Communication Skills Journal by

Masio Sangster

Intro
Communication is very universal and an important aspect to our lives, it is what gives us
the ability to feel, think, and build connections in the world that surrounds us. In this
journal presentation there will be five journal entries that will cover questions asked within
these specific areas. In these journal entries there will be a series of questions that I have
previously answered and will now include my updated response from those same
questions.
 Communication Competence

Based on the assessments, what are your strengths as a communicator?

My strengths as a communicator include engaging in proper conversation with strangers. I also find
myself to be able to present projects in front of a crowd of strangers as well. I often find myself to be very
theatrical in the way I speak, which can catch a lot of people’s eyes. A lot of people often tell me I'm very
animated in the way I speak, which says a lot. To me, it says that I'm able to keep the grasp of a listener for a
very long time. 

Based on the assessments, what are your strengths as a communicator?

My best strengths as a communicator are between dyad and group communication, I feel like I thrive
in best when I'm in groups because I am able to present myself in powerful leader speaking role and take
intuitive within these types of settings. I am also able to dissociate biases into conversation because It feels
interesting to see different points of view even if you don't agree with them. 

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 Perception & Self

What do you think has most impacted your perception of others? Think about your
culture, family, and social influences. Based on what you have learned about perception of
others, choose one concept you plan to improve on moving forward? (Impression management;
cognitive complexity; attribution error; etc from Chapter 2.2)

I believe what has impacted me the most in the perception of others is seeing others through a
social influence. We are quick to adapt and change in certain social environments that cause us to
behave or act differently. It's like we are constantly mirroring each other and forgetting sometimes to
act as ourselves. I think it's easy for people to switch up their personalities which then cause me to
notice that they're acting "strange" or "different", it feels like I can't trust someone who can't be
themselves all the time. I think there is a difference in mirroring someone vs. someone having
incredible impression management skills. Having great impression management skills brings out
confidence within your communication and adaptability style. During a job interview or speaking to
someone who I want to make a networking connection with, I use this tool to help me pick up on
subtle things someone may be interested in wanting to hear, especially if applies to my personal life
and it's true. Everyone uses this tool to assess them in their life and I feel that it isn't a people-
pleasing quality at all.  I want to improve on cognitive  complexity because it teaches the importance
of being mindfulness. 

  What do you think has most impacted your perception of self and/or self-presentation?
Think about your culture, family, and social influences. Based on what you have learned about
perception of self, choose one concept you plan to improve on moving forward?

What has really impacted my perception of myself is the influence from other social
influences. I don't have a close relationship with my family so I wouldn't let anything they say to me
affect my life, they're problematic and I always told myself I wouldn't want to grow up like that, so I
decided to be not socially toxic. Being Biracial, I get a mix of two cultures, and both are great in
their own ways but I don't let that change how I interact with others either. I'm not saying I don't like
acknowledging or celebrating my culture, but I am saying that I wouldn't base my personality off it.
It's important to have a strong culture of course! I am a highly sensitive person, though I am not
vocal about it, my energy and my one worded responses give it away. Being perceived as highly
sensitive can sometimes be frustrating because it gives the misconception of being too soft or weak,
but we fail to acknowledge that it is okay to react to different social situations differently than others.
Being labeled as someone who is sensitive but also being someone who is loud, energetic,
charismatic, and " a dream". can feel a little difficult to understand. I would like to improve on my
own self-perception and come to an understanding that these qualities of myself will always be with
me.

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 Verbal and Nonverbal Messages

As you know, communication is irreversible and it shapes human identity and

I believe that you can adapt verbal and nonverbal effectiveness while not crossing the
ethical line, it just comes with the matter of how I can communicate myself or ideas in a
respectful way to others. Acknowledging that everyone comes from different backgrounds,
religions, cultures, identities, and etc. There are others who unintentionally sometimes cross
the line in their forms of communications both verbally or nonverbally whether that's
showing a sign of discomfort in their body language or referring to someone as the wrong
pronoun. Everyone makes sense and it just comes back to if you can acknowledge and
correct yourself in those situations to benefit in a ethical usage of verbal and nonverbal
communication.  

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 Listening Skills

Do you believe you are an effective listener? Why or why not? Use what you learned in
Chapter 5 as evidence for your answer. 

I believe I am very strong effective listener; I am an emphatic listener so it's important to try and
relate to certain people’s emotions and give them a sense of validation. I do find it hard sometimes with
certain people to have a strong listening bond with them because of my ADHD, it's easy to find myself
spacing out.  I love engaging in a nonverbal way and to really put my heart on the line is a really
powerful move from me

How has listening and empathy played a positive or negative role in your relationships and
interactions with others? How might you improve?

Usually, it plays a positive role in my life as it shows people that I am willing to listen to anything
they tell me, but this also gives people the opportunity to manipulate me if they see if I am being 100%
emotional receptive. There are sometimes people who try to unload all of their emotional baggage onto
me and so I have to set certain boundaries so that I don't become someone's therapist.

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 Interpersonal Communication

Explain one specific theory or concept about interpersonal communication that applies to
the relationship. How has that theory about interpersonal communication changed your
perspective on the relationship or helped you gain understanding? How can that theory about
interpersonal communication help you improve upon the relationship?

Social penetration theory is the social theory that to understand one's depth as a human you must
peel back the onion layers to understand them. I really like this theory a lot because I relate to it on a
personal and spiritual level, I often find myself wanting to peel back others layers to understand who they
truly are deep inside. It's like looking inside a clam shell for the first time. I think it's something that people
should do instead of getting to know someone on a surface level, there is much hidden deep down that we
shy away from. It's okay to be secretive but it's not healthy to hide away certain things from your life

In Chapter 6.2 you learned about interpersonal conflict and the different conflict management
styles. You also completed a conflict style assessment and interpersonal competence assessment, based
on these, how do you your conflict handling styles affect your overall interpersonal communication
competence? Can you think of a current (or past) conflict where shifting your conflict style may help
with its resolution? How does conflict connect to the dark side of interpersonal communication and
how do you think learning about conflict can help?

I am a very compromising person and so I would easily relate myself to the compromise style of
conflict, I try to avoid confrontation as much as possible because I would consider myself a harmonizer in
certain situations. There have been times where I have to assert myself and take charge, which can come off
as passive aggressive, but as long as people understand I’m not coming from a place of rudeness or pure
aggression then there shouldn’t be an issue.

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 Final Summary

My biggest takeaway while taking this course and my communication abilities, I realized how
avoidant I can be in certain conversations. It’s not that I lack in participation in thought, it’s more of the
idea that I would analyze and observe what is being said rather than just speak. I feel like listening is very
important factor in communication and I love listening to others speak their thoughts and feelings, as if I
were their therapist. I’m not enabling people to trauma-dump their problems onto me, but it’s important
to be heard regardless of what’s on your mind or what you’re feeling. In terms of improvement, I feel like
I can still have empathy for others but not have to sugarcoat anything, a lot of times people like to be told
what they want to hear. But it would just be better if I could be upfront about certain topics and opinions
instead of trying to people-please.