The Test

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© 2017 T. S. Eure. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 11/03/2017

ISBN: 978-1-5462-1475-5 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-5462-1476-2 (e)

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Any book that draws emotions out of me is a great book! That’s what happened to me when I read THE TEST. I connected to characters in every chapter. I laughed. I cried. I was in suspense, wondering what would happen next…a real page-turner.

So, for those of you existing on this journey called LIFE, I challenge you all to take THE TEST. You will not be disappointed.

Angela Perkins Jean, Editor In Chief.

About the Author

T.S.Eure was born in Omaha, Nebraska. At the age of 13, he had a life-altering event. He was sent to live with an elderly couple on their retired family farm in Iowa in order to distance himself from the trauma of inner city life. It was there, in the middle of Iowa, on this farm, while riding his bicycle through the sunlit cornfields, he heard the voice of God speaking to him. And through this experience, this inner voice has revealed itself to him throughout his entire life.

The Test is a powerful revelation given to heal the chaotic confusion that is in our world today. It is an attempt to awaken the soul to the loving vibration within us. Clearly saying, Be not afraid, I shall love you forever!

About the Book

It is morning. The sun is shining through your bedroom window. You hear the alarm clock ringing, and the birds are chirping outside. You try with all of your strength to move, but you are held in place upon your bed by a force you cannot explain. A voice is speaking to you in a faintly audible sound. You are terrified by what is happening, but you cannot move. The voice becomes louder until it is the only sound you can hear in the room. And then, suddenly, everything is swept away into blackness, and you can no longer see anything. You hear the voice again saying, You have been assigned to take The Test.

Contents

~We called you here today~

~Commitment ~ In Giving Service to Others~

~Breaking the Cycle of Abuse~

~The Blue Bicycle~

~Learning to release fear is learning to release love~

~The Angel with One Wing~

~Traveling on the road to destruction~

~Holding On To Your Green Patch~

~Epilogue~

~We called you here today~

We called you here today to speak to you personally. Our identity has been revealed to you many times. We have been called the, I Am, the Divine Consciousness, the Spiritual Awakening, the Inward Prayer, the Inward Voice, the All-Seeing Eye, the Everlasting Father. We are all of these things and much more. We watched you move through your life in a dormant, uninspired state. And it was so heartbreaking and troubling to see one of our best living creations dissolve into a disgusted and fallen attempt at living. And like a broken bicycle wheel, you have just limped along blaming everyone for your misery and constant whining.

We tried to speak to you this morning, hoping that you would finally pray, but you would not get out of the bed. Then we decided to speak to your spirit, but you shut down and said that you did not want to be bothered. So, we had to interrupt you today. We have rearranged your schedule so that you could take The Test. We have watched your anger and your insistence on blaming others…your wife, your husband, your children, your boss, and your friends for not advancing and moving you forward. For you decided that they were all holding you back, causing you to be miserable and irritated with life. You called out to us many times in anger, wanting to retry everything again. You even became angry at us for making such a terrible disaster of everything.

Now, you are lying in the bed with the alarm clock going off, but you cannot get up. Something is terribly wrong. Your outbursts, your temper, your total lack of compassion for others has caused us to keep you in the bed this morning. We know you cannot get up. You have been trying ever since the alarm clock went off. Well, you need to know the news before you realize it for yourself. You died last night in your sleep. We tried to stop you, but it was the continuum downward spiral that would cause you to do something so selfish and hate-driven that there was no turning back. You overdosed on the bottle of prescription pills that you shoved into your mouth because you were too drunk and angry or both to even care. And now we are deciding if we should wake you up.

Don’t go pleading with us to come back. We heard everything you have said before. Like, it was only an accident and that you did not realize what you were doing. Right? Well, we don’t buy that argument anymore. Just like the time you tried taking your life by working three jobs until you fell asleep behind the wheel of your car and drove off the Lake Manataka Bridge. That day we had one of our people there to save you. A young man who had just gotten his Lifeguard license, saw you go off the bridge. He dived into the murky water, brought up your lifeless body and revived you. With your first breaths, you started screaming and saying that you didn’t want to live anymore. He tried praying with you, but you fought him off saying that you wanted nothing to do with that God nonsense.

