4

V ir gin ia W o o lf (I882-1941)

B o rn in Lo n d o n , V irg in ia W o o lf is reco g n iz e d as o n e o f th e m ost im p o rta n t

n o ve lists o f th e tw e n tie th ce n tu ry. In flu e n c e d b y Ja m e s Jo y c e an d M a rc e l Pro u st,
she atte m p te d to cre a te a n e w fo rm fo r th e n o v e l b y e x p e rim e n tin g w ith stream -
jf - co n scio u sn ess w ritin g , in w h ic h sh e d isru p te d tim e in a n e ffo rt to ca p tu re th e
in n e r th o u g h t p ro cesses o f h e r ch aracters.
W o o lf w ro te n o ve ls, sh ort stories, essays, lite ra ry criticis m , an d b io g ra p h ies.
H e r n o ve ls in clu d e Mrs. Dalloivay (1 9 2 5), To the Lighthouse (1 9 2 7), an d The Waves
: 1931). A m o n g h e r short - story co lle ctio n s are Keiv Gardens (1 9 1 9) a n d A Haunted
House and Other Short Stories (1943)- H e r b o o k A Room o f One’s Own (1 9 2 9), in
w h ich she d e als w ith th e p ro b le m s o f b ein g a w o m an w rite r, is reco g n iz e d as an
im p orta n t e x a m ple o f e a rly fe m in ist lite ratu re. In 1941, d e e p ly d istu rb e d b y th e tw o
w o rld w ars sh e h a d e x p erie n ce d , as w e ll as b y h e r in cre asin g in a b ility to d e al w ith
severe ch ro n ic d e p ressio n , W o o lf d ro w n e d h erself.

39
40 ■ Husbands, Wives, and Lovers

T H E LEG A CY
When a well-known politician's wife dies, her husband fin d s that she
has left him an unusual legacy.

U T 7 o r Sissy M ille r.” G ilb e rt C la n d o n , ta k in g u p th e p e a rl b ro o c h 1 th at la y

X a m o n g a litt e r 2 o f rin gs a n d b ro o ch es o n a little ta b le in h is w if e ’s
d raw in g - ro o m , re a d th e in scrip tio n : “F o r Sissy M ille r, w ith m y lo v e .”
It w as lik e A n g e la to h a ve re m e m b ere d e v e n Sissy M ille r, h e r secre tary.
Y e t h o w stran g e it w as, G ilb e rt C la n d o n th o u g h t o n ce m ore, th at sh e h a d s
le ft e v e ryth in g in su ch o rd e r— a little g ift o f so m e sort fo r e v e ry o n e o f h er
frie n d s. It w as as if sh e h a d fo rese e n h e r d eath. Y e t sh e h a d b e e n in
p e rfe ct h e alth w h e n sh e le ft th e h o use th at m o rnin g , six w e e k s ago; w h e n
sh e ste p p e d o ff th e k e r b 3 in Pic c a d illy a n d th e ca r h a d k ille d her.
H e w as w a itin g fo r Sissy M ille r. H e h a d ask e d h e r to co m e; h e o w e d 10
h er, h e fe lt, a fte r a ll th e ye ars sh e h a d b e e n w ith th e m , th is to k e n o f
c o n sid e ra tio n .4 Y es, h e w e n t o n, as h e sat th e re w a itin g , it w as stran g e
th at A n g e la h a d le ft e v e ry th in g in su ch ord er. E v e ry frie n d h a d b e e n le ft
so m e little to k e n o f h e r a ffe ctio n . E v e ry rin g , e v e ry n e c k la ce , e v e ry little
C h in ese b o x— sh e h a d a p assio n fo r little b o x es— h a d a n a m e o n it. A n d 15
e ach h a d so m e m e m o ry fo r him . T h is h e h a d g iv e n h er; th is— th e e n a m el
d o lp h in w 'ith th e ru b y e yes— sh e h a d p o u n ce d u p o n 5 o n e d a y in a b ack
stre et in V e n ice . H e co u ld re m e m b er h e r little cry o f d elig h t. T o him , o f
co u rse, sh e h a d le ft n o th in g in p a rtic u la r, u n less it w e re h e r d ia ry. Fifte e n
little vo lu m e s, b o u n d in g re e n le a th e r, sto o d b e h in d h im o n h e r w ritin g 20
ta b le. E v e r sin ce th e y w e re m arrie d , sh e h a d k e p t a d ia ry. So m e o f th e ir
v e ry fe w — h e co u ld n o t c a ll th e m q u arrels, sa y tiffs 6— h a d b e e n a b o u t
th at d ia ry. W h e n h e ca m e in a n d fo u n d h e r w ritin g , sh e a lw a ys sh u t it or
p u t h e r h a n d o v e r it. “ N o , n o , n o ,” h e co u ld h e a r h e r say. “A fte r I ’m
d e a d— p e rh a p s.” So sh e h a d le ft it him , as h e r legacy.7 It was the only 25
th in g th e y h a d n o t sh are d w h e n sh e w a s a liv e . B u t h e h a d a lw a ys ta k e n
it fo r g ra n te d 8 th a t sh e w o u ld o u tliv e him . If o n ly sh e h a d sto p p e d o n e
m o m en t, a n d h a d th o u g h t w h a t sh e w as d o in g , sh e w o u ld b e a liv e n o w .
B u t sh e h a d ste p p e d straig h t o ff th e k e rb , th e d riv e r o f th e ca r h a d said
at th e in q u e s t.9 Sh e h a d g iv e n h im n o ch a n ce to p u ll u p. . . . H e re th e 30
so u n d o f v o ic e s in th e h a ll in te rru p te d him .
“M iss M ille r, Sir,” said th e m aid .

