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Barclayandrew
Reviews
Joyride (1997)
No Joy
After having watched Benicio Del Toro in some brilliant and engrossing roles, i decided id give 'Joyride' a watch. Toby Maguire isn't one of my favourite actors, and I've often found him to be a fairly boring, and in the hands of a movie such as this, Maguire is stretched far beyond his limits. The story is laughable for all the wrong reasons, and the movie plods on and on, without many scenes of any real depth. Del Toro is also slacking, mostly mumbling his way through the terrible script. As if all this wasn't bad enough, the movies production and soundtrack kill what little merit 'Joyride' had. I've tried to think of some good points to raise, but upon reflection, there are non.
3/10
Killers (1996)
Could've been so much better ...
I must admit i wasn't expecting much from 'The Killer's', even having read the claims on the UK front cover that it's of the same ilk as 'Natural Born Killers'. The script and acting range from poor, to dismal, to unbearable. The brother's relationship is far from clear, and what vague story line there is, is so badly pieced together, that often times in the movie your sure you've missed something, you cling on in the hope that a clever twist of plot will ensue, but in fact it all falls apart in quite spectacular fashion. The basis of a cult movie are there, but sadly unrealised, id miss this if you possibly can.
2/10
Nighthawks (1981)
Nearly made its point
'Nighthawkes' deals with the complex and destructive subject of terrorism, i subject now closer to many peoples hearts than it was when this movie was made. The main players are stallone as 'Det Sgt Deke Dasilva' and his partner 'Det Sgt Matthew Fox', played by Billy Dee Williams. They are up against 'Wolfgar',played perfectly by Rutger Hauer, a free lance terrorist intent on inflicting as much damage as he can on the west.
Whilst the movie does show just how evil and dangerous 'Wolfgar' is, it falls into the trap of good Vs Bad, and pays no attention as to why men like 'Wolfgar' exist. Being a Stallone vehicle 'Nighthawkes' isn't allowed to fully explain itself, and before we know it the film collapses into a cat and mouse chase between Stallone and 'Wolfgar'. Rutger Hauer has said he felt the movie failed to realise its potential, and on that i totally agree with him.
That said, 'Nighthawkes' is watchable if only for Hauers ice cold portrayal of 'Wolfgar'. If its 90 minutes of fairly easy to digest action, this movie may well be for you, if your looking for something more substantial you'll be left unrewarded by 'Nighthawkes'.
Near Dark (1987)
Near Boredom
After reading all the positive reviews of 'Near Dark', i thought id check it out. I wasn't expecting anything like the films its been linked to (aka 'Lost boys'), i was hoping for it to live up to the hype in at least some small way. The story line is really bare bones stuff, guy meets girl, girl bites guy, guy becomes a vampire. Pretty standard Vampire movie criteria, done many times before and since, with a few variations thrown in here and there.
Whilst watching 'Near Dark' i couldn't say i was unhappy with the acting, all concerned put in good performances. I noticed a similar pattern weaving into the story line as takes place in 'Interview with a vampire', in that our main hero is fighting his conversion into the undead, yet at the same time cannot help but give in to his nocturnal hunger.
This is where i feel the movie falls down, since it subscribes to the long held legend that vampires cannot wander around during daylight, most of the film takes place at night, as does 'Interview with a vampire' made a few years later. The problem being is that the latter film was able to furnish the vampires nocturnal hunting missions with wonderful backdrops and eye catching visuals, where as 'Near Dark' only offers the viewer dreary motels, dark highways and unlit barns.
Since the subject matter of killing people to drink their blood is a dark enough concept, the film really needed to be balanced out with either some witty in jokes, or stunning night scenery, which 'Near Dark' has neither of. As i said earlier, the acting is good as can be expected, most notably the ever reliable Bill Paxton, but the constant darkness and repetitive nature of the script simply bored me. A good opportunity wasted. 5/10
A Breed Apart (1984)
Hauers worst 80s movie
I was expecting much more than this movie delivered, the actors involved have all given some great performances, but none of them seemed remotely connected to this story line. Hauer, who'd just made the classic 'Osterman Weekend' plays a former soldier, dedicated to looking after his own private island, and its bird population. Donald Pleasence is an avid collector of rare birds eggs and hires Powers Boothe to recover some extremely rare eggs from Hauers island.