And we remember when you bought the 45-caliber from the sporting goods store for the protection of your family you said. But we remember how you loaded it with live ammunition when you were alone and despondent. You convinced yourself that you were just playing as you turned the spindle around the chamber, pointing the barrel at your temple and pulled the trigger. But you did not know that we caused the gun to jam so that it would not go off. We have saved you many other countless times.

And now you want to come back and repeat the same miserable routine all over again. So, we decided that it was time for you to take The Test. The Test is given to those who have depleted themselves of compassion and concern for others. If you don’t take this Test, you may never wake up and there would be no use in bringing you back. This Test is taken with your spirit. Even as you lay in the bed, you can answer and review all the questions that will be presented to you. You will see situations and people presented before you as if you were there. It will be like watching a movie being presented to you. But you will be powerless to interact or speak with anyone. And at the end of each situation, you will be given a series of questions to answer. Please be advised! These are real people on the earth right now that are going through these situations that you will be witnessing. And what you do with the situations that will be presented before you will have real-life outcomes. For everything is connected. You must know every merciful prayer creates a consciousness that can change even the physical world around you. So, the situations that will be presented before you are very real indeed. You will only be an observer. You will listen and watch the situations that will be presented before you. Like a movie that we control, we will stop and start it and allow you to make the ultimate decisions. What you do will have consequences good and bad that will affect the lives of people somewhere on the earth.

You will be given a Test at the end of each scenario. How you answer the questions will determine the impact that it will have upon others. Be careful how you answer for your choices will determine everything.

When you are ready to continue, please let us know. Or you can remain where you are, empty and lifeless, waiting for the alarm clock to stop and wake you up.

~Commitment ~ In Giving Service to Others~

Julie Ann Montclair stood in the enormous auditorium. Her large brown eyes appeared to be aglow, watching the graduates walking across the huge stage in the downtown city arena. She was preparing to graduate from the city’s nursing college. It had been a most challenging task. Four long years that pushed her mind, body, and nerves to the point of breaking. But she had succeeded with the help of her mother, who was somewhere in the audience.

Her mother supported her and helped finance education. She worked two jobs. First, she worked as a waitress during the day. Then, she cleaned floors during the night in a large office building until her knees and legs swelled. Walking became extremely difficult and painful for her. Later, she was diagnosed with a progressing stage of multiple sclerosis that left her immobile, and consequently, in a wheelchair. So, when Julie walked across the large stage, even in this arena with hundreds of people seated, she still managed to spot her mother. Before accepting the coveted degree, she turned around and blew her a kiss as tears welled up in her eyes and blurred her vision.

In just a few more days she would be 26 years old. She had never been married and didn’t have a life after deciding to become a nurse. She simply wanted to help others. It was this force of caring that had always been within her. Even as a child, she would find an injured bird in the park and bring it home to try her best to nurse it back to health. There was also the time that her mother found her in her bedroom where she had created a sick room for her dolls by bandaging them up and giving them tablespoons full of imaginary medicine.

When the Chancellor pronounced his last words, Ladies and Gentleman, I present to you the Nursing Class of Auburn University! a great roar erupted from the hallway that caused all the graduates to spontaneously throw their graduation caps into the air. It created a kaleidoscope of color in the arena as a final signal to the world that their hard work and the efforts of those that loved them had truly paid off. The crowd turned into mayhem after the graduation as thousands of cameras flashed all around the room. Elated families searched to embrace the new young nurses.

The lives of the nursing students have now been radically changed forever as they prepared to enter their new and exciting careers. As students, they had now become lifelong friends. So, they embraced while taking impromptu pictures together, holding their degrees in their hands, they yelled out, Yes we did it! We made it! They said we couldn’t do it, but we did it! There were family members carrying flowers, gifts, and cards to bestow upon the graduates from every direction in the arena.

