Kumo Desu Ga, Nani Ka - Volume 09 (Yen Press) (Kobo LNWNCentral)
Kumo Desu Ga, Nani Ka - Volume 09 (Yen Press) (Kobo LNWNCentral)
Kumo Desu Ga, Nani Ka - Volume 09 (Yen Press) (Kobo LNWNCentral)
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“Ahhh-choo!”
“The hell?! That’s disgusting, Master! You got your gross spit all over me!”
“Hngh. My apologies. Someone must have been talking about me.”
“All bad things, I’m sure.”
“What nonsense! If you bothered to listen more closely, no doubt the masses
are praising my name!”
“Oh yeah, sure. Wait, Master, are you crying?”
“Hmm? How strange. Perhaps some dust got into my eye during that sneeze.”
“Must’ve been some big freaking piece of dust to make you cry.”
“Quiet, you. Here, have some extra homework.”
“What?! You demon! Maybe I’ll just kill you and escape from this hell!”
“Wah-ha-ha! There is no time for rest on the path to the heights of occultism!
You won’t see me dying until I reach the top!”
ARRIVAL AT THE DEMON LORD’S CASTLE
We stayed at the Colonel’s place for a few days, then headed out.
We may have finally reached the demon realm, but it’s a pretty big place, so
we still have to find a place where we can actually settle down. The Colonel’s
lands border human territory, so it’s not an ideal place for royalty like the
Demon Lord to set up camp.
I was feeling pretty low about having to take another long journey in that
stupid bouncy carriage, but it turned out I was wrong. Our destination was
super-close to the border.
I mean, it took us several years to cross the span of humanity’s domain, so
wouldn’t most people assume it would take just as long to cross the demon
realm?
But apparently it takes only a week—just seven days. And that’s going at a
mellow pace, too.
Hmm. Yeah, I guess seven days by carriage is a bit of a distance, but since I
was bracing myself for a year or more, this seems easy by comparison.
“The Demon Lord’s not your average ruler, y’know? I gotta fight on the front
lines. So obviously my castle has to be close to the border for that reason,
among others.”
That’s straight from the Demon Lord’s mouth.
Right. I guess in this world, the Demon Lord doesn’t just wait around in a
castle like the final boss of an RPG.
In fact, this one leaves her castle all the time!
Can you imagine what kind of impossible game would have a demon lord who
leaves the castle and chases you down on the overworld map?
Just stay in the castle, dammit!
Otherwise it’s not a demon lord’s castle at all!
Plus, this one didn’t even leave the castle to kill a hero—she left to kill ME!
Remembering that kinda makes me mad, so I try to smack the Demon Lord on
the head, but she dodges me easily.
Grrrr! If only I still had power! Then I could slap that smug little head of hers!
Power! Give me powerrr!
“And what exactly are you doing?”
As I reach out longingly for power, Vampy gives me a cold glare.
Stop! Don’t look at me like that!
If a pretty little girl like you glares at me, it might awaken some new darkness
within!
No, just kidding, it won’t.
Anyway, while I was having that stupid exchange in my head, we arrived at
the Demon Lord’s castle.
In total defiance of the image that phrase evokes, it’s actually super-gorgeous.
The place is so beautiful and magnificent that if it was on Earth, it’d probably
be officially recognized as a World Heritage Site.
Magnificent is one thing, but why is it beautiful…?
Isn’t a demon lord’s castle supposed to be more, y’know, spooky?
“Some demon lord’s castle that is.”
See? Vampy’s not feeling it, either.
Incidentally, there’s a lovely little castle town, too.
Although the atmosphere’s a bit dampened by the giant wall around the
outermost perimeter. It’s like a fortress wall, really.
But can you blame them?
There are monsters and stuff in this world. It’s dangerous not to have walls to
keep them out. Besides, this is the Demon Lord’s turf, so they might even get
attacked by humans.
So it makes sense that they would need a nice, sturdy wall for defense.
Anyway, the castle town inside those walls is the biggest I’ve ever seen, I
think.
The towns and cities in this world are pretty tiny, since they have to be walled
in and all.
You gotta make the walls first, then the rest of the town.
So of course the size of every settlement is limited to the size of the walled
area.
They can add on to the walls to expand, but that has its limits, too, so most
towns and even cities in this world are pretty small.
From that perspective, the Demon Lord’s castle town is actually so big, I don’t
even know what to make of it.
The biggest place I’ve seen so far in this world is the capital of Sariella. Being
the capital of a major country and all, it was pretty darn big.
But this castle town puts it to shame.
I don’t know exactly how big either of them is, so this is just an estimate, but I
think the castle town must be at least twice the size of that capital.
And that’s just my impression from going from the outer wall straight to the
castle, so it might be even bigger for all I know.
It’s times like these that I wish I could still look at the map with Panoptic
Vision.
Back when I had my skills, I could use Panoptic Vision and other sense-
enhancing skills to find out the measurements of distance around me without
even really trying.
But now, no matter how hard I concentrate, I can see only as far as my
average field of vision—until something blocks it, that is.
In a town like this, that means I can pretty much see only what’s right in front
of my face.
I feel pretty helpless, to be honest.
I know that’s just how it is, but I can’t help being frustrated that I can no
longer do all the things I used to be able to do.
Gotta hurry up and master the use of my power so I can get my old abilities
back.
While I’m busy being lost in thought, we arrive at our destination.
The Demon Lord’s castle—no, a fancy house nearby.
It’s not as impressive as the castle, but it’s still a beautiful palace-like manor
that would easily land on the cultural heritage list.
“So we’re not even going to the castle?” Vampy grumbles, but her mood
quickly recovers as she looks at the palace with sparkling eyes.
At times like these, Vampy actually reacts the way a little girl is supposed to.
It’s a lot more charming than the way she always sits around polishing her
broadsword and grinning like a maniac.
What, me? Come on—I’m about function over fashion, that’s all.
Anyway, we’re being brought to a parlor room now.
It seems like we’ll be staying in here, actually, so maybe it’s more like a guest
room?
From what I hear, we’re staying in guest rooms because the master of the
house is away and might not be back for a while.
The butler in charge of the palace didn’t want to keep us waiting in the parlor
forever, so he kindly prepared guest rooms for each of us.
Damn, this guy’s good!
I wonder who’s a better butler, him or Mera?
Well, he looks like he’s around his forties, just like the Colonel, but since he’s
a demon, he’s probably actually lived a really long life.
He might have the advantage over Mera in terms of experience.
“All righty. Well, let’s figure out our plans for the future before the master of
the house gets back.”
We all got our own rooms, but for now, we’re gathering in the Demon Lord’s
room to talk about what to do next.
Although we already discussed it a bit on the way here, so we’re mostly just
reaffirming that.
“Firstly, once I meet with the master of the house, I’ll be moving to the castle.
Ael and Merazophis, you’ll come with me.”
The Demon Lord is going to the Demon Lord’s castle.
The person who lives here is currently in charge of the Demon Lord’s castle,
or in fact all of demonkind, since the Demon Lord has been away. Once they
meet up, the Demon Lord will probably take over those duties again.
Makes sense. That is her job, after all.
The problem is that she’s bringing Ael, who’s normally the one in charge of
reining in her crazy siblings.
Are the other three puppet spiders gonna be okay without her? I’m a little
concerned.
On the other hand, Vampy doesn’t just look concerned. She looks outright
furious.
That makes sense, too. Mera’s going to the Demon Lord’s castle without her.
Normally, as her servant, he’s supposed to be at Vampy’s side at all times.
But I think because of Vampy’s attitude, the Demon Lord’s decided that it
would be best to keep Mera away from her for a while.
Her whole yandere thing has gotten pretty severe over the years.
I think the Demon Lord’s probably got the right idea of giving them a little
cooling-off period, then trying to raise the baby bloodsucker to be a bit more
levelheaded.
Yeah, it’s a logical decision.
But logic doesn’t work on a crazy yandere, so I don’t know how well this is
gonna go.
“The rest of you will stay here. I’ll assign a private tutor to Sophia and then
have her start going to school once she’s old enough.”
At this, Vampy’s scowl gets even darker.
Evidently, the demon realm has schools and stuff, too, and the academy here
is where all the kids of noble families go.
Vampy will have to start attending soon, so for now she’s going to be
educated by a private tutor first.
She’s a reincarnation and all, so she was able to learn some things on the way
here. I’m sure she’ll do fine in school, grades-wise.
But the main goal in sending Vampy to the academy isn’t to get an education
—it’s to expand her circle of friends and cure her of her yandere ways!
Will it work? Probably not, but you never know!
But while I’ve already more or less given up, the Demon Lord seems pretty
serious about her plan to rehabilitate Vampy.
Yeah, good luck with that. If anyone can do it, it’s you, I’m sure.
“And then there’s White, who’s sitting there like this has nothing to do with
her! I’m gonna give you work to do, too, so don’t let me down!”
Wait…what?!
You’re gonna put ME to work?!
Okay, I’m overreacting, but seriously. You want me to work?
You know what I’m like now, right? I hate to admit it, but I’m a totally useless
piece of junk at the moment, okay?
Huh? That’s weird. There’s some sort of strange, salty liquid coming out of my
eyes.
“If you don’t work, you don’t eat—that’s how the rule goes! So obviously we
gotta have you pay with your body, White.”
The Demon Lord grins wickedly as she comes closer.
Uh, hang on a sec. Between that phrasing and that face, are you saying you’re
gonna sell me?
Am I gonna have to do a bunch of unspeakable things in some sketchy place?!
I get up to flee from the Demon Lord’s evil hand, but in my fragile state, the
difference between our speeds is laughable.
She grabs me from behind easily, then gropes my chest.
“Hey, these are pretty nice!”
EEEEP! Stop it—let go of me! I didn’t agree to this!
“That’s enough.”
“Oof!”
All at once, I’m released from the Demon Lord’s grasp.
Turning around, I see her head, or rather her hair, being yanked back by
Vampy.
I appreciate you saving me, but doesn’t that seem a little harsh?
You’re gonna do some serious damage to the Demon Lord’s roots, there.
But she did rescue me, and she also looks super-pissed right now, so I’m not
gonna say anything like that to her.
I’m a girl who knows how to read the room.
“Ow, owww. Fine, that’s enough joking. I was just gonna ask you to make
thread for me, okay, White? Just make as much of it as you can. If you could
craft some high-defense clothes out of it, that would be even better.”
The Demon Lord rubs the back of her head as she reveals her true intentions.
…Come on—you’ve got Suffering Nullification. That probably didn’t even hurt.
Thread, though, huh?
During the Mystic Mountains incident, I regained the ability to produce
thread.
It kinda reawakened when we were in a life-and-death crisis. Pretty cliché, if I
do say so myself.
Anyway, it was sorta like an emergency-induced feat of supernatural strength,
but I tested some things out afterward and found that I can produce it
whenever I want.
Unfortunately, though, none of my other abilities have come back, and
producing the thread is all I can do with it.
Yeah, I can make it move a tiny bit, but I can’t slice up an opponent or tie
them up instantly like I used to be able to do.
And I can decide whether to make it sticky or not, but I can’t fine-tune it the
way I used to with my skills before.
Why would the Demon Lord have any use for such a limited ability?
“Take a look at this. It’s thread that you made, White.”
The Demon Lord produces a piece of thread and starts pulling it with both
hands.
“Hnnngh!”
Given how high her stats are, the thread instantly…doesn’t break?
“Rrrgh! Whew. So yeah, you see?”
After tugging red-faced on the thread for a little while, the Demon Lord gives
up and wheezes.
I stare at her in shock.
“I can’t break the thread you make, even if I use all my strength. And its
Appraisal results just say ‘Cannot be Appraised.’ That means that your thread
exists outside the system, White. You made it this strong without the benefit of
the system. Which also means that it’s resistant to any actions taken within the
system. I don’t know exactly how strong that resistance is just yet, but it’s
definitely really tough. Tougher than any thread I can make with my skills.”
Say what?!
My thread is stronger than the Demon Lord’s Divine Thread Weaving?
Now, that’s unexpected.
When I was experimenting, I was more concerned with what I could do with
the thread than the properties of the thread itself.
But I guess the Demon Lord focused on the thread instead.
I was so preoccupied with the things I couldn’t do that I didn’t even realize
that the thread itself was stronger than what I used to make.
Enough that it’d make exceptionally good material for armor.
“To start, I’d like you to make enough thread for everyone in this room. I’ll
leave Riel and Fiel with you to help make the clothes themselves, so you can let
them take care of that part. Also, it’d be great if you could make a little extra for
research. Basically, I just want you to focus on making thread for a while,
White.”