1 brooch a piece o f je w elry t h a t fastens wit h a pin 6 tiffs sm all disa g re e m e n ts

2 a litter a n u n ti d y a rra n g e m e n t 7 lega cy w h a t is left t o s o m e o n e aft er d e a t h;
3 kerb British sp ellin g o f curb (t h e e d g e o f a in h e rit a nce
sid e w al k) 8 taken for gra n t e d assu m e d
4 token of consid era tion a sm all sig n of re g ard 9 inqu est an official in q u iry in t o ca use o f d e a t h
5 p ounced upon su d d e n ly g r a b b e d
 The Legacy ■ 41

Sh e ca m e in . H e h a d n e v e r se e n h e r a lo n e in h is life , n or, o f co u rse,

in tears. Sh e w as te rrib ly d istresse d , 10 a n d n o w o n d e r . 11 A n g e la h a d b e e n
m uch m ore to h e r th a n a n e m p lo yer. Sh e h a d b e e n a frie n d . T o h im self, 35
h e th o u g h t, as h e p u sh e d a c h a ir fo r h e r a n d ask e d h e r to sit d o w n , she
w as sca rce ly d istin g u ish a b le fro m a n y o th e r w o m a n o f h e r k in d . T h e re
w e re th o usa n d s o f Sissy M ille rs— d ra b 12 little w o m e n in b la c k ca rryin g
attach e cases . 13 B u t A n g e la , w ith h e r g e n iu s fo r sy m p ath y, h a d d isco ve re d
a ll sorts o f q u alitie s in Sissy M ille r. Sh e w as th e so u l o f d iscre tio n ; 14 so 40
sile n t; so tru stw o rth y, o n e co u ld te ll h e r a n yth in g , a n d so on.
M iss M ille r co u ld n o t sp e a k at first. Sh e sat th e re d a b b in g 15 h e r eyes
w ith h e r p o c k e t h a n d k e rch ie f. T h e n sh e m a d e a n e ffo rt.
“Pa rd o n m e, Mr. C la n d o n ,” sh e said.
H e m urm ure d . O f co u rse h e u n d ersto o d . It w a s o n ly n a tu ral. H e 45

co u ld g u ess w h a t h is w ife h a d m e a n t to h er.

