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11-11-11 (2011)
The Decline of Bousman
First off, I am a huge horror movie fan, I really appreciate a good scare or bizarre movie. This movie however falls flat on its face for most of its short running time.
I expected more from this director, I love the SAW series and Repo was pretty entertaining as well. Mothers Day was where the wheels began to fall off and unfortunately this movie doesn't put things back on track.
The editing in this movie is very confusing and often at times you will wonder exactly what the purpose of fast cuts are and why the director seemed in a rush to get everything done.
The acting was average at best and the setting of Spain adds nothing to the movie at all. They should have gone for a much darker vibe than they did and crafted something really spooky or something that felt evil. I was never scared in this movie at all which is a shame as there was a scene early on in the hospital that could have been capitalized upon.
The demons themselves didn't frighten me at all and I feel that Darren wasted a lot of potential on this movie. The demons are shown fully and it doesn't create chills, they look like cheap knockoffs from the Resident Evil 4 game (the zombies with crossbows). It would have been better to keep us in the dark as to their appearance.
I could go on and on about how average this movie is, but really there is no need. Go watch something decent like 'Ills' 'Martyrs' 'Insidous' etc and don't waste time on this one.
One good thing I liked though was the twist in the movie, I really didn't see that coming at all. Let's hope that Darren's next movie is better than this one!
The Haunted World of El Superbeasto (2009)
The WORST thing I have ever seen
Rob, you should stop directing now. House of 1000 corpses was good, Devils Rejects was amazing but after that the quality of your movies drastically went downhill.
This was supposed to be a comedy, I didn't laugh once during the entire movie. There was no real plot,just a bunch of random scenes strung together with some nudity and profanity thrown in.
Im so sick of you referencing or ripping off scenes from other movies too. The part based on 'Carrie' in this movie shows that you can't think of your own ideas, it's just lazy.
I respect your music and enjoy it, so please for all that is good in the film industry, stop making movies and just go back to music!
Azumi (2003)
Saa....
I expected more from this movie. I knew it was going to be an action movie but it just never really worked that well. The first half I enjoyed...but as soon as the story moved onto the other characters except for Azumi was when I felt that the movie lost its focus. Also I know its based on a manga but how can someone survive thats been stabbed so many times whilst his friend dies from a few slashes? I love Uteo Aya in this. Shes very pretty and her acting was good. The settings were beautiful and the fight scenes were alright but it was lacking something and I can't quite put my finger on what it was.
If you have time to spare watch it and make your own judgement but I felt it was pretty average.
Masters of Horror: Imprint (2006)
It will get under your skin
This is definitely not for the faint of heart....even I had trouble watching this and Audition is my favourite film period. Miike is one of the only directors that I know of that can make even the most horrific scenes compelling to watch. He also has a penchant for the bizarre and far out this is one strange twisted tale he weaves with only the hour he is given.
There are a couple of points that I would like to raise...the acting is pretty average especially Billy Drago's lackluster performance and the film takes around 30 minutes to really get going.
However from that point onwards this is vintage Miike, sick, twisted, perverse, violent, extreme. There are those who appreciate his work and are addicted to it and those that can't handle it at all. I happen to be addicted to his works and look forward to many more squirm inducing and weird moments to come.
Miike truly is THE Master Of Horror! (Couldn't resist lol)
Gokudô kyôfu dai-gekijô: Gozu (2003)
Disturbing
I don't mean in a conventional way...not at all...this is Miike folks and nothing is ever as it seems. You will never think of Milk, Cows or birth again in the same way ever.
The first 20 minutes or so are extremely funny...I mean the guy is obviously insane...thinking such a little dog belongs to the Yakuza. After he gets separated from his brother...this is where things go so far into the weird scale that Im still digesting (OK not the best choice of words...perhaps processing...OK forget it...digesting it is) exactly what I watched and it's been 2 days since some of the scenes of this film have been seared into my brain.
If you can handle perverse things and have seen other Miike films...watch this...its funny, sick, shocking all at the same time.
I find it strange that the very last image of the film was the one thing that disturbed me the most...I mean it's not even sick...it's an everyday thing people do the world over...but in the context of this film it takes on a darker meaning.
Tôkyô zankoku keisatsu (2008)
Well....
I thought I would like this movie,it had everything that I was expecting and more but really after watching it I was a bit like...huh? The movie isn't bad, it isn't good, it's kind of just there, if you want to see bucket loads of gore and really bizarre creature people then by all means watch. I just wasn't grossed out by much of the movie, the uh club part was kinda sick though. I guess I was just expecting a bit more from this movie and it didn't deliver everything that I thought it would with such a high score on this website.
Gore fans will probably like it but in comparison to other Japanese horror or splatter films such as Koroshiya 1, it just didn't deliver.
