The Rose Villa

Chapter 1

Riviera, France

December 1918

Flora Garvie stood on the cliff top gazing down at the Mediterranean, glimmering like frayed silk. The daylight was fading now as the sun set over the horizon.

‘For heaven’s sake, Flo, don’t stand so close to the edge,’ warned Maudie Wallace, hovering behind her. Her friend meant well by visiting so soon, but Flora needed space to be alone with her grief.

‘I’m fine, don’t fuss,’ Flora snapped. ‘Isn’t it beautiful? So blue, so calm, and the sun is like a golden ball.’ The lightness and colours soothed her dry eyes but she felt thirsty. The stash of sedatives she had hoarded gave her dreamless sleep, helping to calm her spirit, but they also dried her mouth.

Maudie strode ahead along the path to the beautiful villa with its pink sugar-almond stucco walls and pretty terrace draped with foliage, now a convalescent home for sick nurses and other medical staff.

I must be getting better, Flora thought as they walked back to the villa. Colours were brightening, no longer dull and grey. Even at this time of year, the villa was full of sunlight, with its open windows, lush oriental carpets and the kind of antique furniture seen only in the best houses in Glasgow. Her bedroom was palatial, with an en-suite bathroom with a roll-top bath. The December warmth was comforting to the invalids. It was as if the war had touched nothing here; only the odd sightings of crippled men with sticks staggering out on their constitutional and a posse of basket chairs catching the last rays of daylight served as a reminder. As she sat amongst the last of the bougainvillea, her former life seemed like a far-off dream. It filled her with guilt to think that other nurses must be taking her place while she was surrounded by such luxury. She must return north so some other worn-out VAD could experience this, too. The worst cases stayed here for weeks or months and sometimes their next posting would be a suitable asylum or discreet home for broken nurses whose hold on reality slipped away into a nightmare of hallucination or self-harm.

That could have been me, she sighed, but for the eagle eyes of Sister and the MO. Exhaustion from night and day duty on the ambulance trains takes many forms. In her case the inability of her septic finger to heal had weakened her very core. Now from her balcony she stared out over the bay, empty of all feeling. Where was the girl who had been so full of hope and energy? She slouched against the cushions of her lounger. I feel like a sick war horse. The memory of those deserted beasts, left to rot or shot by the sides of the railway tracks, haunted her. Why am I feeling so useless?

Flora lay back in the chair, the walk back along the cliff path had exhausted her. She must fight this sloth and find the fighting spirit lost somewhere in the hospital tents of Flanders.

An hour later she was woken by a knock. ‘Only me!’ Maudie shouted. ‘Time for afternoon tea.’

It was good of Maudie to give up some of her precious leave to come here to chivvy her up. She’d found a smart pension close by and was in no hurry to head home. ‘Had a letter from my chum, Olive. She’s coming down to join us. Won’t that be fun?’

Flora nodded more out of duty than enthusiasm. Trust Olive Buckle to barge in on their reunion but it would be mean to deny Maudie’s chum some Riviera sunshine.

‘And talking of fun, there’s a notice downstairs inviting you to a musical soirée at the officers’ hotel up the road tonight. We are their guests, sounds rather jolly. All the nurses were deciding what to wear, until Matron announced it was strict uniform code. Come along, they’ve got some super pastries in the Conservatory.’

‘I need a bath,’ Flora replied, knowing she was not ready to join the others yet.

Sinking into the warm tub, sprinkled with perfumed bath salts, was one of the most luxurious ways to relax. After years of hospital stink, washing in freezing tents, never feeling clean, this was a time to shut out the world and soak away the glums. She loved the privacy, the scents of vanilla, rose and lavender. She dunked her hair, rinsing it with a cold tea and rosemary concoction, drying it as best she could. Now it was cut shorter it dried quicker but still must be hidden under her cap.

