User reviews

Roy Orbison and Sammy Jackson are both spies for the Confederacy who are planning on robbing a gold shipment. They pose as patent medicine salesmen and Roy also doubles as a dance hall singer.

This was the film that single-handedly killed Roy Orbison's acting career. It's hard to believe now, but in the 60s he was a VERY hot commodity and the Beatles were at one time HIS opening act! This movie was an attempt to make him like the new Elvis in movies, though his ability to play a romantic lead or show any emotion was nil. Perhaps given time he might have been a decent actor, but here he just isn't given much to work with and he just seems like a fish out of water.

So what's wrong with the film? Much of the problem were the songs. While most of Roy's songs were actually very enjoyable (despite having the sound of an electric guitar and orchestra in the Old West), a few of the song in the film were just awful. The "Goodtime Party" song was just awful and the music and clapping were way out of sync. In addition, there was a song by the dance hall girls without Roy near the beginning of the film that had me pondering suicide--it was THAT bad and the lyrics were wretched. The title alone of the song pretty much says it all--"Snuggle Huggle" and it was the only song in the film Roy didn't write or co-write.

As for the writing, it was generally fair to poor except when it came to the "kooky Indians". These supposed Indians were terribly unfunny and were less believable as Indians than when Mel Brooks played one in BLAZING SADDLES (and his was intended to be bad).

Overall, this is a very limp film only of interest to bad film freaks and the curious.

Yes, the movie "The Fastest Guitar Alive" was terrible and Roy Orbison was not an actor. But just like anything else, you must practice to be good at whatever you choose to do. Elvis at first, was not good, but he got better, but then the roles got worse.Roy should have studied first before going before the camera.Granted, he would not have been a matinée idol, but who knows what could have happened if he would have continued with acting.Most big name actors started out in bad movies and acted badly, but as time went on, they learned their craft and some went on to win Oscars.One of the first roles that Clint Eastwood had was a lab assistant in "The Revenge Of The Creature", and you know what happened in his career.One of the biggest problems with "The Fastest Guitar Alive" is that it should not have been trying to be a musical.It just didn't work and the movie seemed to have too many things going on. But don't blame the actors for a bad script, they just made the mistake of being in the movie.And don't be too hard on Roy. He was new to movie making and didn't have anyone to guide him. He gave it a shot and we have to give him credit for that.

Hi, Everyone, Roy Orbison appears to be a nice guy in this movie. So does Sammy Jackson. The script is there, but it is not great. There is a nice plot line that could have been developed in a serious way. Political correctness got in the way and Roy and Sammy seem to be too worried about seeing to it the money in question here gets to almost anyone but themselves.

Sammy started his career as a model during the heydey of the Athletic Model Guild and then became an actor in the TV series, No Time For Sargeants. He was also in Night of the Grizzly which is a pretty bad movie.

Roy might have done a good job if they had the right script for him. His songs are OK and well arranged. Iron Eyes Cody gets a few laughs along with Ben Lessy. Ben Cooper was a big star in the mid 1950s and here he does an excellent job being a bad guy.

Watch for Sam The Sham. He had the big hit in 1965 of "Wooly Bully." I would like to recommend something similar in case you like this. I cannot think of anything similar. A funnier Western would be Blazing Saddles.

Tom Willett

Singing guitar-slinger Roy Orbison (as Johnny Banner) and hunky sidekick Sammy Jackson (as Steve Menlo) battle more Indians than Union soldiers as they work "undercover" for President Jefferson Davis and the Confederacy. When the Civil War ends, a booty of gold they stole from the USA for the CSA makes Mr. Orbison and his pal WANTED men. They are also desired, but for kissing instead of killing, by pretty sisters Maggie Pierce and Joan Freeman (as Flo and Sue Chestnut).

Producer Sam Katzman, who did "Kissin' Cousins" (1964) and "Harum Scarum" (1965) with Elvis, probably wanted Presley for this picture. After Colonel Parker declined, it might have been offered to Ricky Nelson. Father Ozzie would never agree to a film without complete production control, so that wouldn't have gone anywhere. So, what about Roy Orbison? He had the same sort of record success, and was owed a shot at movie stardom as part of his manager's deal with MGM's record subsidiary.