A group of noisy friends called out to her, Hey, Julie! We really did it! We are nurses! Tess, a young, pretty, brown-skinned African American girl, who had become best friends with her, was among them. Julie never had a friend like Tess before. She was brilliant and so beautiful that many young would-be Doctors begged to go out with her as she walked around the campus. But she, like herself, was too focused on her studies to have a life outside of school. Julie knew she would have given up and flunked out, if Tess had not burned the midnight oil with her. She made sure that she understood some of the most difficult questions dealing with the anatomy and medical terminology. Without Tess, she would not have walked across that stage with a newfound confidence and ability.

Julie’s mother taught her to believe that all people are important and that the earth had no boundaries that the power of love could not cross. In nursing school, she began to understand those teachings from her mother. For she encountered people from every culture, race, and religion from many different countries. It was as if she was experiencing the classroom of the world, a sort of United Nations of humanity. They were all mostly young people like herself going forward, preparing to heal the hurt of others in some small manner, making a significant difference in the world. Hey, Julie, I want you to meet my Mom and Dad! Tess said, beaming like a lighthouse as her mother held her so tightly as if she thought she was going to disappear from her sight. This is my Mom and Dad. They are the greatest!, Tess said as her mother adjusted her long beautiful cornrows that fell down her neck. So, this is the young lady that I heard so much about. She is beautiful, Tess, just like you said! Well, if it wasn’t for this doggone, long, red hair that makes me stand out like a street sign, I would be normal looking!, Julie said laughing. I am the only one in my family that has red hair. I don’t know where this came from! She continued as she stood laughing with them. Tess’s mother looked at her and then hugged her smiling, And you have the most beautiful freckles! Yeah, I know. I want to go back to the room where God was passing out body parts and tell him he did not have to give me the Orphan Annie look! Julie said laughing. On the serious side, I could not have made it in college without this young lady. She kept me going, drinking Starbucks, and pouring over books with me in the middle of the night. She will be my friend for life! And that’s for sure! Nobody is going to break us up!

Julie then searched with a sense of urgency that suddenly now overwhelmed her because she had not found that one person who was so instrumental in helping her receive her degree. She made her meals and worked herself to the bone so that she could stand courageously on that stage. Then she finally saw her mother who looked at her from a distance with loving and tear-filled eyes. She quickly dismissed herself, but not before Tess whispered in her ear, You are going to the after party tonight, right? It is going to be bonkers! Those crazy doctors we met during ordination are going to be there. It is going to be the bomb! I will see you later.

Julie finally found her mother. She was in her wheelchair unable to move. She ran towards her with her arms outstretched and tears streaming down her face. She had done it! She completed her degree and had already accepted a position at the Mount Vernon General Hospital, in the city of Lakewood, California, where she would be starting in about a week. It was all working out flawlessly and according to plan. Everything was moving along perfectly, except her mother was not supposed to get sick like this and break down. It was wrong, so very wrong. She secretly blamed herself, wondering if she had not left home to attend college and earn her degree, perhaps she would have been alright. Deep inside, Julie was hurting. She could not let go of that feeling, even though she tried so very hard. Perhaps, even God was wrong, allowing her mother to become paralyzed and slowly lose her ability to move freely. She did not deserve this. God should not have allowed it. The hurt was overwhelming her at times. The doctors said that there was no cure. She wished that she could have stayed home now to spend more time with her. If it were not for the visiting nurse, she would have been in a more debilitating condition. That nurse helped her mother with her meals and did light exercises with her as well. This was something Julie believed that she was supposed to be doing. And now, Julie would have to leave her again, working at her new hospital job, and still not spending the quality time with her that she deserved. It just didn’t seem right that a merciful God would allow something like this to happen to her.

Julie now ran to her, through the crowd, losing one of her high heels in the sea of people. She did not even go back to look for it. She ran towards her, falling on her knees, covering her wheelchair with her arms, weeping, saying, Mother we did it! We did it. I am a real nurse! Thank you so much! She held on to her for a long time while her Aunt Betty stood by the wheelchair, wiping away a few tears of her own. Finally, after calming down, everyone took a million pictures as she held up her Nursing degree, smiling like a Cheshire Cat. More cousins and uncles surrounded her, covering her with flowers, cards, and presents that overloaded her hands with their kindness. In the distance, she heard a voice from a group of nurses yelling out to her, Julie, aren’t you coming to the after party tonight? Natalie’s father bought her a brand-new convertible, so we are going to pile in right now! We are all going on a joy ride before we crash the doctors’ party! You are going, aren’t you? You don’t want to waste a good time! It is about time we had some fun! And girl, we deserve it! Julie honestly wanted to go and told Tess that she was going. She felt that she had left her mother long enough. She simply wanted to spend some quality time with her. I don’t know! I want to stay home tonight and be with my Mom. I just want to stay home and think about this beautiful moment with her! I will pass on the party tonight! Maybe another time!

