SRILA BV NARAYANA MAHARAJAS VISIT TO HOLLAND

July 1997
(by Jadurani dasi)
On Tuesday, July 1st , Srila Gurudeva came to visit his disciples in Holland, the Netherlands.
Holland, affectionately called "Holy Land" by him, was his last stopover before returning home
to Mathura on July 10th. The Dutch devotees arranged to rent the beautiful mansion called
Soeria (pronounced Surya), which is situated in the National Park Veluwezoom, a reservational
area of about 200 miles of protected forests and small villages. Soeria is considered by its
countrymen as an international meeting place for courses on spiritual and physical well being,
for people of all backgrounds. In accordance with its name, the great auditory hall where Srila
Gurudeva was lecturing is a soft golden yellow, colored like the sunshine. The building has 80
rooms, 200 beds, and is the oldest health center in Holland. Right on its premises there are water
resources, so that the water from all the taps is pure, just as at the Rupa Sanatana Gaudiya Matha
in Vrndavana. There were about 200 guests during Gurudeva's stay.
Gurudeva wanted us to describe the kitchen facilities: the giant modern kitchen is about fifteen
times as large as the one in Kesavaji Gaudiya Matha in Mathura. It has about ten stove areas, two
refrigerators (one as large as a full room), a large electric cheese-slicer, a huge bread making
room with baking oven, an electric dough-making machine, and a large electric dishwashing
machine. Navina Krsna, Pundarika prabhus and Vrnda didi cooked for Gurudeva in there, and
the other devotees, headed by Jagat bandu prabhu, cooked for all the devotees.
Gurudeva preached daily in the meeting hall, on Sri Brhad-bhagavatamrita by Srila Sanatana
Gosvami; he thus discussed various stages of bhakti and illustrated the philosophy with
narrations and exemplary pastimes and qualities of great devotees like Sankara, Prahlada
Maharaja, Hanuman, the five Pandavas, the Yadavas, Uddhava and the gopis, respectively. He
explained the subtle differences between aropa-siddha-bhakti, sanga-siddha-bhakti and svarupasiddha-bhakti of bhakti. He also explained the different levels of bhakti of the above
personalities on the basis of the verse anyavilasita sunyam by Sri Rupa Gosvami, and he gave a
whole class explaining this verse. He said that without knowing the different levels of bhakti and
bhaktas, one cannot advance in Krsna consciousness.
One of the bhaktins who was initiated in Holland told the following story: "I first met Gurudeva
in France one week ago. Vrnda didi came with me for a personal darsana, and when we walked
into his room he was putting on his tilaka. He turned around, saying: 'Oh, someone is here.' He
looked at Vrnda didi, smiled, and then said: 'Oh, you have a new flower.' Then he looked more
directly at me, and said: 'You are a very beautiful gopi flower, I saw you somewhere before. Yes,
it was in Mathura, when Lokanatha Swami brought his group to our temple on parikrama.' In a
room full of devotees in Mathura I had been standing by the door - and he remembered me. I
asked if I could move to Vrndavana and he answered: 'Yes, you come and live in Vrndavana. I
will help you. Any problem?' I answered: 'Well, I have a problem with drugs.' He answered: 'Just
like a flower; there may be some insects on a flower, but I will remove them, and I will offer that
beautiful flower to Srimati Radhika. I have full faith in you; I will help you.' I thanked him and
said: 'I like you very much.' He immediately replied: 'I like you also.' I didn't know what to say,
but since I had been aspiring for another guru for about five years, I mentioned this to him, and
he answered: 'you should continue to serve him, and ISKCON, I will still help you. I have no self
interest.'