Ooh, I see. So that’s what she meant by pay with your body.
Well, that’s fine by me.
I still haven’t really done much research with it myself, since I figured I could
make more thread later.
It’s hard to do much when you’re on the road, after all.
Now that I can settle down and do some experimenting, I might even make
some new discoveries.
I used to do that kind of thing whenever I got new skills.
And this thread of mine is a completely new power, so the rules of skills don’t
even apply anymore.
Since it’s not standardized like a skill would be, thinking of it in terms of what
it can and can’t do might be wrong in the first place. Skills have clear limitations
to what they can accomplish, but those limits don’t matter to me anymore.
Even if I can’t do certain things now, I might be able to in the future.
The possibilities are endless. It all depends on my own effort and creativity.
I guess when I think about it that way, it is a little exciting.
Besides, if I keep producing lots of thread, I might figure out how to use some
of my other abilities, too.
Producing thread is a function the human body doesn’t have.
In other words, I’m using magic of some kind to create it.
Whether I’m aware of it or not, that means there’s some mysterious power at
work.
If I can get a better sense of this power, then I might be able to reproduce
other abilities, too.
However, I’m now able to produce thread as naturally as moving my body, so
it won’t be easy to figure out how it works.
People don’t normally need to put any thought into moving their hands and
feet, and even if they did, it wouldn’t help them better understand how it
happened, exactly.
But if I give up just because it’s hard, then I’ve already lost!
So from now on, I’ll be a thread-making machine!
Once I nod my affirmation, the Demon Lord addresses the last unassigned
person.
“Sael, you’ll be Sophia’s bodyguard.”
Sael only does what she’s told, so she has to be paired up with someone or
she won’t even move.
Since the role of bodyguard requires directions only in emergency situations,
it’s the perfect role for Sael, as usual.
That said, Vampy doesn’t look thrilled being paired up with Sael.
Huh? Hey, wait a second.
Doesn’t that mean I’m stuck looking after the other two problem children?
My eyes widening, I look at Riel and Fiel in horror.
Riel is a natural weirdo, and Fiel is violent and energetic.
Even right now, Riel is wearing a smile that makes it impossible to tell what
she’s thinking, while Fiel is smiling like she’s not thinking about anything at all.
I’m gonna be working with these two?
Will I really be able to get anything done?
…Hoo, boy.
The lord of the mansion wound up returning late at night.
He’s a young man, or at least he appears to be.
But since demons live longer than humans, it’s impossible to tell what his
actual age is.
Since he seems very composed despite his young appearance, he might be a
lot older than he looks.
“Always a pleasure to see you again, O Demon Lord.”
The man kneels in front of the Demon Lord.
His expression is calm, but it looks to me like he’s actually pretty nervous.
“Mm-hmm, good work.” The Demon Lord smiles cheerfully. “You been
keeping busy?”
“Yes, quite. But I felt it of the utmost importance to prioritize greeting you
upon your return, O Demon Lord.”
The man seems taken aback by the Demon Lord’s attitude.
Oh, I get it. He probably knows her only from before she got mixed up with
my former body brain.
I didn’t exactly have any real conversations with the Demon Lord before then,
but she definitely seemed a lot different.
If you were familiar with the old Demon Lord, then the difference probably
seems a lot more drastic.
The fact that the Colonel didn’t even blink at that makes me think it’s likely
he’s up to no good after all.
Although if just saying good work was enough to surprise the man this much,
how exactly did she act toward him before?
“Thanks. Since I brought some new folks, y’mind introducing yourself to
them?”
The man stands obediently and bows his head toward us.
“Pleased to make your acquaintance. I am Balto Phthalo, in charge of the
Phthalo region.”
“Balto’s basically the archduke who mediates among all the demons, so if you
need anything, he’s your guy.”
Hmm.
So he’s the second-most-important demon after the Demon Lord, huh?
The Colonel seemed like he symbolized the military might of the borderlands,
so maybe Balto is more about politics.
He totally acts like a government official, for one thing.
After we’ve all been introduced, they discuss the future for a bit. Sounds like
the group moving to the Demon Lord’s castle should be able to do that without
a problem.
However, Mera and Ael won’t be able to work directly under the Demon Lord.
There aren’t any positions for them that report to the Demon Lord herself,
and it’ll take some time to reorganize things for them.
I guess that makes sense, since the Demon Lord’s been away for years.
So for now, Ael will be stationed at the Demon Lord’s side as her assistant,
and Mera will temporarily be assigned to the Fourth Army.
Mera himself is the one who wanted to be part of the army. I guess he
thought he’d be better off there than at the Demon Lord’s side.
It must still be bothering him that he wasn’t able to put up much of a fight
against Mr. Oni in the Mystic Mountains.
Balto is personally in charge of the Fourth Army, which is usually assigned to
defend this area, the Phthalo region.
The reason the capital city’s army isn’t number one is that number one is
usually stationed at the border abutting human lands.
In other words, the Colonel’s men are army number one.
Anyway, the rest of us leftovers get permission to live in this mansion. We
even get to stay in the rooms we’re using right now.
Vampy’s personal tutor will be assigned in the next few days, too.
We’re all taken care of.
The Demon Lord’s got some serious pull.
Between her physical and political power, she might actually be the strongest
person I know.
Thus, our journey came to an end.
From this point on, each of us will start working toward our own goals.
The Demon Lord will work to bring the demons together and start a war
against the humans.
Vampy will work to grow up healthy, uh, both physically and mentally.
I’ll work to regain the powers I lost.
We each have a goal.
Our battle has only just begun!
THE OLD BUTLER’S FRIGHTFUL
EXPERIENCE
We’ve been living in the duke’s mansion for a few days now.
How is it so far? Freakin’ awesome!
I mean, I guess that’s no surprise. I’ve been living on the road for an eternity,
only staying in camps or inns for a day or two at a time.
Obviously that’s not gonna compare to living in a fancy mansion.
So allow me to describe my elegant lifestyle in the duke’s mansion.
First, I wake up.
When? Well, that varies.
I can sleep in a comfy bed for as long as I want, and I can also stay up all night
if I feel like it, so obviously my sleep schedule is all over the place.
You can’t blame me for that!
Next, once I wake up, Riel and Fiel play dress up with me for a while.
Kind of ironic that a couple of dolls are using me as their plaything, isn’t it?
Not that I mind.
Once they mess around with my clothes and hair and even put makeup on me
and all that junk, it’s time for breakfast.
The staff makes breakfast for me while Riel and Fiel have their fun with my
look for the day.
My wake-up time is pretty random, so of course they have to remake
breakfast for me most days.
Sure, it’s probably inconvenient to the cooks, but just consider it a necessary
sacrifice for the luxurious lifestyle I so deserve.
I eat breakfast in my room with Riel and Fiel.
Being the mansion of a duke and all, the food is of course delicious. A little bit
mass-produced-ish, maybe, but that’s all right.
You can’t expect the chefs to make their absolute finest dishes every day
around the clock, right?
Let’s just go with that.
I’m sure it’s not that the chefs resent me or anything of the sort.
After breakfast, it’s time for work. By which I just mean producing thread.
This is the one thing I actually take seriously.
To be honest, producing thread is easy in itself. It comes so naturally that I
kinda have to wonder why I wasn’t able to do it before that incident in the
Mystic Mountains at this point.
On top of that, it doesn’t take a lot of effort. I don’t get tired no matter how
much I produce, and it doesn’t feel like the energy inside me has decreased.
So just producing thread on its own is easy, and I can make as much of it as I
need.
But if I just sit around randomly making thread, I’m not gonna get anywhere.
My goal is to regain at least as much strength as I used to have, maybe even
more.
When I had skills, just using them frequently would make my skill level go up,
but it doesn’t work like that anymore.
Practice makes perfect, so there’s certainly no harm in doing just that, but if I
want to master the use of my power, simply producing thread isn’t enough.
The hope is that I might be able to use that sensation as a starting point for
figuring out how to use my other powers, so I try to concentrate on that while I
work.
…But so far, that hasn’t produced any results.
The fact that I can produce thread so naturally actually makes it harder to
pinpoint the feeling. Since I can produce it whenever I want, it means I can
actually do it without thinking.
It’s hard to be aware of what it feels like to not be aware of doing something,
y’know?
Maybe it’s like when a natural genius is trying to tutor someone else and can’t
understand why their pupil doesn’t understand something.
So I’m trying different things while I produce thread, but the only result is…
more thread.
Looks like it might be a while before I can reproduce any of my other skills.
But anyway, Riel and Fiel gather up the thread I make and turn it into clothes,
make balls of yarn, send everything to the Demon Lord, and so on, so at least
it’s not a total waste of time.
Once I get hungry, I stop work for a bit and have some lunch.
Still seems kinda mass-produced, but yeah, that’s no big deal!
On the rare occasion that I actually manage to eat lunch at the proper time,
the difference in extravagance is obvious.
They’re not cutting corners!
It’s just that I’m a little too careless with my schedule, that’s all!
The chefs are doing me a kindness by feeding me anyway!
Yeah, let’s go with that.
Once I’m done eating lunch, I have free time, which I spend differently
depending on the day.
In other words, I just do whatever I feel like.
Like reading books in the mansion library, or knitting with the thread I made
that morning, or striking cool poses while trying to practice magic.
Hmm? What was that last one?
Beats me. Don’t even worry about it.
I definitely don’t remember Riel and Fiel staring at me like they’d just
witnessed something truly pathetic.
Okay? Okay.
Anyway, the rest of the day is free time until dinner.
The one thing I have to be careful about is that if I request dinner at weird
times, like in the middle of the night, the quality of the food takes a huge dip.
Makes sense. Even the chefs at a duke’s mansion probably check out for the
day once they’ve made dinner at the regular time.
If you ask for food after that, it makes sense that you’d just have to help
yourself.
Well, we’re not actually allowed in the kitchen, so a maid has to do it instead,
but the maid can’t cook, either, so it’s always just bread or jerky or whatever.
In other words, food that doesn’t take any actual prep.
I mean, it is tasty, y’know?
It’s a duke’s mansion, so everything they’ve got is the good stuff.
But if you just throw that on a plate and call it a day… Know what I mean?
Unreal.
Which is why I always try to eat dinner around the normal time.
In a way, that’s an even more important mission than producing thread.
Anyway, after dinner, I relax for a while and then sleep.
That’s how most of my days go.
Hmm? All I do is laze around, eat, and sleep, you say?
Well, I suppose you could put it that way.
My only real duty is to make thread like the Demon Lord asked, and that isn’t
even difficult.
I get to live a lazy life every single day.
Is this place heaven or what?!
“What the hell?!”
Just like that, my blissfully lazy lifestyle is rudely interrupted by a loud yell.
Riel and Fiel, who are playing hot potato with balls of thread or something,
immediately assume combat stances.
I can’t see the source of the voice I heard.
Probably because the door to my room is blocked by a wall of thread.
Yeaaah, I kinda covered the entire room they gave me in thread.
Look, I just wouldn’t feel comfortable otherwise! It’s, like, my spider instincts!
And I have to block the sun from coming in through the window ’cause it’s bad
for my skin!
So you can understand why I had to make my room into a mess of
spiderwebs.
That also means that no one can come into my room except Riel and Fiel.
They can easily move the thread aside and enter, probably ’cause they’re
spiders like me. By that logic, I’m guessing Ael, Sael, and the Demon Lord could
get inside, too.
But the maid obviously can’t, so I have her leave my food and stuff outside
the door.
So anyway, my room is off-limits to any non-spider visitors, and some
intruder’s trying to get in right now. A man, judging by the voice.
Why call him an intruder? Because he opened a maiden’s bedroom door
without so much as a knock, so he obviously has no manners.
“Hey, you! What the hell is this stuff?”
“Erm, I believe it was put there by the guest currently using this room, sir. I’m
afraid we don’t know the details, either.”
I can hear the intruder talking to what sounds like a maid as he tugs at the
thread wall.
Judging by the maid’s polite tone, it sounds like this guy must be someone
important.
I guess if he really was an intruder, he wouldn’t have gotten in past the
mansion security. Someone must have let him in and probably even guided him
here.
So maybe the Demon Lord sent him to fetch us or something?
“My dear boy, these rooms are currently occupied by the honored guests of
your esteemed elder brother. Even as the younger brother of the master of the
house, I am afraid you must not simply barge in on them without prior
permission.”
Oh-ho? Sounds like Mr. Head Butler has arrived.
And from what I can hear, he’s telling off the intruder.
“Like I said before, stop calling me dear boy, dammit!”
“And as I believe I have stated, I shall be happy to stop just as soon as you
have become an adult, my dear boy.”
