KeepItShutStudyGuide 819405
KeepItShutStudyGuide 819405
KeepItShutStudyGuide 819405
Notes
Words are powerful and they have consequences.
• It cannot be tamed.
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Luke 6:45 states that the mouth speaks what the heart is already full of.
We need to learn to “mind our spillage.”
In our homes, often the problem isn’t how we talk about our family
members but rather how we talk to them.
Our tongues are fire. From where will they be lit: above or below? Are
our words a sword or a salve?
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1. What part of the video teaching had the most impact on you?
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4. King David penned the words to Psalm 15. Have someone read this
psalm aloud to the group. In the space below, record as many obser-
vations as you can about what is mentioned about our words. Num-
ber them as well to see how many you can come up with.
• Are there any guidelines you can draw out of this passage
for how we can use our words wisely in the future? Can you
think of a specific example that pertains to a current, real-life
situation?
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5. What is one insight you gained from the small group activity about
Psalm 15 and the picture it paints of how we should use our words?
6. In the video segment, Karen described the Black Forest fire in Colo-
rado in 2013. She also referred to James 3:2 – 6 and how in it James
likens our tongue to fire. What insights did you get out of this anal-
ogy of fire? What similarities can you draw between the reality of fire
and the effects of our words?
7. Karen talked about how her and her husband’s opposite personalities
and different styles of completing tasks can cause conflict and clash-
ing. Do you live or work with someone who either has a polar oppo-
site personality or does things in a way you never would? Does this
ever make you use your words in a wrong manner? If so, how?
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9. Time to flip your thinking! Instead of just “unloading” the next time
you may be angry about someone’s actions or irritated at the way he
or she approaches situations, give yourself a little pep talk while you
pause and ponder. List some things you might say to yourself to avoid
saying something permanently painful just because you are temporar-
ily ticked off.
10. “Are your words a sword or a salve?” Ouch! What does this word
picture bring to mind when you read it? Can you think of anyone
you know whose words seem to be a salve instead of a sword? Give an
example. How do you feel when you are around them?
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Now go back and put a star in front of the one or two areas where
you most feel God may be prompting you to change how you behave
when it comes to your speech.
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2. In chapter one of Keep It Shut, Karen writes this about James 3:6:
The passage in James also talks about how the tongue can
corrupt our whole body. I myself know very well from the
times I have wished I could take back my words; often my
whole body is affected. My mind races with regret. My heart
pounds. My stomach churns and becomes tied up in knots
as I fret and stress over what now might happen. My fingers
fidget, and I can’t seem to concentrate. Sometimes my feet
pace as I ponder what I possibly can do now to get myself out
of the royal mess I now find myself in.
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• Have you ever felt this way? If so, describe the situation here:
• How does this concept of our whole body being affected when we
misuse our tongue tie into what James says in chapter 3, the last part
of verse 2? Write what that portion of Scripture says here:
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• The ESV and NIV versions of the Bible use the word perfect in
James 3:2. The HCSB translation uses the word mature. The
original Greek word used here is teleios. It is an adjective that
means full-grown, complete, having reached maturity, especially as
it relates to character. Does knowing the background of this word
shed any new light on what you think this verse means?
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Child
_________________________
Child
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Child
_________________________
Child
_________________________
Child
_________________________
Family member
_________________________
Family member
_________________________
Family member
_________________________
Family member
_________________________
Coworker
_________________________
Coworker
_________________________
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_________________________
Friend
_________________________
Friend
_________________________
Friend
_________________________
Friend
_________________________
Online words (social media,
blog comments)
Church/civic situation
Church/civic situation
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What do you learn from the preceding exercise? Do you see any
commonalties?
3. What stands out to you most about the way Joseph behaved when it
comes to the words he uttered or even the times he remained silent?
Did you learn anything new that you hadn’t discovered about him
before? If so, record it briefly in the space below.
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4. Karen also listed several cues we can take from Joseph’s life. Which
most resonated with you? Checkmark any that apply and then, in the
space provided, record why it jumped out at you. What is taking place
in your life currently that made that particular statement speak to you
right now?
Don’t be God.
Do be nice.
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Now go back and place a star in front of the statement you most want
to work on this next week. For added effect, write the statement on a sticky
note and post it somewhere you will be sure to see it (your bathroom mirror,
on your desk, on the dashboard of your car, etc.). Or set a calendar reminder
on your phone for a few days from now with the particular phrase written
out. When it pops up, do a quick self-evaluation to see how you are doing
with regards to that principle from the life of Joseph.
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6. Look up the following Bible passages. After each, write how it speaks
to the concept of having gracious speech.
• Psalm 145:8
• Proverbs 15:26
• Proverbs 16:21
• Proverbs 16:24
• Ecclesiastes 10:12
• Colossians 4:6
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X marks the spot! Based on what you just read in Scripture, how are
you doing in the “gracious speech” quest? Place an X on the contin-
uum below closest to where you would say your overall speech toward
others generally falls:
Now, are there any adjustments you need to make to your language to
enable your words to be more grace-laced? If so, what are they?
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Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs. Wis-
dom is found on the lips of the discerning.
Proverbs 10:12 – 13a
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