page https://www.facebook.com/groups/33454533690 55623 Ziphozethu by Jaylin Chapter 1 I got up from the mattress on the floor where I slept every night and folded my blanket. I thanked God it was Friday as I put on my tight school uniform. The plain green skirt barely covered my ass and all of my shirts weren't even my shirts. I got them from other people. I lived in a township in Cape Town. My house was a small shack made of any old pieces of metal and wood my brother and I could find. I made the last of our porridge on the two-plate stove and then woke my brother. "Sicelo, wake up. You're going to be late for school." My ten-year-old brother groaned but got up and got ready anyway. While he ate, I went behind the curtain where he slept and went to look in my drawer for my lace underwear. I put on the lace panties and left the bra. I never liked bras but I also like the attention that I got when I didn't wear one. My boobs were huge and obviously way too big for these shirts. You could see every little spot on my boob if I had any besides my nipple. My boobs are flawless if I do say so myself. I pulled the extremely short skirt a bit higher so everyone could see my ass and then did a few spins and twerks in the mirror. I washed the two-aluminium bowls while my brother got dressed for school. "Sicelo! We need to leave!" I just heard him groan but he came out from behind the curtain with his government issued schoolbag. I walked him halfway and then walked back in the direction of my fucked-up school. "Zethu! Over here! Girl you will not believe what just happened." My friend Lungi yelled excitedly. Well, she wasn't really my friend. She just knew where to pick up rich men and most of the time she didn't want to go alone. Before I could even get anything in she continued speaking. "Your ex, Sipho was kissing some chick. His girlfriend obviously sees him and then she snaps. She thought she had the girl because the girl was skinny. Turns out the skinny girl knew how to fight. End of story she got beat to a pulp by a skinny chick." She lived for this immature drama beef bullshit. All I wanted was to find myself a rich man and get him to pay for everything in my life. We called them blessers. The last time I had a blesser was a few months back. He was old and died and I was left with nothing. I had to sell all the stuff he got me so my brother and I could survive. I couldn't even get close to what those items were valued at here in the township and the money didn't even last two months. We were living off social grant and I even acquire that illegally. I combed out my afro, took my mother's old ID and impersonated her. The bell rang and we started walking into the school. "Good morning, Ziphozethu." A guy said nervously. He looked like your typical nerd. Glasses and everything. He even had the school blazer and nobody could afford the school blazer. "Hi." I said awkwardly and he scurried away. "Who was that?" I asked Lungi and she scoffed. "Our school's only rich kid. If you want a rich boyfriend, you better start keeping up with the rich people. Do you know that huge church that everyone is starting to move to. Our pastor was talking about it the other night. Anyway, Samke's dad is the pastor and he's loaded." Okay. This is the first I hear of it. I should start listening in church. I needed to get to know that guy. We went to the school hall and stood in line for the exams. I was busy writing my finals. I only had one more exam left. My marks were never bad and I bet if I tried they would be really good but I just have too many things to take care of. I was walking home when I heard my name being called. "Zethu! Wait!" I looked back and saw Sipho chasing after me. I just started walking faster. "Zethu! It's no use running! I know where you live!" I just sighed and stopped. "What do you want?" I asked when he caught up with me. "Let's go to your house. Come on." He dragged me all the way home and locked the door behind us. "Is your brother going to be home anytime soon?" I just rolled my eyes because I knew what he wanted "No, he has a rugby game." I said and he started to unbutton my shirt. I let him because I knew he would give me something afterwards and also, I haven't had sex in forever. My ample breasts were exposed as he pulled the shirt off me. He pushed me down on my makeshift bed and he started getting naked. The asshole already had a condom on. I took my skirt completely off and was left in my lace underwear. "Mm. Ah!" I moaned as he forced himself into me. "Fuck! You're so tight!" He moaned as he started thrusting in me. I couldn't stop moaning. It felt so good. I started thrusting my hips against his with every stroke. My body started shaking and I moaned loudly as I had an orgasm. He wasn't far behind. His thrusts got sloppy and he growled into my neck as he came. His phone started ringing and he stood up to answer it. I took off my panties and went to find a dress to put on. "Baby I'll be there now. Just wait. Something came up after school that I needed to take care off." He said into the phone while removing his condom and throwing it out the window. When he hung up he groaned and got dressed. "I have to go baby. Here, take this. Spoil yourself." He placed a few notes in my hand and then left. I looked at myself in the broken mirror and I liked what I saw. My boobs were spilling out of the small dress that didn't even cover my ass. "Zethu, open up!" I rolled my eyes. Lungi was banging at my door. "Girl, I met a man. A rich man and he asked me to join him for drinks tonight. He told me to bring a friend for his friend." She said coming in dragging a suitcase behind her. "You're definitely wearing this dress. Boil some water girl. Let's get ready." We washed and I put the little dress back on. This time with only a red lace thong under it. Lungi borrowed me a pair of heals and a long wig that she glued onto my head. We did each other's make-up and I put on a robe and made arrangements with the lady next door to look after my brother. "Let's go girl. They said to meet them at the main road." I locked our little shack and put the key in one of our hiding spots. It was windy outside and the wind was cold. I was sure my nipples could be spotted from a mile away in this figure hugging dress that wasn't even a dress. It was lingerie. A car was waiting for us at the main road. Both of us got in the back. "Hi, baby." one of the two fat old men said to Lungi and they kissed passionately. "Who's your friend?" the one in the driver's seat while was also checking me out asked. I just acted all shy. "This is my friend Zethu." As we drove to wherever we were driving the guy called Dumisani kept checking me out in the mirror and I made googly eyes back like I was really interested in him but too shy to initiate anything myself. We stopped in front of a hotel and we followed the men inside. They had a suite and waiting for us inside of it was all kinds of food and expensive alcohol. Lungi was all over her guy while I was still playing shy. "You're so beautiful." He complimented me touching my inner thigh and I giggled and thanked him. He pinched my protruding nipple and I moaned softly. "You getting cold?" I nodded and he pulled me close to him. Loud moaning came from the bed in the hotel room. Lungi's guy was between her legs eating her out. I acted all shy and hid my face in his chest. I could see the bulge in his pants. Lungi gave out one last moan and then the both of them sat up on the bed. "How about we go spend some time in the jacuzzi?" Lungi's guy asked and the both of them left out the sliding door to the balcony. I saw them getting naked and then getting in the hot tub. "How about we join them?" Dumisani asked me and I hesitated. "I don't have anything to swim in." He just chuckled and started pulling my dress over my head until I was left in my lace thong and heals only. "There we go baby. Problem solved." he said grabbing onto one of my breasts and massaging it. He stood up and stripped down to his boxers too. I could see the bulge in his pants. It wasn't big but I could work with it. I took my shoes off and stood up from the couch. I took his hand and walked to the jacuzzi. He spanked my ass as I walked. We got in and he wouldn't stop touching my ass and playing with my tits and I let him. Every now and then we would share long passionate kisses. Lungi and her man went inside the room to fuck and we had the whole jacuzzi to ourselves. He started doing something under the water and before I knew it he threw his boxers out of the water and took a seat on the step. The tip of his dick was pointing out of the water. "How about it?" he asked and I acted scared. I've learned over the years that the ultimate ego booster for a male is when they think their dick intimidates you. "Um, my hair will get wet." I said and he smiled. "Don't worry baby. I'll buy you new hair tomorrow on our shopping spree." I smiled and took a deep breath before going under the water and sucking his dick. After that we played with each other and spoke the whole time. Nothing too serious. When the sounds from inside died down we also went back inside. We dried each other off and joined the other two on the bed sleeping. "She makes me so fucking hard. She's so innocent and she looks so fucking young. You know it's always been a fantasy of mine to be with someone who's as young and innocent as she is." I heard Dumisani say and I smiled with my eyes closed. I started moving around in bed acting like I was waking up. I sat up in bed and rubbed my eyes. "Good Morning beautiful." Dumisani came over to me and kissed me while grabbing onto one of my boobs. "Let's go take a shower baby. Breakfast will be here at any minute now." He took my hand and led me to the shower. It was big enough for five people and it was so beautiful. The glass was spotless and knobs were so shiny. He got naked and we got in the shower. He turned a few knobs and water sprayed at us from all different directions. We washed each other. Nothing sexual really happened besides him touching me now and again. It was really turning me on but I let him be in control of whatever he was trying to achieve with me. We dried off and went to join the others. He put on his boxers and I put on his vest and we joined the others at the breakfast table. We had our breakfast and got dressed for a day of shopping. I was so excited but I had to call my neighbor who was looking after my brother and come up with a lie for me being away. I told her I got a cleaning job at some place because one of their staff members didn't show up. We went to the hotel gift shop first and I got denim cutoffs and a oversized tank top. It had big holes for the arms that exposed most of my breasts. Dumisani loved it. We went to a hairdresser and I got a new wig and he bought me an extra one. After that I got clothes clothes and more clothes. "You mentioned something about your brother. Why don't you get him a few things?" he said holding me tightly against him. "Really?" he nodded and I grabbed his face and kissed him. I got my brother some clothes and then we went to eat. I was all over him and he loved it. "Dumi." I called him by his nick name. Let's go somewhere private." I could see him thinking of all the possibilities of that sentence. He paid for our meal and then we went to his car. "Where do you want to go?" he asked when we got to the car. "I don't know. Your house?" I said rubbing his leg. "That might be a problem. My wife is at home." I could see he was looking for a reaction so I didn't give him one. "Maybe we can go to your house?" He asked and I sat back in my seat. I didn't know how to answer him. My sight got blurry with tears. "Baby, what's wrong?" I started playing with my fingers. "Nothing." He lifted me onto his lap. "Tell me." he said wiping my stray tear. "I don't want you to see my house." I said and he sighed. "Why, Baby?" I wiped my tears. "I'm embarrassed about it." He rubbed my back as I cried silently. "I don't think you should be embarrassed about it. If it's what you have it's what you have. Some people have more. Others have less but it's nothing to be embarrassed about." We drove back to where I live and he parked his car at one of the local businesses. We gathered all the bags walked the rest of the to my little shack and I got the key from the hiding place and unlocked my shack. I was a bit nervous when I let him in. "I told the lady looking after my brother that I would be gone the whole day." I said taking a seat on my mattress. "You know - I'm getting a bit cold. Why don't we get under the blankets." he said and joined me in bed. We got under the blankets and started kissing. I unbuttoned his shirt and he took it off completely. I grabbed the bulge in his pants as we kissed and started to unbutton it. The poor guy was already sweating. He pulled his pants off together with his boxers. I started kissing down his chest and when I reached his big stomach I dissappeared under the covers. I held his stomach up and took his dick in my mouth. I sucked violently and the poor guy was going absolutely mad. I could feel myself getting wet and started unbuttoning my shorts. His cum exploded in my mouth and I got out from under the covers and played with it in my mouth. I pulled my top off and let his cum drip out of my mouth and onto my tits. The poor guy looked like he was going to explode. "Fuck! I need you baby!" I got completely naked and he pulled me down on my back and got in between my legs. He was about to thrust into me when I stopped him. "Wait! Condom." He groaned loudly. "I don't have any on me. Aren't you on the pill?" he asked hopefully. "I am but I didn't take it today." he fell back on the bed and groaned. "Shit! When can I see you again, baby?" He asked sighing. "Whenever you want to." I said kissing him. "Fuck! Let me take a few pictures of you. You look so fucking hot with my cum all over you." I posed for a few pictures and then I cleaned myself off and he got dressed and left. 2 I went to fetch my brother and he was super excited to see me. "Zethu, I have good news to tell you." He could almost jump out of his skin. "What is it boy-boy?" He made me take a seat. "People from this other rich school came to watch me play rugby. They want me to be in their school. They said I can come to their school for free I just have to get you to agree. Please, Zethu. Will you come to school and meet them on Monday? Please, please please." I was too shocked to answer. "What? You're going to go to a proper school?! Boy-boy! Come here!" I grabbed him and hugged him tightly. This is all I ever wanted. That's why I made sure his marks were good and he was involved in sport. I sold my virginity for his rugby kit and extra lessons and I don't regret it one bit. I was so proud of him. "Of corse I'll go to your school, boy-boy. I'm so proud of you!" I hugged him tighter. "Zethu? Why are you crying? Are you sad?" I wiped my tears. "No boy-boy I'm not sad. These are happy tears." We ate and he bathed himself. "Zethu you didn't do the washing." He complained with his towel around his waist. "Stop complaining. I'll do it tomorrow while you go to church. Didn't MaRose tell you? I was working and I got you this." I handed him two bags filled with clothes. "What?! New clothes! Thank you so much! I love you Zethu." He grabbed me and hugged me tightly. "I love you too boy-boy. Now go get ready for bed. There's a pajamas in there." He hugged me again and dissappeared behind his curtain. The next day I sent him to church while I cleaned around the shack and washed our clothes. There was a loud knock on my door while I was scrubbing the concrete floor. "Hi baby. How are you doing?" I got up and went to hug and kiss him. "Better now that you're here." He put the packets he was carrying down on the floor. "I can't stay. I just brought you a few things. I have to go back home today but I'll be back in a few days and then we'll get back to what we started. In one of the packets you'll find two boxes of condoms so we never have the same problem we had yesterday." I giggled and we kissed for a bit and then he had to leave. I looked in the bags and there was all kinds of groceries. There wasn't even enough space in the small fridge and cupboard for all of it and I had to hide some behind my curtain where I slept. I finished cleaning and cooked a meal fit for a king. Once again things were on track in my life. Monday came around and I put on my mom's clothes and acted like I was her for Sicelo's school. We waited in the office for the people to arrive so that the meeting can begin. Eventually three men walked in. The principal of the school and two other white men. They explained everything to me and how it will work. "The only thing though is our school is situated in the Eastern Cape and you are going to be expected to buy his uniform and rugby kit which will add up to seven thousand six hundred rand." My eyes went wide. I couldn't afford that and I didn't know anyone who was willing to pay it for me. My relationship with Dumi was too new for me to ask him to pay that money. "Does that mean I won't be able to go?" Sicelo asked me softly and I could see everyone looking at me expectantly. "No boy-boy. I'll make a plan. You're going to go to this school okay." He just nodded and I could see he didn't believe me. I let him go to school and then went home and all I did was worry. Where the hell was I going to get seven thousand six hundred rand? The only money I had to my name was the two hundred rand I got from Sipho the other day. I changed into more casual clothes and took a few condoms with me. I went to sipho's house and knocked on the window to his room. He opened immediately and helped me in. "I need money Sipho. A lot of it and I'm willing to do anything." He picked me up and threw me on his bed. Stupid me let him fuck me senseless for the whole day before making sure he had the damn money. "So, how much do you need?" he asked as we got dressed. "Seven thousand six hundred." his eyes went wide. "Zethu did you really think I had that much?" I could feel the tears start to build in my eyes. "What do you mean?" My voice was shaky. "Baby, I only have like a thousand three hundred stashed away." A clot rose in my throat. "Fuck!" I said with tears running down my face. I needed that money and I needed it by Friday. "What do you need so much money for? Are you in trouble?" I was so mad at myself. "No. Can I just get what you have right now?" He scratched in his cupboard and counted out the money. "Here you go. One thousand three hundred. Zethu, are you sure you're not in trouble. I don't like seeing you like this." I just nodded and took the money. I wiped my tears and went back home. On the way home my tears just kept coming. My brothers dreams were going to be crushed. I don't know who else I could fuck around here to give me the kind of money Sipho just did. I got home just as Sicelo did. I made dinner and then washed myself. He was very quiet and I knew he knew that I didn't have the money and I didn't have a plan to get it. I threw the tank top from the other day over my naked body and just sat by the table crying silently. I went to bed in the early morning hours. "She's still sleeping. What did you say your name was again?" I heard Sicelo ask someone. "I'm Dumisani, a good friend of hers." There was a long pause. "A friend? Then you can help her. She's been crying the whole night. I think it's because she doesn't have the money for my new school. I have to go now but when she wakes up you can tell her that I said that I don't want to go to school if it's going to make her sad. Goodbye then." Sicelo said and I could hear his footsteps leave the shack. "Baby. Zethu. Baby wake up." I opened my swollen eyes and Dumi was standing over me. He looked concerned and then picked me up and we went to sit on a chair. I was completely naked besides for the tank top and my pussy lay flat on his dick but he was still more concerned about me than his erection. "Your brother tells me you need money." He said and I sighed. "He shouldn't have told you that. I'm fine. We're fine. We don't need anything." He wiped my tears. "Don't lie. He told me all about the school and he really wants to go. How much is it?" I shook my head and started crying for real. "I can't expect you to pay it." I said and he rubbed my back trying to comfort me. "Why not? I want to take care of you. How much is it?" I shook my head again and started crying more loudly. I knew I was killing my brothers dreams but I couldn't let him pay for it. "Baby please. Think of your brother here. He looked so excited talking about the school. I'm rich Okay. I can afford it. Whatever it is it's probably pocket change for me. Come on baby. Don't you want to make your brothers dreams come true?" I nodded crying on his chest. "How much baby?" He asked again rubbing me back. "Seven thousand six hundred rand." I said and started crying again. I was a mess and that wasn't sexy at all. "That wasn't so hard was it. Give me the banking details and I'll deposit it okay. How about I go now and then also get us something to eat. Don't worry baby. Everything is going to be alright." I gave him the banking details and he tucked me into bed so I could sleep. When he left I quickly got up and put the condoms in a small bag so that he didn't notice some of them were missing. I put the female condoms in one bag and the male condoms in another and separated the strips. I threw the boxes away and acted like I was sleeping when he came back. "Wake up baby. You need to eat something." He picked me up again and sat like we sat before eating our food. We would even feed each other sometimes. "Thank you so much. You don't know what it means to me." I kissed him and he grabbed onto my ass. "Baby, I want to take care of you. Anything you need or even want please tell me. Let me take care of you Okay?" I nodded and we kissed again. "You want to take care of me?" I asked in between kisses and he nodded. "Then take care of me." I said getting on the small table behind me and spreading my legs. He started kissing in between my thighs and it made me so wet I could feel my pussy dripping on the table. "Please." I begged thrusting my hips up to his face. "Be patient baby girl. Daddy will take care of you." So he had a daddy kink. Kinky mother fucker. "Daddy please." I moaned out and he groaned. "Ah! Oh fuck!" I moaned as he sucked violent on my clit. My legs were shaking and my moans were getting louder. I had to put a hand over my mouth when I came and squirted hard on his face. "Oh fuck. Daddy's baby girl is a squirter." He lifted me off the table and he laid me down on the bed. He got naked and got in between my legs. "Where are those condoms baby?" I handed him the bag and he put one on. Just as he was about to enter me his phone rang. "Daddy, no." I tried pulling him towards me but he went for the phone. "I have to take it baby girl. It's my wife." I rolled my eyes. I got completely naked and started playing with my boobs. He spoke on the phone and it sounded like an emergency. I didn't care though. I continued to tease him and play with my body. "Baby I'm sorry. She was in an accident. Nothing serious happened but her mother is with her and it will look really bad if I'm not there." He put his arms around my waist placing small kisses on my lips. "I'll make it up to you Okay. But first let me get a picture." I covered my face. "I don't want my face in it." He still tried to move my hands away from my face. "Come on. Behave baby, I'm making a video. I'm the only one who's going to see it." "No, stop." I didn't mean to say it. I didn't want him to take the video but I needed him and I was scared I was chasing him away. "Open up." He hit my thigh and pulled my legs open anyway. "Wait." He shoved two fingers in me. "Shh." I hissed. "Look at that. Completely wet." He said for the camera. The flash finally went off and I felt uneasy. I wasn't sure why but I couldn't afford for that video to get out. A lot was riding on my image around her. I kissed him goodbye and hoped he'd never show it to anyone. After he left Lungi stormed into the house. "Friend was that who I think it is?" I just nodded and she started squealing. "So are you guys a thing?" I just rolled my eyes and sat on one of our broken chairs. "I thinks so. I don't know." she squealed again. "Let me see what he got you." She went through my new clothes and wigs. She was more excited than I was. I changed my tank top to a strapless bra thing that my massive boobs obviously spilled out of and then put on my long wig and did my makeup. "Let's go and drive these mother fuckers crazy." She said and I laughed as we walked out the door. We went out for a walk and tried spotting a few guys with money. We spotted a few guys who were in the biggest gang around here standing with their gangleader. We walked passed them and acted as if we didn't hear them when they called us. A guy came up behind me and took my arm. "The boss wants to see you and Junior boss wants to see you." he said to me and then to Lungi. I rolled my eyes and he walked us back to the gang. Lungi was swept off somewhere by a thin guy who had his pants almost all the way down and had on a peak cap. She was already laughing and giggling. "Wow. Look at you." he said making me take a twirl. "Mm! Look at this body! Come with me baby." He took my hand in his and lead me into the restaurant he owned. We walked through the restaurant and went out a back door. There was another building there and we entered it. It looked like a big office. He took a seat behind the huge desk and pulled me down on his lap. "Let me feel you baby." He said and I scoffed. "What are you going to do for me first. I don't come cheap." The room roared with his laughter. "Of course not. Let me get you something." He got up and I sat on the desk. He went to a painting on the wall. He took it off and put in a code in the hidden safe. He took something out and then closed and hid the safe. He placed two stacks of money on the desk and then took his dick out and started rubbing it. "Four thousand rand. Now turn around and give me what I want." He moved me roughly. 