Hauer gets himself in a local dispute with some hunters killing birds on his land, and so ensues a messy, clumsy war between him and the hunters. Add to this Powers Boothe arrival and the film starts to fall flat on its face. The acting is very average, and the films ultimate aim at pointing out the importance of nature is lost amongst the movies detracting subplots.
The direction and production isn't up to scratch, only adding the the films failure. Although an avid fan of hauers work, id recommend you don't waste your time on 'A Breed Apart'.
Animal Factory (2000)
Highly Recommended
Although the DVD cover draws attention to another great prison movie (The ShawShank Redemtion), 'Animal Factory' is actually closer in style and content the equally good 'Midnight Express'. Without revealing the plot, Edward Furlong finds himself in deep trouble and is sent to prison for what emerges to be longer than his crime should permit. Here he meets and is befriended by Willem Defoe's character, the prison gang leader of sorts. Furlong, young, alone and vulnerable finds himself taken under the wing of Defoe, which amongst other benefits's, offers him some security against buggery. All the acting is first class, and the direction is snappy enough to keep the viewer entertained until the films climax. Keep a look out for Mickey Rourke's fantastic cameo, had he been given more screen time he would have stolen the show. A must see.
Wilder (2000)
Too much information
Considering the cast, and the big corporation against the people story line, the makings of a decent movie were all there. Pam Grier is investigating a series of murder's and links Rutger Huauers character to them, as he's connected to one of them by way of a jilted and bitter romance.
He also happened to give her professional advice (He's a Dr) that turned out to be less than life saving. His best friend also works for a big chemical company edging for promotion working within 'the womens medical' dept. All this coupled with the fact that a man resembling Hauer was seen leaving the crime scene.
Pam visits the good Dr to see if she can jog his memory and the two end up getting along very well. Its at this point everything starts to fall apart, the film tries to be too complicated, and Griers script requires her to spell everything out for the viewer, but instead of helping coast the story line along, her role in fact stilts the films proceedings, making everything seem slow and boring.
Hauer as usual, plays his part perfectly well, but doesn't have the necessary bulk to his role to really do anything other than plod along with the whole dull affair. Basically, the script strives too far into what really should have been quite a simple, enjoyable film. If your the kind of person intent on seeing this because your obsessed by seeing everything ever filmed by Grier or Hauer (and you know who you are)then you'll be mildly disappointed, everyone else steer well clear of 'Wilder'.
The Keeper (2004)
The Keeper wont keep you entertained
The only reason to watch this badly written movie would be if you were a fan of either Helen Shaver (a great actress) or the legendary Dennis Hopper. If you desire to see these two together in a film, choose 'The Ostetrman Weekend', which is by far the better film. The basic story line is the prisoner wanting to escape the jailer. (similer to the much better 'Misery')
Without going into too much detail so as not to spoil the plot (well, what plot there is), lets just say this is best avoided. There are millions of films out there to spend 90 minutes on, don't make it this one.
La leggenda del santo bevitore (1988)
Amazing acting
The basic story line is a simple one, a street drinker (played by Hauer) is given $200 which he must repay to the saint chosen by the charitable old man who loaned him the money, as soon as he's able to do so, at his local church. At every opportunity Hauer gets to repay his debt, something unforeseen occurs and prevents him from paying his debt. Although the movie doesn't have wide spread appeal, its worth watching, if only for the superb direction and Hauers haunting performance, which may well be the finest of his career to date.
The period of the films setting is uncertain, lending it a strange atmosphere, adding to Hauers hypnotic portrayal. Its charm and fine acting make 'Legend of the holy drinker' well worth seeking out.