Her Mother tried to stand up, pulling herself up in her wheelchair before sitting back down and rapidly jerking on her arm. You better go! It’s about time you had some fun. I will be alright! I am a big girl and you know I can take care of myself! I will be waiting on you when you come home. Mother, don’t you stay up, alright! I will be alright. I want you to get a good night’s sleep. I am not an old woman in a nursing home yet! You go on with your friends. I will be waiting for you when you get home! And who knows, there might be a little surprise waiting for you. It might be pretty late when I come home, so don’t you stay up late! You deserve to have some fun in your life, Julie. You worked so hard. You are still a young woman! Tonight, is your night! So, go find those Doctors and bring one of them home! Her mother said laughing and playfully spanking her from the behind. Julie reached down and hugged her tightly, kissed her on the neck, and turned towards her laughing friends. Girls in a convertible sound dangerously fun to me! One of her giggling friends called back to her, Those crazy guys, who are studying to be doctors, have a pool in their rental house. It is going to be totally banging and the biggest outdoor bash of the year! You are coming aren’t you, Julie? I am ready to have some fun!

The giggling nurses joined together and disappeared in a laughing group through the crowd of people. Betty reached down, hugged Emma, and said in a quiet voice, You did a great job raising that child of yours all by yourself. You should be so proud of yourself. Emma reached up and hugged her tightly, and said, If you had not helped me after I got sick, I would not have made it! Julie always wanted to help people. God has given her the opportunity to do just that. That child of yours is one determined person, just like her mother!, Betty said laughing as her eyes welled up with tears.

It was late when Julie came home, so she quietly tried to open the front door and sneaked in. She saw her mother sleeping in the front room in her wheelchair while the television was still on. It was a crazy party. It was almost 5am when she got home. But the party lived up to everything they said it would be, which included some of the would-be doctors swimming in the pool in their underwear, and in turn, pushing the other people in. The party eventually turned into a gigantic pool party with everyone dancing in the pool in their clothes. It was so much fun! Julie forgot all about the daily grind that she endured earning her degree, and for just a moment, life was indeed fun once again.

When she opened the door, she saw an assortment of cakes, cookies, and delicious looking sandwiches which had been prepared for her. In addition to that, taped up over the entrance of the room, was a large sign with streamers, and balloons hanging from it that read, Happy Graduation to the Nurse that is my Daughter! There was also a toy nurse’s bag on the table with an assortment of gifts that were beautifully wrapped with her name on it. She tried so hard not to wake her mother up as she crept around the room, looking at the beautiful decorations.