Seven Pounds (2008)
Incredible
This film blew me away. The acting was superb, the story was heart wrenching and I truly believed in the characters. Some of you may say that this film is just another in a list of movies such as Pay It Forward.
This is a fallacy. This film here grabbed me from the start and will stay with me for weeks. It's a very powerful film and Will Smith and the rest of the cast deserve our applause and respect for playing their roles so well. Credit to the scriptwriters and director for also allowing this film to exist, it was amazing.
A definite must see film and one worthy of nomination for awards.
9/10
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (2007)
I was up above it....
and now Im down in it. Look this movie is honestly pathetic. It has one of the most non cohesive story lines of any sequel I have ever seen. There are far too many fantasy elements as well. Jack Sparrow doesn't even appear until almost half way through the movie! The characters are not as funny this time around and everything seemed sloppily put together. It really was a boring movie as well. Please for all that is good, avoid this movie, it does nothing to further any character development and in my mind should never have been made.
The first two Pirate movies are fantastic, this one is so shockingly bad that I almost stopped watching after the first hour. It really is that boring and stupid.
AVOID
I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997)
I Know What You Did Last Summer....
It was a hot day and you didn't have much to do so you decided to sit down and see what the movie channels were offering. Whats this a flick about an urban legend? Count me in! So you grab your alcoholic beverage and sit down to watch for the next hour and a half a pointless and badly acted teen horror movie. Don't get me wrong, I love slashers but this one felt lacking in every department.
Awful acting, how many times do we need to hear Jennifer Love Hewitt scream? How many stereotypical characters can we fit into one film? This urban legend has been done to death already. I really recommend avoiding this one unless you really have some time to kill.
Overall a 3/10 is sufficient, trust me, I watched it yesterday and felt like I needed someone to give me my hour and a half back.
Death Race (2008)
An Insult To The Original
I was expecting this movie to be a decent action movie and thats all I got. It would have been better being named something else though. The original movie that it is based on is far better.
The thing that annoyed me with this movie was that there were a couple of decent kills but after that Hollywood once again went the route of the ridiculous by utilizing something not even in the race to take out the other drivers! Im sure you will feel cheated by this as well.
The original had humour, kills and was cheesy but action packed in the best way possible. It also focused on running over people rather than destroying your opponents which is exactly what this remake did.
If I could describe this film, I would say its like Twisted Metal, I found the weapons that were attached to the cars to be too overdone and no this movie didn't focus on humour or running over people. It lacked the factors that made the original a great watch.
I did like it when the cars got ready to race, an obvious homage to Carmageddon which incidentally is based on Death Race 2000 (1975) which is a much better movie than this remake.
The Hitcher (2007)
Unnecessary
The original was good and had some decent tension and point to the film. This was average. It's absurd how Hollywood keeps remaking movies. The acting in the film was average. The story was silly. The actual action was decent and the gore was good but overall the movie was pretty pointless. Sophia Bush was hot though, that was the one excellent thing the movie had. Using a NIN song was a good idea but 'Closer' does not fit in with an action scene! Hollywood please enough with the remakes already...I've had enough!
The main villain wasn't threatening at all. There was one scene in the movie made me jump but really do we expect cars or in this case a dodge ram to fall out of the sky? Oh there was one other decent thing about the movie....the scenery was gorgeous...but really we weren't watching this for that now were we?
Saw V (2008)
The Blood Well Is Running Out...
Well after 3 brilliant sequels, the series finally stumbles...I feel this is due to two reasons. A new director and the traps weren't traps this time, they were more like puzzles...I'll admit that the opening scene and last 2 'traps' were executed greatly (pun intended) but the others were so so.
The acting was spotty in places and there was way too many flashbacks...the story itself was interesting but the film just didn't possess the intensity of the first 4 films which was upsetting.
I must say though that the last 20 mins or so was very enjoyable and bloody...its just a pity the rest of the film wasn't so graphic.
I really think they should end it with VI. Really they should before they ruin the series for good.
If I could rank the films in order from best to worst, it would go like this
Saw IV Saw II Saw Saw III Saw V
The Strangers (2008)
Same Old Clichéd Hollywood Horror
Now I am a huge fan of horror and love the classics such as Halloween, A Nightmare On Elm Street, TCM etc but its becoming more obvious that Hollywood has lost its talent for delivering a good horror film.
Recent films I like that are Hollywood Horror are the SAW and Final Destination franchise. Don't get me wrong though, I love a good suspenseful story which is what made Joy Ride such a pleasure to watch.
This film on the other hand fails in all accounts at making a decent plot, with suspense. The premise of this movie is quite good but the film never takes off, left to wander about at such a slow pace that I thought it would never end. Whenever something intriguing might happen, it falls back on clichés. For example when I see one of the strangers being spoken to, I expect him to stay there, but no, the heroes look away and look back and the character is gone...so predicitable.