“Ugh!”
Sounds like the intruder is no match for the head butler.
Also, it sounds like he must be the younger brother of Balto, the head of the
house.
So if he’s connected to this place, the Demon Lord probably didn’t send him
here. Actually, I guess I should have known that the Demon Lord wouldn’t
entrust anything to someone so rough-and-tumble in the first place.
“Forget it! Just tell me what this stuff is, then!”
Oof. Sounds like the intruder realized the dear boy thing isn’t going to end
anytime soon, so he’s going back to the original subject.
This is just a hunch, but I can kinda picture him pointing at the wall of thread
from outside the room.
Y’know, for someone from a noble family like the duke’s, he sounds an awful
lot like a hooligan trying his best to look tough.
Instead of “intruder,” let’s call him “hooligan” from here on out.
“It is a material provided by our esteemed guest, as I believe this good woman
has just explained to you.”
“I got that part, dammit! I’m asking you why the hell you’re letting them do
whatever they want with a room in our house!”
Ahhh. I guess I’m the reason Hooligan is so mad.
“And from what I hear, they’re just holing up in there doing some kinda fishy
business! Why the hell would my brother let a buncha sketchy weirdos stay
here?! Dammit!”
“I assure you, the master of the house has granted permission for all this. It is
not for you to complain about, dear boy.”
“And I’m telling ya that ain’t a good enough reason!”
Maybe he and his brother don’t get along?
Based on what he just said, it sounds like the staff of the mansion doesn’t
think super-highly of my activities, but what really seems to bother Hooligan
here is that his brother has given us permission to do whatever we want.
“Listen up! This is my family’s mansion! You can’t just go around filling our
rooms with whatever this crap is! Hey! You in there! I know you can hear me!”
“Please stop, my dear boy!”
“Shut up, old-timer!”
Pffft! Old-timer ! Hooligan just called the head butler old-timer !
It’s pretty hilarious to hear a phrase like that mixed in with all his cursing.
“Ke-ke-ke-ke-ke-ke!”
Suddenly, I hear a weird noise coming from beside me.
Turning to investigate, I see Riel’s shoulders shaking up and down as she
emits the sound.
Um, what are you doing exactly?
Is that supposed to be laughter? What, did that hit your funny bone or
something?
I gave the puppet spiders prototype voice mechanisms a while back, but since
I never got to develop them past the testing stage, they can’t really talk very
well. Usually they don’t bother trying.
So if Riel is going out of her way to produce some kind of laughter, she
must’ve found something seriously funny. It’s kinda creepy, though, to be
honest. Cut it out, will ya?
“What the hell are you laughing at?!”
See?! You made Hooligan even madder!
What’s up with this chaotic situation?
“Please stop this at once!”
“No one’s gonna make a fool outta me!”
The wall of thread shakes violently.
Hooligan must’ve flipped out and tried to punch it.
“What the hell?! I’m stuck?!”
Well, yeah. It’s spider thread.
If you touch it, obviously you’re gonna get stuck.
“Dammit!”
Cursing wildly, Hooligan moves on to his next course of action, which is……
FIRE?!
The wall of thread’s on fire!
What kind of moron sets a fire in his own house?!
Even after my deification, my thread has retained the same basic properties.
In other words, it’s still weak to fire.
It can withstand a certain amount, but this dumbass hooligan must’ve really
blown up big-time, because the flames are burning right through my thread’s
resistance.
He probably used some kind of fire skill, but I guess the skill level was pretty
high. Ha-ha-ha.
Wait, there’s nothing funny about this!
Quick! We have to put out this fire or I’m gonna be burned alive!
All four walls of the room are covered in thread, so if they all catch fire, I’ll
have nowhere to run!
It’s only the area near the door that’s burning right now, but if I don’t act fast,
it’s gonna spread to the rest of the room for sure.
While I’m panicking on the inside, three other figures make their move.
Two of them are Riel and Fiel, so I immediately grab them by the scruffs of
their necks to stop them.
Don’t you dare!
I don’t know what you were planning on doing exactly, but knowing you two,
I’m sure it was nothing good!
Riel looked like she was about to use some kind of magic, and Fiel seemed like
she was going to try to physically ram her way through.
Not only would that not put out the fire, you’d probably destroy this whole
damn mansion!
And even if not, I’m sure Hooligan, the head butler, and the maid standing
nearby would all be killed by the shock waves.
I don’t really care about Hooligan, since this is his fault in the first place, but
the other two would be innocent victims, so I’m gonna have to stop you right
there.
Meanwhile, as I’m stopping these two idiots from destroying everything in
sight, the head butler uses water magic to safely put out the fire.
Figures. That guy is one hell of a butler.
“My dear boy…”
But now, he’s glaring at Hooligan with a vein popping on his forehead.
How do I know that, you ask?
’Cause the wall of thread in front of the doorway burned away, so there’s
nothing blocking my view anymore.
Hooligan, perhaps detecting that he’s gotten himself in over his head, looks
away from the head butler’s glare…
…and meets my eyes.
“Huh?!”
Hooligan catches his breath and freezes.
Um, excuse me, do you mind? Shut-ins don’t like making direct eye contact,
you know.
Also, my eyes are freakishly full of pupils right now, so I’d rather not have
people see them.
Not because it’s embarrassing—it’s just more trouble than it’s worth.
I immediately shut my eyes and turn my face away.
Maybe that’s rude behavior toward the master of the house’s brother, but I’m
pretty sure the guy who tried to bust into a maiden’s room and then set it on
fire is in the wrong here.
Besides, I don’t really care if I offend someone who dredges up my traumatic
memories of having my home burned to the ground!
Oh boy, just thinking about it pisses me off.
Could you please just leave me alone already?
With my grip still on their collars, Riel and Fiel both take a step forward, as if
picking up on my emotions.
At the same time, their tiny bodies start producing a ridiculously powerful
aura.
“…! Please, young master! I must insist that you withdraw before things get
any more out of hand!”
The head butler hurriedly grasps Hooligan’s shoulder and drags him forcibly
out of the room.
Should you really be doing that to a member of the family that employs you?
Then again, if he hadn’t done something, Riel and Fiel might have slashed that
hooligan to ribbons, so that was probably the right call.
“Um…right.”
Hooligan nods dumbly, his violent energy drained away.
I can’t tell for sure, since my eyes are closed, but…is it just me, or is Hooligan
totally glaring at me?
“Show the young master away, please.”
“O-of course. Right this way, please, Master Blow.”
At the head butler’s command, the maid leads Hooligan away.
Now I finally know Hooligan’s name.
Apparently, it’s Blow.
Not that I care. “Hooligan” is good enough for that jerk.
You’ll never catch me calling that guy by his real name; I can promise you that
for sure.
“Please accept my deepest apologies in my master’s place for the young lord’s
terrible rudeness.”
The head butler’s talking to me now.
Opening my eyes a crack, I see that he’s bowing deeply.
In his master’s place, huh? Do nobles really apologize that easily? Like, should
you be throwing his name around like that?
Maybe Balto just trusts this butler that much, or maybe it’s the influence of
the Demon Lord that’s making him apologize to me like this. Otherwise, the
butler’s just doing this of his own accord.
If that’s the case, couldn’t that get him in trouble?
Hmm. Well, I guess that’s not for me to worry about.
It was obviously Hooligan’s fault.
“I have no doubt that the master of the house will wish to apologize to you
personally quite soon. I shall do everything in my power to keep the young
master from approaching you and yours. I beg you to spare us of your fury if at
all possible.”
The head butler speaks quickly, his head still lowered.
I know he’s just covering for his employer, so I feel bad having him apologize
so much.
Letting go of Riel and Fiel, I pat them gently on the shoulders.
Picking up on my meaning, they relax and stop radiating all that violent
energy.
“Again, I deeply apologize for the intrusion. Please return to your relaxation at
your leisure.”
With that, the butler carefully pulls the door shut.
Well, that was a disaster, but supposedly I’ll never have to see that hooligan’s
ugly mug again, so whatever.
Or so I thought. But wouldn’t you know it, Hooligan keeps coming to see us
again and again after that.
It may have crossed my mind that we should just kill him, but let’s keep that
our little secret.
THE DEMON DUKE’S DISTRESS
Sleep, wake up, eat, make thread, eat, laze around, sleep.
Is this place heaven?
’Cause it’s everything I ever wanted!
“And what exactly have you been up to while I’ve been studying my fangs
off?”
Ah. Vampy has come, a vein bulging on her forehead, to ruin my perfect
paradise.
“Why don’t you study etiquette and such with me, since you clearly have
nothing better to do?”
Vampy smiles as she forcibly drags me out of the room.
Nooo!
I don’t wanna go to school!
This is kinda sad, though. I’m not even strong enough to pull myself away
from Vampy anymore.
Grrr! Will the loss of my stats ever stop ruining my life?!
Thus, I am forced to go along with Vampy.
By the way, if you’re wondering why the baby bloodsucker was able to enter
my room in the first place, it’s because right after that hooligan attacked my
room, she came and attacked me, too.
Yeah, I said it. She didn’t comfort me. She attacked me.
Sure, she came running when she heard the commotion, but her first
response was to smile like an evil executive and say, “Oh, good. Now I can come
in.”
Then she barged right into my room as if she’d been waiting for this moment,
stared me down, and told me, “I hope you’ve learned your lesson. Don’t you
dare block that door again.”
I guess this little girl wasn’t too happy about us holing up in my room.
I have to obey her, or she’ll kill me!
Riel and Fiel apparently feel the same way, since they’re clinging to my arms
and trembling.
A little girl who paralyzes the other little girls with fear.
Talk about terrifying…
Wait, aren’t Riel and Fiel stronger than Vampy?!
Why are YOU guys scared?!
But in that moment, our terror made us give in to Vampy’s threat.
Dammit! This wasn’t supposed to happen!
And now that our room is open to visitors, Vampy has started coming to
attack us whenever she has a chance.
Yeah, I said it. Not visit. Attack.
If she comes in the morning while we’re making thread, she interrupts our
work and gets in the way, and if she comes during our elegant afternoon
teatime, she steals all our snacks and cakes.
Without her guardian, Mera, around, she’s becoming a tyrant!
And now it’s come to this: forcibly abducting me.
Even my famously gentle personality can’t take much more of this, y’know?
But I’m keeping that to myself.
I’m sure Vampy is lonely, too.
She’s been separated from her beloved emotional support, Mera, not to
mention her mentor figure, the Demon Lord.
Our life together on the road was pretty lively, so I’m sure the stark contrast
of life here has made her lonely, which is why she’s lashing out like this.
Yep, that’s gotta be it.
But don’t worry. Your big sister here is super-kind and super-patient.
I can go along with a child’s selfish whims just fine!
Man, I’m so damn nice.
And thus, my and Vampy’s study-buddy adventure begins.
…Um, excuse me. Can I quit now? What? I can’t?
C’mooon! This suuuucks!
The regular lessons are one thing. The Demon Lord told us all kinds of things
on the journey, and sometimes we read books and studied and stuff, so I
understand most of what’s going on.
But the etiquette seminar? That’s no good!
What do you mean, the proper way to walk and eat and stuff?
Um, this is super-hard!
This must use different muscles from walking normally, ’cause I’m sore all
over the place!
And for table manners, you have to be careful about all kinds of crap while
you eat, so you can’t even enjoy the food properly! I don’t get to stuff myself to
my heart’s content like I used to!
If I’m not gonna get to eat that much during the day, I wanna at least savor
the flavors while I eat, but now I can’t even do that!
How do you ruin EATING?!
And then comes the horrible cherry on top—dance lessons!
Do I look like I can handle this level of intense exercise?
Are you trying to kill me?!
So by the time Vampy drags me back to my room, I’m a shell of my former
self.
If I had to do combat training and stuff on top of that, I might seriously die.
Luckily, Vampy’s private tutor gives up on me before the combat stuff gets
too far.
I wonder if I can convince the other teachers to give up on me, too?
Especially for the manners seminars.
By the way! If you ask me, manners are definitely what Vampy needs the
most.
Like me, Vampy has learned a lot of stuff from the Demon Lord already, so
she does all right with regular lessons, too.
There’s also the matter of our bonus knowledge from our prior lives, which
means Vampy’s brain is leaps and bounds ahead of the other kiddos her age.
The teacher was even raving that she’s a child prodigy.
But etiquette? Not so much.
We obviously never had to learn fancy-pants manners in our old world, and
the Demon Lord never bothered teaching us, since she’s not technically a noble,
either.