“I ’v e b e e n so h a p p y h e re ,” sh e said , lo o k in g ro u n d . H e r e yes reste d
o n th e w ritin g ta b le b e h in d him . It w as h e re th e y h a d w o rk e d — sh e an d
A n g ela. F o r A n g e la h a d h e r sh are o f th e d u ties th at fa ll to th e lo t o f 16 a
p ro m in e n t17 p o liticia n ’s w ife . Sh e h a d b e e n th e g reatest h e lp to h im in his so
care er. H e h a d o fte n se e n h e r a n d Sissy sittin g at th a t ta b le— Sissy at th e
ty p e w rite r, ta k in g d o w n le tte rs fro m h e r d icta tio n . N o d o u b t M iss M ille r
w as th in k in g o f th at, to o. N o w a ll h e h a d to d o w as to g iv e h e r th e
b ro o ch h is w ife h a d le ft h er. A ra th e r in c o n g ru o u s 18 g ift it see m e d. It
m ig h t h a ve b e e n b e tte r to h a ve le ft h e r a su m o f m o n ey, o r e v e n th e 55
ty p e w rite r. B u t th e re it w as— “F o r Sissy M ille r, w ith m y lo v e .” A n d , ta k in g
th e b ro o ch , h e g ave it h e r w ith th e little sp e ech th a t h e h a d p re p are d . H e
k n e w , h e said , th at sh e w o u ld v a lu e it. H is w ife h a d o fte n w o rn it. . . .
A n d sh e re p lie d , as sh e to o k it alm ost as if sh e to o h a d p re p a re d a
sp e ech , th at it w o u ld a lw a ys b e a tre asu re d p ossessio n . . . . Sh e h a d , h e eo
su p p o se d , o th e r clo th e s u p o n w h ic h a p e a rl b ro o ch w o u ld n o t lo o k q u ite
so in co n g ru o u s. Sh e w as w e a rin g th e little b la c k co a t a n d s k irt th at
see m e d th e u n ifo rm o f h e r p ro fessio n . T h e n h e re m e m b ere d— sh e w as in
m o u rn in g ,19 o f co u rse. Sh e, to o, h a d h a d h e r tra g e d y— a b ro th er, to w h o m
sh e w as d evo te d , h a d d ie d o n ly a w e e k o r tw o b efo re A n g ela. In so m e 65
accid e n t w as it? H e co u ld n o t re m e m b er— o n ly A n g e la te llin g him . A n g ela,
w ith h e r g e n iu s fo r sy m p ath y, h a d b e e n te rrib ly u p set. M e a n w h ile Sissy
M ille r h a d rise n . Sh e w as p u ttin g o n h e r g lo ves. E v id e n tly sh e fe lt th a t she
o u g h t n o t to in tru d e. B u t h e co u ld n o t le t h e r g o w ith o u t sayin g so m ethin g
a b o u t h e r fu tu re . W h a t w e re h e r p la n s? W as th e re a n y w a y in w h ic h h e 70

co u ld h e lp h er?

10 distressed d e e p ly u pset 15 d a b b ing lig h tly p a t tin g

11 no w o n d e r n o t sur p risin gly 16 fall to th e lo t of b e c o m e t h e res p o nsibility of
12 drab d ull 17 prom in e n t w ell - k n o w n
13 a ttache cases sm all le a t h e r cases f o r carr yin g 18 in co ngru o us u nsuit a ble
p a p ers 19 in m ourn ing in a st at e o f grie f f o r so m e o n e
14 soul o f d iscre tion a p e rf ec t e x a m p le o f w h o has die d
trustw o rt hin ess
42 ■ Husbands, Wives, and Lovers

