Plot

Christian must operate on a drummer who requests earlobe reconstruction after being dropped from his punk band.

In the four months since barely surviving the homicidal psychotic Colleen Rose's attack, Sean has been rendered an angry and frustrated paraplegic, teaching plastic surgery classes to students at UCLA, one of whom, an bright and ambitious trust fund case, named Raj Paresh, begins to brown-nose Sean and his methods. Christian in the meantime has taken over the practice doing all the surgeries, one of which involves a drummer named Ronnie Chase who needs earlobe reconstruction after his punk band drops him. But Christian soon becomes angry and bitter himself when he and Liz learn that he has a developed breast cancer that usually strikes only women. Also, Matt tells Sean that he has enrolled at Santa Monica College taking pre-med courses to follow in his father's footsteps.—Anonymous

Previously on "Nip/Tuck:" Christian discovers he has a daughter; Annie is hurt in a car accident; and Sean is stabbed in the back (literally) by uber-creepy Colleen. That's a lot of plot points to stitch up, so let's get started.

We start with the gory details of Sean's stabbing. Colleen, her face hidden behind bandages, sneaks into the clinic where the good father cares for his injured daughter. She grabs the biggest knife she can find, sneaks up behind Sean and starts hacking like Jason Voorhees. Spitting blood, the doc falls to the floor. Naturally, Colleen is immediately sorry and drags Sean into the hallway. "It's gonna be alright!" she says. "I'm going to take care of you now!" Yeah right.

Christian rushes into the room to find Annie flat-lining and Sean missing. He stabilizes the girl and then follows the trail of blood to a locked supply closet. Inside, Colleen whispers crazy, sweet nothings. With his last bit of strength, Sean grabs his attacker's knife and sticks her like a roast. Just then, Christian kicks down the door to find the dead woman and his dying friend. He SCREAMS for help as we fade to black.

Not bad for the first 11 minutes.

Back to present day, a pair of elevator doors open to reveal Sean in a wheelchair. The poor guy doesn't look too happy. Liz, meanwhile, discusses a breast reduction and she wants Sean to do it. "I'm teaching all day, you do it," he says to Christian. And then: "I am not ready to operate!" A sore subject, indeed. Sean rolls out, leaving Christian and Liz looking almost as forlorn as their friend.

Sometime later, Christian examines Liz's breasts. They exchange some playful, slightly awkward banter before the doctor's tone becomes deadly serious. "This feels like a lump," Christian says. One mammogram later, we discover the not-so-awful truth: not cancer. Christian then mentions that he also has a bump -- probably from weight lifting. One mammogram later, we discover the awful truth: cancer. But is it malignant and invasive? "I don't have good news, Dr. Troy," the examining doctor says.

Things aren't going much better for Sean, who struggles through therapy with the help of Matt. The young man has good news: He has enrolled in college. "I think I want to try the pre-med thing," Matt says. Sean is overjoyed. Alas, the good mood doesn't last. Christian enters and confesses that he has "stage two breast cancer."

The two head for the bar, natch. "You're going to beat it," Sean says. Christian shoots back: "I went to med school, I know what stage two means." The former then tells the latter about a vision he had in which Christian was still alive. "We were still together," he says. "Older, but we got to see our kids grow up." It's a touching moment between the two longtime friends.

Speaking of touching, a very attractive blonde approaches and asks if the men "need anything." Christian raises his eyebrows in a suggestive manner. Just then, he notices a similarly attractive brunette in a nearby booth. "Can I buy you a drink?" Christian says. "I just found out I have breast cancer." What a line.

But it works. Seconds later, the foursome is stumbling back into Sean's apartment. Seconds after that, the women are stripping down and dancing suggestively. Seconds after that, sex. Sean might not be able to walk at the moment, but he can apparently perform other acts quite proficiently. Christian does not fare as well, giving his girl an impromptu breast exam. "You can't be too careful -- especially at your age," he quips. The woman leaves in a huff. Nice.

The next morning, Christian visits Liz and Wilber. "Wilber is going to need some stability in his life if something happens to me," he tells the anesthesiologist. "I want you to raise him." Liz agrees, but notes that she thinks Christian will be "around for another 50 years." On the other hand, she understands that he should get his "affairs in order." Talked about mixed messages.

Cut to the clinic, where Christian is about to undergo surgery. The team jokes but it's clear everyone is terribly worried. We then cut to Sean attending calling hours for Colleen Rose. He rolls up to the coffin only to find his own body. A dream. Colleen appears behind him, preaching the joys of death. "You can catch up on your rest," she says. Sean awakens in a cold sweat ... and walks into the bathroom. No more chair.

Christian, meanwhile, removes the gauze around his chest. He stares at the huge scar on his left pectoral and begins crying. It's going to be a long season.