3 My exams were over and December holidays were halfway through. The parties were the bomb and money just kept on rolling in for me. Dumisani even had me open a bank account and he bought me a phone so he can keep in contact with me. He spent a week a month with me and then he went back to his wives in the Eastern Cape. Yes, I said wives. He had two wives and two children. All of them girls. He bought a bed for the shack which we share when he stays over. On the other hand, Xolisa, my gangster lover, was also spoiling me rotten. He would shower me with gifts and money but he kept everything low profile because he didn't want his wife to find out. Yep, the gang leader had a wife. It was Sunday and I had to put on my church girl act again. Living this double life was the kinkiest thing and it turned me on so much. I put on my floor length short-sleeved floral dress with a pair of sandals. I wrapped a scarf around my neck and my brother and I made our way to the new church we started going to. When we reached the church I left my brother in Sunday school and went to go and take a seat somewhere in the middle. I started singing the hymns with he congregation. "Ziphozethu it's good to see you again. I'm not sure if you remember. I'm Samke from high school. My father is the pastor." I remembered him all too well. If I could get my claws hooked onto him I would probably be set for life. "I remember you." I said softly. "Do you mind if I join you." I smiled shyly making sure not to make eye contact. "Of course." we sat together throughout the whole service. After church we stood outside in an awkward silence. "Zethu!" My brother came running to me. "Yes boy-boy?" I asked hugging him. "Can I go to Phiwe's house please? His mom invited me to lunch and then to the beach." He was super excited about it. "Let's first go home so you can get changed and pack things for the beach okay." he nodded and went to go and tell his friend. "Samke, who's your friend. Oh she's beautiful." The pastors wife came to join us. "Ma, this is Ziphozethu. Ziphozethu, this is my mother Lillian." "Molo MamFundisi." I greeted and she greeted back. "You should join us for lunch. Here are the car keys my boy. Bring her with you okay." I just stood there like a shy little girl. "Come, let me take you and your brother home." He knew exactly where I lived. He waited outside as I packed a few things for my brother for the beach. When we were done we dropped my brother at his friend's house and then we drove to one of the biggest houses in the neighborhood. It was a two story house that had a huge yard. The gate opened and we drove in. The house on the inside was huge and it had a lot of church things in it. Every room had a bible open on a table as well as a cross. Some of them even had pictures of Jesus. We went to the dining room and started eating after a very long prayer. "So Zethu what are you doing with your life now that you are no longer in school?" I cleared my throat. "I do odd jobs to provide for my brother and I." she just nodded. We finished lunch and Samke took me outside. We spoke about stupid things like our favorite colour and food. Before we knew it it was late. "I need to get going. My brother is probably back already." He looked a bit disappointed but he offered to take me home. He dropped me off and walked me to my door and everything. "I enjoyed spending time with you today." He said coming closer to me. "I enjoyed spending time with you too." He came closer again and our lips touched. I let him take the lead and kiss me. When he let go of me eventually he was completely out of breath. He said goodbye and left . "So you're into church boys now." I rolled my eyes at Dumisani. "I might fuck the shit out of you but I still have a reputation to uphold around here and church boy will really boost that image." He said scoffed and pushed me into the shack. "You? Fuck the shit out of me?" He said and pushed me on the bed ripping my clothes off. "I'll show you who fucks who in this relationship." Just before we could do anything my little brother stormed in the shack. Luckily we were behind a curtain so we could get ourselves decent first. "What did I say about running in the house?" The little boy apologized and then got back to telling us how fun the beach was while I started dinner. When I was done my brother was still talking to Dumisani about his adventures this holiday. Dumisani looked like he was enjoying it as much as my brother was. When my brother, Sicelo finally went to sleep I took a seat on Dumisani's lap. "I missed you." I said starting to kiss him. "I missed you too but after the stunt you pulled I should lay you over my lap and spank you. Nobody fucks me. I fuck them." I got up off his lap. "So your seeing other people now?" I just rolled my eye at him. "The only reason I'm with that fucking annoying church boy is to keep up appearances. I sit here in this damn shack for weeks waiting for you just to find out you're seeing other people?" He pulled me in his lap. "Baby I'm going to need you to calm down. It's not like that. You are the only woman besides my wives that I sleep with. I literally have sex with my wives once a month. Those old fat women don't even get me hard anymore. I have to think of you just to get through a night with them. Baby, please believe me. Please baby." I just nodded and laid down on his chest. "Baby I have some bad news though." I sighed and got off his lap and sat on the chair opposite from him. "What is it now?" I asked folding my arms. "I'm getting married to my third wife." 4 "What?" I stood up from the chair and started crying loudly clasping my hand over my mouth. "Baby, it's not what you think it is. I was supposed to marry this woman forty years ago but she refused and married someone else. It was arranged even before our birth. I feel nothing for her. She's just as fat, old and ugly as my first two wives." "Are you going to have sex with her?" I asked and he was dead silent. I started sobbing again. "I have to baby. What will she think if I don't have sex with her? She'll tell our elders and I would be embarrassed in front of everyone." I collapsed onto the bed and cried. "I'm sorry baby. I'll make it up to you. I swear I will and that's why I have a getaway planned for us." I forced myself not to respond at all but I was super excited. The next day I went to a spa and got a full body massage. I got my entire body waxed and then went to a salon. I got my nails done and put in the longest weave they had. After that I went shopping. I bought the most revealing clothes I could and the weirdest lingerie I could find. It had no crotch area. I packed a bag and made sure my brother was safe at his friend's house. "You ready to go baby?" I nodded and we went to his car and drove to the beach house. It wasn't what I expected. I thought it was going to be like a mansion on the beach but it was just a two bedroom cozy house. Don't get me wrong, I actually really liked it. We could see the ocean from our bedroom through the clear glass sliding door. Outside our bedroom was a deck with wooden furniture. I absolutely loved it. I packed my clothes away and then Dumisani suggested we go to the beach. I put on a orange bikini. My boobs obviously were way too big for it and the bikini bottom was a thong. I made sure all my bikinis were. He needed to remember what he has with this new wife in the picture. I tied my long weave in a bun and we walked hand in hand to the beach. He mostly watched me in the water as I splashed around and enjoyed myself making sure to give him the best view of my body. I left the water and went up to him. My body was dripping everywhere. I took a seat on his lap feeling his hard dick press against me. "Do you still love me?" I asked taking his dick out of his shorts. "Yes of course baby." I lifted myself on him and took him inside of me. "Then prove it." When I said that he started trusting like a wild animal. I couldn't stop myself from thrusting back. I was a moaning mess by the time he was ready to cum. I got off him and sucked him until he came in my mouth. "Lets get back and start dinner." I said and got up. I swayed my hips as I walked back to the house. I took a shower and put on a set of red lace lingerie. I put on a white top over it and went to start dinner. I felt someone wrap their arms around me. "Dinner is almost ready." I said turning around and kissing him. "I wish we could stay like this forever." He said holding onto me tighter. "Me too." Most of that night was spent 'making love'. "Baby wake up. I made breakfast. Well it's lunch time but whatever. Come on." I woke up and went to freshen up. I put my lingerie on and threw a robe over without tying it before I joined him on the deck where we had breakfast. We spent the day inside the house. Just laying around and fucking on anything and everything. "Baby wake up. I'm hungry." I just groaned. I felt the bed shift and then I felt his tongue on my pussy. "Ahh! Mm! Yes daddy!" Fuck he was good with his tongue. "Right there daddy!" I came all over his face and waisted no time in turning us around. I got on top of him and took his dick in me. "Fuck, your pussy always stays so fucking tight!" He roared out and he came hard. "What the hell is going on in here?!" I heard a woman's voice yell. Dumisani was too busy coming to even hear the voice. I turned around and saw two overweight females glaring at me. "Who the fuck are you?" I asked and Dumisani jumped up. "Baby what are you guys doing here?" Baby? Oh shit! Were they his wives? "That's all you have to say?" All of this was happening while Dumisani was still buried deep in me and his dick was nowhere near soft. "Get off him you whore!" The women came up to me and pulled me off him and threw me to the floor. "Baby are you going to allow them to treat me like this!" They grabbed my bags and started packing my stuff. "Baby! Dumisani!" "Baby I'm sorry. I'm sorry." he said starting to cry as his wives dragged my naked body out of the house. I fought every second of it. I was not going down without a fight. There was a car outside and I saw the one throw all my stuff in the backseat. I fought as they forced me into the car. "Dumisani!" I tried for the last time as they got me into the car. "Shut up bitch!" The car door slammed closed and it locked before I even tried to get out. It was then when I noticed I was crying like a little baby. What was I going to do now? How was I going to provide for my brother? I was naked in the car and I had to explain to the male driver where I lived. I found something between my luggage and got dressed before I got home. I decided to sleep all day because if I didn't I would probably overthink everything. The next day was Sunday and church went on forever. When it was finally over I was attacked by Samke and his mother who forced me to go to lunch with them. We drove with Samke and Sicelo was having the time of his life. Samke gave Sicelo a tour of the house while I helped set the table in silence. "Did my son do anything wrong?" Lilian, Samke's mother asked. "No, mamFundisi." She just sighed. "I would've swarn you two were totally in love with each other the last time you were here." I was playing these people so hard. My gameplan was already worked out in my head. We had lunch and I just sat there awkwardly eating my food the whole time. One by one they started dissappearing until it was only Samke and I left at the huge table. "Zethu did I do something to upset you?" He asked when we were alone. "No, you didn't do anything." He just sighed. "You just dissappeared. You stole my first kiss and then you dissappeared." His eyes went wide. "I'm so sorry. I forgot to even mention it to you. I had to go to Johannesburg for a while and sort a few things out but I'm back now. Did you just say I was you first kiss?" I just nodded. The day went on and I acted less and less hostile against him. The next few days of the holiday was spent with him. We even spent new years together I was kind of happy even though I was playing the guy. The happiness ended very quickly because my brother had to leave for his new school. I cried for three whole days after he left. I realize that this is what I wanted and it would secure my brothers future so I sucked it up and carried on with my plan. I got everything I needed and made my way to Samke's house. We were in his room kissing on the bed when I stopped him. "Why don't you go and get us something to drink." he jumped up and went to the kitchen. I went to the ensuit bathroom and stripped out of my church girl dress. I got everything ready for when it happened. "Zethu, where are you?" I stepped out of the bathroom in my lingerie. He stood there staring at me like a retard. I took the glasses of juice out of his hand and started kissing him. His brain finally started working again and he took over. I took his clothes off and made me get under the covers. I almost laughed at the size of his dick. It was just a small thick thing pointing at me. "Take your panties off." I did as he said and he joined me under the covers. He started kissing me and then he got in between my legs. When I felt him put his dick inside me I started to act like it was the most painful I ever felt. I squeezed my walls against his tip. "Oh that's tight. Relax baby." He said going deeper and I screamed into his neck. I surprised myself with tears. "Stop! Take it out!" He pulled out as fast as he could and I ran to the bathroom and locked the door. I got the fake blood and put it on my pussy. I even risked it all and put some inside of me. It did say non toxic. "Baby, are you okay in there? Did I hurt you?" I hid all the stuff I used and opened the door. I looked at my bloody hand and then at him. "I'm bleeding." He came over to me and hugged me. "Were you a virgin?" He asked and I nodded. "That's normal baby. It explains why it hurt so much. Come let me make you feel good. Come baby." He led me back to the bed and laid a towel down that I got on. He entered me again and after a few thrusts I started 'moaning'. We weren't even fucking for full minute when he pulled out and came on my stomach. 5 I started living with them in their house and it was almost like we were husband and wife. We had separate rooms but he always came to my room at night to satisfy himself. I was so sexually frustrated I couldn't take it anymore. I put a silk robe over my naked body and went to get something to drink and then went to the TV room. I took my robe off and started touching myself. I moved to my pussy and inserted a finger. It felt like I went on forever but I just couldnt cum. I just laid there more frustrated than when I started. I felt a presence above me but I didnt open my eyes. I felt a thick finger on my clit and I knew for a fact that it wasn't my boyfriend's finger. My body twitched as the finger circled my clit. The finger moved down and slipped into my hole and I heard a groan as I moaned. "Ah. Yes. Faster baby." I moaned softly. I knew for a fact that this was not Samke's finger and the only other two people in the house were his parents. It was way too thick to be his mother's so it had to be the pastor's. The thought of that made me squirt right there and then. When I came down from my high I decided to try something. "Oh Samke. That was so good." I moaned squeezing my boobs. I opened my eyes and came face to face with the pastor licking his finger. I jumped up trying to cover myself. He came over to me and grabbed me before I could get away. "Don't be scared Zethu. Don't be scared. I made you feel good didn't I." He held me tightly. As I tried escaping from him. I felt his hand on my ass and then he entered me from behind. He fingered me roughly and I wasn't fighting him anymore. My legs started shaking and I held onto his shoulders. "It's good right. Am I making you feel good Zethu?" I nodded. "Yes." I moaned breathlessly. "Better than my no good son?" I wrapped my arms around his neck and moaned into his neck as I came again. "Yes pastor!" After that I was so weak that he had to carry me to the bathroom. He sat me down on the toilet and got a cloth and wet it. He wiped the cum off my legs and then went onto my pussy. "Oh! Ah!" I moaned as he wiped. "You're so tight and sensitive that I don't understand why my son can't pleasure you." He said softly to himself but I heard. I went to bed and I couldn't stop thinking about what happened. I needed more. I woke up the next morning and acted like absolutely nothing happened. I had breakfast like normal making sure to avoid the pastor at all cost. After Samke left I locked myself in my room. I stayed there for a while until I heard someone messing with the lock. I knew exactly who it was so I got naked and laid on the bed acting like I was asleep. The door finally went open and I heard a groan. My bed shifted and I felt someone climb on top of me. The person started kissing my neck and fondling my boobs. I moaned as I started getting wet. He started kissing me and I kissed back. I opened my eyes and started screaming. The pastor put his hand over my mouth. "Don't fight it baby. Don't fight it. You know you want this." He took his hand off my mouth and we started kiss again. I grabbed his hands from my boobs and broke the kiss. "Wait. I'm your son's girlfriend and you're married. This is wrong." He grabbed my tits and thrust the bulge in his pants against my pussy. "This doesn't need to be anything emotional. We can just have sex. You're not being satisfied and neither am I. So all we're doing is helping each other out. There's nothing wrong with that. In fact this is the right thing to do." 1 We continued kissing and I loosened his pants a pulled it down. I rubbed the bulge in his pants and he groaned. He pulled his pants down and my eyes went wide at the site of his huge juicy dick. I could clearly see the veins in it as it stood up straight. "Foreplay can wait. I need to be inside of you." I moaned as he rubbed himself between my wet folds. I moaned as he forced himself in me. "Oh, that's big." I moaned when u felt him. He started thrusting like a mad man but he too finished quickly. At least I felt something. "Let's do it again." I demanded and went on my hands and knees. I needed to be fucked and I needed to be fucked right. "Oh, yes! Harder!" I moaned as he started thrusting in me. "Faster!" He tried but he could so I just pushed him down on the bed and got on top of him. I needed to cum. I took him in me and started thrusting like a mad woman. Just when I was close this guy came and started going soft. "No, no, no, no!" I got off him and took him in my mouth I needed him to get hard again. "Zethu?" I turned around and saw my boyfriend looking straight at me while his dad's penis was still buried deep in my throat. 6 I ran after Samke and followed him to my room. "Samke! Please! Listen to me! It was a mistake. I swear I didn't mean for it to happen! I'm sorry baby. Please!" I pleaded with him while he was throwing all of my clothes out of my cupboard. "Baby please." I begged again and grabbed his hand and put it on my boob. "Please baby. Don't I make you feel good? Don't I make you feel like a man?" I said trying to kiss him. He pushed me off him and slapped me so hard tears started falling from my eyes. "Don't you dare touch me again you whore! Did you really think I would want to fuck you after I saw you naked in top of my father!? You were supposed to be pure! Mine alone! You disgust me! You better get your shit and get out! If you're still here in thirty minutes I will beat you so hard that you will be unrecognizable and ugly to the rest of the world! Get your shit and get out!" He slapped me one more time and pushed me away as he left. I didn't wait. I immediately started packing my stuff. It wasn't much so I was done quickly and I made my way to my old shack. Luckily nobody took it for themselves yet. I unlocked it and when I was inside I locked it from the inside. I couldn't believe what just happened. How could I be so stupid? I ruined my whole future and for what? An orgasm that I never reached? How was I going to survive? How was my brother going to survive boarding school without the allowance Samke used to give me that I sent to him? I couldn't stop thinking so I just went to bed and slept for days. By the fourth day I was starving and I had nothing. It felt like my stomach was eating itself. Back when we first got to the city I could go up to two weeks but now water just wasn't enough. I wasn't used to it anymore. I bathed myself and put on a dress. I walked around the neighborhood and saw the lady who always looked after Sicelo was about to start her washing. "Sawubona MaMlambo." I greeted. "Yebo, Sawubona." She greeted back. "I see you're doing washing." She looked at me suspiciously and just hummed in response. "Why don't you let me do it for you?" I suggested and she scoffed. "Why would I pay someone to do something I'm so used to doing myself?" She asked rudely and I almost cried. I haven't felt this small in a while. "No, Ma. I don't want your money." I squeaked out. This was so humiliating. "So then what do you want little girl. Just last week you were sitting on the stage with the pastors family living the highlife. Now all of a sudden you're back here wanting to do my laundry. What is it that you want? Speak up!" The tears started falling from my eyes as she spoke and I tried wiping them away. "I just want something to eat, Ma. Just this once. I won't bother you again I swear. I'll make a plan. Just this once let me do your washing. I just need something to eat." I cried like a baby. I heard a sigh and then felt warm arms wrap around me. It made me cry harder. "Shh, baby. It's okay. I can help you. Don't cry my girl. Don't cry. You're too beautiful and too strong to be crying. Let's go inside." She led me inside and dished some porridge for me. "Now, you promised you'd do my laundry right?" I nodded and she placed the bowl in front of me and I thanked her. "Okay, eat up. Once you're done you can start washing outside. The water is already ready for you. Once you've hung it up in the sun I'll give you lunch. When it's dry and you fold it I'll make sure you get a nice plate of food for dinner." I thanked her and ate my porridge before I got to work. It was only her so she didn't have much clothes. I was done before lunch time so I decided to clear up around her yard and sweep her house. She was drinking tea and laughing at whatever was playing on her tv. As promised she gave me lunch. We were eating together when she gave me a flyer. "Now Zethu, I don't like what's going on at this place. They make the girls wear the most disgusting uniform but it is a job. And you need one. You told me about your brother's school and how he needed an allowance. You both need this. It's a restaurant and they are looking for waiters but they are looking for a certain type of girl. A girl who has things to show off." She said and looked over my body. I looked at the flyer and I had to control my expression. I knew the place. I used to sleep with the owner. He was my gangster boyfriend Xolisa. "If you go now you can still make it. I'll take the laundry off when it's dry. You go and get the job." I nodded and ran to the restaurant. When I got there I had to stand in a long line and I was last in the line. Eventually a man did come and kick some of the girls out of the line. When he got to me he made me spin around. He grabbed into my ass and I let him. "Now you... We can definitely work with." He sent me inside and when I got to Xolisa's office he choked on his drink. "Oh, so you're still alive?" He asked sarcastically. "Are you finally done fucking church boys because there's no room for your reputation in this job?" I nodded and he laughed. "Well then there's just one more step before you are hired." I rolled my eyes. "And what's that?" I asked knowing exactly what it was. "Don't play dumb. Come ride this dick." 7 When we were done I used his bathroom to freshen up and then ran back to the area I live. "So, did you get the job." I nodded and made sure not to show my excitement. "That's good. Come get your dinner." I walked in her little shack. It was way nicer than mine. I folded the dry clothes and she gave me my food to take home. I ate half of my plate and started getting ready for the next day. I washed one of my old curly wigs and let it air-dry overnight. Once I finished putting my hair in cornrows and bathing myself I went to bed. The next morning I got dressed and put on my wig. I ate some of my leftovers and went to work. I got there and met the other new girl. "Hi, I'm Sethu. I'm new in town." She said and we shook hands. "Zethu." I said smiling. I was very awkward when talking and starting friendships with other women. They never like me. We got dressed in our uniform. I didn't even know if you could call it that. It consisted of a thong and a very tight shorts. Infact it wasn't even shorts. It was just booty shorts with the restaurant's name on the butt and it was compulsory that our bright pink thongs is visible. We also had a bright pink bra and a sheer crop top. The first week was tough. I had to get used to the groping and touching. Sometimes the floor bodyguard had to get involved especially when the men got way too drunk. After a while I got used to it and I learned how to deal with the trouble makers. The first month in my job I ate from the garbage bin outside the kitchen. I had no money for food and people would throw away whole plates of meat. Every night after we locked up I would go out there and scavenge for the best left overs I could find. Sometimes I got really lucky and other times I took what I could find. I found a half a rack of ribs and put it in my lunch box before I walked home. It was only one more day until pay day and then I could stop doing this shit. There is nothing more humiliating than having to pull food out of a garbage can but I had to survive. When I got home I cooked the ribs a little bit just for my own sanity. I was hoping to burn the germs off somehow. I sat in bed and ate. I couldn't even sleep. I kept on checking my phone for my money to be in but it never came. The next morning I was livid as I walked to work. I needed that money. My brother needed his allowance and I needed to eat food that didn't come out of the trash. When I walked in everyone was standing around and Xolisa was giving them envelopes. I was so relieved. I needed that money. He gave me mine and he looked angry. "In my office." He said sternly. I was nervous. To my knowledge I didn't do anything wrong but who knows. A customer or a staff member could've complained. I walked in his office and made me sit in his chair. He pressed play and I saw myself on the screen going through the garbage. I paused it as soon as I realized what it was. "Um, I lost something. I was just looking for it." I lied quickly. I could see he didn't believe a word that I said. "Every night Zethu? You lost something every single night and it just happened to be food? Come on Zethu. You could've just asked." I looked down at my lap in shame. "I know. I'm just really tired. I'm exhausted and I didn't feel like..." I just sighed and out my face in my hands. "Really Zethu? Really? How many times have we hung out together during your break and I expected nothing of you. I complain about my wife, I complain about my business and you just sit there and listen. I expected nothing of you. I thought we were becoming friends. Even as your boss you could've asked me for an advance rather than digging through the trash just to have something to eat." I started crying silently. "Come on, Zethu. Don't cry. I didn't mean to be so harsh." I wasn't even really crying because of what he said I was just exhausted. All I wanted to do was rest for once in my life without any worries. "Okay, let's make a deal. You and I are now friends and we share our problems. Not just me blabbing the whole time okay. We'll only have sex when you really want to and no more digging in the trash. If you need food you tell me." I nodded and he hugged me. I carried on working there. My brother was really excited when he got his allowance and hearing him happy just made me happy too. Xolisa and I started becoming friends and I told him all about my crazy life here in the city. Not much of the really depressing stuff just recent events. "Do you know what I really want?" I said one day on my lunch break. I was talking to Xolisa and Sethu. "What's that?" Sethu asked and took a bite of her burger. "A rich husband. I've been with rich guys. I know how to get a rich guy but I can never seem to keep a rich guy." I complained eating my fries. "Your problem is the type of rich guy and your approach. Your very sexy and you know it. Everyone can see you know it. You choose the wrong rich men also. You choose the ones who only want to fuck and get it over with. The type of rich guy you need is the fat depressed kind." Sethu said and I looked at her like she was weird. "Aren't they all fat and depressed?" Xolisa stole the words right out of my mouth. "Yes, but its a very specific kind. And there's lots of them. I almost got married to one. You need the type of guy who is very insecure. The type that lets everyone walk over him. He probably has a wife but she wears the pants in the marriage. A guy with absolutely no confidence. When you find him you become the most submissive woman on earth. You act like you worship the ground he walks on and you stroke his ego until he feels he's in control. When he finally thinks so you either fall pregnant or bring up marriage. I suggest you fall pregnant and pray to god it's a boy. That's your ticket to the soft life." Sethu explained and I was shocked. "Holy shit thats evil!" Xolisa exclaimed. "I know but it works. I was so close to getting married. He just found out I was faking my pregnancy. Word of advice, don't do that. It's dumb. It never works." We all laughed and before we knew it our break was over and Sethu and I had to get back to work. After a while that became my normal life. I would go to work and try and work as many shifts as possible. I hung out with Sethu a lot and we became close friends. Sethu got promoted to manager when our last one quit and she finally got to get out of that horrible uniform. Both of us were on the 'hunt' as she liked to call it for a husband. It was a slow day when a man dressed in a black clothes and a pastors collar walked in. He went straight up to the counter