Maudie had made herself at home. Being a senior nurse now, she knew just how hard their lives had been. Flora dressed quickly and went to join Maudie, finding her scoffing some nibbles laid out on the drawing room table. Flora had found eating difficult when she first arrived, used as she was to skipping meals and snacking on the run. Now she was tasting flavours again, feeling the sensations at the back of her throat without gagging. She was looking forward to a large glass of Bordeaux with their evening dinner. Her appetite was returning at last; the sea air, the view, the rest calming her troubled spirit.

Chapter 2

The concert party consisted of a violinist, an accordion player and a pianist playing some ragtime music, thumping out the rhythm on a grand piano. Toes were tapping, as it was music for dancing, but rules were strict. No fraternising with nurses in uniform, and Matron was keeping a wary eye on her girls.

There was a festive air because it would soon be the first Christmas since the Armistice. Flora searched the room for familiar faces from ambulance trains, but most of her former patients had been too sick and had returned to Blighty.

The usual smoky fug was wafting like mist and there was still a tinge of hospital in the hotel corridors. This was a convalescent home, like the Rose Villa, with a sense of weariness, masked by false jollity, too-loud laughter. The pianist stood up to let someone else tinkle the ivories and then a lone voice croaked a rendition of ‘Loch Lomond’.

By yon bonnie braes and by yon bonnie banks

Where the sun shines bright on Loch Lomond.

Where me and my true love will ever wont to gae…

They all joined in the chorus:

Ye’ll tak the high road and I’ll tak the low road…

The singer was slightly out of tune but emotion swelled up in Flora as she thought of home outside Glasgow. She couldn’t see the soloist. He must be from one of the Scots regiments. When he finished, they all cheered. ‘Well done, Padre.’

The crowd parted to reveal a tall man with a crop of auburn hair who now turned away, embarrassed at this attention.

‘Good Lord, look who it is!’ Maudie made to rush to greet him, but Flora held her back.

‘Not now.’

‘Why ever not?’ Maudie shook off her hand. ‘Kit Carlyle, how good to see you!’

‘Miss Wallace, what are you doing here?’

‘Visiting Flora Garvie in the nurses’ villa… Where she’s got to now…’

Flora was already disappearing into the crowd in the dining room surrounded by nurses filling their plates. She didn’t want to see Kit, not yet. He was too close a reminder. He was Fergus’s friend not hers. He was a ghost from the past. But there was no hiding place and Maudie was pushing Kit forward to follow her. ‘Isn’t this wonderful; a kent face. Of all the places to greet one of our very own. How are you?’ Maudie laughed.

He was staring at Flora with those piercing blue-grey eyes she recalled so well.

‘Maud says you have been unwell,’ he said, with that concerned padre look she recognised so well from innumerable hospital visits.

‘Fine now, and you?’

‘Oh, just a bout of this influenza, left a bit of muck on my chest. They think the sea air will straighten it out.’ The schoolboy who had thrashed them all at tennis at Kildowie House was gone. In his place was a man with sunken cheeks, a scar on his cheek, hair greying at the temples and heavy-looking eyes. ‘Glasgow seems a long way away. I did get back once. Did you? Are your family well?’ he said.

Flora sensed the effort to be polite. ‘I had no chance to get back.’ That was a blatant lie. How could she face her family after her brother was killed?

‘It was unsettling to see life going on as normal,’ Kit added. ‘Where are you both stationed?’

‘I was in a base hospital but Flora was on the trains, weren’t you?’ Maudie replied. ‘Must grab some grub before it vanishes,’ she said, determined to leave them alone.

‘I thought I saw you once on a train after the push at Amiens,’ Kit whispered once they were alone.

‘Yes, it was me and I recognised you on the platform trying your best to get a stretcher case on to the train.’ Flora saw his eyes give a warning as Maudie began to advance back in their direction.

‘Does she know it was her brother I was trying to help?’

‘No, and she won’t from me. She took comfort in your letter.’

‘How hard it is to tell the real truth to relatives. Why have they sent you down here?’