Orbison received millions from the package, which moved him from Monument to MGM records. The deal turned out to be a disaster, which is reflected in this film. Even the hit records stopped. The best "The Fastest Guitar Alive" song showing was "Pistolero" appearing on the B-side of a minor "Top 100" hit - which turned out to be the last Orbison appearance on the record charts until the 1980s. To make matters worse, Orbison had to deal with some personal tragedies. Roy was better than this.

** The Fastest Guitar Alive (9/1/67) Michael D. Moore ~ Roy Orbison, Sammy Jackson, Joan Freeman, Maggie Pierce

I know people, this movie is as bad as it gets. I'm was a huge Roy fan but surely when he looked at the days shoot, he had to cringe at his performance. Roy was never one to win a beauty contest and his acting, unlike his beautiful voice, was terrible. Out of respect for Roy, I have tried to watch the movie on three different occasions and each time I switched to Family Guy. Rest In Peace Roy, you were a great singer.

Man, it pains me but this is a bad Elvis movie, even by the Colonel's standards, it's the whole single premise of the story, of the fastest guitar alive. No it's not a spoiler it's in the movie title.

The music is so so but still, it's worth a watch to see a young Roy Orbison, that wonderful unappreciated voice is there.

RIP County boy........ The world misses that three-octave glass-shattering falsetto range.

Mercy.....

No doubt there were even worse first/last starring roles for music stars, but with his pompadour and not-exactly-Ricky-Nelson looks, Orbison is pretty silly as a chick magnet of the Old West. Plus, his wooden acting (though again, we've all seen worse) makes the absolutely mediocre supporting cast of professional actors look stellar, simply because they're photogenic and confident onscreen.

That said, "Fastest Guitar" is a very mixed bag that nonetheless at least tries for something a little different from the usual Elvis-type vehicle for girls, girls, girls and bad songs. It does have girls (the protagonists travel with a caravan of saloon dancers), and bad songs (hoo man, that "Snuggle Like a Buggle in a Ruggle" number is really the pits), but there's an attempt at an actual plot. What's more, that plot involves Confederate espionage in California towards the end of the Civil War. Of course, the intrigue is pedestrian and the comedy (mostly involving some red-face "Injun" stereotypes) is lame. But the movie has the benefit of being produced by MGM at a time when the studio still had (albeit barely) the resources of a big studio, so despite definitely being a "B," it's slickly produced and decently paced, the dancers can actually dance (if only they had good choreography), and so forth. The TV-veteran director does an uninspired but capable job. The result isn't exactly boring, but it's innocuous in pretty much exactly the way a dead-average episode of "Petticoat Junction" is.

This isn't a good movie, but it's not so bad as to be an unintentional laugh riot--which in a way is unfortunate, because that might have at least made it memorable. It's just an innocuous little product with the novelty of starring a great singer who clearly had no business acting. And one suspects he knew it.

I only watched because Roy is in it. Bless his heart, but he tried. Cheesy funny, I even changed my rating from a 3 to a 4 just because the bad jokes tickled me

I LOVE Roy Orbison! I saw him perform live on four different occasions and I own tons of his records, tapes, CD's and this movie. He was not handsome enough to become a matinée idol like Elvis, but he was the GREATEST singer ever, even Elvis said so! This movie is a light hearted comedy with singing. A few of the songs are not so great by Roy's standards, but most are good and a few are really good e.g. "Pistolero" and "Roll On Mighty River". I especially love the the title song, "The Fastest Guitar Alive". The plot of the movie is not that bad. Has anybody besides me noticed the similarity between this movie and the Errol Flynn/Randolph Scott western "Virginia City"? I love that movie and those two actors too. Roy's movie was not looking for critical acclaim. It was just a good "B" flick, certainly better than a thousand other grade "B" westerns out there. It had some very funny scenes and it was good clean fun. You could watch it with your children and not have to worry about sex and violence. Roy might have become a better actor if he had made a few more movies, but since this is his only movie and if you are a true Roy Orbison fan, treasure it!

I first heard of this movie via the final song on the LP, "There Won't Be Many Coming Home". Outstanding anti-war number, from the age of the anti-war protest song. When I tried to find a copy, all the record dealers told me it was very difficult to locate. A friend who worked at a radio station eventually sold me the station's used promo copy. It would be a few years before I actually saw the movie. A forgetable, but not "Plan 9" bad film. My favorite song was not actually in the movie. TWBMCH is not a funny song. MGM would later release a lot of its old material on both vinyl and CD, so now I have new copies. I've heard that TWBMCH was in the movie "Hateful 8". The youtube video version is sped up and lacks the majesty of the original. I've not see H8 and don't plan to.