and spoke directly to Sethu. "Good afternoon beautiful." He said and Sethu looked unimpressed. "Afternoon pastor. What can I get for you today?" She asked politely looking him up and down. "Let me get four lamb chops, some rice, and potato salad." He ordered and then Sethu called me over to seat him. "Oh no. I was hoping to be served by you." He said to her and I understood what was going on so I left. He spent the whole day at the restaurant. He took his time eating his food. He even ordered extra. When he was full he ordered a drink and took forever to sip on it. When he was done he odered another. It was late afternoon and the dinner customers were coming in. He went on to order dinner as well. He even got dessert this time. When he was the last customer left he paid for all his food. "Since you've kept me company today and we've gotten to know each other how about you give me your number and I take you out sometime?" He asked and she smiled shyly. There's been subtle flirting between the two of them the whole day. She sighed and gave in. He gave her his phone and she put her number in it. He even called her to make sure it was her number and he made her save it. He finally left and we were squealing at the top of our lungs. "Zethu, I am not even playing. This time I'm getting pregnant. I don't care if he's not a billionaire I need a husband to take care of me. Imagine being a pastor's wife. That's like being a celebrity around here. Oh, Zethu I'm so excited!" We danced and had a few drinks before we left. 8 "So? How's it going with the pastor?" I asked Sethu on our lunch break. "We've been on five dates and he still hasn't made a move yet. But I'm prepared whenever he does. I'm even drinking these fertility herbs that I got from a traditional healer." She said and I was shocked. "No way. You went to a sangoma?" She just shrugged like it was nothing. "Yes, I need this man to stay. Zethu he's taking over the big church. The one your exes father used to preach at. That job comes with a lot of money and a big house. I am marrying this man even if it means trapping him with a baby." "Wait, what happened to Samke and his family?" I asked and she got all excited. "I can't believe I forgot to tell you! His father was steeling money from the church and he was caught sleeping with underaged girls. The whole family is on the run. I couldn't believe it when I heard it." I was shocked. Not at the sleeping with underaged girls part but at the steeling money part. They all acted as if they were so holy. Months went by and I still didn't meet anyone. Sethu and her pastor were going strong and I still wasn't even dating anyone. Sicelo decided not to come home for the winter break and besides for needing money I needed companionship. "Zethu. Come here." I was working a double shift and there was some drunk annoying guy going on about his wife who wouldn't go home, also I wasn't in the mood to deal with Xolisa. "Roll your eyes all you want but you're gonna thank me later." He showed me his phone and I read the Google search. "Moses Nkunzi Gumede, third richest man in Africa... Okay, Xolisa. Where the hell do you expect me to find him?" I said totally annoyed. He just rolled his eyes. "Right there in the corner you idiot." My eyes went wide as I stared at the sad man in the corner and the picture on the phone. "Wow." I couldn't believe this was happening. "I suggest you take him home with you. There's not a car in sight so somehow he got here and now he has no way if getting back where he belongs. Also, I need to lock up. Now go get your husband and remember what Sethu said. Boost his ego to the max." I nodded and walked up to his table. "Baba, we're about to close up. Is there anyway for me to get you home?" I asked innocently. "Home? Home! I'm never going back home! I'd rather die in a ditch than go home! I'm not going home. Bring me more booze!" He yelled sluring his words. "Baba, we're closing. You can't stay here." He pulled me into his lap. "Then where must I go? I have nowhere to go. My car has been stolen, my wife has been cheating on me with my brother, and my life has fallen apart. Where am I supposed to go? Huh?" He asked and started crying. He planted his face in my chest and cried like a baby. That's when I went in for the kill. "You can come home with me. I'll take care if you." He looked up at me. "Really? You'll help me?" I nodded. When he finally let me go I went to put on my coat and I took forever to lead this drunk man to my shack. When we got there he started undressing himself. I thought he wanted to sleep with me but he just got into bed once he was down to his underwear. I didn't get much sleep because of his snoring but it gave me the opportunity to get up really early. I wrapped a scarf around my head and out on a white long sleeve vest. I opted for no bra just so my nipples could draw his attention even though I was going for a more traditional wife look. I put on a lace thong and wrapped a thin piece of fabric with African print on it around my waist. It was very old so you could kind of see through it. I checked myself out and with my home slippers on I looked like someone's submissive wife. I prepared breakfast for him hoping the smell would wake him. When I turned around to set the table he was standing there in his underwear holding a knife. I immediately put my hands up and started pleading for him to out it down. "Who are you?!" He asked and my breathing started to pick up. "I'm Ziphozethu. I met you last night at the restaurant I work in and you were telling me how you had no place to stay. I said you could stay here for the the night and I brought you home with me. Please put the knife down." I rambled off. "How do I know you're not working for my wife? How do I know you're not a hooker she sent so she can get more out of the divorce?" He came closer to me and I squeezed my eyes shut. "I'm not I swear. I've never met you! I've never met your wife! Please, don't hurt me. I was just trying to be nice. You can leave. The door is open. I folded your clothes and left them at the foot of the bed. Please don't hurt me." I was crying like a little baby. I was literally scared for my life. He put the gun down and I let out a breath of relief. My whole body was shaking. "I'm sorry ma'am. I'm so so sorry." He came closer to me and I flinched. "I'm not gonna hurt you. I promise. I put the knife down. See? No knife. Let me help you." I was still crying and shaking because of shock but I let him lead me to one if my beat up chairs. He got me some water and put some sugar in it. He held the glass as I drank. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you like this. You were only trying to help me. I'm so sorry. I should've known better. It's just that I'm going through so much at the moment and I'm just paranoid. I'm so so sorry." I nodded my head. "I made breakfast. If you want some." I offered and avoided eye contact like a good Zulu girl. Avoiding eye contact was a sign of respect in my culture. "I would love some. Let me go and get decent." While he got dressed I dished his food and prepared a basin with water. He took a seat and I took the small basin and I had a clean dish cloth around my arm. I went on my knees in front of him and lifted the basin to him. "Huh?" He asked confused and I still avoided eye contact. "For your hands, Baba." I said in a gentle voice. He proceeded to wash and dry his hands. I then served him his breakfast. He just looked confused through it all. I sat down to eat as well. We ate silently and he kept raving about the food afterwards. "Zethu, please have a seat. I feel that I really need to explain my situation to you." I took a seat and he cleared his voice. "I recently found out that my wife had been cheating on me with my brother and all my children are his. They thought I had a fertility problem which I have resolved recently. That's why I ended up in your restaurant last night with nowhere to go. Thank you so much for taking me in and feeding me. I'm really sorry for what happened earlier. I was confused by all of this and I haven't even introduced myself. I'm Moses Gumede." He looked at me like he was expecting something from me. I gave him a blank face and a nod. I could see on his face that he couldn't believe I didn't know who he was. "I understand Baba. I'm sorry all of this happened to you. You seem like a very good man. I don't have much but you can stay here as long as you need. It's not safe out there in the streets at night. You already told me your car got stolen. So, if you want to, you can stay here. Only if you want to." "Really?" He asked and I nodded. "Yebo, Baba." He took my hands in his. "Thank you. Thank you so much. I would love to." I cleaned that day and while I cleaned we spoke about random things and made jokes. I could sense the he really was a nice guy but nobody has ever done anything nice for him. He called his friend to bring him some clothes and they spoke quietly for a little bit until he left. I made us both sandwiches for lunch and once again made sure to serve him properly. "Baba, do you like it? It's my special sauce." He was eating like he's never eaten before. I just giggled when he nodded with his mouth full. "You can have the rest of mine if you want. We've run out of bread and I probably won't finish this." He looked up from his plate and I poured him some juice. "You can have it. I'm not going to finish it." I said and moved my plate to his side if the table. "Thank you. Really. I'm sorry for finishing your bread. I can buy more." I shook my hand. "It's fine. Keep your money. You're car just got stolen. You shouldn't be wasting. How will you get around or go to work?" I said worried. "You're going to need that money for transport." He looked shocked . "Um. Um, okay. But it's okay. It's only a loaf of bread. Also, I'm on leave. I have some money for spending. Since I'm going to be staying here for a little bit I think I should contribute. We can go grocery shopping tomorrow. Are you off work?" I nodded. "Yebo, Baba. Thank you. We can go to the market early tomorrow morning. It's cheaper than the supermarkets." The next morning I woke him with porridge and tea in bed. I asked him what he wanted to wear and set his clothes out and prepared water for him to bathe himself. I got dressed as well. I put on one of my wigs and tied a scarf around it and put on a long bodycon dress. We sat and wrote down a small list and I worked out a budget. He kept on insisting on me not worrying about the price but I still worked out a budget. We went to the market and he paid for everything. I was sure this food would last us more than a month. On our way home men were whistling at me in the street and commenting in my figure. I kept my head down and made sure he noticed how uncomfortable I was. "Let me carry that bag and then take your hand. I'm sure they won't bother you then." I nodded and handed him one of my bags and we walked back home hand in hand. We got home and even as he unlocked the door he still held my hand. We went in and he just stood there looking at me. "Baba, you can let go of my hand now." I said with head bowed. "But I like holding it." He said back coming closer to me. I smiled looking down at the ground. "I have to pack the groceries away." I replied softly. "Just a few more minutes." I just nodded. He eventually did let go and I could pack the groceries away. The next week I would wake up early and prepare his breakfast and lunch before I went to work. When I got home we would talk for hours. He would do most of the talking though. The craziest thing we've done was hold hands and he loved holding my hand. He would even come and get me halfway from work and we would walk back holding hands. We were only friends but I was really enjoying spending time with him. "I got you something." I looked up at him suspiciously. "Surprise!" He said and showed me a box of chocolate. I knew they were really expensive. "Thank you, Baba." I was acting like a kid at Christmas. "Baba, I know you're a married man but could I give you a hug?" I asked innocently. "Yes, I would like that." I walked to him and we wrapped our arms around each other. His fit so perfectly around mine. I let go but he didn't. He only loosened his grip and we looked into each other's eyes. "Can I kiss you?" He asked and my breathing visibly picked up. "I don't think you should..." He looked really disappointed. "But I really want you to." I said and his face lit up. He lips met mine and we started making out. I've never in my life enjoyed kissing anyone this much. 9 I avoided the topic for almost two days after. It was after dinner and I was getting dressed behind the curtain. I was in my night gown when he called me. I took a seat by his feet. "No, please. There's no need to be so formal. Please come and take a seat next to me on the bed. I promise I won't try anything you don't want to." I got up and sat next to him. "Did I do something wrong Zethu? I thought you wanted me to kiss you. I really enjoyed it and I thought you did too." I started biting my lip. "No Baba, you didn't do anything wrong. I did. I knew you were married. I should've never. I'm so sorry." I apologized. "No,Zethu. You did absolutely nothing wrong. My marriage is over. You and I kissing has nothing to do with my marriage." I said and took my hand in his. "My marriage is over. I don't want you to feel guilty. Please don't feel guilty. You did nothing wrong." I held into his hand tighter. "I did nothing wrong?" I asked in the smallest voice I could. "You did nothing wrong. I promise." I nodded and loosened I grip in his had a little bit. "I was hoping we could do that again." He said lifting my chin with his finger. He came closer to me and I closed the gap. I moaned when he slipped his tongue in mouth. It drove him crazy and he picked me up and put me on his lap. His hands were rubbing up down my thighs until he finally had the courage to touch my ass. He groaned into me and I couldn't help but moan and he started playing with my ass through my night gown. He broke our kiss and started kissing and sucking on my neck. I let out small moans to make sure he knew I was enjoying it and then he moved up to my lips again. He started to pull my night gown off and when I felt the cold air on my nipple I pulled away. I pulled my night gown back on quickly. "Not so fast Baba. Not yet." I said and went back into my usual pose with my head down. "Okay, we won't do anything you don't want to. How about we get under the covers and just kiss. Nothing else. It's cold in here and I never want to let you go." I nodded and we got under the covers.He got on top of me and pulled the blankets over us and we kissed until we fell asleep. I woke up the next morning for work and I couldn't even get out of the house. He couldn't get enough of me. I was late and Xolisa was pissed. There was talk about favouritism and he had to give me a warning. During break I told Sethu all about what was happening and she was really excited for me. "I've got some good news too." She said and gave out two coughs. That's when I saw the ring on her finger. We went mad. We were screaming and jumping around. "When? How?" I asked out of breath from the jumping. "This morning right after we had sex. He turned over to his side and when he turned back he had the ring in his hand." We squealed again. The rest of the day was slow. It wasn't really a time in the month when people had money to come buy meat and alcohol. Afterwork Moses was waiting for me at his usual spot and we walked home. When we got home he started kissing me immediately. "I couldn't wait fo you to come home." I giggle and kissed him again. During dinner we spoke about our day. "I got my laptop and even though I'm on leave I did a few things for work. How about you?" I just sighed. "I got a written warning today because I was late." I said taking a sip of my tea. "I'm so sorry, Mamakhe. I didn't mean for that to happen." I looked at him and he took my hand in his. "Mamakhe?" I asked at the new term of endearment. "Oh,sorry. It just slipped out." I couldn't help but smile. "I like it." He smiled too. "Okay,then. Mamakhe,it is." "Mamakhe, I have something to tell you." I nodded. "I've told my mother about you." My head snapped towards him. "Baba! Why?! You're still a married man! You can't tell your mother what we're doing here. She'll hate me." He took my hand again. "I didn't tell her everything. I just told her how you took me in and looked after me. She's very grateful to you. She just wants to meet you and thank you." I was still nervous about it. "I was wondering if we could do tea with her on Sunday." I was scared but I nodded anyway. This could be either very good or very bad for me. When Sunday came I made sure everything was spotless. I even had to borrow another chair from a neighbour and made sure I was covered from head to toe so I looked respectable to a mother. "You don't have to be nervous, Mamakhe." I couldn't help but be. "You can't call me that when she gets here. You can't or she'll know." He agreed trying to calm me down. He got a text and went to fetch her and navigate her the rest of the way to my shack. "Oh, this is her! You forgot to mention how beautiful she was Moses." She looked very fancy. She was wearing a blue suit and she was very loud. "You must be Ziphozethu. I'm MaRadebe, Moses's mother. Oh, it's so lovely to meet you. I'm a hugger. Come here!" She pulled me towards her and hugged me tightly. We all took a seat and I boiled the water. "There is not enough words in any language for me to thank you for what you have done for my son. You know, Moses was broken until he met you. You are a blessing to him and to our family. Oh, and you're so beautiful." I smiled shyly. "Moses and I were discussing something. He doesn't seem to think you'd agree but I have to ask. We owe you the world. I have a house right here in this area. I was hoping you'd move in there so you can get out of this shack. It's the least we could do." I was shocked and I wanted to hop on this but I needed to think long term. I needed to think of my image. And what if this was a test to see if I only wanted his money. "Um, thank you ma. It's very generous but I don't think that is necessary. You don't owe me anything. It's okay. I was just trying to help out. Baba, you could move into your mother's house so you're more comfortable. I'm fine here." She held my hand. "Zethu, we really do owe you the world. If it weren't for you Moses would've been dead or in a deep depression. You went out of your way to help him. Let us help you. Please. As a family we've discussed this already. We want to give you the house as a gift. It will be in your name." I was shocked into silence. I felt a tear run down my cheek. "MaRadebe, that's very generous. Please pass my thanks onto the rest of the family but I can't accept it. I'm sorry ma. I'm fine here." I wiped the tears that were running down my face. "Zethu, come on. This is good for you. You can't live in a shack forever." Moses said and I wiped the tears that wouldn't stop falling. "Baba, I'm not a charity case. I'm fine here. I'm okay." His mother got up and made me get up too. "Zethu, we know you're not a charity case. We weren't making you one. You're a strong and a good woman. You sacrificed so much for my son. This is a house I'm not using because I'm never in the city. I'm asking you to take it off my hands. It'll be your house. I won't ask you for anything besides maybe letting my son stay with you." She said and laughed a little. "This is no strings attached. I won't take no for an answer Zethu. I will force you to sign those papers. Come on. Don't cry." She wiped my tears for me. "Come on, Zethu. I will bring the whole family here to try and convince you. Take the house please. It's not much but it's a house and I believe you can make it a home. What do you say? Say yes. Come on. Say yes." "What if... What... What if you want it back?" I stuttered. "Oh, baby no. I'll never do that. I promise. Your such a beautiful soul. Don't think like that baby. The house is yours. Don't cry baby." She wiped my tears again. "Okay, but on one condition." Her face lit up. "Yes, anything." I wiped the tears that kept falling. "My condition is that Baba owns half of the house so that he doesn't have to end up on the street again." "Oh my god." She started crying and hugged me tightly. "You are a gift from the heavens." She couldn't believe it. She wouldn't let go of me. I'm in. Now it's time. I need to take this to the next level. 10 Sethu was busy helping me pack the last of my things and Moses and his mother were outside talking. "Girl, shh so we can hear." She said and we stopped packing. "I'm going to be so mad if you don't marry this girl." His mother said. "She's perfect. She well- mannered, she's respectful and she's beautiful. And don't think I haven't noticed the way you two look at each other. You're in love, Moses. A mother knows. A mother always knows. Marry her before it's too late." I was shocked. I wanted to scream so bad I had to cover my mouth. "I know, Ma. I've been thinking about it since I met her but Nozipho refuses to divorce. She says if we do she's taking everything with her because I started my company with her inheritance." Oh, wow. We can't have that. I'm not marrying a broke man. "This is why I insisted you marry her under customary law. I never like her and I knew the day would come when you met the real love of your life. You can take Zethu as a second wife." Sethu and I looked at eachother completely shocked. She signaled that we take the boxes out. We put the boxes at the back of the van. I saw MaMlambo running towards me. "Good morning. I just wanted to come give you this. It's some food for lunch in your new home. I heard you were moving." She said out of breath. "Thank you, Ma. I'm not going far. I'm just a few roads over." She still hugged me tightly even though I wasn't leaving the neighborhood. I gave her my keys to give to someone who needed it and we were off to my new house. I can't believe I have a house. I don't even care what it looks like it's an actual house and it's mine. We drove to the nice side of the neighborhood and stopped in front of a house with a huge gate. It was just a normal one floor house but to me it was huge. It had three bedrooms, a bathroom, a lounge and a big kitchen. The house was fully furnished and the yard was big. "Come, Zethu before you start bringing things in." There were papers, a pen, four champagne glasses and a bottle of champagne on the small kitchen island. Moses and I signed the papers and he popped the champagne. We drank champagne and when we were done celebrating his mother had to go. We packed all if our things away. I have never had a closet before. Everything was so exciting for me. "Okay, now that we're done unpacking I'm going to go. Have fun you two." Sethu said and left. "Come here, Mamakhe." I didn't hesitate. I went to him and started kissing him. "Mamakhe, I want to touch you. Can I touch you?" I acted like I was thinking about it before I answered. "Yebo, Baba." 1 He took my hand and led me to the main bedroom. We laid down and started kissing again. He pulled my shirt off to reveal my boobs. I made sure to exaggerate my breathing so he thought I was nervous. "Relax baby." He said licking one of my hard nipples. "Do you like them?" I asked innocently. "I love them, baby. Now let me worship them." He started sucking and licking at one while he played with the other. He swapped and I whimpered in his ears. "Baba." I moaned trying to get away from him. "Can we get under the blankets first." He looked up at me confused. "Why, Mamakhe? You're so beautiful. You have nothing to be ashamed about." I avoided eye contact and laid there awkwardly. "Please." I said softly and he nodded. We got under the blankets and he continued. He got in between my legs and pulled my skirt and my underwear off. He laid down with his face between my legs. "Oh, it's so wet." He said blowing on my clit. It was driving crazy. "Can I have a tase, Mamakhe?" He asked spreading my legs wider. "Yebo, Baba." I moaned holding onto my boob. He licked slowly up my pussy and it drove me crazy. He started gentle flicking my clit. "Ah! Yes!" I moaned loudly. He started sucking on my clit and I held his head. "Baba!" I screamed as I felt my orgasm approaching. It seemed to motivate him because he started sucking and licking like a mad man and my whole body started shaking. "Ah! Baba! Yes! Right there!" He slowed down as I started coming down from my orgasm. He came up to me and started kissing me. I moaned as I tasted myself on him. "Your moans are so sexy. You are so sexy." He pulled me on top of him and we continued kissing. "Baba." I said after a while. "Yes, Mamakhe." I acted all shy. "I was hoping I could return the favour." I said kissing his neck. He groaned and grabbed onto my ass. I started to unbutton his shirt while I was kissing his neck. I moved down from his neck to his chest and to his groin. I got his pants off and his dick sprang out at me when I pulled down his underwear. I moaned looking at it. I've seen bigger but he was a decent size. "You like that don't you?" He asked and I licked my lips. "Yebo, baba." I went in and licked the length of his dick before taking him in my mouth. I start sucking and slurping and making sure it was the best blowjob he had ever received. And when he came I didn't stop. I made sure his orgasm lasted. I kissed up to his neck again and laid my naked body on him and we went to bed. I woke up late the next morning and couldn't find anything. My phone was ringing off the hook and I finally answered while trying to find my work clothes. "Zethu, you are two hours late! This is the third time you're late. I can't have this. You're fired. Don't bother coming in." "Xolisa please. I won't be late again. I swear. I've been your best waitress come on. Please." Moses sat up in bed. "I don't care, Zethu! I told you this would happen but you still decided to do it. You're fired! Don't come back!" 11 I cried the whole morning. How was I going to pay my brother's allowance and how was I going to pay for all the extra things he needed for school that the scholarship didn't cover. "Morning!" I was crying in Moses's arms when I heard his mother. "What's wrong! Whats going on?" She asked but I didn't have the energy to explain it. "Zethu lost her job this morning." He said to his mother. I was genuinely panicking. We weren't at the stage if our relationship where I could ask him for money. What was I going to do? "Excuse me." I said and went to the room to cry into a pillow. There was a soft knock on the door. Moses cane in and sat next to me. "Zethu, please don't cry. I'm here. I'll take care of you. I have a good job." I shook my head. "I can't expect you to do that." He looked shocked. "Zethu, you've been doing it for me for weeks now. Please let me help you." I shook my head. "I have too many responsibilities with my brother in private school. I can't expect you t..." I was interrupted. "But I want to help. Please let me help. I can take care of those responsibilities." I looked at him skeptically. "Why?" I asked and he looked me straight in the eye. "Well, because I've fallen in love with you Ziphozethu. Now please, let me be the man I want to be for you. Let me take care of you." I bowed my head. "Baba." I said and he placed a kiss on my forehead. "Yebo, Mamakhe." I smiled and looked up at him. "I'm in love with you too." Loud ulilating came from outside the door. "I knew it!" Moses's mother shouted. "I'm so happy for the two of you." She hugged us once we came out of the room. "I don't want to ruin the moment but I do have something that I need to share with you." She said to Moses and we all sat down. "Nozipho has left Buhle with me. She said she had the children for you and you should look after them. She has left to go travel and hasn't said when she's coming back." Moses just sighed. I took his hand in mine for support. "Moses according to our culture and the law because you signed the birth certificates, the children are yours. Please my son. Don't do this. You're a good man. Those children did nothing wrong. They're innocent in all of this. Be the man I raised you to be and look after your children. They deserve you as a