Sh e w as g a z in g at th e ta b le , w h e re sh e h a d sat at h e r ty p e w rite r,
w h e re th e d ia ry la y. A n d , lo st in h e r m e m ories o f A n g e la , sh e d id n o t at
o n ce a n sw e r h is su g g estio n th a t h e sh o u ld h e lp h er. Sh e se e m e d fo r a
m o m e n t n o t to u n d ersta n d . So h e re p e a te d : 75
“W h a t are y o u r p la n s, M iss M ille r?”
“M y p la n s? O h , th a t’s a ll rig h t, M r. C la n d o n ,” sh e e x claim e d . “Ple a s e
d o n ’t b o th e r y o u rs e lf a b o u t m e .”
H e to o k h e r to m e a n 20 th at sh e w as in n o n e e d o f fin a n cia l assistance.
It w o u ld b e b etter, h e re aliz e d , to m a k e a n y su g g estio n o f th at k in d so
in a letter. A ll h e co u ld d o n o w w as to say as h e p resse d h e r h an d,
“Re m e m b er, M iss M ille r, if th e re ’s a n y w a y in w h ic h I ca n h e lp yo u , it w ill
b e a p le asu re. . . . ” T h e n h e o p e n e d th e d oor. F o r a m o m ent, o n th e
th resh o ld , as if a su d d e n th o u g h t h a d stru ck her, sh e sto p p e d.
“Mr. C la n d o n ,” she said, lo o k in g straig ht at him fo r th e first tim e, a n d as
fo r th e first tim e h e w as struck b y th e e x p ressio n, sy m p ath etic y e t searchin g ,
in h e r eyes. “If at a n y tim e,” she co n tin u e d , “th e re ’s a n yth in g I ca n d o to
h e lp yo u , re m e m b er, I sh all fe e l it, fo r y o u r w ife ’s sak e, a p leasu re. . . . ”
W it h th a t sh e w a s g o n e. H e r w o rd s a n d th e lo o k th at w e n t w ith th e m
w e re u n e x p ecte d . It w as alm ost as if sh e b e lie v e d , o r h o p e d , th a t h e 90

w o u ld n e e d h er. A cu rio u s, p erh a p s a fa n tastic id e a o ccu rre d to h im as

h e re tu rn e d to h is ch air. C o u ld it b e, th at d u rin g a ll th ose ye a rs w h e n h e
h a d sc a rc e ly n o tice d h er, sh e, as th e n o v e lists say, h a d e n te rtain e d a
p assio n fo r him ? H e ca u g h t h is o w n re fle c tio n in th e glass as h e p asse d.
H e w as o v e r fifty ; b u t h e co u ld n o t h e lp a d m ittin g th at h e w a s s till, as 95

th e lo o kin g - glass sh o w e d him , a v e ry d istin g u ish e d - lo o k in g 21 m an.

“Po o r Sissy M ille r!” h e said , h a lf la u g h in g . H o w h e w o u ld h a ve lik e d
to sh are th at jo k e w ith h is w ife! H e tu rn e d in s tin c tiv e ly to h e r d ia ry.
“ G ilb e rt,” h e re a d , o p e n in g it at ra n d o m ,22 “lo o k e d so w o n d e rfu l. . . .” It
w as as if sh e h a d a n sw e re d h is q u estio n . O f co u rse, sh e se e m e d to say, 10 0

y o u ’re v e ry a ttra ctive to w o m e n . O f co u rse Sissy M ille r fe lt th at to o. H e

re a d o n. “ H o w p ro u d I am to b e h is w ife !” A n d h e h a d a lw a ys b e e n v e ry
p ro u d to b e h e r h usb a n d . H o w o fte n , w h e n th e y d in e d o u t so m e w h ere,
h e h a d lo o k e d at h e r across th e ta b le a n d said to h im self, “Sh e is th e
lo v e lie s t w o m a n h e re!” H e re a d o n. T h a t first y e a r h e h a d b e e n sta n d in g 10 5

fo r Pa rlia m e n t.23 T h e y h a d to u re d h is c o n s titu e n cy .24 “W h e n G ilb e rt sat

d o w n th e a p p la u se w as te rrific. T h e w h o le a u d ie n ce rose a n d san g: ‘F o r
h e ’s a jo lly g o o d fe llo w .’ I w as q u ite o v e rco m e .” H e re m e m b ere d th at,
to o. Sh e h a d b e e n sittin g o n th e p la tfo rm b esid e him . H e co u ld s till see
th e g la n ce sh e cast at him , a n d h o w sh e h a d te ars in h e r eyes. A n d th e n? 11 0

H e tu rn e d th e p a g es. T h e y h a d g o n e to V e n ice . H e re c a lle d th at h a p p y

h o lid a y a fte r th e e le ctio n . “W e h a d ice s at F lo ria n s .” H e s m ile d— sh e w as
s till su ch a c h ild ; sh e lo v e d ices. “G ilb e rt g ave m e a m ost in te restin g