‘Like you, a bout of something nasty that wouldn’t heal and I was able to escort some other sick nurses here.’

‘How good to see someone from home.’ His hand reached out to touch her, but she quickly stepped back, changing the subject. ‘How is Muriel Armour-Brown?’ She was the minister’s daughter he had been walking out with.

‘Fine, the last time I heard from her. She’s busy in the church.’ An officer barged in between them. ‘I say, Padre, let’s have another sing-song and get the girls to join in.’

Kit ignored him, his eyes never leaving her face. ‘Are you here for long?’

‘Not sure,’ she replied.

‘Come on, you two, if you talk any longer, Matron will be on to you. She’s been hovering in the doorway. Come and join the feast.’

‘Not hungry.’ Flora paused to shake Kit’s hand. ‘Nice to meet you again. Glad you recovered when so many didn’t.’ Flora found herself retreating, pausing only to speak to Matron. ‘The padre was one of my late brother’s best friends. Only two of them have survived. There was so much to catch up on.’

Why was she making excuses for a casual conversation? Why was seeing him so unsettling? Kit was from the past, from those golden days before war tore everything apart. If only he were Fergus…

*

When the concert was over, Kit stood out on a balcony smoking his last cigarette while dawn crept slowly into the darkness and the first orange light rose from the sea. He hadn’t slept; too much booze, too many people. The singing had forced the last dregs of cheer from him. The songs of home brought only a sad nostalgia. He belonged on the battlefield among his men and now that, too, was gone. Seeing Flora and Maud had brought home how out of touch he was with women; even his own girl, Muriel, had not written for weeks and when her letters did come, they were filled with news of people he no longer cared about or knew.

Who would want this burnt-out shell of a priest who had lost the last shreds of belief down in the mud of the trenches? The lines of scared but battle-hardened men living daily with the putrid odour of death was the only world he had known for years. His dreams were filled with the bodies of young men rotting under grey blankets, piled high for burial like dead cattle. How could it not have left him numb? His only wish now was to crawl into a hole to find some peace.

Flora Garvie’s unexpected presence unnerved him. Here was a girl who knew him as he once was. The shipbuilder’s daughter had changed too, the innocence of her youth long lost. She looked so like her brother, Fergus, square-jawed, with glossy dark hair, and those deep dark eyes. Her eyes looked as if she could see right into his soul, full of pity and warmth.

Pull yourself together, Carlyle, life goes on. It was just a chance meeting, he told himself. Yet, deep down, he knew he would see her again. He sensed she, of all people, would understand how much he had changed. Her company might cheer his troubled spirit.

Chapter 3

The note from Kit, inviting them to take tea somewhere in town, was a surprise. Flora was not sure how to respond, knowing Matron must inspect it before giving approval. There were strict rules about visiting officers unless they were relatives. Maudie would chaperone, of course. The fact he was a family friend and a chaplain would surely persuade Matron their virtue would be safe.

Matron gave her consent on the understanding it must be for a short time only and in daylight. Flora sent a reply saying they would be shopping and suggested a hotel close to where Maudie was staying.

‘I say, he didn’t waste much time. He looks as if he could do with a hearty meal, never mind afternoon tea. I never thought of Kit as skinny. He does look very distinguished though. I want to buy some presents. Olive will be arriving soon and I want to show her the sights. You won’t mind being alone with him. I know you never liked him that much.’

Why should Maudie make such a comment? Flora found herself defending her brother’s friend. ‘He’s changed from the boy we once knew. I think he needs cheering up.’

‘Flo, you’re wasted as a mere VAD, you have such a knack of seeing right into people. I noticed you in the villa, talking with those nervous invalids and listening to their woes.’

Flora was surprised. ‘We all do it, it’s part of our work.’ How many hours had they both spent holding the hands of young lads who would never see their loved ones again? Sometimes those faces merged in her dreams, into a man in pain calling to his mother, clinging to her fingers until the worst was over.