A few days later, in Holland, one day after my initiation, I went to a darsana with a group of
devotees. I was feeling very bad. I thought that it may look to others as if I had rejected the
ISKCON guru whom I had tried my best to serve for five years. I also thought that I didn't really
deserve mercy of our beloved Gurudeva. When I revealed my mind to Gurudeva, he was very
understanding. He asked me if I know the meaning of initiation, and then he replied himself,
since I didn't have an answer: 'Now you are placed at the lotus feet of Krsna. You give yourself
to Him, and He is obligated to give you all protection. He should not give you any problem, not
any problem at all. If He does so, I will go myself to see Him, and I will chastise Him.' Everyone
was laughing. By the way he spoke, I felt like he was cutting through the dirt accumulated from
millions of lifetimes, and making my heart melt. I felt for the first time in my life that this is a
person who really loves me."
Our Godsister Yasasvini also had a memorable darsana with Gurudeva. In her own words: "By
the grace of my diksa guru, His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada, to whom I
prayed for a long period of time to guide me to a shelter he approved of in these turbulent times,
I recently accepted Gurudeva, His Divine Grace Srila Narayana Maharaja as my siksa guru. I
have full faith in Srila Prabhupada, that as our ever well wisher and guide, he has brought me to
his dear friend and siksa disciple Srila Narayana Maharaja, who is also a pure devotee of the
Lord. One is meant to render service and inquire submissively to his diksa and siksa guru, so I
went with my questions, which, although small, were important to me."
"My first one was: 'My small devotee son is very boisterous. Should I make looking after him
my priority, or should I try to do other services as well?' Srila Gurudeva answered: 'Make him a
very qualified devotee and try to make him pure. Give him your time, and that is also your
service. Then he waved his hands in the air and said: 'If more time....' But then he came back to
the same point. 'Make him a good devotee. Teach him everything, and besides that, chant, read
and do bhajana.'"
"My second question was that: 'although I'm supposed to feel low and humble, sometimes my
mind takes over and makes me feel so low that I almost go backwards instead of forwards, and I
want to hide in my room instead of associating properly.' Gurudeva answered: 'You learn A,B,C
and think, "Oh I am doing well and being enthused by others." But after looking at the next
letter, D, you think, "Oh it is hard; I am not doing so well."' Then, in his usual humble and sweet
way, he said: 'Don't worry, you are at the beginning, and in the beginning everyone's mind is like
that -- even mine!' Of course, I know Gurudeva's mind has never been like that, but he
encouraged me by his sweet nature. He knows how to treat each one of us according to our
conditioning, to pull us forward. He then told me the story of a villager who was thinking of
taking sannyasa, but was having second thoughts because he wondered how his family would be
maintained: .'..then he saw that people were coming to a nearby well and daily pulling out the
bucket of water. The buckets were pulled up by ropes, and around the top of the well were
bricks. He noticed that although the ropes were soft next to the hard brick, by constant pulling
over and over again, the brick was being worn away.' So Gurudeva commented: 'Whatever the
mind says, you do your harinama and mantras every day -- strictly. Whatever you are chanting
now, increase that and do very nicely. Then you will soon become strong and powerful.'"
July 5th was the holy day of Gundica marjana, cleansing the Gundica temple. In the morning,
before class, Gurudeva gave a darsana, and about 30 devotees were present in his room.
(Gurudeva's room was itself quite lovely, with its beige raw silk cloth wall-covering [a silk
wallpaper], its thick soft beige wall to wall carpet, the saffron sheets and quilts on his bed-asana,
the soft opulent beige couch, the rich long beige curtains and the newly made altar with
Sevakunja Thakuraji and Tulasidevi. In the room was a particular disciple of his, Krsna Kanta
prabhu, accompanied by his wife, Yogamaya didi. He is an internationally famous popstar, and

sings Krsna conscious songs and traditional bhajanas in front of thousands of people, and
sometimes even hundreds of thousands. Gurudeva was appreciating his large scale preaching
through his musical talents, and told him to teach the world what is real prema. He said that there
must be prema; if you don't love Krsna, then you have to love a boy or girl. If not, then you will
have to love a dog; if there is no dog, then a parrot or a toy deer; and if not, then you'll have to sit
in front of the mirror for hours at a time fixing your hair and face -- in prema. (Gurudeva then
mimicked this in a very humorous way. He can imitate anything, perfectly). "So there must be
prema. if there is no prema, even for the mirror, then that absence of prema will manifest as
anger. Our material prema simply has to be refined to make it real - - for Radha and Krsna."