Her heart fluttered after she stood looking at everything. She noticed that the room had a slight chill in it, so she found a blanket and gently wrapped it around her mother. Unexpectedly, her mother awakened and smiled sweetly at her. Julie reached over and stroked her hair, kissed her on the cheek, and said, You know you did not have to wait up for me all night. And look at what you did! I don’t know how you walked around the room with your swollen knees and you know your body is going to start to ache tomorrow. Well, I put a little something together. She said smiling as a beacon of light lit all aglow over her. You know every time you use your walker, your legs start to ache! Well, I thought you were a nurse! People in my condition must keep moving. It’s good for the circulation. Well, I guess you are right about that! Everything does look delicious! And you know what? I sure am hungry! I thought you might be., she said chuckling to herself. I know it was very hard for you when Dad was killed in Afghanistan. I was merely a toddler and you became a single mom. I just want you to know how much I appreciate everything that you have done for me! I know you do, Honey! You know words cannot replace the love that is in my heart! For love knows no distance, no barrier, and it is always alive for you inside of me. Julie reached over and hugged her tightly. Then she quickly wiped away a tear. Honey, I hope you had a good time last night. Julie started laughing again, It was the wildest party that I had ever been to in my life! Then she turned around and started making herself a plate of the turkey, ham and cheese sandwiches that adorned the table. Munching on a handful of the oatmeal cookies, she went on to say, There was this want-to-be Doctor that picked me up and threw me into their backyard pool with all of my clothes on! Is that why you look like a wrinkled cat!, her mother said grinning. Yeah, that’s why!, Julie said as she stood looking at herself, wringing her damp clothes. Well, I am glad you came home in one piece. The nerve of that young man, throwing my baby girl in a swimming pool with all of your clothes on too! Yeah, but I got him back, Mom! I pushed him in when he least expected it! And I must say, revenge was indeed sweet! Well, you should be ashamed too! But you know what? He deserved it! They both started laughing as they gave each other a high five. Julie started munching down all the treats that were on the table and opened a few gifts that consisted of sweaters, house shoes, makeup, and perfume. You know you really went all out! I hope you did not blow your budget. I didn’t, Honey! But this is a once in a lifetime event! And you have to splurge a little sometimes!

Julie looked around the room. The rooms looked so small as if everything had been reduced to some sort of miniature dollhouse. When she was growing up, she believed that her house was so enormous and the world was not big enough to fit into the rooms. And now she felt it more than ever. She would be moving away, leaving the old house. It was only a matter of time. Everything was becoming new. It was like she was passing through a time warp. She was changing inside and there was something more she needed to do. She did not know exactly what it was, but there was calling her to leave everything one day.

It was late in the afternoon when her mother entered her room, tickling her feet, saying, Hey, wake up sleepy head! Something arrived for you today. It looks like it’s from some sort of volunteer nursing organization. She laid the letter on the front of her bed. Julie was just waking up and felt like she could have slept through the whole day, but she was glad that her mother had awakened her because she had many errands to run before she started her new job. As she looked at the letter, there appeared to be a dozen or more pictures of nurses helping children and sick people in Sudan in some sort of refugee camp. Printed on the flap of the envelope were the words, If you are looking for real rewards, this is it. She opened the letter which began with the first sentence congratulating her for becoming a nurse. The letter continued to suggest that she needed to consider working as a volunteer in Sudan, helping people that needed emergency care. She read the letter. Dozens of pictures that fell out of it. The nurses in the photos seemed to be about her age. They appeared to be helping people with all kinds of sicknesses that required medical care. The condition seemed hopeless and desperate. There appeared to be thousands of people surrounding the medical volunteers in the dust and heat that formed a huge line of humanity, receiving some type of vaccinations. She took the photos, threw them off the bed, and said, Africa? Who is going there? Somebody must be out of their minds if they think I am going to Africa! I have enough to deal with trying to pay back my student loan debt and making ends meet. Who can afford to go to Africa? Laughing, she pulled the covers over her head and tried to get a little more sleep before she ran all the different errands that she had to do.

The first week at the Mount Vernon General Hospital was a lot harder than she would have ever imagined. The onslaught of trauma cases overloaded her sense of being disciplined and focused. A gang was having a clash in the city with a rival gang. Bodies started filling up the emergency room where she and Tess were working together. Girl, I have never seen anything like this before! There are so many young people in here tonight. I never thought that the first two weeks on the job would be so intense. Tess said as she was running down the hallway with a plastic bag of blood. She continued since she only had a few seconds to talk with Julie, I never anticipated that I would see so many people practically dying in my arms. This is so sad. I talked to an older man and his wife in the emergency room. I didn’t know how to tell them that their son had died only minutes before they arrived with a gunshot wound to his chest. I just never thought that the first two weeks on the job would be this intense! Wiping away tears and sweat from her face, she continued, I think I might quit. This is too much for me! I can’t go on anymore. I am taking these problems home with me. They did not tell me all about this in school. I even had to pray with some family members. How can we not resist getting involved in these lives and not feel anything or internalize their pain? We are just human beings. This is too much for me! "I know! Julie exclaimed. I found myself bawling like a baby when a young man died the other day. He called out to me to help him, but it was too late. The family members embraced me as if I was a part of their family too! I feel like I need a break already, and I just got here. I didn’t know what I signed up for. But I do know where we can go, Africa. Where?" Tess asked. Africa! Julie said laughing. Girl, I have enough problems right here in this hospital to deal with. There are enough people dying here that need my help! I wish they would stop sending those letters to me. But if you are planning on going, then I might have to change my mind., Tess replied. Look, I have worked too hard to get my degree to be working for free anywhere in the world! And I demand a certain level of comfort. I suffered enough with you, eating all those packets of Ramen Noodles in college trying to survive. And I need my hair done every other week. I am trying to make my life a little easier from now on! And besides, it costs a lot of money to keep this face looking exciting and fresh! Tess said laughing. Yeah, you’re right about that! What a waste our lives would be eating bugs, rice, and living in a tent in the middle of nowhere. Do you want to know what I think? I think we should both go to Las Vegas for our first vacation. We can schedule it together and have a blast there!