‘Meet you by the parfumerie to buy some bits and pieces to take home,’ Maudie suggested.

‘Don’t you be long, I daren’t go unchaperoned. Someone is bound to see me alone with a man in uniform.’ For some reason Flora was feeling nervous.

He was waiting outside the hotel and guided Flora to a terrace facing the sea. ‘Maudie won’t be long,’ she said, suddenly feeling exposed in daylight. How pale he looked now. His eyes sunken and his cheek twitching. The stitches had barely been taken from his scar. He was dressed in full uniform with a dog collar. She, in turn, had made the effort to coil her hair loosely under her boater, which she wore to shade her face from the winter sunlight.

‘Miss Garvie, thank you for coming.’

‘Flora, please, we’ve known each other since I was in pigtails. We’re off duty…’

‘Why did you need to run away last night?’

‘I didn’t,’ she said, shocked by his directness. ‘I was tired and it was a surprise to see you again after all this time.’

‘We never seemed to hit it off, did we?’ Kit replied.

Flora smiled, recalling how she had teased him and called him bookish. She had been jealous of his friendship with her brother. ‘Seeing you like that reminded me of Bertie and Hector thumping balls on our tennis court. How you all came to the house and took over and we girls didn’t get a chance to play. I don’t suppose you ever noticed.’

‘I do recall you scowling at me a time or two.’ Kit smiled and his face lit up.

‘Silly the things we remember, and it’s all so far away now.’ Flora sighed. ‘At least the war is over.’

‘Is it? The war is only over for the dead. I fear for many of us it’s just beginning.’ He turned away from her to stare out at the view.

‘What do you mean?’

‘Coming to terms with all we have lost, returning home where we will be expected to pick up where we left off and move forward…’

‘I see what you mean but at least you have Muriel who will surely be anxious to see you again?’

‘I’m not sure she’ll want the man I’ve become – a smoker, an imbiber who prefers the company of unbelievers to Holy Joes.’

Flora could hear the bitterness in his words. ‘I’m sure Muriel will understand after all you’ve been through.’

Kit turned back to Flora. ‘I gather from your father you were a witness to the terrible Quintinshill train disaster where your brother…’ Kit shook his head, unable to continue, but Flora nodded.

‘I was lucky, my carriage was at the rear, we walked off the train unharmed but others were not so fortunate. I had no idea until… We did what we could… It was such a comfort to my family to know you were there for Fergus.’ How could she forget the carnage, the flames and the cries of wounded soldiers? She had done what little she could to help them. How strange they were both at the scene.

‘He died bravely trying to help others. But why are we talking of such sad things?’ Kit took her gloved hand and this time she let it stay within a tender grip that shook her with its power. ‘You have such kind eyes for someone who’s witnessed so much. To go into that hell and back, survive when so many good men didn’t, well, it leaves its mark.’

‘Surely your fellow chaplains have some comfort to offer on this matter?’ Flora could see his despair and it frightened her. His defences were so weakened, revealing an exhaustion of the nervous system that was oh, so familiar. In some ways it was like looking in a mirror. ‘I’m not sure I’m qualified to talk on spiritual matters or anything much.’

‘They sent you down from the front line to rest but it’s hard to leave it behind. I feel it like a sack of stones on my shoulders.’

This intimate talk was not right and Flora got up to leave but then sat down again. How could she walk away? Fergus would never forgive her. ‘I will be leaving here soon. There’s so much work to do before we have a true peace. There are still months to go on my contract.’

‘We chaplains are free agents, in some ways,’ Kit replied. ‘I know there’s a congregation in Kelvinside waiting for this hero to return… if I return.’

Flora was shocked at this honesty. ‘They will be grateful to see you safely back in the fold, especially Muriel.’

‘Sorry to prattle on like this. I think only of myself these days. Forgive me for speaking out of turn. You will have a loving family to greet you. The Garvies always made us so welcome at Kildowie House.’