Mera occasionally gave the baby bloodsucker simple lectures about it when
he had the time, but that wasn’t super-in-depth. If anything, that vampire duo
was always more focused on combat training than etiquette.
Talk about violent.
So Vampy’s manners are age appropriate, or maybe even a little higher.
Noble kids get etiquette drilled into them from birth, I guess. Is that scary or
what?
Although I think it’s impressive that Vampy’s manners are almost as good as
the real noble kids who grew up with this stuff.
Me?
Well, I already look like I’m high school age!
The etiquette teacher took one look at me and said “Oh, dear me!” all right?!
She must’ve been thinking that it would be a treat to teach a student who
somehow hasn’t learned manners at this age!
Um, ’scuse me? I know I don’t look it, but I’m about the same age as Vampy,
y’know?
Don’t let my appearance fool you.
I’m just a cute little girl!
So go a little easier on me, please, and thank you.
But on top of these horrible daily etiquette lessons that leave me sore to the
bone, there are two other things that have been driving me up the wall.
One is that I’m not getting anywhere with my efforts to restore my power.
The other… Well, I guess it’s a person, not a thing.
“Yo.”
“Go away.”
It’s our old pal Hooligan, who gets a cold reception from Vampy every time he
arrives.
Yeah, that’s right.
For some reason, this stupid pyromaniac who I thought I’d never have to see
again has been showing up all the damn time.
Uh, Mr. Head Butler?
Didn’t you say you wouldn’t let this guy near me again?
But getting mad at the head butler would be barking up the wrong tree.
This damn hooligan is craftier than he looks, ’cause he’s been making a point
of showing up only whenever the head butler’s not around.
Since the head butler serves the head of the house, Balto, he has to go to the
Demon Lord’s castle from time to time.
Between being Balto’s assistant and running this place, the head butler is
extremely busy.
Hooligan takes advantage of that to come attack when we’re unprotected.
The rest of the staff doesn’t seem to be able to stop him, since he’s the
master of the house’s little brother and all, so the maids end up bringing him
here with apologetic looks on their faces.
See, this is exactly why you can’t give problem children any authority!
“Beat it. Brats should mind their own damn business.”
“Then perhaps you should mind your own business, too. Since you clearly
have the mind of a brat yourself.”
A cold breeze blows through the room out of nowhere.
And I don’t mean metaphorically. There’s seriously wind blowing in this room.
The magic power seeping out of Vampy and Hooligan, who have Ice and Fire
attributes respectively, clash against each other and form wind because of the
drastic temperature difference.
Since it’s so cold, that means Vampy’s power is probably beating Hooligan’s.
Cool.
By the way, it’s freezing in here, so could you cut it out?
Why has my precious teatime turned into a battlefield?
I don’t get it. I just don’t get it…
Well, if you don’t understand something, best to just leave it alone, right?
With that in mind, I sip my tea, which has gotten a little cold thanks to the
freezing air.
Riel and Fiel stuff their faces with tea cakes, ignoring Hooligan completely.
These guys are supposed to be my bodyguards, but Hooligan barges in so
damn often that they don’t even pay him any attention anymore.
Thanks a lot, guys.
And you, Hooligan. How does it feel to be glaring daggers at a little girl like
Vampy?
She definitely seems to hate his guts.
But from a neutral perspective, the sight of this tough guy and a tiny girl
staring each other down is pretty surreal.
Uh-oh. Now they’re cursing each other out?
I’ll leave the contents of their insults to your imagination.
Although frankly, it’s only because they’re being so juvenile, it doesn’t seem
worth relaying the details to you.
I guess they say fights break out only between people of around the same
level…
“Sael.” Getting heated, Vampy snaps Sael’s name.
Sael, who’s been sitting frozen with her cup in hand, stands up immediately.
Okay, stop! Time-out!
I order Sael to sit back down by way of a hand gesture.
Obediently, she sits back down.
Whew.
Listen, Vampy. I don’t care how worked up you are; you can’t use Sael for this.
She doesn’t understand jokes, okay?
If you tell her to attack, she really will kill him on the spot.
Whatever insane orders you give her in the heat of the moment, Sael will act
on them no matter what.
This is a handle-with-care warning, all right? You have to be super-careful
when you give Sael orders or else!
…And no, I’m not secretly thinking that it wouldn’t be so bad if she really did
kill Hooligan, since he’s super-annoying.
There is no part of me that thinks I could totally blame it on Vampy if it
happened like that.
Nope. Not even a little.
“Seriously, what did you even come here for?! Just leave already!”
“Shut up, dammit! I ain’t here to talk to you, that’s for sure! Besides, this is
my damn house!”
Ahhh, so peaceful.
Looking away from Vampy and Hooligan, I take a bite of a cake.
“And, you! Quit ignoring me, dammit!”
Geh! Now he’s turning on me?!
I don’t wanna deal with that, so I’ll just stare off into next week and pretend
not to hear him.
“Pffft! She doesn’t even want to look at your face, you see? How sad.”
“Urgh!”
Vampy grins triumphantly, which just makes Hooligan even angrier.
Why would Vampy be triumphant about that anyway?
More importantly, can’t Hooligan just go away already?
Seriously, he’s such a pain.
“I just came today to drop this crap off! See ya!”
Hooligan practically slams some kind of bottle down on the table, then
stomps away.
I guess he finally picked up on the fact that I really don’t want him here.
If he knows that, I wish he’d stop getting into it with Vampy every time.
Or more importantly, just don’t come here at all.
Unlike my private irritation, Vampy watches him go and huffs loudly.
Honestly, I wish you would stop picking fights with him, too.
It’s cold, literally.
“What is this anyway? Hmm? Liquor?”
Vampy’s attention quickly shifts from Hooligan to the bottle he left on the
table. She picks it up and squints at it suspiciously.
“Doesn’t seem to be poisoned. It’s just regular liquor.”
She must have investigated with Appraisal.
Why liquor, though?
C’mon, Hooligan, my dude. What kind of gift for a lady is that?
Oh, maybe it’s because my pal the Demon Lord is probably boozing it up all
the time in the Demon Lord’s castle?
Well, I don’t know if that’s true. But why else would he pick liquor as a gift?
He wouldn’t…right?
An alcoholic might be happy about a gift like this, but I’m a healthy,
wholesome child.
I’m healthy, okay? I just have a teeny bit of a weak constitution.
Well, I guess this probably just means that Hooligan is running out of gift
ideas.
At first, he brought bouquets of flowers.
Although Vampy froze those in ice and smashed them on the floor right away.
He’s brought a bunch of different presents after that, but it seems like all his
research has led him to conclude that food and drink are our favorites.
I mean, he’s not wrong.
Although I still think liquor is kind of a weird move.
“…Maybe just a little.”
For some reason, Vampy takes the lid off the bottle and sniffs the contents.
“Oof!”
That alone is enough to send her reeling.
Ah, right. Vampy really can’t handle her liquor.
During our travels, the Demon Lord bought alcohol by the barrel and drank it
on the regular.
We joined her sometimes, but Vampy wasn’t allowed to drink, since she was
an infant and all.
Although she still stole a few sips on occasion when the Demon Lord was
distracted.
But whenever she did manage to drink, she always passed out immediately.
I guess being extremely weak to alcohol might be in her genes.
According to Mera, Vampy’s mom also fell asleep whenever she had even the
smallest amount of alcohol, so she must have passed that down to her kid.
Judging by Vampy’s current reaction, she can’t even smell it safely.
Talk about wimpy.
Evidently realizing she can’t drink it, Vampy looks dissatisfied as she puts it
back on the table.
…Hmmmm.
Come to think of it, I guess I haven’t had any alcohol since my deification.
When I was an arachne, I used to drink along with the Demon Lord from time
to time, but after the deification stuff happened, she forbade me from drinking
because of my feeble state.
I believe she said something like, “Yeah, no, I don’t think White should drink
anymore.”
And yeah, I guess she wasn’t wrong.
The only reason I was able to handle my liquor so well as an arachne is
because I had those stats and resistance skills and stuff.
Without all that, my body is super-weak and unprotected.
So it makes sense to conclude that I shouldn’t be drinking in a state like that.
To be honest, even I’m sure that drinking now would totally make me sick!
But wait!
Doesn’t that mean I should rise to the challenge?!
If I live my life in fear forever, how will I ever move forward?!
Now is the time to take the first step!
In other words, what I’m saying is that I wanna drink alcohol again.
It’s human nature to want to try something when you’re told that you can’t.
Although I’m a spider, not a human.
My memories around drinking are kinda vague for some reason, but I do
remember being pretty happy when I did it.
And since the Demon Lord isn’t around to keep an eye on me, this is the
perfect chance to recapture that happiness buried deep in memories past,
right?
So c’mon—let’s give it a try!
Since I’ve finished the tea in my cup, I pour some liquor into it instead.
“You’re going to drink it? Take it slow, all right?”
Vampy stares at me reproachfully.
Those puppy-dog eyes aren’t going to stop me, little girl!
Fortunately, it appears that Riel and Fiel aren’t going to try, either.
In fact, they’re holding out their cups like they’re waiting for their turn.
All right, then. You guys can be my accomplices.
Yesss, come to the dark side. Heh-heh-heh.
I pour some liquor into Riel’s and Fiel’s cups.
Sael’s, too, although I don’t know if she’s actually gonna drink it.
The liquid in our cups looks like a dark red wine.
The aroma is definitely pretty strong, too.
Oh yeah. You could almost get drunk off the smell alone.
If you’re going to give a woman alcohol, shouldn’t you at least pick something
a little more drinkable?
That stupid Hooligan just doesn’t get it.
Well, whatever. Bottoms up!
We clink our cups together, then gulp them down.
Whew! That’s strong!
The taste and the alcohol content are both crazy intense!
Is it just me, or is this stuff meant for fancy connoisseurs?
My throat feels kinda weird, and my head is all spinny, and… Huh?
Hrmmm? Why’s Vampy moving back and forth like a metronome?
Huh?
Now THAT’s weird.
When did Vampy learn how to make the entire world wobble around like
that?
I didn’t even know that skill existed.
To cause a natural disaster like this, it must be some kinda super-advanced
earth magic or something!
“Stooop! Quit shaking it! You’re gonna break the world!”
“Huh? What are you talking about?”
“Waaaah! Stop iiiit!”
“What do you mean?! H-hey, are you all right?”
Obviously not! That’s why I’m telling you to stop!
I guess I have no choice but to stop you myself!
Hiyah!
“…?! I don’t know what’s going on, but this seems dangerous! Sael!”
For some reason, Sael comes flying at me.
I must admit, it’s impressive that she can move so freely in this wobbly space.
But no! I won’t let a tackle like that stop me!
Repulsion, activate!
“Huh?!”
My Repellent Evil Eye power blows Sael away as she tries to leap toward me.
At the same time, I stretch out my hands toward Riel and Fiel, who have been
trying to sneak up on me from either side.
Eat my Black Wave Motion Gun!
Waves of darkness pulse out of my hands, slamming Riel and Fiel into the
walls.
Bwa-ha-ha!
You’re a hundred years too early to defeat me!
Now that the three puppet spiders are incapacitated, I tie them up in thread
and hang them upside down from the ceiling.
While I’m at it, let’s get Vampy up there, too, since this is all her fault in the
first place!
“What the—?!”
Vampy dangles upside down in midair, her skirt flipped all the way upward.
She’s trying to hold it in place, but I can totally see her cutesy undies.
“Put me down! Put me down!”
Bwa-ha-ha!
Don’t even bother trying to freeze my thread with your magic.
My Antimagic Evil Eye will mess up your power before you can make a single
spell.
So why hasn’t the world stopped wobbling yet?
I can’t believe she just casually used a spell so powerful that it doesn’t stop
even if the caster is incapacitated!
“Stay up there for a while and think about what you’ve done!” I yell.
“What do you mean?! Why are you doing this to me?!”
Vampy’s shrieks of despair are music to my ears.
Something about her teary-eyed expression puts a grin on my face.
I kinda want to make her cry some more.
So I spin some thread around into a little feather-like shape.
“Huh? Wait! What are you going to do with that?! Stop! Nooo!”
Aaaand up the nose it goes.
“Eep! A-a-achoo! Achoo! Waaah…”
Okay, now it’s tickling time.
Coochie coochie coo.
“Eeeeek! Noooooo!”
Ah-ha-ha-ha-haaaa!
…Oof.
Ouch. Uuurgh…
Good morning.
Hoo, boy, my head hurts.
Water…
I make some thread to pull the pitcher of water over to my hand.
Ah, I don’t have a cup.
Oh well.
I pour some water out of the pitcher, then manipulate it in midair to carry it
to my mouth.