Gurudeva then told Krsna Kanta prabhu to put these facts in his poetry and songs, in which way
he will be able to help the whole world. As usual, all the devotees in the room were mesmerized.
Srila Maharaja then told everyone about the importance of Gundica Marjana, when thousands of
devotees in India gather every year to clean the Gundica temple in Puri, and lakhs of people are
in Puri for Lord Jagannatha's festival, chanting: "Jaya Jagannatha, Jaya Jagannatha, Jaya
Baladeva, Jaya Subhadra." He said that his Guru Maharaja used to take about five hundred
devotees each year for this, and that he accompanied him about ten times. Then he said that
today he will take one broom and clean here and there, and clean his own heart, and all the
devotees hearts, to make them a good place for Radha and Krsna to sit.
July 6th, Rathayatra Day: Back in New Mayapura, a few days before Rathayatra day, some
French devotees found Lord Jagannatha Deities in one of the old buildings, lying forgotten in a
heap of other paraphernalia. They brought the Deities Jagannatha, Baladeva and Subhadra to
Gurudeva in Holland, and offered Them to him. He requested that They be placed on a new altar
on the stage, just beside his vyasasana.
The next day, July 6th, was Rathayatra. Although every year in Mathura Srila Maharaja holds a
Rathayatra festival and thousands attend, this year he was in Holland, so Lord Jagannatha came
to him there.
During the day there was a fire sacrifice for the devotees who were recently initiated in England,
France and now in Holland. The ceremony was performed by Navina Krsna prabhu, and then
Gurudeva came and led the devotees in chanting mantras and circumambulating the fire arena
with harinama sankirtana. There was also a first grain giving ceremony, for Bhakta Svarupa
prabhu's five month old baby daughter, who, at the given time, chose the Bhagavad Gita from the
various items of paraphernalia, such as toys, coins etc. Gurudeva said this means she will be
attached to Krsna and Gita. The ceremony and Gurudeva's class for that day was televised by an
organization of Hindu media -- mostly from Asia Samaja -- called "Ohm", and will be shown on
Janmastami day in Holland and other countries. Then, in the afternoon there was a beautiful
ratha cart pulling festival - procession, led by Gurudeva.
In both his morning and evening classes, Gurudeva glorified Lord Jagannatha. In the morning he
spoke about the history of Rathyatra from its origin 5,000 years ago, when the gopis met Krsna
at Kuruksetra. He explained how the real chariot was the hearts of the gopis, and by pulling that
heart chariot, they took Krsna back to Vrndavana. He told how Krsna wept when he saw mother
Yasoda at Kuruksetra, calling out to her, "O Mother!" and how He went under her veil, and they
both wept together. He explained how all the gopis also wept when they saw this, and, when
Devaki and Rohini came on the scene, Devaki began to worry because Krsna had never
addressed her like this. In great contrast, He was now in the lap of Yasoda, weeping and calling
out with great love, "Mother, O Mother!"

Gurudeva told how Lord Caitanya, in His pastimes with Lord Jagannatha at the car festival,
reenacted the gopi's meeting with Krsna at Kuruksetra. He told how, during that car festival,
Lord Caitanya met with King Prataparudra, who was dressed as an ordinary person, and who
won His favor by singing to him in a very pathetic tune, the slokas of Gopi Gita.
Gurudeva explained how Krsna, Baladeva and Subhadra got Their shape as Jagannatha when
They were listening to Rohini Ma speak about the glories of Vrndavana and the gopis, in the
assembly of Rukmini and the other queens, accompanied by Padmavati, the mother of Kamsa.