As the weeks carried on, Julie could not stop thinking about Africa, especially when she started receiving letters from some of the people from the refugee camps in Sudan. The letters arrived in plain white envelopes with no forwarding address. They were written by someone that appeared to have problems writing in English. But the letters were legible. The letters started to arrive at the house on a weekly basis. The letters were disturbing and caused her to wonder how someone that she had never met knew so much about her. It must have been some kind of scam, she thought. How could the person, who was writing to her every week, know so many personal details about her? One of the letters read something like this:

Dear, Julie

My name is Raphael. I am one of the official guardians, appointed officer of the city. We are like your United Nations but on a higher level. We assist people in times of great need and disasters. Very few know we even exist. But we are here, moving secretly and sometimes even within the circumstances in the lives of the people. We exist only to do what we can. We reached out to you today because we know your heart. We felt your love for those that are hurting and sick, even though these people are thousands of miles away. Zuri and his wife Sheena had lived in one of the small settlements just outside the city of the Sudan. They loved each other greatly. Although they were but humble farmers, they could survive by growing crops and raising cattle. But a civil war has broken out that has affected their lives. The civil war has ravaged the city. Many have lost their very lives. No one can be safe living there anymore. The soldiers arrived the other day and immediately killed Zuri execution style. They searched through the house before burning it down, looking for more people that may have lived there. Sheena, the wife of Zuri, and their two children could escape because Zuri sacrificed his life. Sheena and her two children are currently in the desert plains, walking without food and water trying to reach the medical hospital mission some 300 miles away. Sheena’s son Nafari is sick. He has been coughing and burning up with a terrible fever as he staggers in the blowing dust and heat. He also has a large gash on his leg. It has been bleeding profusely during most of the journey. Sheena wrapped the gash by tearing off a piece of her dress, trying her best to keep the blood from flowing down his leg. But he has lost so much blood, he might not be able to finish the journey. Her fragile one-year-old daughter Marla is lying in her arms bundled with rags in a sling draped over her neck. She doesn’t cry anymore. She is too weak and malnourished to even raise her tiny head. She is barely breathing, and she doesn’t have food or water. There is no certainty that she will survive either. They are still a long way off from reaching the medical hospital mission. Will you be there when they arrive? They are counting on you for their survival. Perhaps you and Tess can plan your vacation at another time. God will show you what he wants you to do. But I believe this is your purpose. You must come and help them. For delay, could mean certain death for all of them. Please, Julie. You must come to help. They need you, Julie. So many are waiting for you to help them.

Raphael

The letter devastated Julie. How did this person know so many personal details about she and Tess’s vacation plans for Las Vegas? The letters always arrived in a plain vanilla envelope with no forwarding address, and with the same scribbly, elementary handwriting. The forwarding address simply said, Sudan. Julie told Tess about the letter. Tess couldn’t believe that something like this could be happening. She suggested that Julie should contact the organization that sent the first letter that she received with the photos, inviting her to come to Africa. Tess was angry and worried about her own safety. She began explaining to Julie her own perception of what she believed was happening. "Girl, this is some scary stuff! Someone is getting your