Whew. Muuuch better.
…Huh?
Hmm? Hmm? HMMMM?!
Excuse me?! What did I just do?!
I pulled the pitcher over with thread and moved water around in midair?
I try to do it again but then realize there’s no more water in the pitcher.
But that’s not important right now.
I turn my hand over.
As I stare into my palm, I can see what I’ve been trying to see all this time but
couldn’t until now: the movement of energy.
I manipulate it and form a rune.
Like the kind my magic skills used to make.
Once it’s fully formed, the rune summons a ball of darkness, just like I
pictured.
A floating mass of energy, around the size of a tennis ball.
I close my hand and crush it in my fingers.
A tiny explosion occurs inside my clenched fist.
But when I open my hand again, there’s not a single scratch.
Because I enhanced my defensive power and guarded against it.
“I’m back.”
Without thinking, I mutter aloud.
I’m finally back.
I don’t know what caused it exactly, but I can finally use my powers again!
I don’t think I can do things as freely as I was able to at the height of my
power, but it’s still a whole lot better than not being able to do anything at all.
Aaaaah! I did it!
Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo-hoooo!
I’m back! I’m baaaack!
I can feel it. I can feel the energy overflowing inside me!
And I can see it. I can use my Evil Eyes again, and I can see what I wasn’t able
to…see…before?
As I’m doing all this seeing, I notice the unconscious bodies all around me.
Vampy is hanging upside down with a very unladylike expression, and Sael,
Riel, and Fiel are dangling from the ceiling, too.
Huh? What the heck are you guys doing up there?
THE VAMPIRE PRINCESS’S MIDNIGHT
LESSON
Skill [Jealousy LV 10] has evolved into skill [Envy].> <Proficiency has reached the required
level.
Acquired skill [Taboo LV 1].>
<Proficiency has reached the required level.
Skill [Taboo LV 1] has become [Taboo LV 2].> <Condition satisfied.
Acquired title [Ruler of Envy].>
<Acquired skills [Divine Scales LV 10] [Root of Evil] as a result of Title [Ruler of Envy].>
Hmm? How very strange.
For some reason, I’ve lost some skill points, and my Jealousy skill turned into
Envy.
Oh dear. I suppose these things do happen.
…All right, I did it.
No, it’s not like that! It was just a little whim, that’s all!
I wonder what White and Miss Ariel would do if they knew I disobeyed their
instructions…
No, it’ll be fine.
Right now, I’m the only one who knows.
Then I remember that there’s someone else in the room.
Whirling around, I see Sael still crouching in the corner, staring at me with a
curious expression.
I-it’s fine.
Sael doesn’t know that I just acquired a skill, I’m sure.
It’s fine. It’ll be fine!
I don’t feel any of the mind-corrupting effects just yet that Miss Ariel
mentioned.
It might be the sort of thing that happens over time without one noticing, but
as long as I don’t overuse the Envy skill, I imagine nothing too terrible will
happen.
The effect of Jealousy is to disable a target’s skills.
And it can’t be blocked by resistance skills, either.
In other words, if I use Envy, I can make it so that my opponent can’t use their
skills.
Jealousy did the same thing, but now it can’t be resisted, and the limit on how
many skills I can disable appears to have been lifted.
Yes, this could definitely be a good trump card against that oni.
Its only really threatening skill was Wrath, so if I disable that skill, I’ll be able
to win for sure.
Besides, by gaining the Ruler of Envy title, I’ve gained two more skills, and my
stats have even increased a bit.
It doesn’t look like I can activate the Root of Evil skill, but the Divine Scales
skill is amazing!
When I try it out, it produces peculiar scales over my skin.
They’re incredibly hard to the touch.
And on top of enhancing my pure defensive skill, they even dampen the
effects of magic.
Now my physical and magical defense have both gone up at once.
Acid Attack for offense.
Divine Scales for defense.
Envy for debuffing.
They’ve all improved at once.
Heh-heh. Yes. This is perfect!
Now I can win!
The perfect form I imagined has become even more incredible in one fell
swoop!
If I just keep training without resting on my laurels, perhaps I’ll be able to beat
Ael sooner than I expected!
Heh-heh. Heh-heh-heh!
Just you wait!
For now, I’ll start by raising my Acid Attack skill level.
And I’ll try to keep the fact that I’ve acquired Envy a secret, if at all possible.
I’m sure I still can’t beat Miss Ariel or White, after all.
As I cackle to myself in the dead of night, Sael seems to look on in silence.
ARRIVAL AT THE GREAT ELROE LABYRINTH
Ever since the upside-down-girls incident, Vampy has been in a very bad
mood.
Well, I guess I can’t blame her. She gave me the whole story, and apparently, I
caused that whole debacle while I was drunk.
She tried to calm me down when I went on a drunken rampage, and instead I
went wild. If I were her, I’d get mad, too.
But I don’t know why that means she has to invade my room every chance
she gets.
Even now, while I’m testing out my abilities, she’s sitting there having a tea
party with Sael and company. Plus, since Vampy is the only one of them who
talks, that means their little tea parties consist of sipping tea in silence and
watching something.
Normally, their entertainment is Fiel goofing around when she gets bored of
the stuffy silence or Riel suddenly doing some bizarre activity.
Otherwise, they have to actually just sit there in boredom, or Vampy has to
start talking by herself.
But now, they have the exciting new option of observing ME.
And that’s exactly what they’ve been doing lately.
Four pairs of eyes stare at me expectantly, making it difficult to get anything
done.
But I do feel guilty for putting them through the upside-down incident, so I
can’t be rude to them about it.
So I just try to ignore them as best I can while I test out my abilities.
My powers finally returned to me when I got drunk.
…Yeah, I know that sounds pretty terrible, but I have to ignore it.
While my powers are back, that doesn’t mean I can use them exactly the
same way I did before.
I still don’t have skills or stats, after all.
What I’m doing now is basically just imitating those.
What exactly are skills and stats, you ask? Well, they’re part of a crazy-huge
act of conjuring called the “system.”
Most phenomena in this world that defy the laws of physics are actually
brought about using energy that works by entirely separate rules.
Artificially manipulating this energy is the basis of magic.
In a broader sense, that means that skills and stats are a kind of conjuring,
too.
The giant act of conjuring known as the system supports humans so that they
can easily harness said conjuring, in the forms of skills and stats.
When I underwent deification, I became exempt from the system, so I don’t
get the support of skills and stats anymore. That’s why I wasn’t able to use my
powers.
After all, that requires sensing and manipulating the energy that forms the
basis of all this, and I no longer have the Magic Power Perception or Magic
Power Operation skills that used to do that for me.
You have to use energy for conjuring, but I wasn’t able to see or feel that
energy, never mind know how to manipulate it, so I wasn’t getting anywhere.
But I was able to do it before, even if the skills were helping me.
I thought I might be able to get a sense for how I did that if only I had some
kind of chance.
Although I never thought that “chance” would consist of getting drunk.
If drinking was all I needed to do to get my powers back, then why did I suffer
so miserably for almost two years…?
Unreal.
Well, whatever. They’re back now, so there’s no point dwelling on the past.
Anyway, skills and stats support the residents of this world so that they can
perform conjuring more easily.
So if I can use conjuring now, that means I should be able to do all the same
things I did before, even without the support of skills…in theory, at least. In
practice, it’s not so easy.
It’s like the difference between riding a bike with training wheels and a bike
without them. Obviously, it’s gonna be hard at first.
I have to control the whole thing myself, without the support of skills.
For some reason, I can produce thread without really thinking about it, but for
everything else, I have to consciously produce the runes and such.
It’s not like using a skill, where you know how to do it right off the bat.
I have to figure out what the system’s support was doing when I used each
skill and control that part myself.
I guess it’s kinda like the difference between automatic and manual.
It’s pretty hard, though.
I mean, I can sorta remember the runes and stuff for skills I used relatively
often. But it’s more like I remember the feeling of using them than the detailed
steps.
I have to rely on vague feelings like, I dunno, was it kinda like this? which
actually seems to work more often than not.
I guess it’s sorta like muscle memory…or maybe soul memory?
Well, as long as I can use those, that’s fine with me.
The problem is the stuff I can’t use yet.
I don’t remember the skills I didn’t use as often, so it’s been tough to get
them to work.
There are some skills that I constantly had on by default in order to raise their
skill levels, but there’s plenty more that I never did that with.
At the moment, I have no idea how to re-create about half of those lesser-
used skills.
I do have a vague sense for most of them, so I think if I keep practicing, I’ll be
able to do it eventually.
But there are a few others that I can’t seem to use at all.
The biggest example being magic.
I can use Dark and Spatial Magic without a problem, but the rest of them are
tougher.
I know what you’re thinking. C’mon, conjuring and magic are basically the
same, so what’s the problem?
But listen, those are totally different.
In fact, magic is just one small part of the giant conjuring known as the
system.
D added some gamelike elements and fancy effects to give the impression of
“magic.”
It’s sort of like an illusion, except it actually affects reality.
Sure, that magic produces fire or water or whatever, but it’s not quite the
same as the regular kind of fire or water.
It has some stupid extra parts like attributes and resistances, for one thing.
In fact, most of it is superfluous stuff, to the point where the rune producing
the all-important fire, water, etc. is more like a bonus than anything…
Skills have attributes, and there are resistances that oppose them.
This is embedded in the gamelike system, which also creates affinities.
That’s why runes are so unnecessarily complicated.
So, since I know only the runes produced by my old skills, I don’t know which
parts of them are actually necessary for pure conjuring that’s not related to the
system.
When I try to reproduce those same runes, they’re inevitably connected to
the system—and since I’m cut off from the system, I can’t activate them.
Since all magic has these stupid “attributes” attached, that means I can’t use
most of it.
That goes for non-magic skills that have attributes, too.
Like Jinx Evil Eye, for instance. It has the Curse attribute, and it directly attacks
HP and MP and stuff, all of which are directly connected to the system.
If I want to re-create Jinx Evil Eye, it might be better just to build a new rune
from scratch.
Not that I have the know-how to do that!
On the other hand, there are two kinds of skills I can use even though they
have attributes: Dark and Rot.
But wait just a minute.
Okay, Dark is one thing.
I don’t know why I can use something that’s so obviously attribute-based, but
it’s useful, so I’m not gonna worry about that.
But what is Rot doing here?!
The Rot attribute was always a last resort among my many strategies.
Of course, when I did use it, it was very reliable.
But that’s only if I could use it properly.
’Cause the Rot attribute is a total double-edged sword!
It’s so damn strong that it causes recoil damage to the user. And that’s when I
had it under the control of skills thanks to the system!
What’s going to happen if I use it without any of those restraints?
I’m so scared that I don’t even dare test it out.
My giant scythe still seems to have that kind of attribute, so I thought maybe
I’d be able to use it all right, but that was a failure.
It started to activate without a problem, so I panicked and shut it off.
I still got a little recoil, since I stopped it so abruptly, but I’m sure it’s nothing
compared to what would happen if I actually activated it.
But warning bells were going off in my head so loudly in that moment that I’m
not sure I would’ve survived. Letting it activate all the way wouldn’t have led to
anything good.
It’d be one thing if it misfired and I lost an arm or something, but in the worst-
case scenario, I could’ve actually died.
That nasty evil god told me that I would’ve died from using it if I didn’t have
the resistance, and that was when I had skills.
Now that I don’t have that safety net, I have no idea what’ll happen.
So I’m going to be super-careful when it comes to the Rot attribute. Yeah.
And Rot’s not the only thing I have to be careful about.
I was able to handle everything easily with the help of skills, but now I have to
keep it under perfect control without any help.
I’ve got to handle everything with care, not just Rot, or I could easily make
something misfire at any moment.
So I’m keeping my practice relatively simple, not to mention sticking to stuff
that wouldn’t cause too much damage if it did go awry.
Right now, I’m working on seeing through stuff.
My eyes have a whole bunch of pupils, so I have to keep ’em closed when I’m
in town and stuff so I don’t freak out other people.
Obviously, I can’t see with my eyes shut, so it’s pretty damn inconvenient.
If I can learn to see through things like I used to with Clairvoyance, I can look
right through my eyelids at the outside world, so I won’t have to deal with all
that nonsense.
Plus, it wouldn’t do any real harm if I mess this up, so it’s perfect for
practicing in my room.
To an outside observer, it probably just looks like I’m sitting here with my
eyes closed, but for some reason, the peanut gallery seems to find this
interesting enough to keep watching me.
Even Fiel, who normally doesn’t have the patience for this kind of thing, is
staring at me.
It’s starting to stress me out, so I turn away from my audience of little girls.