The acting was barely enjoyable either, Liv Tyler...what happened? The ending of the film was clichéd as well...I mean cmon...Iv'e seen that exact same thing so many times before! My main problem with the film though was its pacing....nothing suspenseful ever really happens and we don't spend enough screen time with the strangers for them to truly become a threat to us and the 'heroes' of the film.
I think I'll stick with watching Asian Horror such as Audition, Battlefield Baseball etc This film elicits a massive 'Meh' from me. You have been warned how average this film is...avoid at all costs...its nothing special...
Halloween (2007)
Was That The Boogeyman? Yes I Believe It Was
I don't know who the boogeyman is in this movie. Rob the director, Michael or the audience for having to put up with an inconsistent plot. Lets get one thing straight, I loved Corpses and Rejects but this re invisioning of a classic was lacking in a lot of areas. I really hated the first five minutes or so because of the inappropriate and childish sexual dialouge. After Michael kills his first victim I was hooked and horrified that Michael then proceeded to slaughter his family. That 20 minutes or so was the only scary part of the film due to the brutality of the killings.
Then we see Michael grown up and he loses all credibility as a scary character, sure the kills were violent and quite well done for a slasher movie but when we cant even hear Michael breathing properly and no one can see a 7 foot giant walking around with a knife, you have to ask why Zombie even bothered making this.
The ending or the last 30 minutes was tense and great fun but overall I just felt cheated and annoyed that the original vision of Michael Myers to be a scary character was butchered (no pun intended).
The movie didn't feel cohesive, some dialouge and scenes didn't work at all which was a shame and Im sick of Zombie casting the same people in his movies!!! His wife was good in this but got taken out too early. Lets just hope Zombie decides to do something original in the horror genre next time.
Overall a 6.2/10 for the unrated cut. Watch the original as Id give that a 9 and at least that one is scary and tense.
Hostel: Part II (2007)
A toned down but much better Hostel
I hated Hostel part 1. It disgusted me. Give the guy credit for making such a sick flick. Still i didn't like it. This one however is a different story altogether. Its kinda like Kill Bill 1 and 2. I would never compare this to Kill Bill but in terms of structure its the same sorta thing. The first is violent, the second is more story driven. Thats what part two is like. A lot less violent than part 1 but the sexual kills were still gross. Especially the castration at the end.
We get to see things from the torturers point of view and this movie was better for it. I really like getting to know how the whole operation worked instead of seeing people die every 10 mins or so.
Some ppl will hate this as its really tolerable in terms of violence but I believe it was a much better movie for it. Still no where near as good as other horrors but a decent effort by Roth.
If you liked the first a lot then you probably wont like this as there isn't too much violence. If you hated the first and want to see a more story driven or character driven movie then watch this. Just be prepared for some really bad acting by that ugly girl who gets hung up and slashed.
Saw IV (2007)
The Best SAW yet
Just watched this yesterday which was our official release date. I was not disappointed. In fact this SAW was the best one yet. The story is very complex and my mate didn't get the ending but I explained it to him. You really have to pay attention during this SAW as it's very complex. There are basically three sub plots going on that are all linked. You have to watch SAW 2 and SAW 3 as a lot of things are linked to those movies in this one. The gore is here but not as much as in SAW 3 which I was thankful for. The traps are more twisted though and some are archaic looking. We also get to find out why Jigsaw traps people and a lot more backstory is revealed. The SAW series is one of my favourite series of movies and this would be a solid 9.2/10 in my mind. It is done very differently compared to the others and the ending left me satisfied unlike 3 where I wanted to immediately find out what would happen next. SAW IV and SAW 2 are the best ones in my opinion and I cannot wait for SAW V. The Games Have Just Begun.
Cube (1997)
Mindf*ck
Thats the only way to describe this movie. Strangers wake up inside a cube and then have to work together to get out in one piece. Various traps are set and they have to avoid them. The thing pulling this movie along is the incredible acting by all the cast members. They are all believable and fit their roles like a glove. There isn't much gore at all but we don't need it. The film survives on its interesting premise and great acting. If I had one complaint it would be that the film repeats itself a lot....going to each room for an hour and a half or so is quite tedious and also the movie felt a little long. Despite these flaws, it is still one of the best sci fi movies to come along in a long time. A cult classic.