By Rohinidevi's beautiful glorification of the Vrajavasis, her heart melted, and Krsna, Balarama
and Subhadra also melted, and that was how Their arms became short. Narada came at this time,
and saw this amazing sight. He then asked Them to remain in the world in this form, and They
gave him Their blessings. Gurudeva also told the entire story of how Nila Madhava, the beautiful
four armed Deity, became Lord Jagannatha. In this regard he explained the story of King
Indradrumna. At the end of the class he thanked the devotees for helping him celebrate
Rathayatra, since he was not able to hold the function in Mathura. He told them that they will all
have the grace of Lord Jagannatha, and that they should pray to Lord Jagannatha by chanting
Radhika prarthana by Vittalacarya:
syamasundara sikhanda sekhara
smerahasa murlali manohar.
"O Krsna, O Syamasundara, let me serve your beloved, Srimati Radhika, and please make me
her kinkari. I only want to serve Srimati Radhika. I want nothing else. Please write my name on
the register of her kinkaris."
Gurudeva was pouring so much nectar on us. We were amazed by how much energy he was
exhibiting, even in nara lila. He was so energetic, continually going from one event to another.
Navina Krsna prabhu may have had doctor's reports about his health condition, but to us, his
general audience, he appeared to have the energy of a young man.
July 7th We were pleased to have the presence of H. H. Vaisnava Maharaja. (He is a sannyasa
disciple of H.H. Paramadvaiti Swami, who honored us with his two day visit to Costa Rica last
month, spoke with the devotees and translated Gurudeva's lectures into Spanish.) He is most
humble and had some very warm exchanges with Gurudeva. Gurudeva sometimes asked him to
lead kirtana. On this particular evening, he did so by playing his guitar and harmonica, singing
the Hare Krsna mantra in a Bob Dylan-like tune. Gurudeva and the devotees laughed and
clapped, and enjoyed it very much.
Gurudeva then asked Madhavi didi to lead kirtana. She sang "Gauranga bolite habe", after which
Gurudeva spoke about its meaning. He said that if we do kirtana to collect honor or money, the
power of kirtana goes away. We have to know the meanings. "O Krsna, O Gurudeva, I want to
weep when I chant, but really I'm not doing that; so what to do?" "Hari Hari bolite." Our heart
should melt, tears should come, hairs should stand on end, the throat should be choked up; even
without these feelings we should chant and pray: "When will that day come?" If we are not pure
and if we have worldly desires then our heart will not melt. "Visaya cariya." No worldly person
can help us; no so called devotee can help us; even sincere devotees cannot help us if they are
not on a platform to purify our hearts.
After the class Gurudeva saw a play by the children (as, on the previous night he saw two
bharata natyam dances by Indira didi -- Krsna bala lila and kisora lila, which both he and the
devotees enjoyed very much.)

Before giving class each day, on entering the temple hall, Gurudeva would first offer his
dandavat pranams at the altar. On there were five pairs of Radha-Krsna Deities, four GauraNitais, two Jagannathas, two Govardhanas, and a number of salagramas.
As usual, from early morning until late at night Gurudeva had groups of devotees and individual
devotees waiting at his door for group and private darsanas -- and, as usual, he would solve earth
shattering problems in moments.
July 8th turned out to be a very interesting and eventful day. The course of events was originally
set in train by the arrival of Amavasya didi from Germany the day before, who is one of the
coordinators of ISKCON's newly formed anti-child abuse committees. She asked Srila Gurudeva
in a small very early morning darsana the following question: "Srila Prabhupada is a fully selfrealized soul and knows everything. So how could he have allowed all the abuse, sexual,
physical and emotional, to have continued for so many years in ISKCON gurukulas during his
own physical presence?" She went on to say that it seemed to her that if he did know that the
young students, some of whom were only four years old, were being literally tortured by their
teachers, then how could he have visited Dallas in the mid seventies and said that this school was
okay? If he was not aware of the atrocities, how could he be a self-realized soul? And, if he was
aware, then was he not being merciless, to say the least?"