father." "Ma, I've been thinking about this for a while now and I've come to a decision on it. I'm accepting my children but I don't want Nozipho back. I don't even want to see her." Moses's mother let out a breath of relief. "I'm so glad you said that because I believe the situation has gotten critical." Moses sat up. "I haven't told you but Buhle has been with your sister for three days now and she won't eat anything. She was breastfed and she refuses to take the bottle. She won't stop crying Moses and she's getting weak. I believe if we can't figure something out she's going to starve to death." I was shocked. What was going on in this family? How could a mother do that to her child? It doesn't make any sense. But then again, my mother did it to my brother and I. "Your sister is on her way now. Moses we need to figure something out." She said and there were tears forming in her eyes. We waited for his sister and when she got here he went to go get her. They walked in with a screaming baby and my heart broke. How could her mother do this to her. They tried everything to get her to eat and stop crying. After a while they stopped trying. "Can I hold her?" I asked Veronica, Moses's sister. "She doesn't like new people but I guess it can't get worse than this." She said and handed me the screaming baby. I held the little girl tightly to my chest and walked around with her humming a church hymn I used to sing for Sicelo when he was a baby. Slowly but surely the crying started to die down into small whimpers. I would kiss her forehead now and then but I never let go. I wanted her to feel safe. This always worked fir my brother after my mother left. "Is she a witch?" Veronica asked. "Shh!" He mother said and Buhle started crying again but stopped immediately after I started humming again. When she finally fell asleep I took her blanket and covered her in my arms. "Baba, she refuses to eat. We need to get her to a hospital. We can't risk it." I could see he was worried but he nodded and we all got into the car. He sat close to me and rubbed his daughter's head while she was sleeping. "She's only four months old. How could her mother do this to her? It's so cruel." We drove silently the rest of the way. We were in a private room waiting for a doctor and Buhle was awake. Luckily she wasn't screaming. She was just looking at me while I was humming to her. "Zethu, you're going to need to hand her over now." I hesitantly handed her over and the screaming started again. My heart couldn't bear it. When he was done he handed her back and I calmed her down while he went to go and get something. "We have an option we could try before serious medical intervention. This is a supplemental nursing system. It's usually used when new mother's are struggling to produce milk. You hook it up to the mother and fill it with what the baby needs and the struggling mother can still build a bond breastfeeding. Maybe a family member can step in and help breastfeeding baby Buhle." We all looked at Veronica. "Wait, I hardly have any boobs and Zethu is the only one that can calm her down." Everyone then looked at me. "Zethu please. I'm begging you. Don't let my granddaughter die." Moses's mother pleaded. I looked up at Moses and he had tears in his eyes. "Okay, I can try." I said after a long silence."They all left the room and I was in there with a nurse. She came in and explained to me how the whole thing worked. I requested that Moses be with me and they let him in. It was basically just a bag that had a tiny tube connected to my boob that she could drink from. "Okay, are you ready?" The nurse asked with a smile and I just nodded. At first Buhle tried to fight it but once she tasted what it was she started drinking her milk. It felt so weird but I was so happy that I didn't care. Everyone thought this little girl would die and I saved her. "Thank you, Zethu. I owe you the world and I'm going to give it to you." She had her fill and I burped her. "Look at her. She's precious. Oh, look. She's milk drunk. She'll be sleeping in no time. You know there are suppliments and hormones you could take so you could be able to breastfeed. You can talk to the doctor about it if that's something you're interested in." I looked up at Moses. "Is that something you're interested in, Mamakhe?" He asked and I nodded. "I'll call the doctor." We spoke about options and I had a checkup right then and there. He prescribed me the hormones and suppliments and when we finally stepped out Veronica and Ma were on the edge of their seats. "She's going to be fine. The doctor has out her in a strict feeding schedule and we have another appointment in a weeks time." They were so relieved. When we got home I laid her down on the bed and surrounded her with pillows. "Come, Zethu. Sit down. We want to treat you." They pulled me to the lounge and I took a seat next to Moses. "We're cooking and you're relaxing." I offered my help but the both of them wouldn't let me in the kitchen. "I looked at you today with Buhle and I've never in my whole entire life been so in love with anyone. I love you." He said placing a kiss on my lips. "I love you too." 12 For the next week we were living on almost zero sleep. Buhle had to be fed every two hours and Moses would sit up with me and help in anyway he could. I could see it was taking a toll on Moses so I got Buhle before she started crying and let him sleep. I was absolutely in love with this little girl. She was the cutest thing and she was stuck to my hip. She wouldn't allow anyone else to touch her. She complained and whimpered when she woke up but when she saw me she calmed down and just looked at me. "Good morning, Baby." I said and she cooed. We spoke back and forth while I was getting her milk ready. There was a knock on the door and I made sure my gown was tied before I checked who it was. It was Moses's mother and sister. "Morning." I said to them and let them in. "Sorry I'm not dressed yet. We just woke up." I said and they had suitcases with them. "No,it's fine. We're really early. We just brought some of her stuff so she can be more comfortable. Where is Moses. We've come to say goodbye. I'm needed at my house in the village." How many houses does this woman have? "He's still sleeping, Ma. Let me go wake him." She reached out for Buhle and luckily the little girl was in a good mood and she went to her grandmother. I went into our room and put the light on. "Baba." I said softly placing kisses all over his face. "Now, this is how a man should be woken up." He said pulling me on top of him. "Baba, wait. Your mother is here." I said and he groaned. "She's here with Veronica. They've come to say goodbye." He looked at me skeptically and I got off him. I handed him his gown and slippers and we went into the living room where Veronica was bringing more of Buhle's things in. "Ma, what's going on?" He asked and we all took a seat. "Veronica needs to go back to her late husband's family just to check on them and I've been called back because a pipe burst at home. Son, this day was coming anyway. I can't stay in the city forever. I have a home to look after." He sighed and sat back in his seat. Did I hear properly. Veronica had a husband? Wow, she was so young and she was a widow. I couldn't believe it. "I understand, Ma. I'll miss you." We said our goodbyes and they left. The whole house was full of baby supplies. After breakfast I started sorting all of it. "Mamakhe, I was thinking we move Buhle into the room across from us and then we can prepare the other room for your brother." He said and I couldn't believe it. He was thinking of my brother? I thought he wouldn't care. "Really?" I asked and he nodded. "Yes, it is your house." I forgot that I owned it. "Okay. I just want to make sure the room is cleaned properly. Nobody has been living here so it's a bit dust. Once I'm done we can start setting the room up." He agreed. We spent the day cleaning and I couldn't believe he was helping me. He set up her cot and a changing table and packed away all her clothes and supplies. We were exhausted by the end of the day but luckily Buhle went to sleep early. We were kissing on the couch and he started taking my clothes off. "Baba, wait." I stopped him and he looked disappointed. "Mamakhe I told you I won't do anything you don't want me too." I just sighed. "I know but my conscience is killing me. We've already crossed the line so many times. I don't want to be known as a..." He stopped me before I could finish. "Mamakhe don't think like that. You know what my wife did to me and even though I'm accepting the children I can never take her back again. Never. I'm waiting for her to come back and then we'll start the divorce process. Please bear with me. I'll make an honest woman out of you I swear. You're the love of my life. Everything I've been craving in a wife. You're my peace. Please don't think if yourself like that." I was getting emotional. Was I falling for this man too? "Baba, it's just that the last man I was with didn't treat me well. He said he loved and he'd look after me but he was only using me for sex." I admitted. Part of that was true. Dumisani was using me for sex but I was using him for money. "Mamakhe, look at me. Look at me." I looked up at him with my sad eyes. "I love you with every fibre of my being and I'll prove it to you everyday. When I say I'll take care of you and your brother I mean it. I'll take care of your every need and want and I'll wait for you as long as it takes. As long as it takes. Just having you in my arms is a dream come true. Just look what you're doing for my daughter. How can I not love you after that. You saved her and you saved me and I can't thank you enough." I laid my head on his chest. "I love you so much, Baba. I'm sorry I doubted you. All of this just seems like a dream come true for me." We fell asleep on the couch that night. Buhle was doing great and I was still on my medications. I was counting the days until I could start producing milk even though there was no guarantee. Moses and I sat down and worked out a budget for Sicelo and I was so happy my brother would be comfortable at school. He even upgraded his meal plan. Moses started working from home and when I asked him what he did he said he ran a finance department for a very big company. I knew it was a lie but I just went along with it. I was so happy when my milk finally came in. I still needed to use the nursing aid and I had to massage my breast to stimulate milk supply but Moses liked doing that part. Buhle was getting big. She was six months old and her grandmother came to visit and bring her gifts. I was getting ready for bed when Moses said he needed to talk to me. I sat on the floor in front of him. "I still can't get hold of Nozipho, my wife and there's a short school holiday coming up. It's only a week. My mother is taking the girls as she usually does at this time of the year. But this has gotten me thinking. I have a very big favour to ask you." He sighed before he continued. I could see he was scared. "I know we're not married yet and I am planning to marry you... But I just wanted to ask you... I wanted to ask you if you'd be willing to step in as the girls' mother if Nozipho never comes back?" I looked up at him with a soft smile. I could tell he was hurting so I got up and hugged him. "Of course I would Baba. I love you. I'll do anything for you." I kissed him and he kissed back holding me tightly. "No woman has ever loved me the way you do." 13 I was visiting Sethu in her new house she shared with the pastor. "Sethu, this is getting serious. He asked me to be his children's mother if she never comes back. I said yes but there's still no guarantee for me. I want to get pregnant." She gasped excitedly. "We haven't gotten that far yet. I've been holding out but I want to have his baby. I've been off birth control but I was on it so long I don't even know if I'll be able to get pregnant. I was wondering if you could get me that herbal mixture you told me about." She looked very excited. "I'm glad you brought that up because I've been meaning to tell you this. I'm pregnant." I was shocked I congratulated her and we hugged. "We're moving the wedding up. You'll get you invitation soon. I wanted to ask you to be my maid of honour but since it's his second wedding he said there'll be no wedding party. I'm so mad. He made me choose between a big wedding or a wedding party. I obviously chose the big wedding." I laughed at her. "But I'll definitely get that mixture for you." A few days later she brought me the mixture and I hid it in Sicelo's roomie had to drink some everyday until it was finished and it was disgusting. My milk was coming in nicely and I was able to feed Buhle properly. Moses would spoil me with gifts, clothing, shoes, and all types of things and I made sure he was spoilt too. My brother was coming home in a few day and I had to make my move. I put Buhle to bed and took a shower. I shaved every inch of my body and made sure I was moisturized. I put on my new red lingerie and covered myself with my silk robe. I walked to the lounge where he was watching tv. "Baba, are you busy. I was hoping that we can talk." I said innocently so he didn't suspect anything. I took my usual seat on the grass mat and he sat on the bed. "Yebo, Mamakhe. Is something wrong?" He asked and I kept my head down. "No Baba, nothing is wrong. I just wanted to talk to you. Baba, were in love and I believe that we were made for eachother. You make me feel loved and safe. I want you to make me yours completely." He cleared his throat and I saw him lick his lips. "Mamakhe, are you saying what I think you're saying?" He asked and I took off my robe. "Yebo, Baba. Make me yours. Make me a woman." I stood up infront of him and he immediately started kissing me. I started undressing myself. He frowned when my robe fell off. I didn't hesitate. I put my arms around his neck and started kissing him. "Baba, I need you." In one swift movement he picked me up and put me on the bed. I struggled with the buttons on his shirt and decided just to rip it open. He became impatient and got off the bed and took all his clothes off himself. I've been waiting for this for a while. I was extremely horny and I just knew my lace underwear was soaking wet. He pulled my underwear off an spread my legs. "Baby." He groaned. "You're so wet my love." He got between my legs and lined himself up at my entrance. "I want to savour this moment." He started kissing me again. "Ahhh!" I moaned loudly as he entered me slowly. "Shh baby." "Mmm." I moaned as he started thrusting in me. "You're so tight and wet baby." I couldn't speak. I just moaned as he thrusted in and out of me at a steady pace. "Baba!" I moaned when he started thrusting faster. I could feel my orgasm starting to build. "Baba! Oh God! Yes! Yes! Right there! Ahhh! I'm gonna cum!" His thrust became harder and he was hitting every spot. My legs started shaking. "Wait for me baby! I'm about to..." "Baba!" I screamed as we came at the same time. My legs were shaking as he emptied his load in me. "I love you so much." I shocked myself because it just rolled off my tongue. "I love you more, Mamakhe." He said before pulling out and laying next to me. We fell asleep in each other's arms. I woke up early the next morning and got ready for the day. I bathed and fed Buhle before starting breakfast. I couldn't stop smiling and thinking about what had happened the night before. I felt arms wrap around me and I laid back on his chest. "Good morning, Mamakhe." He said kissing my neck. "Good morning, Baba." I turned around and wrapped my arms around him. "You are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on." I giggled to myself. "And you the most handsome man I've ever laid eyes on. You're my big," I placed a kiss on his lips. "Strong." Kiss "Zulu man." Kiss 1 He moaned in response and I moved down to his neck. "You like that, Baba?" I asked kissed and sucking on his neck. "Yebo, Mamakhe. Say it again." I smiled to myself because I knew I had him hooked "You're my big," Kiss "Strong," Kiss "Zulu man." Just as he lifted me onto the counter Buhle started crying. "Let me go check on her then you fix me a plate." Our morning was peaceful and full of laughter. We spent the rest of the day preparing for Sicelo to come home. "Is it weird that I'm nervous?" Moses asked when we finally finished his room. "Don't worry about it. He's going to love you. I know it." The day of his arrival I wait impatiently. I prepared a feast and instead of Moses being nervous I was. I think I was more excited than I was nervous. "Mamakhe, he's here." I ran out the door to meet him at the gate. "Zethu!" He shouted before he even got out of the car. He jumped out and hugged me. "Boy-boy! You're here. Oh, I've missed you so much. So so much." I held him tightly and couldn't help the tears running down my face. "Okay. Let's get your things. There are very special people who have been dying to meet you." He looked at me like I was crazy. "Me? Who wants to meet me?" I just laughed at him and we got his thing and watched the fancy car drive away. "Who's house is this anyway?" He asked and I shut the gate behind us. "Its ours boy-boy. Now let's go inside." "Sicelo I would like you to meet Bab'Moses. He's a special friend of mine. Baba, this is my brother, Sicelo." Moses reached down and put his hand out for Sicelo to shake. "Hi Sicelo. I've heard so much about you." Sicelo shook his hand but didn't say anything. "Are you Zethu's boyfriend?" He asked rudely. "Yes I am and I love her very much. I hope to marry her one day." Sicelo sighed and looked up at me and then at Moses. "Fine, but only if she'll want to marry you back. If you make her cry I'll hurt you really bad." Moses and I were both shocked but he saved the situation. "That sounds fair. You're a really good brother." A small smile started to form on his face. "Do you want to see your room that Zethu set up for you?" His eye went wide. "My own room?" He asked me and I nodded. He couldn't believe it. We walked to his room and he stood there in shock. He hugged me and started crying. "Shh. It's okay boy-boy. It's okay. It's yours forever. I promise." He was overwhelmed. He couldn't even form words. Moses showed him his closet full of new clothes and he held onto me tightly. He had hiccups from crying. His crying made me cry. "Is it really mine?" He managed to get out. "Its all yours Boy-boy. I promise." Once he had calmed down we walked him to Buhle's room. He gasped once he saw her. "She's beautiful. Look, Zethu. She's opening her eyes." He was really excited about meeting her. She cooed at him and he played with her hand. Baba and I looked at eachother smiling. I have never been this happy ever in my life. 14 The rest of the week was probably the most fun I've ever had in my life. Sicelo and Moses were like old friends. They spoke from the minute they got up until they eventually decided to go to bed. It was amazing to watch. "Mamakhe, I want to go to the village this weekend to visit my girls at my mom's place. Would you like to come with me?" I thought about it and I saw no way that those girls would like me if we just sprang this on them. "I don't think that's a good idea, Baba. They need time and a proper sit down before I meet them." He agreed. "I'll stay here with Buhle and Sicelo. We'll be fine." He didn't want to leave me alone but I finally convinced him. "Okay, I understand but I'm still not okay with leaving you here alone." I sighed and kissed him. "I'll be okay. I'll keep you updated the whole time." We went to bed and the next day I packed his bags. He said his goodbyes to Sicelo which he wouldn't be seeing when he got back because he was leaving for school on Sunday. I made the most of the weekend with my brother. Sethu drove us all to the beach and we had a blast even though it was cold. Sicelo insisted on ice cream. Buhle had her first taste of ice cream and she let out a high pitched scream. She almost fought me for more. It was the cutest thing. I sent the video to Moses and he was in stitches. We got back home and Sethu decided to sleep over. "I've been meaning to ask you this." I started once the kids were asleep. "Can you please google Moses's wife? I don't want to do it on my phone. Her name is Nozipho. Nozipho Gumede." She took out her phone excitedly. "I am so glad we're doing this." She typed in the name and my eyes went wide "What the hell! She gorgeous!" I exclaimed. "How the hell am I supposed to compete with this skinny bitch? She looks like a model and she's dripping of money. She's literally perfect." I was panicking. This woman was gorgeous and she knew it. "Zethu shut up. All of that was bought. As much as men are convinced they want size zero woman they're fooling themselves. You have more ass than she will ever have and that's what a man wants. Curves. Natural curves that you didn't even have to pay for." Sethu tried calming me down. It was working. No man wants to fall asleep next to a sack of bones right? I was trying to convince myself that I wasn't intimidated but I was. "Sethu, what if she comes back and she wants Moses again?" Sethu rolled her eyes. "Calm down. Please! We have a plan for that don't we. When your man gets back you make sure that he puts a baby in you." I just nodded and then we spent the rest of the night stalking her on social media. Saying goodbye to my brother was tough. I was crying before he left. I tied Buhle to my back and I couldn't let go of him after the car stopped in front of the house. "Zethu! Let go!" He giggled and I realized that I had to let go. The car drove away and I cried in Sethu's arms. "Don't worry about it friend. He'll be fine. He's going to school so he can be great one day. This is all going to be worth it and you know it." She comforted me and a car pulled up next to us. Moses got out of the car. "Is she okay?" He asked and took me in his arms. "I don't think so." Sethu answered. We walked back inside and I tried to control my crying. I knew he was leaving. I knew, and I told myself I would be okay. But I'm not okay. He made me some tea and Sethu left. "I hate seeing you like this." Moses came to lay next to me on the bed. "What can I do?" He asked and I remembered what Sethu said. I needed to get pregnant. I started kissing him and he kissed back. That night I made sure we did not sleep. I needed this. I was done struggling. This man was going to be mine forever. The rest of the week I made sure every opportunity I had I took. He was more than willing. He acted like someone who was starved and he just couldn't get enough not knowing what I was actually planning. We were having breakfast and I was feeding Buhle when there was a knock on the door. "I'll get it." He said and stood up. "Ma?" I heard him say. They came walking in and she gasped. "Oh wow. Look how fat she's gotten. And she's eating solids." She said excitedly. "Let me not disturb her. How are you Zethu?" She asked taking a seat. "I'm good and you, Ma?" I asked and Buhle started fussing for her milk. I covered myself with her blanket and waited for MaRadebe to respond. "I am great now that I've seen how well you all are doing. Even Moses is getting fat. That's a sign that he's well taken care of. But my children I've come with not so great news." She sighed and we waited for her to continue. "Nozipho is back in the country. She wanted to see the kids on their week off from school but she got the dates wrong." Oh no. This could be very bad for me. I was silently starting to panic and even Buhle picked up on it. She stoped drinking and started to cry. "Ma, what do you mean she's back? Will this affect Buhle and I?" I asked and she just sighed. I buttoned my dress back up and held onto my babygirl. "I'm afraid so. She's looking for her and she told me that if I didn't tell her where she was within twenty four hours she going to the police." I couldn't believe it. I was going to loose her. "Ma, how can she do this? She left her. She threw her away. She abandoned her and went off to travel. What kind of a mother does that? And now that Buhle is finally happy and healthy she wants to come back and take her? We can't let her take her. Baba we have to stop her. We can't let her take her. She left her to die and now all of a sudden she wants her back? We can't let her do that." I was starting to panic and Buhle started to cry. I couldn't loose her. 15 Since MaRadebe came all the way to the city she stayed the night with us. She also wanted to make sure sure nothing happened with Nozipho. That scared me even more. What was this woman capable of? Moses and his mother were speaking in hushed tones around the house but I could never hear what they were saying. Ma was cleaning up after lunch and I was feeding Buhle when there was a knock at the door. "I'll get it." Moses said from behind his laptop. He got up and went to open the door. "What the hell are you doing here?" I heard and tried looking to see who it was but he was blocking the door. "I'm here for my child Moses. Get out of my way!" MaRadebe and I both jumped out of our seats and she stood in front of me. Buhle started crying and the woman stormed in. "Who the hell is this?" She said when she saw me. "And why the hell is she holding my child?!" I rocked Buhle back and forth so she could calm down. "That woman is the love of my life! She's holding my child because she's more of a woman and a mother than you'll ever be!" Moses yelled at her and even though he was taking my side on this I was still scared that she would take Buhle. "Oh wow, look who decided to grow some balls." She mocked him and I could tell she had an effect on him. "Oh shut up Nozipho. I've had enough of you. You are trespassing. Get out! Out!" She tried pushing past him and ma decided to say something. "Nozipho, if you know what's good for you you'll leave. I'll send you back to that dump you came from. I've done it before and I'll do it again." Nozipho scoffed. "Really? You think I'm scared of you? With all the dirt I have on you and this family? I will expose you one day you old bitch." Moses tried pushing her out but she fought back. "Leave me! I'll go! Get off me! You and your fat fucking midlife crisis can carry on, but trust me he will come back to his wife when he's worn you out you fat piece of shit. So go Moses. Go fuck your plastic wig wearing whore and when you've gotten her out of your system you know where to find me." Moses started pushing her out again. " You can fight me all you want but you know I'm speaking the truth and you better believe I'm coming for my child!" Moses finally got her out and shut the door. I was standing there in shock with a screaming baby in my arms. I didn't know what to do. I didn't even know how to feel. "Mamakhe, are you okay?" I heard Moses say but I was frozen. MaRadebe took Buhle from me and Moses wiped the tears that I didn't know I was crying off my face. "Zethu?" I didn't know what to do. I knew this day would come. I knew his wife wouldn't go down without a fight but I didn't expect her to rip me apart the way she did. But I still knew that I needed to do everything I could to play the long game. "I told you." My voice came out in a whisper. "I told you what we were doing was wrong." I said and he held onto my hands. "Love is never wrong Zethu. This, what we have is more real than anything I've ever felt with that woman. Please believe me when I say I will fight for us. With everything I've got. We will be together, and you will be my wife and the mother of my children. I'll make sure of that. You're my everything Zethu. Please don't listen to anything that woman has said today. She's evil and bitter and she doesn't care about me or our children. She's doing this to get back at me. She doing this because she can't stand to see me happy." I cried in his arms and the rest of the day was spent in awkward silence. "What's going to happen when she comes back and takes Buhle? She could Baba and I won't survive that. I won't survive loosing her." I said as we lay in bed. "I'm working on that. Don't you worry about it." That was of no comfort to me. "I can't loose her Baba. I can't loose her." I said starting to cry and he tried comforting me. The next morning I was up early. I bathed Buhle and made breakfast before Ma was even awake. "Zethu?" Ma cane into the