not? Because the body was cremated yesterday.
- Police Insp. Charles M. Mason: All right. Then don't do it.
- Francis Monroe Warren II: [as Det. 'Hoppy' Hopkins tries unsuccessfully to break open a door] Try using your head.
- Det. 'Hoppy' Hopkins: Right.
- [almost head-butts the door]
- Police Insp. Charles M. Mason: A jewel importer keeps his stuff in his safe. He doesn't run around with it in his pockets.
- Francis Monroe Warren II: Suppose he took it out of the safe for some purpose?
- Police Insp. Charles M. Mason: He could have been wearing a kilt, but he wasn't.
- Francis Monroe Warren II: Gee Blondie, words come out of you just as beautiful as oil comes out of a derrick!
- Mr. Wilfred: I know my rights. I'm a taxpayer, wee!
- Det. 'Hoppy' Hopkins: Yeah, well, we're you're goin', you won't have to pay no taxes, see!
- Police Insp. Charles M. Mason: [Showing Francis the clue of a woman's broken high heel] What do you make of this, my omniscient friend?
- Francis Monroe Warren II: Why don't you see a fortune teller?
- Mrs. Archer: The idea of bringing me to a place like this.
- Rita Warren: I didn't bring you, you insisted upon coming.
- Francis Monroe Warren II: If I don't clean this Fisher case up in a hurry, we're going to wind up in divorce court.
- Mr. Wilfred: You and me, chief?
- Francis Monroe Warren II: No! Mrs. Warren and I.
- Francis Monroe Warren II: What're you doing here?
- Det. 'Hoppy' Hopkins: We ask the questions.
- Francis Monroe Warren II, Det. 'Hoppy' Hopkins: OK, how long have you been here?
- Police Insp. Charles M. Mason: You wouldn't by any chance be insulting me would you?
- Francis Monroe Warren II: Oh, no, I was just being philosophic.
- Det. 'Hoppy' Hopkins: Oh, so that's your racket, huh?
- Police Insp. Charles M. Mason: [the police are leaving, but Warren has decided to remain behind at Fissue's apartment] Aren't you coming?
- Francis Monroe Warren II: No thanks.
- Det. 'Hoppy' Hopkins: What are you gonna' hang around here for?
- Francis Monroe Warren II: Why, to find out who murdered Fissue, of course.
- Det. 'Hoppy' Hopkins: He can't help it, Inspector. Black *is* white, you know.
- Police Insp. Charles M. Mason: Well, don't come to me for sympathy if you get arrested for trespassing.
- Francis Monroe Warren II: And don't you come to me if you get arrested for drawing your salary under false pretenses.
- Francis Monroe Warren II: [Ahmed had feigned inability to speak English when the police questioned him, in Fissue's apartment] So you're only unable to speak English to the police, is that it?
- Ahmed: Precisely. When I was a child in Bombay, sir, my head came in vulgar contact with a policeman's stick. The incident made a deep impression. Ever since I've not been fond of the police.
- Francis Monroe Warren II: Well, I can understand that. But you, uh, wouldn't mind giving me a little information, would you?
- Ahmed: Of course not, sir. With a gentleman I am happy to discuss anything.
- Francis Monroe Warren II: [on the phone with Insp. Mason, talking about Blondie White] You saw her? Well, naturally she'll deny it. She'll deny anything. She's a woman. What do you expect?
- Police Insp. Charles M. Mason: Even a stupid professional like myself would know the difference between an airtight alibi and a lie. The lady was in the dentist's chair between the hours of 4:30 and 6:00 on Tuesday afternoon which *more* than covers the time during which Fissue died... Yes, "dentist." Even burlesque queens can have toothaches, you know.
- Blondie White: [after the backer of her burlesque show comes on to her backstage] You may own this show, but haven't even got a lease on me!
Contribute to this page
Suggest an edit or add missing content
