- Man in the Magic Mirror: Oh, good, she's not here. I mean, my former employer... the Wicked Queen in Snow White, you know - "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?" Yecch.
- Man in the Magic Mirror: It's fifty years since I first appeared on the silver screen. Back then, "rock" had a different meaning. We'd beware of rocks, especially if they were rolling.
- Man in the Magic Mirror: Tonight, we'll share some slightly scary monster hits from the dungeons of Disney. Delicious little things that go BUMP in the night.
- [laughs]
- Hazel the Witch: Double, double, toil and trouble. Fire burn and cauldron bubble. Let's mix up a fright-night brew with great cartoons and rock stars too. We call that magical potion DTV. Rhythm and Blues, Pop and Soul, and a lock of hair from Billy Joel!
- Hazel the Witch: My favorite night is once a year, when spirits come from far and near to scare and terrify... any por soul who happens by. I'd never been scared, never known fright, 'til I went trick-or-treating one Halloween night.
- Man in the Magic Mirror: Pure fear can be so exhilarating. It sometimes even makes me feel like dancing, but - I can't. Because, as the song goes, I ain't got no body.
- Man in the Magic Mirror: I've been hanging around for centuries, so I've had plenty of time for reflection of the most interesting of subjects: villains. Do you realice that without evil there is no good, and without villains there wouldn't be heroes? Believe me, I'm an expert. Being a looking-glass, I get to watch all kinds of people so don't be surprised if the next time you look into a mirror, somebody's watching you.
- Hazel the Witch: Curses, I hate it when the good guys always win. They get all the glory, much to my chagrín.
- Man in the Magic Mirror: [of The Legend of Sleepy Hollow] Is this story real, or mere fantasy?... I'll never tell. But that pie was delicious!
- Man in the Magic Mirror: When it comes to scheming, plotting, and revenge, heck hath no fury like a woman scorned and I should know. Used to work for one of the unfairest of all.
- Man in the Magic Mirror: She loved to dabble in her lab and consult her cookbook of spells and curses. Remember her motto - bitter living through chemistry?
- Man in the Magic Mirror: [Medusa shoots him] Hey, wait a minute, what's going on here! I'm on *your* side! Hoh! This hosting job can be a danerous experience.
- Man in the Magic Mirror: You know what strikes me as you humans' greatest weakness? Superstitions. I mean, does anyone honestly believe that nonsense about a black cat bringing bad luck, or, that thirteen at dinner causes indigestion? It's so ridiculous. In fact, just the other day -
- [a fissure etches its way onto his glass]
- Man in the Magic Mirror: Who did that? Who cracked my mirror? Oh, curses, don't you know that's seven years' bad luck? For you!
- Man in the Magic Mirror: If I had beautiful dreams like Mickey, I'd go back to sleep too. Of course, I must admit I personally perfer nightmares, but - don't be alarmed.