kitchen. "Morning, Ma." She took a seat and smiled warmly. "I just put on the kettle. Would you like some tea?" She nodded and she was still smiling. "Are you okay my child? You've been awake since two this morning." I just nodded. "Yebo, ma. I'm fine." She just sighed. "Don't do that. You've never lied to me before. Don't start now." I looked down at my hands and fiddled with them. "Zethu, I know what happened yesterday was a lot but don't listen to anything that evil woman says. She can try every trick in the book but Moses and I will protect you. I promise. I've never seen my son so happy and in love and I will do anything to preserve that. Knowing that you love him for who he is and nothing else brings me comfort and I will always be grateful for that." "What if she takes Buhle?" I asked and my voice cracked. "Don't you worry about that. We'll sort all of this out. I'm sure Moses has a plan." I was getting frustrated with this nonexistent plan of Moses's. What was the damn plan! He probably didn't even know himself. We had breakfast and Moses said something about meeting with lawyers. Before he could go we heard a commotion outside and there was a knock on the door. Ma went to go and get it. "What are you all doing here?!" She asked and four old men walked in followed by Nozipho. "Nozipho, what is this?!" Moses yelled. "I'm here to fetch my child and my husband." She said smugly and I was terrified. Everyone sat down and I took a seat by Moses's feet. I could feel Nozipho glaring at me but I didn't once dare to look up. "Mamakhe these are my uncle's. They are the elders of my family. Everyone meet Ziphozethu, the love of my life." Nobody said anything. Moses eventually cleared his throat. "What is it that you came here for because you're not getting my child." One of his uncle's just sighed and shook his head. "I don't care what you have going on here. In fact I encourage it but that child belongs to Nozipho. Nozipho is her mother and we are here to take her home." Silent tears started falling from my face. "Nozipho may have birthed her but she is not her mother. She left that baby with my mother and my daughter almost died. She wouldn't eat for more than a weak because she was breastfed and her mother abandoned her. If it weren't for Zethu my child would've been dead. Zethu became her mother and I will not allow you to take her." "That may be the case. But your wife has said if you don't give up the child she will have all of you arrested for kidnapping and she will blast all over the papers. You know how bad that would be for our family and your career Moses. So go and get the child Nozipho so we can go." She got up and started walking to the room. I jumped up to stop her . "No! You can't take her! No!" She pushed me off her and I hit a wall. "Moses!" I screamed but looked up to see him being held back by all four men. Nozipho got Buhle and I tried getting my baby out of her arms. "No! She's mine! You can't take her!" I screamed trying to get Buhle out of that woman's arms. "MaRadebe if you know what is good for you you'll stop that girl!" Someone yelled and I was pulled off Nozipho. I didn't care. I was kicking and screaming do I could get free but I was being pulled away. "Ma! Please!" I cried trying to get free but Nozipho left with Buhle. I fought with everything in me but I couldn't get free. Moses was pushed against a wall and he fell to the ground. The four men left quickly after that. I eventually stopped fighting and Ma left go of me. I curled up on the floor and cried. I needed her and she needed me. I knew I wouldn't survive this. 16 It had been four days and Moses still hadn't done anything but sit on his laptop all day. I was ignoring Ma and Veronica, Moses's sister, came to stay with us. My milk kept coming and after two painful days of ignoring it I decided to start pumping again incase Buhle came back. "That's it! If Moses isn't going to do anything I'm going to go check on my grandchild!" Ma got up and left. I couldn't care less. At least she could see her. I had become that little girl's mother and she was ripped away from me. "Zethu? I made lunch." Veronica said coming into my room. "I'm fine. I'll eat later." My voice was hoarse from crying. "You have to eat Zethu." She said again and I just rolled my eyes. "Veronica, please leave me alone. Please." She just sighed and left. I skipped dinner as well and took a shower instead. I slept on the single bed in Buhle's room. The next morning there was a knock at the door. I didn't bother getting it. "Where's Zethu?! Zethu!" I ran out in my robe. It was Ma. "Get dressed. Buhle needs you. I don't care who says what. She won't eat and this morning she had a fever. Nozipho is a mess and too proud to help her own child. Go get dressed!" She said and I got dressed as fast as I could. Veronica drove and it took us forever to get there. We stopped at a gate and security opened for us. We drove up a long driveway to a house that could only be described as a mansion. I was shocked. "We're here." Veronica said and I still couldn't believe my eyes. "Come, Zethu." I got out of the car and followed Ma. I wanted to admire this beautiful house but I couldn't. Buhle needed me. We went inside and I heard the screaming. She sounded like she was in pain. We walked to a living room. The space was huge and it had big white couches. It was a mess with baby supplies and the once beautiful and confident woman looked a mess. Nozipho was sitting on the floor clutching onto her head. Her face was a mess and she looked like she probably didn't have a shower in days. The room was filled with four elderly ladies and a middle aged woman who I assumed was the maid. Ma went over to one of the woman and got Buhle. She handed her to me and I tried calming her down. "Can I get her blanket." Veronica passed me her blanket and led me to one of she couches. "Shh baby. I'm here." Her crying stopped and she started drinking. "There you go." I didn't pay attention to anything else but her. I heard murmuring but I didn't care. I changed Buhle over to the other side and made sure she was gas free before rocking her to sleep. That's when I finally looked up and saw that everyone was looking at me. Even Nozipho. She got up and left before anyone said something. I laid Buhle down in the cot that was already in the middle of the room. And went to take me seat again. "Who are you?" One of the ladies asked softly. I looked up at Ma for help. "She's the woman Moses wants to marry." Ma said putting her hand on my shoulder. I knew for sure that I had Buhle back but that statement raised some eyebrows. And the way they were looking me up and down told me that they did not approve and they probably thought I was a golddigger. I had no idea how to play this but a risky thought was running through my brain. I had no idea if my relationship with Moses would survive it but I needed to do something drastic. And that something was breaking up with Moses. "Zethu, why don't you go with Veronica to prepare tea and a few sandwiches for us." I kept my head down and agreed. I followed Veronica to a kitchen that was bigger than the house I stayed in. Everything in there was white and gold. The floors and countertops were so shiny I could see my reflection clearly. Veronica took charge and I was amazed to see a giant refrigerator fully stocked when she opened what I thought was a cabinet door. She did everything I just helped her. "You're very quiet. Don't you have anything to say about all of this?" She asked and I just shook my head. "Really? Because if I just found out my boyfriend was this rich I would be the happiest woman alive." I finally looked up at her. "The happiest woman alive? I was living a lie and you expect me to be the happiest woman alive? Moses together with you and Ma decided to lie to me and make a fool out of me every single day since I met you and you expect me to be happy?!" She looked shocked and guilty. "You really didn't know." She looked worried and I went back to preparing the tray to serve the tea. "Zethu, we didn't mean to hurt you." She said but I but my hand up so she could keep quiet. "I don't want to hear it." "Oh, you're almost done. We decided to come have tea here. We don't want to wake Buhle. You know how loud we can get Veronica." Ma said and she giggled with all the other aunts. "Ladies Zethu makes the best tea. Tea made with love. When I tasted her tea I knew why my son was so in love with her." Ma bragged to the other ladies and they were all of a sudden being very nice to me. "Excuse me everyone but I need to make an urgent call." Veronica said and left. "Take a seat Zethu and have tea with us." I did as she said because I didn't want to be rude. They kept going on and on about Moses. They kept telling me how humble he was and that he was a really good man. They kept saying how he would never hurt a fly. I sensed that they heard my conversation with Veronica. "Zethu?" The ladies finally went silent. "Are you okay?" Ma asked and I nodded. "Yebo, Ma." She sighed. "If you're still worried about Buhle don't be. We'll all have a meeting tonight with Nozipho. You need to be there as well for the sake of Buhle." I agreed again and they finished their second round of tea that I made for them. "Moses my boy! Look Zethu, Moses is here." I didn't look and I heard Veronica clear her throat really loudly. I assumed it was some sort of signal to Moses. "Moses, maybe you should take Zethu outside and show her the garden. Buhle might wake up any time now then Zethu's free time would've been spent with three old ladies." One of the aunts said and they all chuckled. "Mamakhe? Shall we?" "Yebo, Baba." I said and they heard hums and squeals. "Oh she's so respectful." I heard one of them whisper. I followed Moses through the maze he called home and we finally reached the outside. "So, Mamakhe... What do you think?" He had a small smile on his face. I had already been working myself up so much that crying was easy. "Mamakhe, please. I didn't mean to lie." He tried touching my hand but I pulled back. "Mamakhe, please." I wiped my tears. "I can't be with someone who lies. How much if it was a lie? Is your name even Moses? How do I know I can trust you, huh? Do you even love me?" "Of course I love you. None of that can ever be questioned. Everything was real. You made me feel so loved and so comfortable that I could finally be myself for the first time in years." I stayed silent and turned away from him. "Please, forgive me. I'm begging you." I stayed silent as he begged. "I think I need some time and space. I don't even know what's going to happen with Buhle. I don't know if I can deal with loosing her and the fact that you and your family has lied to me the whole time." He took a seat and sat there in disbelief. 17 I spent the rest of the day with Buhle. The aunts would check up on us every now and then and they would talk about random things. Moses was nowhere to be found. "Is she asleep?" Ma whispered and I nodded. "I usually bathe her first but she's had such a rough few days we can stray from our usual routine." I laid her down and looked at ma. "We're having dinner and afterwards we'll have a meeting. Come and join us." I followed her to a dining room where everyone was already sitting. Moses sat at the head of the table and one of his uncle's sat at the other side. Nozipho who looked like her old self sat on Moses's right side and the only seats left was on Moses's left. Thankfully ma took the seat at the edge and I sat next to her. We ate and the uncle's and their wives spoke happily. When we finally finished Moses's uncle started talking. "We are in a very complicated situation but the life of a baby is at stake. Nozipho, you tricked us into believing Moses was in the wrong." She rolled her eyes. "Really? He has a mistress and I'm the one getting scolded. "Shut up! Shut up! You have failed as a wife and a mother! Why wouldn't your husband start searching for a new companion? You left your child and Zethu became her mother. I don't care if you gave birth to her. Zethu is Buhle's mother. You abandoned your child to travel the world and you acted surprised to find another woman looking after her." "Actually, I don't care. I don't. You can have her. I'll admit I've not been the best mother and for the sake of my child you should be her parent but this slut will not touch my husband. Try and divorce me for this thing Moses and I'll fight until I own everything that's yours. And you slut, you better keep your hands off my man." The table started protesting. "All of you can say what you want! All of this families riches started with my father's inheritance. I will ruin all of you if I have to. I'll allow this if Moses comes back home and Buhle doesn't leave this house." Ma sighed. "Then how do you expect her to be with her mother. Zethu will have to stay here too. I don't care what you say. Zethu stays here with the baby. You can't expect her to live somewhere else." Nozipho rolled her eyes. "She'll stay here but it's only because I want to keep my eyes on her." Nozipho said and it sent a chill down my spine. "Are we done? I don't feel like spending anymore time with any of you. The maids haven't prepared Zethu's room yet. She'll sleep on the couch." She said as if I haven't slept on worse. "Nozipho, the kids rooms are free." Nozipho just rolled her eye. "I said she'll sleep on the couch!" Ma was about to get up but I stopped her and she looked at me. I just shook my head. "The couch is perfect ma." She still didn't look pleased but she let it go and Nozipho left. "Zethu, you're doing her such a big favour. She should be kissing your feet. You deserve so much more than the couch." I shook my head. "I'm fine ma. Don't worry about me." She just sighed and held onto my hand. "This is not right. Moses, you said you'd fix this and in the last four days you've been sitting on your ass and sending emails. Fix it! Elders, I think it is our duty to stay for a few more days. I'll stay her as long as I feel it's needed to protect Zethu but I feel that your presence is also needed. Will it be possible for all of you to stay." They all agreed. Infact the ladies insisted on it. I cleaned up the lounge where Buhle and I would be sleeping and Ma brought me some bedding. "Veronica will borrow you something to wear until we can go and get your things." I nodded and put my bedding on the couch. "There's a bathroom though there." She pointed at a door. "So Zethu." One of the uncle's said coming in and he woke Buhle. She complained but was back to her happy self in no time. "I'm sorry for that." He apologized. "I heard you make some of the best tea. Since you spoiled the ladies this afternoon we were wondering if we could have some of this special tea." I smiled bowing my head to him. "Of course I can." When I got to the kitchen everyone wanted tea. I left Buhle with them since she was in a good mood and made the tea. Ma got biscuits and I served everyone the way a wife would serve her new family. Everyone was raving about the tea but it was literally just normal tea. I accepted the compliments like a humble Zulu Makoti. "So, Moses, when we've finally sorted out the Nozipho issue should we be expecting a wedding?" One of the uncle's asked and and Moses just poured himself some tea and walked out. I was left standing there awkwardly. Even though I saw the maid I still cleaned up when everyone left to go to their beds. "Moses has people for that." It was Veronica. "I'm just used to cleaning up before bed." I said and dried my hands. "I brought you some clothes to sleep in." She said and put the small pile down on the kitchen island. "He loves you Zethu and you're breaking his heart. Do you know how it feels to be scared that people just want to get close to you because of your money. He finally got a chance to be himself with you and you blew it! You're hurting him! I don't care how you feel about him not telling you about this! You're making this a bigger problem than it actually is! And I didn't hear you complain when he took over your brother's school expenses!" The kitchen was all of a sudden full again. "Veronica! Stop it!" Moses said sternly. "Why? Why should I! She's hurting you over bullshit. Okay you have money! So what?!" Ma started pulling Veronica away. "Can we have some space?" Moses asked and we were left alone. My heart was literally racing. I screwed up. I knew it was over for me. How could I be so stupid and forget that Moses was paying my brother's allowance and meal plan? How could I be so dumb? I couldn't afford that. I didn't even have a job and getting one would be impossible now with Buhle. 18 I was crying real tears and I could literally hear my hear beat. My heart was racing and I had no idea how to fix this. "I'm sorry." I said. "I don't know how but I'll find a way to start paying my brother's expenses again. You can stop paying it. And I'll pay you back." I could hardly speak. "Zethu no." He tried touching me but I moved away. "No, I don't want this to become an issue. Please..." He interrupted me before I could continue. "Zethu stop it. I will continue paying it. It's not an issue for me. I understand that you feel like you can't trust me at the moment but I want you to know that everything was real. Everything." I couldn't stop the tears. "Mamakhe, you know I hate seeing you cry." I came over to comfort me and I didn't stop him. "What the hell do you think you're doing?! Leave her alone!" Nozipho yelled and I jumped out of Moses's arms. "Nozipho not now." He tried saying but she wasn't having it. "Madam golddigger! If I find you touching my husband again I will make him pay and make you watch him suffer." I was terrified. My breathing visibly picked up and she laughed as she left the kitchen. "She knows she can't do anything Mamakhe. Don't let her get to you." He tried touching me again but I wouldn't let him. I took the clothes Veronica left for me and took a shower, made my bed on the couch, and went to sleep. "Mamakhe." I heard a whisper and I opened my eyes to see Moses. It was early morning. I knew because I had just put Buhle down after her one am feed. "What's the time?" I asked sitting up. The couch was very comfortable. I didn't mind it at all. "Its almost two." He said starting to kiss my neck and with all the drama happening it had been a while. I was definitely in the mood. "Baba no. What if Nozipho walks in?" I asked but he got on top of me and I covered him with a blanket. I was wearing a skimpy cotton dress with no underwear so everything was exposed. "Nozipho had almost two bottles of wine. She'll be sleeping until lunch time." He started kissing me and I couldn't help but kiss back. "Baba wait. I said I needed time." He didn't care. He pulled my spaghetti straps down and exposed my boobs. "Mamakhe, if it weren't for this blanket under us you would've ruined my couch. You want this as much as I do. Mm, look how hard your nipples are." He's said licking one. I had to bite my tongue to stop the moan. "Baba, please." I spread my legs for him and he fiddled with his pants. I slid into me slowly and no matter how hard I tried a small moan still escaped my mouth. "Make Love to me, Baba." He started to slowly thrust in and out of me. In no time my legs started shaking and his pace started picking up. We were both close and he put a hand over my mouth. I came and soon after he did too. I was still shaking as he thrusted his cum deeper in me. I stayed inside me and kissed me all over. "I love you and I know you love me too. Please Mamakhe. Don't leave me." I kissed him. "I won't leave you Baba. I was just scared. I still am but you make me feel safe." He pulled out and we cleaned ourselves off. I took off the blanket and replaced it with the extra one. "Can I lay with you Mamakhe? Just for another hour?" I nodded and he laid on the couch and got in on top of him. "Baba, we've got to be careful. I don't think Nozipho was joking. Please promise me we will be careful until you work something out." He promised and we laid there kissing and touching eachother. An hour had passed and he had to go. I was surprised at myself that I already missed him. It was four thirty so I got up and got dressed in my old clothes. I cleaned up around me and waited for Buhle to wake up. "You're already up? That's a sign of a good wife." One of the aunts came in followed by Ma. "Good morning." I said to them and they greeted back. "Ma, I was wondering if I could make breakfast for everyone as a thank you for allowing me to be Buhle's mother. But I understand if it's not allowed. I don't want to step on anyone's toes." The aunt looked surprised. "I don't think you'll be stepping on anyone's toes. I'm sure Nozipho hasn't made one meal since she moved into this big house. MaRadebe, what do you say?" Moses's aunt asked. "I don't have an issue with it. It is after all just a thank you breakfast. Let's go to the kitchen. I'll sit with you and fight off anyone who has an issue with it." We all laughed and went to the kitchen. I was preparing a feast. There were so many ingredients and I loved it. Buhle woke up and I tied her to my back while making her porridge and letting it cool. One of the maids helped me move everything to the dinning room. Everyone except Nozipho came down to breakfast. "Zethu prepared us this feast this morning to thank the family for allowing her to step in as Buhle's mother. I personally feel that we should be thanking her. Thank you, Zethu. I can't wait for the day I get to call you my daughter-in-law." I just bowed my head and smiled shyly. They were raving about the food. They couldn't get enough. The men were stuffing their faces and I was glad I was gaining more points with them. All I need now is for Moses to find a way to get rid of that damn woman. "Ma, can you show me to Buhle's room please. She needs clothes and I need to give her a bath." I asked ma after breakfast. We walked upstairs and passed many doors down a hallway before she opened a pick and grey room. I was huge and in the middle was a white crib with a pink net around it. The changing table fit the decor perfectly, not like the plastic one we had back home. Supplies were organized perfectly and ma opened a door. I gasped when I saw it. It was a walk in closet. The clothes were laid out in such a way that it looked like a clothing store. I was stunned. Did one little girl really need this much clothes. "And through here is the bathroom." She opened another door and revealed a pick and grey bathroom already set up for a baby. She left me alone and I gave Buhle her bath and got her ready for the day. I combed her mini afro out and put a headband on her head matching the outfit. "Let's go downstairs baby. Let's go. We can play in the garden." I took her blanky and a toy or two and went downstairs. "There she is. Zethu this is Thomas my assistant. Thomas this is Zethu." I shook hand with the man in the soft pink suit. He had his hair in finger waves and he had on white eyeliner. I had never seen anyone in white eyeliner before. "Thomas brought you some clothes and a few supplies." I thanked him and he looked at me in awe. "Oh, you are beautiful. I can only dream of skin like that. You need to share your beauty secrets with me one day." He handed me three bags and I thanked him and Moses. "I have to go to the office quickly but I'll be back by lunch time." I nodded and they left. "Did Moses just leave? I want to speak to him." Ma complained. "He said he'd be back for lunch. Ma, can you please watch Buhle while I take a bath." She agreed and they went off somehow to play. I took a shower and used the product that came in the bag. I knew all the lotions and perfumes were expensive because I couldn't say their names. Out of all the dresses Moses left for me I decided on a skin tight bodycon dress. It was tight enough for Moses to see everything but it was long and had long sleeves so the elders would approve. It also had buttons so it would be easier for me to breastfeed. I reached for my head wrap and it wasn't there. I looked all over and finally saw it in the bathtub. It was wet and there was no way I could wear it. My hair wasn't the issue and I wasn't married or engaged to Moses so I didn't need to cover my head but this was the perfect opportunity to gain some "wife" points. "Ma!" I called out. "Ma!" I called again and one of the aunts came and I shut the door quickly. "Zethu what's wrong? You sound panicked." She asked knocking on the door. "Is MaRadebe there?" I asked making my voice as small as possible. "I'll go get her." She said and came back with ma. "Ma, I don't have a doek. Somehow mine fell in the water when I had a bath and Moses didn't give me one with the clothes." I said frantically and judging by her reaction I guess this was actually a big deal to her. "Oh my god. Okay. It's okay. I'll get you one okay. Stay in here." "What's going on in there?" One of the aunts asked. Ma opened the door and explained the situation. "Don't worry Zethu. I've got you covered. I brought a few planning on giving them to MaRadebe's nightmare of a daughter in law just so she got the message. I even got them in very nice prints. I'll go get them. You stay in here. Moses's uncle's can't see you like this. They'll think you're trying to be disrespectful." Okay. This was a big deal. We waited for her and she came running back with a small suitcase full of African print head scarves. "Wow." They were beautiful. I couldn't believe my eyes. Why wouldn't you want aunts like these? "Do you like them?" I just nodded. I'm sure my eyes were open huge as I touched the fabrics. "You can have them my dear." I gasped. "Are you sure? What about Nozipho?" She scoffed. "We can try all we want but that woman will never respect our culture. A culture she herself was raised in. Please, take them." I thanked he and they left me to tie my head wrap in an intricate style. "Wow! Look at you! She's perfect! Look Buhle. There's Mama!" One of the aunts said. Buhle reached out to me and I took her. We went outside. The ladies were sipping on juice that I served them and Buhle and were playing on the grass until she started crying and fussing. I took her inside and fed her and then put her to sleep. "Look at you. Madam shack is looking might comfortable in my home." Nozipho said when I ran into her on my way out. I bowed my head so she thought I was intimidated by her. "It's Moses's house." I said soft. "What did you say? Speak up!" I kept my head down. "Moses is the man of the house. It's his house." I said louder and she laughed. "Listen here you slut..." She was interrupted by Ma. "Speak to her like that again and I'll make sure your life is a living hell." She kept quiet after that. "You're a sorry excuse of a wife and a mother. It's noon Nozipho! Noon! And you're only now getting out of bed! Sies! You disgust me. The least you can do is go make lunch. Your husband will be home any minute. His food better be on the table." Nozipho didn't say anything. She just left the room. We were all sitting at the table waiting for lunch when Moses walked in. He greeted everyone and Nozipho put sandwiches on the table. "Sandwiches? Really?" Ma asked. She never had a problem when I made sandwiches for lunch. She always enjoyed them. "I'm sorry but I'm not eating anything this woman makes. Mamakhe you shouldn't either. You guys can eat but I'll be in the living room. Is Buhle awake?" He asked getting up. "No, Baba. But she will be in a few minutes." I answer and he sighed. "Okay, will you make me something to eat?" Nozipho stormed off. "Yebo, Baba." I excused myself from the table and went to the kitchen. Nozipho was there and she grabbed another plate of sandwiches. "Your time here is going to come to an end and I'll make sure of that." She left and I paid no attention to her. I made baba some chicken and a salad. I got a bowl and filled it with lukewarm water for his hands. I put the towel over my arm and went to the lounge. All the ladies were there with Moses and I could almost jump from excitement. I went on my knees in front of Moses and held the bowl for him to wash his hands. He dried them on the towel. "I told you." I heard Ma whisper and I went to get his food. Again I got on my knees and served him like a good Zulu wife. "Thank you Mamakhe." I had every single one if these people wrapped around my finger. 