Empower Your Self-Esteem: Nurture Your Self-Worth, Build Emotional Resilience, and Cultivate Lasting Joy with the Power of Positive Self-Talk: Pathways to Mastery Series, #12

Introduction: Empower Your Self-Esteem

Self-esteem is a powerful force within each of us... Self-esteem is the experience that we are appropriate to life and the requirements of life.

Nathaniel Branden

NOTE TO MY READERS: This book has the power to be a powerful beacon of positivity and transformation in your life by simply helping you realize and nurture your self-worth. Use it well to begin the journey to unlocking your true power.

If you are reading this book, it is because you either have a low sense of self-worth or struggle with rebuilding and maintaining healthy self-esteem.

I want you to know that it is okay to feel that way. You are not alone on this journey. That said, you have the power to feel better and to be better in all ways, and with this guide, I am committed to helping you achieve that.

As you read through this book, you will realize that self-esteem is vital to living a happy, fulfilling, and balanced life.

Quite often, we complain about how our life isn’t good enough, how we struggle to find peace of mind, or how others are doing well while we feel and seem stuck where we were years ago.

If you dig deeper into these issues to find the root cause, you will discover that the problem comes from not feeling worthy enough. When we don’t like ourselves or who we are, we find problems in everything, even everyone around us.

We cannot pursue our passions, follow through with our goals, do things that bring us joy, and feel peaceful because, deep down, we just aren’t happy with ourselves.

A negative self-view is a serious issue because how you see and value yourself significantly affects your mood, feelings, mindset, attitude, behavior, and actions. Well, simply put, it influences your entire life. So, it is something that needs your utmost attention.

But first, let me ask you this...

What do you think of when you hear the word self-esteem?

I’m sure we all have an idea of what this means. Simply stated, it is what we think, feel and believe about ourselves. However, it really isn’t as simple as that. An important thing to know is that there are many factors that influence self-esteem at any given time in your life and it can fluctuate throughout your lifetime.

Self-esteem is composed of the thoughts, feelings, and beliefs we hold about ourselves. Since our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs change constantly, our self-esteem is continually evolving.Having low self-esteem can harm your mental health, relationships, and school or career life. However, there are several ways to feel better about yourself and boost your self-esteem.

The things that lower our self-esteem can be different for everyone. Difficult life experiences can typically be a factor, such as abuse as a child or an adult, relationship problems, financial issues, or physical health problems. Also, how you treat yourself can influence your self-esteem, such as how you talk to yourself (self-talk), criticizing yourself, and seeing yourself as not important 

In this book—Empower Your Self-Esteem— I will teach you the greatest ways to raise your self-esteem so that you are feeling absolutely great and with limitless potential in your life. As a result of following through and building self-esteem in your life, you will begin to feel better, look better, and respond better to your environment and in relationships.

With this book, you have the power to build your self-esteem, but you need guidance, a gentle nudge, and inner motivation to stay true to this path.

This gentle nudge is precisely where this guide serves its purpose. It is a consciously crafted blueprint that aims to help you understand self-esteem. It provides actionable, clearly explained, easy-to-follow guidelines and strategies to build and grow your self-esteem and empower you.

Here is what you will discover in this book:

✓  An evaluation of the self-esteem spectrum

✓  The difference between narcissism and self-esteem

✓  The Importance of self-esteem on mental health, physical well-being, work, productivity, relationships, success, and life in general

✓  Low self-esteem and, how its vicious cycle affects your life

✓  The different myths surrounding self-esteem

✓  How positive self-talk builds and boosts your self-esteem

✓  The significance of self-love, what it truly means, and how to nurture it

✓  Why you need to embrace your individuality and how to do it

✓  Constructive ways to handle criticism without hurting your self-esteem

✓  The mind-body connection and its effect on self-esteem

✓  How mindfulness is a powerful tool in fostering self-esteem

✓  Strategies to cultivate mindfulness to augment your self-worth

✓  The link between stress and self-esteem and positive ways to manage stress

✓  The importance of healthy relationships on your self-worth

✓  Strategies to distinguish between toxic and healthy relationships and how to break the former while cultivating the latter

✓  Self-esteem and reclaiming your inner power

✓  The power of goal setting, along with strategies to set and objectify your meaningful goals

✓  Why you need to adopt a lifelong learning attitude and how to do it

✓  The important role of creativity in shaping your self-worth

✓  The power of gratitude, its relation to self-esteem, and strategies to become more grateful

✓  Why and how to empower others to improve your self-worth

✓  Spirituality and its role in the self-esteem equation

✓  The need to heal past wounds along with actionable ways to do so

✓  The true meaning of resilience, its relation to self-esteem, and ways to become more resilient

✓  How to monitor your performance, learn from setbacks, and journey through life while becoming better every day

You will find all these aspects covered in the different chapters of this book, which I wrote with a lot of love, care, and experience. I have endeavored to write every chapter in a manner that educates you about the concept covered in it and then takes you on a step-by-step journey to implement it in your life.

For instance, if you are in the chapter about mindfulness and self-esteem, I will walk you through mindfulness and its beautiful relationship with self-esteem, so you understand the need to become more mindful. Following that, you will learn simple but amazingly powerful strategies that help make mindfulness a daily part of your life.

All the chapters are interconnected to ensure everything flows seamlessly, but you can skip to the most relevant chapter based on your circumstances. For example, if you have time constraints and need to focus more on building healthy relationships to grow your self-esteem, you can skim through the initial chapters or skip them and jump right to the one centered on relationships.