F.T.W. (1994)
The First Big Mistake
Mickey Rourke had been offered the part of Butch in the hugely successful 'Pulp Fiction'. He declined the role and opted to star in 'The Last Ride' (Aka 'F.T.W'). The fact he had an input in the writing may have had much to do with the decision, but in retrospect it was a bad move. Had Rourke taken the role offered to him in 'Pulp Fiction' his status as a Hollywood king of cool may have been restored.(It had already been badly damaged by previous efforts such as 'Prayer for the dying','Wild Orchid', and the dreadful 'Harley Davidson & the Malaboro Man')
That he did not take such a high profile role in the wake of these box office disasters showed a worrying lack of quality control from such a gifted actor. 'The last ride' was a faltering love story (also staring Lori Singer)about an out of luck former Rodeo rider and a socially damaged girl. The whole story has been done before, with bigger budgets and better casts. Singers character ends up returning to the only kind of life she knows after meeting Frank T. Wells, and ends up on the run.
Rourke plays the 'Wells' character with the usual subtle charisma he that made him famous in the 80s, but the supporting cast just isn't up to the job. Singer's character is pursued by the cops and this sets of the inevitable chain of events that become the movies climax. Whilst i wont reveal the actual ending I'm sure you can guess. Avoid it, especially if your a Rourke fan, this was his first big mistake.
Bearskin: An Urban Fairytale (1989)
Bear the skin of your teeth
Tom Waits is a very talented songwriter. He is perhaps up there with the top five American songwriters of the past thirty years. He is also a fine actor, those of you having watched movies like 'Down by law' and 'Short Cuts' will not doubt agree. He rarely if ever puts a foot wrong in his main chosen arena of the arts, music.
Apart from a few badly judged moves, the same can be said of his film work. 'Bearskin' is I'm afraid, very much one of those 'badly judged moves'. It is in fact a major' foot wrong'. The blame however doesn't lie with Waits performance, its more than acceptable, but the script is dire, the supporting cast are uninteresting, and the camera work is stiff.
The story is quite unbelievalbe, and no matter how well Waits represents the scripts better intentions, this film goes nowhere. I've long hoped Waits would get the chance to show off his acting in larger more commercial roles, something he hasn't really done yet. Sure, he's appeared in cameo form in some big Hollywood efforts, but his abilities deserve so much more. Much much more than 'Bearskin'.
Shergar (1999)
One horse race to nowhere
When recounting these events that took place some years ago, (hard to believe this actually happened)i thought, well, there is a basis for an interesting story here. Many secrets were never uncovered, the horse never found, the main conspirators never captured etc.
However, this film seems to be distracted by character study, and very little attention payed to the plot. Some other questions are raised though, like why on earth would Mickey Rourke be in this film? Its good to see rourkes career has taken off again, but he must cringe at the mention of this rubbish.
If the subject matter interests you, do an internet search on the topic, you'll be more educated and dare i say more entertained. Avoid this.
Straight Time (1978)
A touch of class
In an age when crime cinema is now commonly packaged with quirky camera angles, non stop car chase's, massive explosions, and wise cracking leading men/women, 'Srtaight Time' may on the surface seem dreadfully dated. Films such as 'Pulp Fiction' may have done much to convey the modern day crime flick with its polished production and multi-million dollar budgets as the norm, but the building blocks to such movies can be surprisingly rewarding. One such building block is 'Striaght Time', based on Edward Bunkers brilliant novel. Set in seventies America it finds Dustin Hoffman portraying 'Max Dembo', a career criminal attempting to lead a lawful existence, after being released from a five year sentence for armed robbery. To help him do this his parole officer, Earl Davis, played by the ever reliable M. Emmet Walsh, sets about instructing Dembo of his strict conditions, which include finding accommodation and a job 'by the end of the week'. In an attempt to meet these conditions Dembo goes to a job agency and gets himself a job at the national can company, a boring mundane career path, but lawful non the less. During this time he meets his love interest played by a young Therisa Russel (whom dembo met at the job agency) and hooks up with former criminal friend played by Gary Busey. Busy drops by Dembo's bedsit and shoots up heroin, which breaks Dembo's parole conditions. The oppressive Earl Davis visits Dembo's place unannounced when Dembo's at work and discovers the foil wrap, which is enough for him to have dembo locked up for drug tests. This is the moment when Hoffan's character's fate is sealed as he sees no justice and no hope. One thing leads to another and before long he's arranging to rob card games and hold up banks. The climax is quite unlike most movies of its ilk, as there is no riding off into the sunset with the girl, no happy conclusion, and commendably, no preachy moral undercurrent. Its simply a portrayal of a man out of step with society, at odds with himself and those closest to him. Its without doubt one of Hoffmans finest performance's, and should be on the watch list of any crime film fan. With major contributions from the supporting cast, and subtle direction, 'Striaght Time' is certainly an underrated classic.
