Talk:John Butler Walden

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:John Butler Walden/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: CPA-5 (talk · contribs) 09:42, 26 September 2019 (UTC)

Claim my seat here. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 09:42, 26 September 2019 (UTC)

• Born in British Tanganyika to a white father Pipe British Tanganyika to the Tanganyika (territory).
  • Done.
• Walden served as commander of the 207th Brigade in the Tanzania People's Defence Force No link for the Brigade?
  • I'm not confident there is enough sourcing out there to warrant the brigade being given its own article.
• Stanley Arthur Walden, and a black mother, Violet Nambela in Tunduru, Tanganyika No née?
  • The sources just refer to her as Violet Nambela, and it seems like her and S. A. Walden were not married.
• which hosted many mixed-race students.[4][2] Re-order the refs here.
  • Done.
• Was he the only child of his parents?
  • He had a younger brother Paul, which I've mentioned. I've added in a footnote that its possible Paul was born to a different mother.
• he was promoted to lance corporal Link lance corporal.
  • Done
• became a sovereign state and the 6th Battalion KAR was transferred --> "became a sovereign state and the 6th Battalion KAR were transferred"
  • I thought "battalion" was singular.

• I thought the same as you until I found out that British articles or British related articles should have singluars as plural in some situations look at English plurals#Singulars with collective meaning treated as plural organisations within the army should be plural. Because he served in the British Army before independence years thus the article should use the British way of writing. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 19:54, 27 September 2019 (UTC)

• In 1962 Walden was made a sergeant and became Link sergeant.
  • Done.
• He graduated in April 1963 as a lieutenant and was given Link lieutenant.
  • Done.
• Iringa while holding the rank of major Link major.
  • Done.
• with the rank of brigadier Link brigadier.
  • Done.
• and during the TPDF's counterattack Walden and his men American counterattack.
  • Changed to "counter-attack".
• However, it was able to reach its destination --> "However, it were able to reach their destination"
  • I'm using battalion as singular.
• promoted to the rank of major general Link major general.
  • Done.
• placed in command of Operation Uhai to combat poachers Is there a link for the operation?
  • No, and very little information on it altogether.
• Walden served as the Tanzanian military attaché in London Unlink London because of common term.
  • Done.

Infobox

• "Allegiance" Maybe add the years where he was active in every party?
  • I'd rather not for a few reasons. Tanganyika became Tanzania in 1964 after joining with Zanzibar, but the sources I've found thus far don't point a clear line to the transformation of the Tanganyika Rifles to the TPDF (though it definitely happened around the same time). And though we know Walden was in military service the whole time, we don't know the fate of his unit in that transformation. Plus, we don't have an end date for his service to Tanzania, since we don't know his exact retirement.

Images

• Is there a link for the File:Brigadier John Walden.jpg
  • What do you mean? The book its from was in print.

Sources

• Maybe translate the title of Daudi's source?
  • Google translates it roughly to "Be aware of the 'Black Mamba' and the History of Tanzania" which is very clunky. No online Swahili dictionary has returned a meaning for Mfahamu.
• Ref 4, which page number?
  • It's an ebook without page numbers, "The case of Stanley Arthur Walden" is the subsection title.
• "War in Uganda: The Legacy of Idi Amin" Doesn't need a Google Books' URL.
  • Delinked.
• "The River: A Journey Back to the Source of HIV and AIDS" Same as above.
  • Delinked.
• No location for Mbogoni's book?
  • Added.
• Some ISBNs use hyphens others don't.
  • All dashes now.

That's anything from me. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 12:24, 26 September 2019 (UTC)

@CPA-5: I've responded to your comments

@CPA-5: The British plurals horrify my American sense of grammar, but nevertheless I've made the appropriate corrections. -Indy beetle (talk) 22:37, 29 September 2019 (UTC)

• I think it looks good enough for a GA. Cheers. CPA-5 (talk) 19:17, 30 September 2019 (UTC)