Overall, this book can provide you with a comprehensive understanding of self-esteem and offer practical and actionable advice for improving your self-esteem and living a happier, more fulfilling life.

Let’s get started with the journey. Before moving on, please read the following sentence and say it aloud five times.

I am the measure of my worth, and I say I am worthy.

Go on—repeat it five times loudly.

Now, take a deep breath and tune into how you feel. You are feeling a tad bit better than before, right? Be honest, please. Even if you feel the same, acknowledge that. At least you are not feeling worse. If you keep repeating this sentence, you will start feeling good because this affirmation breathes self-esteem into you.

Whether you struggle with low self-esteem or simply want to boost your confidence and self-worth, this book offers practical and actionable advice for improving your self-esteem and living a happier, more fulfilling life.

With the understanding that you alone determine your self-worth, let us move on and begin the greatest training you have ever invested in.

I hope you enjoy this book, and learn how to build unbreakable self-esteem in your life from today to last a lifetime!

Scott Allan

www.scottallanbooks.com

Chapter 1: Unraveling the Essence of Self-Esteem

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

Eleanor Roosevelt

A

big reason many of us don't work on our self-esteem is because we don't really understand it. Most of us do not learn it in school and have no other way to learn about it. Also, many of us didn't hear talks or discussions about this important aspect when we were growing up.

As sad as this reality is, it's never too late to learn, so let's start with the basics. In this opening chapter, we'll delve into self-esteem to demystify its nature and distinguish it from closely related terms such as self-confidence and narcissism.

By the end of this chapter, you will have a good understanding of the basic aspects of self-esteem.

But first, what is self-esteem?

Self-esteem is more than just a buzzword; it's a fundamental element of our psyche that shapes our daily lives. When you think of self-esteem, think of it as the lens through which you see yourself. The internal narrative whispers encouragement or criticism, guiding your actions, reactions, and decisions.

At its core, self-esteem is about self-perception. It is how you value yourself, both internally and in relation to the world around you. For example, saying things like I feel good about myself, I don't like myself, I know I can do this, and I'll never get through the problems in my life reflect your self-esteem.

Think of self-esteem as your inner compass. When properly calibrated, it points you toward self-knowledge and guides you toward understanding your worth and abilities. This inner voice tells you, You can do this, or You are enough, even when faced with challenges.

Please understand that healthy self-esteem is not about believing you're above others. It is about recognizing your unique value and not allowing yourself to be undervalued or mistreated.

On the other hand, if your self-esteem is low, this compass can lead you astray. You may find yourself constantly battling self-doubt, questioning your decisions, or being overly critical of your actions. It is okay to criticize yourself from time to time. I mean, we've all gone through times when things have taken a turn for the worse and we ended up saying, "Man, I never do things the right way.

However, if this feeling persists, and you question your value and your ability to do things well in almost everything, and you are overly critical of yourself, you are only demeaning yourself. This persistent self-criticism isn't just a passing phase. It can become a significant obstacle to your progress in various facets of your life, whether personal, professional, or social.

Self-esteem is important to understand because it is dynamic, not static. It fluctuates based on experience, feedback, and internal dialogue. However, with awareness and conscious effort, you can nurture and maintain a healthy level of self-esteem, ensuring that it serves as a positive force in your life.

But what shapes this sense of self? Many factors come into play, from past experiences and personal accomplishments to societal norms and cultural influences.

Our environment, the media we watch, the people we meet, and the interactions we have all shape how we perceive ourselves. In addition, our societies have set different benchmarks for worthiness, success, adequacy, and happiness. When we fall short of these benchmarks, we feel inadequate, which affects our self-esteem.

Self-esteem has two very important components: self-love and self-competence. To understand the true nature of self-esteem and then to build it, it is crucial to understand these two elements:

The Two Components of Self-Esteem

Your self-esteem comes from loving yourself and feeling adequate, or better known as self-competence.

Let's get a better understanding of these two concepts.

Self-Competence

Self-competence refers to an inner sense of competence and adequacy. It means that you feel competent and know that you can do the things you want to do. Competence is related to feeling motivated. When you feel motivated to achieve a goal, you are willing to go the extra mile to fight and overcome the obstacles that come your way.

To value yourself, you need to work on feeling competent enough. This feeling comes from doing things you enjoy, not giving up in the face of adversity, and having a can-do attitude.

Self-love

Self-love refers to accepting yourself as you are and then cultivating a sense of love for yourself. Now don't get me wrong. Self-love does not mean bragging about your shortcomings while resisting self-improvement and evolution.

It is simply being kind to yourself, understanding that you are human and therefore prone to error, and that being imperfect is okay. Instead of belittling yourself for your shortcomings and bad habits such as smoking, procrastination, temper problems, and the like, you accept them as part of your healthy experience as a human being and understand that you need to work on your not-so-good qualities while being kind to yourself.

The ability to love yourself gives you the strength to have compassion for yourself when the going gets tough. Instead of succumbing to the pressures and challenges you face, you calm yourself and find the courage to get back up and try again. As you continue to battle your problems, you continue to cultivate self-competence. Together, self-love and self-competence pave the way for healthy self-esteem.

As mentioned earlier, when you have healthy self-esteem, you love yourself and are proud of yourself.

Now, many people may confuse this with narcissism. So let us look at narcissism and how it differs from having healthy