Gurudeva answered softly and gravely, that this was a very deep subject matter and that
Prabhupada of course knew everything, just as Krsna knew that the Yadavas would in the future
become intoxicated by drinking rice wine, and would kill each other. Prabhupada also knew
everything, and he could have stopped them, but he chose not to. He instructed the teachers how
to behave, but they didn't follow him, so they will have to suffer. Gurudeva then said that this
was a very deep subject, and that it required more time to explain. He was scheduled to give
initiations then, so he invited her to see him at another time, so he could explain further. The next
morning Amavasya didi came again and requested him to speak more on the subject. Gurudeva
told her that he would speak about it in class, so that everyone could hear his answer. Later, in
the morning class, from 11am -12 p.m., he glorified pure devotees. He praised Srila Prabhupada,
Srila Sridhara Maharaja and Srila Gour Govinda Maharaja and then he brought up the question
that was asked by Amavasya. He asked the one hundred and fifty devotees in the room to think
about the question, and to have their answers ready for the evening class, at which time he would
also give his answer.
That evening, he called on various senior devotees to stand up and speak. In the discussions
which followed, many points were made. It was explained, for example, that Krsna also
performs activities that are not understood by common men. He does everything for a larger
purpose that only pure devotees can understand. We have to see the broader picture, when
considering the atrocious sufferings in the material world, such as being bombed in Hiroshima,
languishing in the womb for nine months, or becoming meat on someone's dinner plate.
Prabhupada was quoted as having said that when we come in contact with a bonafide guru,
karma is minimized. If, for example, we get our finger cut we should think that our whole arm
should have been amputated, but we are just getting a summary punishment of the law of karma.
The children in gurukula were paying that summary fine, whilst the teachers had, in turn, now
generated abominable karma for themselves. At the same time however, because all the devotees
involved had had the opportunity in this life to associate with bhakti and the pure devotee, it
therefore meant that they possessed the necessary good sukrtis and samskaras from activities
performed in their millions of past births as well, since without them, these devotional aspects of
their lives would not have been possible. Those who did not have enough sukrtis temporarily
became faithless, when obstacles in their bhakti arose as a result of past sins, which manifested

in the form of the deviant teachers, whilst those who had sufficient sukritis were nevertheless
able to continue on the bhakti path.
Everyone waited with anticipation as the last devotee finished speaking, and Srila Gurudeva
prepared to give the summary explanation. He gave the example of how Krsna had allowed the
dice game to happen in Mahabharata. One might ask why He didn't warn the Pandavas not to
play, since He knew how many disasters would come out of it, with, for example, Draupadi
being humiliated in the assembly led by Dusasana and Duryodhana. However, when seen from
an overall perspective, one can understand that without all of this strife and conflict, finally
culminating in the battle of Kuruksetra, the Bhagavad Gita would never have been spoken, for
the eternal benefit of the whole world. He also added that it teaches us the important lesson too:
not to play such games.
There were so many lessons to be learned by us. As we had heard from Gurudeva in his Brhadbhagavatamrta class on the previous day, Draupadi actually never suffered. She is an expansion
of Laksmi; she is Krsna's eternal associate. It would not have made any difference to her whether
she were naked or not. She knew that the real self, the atma, cannot be stripped naked. People
think that they have something to hide, but when they die, and are put in fire, they will ultimately
all be naked. By showing how much faith she had in Krsna, Draupadi wanted to show the
worldly materialists the example that they should aspire to follow.
Why did Yudhisthira Maharaja stop Bhima and his other brothers from protecting Draupadi,
Gurudeva asked us. Because he knew that Krsna was going to act. Gurudeva then said that it is
very difficult to understand uttama-adhikaris. He told us that he himself, as well as Srila
Prabhupada, had come to this world to explain all these tattvas. Why did Krsna lie and say that
Asvattama was dead? Only a rare devotee can really understand that what Krsna said was not a
lie; in fact, it was completely true. All have died in between the teeth of Krsna in His form of
Visvarupa. Even Bhisma and Arjuna had died, and ultimately only Krsna was not dead. Krsna
and His devotees may often act in ways that we conditioned souls think is not correct, but this is
simply our ignorance. He gave the example that if a thorn is in one's foot, one will take it out
with another thorn. Then he told us most emphatically to take this statement very gravely. In the
same way, he told us, Krsna takes thorns (unqualified people), and uses them to pull out other
thorns, and then throws both thorns away. Prabhupada also did the same thing. But the fortunate
thing about these thorns, Gurudeva said, is that they now have impressions, called samskaras,
and these impressions will help them to become pure devotees in the future.