2 0 He too k her to m ean H e assu m e d 2 3 st a n d ing fo r Parliam en t ru n n in g f o r ele ctio n

sh e m e a n t t o t h e British le gislat ure
21 d istingu ish e d-lo o k ing a p p e arin g i m p o r t a n t 2 4 constitu e ncy t h e are a h e w o u ld re p r ese n t in
22 at random w it h o u t a n y pla n Pa rli a m e n t
 The Legacy m 43

acco u n t o f th e h isto ry o f V e n ice . H e to ld m e th at th e D o g e s 25 . . . ” sh e

h a d w ritte n it a ll o u t in h e r sc h o o lg irl h a n d . O n e o f th e d elig h ts o f 115
tra v e llin g w ith A n g e la h a d b e e n th a t sh e w as so e a g e r to le a rn . Sh e w as
so te rrib ly ig n o ra n t, sh e u se d to say, as if th a t w e re n o t o n e o f h e r
ch arm s. A n d th e n— h e o p e n e d th e n e x t vo lu m e— th e y h a d co m e b ac k to
Lo n d o n . “I w as so a n x io u s to m a k e a g o o d im p ressio n . I w o re m y
w e d d in g d re ss.” H e co u ld see h e r n o w sittin g n e x t to o ld Sir E d w a rd ; a n d 120
m a k in g a co n q u est o f th at fo rm id a b le 26 o ld m an, h is c h ie f. H e re a d o n
ra p id ly , fillin g in sce n e a fte r sce n e fro m h e r scra p p y fra g m e n ts.27 “ D in e d
a t th e H o u se o f C o m m o ns. . . . T o a n e v e n in g p a rty at th e Lo v e g ro v e s’.
D id I re a liz e m y re s p o n sib ility, La d y L. ask e d m e, as G ilb e rt’s w ife ?”
T h e n , as th e ye a rs p asse d— h e to o k a n o th e r v o lu m e fro m th e w ritin g 12 5

ta b le— h e h a d b eco m e m ore a n d m ore a b so rb e d in h is w o rk . A n d sh e,

o f co u rse, w as m ore o fte n h o m e. . . . It h a d b e e n a g re a t g rie f to h er,
a p p a re n tly, th at th e y h a d h a d n o c h ild re n . “ H o w I w is h ,” o n e e n try re a d ,
“th a t G ilb e rt h a d a so n!” O d d ly e n o u g h h e h a d n e v e r m u ch re g re tte d th at
h im self. Life h a d b e e n so fu ll, so ric h as it w as. T h a t y e a r h e h a d b e e n 13 0

g iv e n a m in o r p ost in th e g o vern m e n t. A m in o r p ost o n ly, b u t h e r

co m m e n t w as: “I am q u ite ce rta in n o w th a t h e w ill b e Prim e M in iste r!”
W e ll, if th in g s h a d g o n e d iffe re n tly, it m ig h t h a ve b e e n so. H e p a use d
h e re to s p e cu la te u p o n w h a t m ig h t h a ve b e e n . Po litics w a s a g a m b le, h e
re fle cte d ; b u t th e ga m e w a s n ’t o v e r y e t. N o t at fifty. H e cast h is e yes 135

ra p id ly o v e r m ore p a g es, fu ll o f th e little trifle s ,28 th e in sig n ifica n t, h a p p y,

d a ily trifle s th at h a d m a d e u p h e r life .
H e to o k u p a n o th er vo lu m e a n d o p e n e d it at ra n d o m . “W h a t a
c o w a rd I am! I le t th e ch a n ce slip a g ain . B u t it see m e d se lfis h to b o th e r
h im w ith m y o w n a ffairs, w h e n h e h a d so m uch to th in k a b o u t. A n d w e 14 0

so seld o m h a ve a n e v e n in g a lo n e .” W h a t w as th e m e a n in g o f th at? O h ,
h e re w as th e e x p la n a tio n— it re fe rre d to h e r w o rk in th e Ea st E n d .29 “I
p lu c k e d u p co u ra g e a n d ta lk e d to G ilb e rt at last. H e w a s so k in d , so
g o o d . H e m ad e n o o b je ctio n .” H e re m e m b ere d th a t co n ve rsa tio n . Sh e
h a d to ld h im th a t sh e fe lt so id le , so u seless. Sh e w is h e d to h a ve so m e 14 5