Then Fiel silently sneaks around my side and waves her hand in front of my
face.
I can see you.
Even with my eyes closed, I can see you with Clairvoyance.
But if I react now, she’ll probably get carried away and distract me even more,
so I ignore her.
The speed of Fiel’s hand waving steadily increases, and soon she starts
moving the rest of her body, too, until finally she’s demonstrating some
bizarrely feverish dance in front of me.
Oh, come on! You got carried away anyway?!
It’s getting annoying, so I open my eyes and use Inert Evil Eye.
Fiel freezes in a shee! pose.
Okay. I wasn’t expecting the pose, but I guess it worked.
Inert Evil Eye originally evolved from Paralyzing Evil Eye. Since the latter has
the Paralysis attribute, I normally wouldn’t be able to use it, but Inert Evil Eye
has a sort of time-stopping effect.
I guess that effect is unrelated to Paralysis, which is why I’m able to use it.
That’s the only explanation I can think of anyway.
By the way, I can technically still use it even with my eyes closed.
If I combine it with the see-through effect of Clairvoyance, it still works, but
it’s less effective and harder to control.
I can activate several at the same time, too, but I don’t want to push it too
hard while I’m still learning the ropes.
Although I’m hoping that eventually I’ll be able to combine Evil Eyes with
Clairvoyance and do super-long-distance Evil Eye attacks like I could before.
But first, I have to figure out what I can and can’t do and practice hard to
improve.
…So? How long is Fiel going to stay frozen?
Oh? It won’t wear off until I stop it?
How exactly do I do that?
After that, I struggled for a while until I finally managed to release Fiel from
her inert state.
Yep. It’s important to understand how these powers work.
That was definitely a good reminder.
So I’ve been testing out my powers pretty successfully, and guess where I am
now? The Great Elroe Labyrinth.
Why? Because I teleported here.
It’s not like I actually wanted to come here even a little bit, but when I was
trying to decide where to go to test out teleporting, it was the first place that
came to mind.
And as soon as I thought about it, I found myself here.
I teleported so naturally, it’s almost shocking, if I do say so myself.
Just like when I make thread, I don’t even have to think about constructing
runes or anything like that. What’s up with that?
Isn’t teleporting, like, a super-advanced skill?
Well, I guess I did use it all the time.
It was literally my lifeline, y’know?
But I didn’t think it was going to be this easy to use it.
The Spatial Magic skill was always pretty hard, since you had to designate a
destination and use it as a starting point while activating Teleport.
The farther away the destination, the longer it takes to designate it.
And it takes a pretty long time before you can actually teleport there, too.
Again, with an even longer waiting period for faraway places.
In other words, it always took a crazy-long amount of time to activate
Teleport.
Even with my cheat skill Height of Occultism, Teleport took anywhere from
seconds to even minutes to prepare, depending on the distance.
But when I teleported just now, all I had to do was think about a place, and I
found myself there right away.
Seriously, what the hell?
I don’t get it. Why would it be faster to do this without the support of skills?
Hmm? Did the skill actually kinda slow me down?
Skills are essentially a form of assistance that activate conjuring for you.
They’re a structure that makes it easy and safe to produce runes.
But it’s trickier than it seems: It also means that the system itself is doing the
dangerous part of the work in place of the user.
But what if the system was slower at constructing that part than the user?
Then it might actually be faster to do it without the assistance of the system.
But is such a thing even possible?
I can kind of understand it with the thread, since I’ve been using it nonstop
since I was reborn here.
But why would I be able to use an advanced technique like Teleport faster
than when I had the system’s help?
Hrmmm.
I mean, it’s obvious that I must be some kind of genius, but still.
I guess there’s no point in dwelling on something I can do when I should really
be focusing on the things I still can’t.
I’ll just try to be grateful that I was able to do it more easily than I expected.
So anyway.
Here I am in the Upper Stratum of the Great Elroe Labyrinth.
Specifically, I’m in that big space on the border with the Middle Stratum.
I called this area home for a long time, so it makes sense that it’d be deeply
ingrained in my mind.
After all, this is the first place I thought of when I tried to teleport.
And now, a swarm of white spiders is clamoring around my former home.
So I’m surrounded, so what?
Sure, I might be screaming EEEEEK! on the inside, but it doesn’t look like these
guys are going to attack me.
On the contrary, they actually seem happy to see me.
They’re showing their joy by bouncing up and down, almost like they’re
dancing.
Huh.
Teleporting here to find myself surrounded by spiders dredged up some
unpleasant memories, so I panicked at first, but I guess I don’t mind as long as
they don’t attack me.
Being surrounded by spiders reminded me of the first thing I saw in this
world, the bloodbath of my spider siblings. I wasn’t exactly looking to relive my
first traumatic experience here.
By the way, my second traumatic experience was seeing Mother right after
that.
The third was when my home got destroyed, and the fourth was Mr. Araba.
What’s this? When I look back on it, it kinda seems like I’ve had a lot of
traumatic incidents in my life, no?
Oh, but I’ve conquered most of those fears by now.
Trauma’s nothing to be scared of!
What? My legs are trembling?
Th-that’s just because I’m so excited!
I’m definitely not shaking because this situation brought back traumatic
memories!
I’m not, okay?!
…Fine, so what if I am?! Everyone shakes a little once in a while!
Besides, the moment I was reborn wasn’t the only time I’ve been surrounded
by spiders, remember?!
There was also the time I got chased around by Mother right after I escaped
the labyrinth, barely managed to escape with my life via Teleport, and then
found myself surrounded by an army of spiders and almost got squashed!
You can’t blame me if I’m a little traumatized!
I really thought I was gonna die at the time!
But there’s no reason to be afraid now.
’Cause it occurs to me that the white spiders around me are actually kind of
my family.
Or family that was created by my Parallel Minds anyway.
These are the extra underlings my Parallel Minds made with the Egg-Laying
skill while they were temporarily separated from me.
But when I got deified, I absorbed all my Parallel Minds, so they really are my
family now, aren’t they?
In fact, if my Parallel Minds laid these eggs, doesn’t that mean I’m their
mother by blood?
Hey, Demon Lord, you’re a great-grandma nooow!
Once I dealt with those Parallel Minds, I just shoved these guys in here and
left them to their own devices. They were simply obeying my Parallel Minds, so
I couldn’t bring myself to kill ’em.
But I wasn’t gonna start looking after them, either.
Which is why I just teleported the lot of them into the Great Elroe Labyrinth
and left ’em here.
I didn’t know what had happened to them after that, but from the looks of
things, they’ve been getting on just fine.
Good, good.
Okay, your mom’s going home now, so keep up the good woooork.
Child neglect? No, that definitely doesn’t apply in this situation.
But the white spiders seem to sense somehow that I’m getting ready to
teleport away, because they suddenly freeze.
All that happiness dissipates at once, and suddenly they’re looking like a
bunch of abandoned puppies.
I guess in a way, that expression is accurate. Although they’re spiders, not
puppies.
Still, those eight eyes of theirs somehow look tearful to me.
Cut it out!
Don’t look at me like that!
You’re making it hard for me to leave!
In the end, I wound up staying over for the next several days…
It’s all because of those cute little eyes!
But I guess it’s fine, since I’ve managed to do some good experimenting in the
process.
The Great Elroe Labyrinth works pretty well as a space where you can use
dangerous techniques without inconveniencing anyone.
As a result, I’ve been able to figure out some things I couldn’t do in the duke’s
mansion.
This has been a pretty productive span of time.
The white spiders keep presenting me with monster corpses, but…I guess
that’s sorta cute.
Although now that I’m a human, monster meat doesn’t really suit my tastes
anymore.
Well. Y’know. Since they insist on offering them to me, I’m doing my best to
eat them, but I’ve got a pretty small stomach these days, so I can’t eat a whole
monster in one sitting anymore.
But I don’t like to waste food, so I’m doing my best…
I have occasionally been pretending to eat while storing it in subspace, but
that’s our little secret.
These guys just keep bringing me way more food than I can eat!
Since I’ve been away for so long, they seem excited to be able to serve me
devotedly.
Who raised them like this anyway? It’s a mystery.
In the end, I had to pull myself away from the white spiders as their eyes
begged me not to go and return to the duke’s mansion with Teleport.
The whole thing was a little painful for my heart, so I guess I’ll check in on
them from time to time.
“Where were you?”
Besides, there’s a scary little girl here, glaring at me like a wife who’s accusing
her husband of cheating.
I can’t spend all my time in a house with a scary girl like this!
I have another family who’s actually happy to see me!
“Don’t go wandering off on your own like that. Understood?”
…Yes, ma’am.
In the end, I couldn’t stand up to the anger of Vampy.
From now on, I’ll have to get her permission before spending the night
elsewhere.
ICE DRAGON NIA
Skill [Rage LV 10] has evolved into skill [Wrath].> <Proficiency has reached the required
level.
<Acquired skills [Battle Divinity LV 10] [Enma] as a result of Title [Ruler of Wrath].> When
I think about it now, I can speculate that Raza-Raza was acting that way only
because Buirimus’s control over him had proceeded so far, and that surely he
wouldn’t have wanted to do that if he was still in his right mind.
But at the time, I was too enraged to think about things that deeply.
The anger that built up inside me like scorching red heat burned everything
else away, threatening to singe even my own body.
At the same time, the monster tamer’s binding spell that constricted me
burned away, too.
Ahhh. I’m free.
Now he can’t stop me any longer.
I used the entirety of my strength to create a weapon with as much sheer
destructive power as I could muster.
It created a terrifying flame sword, as if shaped by the ugly thoughts within
me.
Without a moment’s hesitation, I brought it down hard on the shameless
traitor.
Unable to react in time, the one I had once called brother was slashed to
pieces and swallowed by an explosion of flames.
I turned to cut down Buirimus next, but as I should have expected, he had
already moved away from me.
The other men trampled over to surround me.
Buirimus began to summon a new monster.
As if it mattered.
I don’t care if I die in the process.
These men will know my rage.
And soon…
“So this is the justice I have reaped…”
I looked down on Buirimus in his final moments of life.
He and I were the only two left alive in this place.
I had killed all the others.
The enemy had far more military strength on their side. But I made up for that
with Wrath, Battle Divinity, and, most of all, my unique ability to completely
heal when I level up.
And killing even a few of the enemy was enough to raise my level, probably
because it was so low to start with.
I used my HP, MP, and SP to the brink of death, then recovered by leveling up.
Then I fought until I was near death again and repeated the process.
It helped that at first, they had been holding back so as not to kill me.
My Weapon Creation skill was very valuable to them.
They couldn’t afford to just get rid of that.
Their intentions had been very clear as they attempted to incapacitate me in
battle rather than try to kill me.
And I had used that to my full advantage.
“How humiliating.”
Buirimus, the final survivor, was strong.
Both as a summoner and as a warrior.
He was far superior to any of the others in pure strength alone.
But now he was lying on the ground weeping.
“Do you…hate me?”
I didn’t answer Buirimus’s question.
Not because I couldn’t. I had picked up their language during my time as
Buirimus’s slave.
But there was no point in answering.
Instead, I simply brought down the sword that I’d held above my head.
“Forgive me.”
With that, Buirimus breathed his last.
His final words were heavy with tenacity, as if he still stubbornly clung to life.
He must have had something he desperately wanted to do, even if it meant
eradicating us goblins in the process.
He got what he deserved.
And yet, my heart still weighed heavily on me.
I felt a terrible sense of loss and helplessness.
And a lingering rage that burned beneath it all.
I pulled the Appraisal Stone off Buirimus’s body and used it to Appraise
myself.
There, I read the words <Evolution Available>.
I had two options: <High Goblin> and <Oni>.
I made my choice.
At the same time, I used the Naming skill to change my own name to a new
one: Wrath.
Goblins take great pride in their names.
I had mostly used my Naming skill to give names to the weapons I made with
Weapon Creation, which increased the weapons’ performance. But I could also
use it to change a goblin’s name, which would increase their stats.
However, no goblin ever accepted that.
That’s how much importance goblins place on their names.
Goblins’ names are always the same two syllables repeated, after the name of
a legendary goblin who had fought and died bravely in battle.
Like Raza-Raza or Razu-Razu.
Razu-Razu was my old name.
But I no longer had any right to call myself a goblin.
My pride and my prayers had all been overwritten by this rage of mine.
So I couldn’t be a goblin anymore.
Now, I would be an ogre.
A simple ogre, controlled by nothing but wrath.
I howled to the heavens until the evolution process made me lose
consciousness.
The scene changes again.
I ceased to be a goblin, lost my friends and family, and now even the target of
my revenge was gone.
