Faith Journey Paper-3

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Faith, Religion, and Society

Dr. Dave

Hope Creamer

September 6th, 2016

Open Mindedly Confused

Growing up, I was told to say I was Catholic. My brothers and I went to CCD every

Sunday in early elementary school to receive our first communion and go through our first

confession. My mother is not religious in any sense and my father claims he is religious but we

never really went to church unless it was for a wedding or funeral. I have come to the

conclusion that my dad makes these religious claims to appease the older generations of the

family, however I will probably never know for sure. I don’t mean to come off bitter, but it’s a

frustrating topic for me.

I have absolutely no solid idea or way I lean towards when it comes to my religious

beliefs. Maybe it’s because my experiences with religion weren’t really the best so to speak. It’s

complicated and frustrating because parts of me want to believe in a greater power and an

afterlife, but other parts of me are skeptical. I would say I’m the type of person who requires

proof in order to completely believe something. I am open minded when it comes to different

beliefs because I find it intriguing, but I don’t necessarily follow the beliefs. I don’t particularly

have the Catholic beliefs I was raised with, but I don’t lack them either. It’s sort of a strange in

between that I can’t quite grasp. I don’t mind feeling this way about beliefs because I think it

makes me even more accepting and open minded to what others say and have faith in. I enjoy

learning about them.


Considering I don’t have any set in stone beliefs, when difficult times come around I find

other ways to cope and work through. Really just talking to my friends or my mom about

whatever is going on seem to help me the most. Sometimes I feel as though people use religion

as an excuse to do something wrong and then depend on their beliefs to set things right. For

example, if someone cheats on their significant other and then goes to confession and expects

to be forgiven. I am not saying this is always the case, it’s just the ugly realization from my

personal experience with religion. Every once in a while, especially through difficult times, I will

have the urge to ask God or whatever the higher power is, to help end the painful time. When I

was in fifth grade, my little brother Timmy was diagnosed with cancer, lymphoma to be exact.

He was just in first grade at the time and even though I was also very young I knew it was an

extremely serious illness. Back then, I had a little bit more of a religious mindset because I was

10 and didn’t really think have my own opinions yet. I would ask God every single night to get

him better. I am happy to say that he is now a healthy 9th grader and after seven years of

remission he was considered cured. That was the scariest time I can remember and not long

after my brother went into remission, my parents got divorced and at the same time my

grandma was fighting a losing battle of Ovarian cancer. I don’t want to say “How can’t there be

a God?” if he let all this happen to our family at once because that isn’t fair. I am a strong

believer in everything happening for a reason, both good and bad. I guess my point here is I

don’t blame a higher power for the bad and I don’t rely on a higher power for the good.

I am finding it difficult to answer these questions because of the confusion I have about

my own beliefs. When it comes to having a sense of purpose, I don’t necessarily think it’s

because of religious beliefs but rather believing in myself in general. I feel as though I’m always
working harder to better myself whether it’s on the soccer field or as a person in general. My

favorite quote of all time and that I live by is “I believe in the person I want to become,” by Lana

Del Rey who happens to be one of my favorite singers. As an art therapy major, I want to help

people in a psychological manner and I believe that constantly bettering myself will make result

in me being able to help others to the best of my abilities.

The key people in my life who have really shaped me as a person in both positive and

negative ways are my parents. My mom being a more positive influence because of her open

mindedness and accepting personality. My dad being a little on the negative side because of his

constant pushing of his beliefs on me. I feel I have become a very independent person even

though I’m only 18 and a very good judgment of right from wrong because I have seen a lot of

both in my life. I am proud of who I am and that can be the most difficult thing for some. I feel

as though my beliefs will become more pronounced and solid with time and experience and I

am completely okay with that.

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