w o rk o f h e r o w n . Sh e w a n te d to d o so m e thin g— sh e h a d b lu sh e d so
p re ttily, h e re m e m b ere d , as sh e said it, sittin g in th a t v e r y 30 ch a ir— to h e lp
o th ers. H e h a d b a n te re d 31 h e r a little . H a d n ’t sh e e n o u g h to d o lo o k in g
a fte r him , a fte r h e r h o m e? Still, if it a m use d h er, o f co u rse h e h a d n o
o b je ctio n . W h a t w as it? So m e d istrict? So m e co m m itte e? O n ly sh e m ust 15 0

p ro m ise n o t to m a k e h e rs e lf ill. So it se e m e d th a t e v e ry W e d n e s d a y sh e
w e n t to W h ite c h a p e l.32 H e re m e m b ere d h o w h e h a te d th e clo th e s she
w o re o n th ose o ccasio n s. B u t sh e h a d ta k e n it v e ry se rio u sly, it see m e d.
T h e d ia ry w as fu ll o f re fe re n ce s lik e th is: “Sa w M rs. Jo n e s. . . . Sh e has

2 5 t h e D o g e s c h ie f officials in t h e Italian 28 t r if l e s u n i m p o r t a n t eve n ts

re p u blics of V e nice a n d G e n o a 29 t h e East En d a traditionally p o or area o f Lo nd o n
2 6 f o r m i d a b l e frig h t e n in g 30 v e r y p ar ticul ar
2 7 s c r a p p y f r a g m e n t s v e r y in c o m p le t e d ia ry 31 b a n t e r e d te ase d
e ntries 32 W h i t e c h a p e l an area in t h e East End o f Lo n d o n
44 ■ Husbands, Wives, and Lovers

te n c h ild re n . . . . H u sb a n d lo st h is arm in a n accid e n t. . . . D id m y b est 15 5

to fin d a jo b fo r L ily .” H e s k ip p e d o n. H is o w n n a m e o ccu rre d less

fre q u e n tly.
H is in te rest sla c k e n e d .33 So m e o f th e e n tries co n ve y e d n o th in g to him .
F o r e x a m p le: “ H a d a h e a te d arg u m e n t a b o u t so cialis m w ith B . M .” W h o
w as B . M .? H e co u ld n o t f ill in th e in itia ls; so m e w o m a n , h e su p p ose d , iso
th at sh e h a d m et o n o n e o f h e r co m m ittees. “B . M . m ad e a vio le n t attack
u p o n th e u p p e r classes. . . . I w a lk e d b ack afte r th e m e e tin g w ith B. M.
an d trie d to c o n vin c e him . B u t h e is so n arro w - m in d e d .” So B . M . w as a
m an— n o d o u b t o n e o f th ose “in te lle c tu a ls,” as th e y c a ll th e m selves, w h o
are so vio le n t, as A n g e la said , a n d so n arro w - m in d e d . Sh e h a d in vite d h im ies
to co m e an d see h e r a p p a re n tly. “B . M . ca m e to d in n er. H e sh o o k h an ds
w ith M in n ie!” T h a t n o te o f e x cla m a tio n g ave a n o th er tw ist to h is m e n tal
p ictu re. B . M ., it see m e d, w a s n ’t use d to p arlo u rm aid s; h e h a d sh a k e n
h an ds w ith M in n ie . Pre su m a b ly h e w as o n e o f th ose ta m e w o rk in g m en
w h o a ir th e ir vie w s in la d ie s’ d raw in g - ro o m s. G ilb e rt k n e w th e ty p e , a n d 17 0

h a d n o lik in g fo r th is p a rtic u la r sp ecim e n , w h o e v e r B . M . m ig h t b e. H e re

h e w as a g ain. “W e n t w ith B . M . to th e T o w e r o f Lo n d o n . . . . H e said
re v o lu tio n is b o u n d t o 34 co m e. . . . H e said w e liv e in a F o o l’s Pa ra d is e .”
T h a t w as just th e k in d o f th in g B . M . w o u ld say— G ilb e rt co u ld h e a r him .
H e co u ld also see h im q u ite d istin ctly— a stu b b y 35 little m an, w ith a ro u g h 17 5