To be honest, I had lost any reason to live.
But I kept living anyway.
I didn’t want to stay in the village where Buirimus had enslaved me, but now
that I was no longer a goblin, it didn’t feel right to go back to a goblin village. So
by process of elimination, I took the path that went away from the Mystic
Mountains.
The path led to land controlled by humans, and now that I had evolved into
an ogre, adventurers attacked me with no questions asked.
I kept turning the tables on them and winning, until eventually a large-scale
group of adventurers attacked me all at once.
But I staved them off with traps and magic swords I had prepared in advance.
I had lost sight of the meaning of being alive, but I kept fighting and surviving
anyway, driven by the anger and stubbornness incurred in me by Wrath.
Then, after I defeated the group of adventurers, my next challengers were
what appeared to be an official army. The old knight and old mage who led the
army got the upper hand over me, and I was forced to flee.
As I ran away, a mysterious man inflicted the status conditions Fear and
Illusion on me, and I ran around driven half-mad.
Next thing I knew, I was right back in the village where Buirimus had kept me.
I obliterated the troops who were evidently waiting there to ambush me, and
only then did the truth finally hit me.
I didn’t want to fight anymore. There was no reason to.
Ridiculous, I know.
I had gone on fighting for so long, propelled by rage and stubbornness,
without even realizing that.
Then, completely exhausted, I cast all sense of shame and honor aside and
tried to go back to the old goblin village. It would be deserted now, with no one
else left, but I thought I could try to live there alone in secret.
But on the way there, I lost sight of my goal again.
Wrath had eroded my mind so completely that my thoughts were pulled back
toward fighting.
I attacked the monsters that lived in the Mystic Mountains and completely
forgot that I was originally there to return to the goblin village.
Then an incredibly strong dragon showed pity on me.
Ah, but wasn’t it actually telling me to die, in a roundabout way?
After that, I fought a little girl who had six limbs, and then a different girl who
was small but ridiculously threatening, and a man who was powerful despite his
pale-looking face.
And for some reason, Wakaba, my classmate from my previous life, was
there, too.
Around this time, I started to find my own memories a little weird and
suspicious.
In a world with things like stats, it isn’t that unthinkable for a little girl to be
strong.
And having six arms could probably be explained by some item or something.
But Wakaba showing up? That can’t have been real.
It must have been a dream or a hallucination.
And after that, the reality of things got even less clear. The rest must have
been a dream or something.
I fought the monsters of the Mystic Mountains.
And a very, very strong old swordsman.
And then the dragon who had pitied me before stood in my way.
Lastly, I faced the girl with two arms and Wakaba.
…Okay, I guess girl with two arms sounds normal enough.
Maybe all this dreaming has gotten my mind jumbled up.
Huh? A dream?
For some reason, I was flying through the sky.
Not soaring freely, like a bird.
No, it was more like I was falling, not flying.
The ground got closer to me by the second.
I felt the terror that I was about to hit bottom.
And sure enough, my body crashed into the ground with a dull thud.
It felt like my body had been battered and broken.
If this was really a dream, aren’t you supposed to wake up right before you
actually hit the ground?
Wait, what? A dream?
That’s right.
This is all just a dream.
A long, long, terrible dream.
“Huh?!”
I wake up with a start.
Is it normal in a dream to hit the ground without waking up, realize that this
must be a dream, and only then wake up for real?
I feel awful.
My entire body is drenched in sweat.
But I didn’t sit up sharply when I awoke.
Or rather, I couldn’t, really.
“Huh? What’s going on?”
My body won’t move, even if I put all my effort into sitting up.
Confused, I look around, trying to figure out what is going on.
Luckily, I’m at least able to turn my head, so I can take in my surroundings.
It looks like I’m lying in a bed.
I’m covered by a blanket, so I can’t tell what state my body is in. But it
definitely feels like I’m being restrained by something.
Next, I look around the room.
It’s a big room, much more impressive than the tumble-down house in the
goblin village or even the one in Buirimus’s village.
Is this a royal palace or something?
My confusion only deepens as I try to figure out why I would be lying in a
room like this.
Then I lock eyes with a little girl sitting near my bed.
Her almost artificial-looking eyes seem to pierce right through me.
For some reason, she reminds me of the girl with six arms.
Wait a minute.
Girl with six arms?
No, that must have been a dream, right?
There couldn’t possibly be a girl with six arms in reality.
I’m having trouble figuring out which parts of those memories are a dream
and which parts are real.
As I think about it, I realize that I have absolutely no idea how in the world I
wound up in this fancy room. My most recent memories are hazy, like the
moments between dreams and reality, and no use to me at all.
What happened, and why, and how did I get here?
“Uhhh…good morning?”
In my confusion, the only words I manage to muster sound stupid even to me.
But what else am I supposed to say?
In response, the little girl nods silently.
Then she picks up a bell lying next to the bed and rings it rhythmically.
Is that supposed to call a butler or something?
I saw that kind of thing in foreign films in my old life, but I’ve never actually
seen one used in reality before.
Still, the sound this girl is producing with the bell is so unsteady that just
hearing it is kind of stress-inducing.
In a way, it’s almost impressive that she can display her lack of a musical ear
so clearly just by ringing a simple bell.
Maybe that’s a talent in its own right.
Not that I want to keep hearing it, though.
“Riel! Quit making that disturbing noise before it drives us all completely
mad!”
The door flies open without so much as a knock.
There stands the girl with the two arms.
…Seriously, why do I keep thinking of her that way?
Oh, whatever. More importantly, I guess this means that the girl who
appeared in what I thought was a dream has now shown up in reality.
So does that mean it wasn’t a dream?
“Oh? So you’re awake.”
The girl has two other little girls behind her.
I recognize one of them as the girl with six arms.
Although as far as I can tell, she only has two arms now.
“My dear Sophia, it’s not very polite to barge into a gentleman’s room
without knocking. What will society think of you as a lady if you do such things?
We’re going to have to double down on your manners lessons.”
Another damn girl…
Starting to get a little irritated, I look at the new arrival.
Immediately, an indescribable chill runs through me.
“Huh?! What the—?!”
She looks like an ordinary enough girl.
A little older than the others, maybe, but still only in her mid to late teens at
best.
But for some reason, that girl has the presence of an absolute monster.
Just looking at her makes my pulse run wild.
“Oh-ho-ho. You’ve got some promise if you can tell how strong I am without
Appraisal, kid!”
The girl’s carefree smile somehow looks like that of a vicious predator.
My every instinct tells my body to run, but I seem to be tied down at the
moment, so I can’t escape.
“Hmph!”
“Guh?!”
Suddenly, I’m thrown to the floor.
“You’ve got some nerve to ignore me!”
As the blanket gets dragged along with me, the culprit who tossed me onto
the floor stands haughtily above me.
Judging by the conversation they were having before, this girl must be Sophia.
She’s pretty obnoxious compared to the other little girls, who are standing by
quietly.
“Oh, Sophia…”
“Well, he ignored me, all right, Miss Ariel? Me! You think I’d let him get away
with just staring at you the whole time without even a glance at me? Of course
not. Never!”
“…Well, I guess Envy is already affecting you a little. Oof. Can you just calm
down for a second? I’m trying to have a conversation here.”
The girl Sophia called Miss Ariel glares at her blandly.
In response, Sophia twitches and obediently falls silent. This Ariel must be the
strongest person here.
“Now then, let’s chat. Can you talk?”
I can’t exactly deny it now.
The pressure she’s exerting on me makes it difficult to open my mouth, so I
just nod silently.
“Oh yeah? Glad to hear it. Guess we’ve cleared the first hurdle, then.
Congrats on regaining control of your senses, by the way. And since you seem
to understand human language, I’d say we’ve cleared the second hurdle, too.”
Miss Ariel smiles cheerfully.
I don’t exactly follow everything she’s saying, but it doesn’t seem like it’s
anything bad for me.
“Well, it’d probably be tough to have a conversation like this, so let’s just…
Ah, White’s not here, so we can’t actually release you.”
Ariel comes over to me on the floor and touches the thread tying me up. It
seems extremely thin, but it’s been wrapped around in many layers, so I’m like
a caterpillar in a cocoon.
No wonder I can’t move.
“Yep, no can do. Thread Control isn’t working on it. I don’t think I can pull it
off, either, and burning it would be way too dangerous, so that’s out, too. I’m
sure White can undo it once she gets back. But she went off somewhere and
hasn’t returned yet, yeah?”
“Right. She just disappeared without a word, even though I’ve told her to let
me know where she’s going at times like these. How dare she leave me
behind!”
Sophia’s voice has a hysterical pitch to it.
“Uh-huh. Right. We’re gonna have to do something about this soon, aren’t
we? Merazophis, could you hold Sophia’s hand for now or something?”
“Of course, madam.”
A man steps forward quietly, startling me immensely.
How long has he been in the room?! I didn’t even notice him at all.
Maybe it’s partly because the other people here have a very intense
presence, but still, it’s crazy that I didn’t sense him even a little.
“Your hand, if you please, young miss.”
The man called Merazophis holds out his hand, and Sophia obediently takes
it.
Not only that, she wraps both her hands around his and even presses closer
to rub her cheek against it.
It kind of reminds me of a cat rubbing up against its owner, but I’m just gonna
keep that to myself, since I don’t know what would happen if I said it out loud.
“Sorry, but unfortunately, it doesn’t look like we can untie you right now.
Hope you don’t mind if we just talk like this for the time being.”
As she speaks, Miss Ariel hefts me up off the floor and puts me back in the
bed. She even pulls the blankets back over me.
“Thank you very much.”
For some reason, when I thank her, her eyes widen in surprise.
“Erm, what is it?”
“Oh, uh, nothing. I just wasn’t expecting you to be so polite, that’s all.”
Clearing her throat with a cute little “ahem,” Ariel continues. “Anyway, let’s
start with introductions. I’m Ariel. The one in lovey-dovey mode over there is
Sophia, and the guy she’s clinging to is Merazophis. From the left, these kids are
Sael, Riel, and Fiel. There’s also White and Ael, but they’re not here at the
moment, so hopefully you’ll have a chance to meet them some other time. In
fact, we need White to untie you, so we’ll be in trouble if you don’t meet her.”
It’s so many introductions at once that I’m worried about whether I’ll be able
to remember them all, but with a lineup this crazy, I’m pretty sure it’ll stick with
me.
Except maybe Sael, Riel, and Fiel, whose names are confusingly similar. Are
they sisters, maybe? They certainly look alike, in that they all seem like dolls.
“My name is Wrath.”
When people introduce themselves to you, it’s only polite to introduce
yourself in return.
My name now is Wrath.
I don’t have the right to call myself Kyouya Sasajima or Razu-Razu anymore.
“Okay. So let me cut to the chase here. How much do you remember?”
“How much…?”
I can’t immediately come up with an answer.
As I’ve been realizing since I woke up, my memories take on a dreamlike,
unreal quality at some point when I think back.
I don’t know how much of it is real and how much is my imagination.
Then again, since Sophia and the other girls who I thought were a dream are
standing right in front of me now, maybe all of it was actually real.
I don’t know.
“I’m not sure.”
When I respond honestly, Sophia glares at me menacingly.
“Sophia! Down, girl!”
Before Sophia can say anything, Ariel scolds her, so she promptly stops glaring
at me and clings sulkily to Merazophis instead.
“Sorry we keep getting so rudely interrupted. So yeah, I’m sure you’re already
aware of this, but you’ve been on a rampage because you lost your sanity
thanks to the Wrath skill. I can tell you what we observed of your actions in that
time, so try to figure out which parts you remember.”
Ariel goes on to tell me the history of my actions thus far.
I caused an uproar in a place called “the empire,” where they referred to me
as a “unique ogre.”
I was chased out by the imperial army, ran into a troop of elves, and wiped
them out.
I still remember all of that.
Although this is the first time I’m hearing that the troops I thought were
waiting to ambush me after I fled from the old knight and mage were actually
unrelated and were also elves.
After that, I fought Sophia and the others in the Mystic Mountains.
Then, after various twists and turns, I fought Sophia again, this time with a
person called White, who’s not currently present.
They soundly defeated me this time around, deactivated my Wrath skill to
bring me back to my senses, and now I’m here…apparently.
It’s all a little hazy, but I do remember it.
“Huh. So you haven’t completely forgotten everything.”
“In that case, you should let me punch you once! I haven’t forgiven you for
what you did to us, you know!”
Sophia sticks close to Merazophis as she yells at me.
I guess if all this is true, I did suddenly attack her and her friends without any
provocation.
And on top of that, they nearly died because of it.