19 I was finally given a room a week later but it had to be downstairs. I thought I would be able to go back for my things but Moses kept buying me new things. He even bought me a new phone. We stole every moment we could and when his elders left we had even more time. Nozipho was growing more and more suspicious and she stayed home more. She even followed Moses around everywhere. In the few weeks I was there I grew closer to Ma and Buhle. Buhle was already trying to crawl and every moment with her was amazing. I hadn't been with Moses for a few days and I missed him. Nozipho was home but I was willing to risk it. "Baba." I said when I found him in the kitchen. "Mamakhe." He knew exactly what wanted and started kissing me and pulling my dress up. He lifted me onto the counter and spread my legs. "What the fuck do you think you're doing!" I jumped off and covered myself just in time because Nozipho lunged towards me. "I want this slut out of my house! Out!" Moses protected me from her. "Get off! Are you serious! I have more dirt on you than you do me! I will end your career and cut you off! Don't try me Nozipho!" She calmed down and stood there breathing heavily. "Really Moses. You're choosing this whore?" "Nozipho, I swear to god. Talk about her like that again. I dare you. I know for sure that if I have nothing, I will still have Zethu. You are nothing without me or my money " Nozipho started tearing up. "Fine. We're even now. Have your mistress Moses. I guess you deserve to go through a midlife crisis after what happened. But you will not marry her. I will never sign those divorce papers." She left and Moses immediately checked if was okay. "I'm fine Baba. Are you?" He nodded and we hugged. "I'm going to marry you. I promise." He whispered in my ear. We went to my room and finished what we started. I was in the kitchen preparing dinner when Nozipho walked in. "Who are you anyway? All we actually know about you is that your name is Zethu." Nozipho said taking a bite of an apple and chewing really loudly. "Nozipho, leave her alone." I thanked god for Ma. I didn't need this woman holding my sad life story over me. "No, it's a valid question. What's Zethu's full name, Ma? Do you even know?" Ma just rolled her eyes. "Exactly. So, Zethu, who are you?" I guess telling her my name won't hurt. "My name is Ziphozethu Zulu." I answered and she hummed. I was getting a really bad feeling. "Okay. What about family. Mother? Father? Siblings? I'm just trying to figure out who the kind stranger is who's raising my child." This was really suspicious but even Ma looked interested so I couldn't just ignore her. "I have a brother that I've had to raise on my own. Our parents left us at a very young age." "Okay. So you're orphans. Makes sense. What's your brother's name?" This woman was scaring me. "His name is Sicelo." She hummed. "So Moses is paying for his school? Is that why you're here acting like we're in the eighties. Getting on your knees and serving my husband. Following him around like lost puppy. Everytime he makes a peep you say 'yebo baba' like a fucking servant." "Nozipho!" Ma yelled and I just shook my head. "If you must know, Baba is not paying my brother's school fees. Sicelo has a full scholarship to a very prestigious school. After I lost my job Baba insisted on paying Sicelo's monthly allowance because he needs spending money." Nozipho just rolled her eyes. "Fine, but there's something about you Ziphozethu Zulu. I don't know what it is yet but I'm going to find out." She left the room and I could finally breath. We were having dinner when Baba excused himself. He came back with papers and threw some of them in front of Nozipho. "Sign it. It's our divorce papers." He took a seat and continued eating. "You really think this is going to work. I'm not signing this. Do you really think I'm going to leave without what's due to me. My inheritance bought that company." She said calmly. "Nozipho sign the papers. I'm being way more generous than I need to be. I'm letting you keep the jewelry business and I'm paying your inheritance back when I don't need to. You'll find your settlement on the last page. I'm also taking the kids. You can try and fight me on this but you won't win. You sent my children off to boarding school. When they're here they're looked after by nannies. You abandoned Buhle and ran away. Buhle almost died and then you came back, kidnapped her only to realize you can't look after her." She was crying silent tears. "Moses, don't do this." He just carried in eating. "Fine. I'll expose this family for what they really are." Moses was unbothered. "Do what you want Nozipho. I'll survive. Just sign the damn divorce papers so Zethu and I can get married and move on with our lives." She tore the papers and ran upstairs. The table was silent but Baba continued to eat. After dinner the maid came and cleared it off. "Come with me." He led me outside and the garden was lit up by lots of tiny lights. "Mamakhe, you came into my life at a very difficult time and you made me better. You made me a better man and a better father. You made me the best version of myself and I love you for that." He took a tiny velvet box out of his pocket and got on one knee. "Ziphozethu Zulu, will you marry me." He opened the box to reveal a huge diamond ring. My hands were shaking and a tear rolled down my cheek. I nodded. "Yes. Yes, I'll marry you." 20 Ma was more excited than I was. A week later I was still in shock. I was actually getting married to one of the richest men in Africa. Never in my wildest dreams have I ever thought anything like this would happen to me. But Nozipho still refused to sign the divorce papers. Moses tried throwing her out of the house but she came back with a lawyer stating she still had the legal right to stay here. She was never in our way. We hardly saw her. She didn't even have meals with us. We were sitting down to eat and Nozipho actually joined us this time. Veronica and Ma were also there. She had a weird smile on her face and I just knew something was wrong. "I'm expecting guests. I hope it's no trouble." She said but nobody paid her any attention. He phone went off and she smiled like she won the lottery. "Oh, they're here!" She ran to the door. A few minutes later my whole body went into shock as I heard that loud voice. I will never forget it. Two men walked into the room. One was singing clan praises while the other followed behind. I couldn't believe my eyes. I thought I would never see them again. Ma and Veronica got up and bowed. How did they know him? They greeted and the two men took a seat. "Chief, what brings you here?" Ma asked the man. "Your family has disrespected me MaRadebe. So much so that we will be discussing a fine, but for now I've come to collect my daughter." My heart was beating at triple the rate and my whole body was frozen. "Chief, but I informed Ma that I was coming to the city before I left. I said goodbye to everyone. I didn't think it would be a problem." Veronica said and I was completely confused. How was she his daughter. "No, Makoti. I'm not talking about you. I'm talking about my daughter, Ziphozethu." Everyone's eyes fell on me and I felt like I couldn't breathe. "Zethu, get your things I'm taking you home." It was all too much for me. I felt the tears tun down my face. "No." I managed to get out. "Zethu! I will drag you out of here! Living like this is a disgrace! I can't leave you here. Especially now that I've finally found you. You're coming home. After twelve long years your finally coming home. Lets go." The tears continued falling. "I'm not going anywhere with you." I said softly trying to control my breathing. The whole table was confused. "Zethu I will drag you out of here. I do not care but you will not continue living with a man almost double your age who is already married. Is that what you are now? A mistress? Thabo, go get her." I jumped out of my seat but my brother was too fast. He got me and held onto my arm. Moses jumped up and held onto my other arm. "Let her go! She's a grown woman. You can't just come in here and take her!" Baba yelled. "Listen here, the only way you are ever going to see her again is if you let her go right now. We will discuss the fine at a later stage and then if you ever want to see her again you'll pay lobola and marry her. I have five bodyguards outside. I only left them there because I thought you and your family will have the decency to give my daughter back after you turned her into your slave!" He texted on his phone and five big men dressed in black came in. I was terrified and I knew there was no way of getting out of the situation. "Baba, let go." I whispered to Moses. He looked at me and I just nodded. "Let go." He loosened his grip. "okay, but I'm coming to get you okay. I'm coming to get you. I promise." I was allowed to pack my things. "Ma, what about Buhle? Please, Ma. Can you please try and speak to him. I can't leave Buhle here." I cried in her arms. "Shh, Zethu. Veronica and I will follow behind you guys in a car. We live in your father's village. We'll bring Buhle with us and once he has you home we'll explain everything. We can work this out okay. Don't panic. We'll come get you. Stay calm and go with them. It's going to be okay." I listened to her and I got my suitcase. One of those men took it and I followed my brother out. They didn't even allow me to say goodbye to Moses. I sat silently in a car with my father as we left the city. "Zethu, I'm not the bad guy here. You know living with a man before marriage is frowned upon in our culture. To make matters worse he is married." I rolled my eyes. "You have four wives and and nine sons. Who are you to talk?" He just chuckled. "Six wives, sixteen sons, one daughter, and one daughter-in-law." That's when it all came together. "Veronica?" I asked and I knew. I just knew. He nodded. "Veronica told me her husband died." It was the first time I looked him in the eye. "Themba." Was all he said. Themba was my eldest brother. I grew up with him before my mother took us away. It felt like I couldn't breathe. I forced the lump in my throat down as I stared out of the window trying to control my emotions. I wiped the stray tear that escaped and focused on my breathing. I couldn't handle anything else at the moment. I was so focused on not breaking down that I didn't realize we stopped. "Zethu. You're home." I looked at the house infront of me and it looked nothing like the house I left. The small house surrounded by huts was no more. In front of me stood a big double story surrounded by high walls. "Let's go inside. Fikile and the wives have been waiting for us." My brother opened my door and I got out. He sang our clan praises and shouted that the princess has returned. Woman ran to the door where we entered. I recognized three of them as my father's wives. I had never met the other two before. "She's as beautiful as her mother." Fikile my father's first wife said. They all just stared at me. "Are you all going to let us in or are you just going to stare?" They made way and I followed Fikile. She was the only one I remembered fondly. The other two didn't mistreat me. They just never were around and when they were they absolutely hated my mother. We all sat in the kitchen. "I saved you a plate. It's quite late and I wasn't sure when you'd return." Fikile said excitedly. "Thank you Ma, but I've eaten." She nodded and took a seat. There was an awkward silence before my father started talking. "It's two in the morning. We should all get to bed. We have a lot to discuss." They all agreed and Fikile led me to a room upstairs. "The boys are all out of town. We've sent the younger ones to their grandmothers. Your older brother's will be joining us for breakfast." She opened a door for me and I walked in. On the wall above the bed was a picture of Themba and Veronica in their traditional clothes. I assumed it was their wedding day. "Your father informed me that he told you we lost Themba." I just nodded. "Okay, your bag is already here. There's a bathroom through that door. Goodnight Zethu." She said and left. I checked my phone but the battery was flat. I put it on charge and went to sleep. There was a soft knock on my door. I groaned at the sunlight when I opened my eyes a little. "Wake up. Sleepy head." I recognized the voice. "Veronica?" I asked sitting up and rubbing my eyes. "Yes. You're in my room you know?" She said playfully. "Buhle?" I asked and she took a seat on the bed. "She's okay. I just spoke to the chief about her. He's confused but is willing to listen." I just nodded. She left me to take a shower and get dressed. I was making the bed when Fikile came in. "Good morning." She said and started helping me. "Morning." I responded. "We're about to have breakfast. Your brothers are very excited to see you." I didn't say anything. We just finished making the bed and I followed her downstairs. My five older brother's sat at the table with the wives, my father and Veronica. I took the only open seat next to Veronica. "Good morning everyone. Zethu, do you remember Fikile, Gugu and Thando?" I just nodded and they smiled. "Well this is Busi, my fifth wife after your mother and Thandeka my sixth." They also just smiled. "These idiots are your brother's. You remember them right? Thulani, Thabo, Mpilo, Msizi and Malusi." Again I didn't say anything. "If Themba were here he would have something nice to say and he would've given a grand speech, but all I have to say is welcome home sister. We've been waiting for this moment for years." Everyone agreed and I still said nothing. My father cleared his throat awkwardly. "Since we're being met with so much hostility in our own home, I guess we should get down to business. First things first, remove that ring from your finger. You are not engaged until that man has paid lobola for your hand in marriage." 21 My father kept going on and on about how I was stooped so low to become Moses's mistress. I ate what I could silently because I needed to get this over with. Everyone at the table looked worried as my father went on and on about this. It's seamed like they all wanted to tell him to shut up and didn't have the guts. "Now there's a baby involved. Zethu is now the mother of another woman's child and the child is dependant on her. This is a mess! One big mess that we need to get under control." I couldn't take it anymore. I got up. "Where do you think you're going. Sit down!" I couldn't deal with this any longer. "Or what?" I asked him and he looked shocked. After not getting a response I went upstairs. I couldn't take it anymore. I was going to be sick. I ran to the toilet and threw up the contents of my stomach. "Zethu? Are you okay?" I hummed in response and got up to rinse my mouth. I brushed my teeth and then just sat there. "Zethu, we're getting worried. Do we need to come in?" I opened the door so Veronica would leave me alone. Fikile was also in the room. "I'm fine. What is it?" I asked rudely while getting my phone. "Zethu, we're your family. The least you can do is act like we exist." Fikile said and I just sighed. "I was fine. I was doing great without all of you and your husband ruined it. He ruined it so excuse me if I'm not acting the way you want me to after all of you allowed my mother, a woman with no skills and job experience or any money to take my brother and I and dump us in a shack to die!" I was yelling so loud everyone came running upstairs. What was I thinking? Why would I say that out loud. "Zethu." I shrugged Fikile's hand off me. "Okay." Was all she said before she made everyone go back downstairs. I sat on my bed fighting back tears until there was another knock at my door. "We're having lunch. You have to eat." Fikile said. I couldn't even get myself to move. How was I going to go downstairs and eat. "Come on, Zethu. Give us a chance. Please, maybe we can resolve this. Your father has agreed that he's being too hard on you about this situation. Just give us a chance to understand it." Everything felt heavy. I was fighting just to keep my eyes open how was I supposed to go downstairs and deal with them? "Zethu? Zethu! Somebody help!" I heard before passing out. I woke up in a cold dark room. The door creaked open and a woman in a lab coat came in. "Hi Ziphozethu, I'm Dr Dlomo. You're in a clinic. You fainted due to your high blood pressure but there's no need to worry, the baby is fine." I sat up when I heard that. "The baby? What baby?" She noticed that I was shocked. "Oh, I'm sorry I thought you knew. Congratulations. You're pregnant." This is what I wanted but it's coming at such an inconvenient time. The doctor went on to tell me about my diet and exercise and I needed to schedule a doctor's appointment as soon as possible. Fikile and my father were waiting for me. "Are you okay?" I just nodded. "Doctor?" They asked and I didn't even notice the doctor behind me until now. "She'll be fine." The doctor reassured them and we left. I got home and got a video call from Moses. "Hi, my love. How are you doing? We heard you're sick but when we got to the royal house they wouldn't let us in." Moses said. "I'm fine Baba. I just fainted. How is Buhle?" He looked worried about me but he still answered. "I just got her to sleep. Mamakhe, you don't look okay." I wiped the tears that started falling. "I just want all of this to be over so I can leave this house." He looked concerned. "Zethu, you're needed downstairs." Thabo, my brother said. "Baba, I need to go. I'll call you later." I wiped my tears away and we said our goodbyes. I was taken to a lounge and I sat in front of my father and Fikile. "Zethu, with the input of my wife I've decided that we'll allow your baby to come stay here but you have to go through a coming of age ceremony. Your umemulo ceremony will take place as soon as possible so that you can get married." I was shocked. "I can't do the ceremony." He looked confused. "The ceremony is for virgins. I'm not a virgin." I said and he looked uncomfortable. "I assumed so but times have changed. Just this past weekend a girl had her umemulo ceremony. She wasn't a virgin either." I got nervous. I knew he would be furious. "I still can't do it." My voice was shaking. "Zethu, girls all over are doing the ceremony and they're not virgins either." Fikile jumped in. "I can't do it... I can't do it because I'm pregnant." I finally got out and they sat there in shock. My father got up and left. "How far along?" I wiped my tears. "Seven or eight weeks." She just nodded and it looked like she was thinking very hard. "We can still do it. We do the ceremony as soon as possible and then we contact the Gumede's in regards to paying damages for getting you pregnant. Let me go speak to your father." She left me there and I just sat silently. I didn't know what to do. What if we go through all of this and Nozipho ends up not signing those divorce papers. Then all of it would've been for nothing. I needed certainty and I didn't have any of that. "Zethu? Hello? Are you there?" Msizi was waving his hands in front of me. "Come on, we're about to play uno since the wifi isn't working at the moment. Come play with us." He pulled me up and took me to the table in the kitchen. I played but didn't care much. "Zethu, it's your turn. Come on. Being with your brothers can't be that bad. You used to play with us all the time and beat our asses when we cheated." Mpilo said and everyone laughed. "And she was so small so we all acted like it hurt." Malusi added. They laughed about it but I just didn't have the energy. It was like this place drained me of it the moment I got here. Maybe it was just the years of trauma finally surfacing but I just couldn't get a handle on it and for some reason I just couldn't keep acting like I was okay. So I just sat there because if I engaged in any walks down memory lane I would burst. "Okay then. In other news, Veronica has decided to marry. Long story short. Dad tried to force them to get married for cultural reasons after Themba died. They made him realize forcing them to do that would be illegal. They decided to get to know each other first because they were both lonely and socially awkward. Now they're in love and getting married." Mpilo said while the whole table chuckles. "Basically, at first they caused drama for no reason." I was trying to engage with them but it felt like I was disconnected from them and myself. So much was going on. Bad memories kept playing out in my brain. I was creating future disastrous scenarios and that was making me panic. On the other hand I was extremely worried about Buhle and my boobs were killing me. "Um, I think I need to lay down." The banter stopped and they all looked worried but let me go anyway. 22 I was in my room in pain. I didn't know what to do. I didn't have a pump and I didn't have Buhle. I couldn't do it anymore. I took my bra off for some relief but it did nothing. Even just touching them hurt. "Oh, sorry. I didn't realize." Fikile came in and left immediately. "Ma!" She stuck her head through the door. "I need help." I said and finally broke down. "What wrong?" She asked worried. "I need to pump my milk urgently." She realized what was going on. "Okay. Let me ask the younger wives for a breast pump." She left and I wrapped myself in a towel. "Veronica wait. Don't go in there now. I'll call when all is clear just give us the room for a few minutes." I heard Ma say before she came in. "Here, it's not automatic but it'll do." I thanked her and she left. I pumped my milk and finally felt some relief. That's something I never want to feel in my life ever again. I got dressed and let them back into the room. "Thank you, Ma." She hugged me and I hugged her back. "Anytime my child." She left and Veronica made herself comfortable on the bed. I guess it was her bed after all. "So, Buhle will be dropped off here in a couple of hours." I was relieved. I missed her so much. "Finally! A damn smile. The chief insisted I stay here and not at home so we'll be sharing a room. The rest of the boys get back tomorrow so it's going to be really crazy around here. You'll see." Veronica and I were called downstairs to help with dinner. We were chopping and pealing vegetables. "Zethu, if you don't mind me asking, where is your mother?" Gugu asked. "Gugu, leave that child alone." Fikile scolded her. "No, it's fine ma. I haven't seen my mother in twelve years. They all looked confused. "No Zethu. That can't be right. Your mother left here and you were eleven going on twelve. Your brother was only a few months old. What do you mean you haven't seen her in twelve years? We haven't seen her in twelve years. She must've stuck around for you and your brother." Thandeka said and I continued pealing my vegetables. "No, she left us. We got to Durban, built a shack. We were there for a few weeks and then she left to tour with some singer. I haven't seen her since." They were all shocked. Gugu even had her hands up in the air. "Did she take you brother? Is that where he is?" Fikile asked hopefully. "No, she left him with me." They let out gasps and cries. "Why would Zandile do this?!" Fikile cried and came over to me and held me. "Why wouldn't she just bring you back?!" She cried holding me. All of them were crying and I couldn't help it. Silent tears flowed from my face. We were joined by my brother's and father who wanted to know what was going on. "Somebody! Tell me!" He yelled and I wiped my tears. "Zandile..." Gugu tried but she couldn't get it out. "Zandile took the children only to abandon them as few weeks later. Zethu and Sicelo have seen her in years." Thandeka who was more calm told him. "That doesn't make any sense. Zethu was eleven and Sicelo was a baby. Zandile wouldn't leave her child to look after her baby. No." He was shocked. He had to take a seat. "Where's Sicelo now? Is he still alive?" I nodded. "He's at boarding school." Everyone was relieved. After the shock we finished cooking and had dinner. I waited by the window after dinner. When the cat pulled I tried running outside but I was held back. "Veronica, go fetch the child." My father said and she did as she was told. This was really unnecessary. It's not like I would try and run away. Buhle was halfway asleep. "Hi baby. Hey. Are you sleepy? Mm? Are you sleepy?" She giggled and threw herself on my chest and squealed. "You missed me? I missed you too." I kissed her forehead. "Finally! A smile! We should've gotten the baby earlier." One of the wives joked. Buhle didn't want to look at anyone or have anyone touching her she just wanted to lay on my chest. I took her up to the room I was sharing with Veronica and we played on the bed. Veronica came in and got clothes out of the cupboard. "I hear you're getting married." I said and she just smiled. "Yes, I am. Your brothers can't keep anything to themselves. They're worse than a bunch of girls." I laughed and Buhle laughed too as if she knew what was going on. She went to take a shower and I decided to call Moses. "Hello, Mamakhe. I thought I would see you but Veronica told me your father wouldn't let you come outside." I just sighed. "He's being really unreasonable. He even tried to get me to do some ceremony and I just don't want to go through all of that drama." "Mamakhe about that. He sent a messenger to tell us to come over tomorrow morning. We've been trying to figure it out why since we got the message. Do you know what that's about?" I knew exactly what it was about but I was scared he might not react the way I want him to. What if he doesn't want the baby? What if he doesn't believe it's his? What about Nozipho? "Mamakhe, are you still there?" "Yes, I'm still here. Baba I have something to tell you." I don't know why I was scared. This is what I wanted. "I'm pregnant." There was a short moment of silence before I heard a scream. I had to move the phone from my ear. "Ma! Ma! Zethu and I are having a baby!" I heard through the phone. I heard some more screaming and singing. The phone call died and he called back on video call. "Oh Zethu! You've made me so happy!" She started singing band dancing. "Congratulations!" She screamed at the top of her lungs. They celebrated and Buhle and I just laughed at them. "What is happening over there?" Veronica asked coming out of the bathroom. "I'm getting another grandbaby!" Ma screamed and I couldn't help but laugh. "You're pregnant?" I nodded and she jumped on me. 23 Buhle and I were awake early the next morning. She was full of energy but I was exhausted. I was up all night throwing up and I still felt nauseous. Buhle started squealing and hitting her aunt. "Buhle." I whisper yelled to try and get her to stop. She just laughed. "I'm up already. It's fine. Morning babygirl." She laughed and her aunt took her. I tried getting some sleep but just as I was about to the door flew open and Fikile came in. "Morning ladies. Get up we have an early meeting with the Gumede's to try and get all of this sorted out smoothly. Get up." She opened the curtains to let the light in. "Come on. Get ready. Please dress respectfully. You will be present in the meeting, Zethu." I just forced myself out of bed and went to take a shower and get dressed. I had absolutely no energy. I just wanted to lay down. I went downstairs but I couldn't handle the smell of the food coming from the kitchen. I was bent over the toilet vomiting but there was nothing in my stomach. "Zethu?" I heard my name being called. The door eventually open. "Are you okay." I couldn't even answer. "Ma, come help me." Veronica called. Fikile and Veronica helped me up and I rinsed my mouth and brushed my teeth. "Let me get you some avocado on toast and a vitamin water. It worked for Busi and Thandeka when they were pregnant. You have to eat something." I just sighed and laid down on the bed. "You want me to call Moses?" I just shook my head. "No, I'm fine." She just scoffed. "Have you seen yourself. You look dead." I felt dead too. "Okay. I'll look after Buhle. She's having her breakfast downstairs at the moment but I'll give her some of the milk you pumped yesterday." Ma came back upstairs and forced me to eat the avocado toast. I did feel much better afterwards. "Come, Zethu. The Gumede's are here. They're in the royal hut with your father." Busi came to wake me. I made sure I looked decent and followed her outside. It was the first time I had been out there. There was a large hut with three smaller huts on either side. Beyond that was a field as far as the eye could see. I followed her in and she showed me where to sit before she left. I kept my head bowed but I could still see Moses with his mother and uncle. "Here she is. Zethu, we have come to an agreement and we've realized that your marriage into the Gumede family will be beneficial to both families. We have decided that you will have an umemulo ceremony. After the ceremony Moses will publicly ask for you hand in marriage and we will start the negotiation for lobola. As soon as it's settled we will have exactly a month to plan a big royal wedding. We're pushing all of this to avoid any scandals. Moses will have to deal with the issue with his wife immediately. He has this weekend to go talk to her and sort it out. If not both of you can forget about this." Was he really trying to control my life without even playing any part in it? I couldn't believe it. They just decided everything for me as if I was a child. We were dismissed and Fikile came to get me. "Moses and his mother asked to see you. I'll be there the whole time so nothing happens. I was so confused. What was she expecting to happen? It's not like we'll do anything in front of his mother. Also, we've already done everything we could do. I was already pregnant. I followed her out to the back yard again where Moses and his mom stood. MaRadebe ran to me and hugged me. "Oh, I'm so happy for you." We hugged and she spoke about pregnancy and motherhood an did could tell Moses was getting irritated. She eventually stood to one side with Fikile so Moses and I could talk. "I've missed you." I could feel my cheeks heating up. "I missed you too." He took my hand in his and I heard someone clear their throat. My brother's walked out of the house dramatically each with a spear in their hand and just stood there. "Let go of her hand." Thabo said in a deep voice. I sighed and rolled my eyes. He did as they said. "They look constipated." Moses whispered and I couldn't help but laugh. I looked directly at them and laughed again. Moses and I spoke about baby names and wedding plans. I could tell he was extremely excited. We were eventually cut off and had to say goodbye. My brother's wouldn't even let us hug. I put Buhle down for a nap and decided to watch some TV. I switched it on and it was the news. I would usually ignore the news but I heard my name. "Crowds have been gathering outside the Zulu kings house for days now. It is believed that for the first time after Princes Ntwenhle Zulu, there is a new princess. Members of the Zulu nation have been demanding to see the princess for almost two days now." "Ma!" I called out for Fikile. "Yes? Is something wrong?" I pointed to the tv. "Just in and announcement has been made by the Zulu family. The lost princess of the Zulu nation had been found. Ziphozethu Zulu, the 24 year old princess is the long lost daughter of chief Zwelethu Zulu." I looked at ma. "How do they know this?" She just shrugged. "Crowds have started singing and dancing calling on the princess to make an appearance." What was going on? I was so confused. "I'm not even there." I said shocked. "I know but those people might be here in a few days so we need to prepare ourselves. My brother just called me. He's sending the crowds here." It was always something. I could never just be happy. Crowds started gathering that day. The villagers wanted to see "the princess" too. The next morning I was woken up by singing. "Zethu, they're here." Was the first thing. The singing got louder and louder. "Zethu can't go out there. She can not. Thandeka, get those people who did your wedding to come and make Zethu look perfect. This is my one chance to upstage the king." Was he serious? "What's wrong with how I look?" I asked and he was shocked. "No nothing. Nothing is wrong with how you look. We just need to elevate your look a little. When you go out there you must take the whole world by storm. We are not just a small village royal family. The world will take us seriously and you are going to make us relevant. I can feel it Zethu. You're back in our lives for a reason." 