b e ard , re d tie, d resse d as th e y a lw a ys d id in tw e e d s,36 w h o h a d n e v e r

d o n e a n h o n est d a y ’s w o rk in h is life . Su re ly A n g e la h a d th e sense to see
th ro u g h him ? H e re a d o n. “B . M . said so m e v e ry d isa g re e a b le thin gs
a b o u t— .” T h e na m e w as c a re fu lly scra tch e d o u t. “I to ld h im I w o u ld n o t
liste n to a n y m ore a b use o f— ” A g ain th e n a m e w as o b lite ra te d . C o u ld it iso
h a ve b e e n h is o w n na m e? W as th at w h y A n g e la co ve re d th e p a g e so
q u ic k ly w h e n h e ca m e in? T h e th o u g h t a d d e d to his g ro w in g d islik e o f
B . M . H e h a d h a d th e im p e rtin e n ce to d iscuss h im in this v e ry ro o m . W h y
h a d A n g e la n e v e r to ld him ? It w as v e ry u n lik e h e r to co n ce a l a n yth in g ;
sh e h a d b e e n th e so u l o f ca n d o u r.37 H e tu rn e d th e p a g es, p ic k in g o u t iss
e v e ry re fe re n ce to B . M . “B. M. to ld m e th e sto ry o f his ch ild h o o d . H is
m o th er w e n t o u t c h a rrin g .38 . . . W h e n I th in k o f it, I ca n h a rd ly b e ar to
g o o n liv in g in such lu x u ry. . . . T h re e g u in e a s 39 fo r o n e h a t!” If o n ly she
h a d d iscu sse d th e m atter w ith him , in ste a d o f p u z z lin g h e r p o o r little h e a d
a b o u t q u estio n s th at w e re m uch to o d iffic u lt fo r h e r to u n d ersta n d! H e 19 0

h a d le n t h e r b o o ks. Karl Marx, The Coming Revolution. T h e in itia ls B . M .,

B . M ., B. M ., re cu rre d re p e a te d ly. B u t w h y n e v e r th e fu ll n a m e? T h e re w as
an in fo rm ality, an in tim a cy in th e use o f in itia ls th at w as ve ry' u n lik e
A n g ela. H a d sh e c a lle d him B. M . to h is face? H e re a d o n. “B . M. ca m e
une x pectedly^ after d in n er. L u c k ily , I w as a lo n e .” T h a t w as o n ly a y e a r ago. 19 5

33 slackened lessene d 37 soul o f can d o ur a p e rf ect e x a m ple o f h o n esty

3 4 is b ound to is ce rt ain t o 38 c h arring h o u secle a nin g
35 stubby sh or t a n d b ro a d 3 9 thre e guin e as t h r e e p o u n ds a n d t hr e e
36 t w e eds clo t h es m a d e fr o m a ro u g h w o o le n shillings (o ld British c u rr e n cy)
m a terial
 The Legacy m 45

"L u c k ily”— w h y lu c k ily?— “I w as a lo n e .” W h e re h a d h e b e e n th at nig h t? H e

ch eck e d th e d ate in h is e n g a g e m e n t b o o k . It h a d b e e n th e n ig h t o f th e
M a n sio n H o u se d in n er. A n d B . M . an d A n g e la h a d sp e n t th e e ve n in g
alo n e! H e trie d to re c a ll th at e ve n in g . W as sh e w a itin g u p fo r him w h e n
h e ca m e b ack? H a d th e ro o m lo o k e d just as usu al? W e re th ere glasses o n 200

th e ta b le? W e re th e ch airs d ra w n clo se to g e th er? H e co u ld re m e m b er

n o th in g— n o th in g w h a te ve r, n o th in g e x ce p t h is o w n sp e ech at th e
M a n sio n H o u se d in n er. It b eca m e m ore a n d m ore in e x p lic a b le to him —
th e w h o le situ a tio n : h is w ife re c e ivin g a n u n k n o w n m an alo n e . Pe rh a p s
th e n e x t vo lu m e w o u ld e x p lain . H a stily h e re ach e d fo r th e last o f th e 205