Suddenly Maudie appeared, striding towards their table. ‘Look who’s turned up early. This is my chum, Olive, from Dumbarton, no less… the Reverend Kit Carlyle, friend of Bertie and Flora’s brother. Sorry we’re late. I went to the station to check some times and there she was…’

Olive was wearing thick tweeds and carrying a portmanteau. She looked as if she was here for the duration. Flora found her uninvited presence intrusive but she was Maudie’s friend not hers. ‘Do sit down,’ she said, smiling.

‘Yes, do join us,’ said Kit. ‘Look, I’ve had an idea. Why don’t I borrow a chap’s roadster and drive you all round the coastline to see the scenery? The views are spectacular. We can find a beach for a picnic if it’s not too cold. It will be like old times.’

No, it won’t, Flora thought, but she was relieved by this sudden change of mood. ‘Sounds jolly but Matron will have to approve. Perhaps next week, in case I’m sent north and another sick nurse needs my bed.’

‘Super-duper,’ Maudie added. ‘You mustn’t go before Christmas, Flo…’

They chatted for a while before Kit stood to take his leave, claiming a pressing engagement. Maudie turned to Olive. ‘He is rather splendid, isn’t he?’

Olive shrugged. ‘Can’t stand some of these padres, a waste of space in my book, getting in the way, preaching platitudes.’

Flora wanted to protest. Olive didn’t know Kit at all and he was being so kind. In his uniform, with a battle scar, he did look rather splendid but she was no longer sure she could see him in a black gown with white tabs, behind a pulpit.

Chapter 4

A week later Kit dreamt a familiar haunting dream. He could hear the screams of a drowning man, a man he couldn’t reach, however hard he crawled across the mud to find him.

‘Hold on, lad, I’m coming for you!’ he was shouting but the gunfire obliterated his words. He woke screaming and cursing. Why could he not find the boy? His nightmares were like hangovers that lingered all day. No amount of whisky could blot them out.

He rose early for a morning stroll along the beach where his feet took him towards the steps of the rose-pink villa. He was searching for a glimpse of Flora.

He had caught a brief sight of her at a choir rehearsal but with no opportunity to talk. He could not get her out of his mind. She had such soulful dark eyes, as she listened intently to all his nonsense. He was the one who ought to be listening, comforting, an example of good faith. Somehow her presence calmed his restlessness. He tried to be a cheery chappie in the mess but he was tired of the act.When he was with Flora, he could be more himself.

Kit turned towards the grey water with its hard metallic sheen and found himself staring into the waves. He could see his friends kicking a ball, rested, laughing, free now from any pain or the stench of death. They didn’t notice him as he sniffed the salt air and waved, only the lap of the waves on his boots made any sound. ‘You are one of the lucky ones,’ they seemed to say and for that he must be grateful. Had he been of any use with his Bibles, medical bags and cigarettes? The countless dead were the lucky ones, he thought, over there on that far distant shore.

True, he had a comfortable billet, three good meals a day and plenty of company to while away the hours. The other men seemed intent on getting themselves fit to go home to wives and children. They were lucky, too.

He had no one in particular except his senior kirk minister, Andrew, with a daughter who they all thought would make him a good manse wife. He couldn’t even recall Muriel’s face.

‘You’re a padre with nothing to give, a burnt-out shell,’ he whispered to himself. The band of brothers he once knew was gone, left behind him years ago in that first flush of gallantry and derring-do. They were the unlucky ones, schoolboys thrown into the furnace of war.

Kit felt the water soaking into his boots and stepped back. A voice was calling him back. He turned to see Flora racing down the steps, hair flying.

‘What on earth are you doing?’

‘Just testing the water to see if I dare take a dip,’ he lied.

‘It’s freezing, even in the Med. You gave me a fright. I opened my curtains to see you walking into the waves.’

‘You have a fine view from the villa, very picturesque.’ Kit tried to change the subject but Flora was having none of it.

‘Look at the state of you – soaking, and your boots are sodden,’ she chided.