The Search for One-eye Jimmy (1994)
Not too clever
Badly acted, poorly shot, and no story line. Not even the various cameo's could save this dire film. Whilst it does contain a few funny moments ( most notably L.Jackson's appearance), it really is not worth the time it takes to sit through. It did strike me that perhaps it was shot during the process of making another movie, as a kind of side project,but even that would not excuse the rubbish results. I'm not usually so harsh but would hate anyone to have to sit through even ten minutes of this movie. However, to back up my claims, I know that most of the people who ignore my warning's will wish they hadn't after the first ten minutes of this nonsense.
Cruising (1980)
Cruising for a let down?
Normally Al Pachino invests 100% into his acting, whatever the subject matter, Pachino is likely to deliver. However, 'Cruising' is the exception, and not by any half measure's either. The story line revolves around a killer who is targeting gay men, and Pachino plays the cop assigned to track the murderer down, whilst questioning his own sexuality. The plot has so much potential but is so far off the mark it's frankly awfull. The supporting cast is poor, to the point this movie is worse than the worst selection of made for t.v productions ive had the miss-fortune to have sat through. If, like me, you admire Pachino's acting, then i wouldnt recommend this to you, even for die hard fan's this is best left alone.
Out in Fifty (1999)
Heading for cult status
Here we have the basic formula for a revenge story. Mickey Rourke stars as cop whose wife is accidentally killed one evening whilst entertaining a strange young man. He then starts stalking the convict on his release.....which leads to Rourke's lust for revenge. Had the story been this straight forward on screen then it surely would've bored me to tears, but the films eccentric characters and the complex relationships within the film carry it completely. Balthazar Getty makes a cameo as a whacked out pimp/motel owner Overall well worth a look.
It's unlikely you'll see Rourke in a low budget movie again, since his career has taken off again (finally), so check this out if your a fan.
Point Blank (1998)
Die hard at point blank range
Well, this isnt so much of a B-movie version of Die Hard, but a tongue in cheek parody of that whole action movie genre, and an achingly funny one at that. It's all here, slow motion fight scenes, big explosion's, and the slightly insane crime boss. Mickey Rourke grunts his way through the tough guy script with a bone dry delivery that make's you certain he's talking this whole thing seriously. Everything's over the top, the acting, the stunts, and Bruce Lee like battle's, an instant underground classic.
Troll (1986)
Great fun
One of the 80s better B-movie horror flicks (another notable inclusion would be 'The Vagrant'),The Trolls subject matter is very simple, the little guy goes around sticking people with his magic ring that has a needle on it, when pricked the victim slowly turns to plant life (a subject covered in the dementedly fun 'The Creepshow', and slowly he attempts to turn an entire housing block into his own evil land, full of goblins and monsters. Clearly not for the movie fan looking for a serious horror flick ,'The Troll' is silly but enjoyable.That said, do avoid the sequel as it doesn't contain the charm of this little gem, and for some reason is much more widely available, which is a pity, as the original deserves a full DVD release.