I would have no right to complain if she killed me, never mind just one punch.
“Down, Sophia!”
“It’s all right, Miss Ariel,” I say meekly. “I deserve it for everything I’ve done.”
But Ariel is still having none of it. “Yeah, no. If she punched you, you’d
probably die.”
…I guess if what Miss Ariel said really did happen, then Sophia was holding
her own against me while I had Wrath activated.
The stat boost from Wrath is probably the only reason I was able to fight her
then, so now that it’s deactivated, I guess I might actually die if I took a direct
hit from Sophia.
In fact, if Ariel is being so serious about it, I definitely would.
“So that’s a no on the punching, Sophia. Merazophis, go on and give her a
hug.”
Sophia starts to protest until that last part of Ariel’s statement, which sets her
face aglow.
On the other hand, now it’s Merazophis who looks like he wants to protest.
But instead he gives up and leans down to silently give Sophia a stiff embrace.
…Seems like these guys have a pretty complicated relationship.
“Uh, so anyway, where were we? Oh, right! We were saying that you
remember stuff at least a little. So does that mean you remember what White
looks like?”
At that, it finally comes back to me.
The girl who was with Sophia during that fight.
But… Wait, what? Hang on a second.
If these memories are correct, does that mean it was real?
“Wakaba?” I ask hesitantly.
“Ding-ding-ding! We have a winner!”
Miss Ariel’s confirmation shocks me in all kinds of ways.
It’s so shocking that I don’t even know what I’m the most surprised about.
“So if White’s testimony is correct, does that mean you’re Kyouya Sasajima?”
I nod dumbly. At this point, I’m so shocked that it’s come back around to a
sort of calm numbness.
“Great. Then you should probably know that all your former classmates have
been reincarnated into this world. Although I haven’t actually seen all of them
with my own eyes, so I guess this is technically just hearsay.”
Despite the disclaimer, Ariel seems confident that this information is true. It
must have come from a pretty trustworthy source, then.
“And little Sophia here is—”
“Miss Ariel!”
“What? He’s gonna find out eventually, so better to just get it over with,
right? Sophia is a reincarnation whose name in your world was Shouko Negishi.”
Despite Sophia’s protests, Ariel reveals her secret.
Shouko Negishi.
I remember her, of course.
But this person seems quite a bit different from the old Negishi.
“Waaah!”
Sophia latches on closer to Merazophis, glaring at me resentfully.
I’m not sure why she’s looking at me like that when it was Miss Ariel who
revealed her identity, not me.
“But please don’t bother asking me about the other reincarnations besides
Sophia and White. I don’t know anything. Oh, there is one thing about the elves
we mentioned before, though. Seems like they’re real interested in the
reincarnations. They’ve even come after Sophia a few times. So they might have
more information on the other reincarnations, but I can’t say I recommend
getting mixed up with them.”
“Oh. I see.” I was hoping she might know something about Shun or Kanata,
but I guess it won’t be that easy. “Um, may I ask one question?”
“Mm? What’s up?”
“Do you know why we’re in this world?”
It comes out like an abstract philosophical question, but luckily Miss Ariel
seems to understand what I’m getting at.
“I guess you could say it was on the whim of a god.”
We are alive.
There’s never going to be a clear reason for that.
At least, that’s what I got the feeling she was telling me.
After that, Miss Ariel tried to keep talking with me, but Sophia finally lost
control and started raising a fuss, so Ariel wordlessly grabbed her by the scruff
of the neck and dragged her out of the room. Flustered, Merazophis quickly
followed them.
After a little while, Ariel comes back alone.
I decide it’s better not to ask what happened.
“I’m sure you’ve got a lot of thoughts to sort out, so let’s call it a day for now.
You can stay here as long as you like, so give some thought to what you want to
do next, too. Oh, and…” Ariel pauses. “If you want to know about this world,
maybe you should ask Taboo.”
With that, Ariel leaves the room.
The only other person who remains is Riel, who’s been in the room from the
beginning.
She’s acting like I’m not here or something and keeps occasionally waving at
an empty space in the room.
Is something there? I certainly don’t see anything…
Anyway… Taboo, huh?
With all the leveling up and evolving I’ve been doing, my Taboo skill maxed
out somewhere along the way.
Like Miss Ariel said, I can get an idea of what’s going on with this world from
Taboo.
I should probably take some time to look over its contents in detail.
…Although I get the feeling I don’t necessarily want to know.
But still, I have to look anyway.
It’s about the world that I’m living in now, after all.
Living… Hmm.
If I’m thinking about things like that, I guess that means I still have the will to
live, huh?
Ever since I killed Buirimus, I’ve been living solely out of stubbornness.
And that stubbornness led me to kill many innocent people along the way.
Ariel told me about my actions from a neutral observer’s perspective.
They certainly seemed like the actions of a monster.
Rampaging about in anger, disrupting the lives of innocent people and killing
them.
It’s unfair.
For the people I killed, nothing could be more unfair.
I committed the exact kind of injustice that I always hated more than anything
else.
I’m horrible.
So do I really have any right to live?
Do I still want to live, bearing the weight of those sins, having lost sight of any
purpose?
I don’t know.
But I don’t think I want to die, either.
“Hey, buddy. How ya feeling?”
The next day, Ariel comes to visit me again, alone this time.
Maybe she figured we wouldn’t be able to get anywhere with Sophia around.
“Sorry. We still don’t know where White is, so I guess you’re gonna be stuck
like that for a little longer. Hang in there, okay?”
Ariel looks deeply apologetic.
I tried a few things myself over the last day to see if I could get out, but
nothing worked.
What in the world is this thread made out of? It’s incredibly strong.
Still, while it’s inconvenient to be stuck like this, it hasn’t been that big of a
problem thanks to Ariel kindly taking care of me.
As long as you don’t count the embarrassment of being cared for by someone
who looks like a little girl.
Or saying “Ahhh” and being spoon-fed by the same little girl.
…Okay, maybe this is a big problem.
“Hrmmm. I mean, it should be weak to fire, so I guess we might be able to
burn it off somehow…”
“I’d appreciate that.”
“But it’d still take a considerable amount of firepower, so you’ll probably get
burned, too.”
“Still, I’d appreciate it, please.”
Giving in to my insistent request, Ariel burns the thread away, releasing me.
I sustain some fairly severe burns in the process, but I have HP Auto-Recovery,
so that’ll heal eventually.
It’s still better than being humiliated like that any longer.
“Thank you very much. I feel like I’ve finally been set free.”
“No problem. I’m, uh, sorry about that.” Ariel must’ve been able to tell how
relieved I was, though there was no need for her to apologize. “So now that
you’re free and all, whatcha wanna do next?”
“What do I want…?”
“Sure. If it’s something I can help with, I don’t mind lending you a hand. You
can also just stay here if you want. And if you’re not sure yet, you’re welcome
to hang around until you figure it out. You don’t need to pay or anything.”
“Why would you do all this for me?”
Ariel is being far too kind to me.
Especially considering that I could’ve killed her friends.
“Oh, I dunno. Half out of sympathy, half out of self-interest, I guess,” she
replies indifferently. “The first half’s because I’ve got an inkling of some of the
stuff you’ve been through, so I feel for ya, enough to understand why you
wound up with the Wrath skill. And the second half is because being nice to
reincarnations won’t displease a certain god, I guess. Maybe I’ll even gain a little
favor for it, although I’m not holding my breath.”
She knows what I’ve been through and feels sympathy for me?
I’m not sure how much Ariel knows about me, but I certainly never talked
about what’s happened to me in the past. So it’s unclear how much of her
information is true, but whatever it is, I guess it was enough to elicit some
sympathy.
Huh. So I guess what I’ve been through warrants being pitied by others.
For some reason, I feel detached from this realization.
And then there’s the self-interest part.
If she’s good to reincarnations, then a god might be good to her.
When I asked her yesterday about why we wound up in this world, Ariel
answered that it was the whim of a god.
I thought that might have some deeper meaning to it, but I guess it must have
been literal.
Gods really do exist in this world, after all.
Literal, genuine gods who created this system.
So it makes perfect sense that we would be living in this world thanks to a
whim of that god.
And evidently, that same god has taken a liking to us reincarnations.
Which is why Ariel says she’s being kind to us.
I guess that logic is fairly self-serving.
“To be honest, I don’t know what I want to do just yet.”
I’ve already lost any meaning my life once had.
I don’t have any desires or ambitions.
I’m an empty shell, filled with nothing but the sins I’ve committed.
“Miss Ariel…”
But I’m still living.
I still don’t consider dying an option.
“Is there anything I can do for this world?”
So I think I’m going to keep on living.
In this world on the brink of destruction.
It’s not anything so grandiose as atonement, but if I’m going to keep living,
I’ve decided I want to live with purpose.
ARRIVAL IN JAPAN
YAHOO! Hello, this is Okina Baba, writing to you with a bizarre amount of
excitement.
This series has now reached its ninth volume.
Next thing you know, we’ll be in the double digits.
Ah, the number nine.
I think you can learn a lot about people from what they associate with it.
If you think of billiards, then you’re a normie!
Imagine being social enough to have real-life friends to play billiards with.
If you thought of a certain ice fairy who’s officially labeled as an idiot, then
you’re a nerd!
I don’t know if you’re casual or a hardcore nerd, but if you recognized that
reference at all, then you’re obviously one of us to some extent.
If you thought of a red machine coming to destroy all irregulars, then you’re a
From fan!
I’m sorry, but it’s too late for you. The Kojima particles have taken over your
brain.
Incidentally, these predictions are all based on my own personal biases and
assumptions, so please don’t take them too seriously.
By the way, the first thing I pictured was a red fairy quietly saying, Those who
wield too much power bring only chaos. I guess I’m a nerd and a From fan.
Anyway, putting the number nine aside, this volume of the series contains a
world full of as many problems as a billiard board has holes and a battle
between a young girl who looks a bit like an ice fairy and a man who gets fired
up like a red machine.
…What’s scary is that none of that is inaccurate.
But that part’s more like the continuation of Volume 8. I’m more excited
about that character’s appearance.
Who in the world am I talking about?! And what does that character want?!
You’ll find out the truth by reading this volume.
So yeah. I don’t know when this turned into a mystery series, but it’s not not a
mystery series, either.
Now, enough of the lead-in. Let’s get into the meat of things here.
That’s right. All of the above was just a lead-in.
Because I have more pages for the afterword than usual this time!
I can write as much as I want! And say whatever I want!
Wah-ha-ha! It’s finally my time to shiiiine!
HOWEVER! That’s not the reason I was so excited at the beginning.
It’s because I have a huge announcement!
An anime adaptation of So I’m a Spider, So What? is now in development!
Dun-dun-duuuun!
That’s right, this series is getting an anime!
Yaaaay! Clap, clap, clap!
This is totally serious. It’s not a joke or a prank.
Finally, at long last, the time has come!
When the web novel became a printed series, it went from being only text to
having Kiryuu-sensei’s illustrations.
When it became a manga, Kakashi-sensei developed a lively version of the
world.
Thanks to Kiryuu-sensei and Kakashi-sensei, things that were difficult to
convey with text alone can now be beautifully portrayed with images.
And now, motion and sound will be added to the mix.
Kumoko’s going to be moving on the screen!
And talking!
Well, she can’t actually talk, so maybe you’ll be hearing a lot of her inner
thoughts.
At any rate, getting an anime adaptation means achieving a major goal for
creators like me.
Wow. I guess everything is going my way!
Ah, you’re right; I’m sorry. I got carried away there.
Anyway, they’ve already made a PV, so please go and check it out.
It’ll be a while before it actually airs, but the PV is a good way to get an idea of
what it might be like.
And you’ll get to see Kumoko, who was only ever on the page before, moving
around on a screen.
Now, allow me to give some words of thanks.
First, to Kiryuu-sensei, for always bringing the world of So I’m a Spider, So
What? to life with beautiful illustrations.
I really think it’s thanks to Kiryuu-sensei’s art that the series managed to get
an anime adaptation.
The cover for this volume is wonderful, too. Thank you so much.
And thank you to Kakashi-sensei, who draws the So I’m a Spider, So What?
manga so well that it’s as if it’s really moving, even though it’s not anime.
Kakashi-sensei’s style is so amazing that you can just imagine the action like it’s
unfolding right before your eyes.
Volume 5 of the always lively manga adaptation is on sale now as well.
To everyone involved in the creation of the anime, thank you so much for
making such a wonderful PV.
To everyone who helped bring this book into the world, especially my editor,
W.
And to everyone who picked up this book.
Thank you all so much.
Thank you for buying this ebook, published by Yen On.
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