d iaries— th e o n e sh e h a d le ft u n fin ish e d w h e n sh e d ie d . T h e re , o n th e v e ry

first p a g e, w as th at cu rse d 40 fe llo w a g ain. “ D in e d alo n e w ith B. M . . . . H e
b eca m e v e ry a gitate d . H e said it w as tim e w e u n d ersto o d e ach o th er. . . .
I trie d to m a k e h im liste n . B u t h e w o u ld n ot. H e th re a te n e d th at if I d id
n o t . . . ” th e rest o f th e p a g e w as sco re d o v e r.41 Sh e h a d w ritte n “Eg y p t. 210

Eg y p t. E g y p t,” o v e r th e w h o le p a g e. H e co u ld n o t m a k e o u t a sin g le w o rd ;
b u t th ere co u ld b e o n ly o n e in te rp re ta tio n : th e sc o u n d re l42 h a d ask e d h e r
to b eco m e h is m istress. A lo n e in h is roo m ! T h e b lo o d rush e d to G ilb e rt
C la n d o n ’s face. H e tu rn e d th e p a g es ra p id ly. W h a t h a d b e e n h e r a n sw er?
In itia ls h a d ce ase d . It w as sim p ly “h e ” n o w . “ H e ca m e a g ain . I to ld h im I 2 15

co u ld n o t co m e to a n y d ecisio n . . . . I im p lo re d 43 h im to le a v e m e .” H e
h a d fo rc e d h im se lf u p o n h e r in th is v e ry h o use. B u t w h y h a d n ’t sh e to ld
him ? H o w co u ld she h a ve h esita te d fo r a n insta n t? T h e n : “I w ro te h im a
le tte r.” T h e n p a g es w e re le ft b la n k . T h e n th ere w as this: “ N o a n sw e r to
m y le tte r.” T h e n m ore b la n k p a g es; an d th e n this: “ H e has d o n e w h a t h e 220

th re a te n e d .” A fte r th at— w h a t ca m e after th at? H e tu rn e d p a g e after p age.

A ll w e re b la n k . B u t th e re, o n th e v e ry d a y b e fo re h e r d eath , w as this
e n try: “ H a v e I th e co u ra g e to d o it to o?” T h a t w as th e en d.
G ilb e rt C la n d o n le t th e b o o k slid e to th e flo o r. H e co u ld see h e r in
fro n t o f him . Sh e w as sta n d in g o n th e k e rb in Pic c a d illy . H e r e yes stare d ; 225

h e r fists w e re cle n ch e d . H e re ca m e th e car. . . . H e co u ld n o t b e a r it. H e

m ust k n o w th e tru th . H e stro d e to th e te le p h o n e .
“M iss M ille r?” T h e re w as sile n ce . T h e n h e h e ard so m e o n e m o vin g in
th e ro o m . “Sissy M ille r sp e a k in g ”— h e r v o ic e at last a n sw e re d him .
“W h o ,” h e th u n d e re d , “is B . M .?” 230

H e co u ld h e a r th e ch e a p clo c k tic k in g o n h e r m a n te lp iece ; th e n a

lo n g d ra w n sig h. T h e n at last sh e said : “ H e w as m y b ro th e r.”
H e was h e r b ro th e r; h e r b ro th e r w h o h a d k ille d h im self. “Is th e re ,”
h e h e ard Sissy M ille r ask in g , '"a n yth in g th a t I ca n e x p la in ?”
“ N o th in g !” h e crie d . “ N o th in g!” 235

H e h a d re c e iv e d h is le g a cy. Sh e h a d to ld h im th e tru th . Sh e h a d
ste p p e d o ff th e k erb to re jo in h e r lo ve r. Sh e h a d ste p p e d o ff th e k e rb to
esca p e fro m him .

4 0 c u rs e d b e as tly 42 sco u n d rel a b a d or dish o n est person

41 t h e p a g e w a s s c o r e d o v e r t h e w o r d s w e r e 43 im plore d begged
bloc k e d o u t b y w ri ti n g o v e r t h e m