Disqualifying Others - Format Translation Template

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Psychology Tools
Disqualifying Others
Cognitive Distortions
Whenever we feel strong emotions – such as fear, sadness, shame, or

hopelessness – we’ve often had an automatic thought. These thoughts can
happen so quickly and effortlessly that we’re not even aware we’ve had them. It
can take practice to notice them as they arise. Automatic thoughts often feel
convincing, but they are not always 100% accurate.
They are often exaggerated, biased, distorted, or unrealistic. There are different
types of biases, which psychologists call cognitive distortions or unhelpful
thinking styles. We all think in exaggerated ways sometimes, but it can become a
problem if your thoughts are distorted very often or very strongly.
She’s just being nice when she says I look pretty.
He wouldn’t say that if he knew what I was really like.
She doesn’t mean that – she just wants something from me.
The only reason he won is because he got lucky.
Disqualifying others is common across a wide range of problems:
Body dysmorphic disorder

Childhood trauma
Depression
Low self-esteem
Narcissism
Paranoia
PTSD
Psychosis
Relationship problems
Social anxiety
Overcoming disqualifying others
Noticing and labelling
The first step in overcoming disqualifying others is catching it. Practice self-
monitoring so that you get better at noticing these thoughts as they arise. When
you notice one, say something to yourself like:
“I’m discounting someone again.”
“There’s another disqualifying thought.”
Embrace the positives
Notice and accept the positive things people say or do. If you dismiss positive
feedback:
Write down the nice things people say about you.
Practice saying ‘thank you’ when someone compliments you.
If you tend to discount the positives in other people:
Accept that everyone has unique strengths and abilities.
Practice giving people genuine compliments on their talents.
Weigh up the pros and cons
Make a list of advantages and disadvantages of disqualifying the positives. Ask

yourself:
What problems does disqualifying other people say cause me?

How would things improve if I accepted the positive things they say or do?
What will happen if I continue to do this? Will things get better or worse for me?
Evaluate your thinking
Remember that there are lots of ways of judging any situation. Practice putting
your thoughts in perspective by asking yourself these questions:
“What would I say to a friend who was thinking in this way?”
“What’s the evidence that this thought is true?”
“What’s unhelpful about thinking this way?”
“What’s a more helpful way of thinking about this?”

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Disqualifying Others - Format Translation Template

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Thank you for helping to translate this Psychology Tools resource.

Email your completed translation to [email protected]

Would you like to be acknowledged on the Psychology Tools website?

Whenever we feel strong emotions – such as fear, sadness, shame, or

She’s just being nice when she says I look pretty.

He wouldn’t say that if he knew what I was really like.

The only reason he won is because he got lucky.

Disqualifying others is common across a wide range of problems:

Body dysmorphic disorder

Overcoming disqualifying others

Noticing and labelling

“There’s another disqualifying thought.”

Embrace the positives

Write down the nice things people say about you.

Practice saying ‘thank you’ when someone compliments you.

If you tend to discount the positives in other people:

Accept that everyone has unique strengths and abilities.

Practice giving people genuine compliments on their talents.

Weigh up the pros and cons

Make a list of advantages and disadvantages of disqualifying the positives. Ask

What problems does disqualifying other people say cause me?

Evaluate your thinking

“What would I say to a friend who was thinking in this way?”

“What’s the evidence that this thought is true?”

“What’s unhelpful about thinking this way?”

“What’s a more helpful way of thinking about this?”

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