Gurudeva asked his audience to consider hypothetically, why Prabhupada had not warned the
little boys of what was going to happen to them. He then told us that Prabhupada was actually
giving mercy to the whole universe. If those with such bad karma from past lives had not come
to Prabhupada, then they would have simply gone to other schools, and, by that same karma,
they would have suffered much, much more. And, despite the suffering they endured, because
they went to gurukula, they also received many good samskaras, eternal impressions on their
hearts, to help them come to pure bhakti in the future. They saw the Deities, they chanted Hare
Krsna, they took prasadam, they had association with Krsna's pure devotee, and they read
Prabhupada's books. Many of them lived in Vrndavana, and mixed with the dust of Vrndavana.
Such opportunities come only after millions of births of performing sukrti.
Gurudeva then said we should never have any doubt in Krsna - this is the nature of demons.
Dushasana and Duryodhana doubted Him, for instance, asking why He played with the gopis,
singing and dancing with them alone at night. They also questioned why He told lies. But we
have to consider the position of Krsna. Apart from playing with the gopis, He can take
Govardhana and the whole universe in His hand, He can eat poison, and He can eat fire. So if

someone also wants to play with the gopis, then let him first perform such Herculean feats. Then
Srila Gurudeva gave us the example of Lord Rama. Since He was sarvajna, knowing everything,
why did He pursue Marici? Actually, He knew that by pursuing the deer that it would be for the
good of all. Prabhupada preached all over the world to lakhs of drunkards, hippies, meat-eaters,
"boyfriends and girlfriends", and turned so many of them towards bhakti. Gurudeva concluded
that we shouldn't have doubt in Prabhupada or any pure devotee, or in Krsna, or in Rama. He
said that we can also take a lesson not to imitate him; otherwise we will go to hell. First we have
to be Sankara, and then we can drink poison.
Everyone present was overwhelmed by Gurudeva's realized arguments. Amavasya didi, who
originally asked the question, said after class, "Now I finally feel that I have something to tell
those children -- now I feel I can help them."
Indira dasi, who performed the Bharat Natyam dance and also directed the childrens plays and
dances writes the following:
We know that we are not at all qualified in this age of Kali to receive the darsana of such an
elevated soul, what to speak of his initiations. We are incapable of contributing anything to
Gurudeva's pleasure or happiness. Of course, our Guruji is a personal associate of Srimati
Radhika and Sri Krsna. We can only admire him and endeavor to somehow please him by
following his instructions, lectures and mantras. Gurudeva said that if we can do one thousandth
of what Ragunatha dasa Gosvami did, then we can become pure. He also said that if you want to
do bhajana you must earnestly pray for the mercy of Nityananda Prabhu and Rupa Gosvami.
In one evening class, Gurudeva told the story of Lord Caitanya's renunciation and love of Krsna
in his household life. He spoke about the Lord's final night at home before jumping into the icy
waves of the Ganges, and he described His swimming to Kantak Nagar at midnight to take
sannyasa.
In discussing the subsequent separation of Visnu Priya, Gurudeva said, "We should do bhajana
like her. She constantly wept, chanting Hare Krsna, feeling separation from Lord Caitanya, and
counting her rounds on grains of rice." He then told us about the bhajana of the six Gosvamis.
Chanting not less than one lakh daily, they gave up their kingly wealth and became like beggars,
eating plain chickpeas and sleeping under the trees at night.