mystarjob.

com, saturday 29 March 2014 

THE POWER OF
By IMRAN HASHIM
[email protected]

W VulnERaBIlITy
OULD you be comfortable
spending the entire day at
work just reading a book?
Honestly, when was the
last time you saw anyone
in the office spending an entire day just
reading a book?
And if you were in that position, would
you feel any tinge of uneasiness since you
might think others might perceive you as InsIgHTs FROm DaRIng gREaTly: HOW THE COuRagE TO BE
slacking off? You might have a clue how it
feels. Vulnerable. Almost shameful.
VulnERaBlE TRansFORms THE Way WE lIVE, lOVE, PaREnT, anD lEaD
That was precisely what I felt as I spent
an entire day at the office common area helps that there’s a happy ending to the Brown. In essence, life can be better lived somewhere.
reading Daring Greatly: How the Courage to premise: Vulnerability leads to happiness. when you learn to manage vulnerability, a The solution is to practise gratitude, to
Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Here are some insights from the book: catalyst for courage and connection. acknowledge and to celebrate the good
Love, Parent, and Lead by Brené Brown. But To achieve this, there are certain aspects things in life as they happen. Enjoy the
I was reading it with an additional purpose,
that is, in order to write this article.
Rather fittingly, I discovered how
1 Beware of
never enough
“We’re afraid that our truth isn’t enough
in life that we need to work on:
l Let go of what people think.
l Let go of perfectionism.
moment and silence the sceptics within.
Striving for perfectionism all the time is
another shield we put on. Not only can it
exposed it felt to not be in front of my – that what we have to offer isn’t enough l Let go of numbing and be self-destructive, an addiction to it can
laptop, but instead snuggling up to cosy without the bells and whistles, without powerlessness. put a considerable strain on everyone.
sofa and oversized pillows all to myself (We editing, and impressing.” l Let go of scarcity and There is no shame in accepting that
have a rather next-gen workplace). Observe your organisation. Chances are fear of the dark. things may not turn out picture perfect
In a normal office setting, that would be you can identify the over achievers simply l Let go of the need for certainty. all the time. Yes, public perception might
unimaginable and downright unproduc- by their rigor and tenacity in getting things l Let go of comparison. paint you in a different light but you might
tive. And a sure fire way for disciplinary done. You might even be one yourself. It’s l Let go of exhaustion as a status sym- want to take a pause and agree when it’s
action. But reading about vulnerability an elite status that can possibly harbour bol and productivity as self-worth. enough.
gave me the surprising courage to do it. benefits. People generally look for you l Let go of anxiety Previous experience of shame and anxi-
The gist of the book us is that shame can because you’re capable. as a life-style. ety can also lead us to block or disconnect
only truly dissipate by being allowing your- Be wary of the potential side effects l Let go of self-doubt and our emotions. It is another form of shield,
self to be vulnerable. Slightly ironic, but it though. Our desire to achieve more, often “supposed to.” one that is damaging to our relationships
at all cost, can be a ticking bomb. We can l Let go of being cool and as we lose touch of real emotions.
never feel enough, and that is why we “always in control.” This type of numbing removes our abil-
always keep going. ity to empathise with discomfort and deal
The same doggedness is a one way ticket Notice that all these address our innate with thoughts and behaviours. As humans,
to high pressure, rapid burnout that will human needs. This resonates even more we need to feel our feelings.
eventually cause health complications and if you put yourself as a parent raising chil- In all honesty, the book dives deeper
deteriorating quality of life. dren. than what is explored in this article. The
Whether you realise it or not, there is While there is the desire to provide and research on vulnerability and shame is dif-
a shift in the social climate, which Brown ensure your child can be his or her very ficult, and Brown has done a terrific service
calls a culture of scarcity. It is a perva- best, the tendency to shape the future of to anyone and everyone looking to face
sive sense that enough is never your child according to your own defined their inner demons, or “gremlins” as she
enough. image can be less than helpful. put it.
Things like entertain- Similar inclination might occur at the Instead of silencing them, “shame resil-
ment shape and influ- workplace, in a personal relationship, or ience” is important to fully engage in life,
ence our perception even life in general. The key to whole- relationships, and enthusiasm for our work.
of what is popular. hearted living is to live authentically, not as Daring Greatly is a timely reminder of
Picture perfect a projection or expectation of others. the need to talk about shame. Above that,
celebrities make Self-worth and “wholehearted” living it offers valuable insights on how we deal
“normal” people comes from accepting we need to have with shame in society, relationships, fami-
feel inferior. courage, compassion with ourselves and lies and at work.
It is unfortunate other people, and connection. It is well researched and gives guide-
that it leads us to lines for how we can manage shame and
compare our person-
al values with people
who are not even
3 uncovering
vulneraBility shields
Growing up, we gradually learned to shield
develop shame resilience by identifying the
difference between shame and guilt, and
finding ways to realise when we are sham-
remotely similar to us. ourselves from being exposed, being vul- ing ourselves or others, or when others are
Our fear of not being nerable, projecting an armour of emotional shaming us.
enough is what makes us guards. We think that it protects us from
model after people who we being hurt or disappointed. The fear of n Imran Hashim is a talent acceleration
perceive as superior. We lose being vilified seems to justify this, but manager with Leaderonomics. In the course
sense of ourselves, and it can be unfortunately it works only one way. of writing this piece, he experienced great
harmful to people around us. As a Brown asserts that there is a paradox vulnerability, but for good measure. Luckily,
leader, or a team leader, or a parent, in this; we do our best to hide our shame, the advice in the book helped him to open
we need to be okay when we fall short. but it is the very first thing we look for in up and be comfortable with it. To learn
others. more about Leaderonomics, contact peo-