24 Besides the fact that we all thought my father was crazy I kind of liked the attention. I had my nails done and my clothes were picked out for me. My makeup was done and the crowd outside became restless. They even camped out there to see me. The stylist helped me get dressed. We went with a simple red dress. I still wanted the traditional look so I was wearing a beaded skirt over it. I decided on a red doek tied on my head perfectly and added a beaded band around my head as well. I looked and felt like a princess. "Zethu. Wow." My father came and his jaw hung on the floor. "You are beautiful." He said and I couldn't help but laugh. "The crowd is waiting. You don't have to say anything. Just smile and wave. There are news reporters out there too but don't be nervous. My throne has been set up and I'll go take my place. Your brothers will lead you out okay." I just nodded. We got in place and I was really nervous. Hundreds if not thousands of people were singing outside. They had been waiting for almost three days. What if I wasn't what they imagined? I heard a praise singer start praising the chief. I couldn't believe they had a sound system hooked up. Where did that come from? Once my father sat on his throne they settled the crowd again. The praise singer started up again and my brothers and I started walking. We walked up and they helped me up the stairs to a stage. My father and his first three wives were there. When my brothers made way for to walk forward the crowd went mad. They couldn't contain themselves. All of a sudden my nervous energy disappeared. I smiled and waved and they started sing again. A mother put her child on stage and my brothers had no idea what to do. I picked the crying child up and comforted her. She could not be older than three. She laid her head on my shoulder and I kissed her head. I was eventually taken away from the crowd and we went back inside. The house was in utter chaos. There were boys everywhere. I couldn't believe my eyes. Even babies on Busi and Thandeka's hips. "Don't look so shocked little sister. These are all your brothers." Thulani said and gave me a pat on the back. We all sat down and they started introducing my brothers. "These are the twins Lungelo and Mandla. They were really young when you left. This is Philani, my last born." Gugu said with a big smile on her face. "These are my sons, Olwethu, Njabulo, Lunga, and Sipho, who is turning one next month." Busi introduced them. "And Xolani and Siyanda are eight months old." Thandeka said with both babies on her hips. I was not going to remember any of thier names. I already forgotten most of them. My father kept the tv on the news and he was basking in the glory of his new found "fame". That evening I spent some time with my younger brothers who were extra crazy because their grandmothers gave them candy that they were hiding. I had to keep quiet about it or else I wouldn't get any. I just went along with it. My pregnancy symptoms were very bad that night. It was so bad that I fell asleep on the toilet floor. "Zethu. Zethu wake up." Veronica was shaking me violently. She helped me up and I went straight into the shower. "Zethu, you still have your clothes on." She reminded me but I didn't care. I stood there with cold water running over me. When I was done I got dressed and took a seat on my bed. "Zethu, I brought you some toast and ginger tea for you nausea. Have you taken your medication yet?" I shook my head and took a sip of the tea. She left me to eat my breakfast and I got a call from Moses. "Morning Mamakhe. How are you doing?" He asked excitedly. "I'm fine and you?" I asked clearing my throat. "I'm fine but you don't sound okay. Don't lie to me, Mamakhe." I sighed. "I am fine, baba. It's just morning sickness. But I'm having some ginger tea and toast. I should be fine." I said and took a sip of my tea. "Well, I'm almost in the city and I'm pretty confident that Nozipho will sign the divorce papers. This won't be like the last time." He said and I was happy but I was still weak. We spoke for a little while and then he had to go. I spent my day with Buhle and my brothers. The house was constantly in a state of organised chaos but everyone was happy and laughing. Things I wish I had. I tried my hardest to give that to Sicelo but I failed at it a lot. I was sitting outside on the porch looking and listening to the rain in the moonlight. "Zethu." It was my brother Msizi. "I brought you a blanket." I thanked him and covered myself. "Are you okay?" I nodded and he took a seat. "Can I ask you a question?" I just nodded. "Do you love that man because if this is about money you don't need him anymore. You have us. We have a family business you know?" I just sighed. "It's not about money. I've been in love with him before I even knew he had money." I lied freely. I had gotten so good at lying that I didn't even need to think about it anymore. I was even starting to believe my own lies. But I honestly do love Moses. I don't know if I've fooled myself into believing it or if my feeling were genuine but something definitely happens when I see his name light up on my screen or when I know that I'll get to see him. This was no longer about living a comfortable life. I just want to be with him. "Okay, how did you meet him." I sighed remembering the story. I even laughed a little. "I lived in the township in Durban and I worked at a restaurant. It was a very difficult time in his life and he was there drowning his sorrows. My boss told me to get rid of him so we could close up but he didn't have anywhere to go and his car was stolen. My boss was getting impatient and I didn't want to loose my job so I told him he could spend the night at my house." Msizi's went wide. "Are you crazy! Something could've happened to you!" I just rolled my eyes. Veronica and Thabo joined us. "What are we talking about?" They asked taking a seat. "How she met your brother. She took a strange man home. She didn't even know him and he was drunk." I rolled my eyes at him again. "Calm down will you. Nothing happened besides him waking up and thinking I kidnapped him." They all laughed. "So here I am. I let this stranger into my house. He was a total mess the night before and I was trying to be nice. I even made breakfast. Anyway when I turned around to put it on the table he was standing there with a knife." More of my older brother's joined and they all were shocked. "Do you want to hear the story or not because I can stop!" They mumbled and groaned but they were all interested. "He realized I wasn't trying to kill him or kidnap him and he apologized. I was obviously in shock but we got over that and sat down to have breakfast. Afterwards he realized he had nowhere to go." "Nowhere to go?! He's a millionaire." Msizi interrupted and I had to roll my eyes again. "Are you going to keep interrupting me?" He rolled his eyes at me. "Anyway, I offered to let him stay with me. And that's how it all happened." They complained about the story not being complete but they didn't need every detail. "Wait, you're telling me my brother, Moses Gumede, stayed in a shack?" I just laughed at her. "Yes." Was my simple answer. "I can't believe it. A man who freaks out when the wifi goes out stayed in a shack for more than two months." She still couldn't believe it. "Yes , it happened." We all had tea together and then we went to bed. "Get up! Zethu! Veronica! You're needed downstairs immediately!" We were woken up so fast we didn't even question anything. We put on our gowns and went downstairs. "Sit down." We sat at the table and I was still half asleep. "Can anyone of you tell me why Moses Gumede and his wife has requested an audience with Zethu." We were both confused and to make matters worse I was nauseous. "What are you talking about?" I asked rubbing my eyes. "Wake up!" He yelled and both of us jumped. "I know the two of you have stayed in contact with Moses! What does he want! I can not afford a scandal right now! If that woman is coming here to blackmail us Zethu I swear to God! I'm not loosing this momentum because of you!" I was so confused. I had no idea what was happening. "Momentum that you have because of me. Don't kid yourself! There is nothing you can do to me. I'm only entertaining all of this bullshit because I want to get the wedding over and done with peacefully and move on with my life without you. I don't care what sort of agenda you have with the publicity stunt you pulled the other day. I know you genuinely don't care. So let's not act like my marriage to Moses won't benefit you most. Now, I don't know what she wants. I haven't spoken to Moses about it yet. I just woke up. We'll just have to wait and see." "Zethu how can you accuse me of not caring?" He almost sounded hurt. "You care? The only thing you know about your son is that he's in boarding school. I bet if I were to ask you how old he is you wouldn't know." There was complete silence between us. "How old is your son, Chief Zwelethu Zulu?" I asked sarcastically and he couldn't answer. "My point exactly." Veronica looked at him in disgust and left the table. I went back to the room and got myself and Buhle ready for the day. I was snacking on crackers while feeding Buhle. It really helped with my nausea and I could actually take my medicine and keep it down. I refused to go down to breakfast because I was afraid the smell would make me vomit and I also didn't want to deal with my father. "Nozipho and Moses should be here any moment now. They've agreed to let your father and eldest brother sit in on the meeting." Fikile said and she just looked tired. I would be too if I was running this crazy house. I was called downstairs. I followed Thulani to the royal hut and took a seat. Moses and Nozipho were sitting across from me. "Go ahead." My father said. "MaZulu I have come here today with a proposition. As you know, Baba and I have had issues in our marriage." What the hell was this woman doing? "And through those issues he found you. I'm very grateful that you took such good care of him and my daughter and I understand that you love them very much and they love you too. I do however feel that my marriage to Baba is not yet over and I think we should try to work on it more before we decide to give up." Oh my god. Was this a break up? Did Moses get his wife to break up with me? "I do have to admit that you are now a huge part of our lives. I don't think Baba or Buhle will be able to let you go. MaZulu I believe that you are the glue that can bring my family back together." I was so damn confused. I didn't know what to think anymore. "So as per tradition, I , baba's first wife, gave him permission to take a second wife. So, we have come here today to ask you to be Baba's second wife." 25 I was shocked. I didn't know what to say. I knew this was a big possibility but now that it's a reality I didn't know how to react. "MaZulu, what do you say?" I cleared my throat. "Let me try and understand. You want us to be in a polygamous marriage?" I asked them and they nodded. "Can I have some time to think about it?" Before they could even answer my father jumped in. "What do you mean time to think? Just this morning you were adamant about marrying this man. Also, let's be honest. You don't have time to think! Soon that bump will be visible and this entire situation you've put us all in will be unsalvageable!" I bit my tongue to keep my tears back. "Answer!" He shouted at the top of his voice. "Yes, I'll be your second wife." I answered him. This is not how I thought it would go. I was supposed to be happy. I was supposed to be overjoyed. This is exactly what I wanted. Why does it feel like my heart is aching. "MaZulu, is it possible for me to see Buhle before we go?" I cleared my throat to make sure I still had a voice. "I'll send Veronica." I said and asked to be dismissed. I went upstairs and asked Veronica to take Buhle down to them. When she left I got under the covers and cried. What was wrong with me? I was aware this could happen but for some reason I wanted Moses all to myself. I didn't want to share him. I couldn't share him and my heart broke knowing that I had to. "Zethu? Are you in here?" It was Fikile. "Your father just told me the good news." She came to sit on the edge of the bed. "We have a month to plan the biggest wedding South Africa has ever seen. Aren't you excited?" She asked but I didn't answer. "Zethu?" I cleared my throat. "I'm really tired ma." She sighed but let me be. That night I was sat down and told I would be starting the preparations for my umemulo ceremony. I had no choice in the issue. They prepared a room for me downstairs that I had to stay in the whole week. I was not allowed out. I sat in there and random girls were there with me. We practiced the dances for the ceremony and they helped me get my hair braided. On the Friday night before the ceremony I was let out covered in only a blanket. They brought the cow that they were going to slaughter and use in the ceremony to me. Later that night myself and all the girls took a walk to the river. The only thing that covered was were out blankets. We started a fire and sang and danced the whole night. We woke up the next morning and bathed in the river. My father's first three wives came to us and gave us our clothes. I wore a cow hide skirt and a beaded neckpiece and headband. We sang and dance our way home. Even though I didn't want the ceremony I was having a lot of fun. The field behind our house was full of people. Huge white tents were set up for the celebrations. We sang and danced an since the cow was slaughtered my oldest brother, Thulani had to rub the cow fat all over me. "Themba would've been the one to do this. I know he's looking down on us and he's very proud of you little sis." He wiped the tears that escaped from my eye. I was given a spear. I had to throw it and where it landed my father had to run and shout our clan praises. When I threw threw the spear it landed right infront of my father. He shouted and danced in happiness. The girls and I danced some more and then I was showered with gifts in the form of money. I met a whole bunch of important people. From business men, to politicians, ministers, and even a few famous artists. Baskets of money were collected and my family members pinned money to me. I met my uncle's and and their sons and wives. There was not a girl in sight. All of my uncle's had sons who had sons. The woman who were married into the family didn't seem to like me one bit. I was getting glares and scoffs. The party went on for two days and it grew bigger and bigger. I even got to introduce Moses to my family. I couldn't stop smiling. Everything just felt right until Fikile pulled me aside. "You need to have an interaction with Nozipho. You will go to her and blow your whistle. She'll put money in your basket. You'll dance together and then you'll hug. Keep it short. We need to cement your friendship in the media before we announce the wedding." What in the world was going on? She was dead serious and I was still trying to figure out what I got myself into by coming home. It wasn't a big deal but is this what the rest of my life was going to be like? A bunch of fake photos for the press? I did as she said and I was surprised that Nozipho was going along with it. She gifted me a stack of money. We danced shortly and then we hugged. The photographers my family hired wouldn't stop snapping. The even made us stand together and pose for a picture. This was crazy. This woman hated me with every fibre of her being and here she was hugging me an dancing with me. The next chapter of my life should be interesting. 26 I was playing with Buhle in the back yard. I was still ignoring Moses and MaRadebe's calls. I didn't know how to feel about the situation. I had to keep on reminding myself that this is exactly what I wanted and for me to get to the end result I would have been in this situation with my family anyway. They weren't all that bad, I just didn't feel any sort of connection to them. I moped around for two days until I got a call from my brother Sicelo. He was doing really well at school and he was making a lot more friends. I knew that he was only making more friends because he had more money but I didn't feel like messing with his happiness. Even though I wasn't trying to make him unhappy, the news that I gave him about being with my father and the family upset him very much. He didn't want anything to do with them and he wouldn't even talk to them. "Zethu, are you planning on coming in anytime soon? We're having lunch." I just sighed and got our things and got up. I didn't eat much. I just fed Buhle so she can go down for her nap. "We've received a letter from the Gumede's. The lobola negotiations will start Saturday morning." Everyone cheered and ulalated. The only thing I was looking forward to was getting out of this damn house. Buhle took a nap and I decided to check my phone. I had hundreds of messages from Moses and MaRadebe. Just as I was about to open them my phone rang and it was Moses. I decided to answer this time. "Hello." I heard a sigh of relief on the others end of the phone. "Mamakhe, thank God you answered. I was about to come knock at your door." He tried joking. "Baba, what's going on?" I asked after a brief silence. "Mamakhe, what do you mean?" His question annoyed me. "What do I mean? We went from getting married to me being downgraded to a second wife. And you sprang this news on me infront of my father giving me no choice. You've never even spoken to me about isithembu. Never have you insinuated that we'll ever be in a polygamous marriage with that woman." I could feel myself getting angry. "Mamakhe, this is what's good for everyone involved. Nozipho and I have decided to stay married. Her and I will be taking a break and during that time you and I will spend our time together and build our marriage. Once we all sit down and discuss we will decide on a time frame. After that time has past we'll come together and figure out how we'll live together. This is not a downgrade Mamakhe I promise. I believe our love is strong enough to make this work." I didn't know what to say. "Zethu! Come down here please." I heard Fikile yell. "I have to go. Bye, baba." I switched my phone off and went downstairs. "You're father wants you dressed in full traditional clothing for the lobola negotiations this weekend. Let's take a walk down to my friends house. She does beadwork and makes our clothing." I didn't argue. I just went with it. I made sure I looked decent and followed her and my eldest brother outside. There was still one random photographer out there who followed behind us at a distance taking pictures. The village actually looked really beautiful. Everything your eyes saw was bright green because of the rains. The village was a mixture of brick houses and huts. We even past a lodge on our walk and Thulani explained that it belonged to our family. "Oh, here they come. They probably heard we were out walking. Those two over there are our maids. They are on holiday but they've been pestering me to come back early ever since they heard about you." The two ladies approached us and bowed as they greeted us. "Indlovukazi, we were wondering if you had gotten our messages to return to work?" They asked after all the formalities. "Yes, I've gotten it. And yes, you can return. We need your help this weekend. If you can, come in tomorrow." They thanked her and said goodbye. They squealed as they walked away. I reached a small house on a dirt road. The elderly started ulilating. "Royalty is at my doorstep!" She shouted at the top of her lungs. She greeted us and then Fikile explained what we needed. "Her father wants her to wear leopard skin. He has that for her so we need beads, a skirt, and those beautifully beaded shoes." She pointed at the sandals on the table. I got colourful beaded bands for my arms, ankles and my head. I went with the biggest beaded neckpiece she had and Fikile chose my beaded skirt for me. She paid for it and we walked back. I was smiling and waving at people who came out to see me and we finally reached home. Buhle was up and screaming. All the younger boys just stood there staring at her in shock. "What is is baby? Huh? What's wrong?" I picked her up and she laid her head on my shoulder. She was still crying but not as loud. "She woke up like this." Veronica said handing me her blanket. "Did you have a bad dream?" She was moody the whole day and I had to keep her on my back while Fikile and Gugu taught me "Makoti" duties and rules I would have to follow. They tried teaching me how to start a fire, cook a traditional meal, most importantly pap. These were things I had to learn as a child to survive. Eventually they stopped telling me what to do and I cooked dinner for the whole family. The other wives came out and watched me as if I was putting on a show. I could deny it but I was putting on a show. I had three fires going and I was making a full meal for more than twenty people with a baby on my back and absolutely no help. My dad even came out and watched for a few minutes. I was waiting for him to say something but he never did. He just went back into the house. Fikile helped me dish up for everyone and we all sat down to eat. "MaZulu, the food is delicious. I'm very impressed. Tomorrow morning we'll go and collect wood early and you'll make pap for breakfast. The elders will be joining us. After breakfast I'll teach you how to make umqomboti. We'll serve tea and prepare lunch as well as supper. The elders are nervous about your ability to be a good wife because you grew up without the proper guidance but I'm sure they'll change their mind when they see you in action." The next morning we were up early. I wore my traditional skirt I got for my coming of age ceremony and this time I was allowed to wear a top with it. I wore a beaded headband and when Fikile was satisfied we walked to a bush and gathered fire wood. She taught me how to tie it and how to place it on my head. I got the hang of it quite quickly. The sun started rising on our way back. Out of one of the houses a car pulled out. It was Nozipho. She waved and drive off. "Is that where MaRadebe lives?" I asked when we continued walking. She just hummed in response and stayed quiet after that. I started the fire when we got home and went to get Buhle. I fed her while fighting my nausea and then tied her to my back. I made breakfast and was introduced to my elders. I sat respectfully one my grass mat with my head bowed. I said nothing as they scolded me for having sex and falling pregnant before marriage. I then went on to make tea for the four old men and their wives and then breakfast was served. Chairs and a huge tent was delivered and I asked ma what is was all for. "Both families have decided we want to settle this as quickly as possible. So we are doing the lobola negotiations and the umembeso ceremony on the same day. A month from now we'll do the umabo ceremony and you'll be officially married." She answered while she was teaching me how to make traditional beer. "And the umembeso is?" I asked still confused. "Moses is introduced as the son in law. He's family presents our family with gifts. After the presentation of gifts he will be allowed in our yard and home. Then an aunt from his side will present you with a new dress and dress you symbolising that you are now a woman who is leaving her family and getting married into a new family. We drink, eat, sing, dance, and celebrate the union of the two families." I spent those two days cooking and serving the family which really got them off my back. I couldn't wait for Saturday so I could continue with my life. 27 "Come ladies, get up. I know it's two in the morning but we have a big day ahead of us. The Gumede's will be here by five." Fikile said putting the light on. I sat up in bed to try and wake up but I was still half asleep. I took a shower and afterwards everything was laid out on the bed. Veronica helped me braid my hair down and then she installed a beautiful long wig. I opted not to wear makeup. Just a little bit of eyeliner and lipgloss and then I got dressed and waited. "They