AVP: Alien vs. Predator (2004)
Flawed But Good
A good movie this is. For one we can see everything clearly. The plot is average but we get to see a lot of fighting between the aliens and predators. The acting isn't good but this doesn't affect the movie too badly. I did feel that there should have been less build up to the fighting. We already know about the aliens and predators! The creatures themselves are great and no cgi can be seen. The action was good but they toned down the gore. The ending is understandable unlike its sequel which made no sense at all. If your a predator or alien fan then see it. The last 40 mins makes up for the rest of the movie. A solid 8/10
AVPR: Aliens vs Predator - Requiem (2007)
2nd Disappointment this year
AVP1 was enjoyable and a solid 8/10. Its sequel however isn't so great. For a start the movie isn't that easy to follow. This is due to terrible lighting....whoever did this should be shot. Secondly the movie didn't flow. Despite this it was still entertaining just not great. What they need to do is make a movie in the same vein as Predator 2...the humans in this movie (AVPR) are silly and we don't care if they die or not. Also a lot of the gore wasn't shown which was a shame in my opinion. This is the second disappointment after I Am Legend this year and I really don't see why Hollywood can't make a good sequel for once (SAW series aside). See it but don't expect to see much.
Ginger Snaps (2000)
Terrible movie
I don't know what I was expecting before watching this. Certainly something a lot better thats for sure. This movie had a good idea but really failed in all aspects to capitalize on it. It was incredibly tame and very very boring. I found myself fast forwarding towards the end just to see if it could redeem itself. Alas it was not the case. There is very little blood or gore and no scares at all. If you want a good werewolf movie, watch Dog Soldiers. The werewolf portrayed in this film doesn't look like one and it doesn't appear until the end of the movie. A serious waste of time and energy, avoid at all costs. I have no idea how this movie managed to get such a high average on this website.
Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998)
Not as Good as Snatch but still great fun
This is a funny movie and it doesn't have to try at all to be funny. Action comedies rarely work but this one manages to pull it off rather well by focusing on a small group of characters and one situation....the accumulation of 2 guns. Unlike Snatch however there aren't as many laughs to be had but there are still some very funny moments especially at the end of the film. The acting was great, the script was well done and overall a very entertaining piece of work.The lighting was great as was the use of filters and you could really tell in a good way that this was not filmed in the U S of A. Highly Recommend that you watch this and Snatch.
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998)
Something Very Different
This is one crazy film. It follows two guys as they are driving to Las Vegas and the fun they have whilst on drugs in Vegas. Depp is perfect for this role and narrates it very well. What makes this film stand out from other films is the humour and the fact that we get to see what they are seeing and hearing whilst high. One memorable scene is when Depp sees everyone as Reptiles in the hotel bar. It is hilarious and later on in the film we see Depp with a Lizard tail attached to him.
At times the movie is sick and twisted like when Depp is talking about Police doing an under age girl and also the mess these two characters leave behind is quite disgusting.
The director made good use of the camera and lighting and has crafted a film so strange and so bizarre that you have to see it to understand how brilliant it is. Some say its a pointless movie but maybe thats the point that there is no point.
Overall a 7.8/10
The Godfather Part III (1990)
Could Have Been So Much More
Lets get one thing straight....sequels are usually worse than the previous entry before it. Not so with the Godfather Part 2. However THIS film could have been so much more. I didn't feel that it held that Epic quality that the first two had. The acting was fine but I felt there was too much singing and the plot wasn't quite as interesting as it could have been. Two films would have been enough but we got three. It's still a good film, just not much more than that. I think they waited too long to make this and that because of that the quality of the film suffered a little bit. I mean especially when the guy asks the other guy to act like a donkey...that was a weird moment for me. Still if you have seen the first two then you should finish watching the trilogy....just don't expect to be blown away with this one.
Gridiron Gang (2006)
Better Than Expected
I have seen many films dealing with American Football, this was one of the better ones but still a few problems existed. First of all the good:
The Rock and Xzibit's acting was well done and the 'Rock' gave his all in his role. The story was good and very emotional. For once there was a lot more football shown than we are usually given in a movie like this.
The bad: At times the emotional content of the film was overused and combined with the music and acting....on more than one occasion I thought 'The Rock' and Xzibit would say I love you guys...to the team. As usual we never see the final game being played....cmon how many movies like this do we see where they get to the final only for them to lose and we don't see them playing.
Overall though better than expected and well worth a watch.
I Am Legend (2007)
A Little Bit Disappointing
The truth about this film is that there was way too much hype surrounding it and I got caught up in it. I went into this film with extremely high hopes of how awesome it would be. What I got instead was a well acted but strange film that didn't seem cohesive in many parts. Will Smith as usual was on par with his acting, its the script that could have done with some major changes. For a start the creatures were believable, unlike so many of these kinds of films. The script offered some good ideas but failed to capitalize on many of them like on how to bring the creatures under control...this was under utilized, there was also a very silly idea at the end of the film with the grenade, it could have been done differently....watch it and you will see what i mean. However i did thoroughly enjoy the first 40 minutes or so but then the film went off track a little bit...the ending was another very weak point. Despite my negative comments I urge you to watch this film and make up your own mind on whether it is good or not...this is just my personal indication of how I felt about it....my friends who watched it with me felt the same.