Christmas Blues

I have a problem around this time of year. It's kind of embarrassing, but I'm hoping I'm not the only one. 

It goes like this:

I'll be out shopping somewhere with John, when suddenly:

I'll hear it.

And I'll think, "No, it can't be. They wouldn't play THAT song. Not here! It must be some other song."

Then a few more seconds will go by, and I'll realize:

It IS that song.

They're playing Christmas Shoes.

 

So I tell myself I'll just ignore it. I talk to John a little louder. I try humming It's A Small World. But it's no use:

 

I start listening, in spite of myself.

And ninety seconds later:

[sobbing] "Buy him the shoes! BUY THE LITTLE BOY THE SHOES FOR HIS DYING MOTHER! AaahhhaaaaHAAA!!"

 And my mascara's running everywhere...

And the cashier is like:

And all the other customers are like:

And I turn to John for support, but he's crying, too, so we're BOTH like:

And THAT is why I'm never going back to that Honey Baked Ham outlet.

Thanks to Hannah F., Kimberly S., Linda M., Anony M., Rachel S.,  Marissa C.,  Jodee R., Kizzie F., & David G. who might claim they don't cry at Christmas Shoes, but if so they're filthy, filthy liars.

And just in case you've never had the pleasure, here it is. BUT DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU.

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What Could Go Wrong?

I've often thought the "gender-reveal cake" trend was fraught with peril, and today's wreck is a good example of why. 

In case you haven't heard of it, the reveal cake has either pink or blue icing hidden inside, depending on the baby's sex - but the kicker is, the parents bring that info sealed from their doctor to the bakery, so the cake is how they find out if they're having a boy or a girl. 

So...you're trusting a baker to correctly communicate your baby's sex? 

Gee, WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

 

 [whistling innocently]

Happily Kevin S. and his wife already knew they were having a boy, but for fun they decided to send a reveal cake to his parents to break the news. As is typical, they asked for it to be white on the outside and decorated with pink and blue polka dots, plus maybe a few question marks. Then they asked for blue icing inside the cake.

When the special order arrived at Kevin's parents' house, this is what they found:

o.0

And to think: someone looked at this and thought, "Yeah, that's what the customer wanted."

(John says you should read that cake out loud. So, go on. DO EET!)

Still, as baby cake trends go, it could always - ALWAYS - be worse:

...and frequently is. *sigh*

Thanks to Kevin and Stephanie F. for that revealing slice of humor.