I saw this on TV many moons ago as a teen & I was mesmerized by Roy Orbison's "out of this world" singing voice. I just watched it again last night on You Tube. And I thought he did a good acting job for his first & last movie. It was quite a demanding role for Roy as Johnny Banner I liked when early on his character goes in disguise wearing a white hair wig & beard & a top hat he was deep in his acting & not a sign of Roy Orbison. He had a natural acting ability & had he made more movies he could've emerged as an actor of credible ability.

I read there were plans for Roy to do five pictures but the idea was scrapped as this flick was a flop at the box office. Too bad because this could've began a new career for Roy as the hit records ended after he left Monument. I wasn't surprised one bit Elvis Presley was the first choice & turned it down. It was right up his alley. If any rock n roll artist gave Elvis competition & a run for his money it was the legendary Roy Orbison. He clearly influenced Elvis' operatic singing style in his later period.

I liked the novelty of Roy's guitar which was a gun & of all the songs he sings the best ones I think were "Pistolero". "River" & "Medicine Man" The movie has a plot & story it's an entertaining fun film & must see for Roy Orbison fans.

The star of this film is one of the least physically attractive musicians in the history of rock and roll, with little-to-no previous acting experience, and no on-screen personality or charisma at all.. And the "gimmick" is that he has a rifle built into his guitar, and threatens the bad guys with it. If it were in black and white, I would swear that this was an Ed Wood film. This movie killed Roy Orbison's film career and hopefully ended several others as well. Having said that, I gave it two stars instead of one, because if you're in the mood for 90 minutes of a totally mindless bad movie, this would fit the bill.

As a fan of Roy Orbison's music I can only suggest you view this film with an open mind. Roy was a great singer, was a horrible actor and shouldn't be what he isn't. The music is sub-standard and the idea that Roy could be a matinee idol is beyond his scope in this piece of tripe. It's been said that this vehicle was to be an "Elvis movie" ... it isn't even that good. The plot is thin, if you consider this a plot! The acting slightly above that of a simple children's television show calibre, the directing is laughable and any attempt at humour doesn't reach heights attained by James Arness! Video tapes and DVDs on this release should last in your library for quite a few years, you won't watch it but the once! Remember Roy Orbison for his music: positive, creative and unique!

Roy Orbison had one of the sexiest singing voices ever, however his speaking voice made him sound like a nerd. He also looked like a nerd, especially without his trademark dark sunglasses; and since this movie takes place before sunglasses were invented that was not an option. Instead he was heavily made up, with black hair dye (or perhaps a wig), and artificial painted-on eyebrows, so he looks like a mannequin from a wax museum. His acting skills are actually not terrible, but it's hard to play a convincing hero when you look and sound so dorky.

The movie itself is... well, not good. He flips a switch on his guitar that turns it into a gun, and that's the only novel or exciting thing there is. The comedy bits with the Indians are of course totally racist by today's standards, but even at the time they must have seen stale and unfunny. Also bad by today's standards is that Roy and his friends are working for the Confederate Army. The weirdest part of the plot is that when they are told that the war is now over and the South has lost, their reaction is "oh well, so much for that." A few minutes earlier they were willing to risk their lives for the cause of good old Dixie and the plantation system of slavery, and the next minute they're ready to call it a loss and just move on.

The only good thing about the movie is the music. Roy Orbison and Bill Dees wrote a bunch of songs for the movie and they range from pretty good to truly excellent. As soon as Roy starts singing (or lip synching to his recordings) he is no longer a nerd. He is transformed into a highly charismatic, irresistibly smooth, super cool dude. It's a good thing we have this film, flawed as it is, to preserve his legacy as a unique and brilliant singing star.

Very very bad war-comedy-drama. Lame central plot, with random, farcical sub-plots. Quite silly.

I assume this movie was an attempt to launch a Roy Orbison acting career, to emulate Elvis, but it fails miserably. His performance is very unconvincing. Even his music - written especially for the movie, I assume - seems flat, especially by his usually high standards.

Avoid.