‘Walk with me,’ he said.

‘You know the rules, I can’t.’

‘But you will, won’t you?’ he said, drinking in her wild hair and scarlet cheeks.

Flora smiled. ‘Just for a few minutes.’

‘Talking to you has made me think. If this war was fought for anything, it was for the freedom to live useful, fruitful lives without fear of being subjected to the domination of others. We know there must never be another war like this and yet it has accelerated so many scientific inventions, machines, ways of treating the sick. There’s a new era coming and I’ve realised that preaching has only a small place in a padre’s toolbox. For example, one night there were no rations and I went out to forage and found a pig. Don’t ask me how,’ Kit laughed. ‘There was a butcher in our ranks so he did the necessary and we roasted it over a fire, the best meal for weeks. The men listened to me after that. It’s what you do that counts, not what you say.’

‘Deeds not Words! our Suffrage motto.’

‘Ah yes, you, Rose Murray and Maudie screamed that in our faces often enough on the tennis court. We laughed at you and you at us… Flora, you’re such wonderful company. You chase the black thoughts away.’ Kit clutched her hand but she shook it away.

‘Not now, not here…’

‘Then where? We never got a chance to talk when I took you all on the scenic tour. That Olive never stopped butting in… Now that we’ve found each other after all these years, there’s so much to discuss, don’t you think?’

‘I’m sorry, Kit, it’s just not possible. People might see us together. There are rules. We never got to thank you for giving us such a wonderful afternoon. I’m sorry. You must think me ungrateful.

It will be Christmas soon. You will be busy taking services and I have Maudie and Olive to entertain, as well as visiting my sick nurses. There’ll be a party and you’ll all be invited. We can be friends, of course, but no more, not here.’ Flora hesitated. ‘I have a reputation to guard.’

‘Why are you being so sensible?’

Flora paused turning back towards the villa. ‘No more walking into the sea nonsense. Pull yourself together, shape up and forget any of these soppy conversations or I’ll ask to be transferred.’ Flora gave him one of her stern ‘Votes for Women’ looks.

Kit grinned. ‘You’re a cruel woman but you’d make a good wife, guarding the manse door…’

Flora stormed off, laughing. ‘No, I would not!’

Chapter 5

The Christmas party was in full swing in the large drawing room of Rose Villa. All the nurses were laughing at each other’s makeshift costumes; girls dressed as tommies, footballers, Christmas fairies with tinsel wings, wise men and shepherds. Even Matron had made an effort to disguise herself. The proposed afternoon tea had grown into a full-scale party so there had been a flurry of sewing and borrowing. ‘Olive will come as a pirate,’ Maudie had announced. ‘I’m going as an Egyptian mummy wrapped in bandages.’

‘All I’ve got is a silk dressing gown,’ said Flora.

‘If you pile up your hair, put a knitting needle through it and whiten your face with powder, wrap a scarf like a sash with a bow, you can go as a Japanese geisha,’ Maudie suggested.

Earlier in the day the nurses had been busy making presents for each other: Dorothy bags full of soaps and chocolates, embroidered handkerchiefs sent from England, little bits of home to give cheer and hope. In town, Flora found a beautifully shaped bottle of perfume for Maudie, who adored the scent of roses, and lace-edged hankies for the others in the group. She even bought a fine cigar to give to Kit Carlyle. It was going to be a memorable evening and she wanted to thank him for taking the trouble to escort them around the coast.

It was strange how she kept coming back to the sight of Kit walking into the waves, knowing she just had to chase after him. He was so much more interesting than she recalled back home. She had snuck into the service where he was preaching and found his sermon thought provoking, by no means dull. She was hoping he would come to their gathering tonight. Would he ever wear the kilt again? She hoped so.

I shouldn’t be thinking about Kit in this way, she reflected. It was making her cheeks blush. Now it was time to return to her tasks.

The sickest nurses were still confined to barracks, busy making paper chains. Flora felt a fraud as her poisonous