2 wholehearted living
Compassion, connection, and cour-
age. These things are the epitome of
Our shields are a mere defence mecha-
nism from revealing our true selves.
Instead of embracing joy, our inner cynics
[email protected].
Daring Greatly by Brené Brown is distributed
by Penguin Books Malaysia and is available
wholehearted living as advocated by start to believe something will go wrong in all leading bookstores.

Kuala lumPuR COnVEnTIOn CEnTRE RIsIng TO InTERnaTIOnal sTanDaRDs

By STEPHANIE HO tional fabric. Perhaps due to all these initia- pipeline. The first cohort consists of 25 team “Overall, the TAP participants have
[email protected] tives, the organisation enjoys an employee members across various functions within embraced the programme enthusiastically,
turnover rate of less than 2% annually. the organisation. and management has high hopes for them
KUALA Lumpur Convention Centre (the The Centre encourages training and devel- The programme places priority on and expects to see them succeed and move
Centre) which opened it’s doors in June opment so employees can grow both profes- developing people leadership skills, with towards greater heights,” he says.
2005 is a nine -year-old establishment with sionally and personally. Last November, it elements of strategy and business acumen “I truly believe that our team is our
a strong team of 320 employees. Striving to launched its Talent Acceleration Programme also infused. It aims to elevate the readiness most valuable asset. Without them, our
be an “Employer of Choice”, it is constantly (TAP), an 18-month fast-track programme and leadership capacity of upcoming centre achievements would not have been pos-
pushing barriers with various employee ini- for high potentials individuals at the leaders. sible. Moving forward, they must continue
tiatives and platforms. managerial, assistant managerial and senior Though only four months into the pro- to deliver value to repeat and new clients
These include an open-door communica- executive level. gramme, general manager Datuk Peter through innovative product offerings and
tion policy, internal focus groups aiming to The talent acceleration programme for Brokenshire already observes increased world class service, an approach that has
refine practised policies and procedures, and the Centre has been specially crafted with energy levels in the participants, and an kept them at the forefront of people’s minds
a culture of recognition and performance the objective of accelerating the growth of enhanced ability to grasp opportunities at and continues to give them that competitive
incentives deeply ingrained in the organisa- high potentials in line with the leadership the workplace. edge,” says Brokenshire.