Emotional moment mom of trans NCAA college swimmer breaks down in tears describing how she grew to accept her child's new identity

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The mother of a transgender NCAA college swimmer has described how she came to accept her child's new identity, telling her daughter in an emotional interview that she 'had to choose' to do so.

Meghan Cortez-Fields, a senior at New Jersey's Ramapo College, began to express her trans identity during her second season on the men's team, and has since transitioned after more than a year of hormone therapy.

Since joining the women's team, the chemistry major has established two school records and received support from her teammates, but has also faced backlash from critics who are against trans women's participation in women's sports.

The swimmer's mother Melissa Mueller has now reflected on the journey she has been on to come to terms with her child's gender dysmorphia, and said she regretted how she had acted towards her in the past.

'If I turned back the clock I wish I could've done some things differently,' Mueller said as she choked back tears during an emotional sit-down with her daughter.

The swimmer's mother Melissa Mueller has reflected on the journey she has been on to come to terms with her child's gender dysmorphia

Meghan Cortez-Fields, a senior at New Jersey 's Ramapo College, began to express her trans identity during her second season on the men's team, and has since transitioned after more than a year of hormone therapy 

Transgender swimmer Meghan Cortez-Fields broke Ramapo College's women's 100 yard butterfly and took first place after transferring from the men's team

Cortez-Fields shared a sweet snap with her mother, who has grown to accept her trans identity

Explaining her reaction to her child coming out as trans, Ms Mueller added: 'I remember in my Bible study I said "I need prayers. My oldest came out as transgender, and I just didn't know what to do."

'It just didn't sit well with me,' she went on, 'I feel like, God made you you for you. We're not supposed to change any part of ourselves, that was just in my mind, what I've always known.

'I said some mean, hurtful things, just because I'm scared, it's a fear, I failed my kid. Why didn't I see this, why didn't I do more?'

The mother reflected that she felt she had 'lost a little boy' when her child came out as trans.

But, she said she soon came to the realization that she did not have to lose her child. 

'I was laying in bed and thought listen, you didn't lose a kid, you have a kid right in front of you. You have a choice. 

'It may not be what you want it to be, but you have a choice. And I had to choose, I had to choose.'

Ms Mueller is now a big supporter of her daughter, with touching pictures showing the mother attending her swimming meets and the pair spending time together. 

Cortez-Fields was first in the spotlight a few months ago after breaking her school's record after transferring from the men's team in November 2023.

The chemistry major also claimed the top spot in the 200 yard individual medley and second in the 200 yard butterfly at the Cougar Splash Invitational in Dallas, Pennsylvania

The supportive mom is pictured with Cortez-Fields at one of her swim meets, where the swimmer is seen holding a bouquet

The senior smashed Ramapo College's record for the 100 yard butterfly with a time of 57:22, which earned her first place.

She also scooped the top spot in the 200 yard individual medley and second in the 200 yard butterfly at the Cougar Splash Invitational, a two-day meet between six schools in Dallas, Pennsylvania.

Then in February she broke program records at the NJAC championships when she finished the 200 IM with a time of 2:08:20.

But speaking to CNN for its new documentary, The Playing Field: The Battle over Transgender Athletes, Cortez-Fields said she feared the repercussions of winning.

'I was afraid that if I was able to win, all of my success would be discredited because I was trans,' she said.

'Trans people have existed since the beginning of time. But we win and it becomes an issue.' 

Cortez-Fields had competed with Ramapo's men's team for three seasons prior to switching to the women's team

She and her New Jersey liberal arts college have been the target of critics who believe that transgender women have unfair physical advantages and should not compete with cisgender women.

Transgender athletes and their supporters have said there is not enough evidence to support this and say that those who undergo treatment to lower testosterone levels deserve the right to compete.

While Cortez-Fields feared backlash, she said that 'the majority of the women I have met and swim against, they have celebrated me. 

Cortez-Fields (far left) has been in the spotlight since November 2023, for breaking her school's record after transferring from the men's team

'They make me feel like I deserve to be there, and I should fight for my place there,' she said. 

It comes as the NCAA has said its policy on allowing trans students to compete in sports programs is currently 'under review'.

The association revised its policy in 2022 in order to align 'transgender student-athlete participation with the Olympic Movement.'

It allows trans athletes to take part if they have undergone one year of testosterone suppression treatment and meet the testosterone level required by their sport's national or international governing body.

Cortez-Fields is one of Ramapo's only openly trans athletes and has cited fellow trans swimmer Lia Thomas as an inspiration

Some 25 states have laws or regulations in place that ban transgender students from participating on the team that aligns with their gender identity, according to the Movement Advancement Project, a group which tracks the legislation.

Cortez-Fields is one of Ramapo's first openly transgender athletes and counts transgender swimmer Lia Thomas among her heroes.

NCAA swimmer Thomas has faced similar criticism after winning in women's categories, despite previously competing on the men's swim team at the University of Pennsylvania.

In March 2022, Thomas became the first openly transgender athlete to win an NCAA Division I swimming event with a victory in the women's 500-yard freestyle.