are thirty minutes late. They already paid a fine but they're still not being let in the gate." Veronica came to tell me and then she ran back downstairs to see what was going on. I ate some crackers while feeding Buhle since I had nothing to do. "They're in. They paid a fine and then they paid a fee to enter the gate. Now all they have to do is pay to start the negotiations and then we wait." Veronica was very excited. She was running up and down the stairs like a headless chicken keeping me updated on the smallest things. "Makoti!" Veronica sang excited as she came up the stairs. "They'll be calling you in a minute. You need to come downstairs. I made sure Buhle was still sleeping and I went downstairs. The ladies were seated in the living room dressed in their traditional clothing. The room looked very colourful and they all looked beautiful. A photographer was taking pictures of me as I entered the room. "You look so beautiful my child." Fikile said and hugged me. Her and I took a photo together and then I took a group photo with all of my father's wives and another with the wives of the elders. My brother's were nowhere to be seen. One of my brothers eventually came to come get me. We walked to the royal hut and I took my place on the grass mat. "This is the only daughter we have in our house. I present you Nkosazana Ziphozethu Zulu. Is this the girl you've come to pay lobola for?" My oldest uncle asked. "Yebo, this is the flower we've come to pick from your garden." One of Moses's uncle's replied. "MaZulu, these are the elders of the Gumede family. Is this the family you want to marry into?" My uncle asked me. "Yebo, Babomkhulu." I answered and they let me out again. I went back in the house and saw the two maids from the other day. They were busy preparing ingredients for food. Everyone was busy with something and I had nothing to do so I decided to make tea for all the ladies. They appreciated a lot and when I'm was do e Buhle finally woke up. "She's up?" I just nodded. Veronica passed me a bag. "Nozipho sent this. It's for her to wear today." I took the bag skeptically. "Nozipho is here? I saw her leave yesterday morning when we fetched wood." Everytime I thought of that woman I got a bad feeling. "Yes she's here. She went to the city yesterday. She went to go buy the dress my family will be dressing you in. Also, because you'll be sisters she will help in dressing you just to show that she accepts you and agrees with the marriage. Almost like a welcoming gift." If I was being honest I don't didn't know how any of these traditional things worked. I gave Buhle her bath and didn't dress her in her beautiful African print dress yet just Incase she messed on it. I combed her tiny afro out and fed her again. She was getting really chubby. "Zethu!" Veronica came running into the room again. "Ma just told me that your father asked for four hundred cows." My eyes went wide. That was way too much. I was just glad they weren't asking for actual cows. Depending on prices of buying a cow they will decide how much a cow is worth. My family will Then decide how many cows the groom has to pay. He can either pay it or they can negotiate for a lower price. "Don't look so worried. Yes it's a lot but Moses has the money. Ma said that includes damages for getting you pregnant before marriage." I was still pissed off. Ma walked in at that moment. "The Gumede's have just gone outside to discuss it with Moses. That's a lot of money for lobola even taking into consideration that you're a princess." That got me worried. "Ma do you know how much a cow is worth?" She looked like she didn't want to say. "They're working with two thousand five hundred per cow. If you multiply that by four hundred it's one million Rand." My whole body froze. I couldn't believe this. "Why would he ask for so much?" I started panicking. "Calm down Zethu. It's still early in the negotiation process. It can come down." She tried calming me down but it wasn't helping. "I think I'm going to be sick." I ran to the toilet and threw up. I sat in my room alone trying not to worrying. "Zethu!" I got myself together and went downstairs. They started ulilating and I was confused. "They are calling all of us. The only reason they could be calling us is if the negotiations are complete." I could help the smile on my face. I sense of relief swept over my whole body. I followed the ladies and we all sat down. My brother Thulani started speaking. "We have called you here to tell you that the negotiations have been successful. We have agreed on a price and it has been paid in full. The ladies started ulilating and singing. After that the whole house descended in chaos. Everyone else as busy with something. I went outside and the white tent was set up on one side of the yard tables and chairs were set up underneath it and it was decorated beautifully. "Zethu, guess what!" I was once again Veronica. "What? I'm bad at guessing." She couldn't contain herself. She just squealed. "I just heard the chief and Ma speaking. They asked for four hundred cows and my uncle's left to consult with Moses. When they came back they said they were very offended because Moses and the family feels like you are priceless. They demanded to pay double. Moses paid two million Rand for your hand in marriage. They transferred the money there and then." Just then we heard shouting and singing coming from the house. "Everyone probably just got the news." We went inside and sang and danced before everyone got back to their tasks. I was out in a room downstairs that was completely white. There was a beautiful white and gold couch the window that I was sitting on when I started hearing the singing. The singing came from far so I was guessing that was Moses's family approaching. My family also started singing and they were singing a different song almost like the two families were competing . Fikile and my father came into the room. Fikile had a traditional zulu hat in her hand and a beaded veil. "I've been looking for this the whole week and I finally found it in your mother's hut. This hat is hers and it's what her mother gave her to wear on her wedding day. She always said she would give it to you. We may not know where she is or what happened to her but I think today she would be very proud of you." Fikile placed the hat on my head and tied the small veil made of beads around the hat to cover my eyes. My father gave me a small spear to hold in my hand and I followed them out. I had no idea where all of these people came from but all of a sudden there were a lot of people in my yard. As I made my way through the crowd I started seeing Moses family at the other side of the gate. Grass mats were laid out like a red carpet for me to walk on. When I got to the end of the grass mats I cane face to face with Moses on the other side of the gate. I managed to keep my head down but I couldn't fight the smile. The singing continue and I took a seat. Moses uncle's place money on the ground and the whole crowd started ulilating. The gate was opened and my great uncle helped me up and handed me over to Moses. The crowd then started singing and dancing and we eventually made our way to the tent for lunch. We ate and laughed and everyone seemed to be getting along. After lunch Nozipho and one of Moses aunts came to get me. We were followed by photographers wherever we went. We walked into the same room and on the bed lay a beautiful floor length mermaid off the shoulder dress. The dress was a beige as well as the hat. The hat was the same colour and the bead work was brown beige and white. It was beautiful. They dressed and it fit me perfectly. My beads were also off the shoulder and it was a huge piece. It reached down to my arms. Nozipho insisted on putting my hat on for me and made sure the photographer took a photo of her doing it. She placed the beaded veil that went with the outfit on my head and then we went back outside. The singing and dance continued. I was sat on a grass mat and showered with gifts. Moses family brought gifts for mine. Gifts that traditionally consists of blankets, pillows, grass mats, traditional pots, beads, printed fabric, doeks and the list goes on. After the gift exchange the celebrations began again. At the start of the sunset my father led us all to the highest point of the village. He said a few words welcoming Moses as his new son in law and then he nodded to Moses. Moses stepped forward and got on his knee with the sunset in the background. He opened the little box and I was shocked to see a new ring. I didn't even have my old engagement ring that long and he already bought a new one. It was huge. I had no idea how my finger would be able to hold it. He put it on my finger and the crowd started dancing and singing. Both of us weren't sure if we could kiss so he just placed his forehead on mine. "I love you MaZulu." "I love you too bab'Gumede." 28 Our families had a great time. It was a blessing in disguise that they already knew eachother because these things could get messy. Moses and I were standing at the back of the house where all the fires were burning. + "I missed you so much." I said when I realized I didn't want to let go of him. "I missed you too, Mamakhe." I smiled and kissed him. "Am I coming home with you?" I asked hopefully. "I'm not sure yet. We would have to discuss it with your father. We still have one more ceremony until we're officially married and you know how traditional your father is." I just sighed in disappointment. "I know, Mamakhe. There is nothing that I want more than to wake up with you by my side." I just laid my head on his chest. "I don't understand. We've done everything except that last ceremony. I'm already pregnant. It's not like anything else can go wrong. Why won't they leave us to be happy?" He held me tighter against him. "Think of it this way. It's easier for us to start our marriage the right way to appease our families and ancestors than to jinx it and struggle just because we couldn't wait one month to live together. We'll wait, I'm sure we'll be able to see and visit eachother and then when we get married it will be smooth sailing." I sighed again and then we just stood there in a comfortable silence. "Lovebirds! It's time to part ways." It was Veronica. "Come on! Say goodbye so that I can go to bed and Ma can stop bothering me to check on you." We kissed and then walked to the front of the house where his family was busy leaving. We said our goodbyes and the crowd left. I went upstairs and luckily for me Buhle was already asleep. I took a shower and went to bed. "You were happy today." Veronica said randomly. "It was nice to see." We fell asleep and I woke up early again. I didn't want to this time but ma came to get me. At least now I didn't have to cook on the fire. She let me use the kitchen. I made tea for the ladies and they made tea for their husbands who were sitting outside and eating leftovers for breakfast. "You can't be tired already. MaRadebe is really strict. I'm sure she will make you stay here in the village and fulfill your Makoti duties." One of the great aunts said. I continued making the kids and the wives their breakfast. I was drinking tea outside while everyone was eating. "Was that a yawn? You're about to be a wife. You can't be tired. A wife wakes up first and sleeps last. You slave away all day to make sure your family and kids are comfortable and at night you make sure your husband is satisfied. And the next day you do it all again. There's no time to be yawning." What was happening? Why were they obsessing over the fact that I was tired. If I needed to yawn I needed to yawn. There was still a lot of food left and Veronica helped me heat it for lunch. "You confuse me. You were gone from your family for years and they finally got you back. Why are you so unhappy here?" I just sighed. "I guess that's the problem." I shrugged. "I've been gone so long that I don't have any connection to anyone or anything here and I'm not interested in making any connections. I was forced here and everything was taken away from me. I can't even go outside without having to ask someone." "Oh, so you're saying this is a prison?" I turned around and saw Fikile with my father behind her. "That's not what I meant." Veronica looked nervous because they were angry. "I don't understand how you expect me to just be okay. You dragged me away from everything I know and made me come stay here. I don't even know you people! You don't even know me! But here you are, trying to control every aspect of my life!" Everyone came to see what the noise was about. "Nobody speaks to me like that in my own house!" He yelled and he started pulling by my arm. "What do you think you're doing?!" I tried fighting him. "I'm kicking you out! You just said you're a stranger here right?! So get out!" He pulled me harder and I slipped and fell. He didn't care. He dragged me to the door. "Baba, she pregnant!" I heard Veronica yell. "I don't care! She can go live with that man like the slut she is!" He lifted me under my arms and threw me out of the door. I flew into a tall clay pot that broke underneath me on impact. I bumped my head on the ground. "Go get that child so they both can leave!" I heard screaming and crying but I was too disoriented to get up. I heard Buhle cry and that brought me back to my senses. "If anyone of you move from this porch you better find another place to live!" I heard my father yell as I got up. "Moses is on his way. You're going home." Veronica helped me up. She had Buhle on her hip and helped me walk to the gate where a car pulled up. We got in the car and drove down the road. Moses came to get me. "Her head is bleeding. What the hell happened?" Buhle was still crying. Moses helped me me out the car and we walked around the house to a backroom. "What is this?! She can't be in my room!" Nozipho yelled. "Shut up! For once shut up and help us!" Moses yelled and helped me to sit on the bed. "Go inside and get a first aid kit. Now!" He yelled and she left. He bent down in front of me. "I don't know what happened but I didn't want to make the situation worse by taking you into the house where everyone is still visiting." I nodded. "Are you okay. Do you feel dizzy or tired?" I shook my head. "Can you see clearly?" I just nodded. "Come on Mamakhe. Let me hear your voice." I didn't want to speak because I knew me voice would come out shaky. "I can see fine." I managed to get out. "Here." Nozipho came running in with the first aid kit. "Nozipho, why don't you take Buhle out and calm her down." She just nodded and did as he said. He cleaned up the small scratch on my head. "That should do it. It's already late in the day so the clinic is closed but we'll keep an eye on you and go to the clinic first thing tomorrow morning. Ma used to be a nurse and to this day she still helps out at the clinic when she can, so you're going to be in good hands." I didn't know what to do with myself. I could hear him talking but I wasn't comprehending anything. It was like the whole world was moving and I was standing still. "Im going to go back to the house and see if I can get our things." Veronica said and I just nodded. I laid in Moses's arms until all the guests inside were gone. "How is she." Ma asked when we sat down in the living room. "More shaken up than anything else." I was given tea and I drank it. "Have you felt any cramps in you abdomen or lower back?" I just shook my head. "Okay, good. We'll keep an eye on you." We had very awkward dinner with Nozipho going on and on about how she wouldn't give her room up for me. "Nozipho! Stop it! You don't need to give up you room okay! Are you happy now?!" Ma yelled but Nozipho just rolled her eyes. After dinner Ma showed me to a room. "This is Moses's old room. You can stay here. It's quite small but it's something." I got ready for bed and Moses came to check on me. "Baba. Please stay with me tonight." The tears finally escaped my eyes. "Of course I will, Mamakhe. And if you need to talk, I'm here." He got into bed with me and I laid on his chest. "I didn't do anything wrong. I don't understand why he would hurt me." I couldn't keep in anymore I cried myself to sleep with Moses comforting me. The sun shining in my eyes woke me up. I sat up in bed and something underneath felt weird. Almost mushy. I felt a sharp pain in my lower abdomen and I knew. I just knew it was over. I threw the blankets off me and saw the blood. My blood. "No! No! No!" I cried and Moses jumped up next to me. "What?! What's happening!?" I couldn't answer. "Mamakhe?" He looked at me with wide eyes. And then called for Ma. "Let's get you to the clinic. It's going to be okay." 29 We cut the line at the clinic and Moses carried me into the doctors office. I was already hysterical before she delivered the news. My baby was gone and there was nothing I could do about it. I was given some sort of medication to deal with the pain but for the next few weeks I would have the constant reminder that I failed at the one thing I was supposed to do as a woman. Moses and I drove back in complete silence. Tears were still running down my face and I was doing everything in my power to stop myself from breaking down again. "Mamakhe? Did you hear what the doctor said? We have to go to the city tomorrow morning so you can get x-rays. You might've fractured a rib in the fall yesterday." He tried explaining to me but I didn't care. I saw Ma and Veronica come out of the house looking concerned but everything around me didn't matter. My baby was gone. I would never meet him or her. I would never feel a kick. I would never hear a cry. I would never see a smile. I was helped into the house and then into the shower. I just stood there watching the blood run down the drain while Ma tried helping me. "You'll be fine. I know you will. You're a strong woman." Ma said while dressing me. "You'll be fine." It sounded like she was trying to convince herself. She tucked me into bed and I just laid there. I couldn't move and I didn't want to. I was woken up before the sun was up. Moses helped me get ready and then we drove to the city. I guess the adrenaline from the previous day wore off because I could feel everything. The cramps in my abdomen and lower back and taking a deep breath was just unbearable. "Moses, this is too much. Let me come with you. Give me a few minutes." I held Moses's hand tightly while we waited for Ma. I didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't think I could get anymore broken than I was before but once again life proved me wrong. We got to the hospital and it seemed like they were waiting for us. I was carted off and all sorts of tests were run on me for absolutely no reason. I had a bruised rib and a miscarriage. It would take me four to six weeks to heal. I got my medication and we left. "I want to go home." I said and Moses nodded. "Okay. We'll be home in no time. Let me just text the staff." I stopped him. "No. Not to the big house. To where we lived before." He sighed. "Mamakhe. Now that you're a public figure that house isn't safe for you anymore. You need to be somewhere with security." He tried to explain but I didn't care. "I want to go home." I said again with tears in my eyes. "Moses." Ma said and he gave in. We got home and Ma prepared my bed for me. Within the first three days Nozipho already dropped Buhle off. I was grateful because Buhle was the only thing that kept me going. Ma and Moses stayed with me for the first two weeks until I convinced Ma to go back to the village and Moses went back to work. I laid Buhle down for a nap and then I heard a knock at the door. I opened it and Saw a very angry looking Sethu. "Well? Are you going to invite me in?" She asked annoyed and I opened the door wider. She stormed in and took a seat on the couch. "So, you disappeared and I had absolutely no way of reaching you. Then you pop up on the news and they're saying you're a princess. Then you get married without me and here you are again. Care to explain?" She asked annoyed. "Um, I had some issues with Moses's wife. She took Buhle. She couldn't take care of her and I had to leave abruptly to go and help. In that time Moses proposed and then my family found me and they forced me to go back home." I said and she looked skeptical but also concerned. "And the wedding I wasn't invited to?" She asked but now her voice wasn't as harsh. "Um, since we were already there and Moses had proposed our families agreed to get it over and done with." She sat back in her chair and just looked at me. "Zethu? What is going on? There is something very wrong with you. I don't know what it is but I know it's big and it has something to do with you being back here." There was silence between us and tears started forming in my eyes. "Zethu, come on. Tell me. Maybe it'll help." A tear finally escaped and rolled down my cheek. I wiped it off as fast as I could. "While I was in the village I found out that I was pregnant. That's why everything was so rushed." At first she smiled but the. She realized what I was going to say. "But I got into an altercation with my father and... And... I lost the baby." I started crying and she came over and held me in her arms. We started to get back to a new normal. Physically I was fine but mentally I was destroyed. The only thing that kept me going was Buhle. She started standing up and walking with the help of furniture. She even said her first word, Mama. Moses was distant. He went to work early and came back late. I was laying in bed waiting for him. I finally heard the door at midnight. He came straight into our room and started kissing me. "Baba, what are you doing?" I asked when he started to dress me. "I'm taking what's mine. The doctor said you were fine. It's time to get back to your marital duties." I felt guilty about so I let him continue. Just as he was about to enter me I stopped him. "What is it now?" I could hear he was annoyed. "I don't think I'm ready for a baby. Can you please use a condom?" I asked softly. "A condom? With my wife? Are you out of your mind Zethu?!" I felt my lip shiver and I knew I was going to start crying. "What if you pull out?" He sighed. "Screw this. I'm leaving." He got out of bed and I stood up with him. "Baba what do you mean? Where are you going?" I followed him and he started packing a bag. "I'm going home to my wife who won't deny me my marital rights." He got his things and made his way to the door. I was in an absolute panic. He was leaving me. "Baba, what if I go on birth control. Then you can have me all you like?" I tried reasoning with him. "Are you out of your mind? Go get back in that bed and leave me alone! I'm going home!" "Baba, please! Okay I'll do it. Please don't leave! Please Baba! You can have me! Please!" Before I knew it the door was shut in my face. "Baba!" I cried and heard his car start. He was gone. 30 From that day onwards it was just me and Buhle. It had been a month since I had seen Moses. Moses left and he never looked back. My heart was shattered. Sicelo was home for December holidays. I acted like nothing was wrong but I knew he could sense something was off. Luckily, the only thing Moses did correctly was leave me access to my credit card he gave me so we lived comfortably. Buhle was almost one and she was walking. I was so proud and thought her mother would like to see it. I sent her a video but there was no response. "Sicelo, bring all your dirty clothes and busy doing the laundry outside." I said when I came in the house. "Zethu? When is uncle Moses coming back?" I didn't expect him to ask me that. "Um, Boy-boy uncle Moses is spending the holidays with his family. Remember I told you I was his second wife?" He just nodded. "Well, he spent a lot of time with me and he didn't see his first family, so now it's their turn." He nodded. "Okay. I get it. But can't he just come visit for a few minutes and then he can go back?" I sighed and took a seat next to him. "He's a very busy man Sicelo. He works really hard so we can live comfortably and you can have nice things in school. You have to understand that when he's not here it doesn't mean he doesn't love us. It's because he loves us that he's not here." I could feel my heart shatter into a million pieces. My brother nodded and he went to get his dirty clothes. I went to my room and cried silently into a pillow until I heard Buhle wake up. I made breakfast for everyone and then got back to the laundry. After breakfast Sicelo went to play with his friends. Buhle sat on her blanket playing while I hung the clothes out on the washing line. "There she is. Makoti we've been knocking for ten minutes. But I see you're busy." It was Ma and Fikile. I greeted and hugged them. "We don't want to disturb you. We can talk while you do your thing." Ma said and i shook my head. "I just finished Ma. We can go inside." I got Buhle and her things and led them inside. I got tea and biscuits for them. And had a seat. "We're here because of the wedding. We said we'd do the last ceremony a month after the first but it's been almost three months. It's Christmas soon." I just kept quiet. "Where's Moses? He should be here for this." I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Moses is with Nozipho." They looked confused. "We just came from there. She says he's with you. So where is he? Makoti I wasn't born yesterday. I can tell that you're hiding something." I let out a deep breath. "Ma, I haven't seen Moses in over a month." She looked confused. "I don't understand. My son would never do that to you." I just bowed my head in shame. "We had a fight and he left." Ma stayed quiet. "Do you have any idea where he might be?" I asked worried. "Usually when he's upset he throws himself into his work. I'll go check his office. Meanwhile we have something to ask you. Since we've come all this way I was hoping you would let your stepmother stay here for the few days that she's in the city?" I hesitantly agreed. I prepared Sicelo's room for her and then started on lunch. I went out into the street and saw Sicelo playing soccer with a few other boys. "Sicelo! Lunch!" He came running home and we went inside. "What are we having?" He asked walking into the house. "Spaghetti." I said and he quickly ran to the kitchen where Fikile was. "Sicelo, this is Mam'Fikile. She's our father's first wife. She'll be visiting with us this week. He said a soft 'hi' and then we ate in silence. "Zethu, can I go play again?" I gave him the side eye. "And the dishes?" He just sighed. "Fine, but when I'm done?" I agreed and he washed and packed the dishes away. I laid Buhle down for an afternoon nap. "Zethu, can we talk?" Fikile asked and I just sighed. We took a seat in the living room. "How have you been after everything that's happened?" I could already tell where this was going. "I've been fine, Ma. Life goes on." She looked concerned and she just sighed. "You look fine and I know that you're a strong woman but you don't have to be all the time." She said and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "Ma, the time for this talk was two months ago when you're husband killed my unborn child. We're past the crying and being vulnerable stage. Can I just live my life peacefully please? The time for crying and talking about my feelings is over." "Zethu." She said shocked. "Fine. Can we at least talk about the wedding. We've done a lot of planning on the traditional wedding already. We've done what we can without a wedding date. We decided to leave the white wedding all to you." She said as if it was a gift. "I'm not having a white wedding." I was over it. I knew my marriage wasn't concrete and this comfortable life might not last but I was over it. "Zethu, what has gotten into you? I understand you and your husband are going through a really difficult time but you need to stick together." I just rolled my eyes. "Roll your eyes all you want. You are the wife of a very influential man. You had to have known it would come with a lot of sacrifices and hard work. If you want your marriage to work you're going to need to suck it up and go talk to your husband!" I wanted to roll my eyes again but I knew what she was saying was true. I had to speak to Moses but what he did to me really hurt. I was broken and while I was at my weakest he decided to leave me over stupid reasons. The was a panicked knock on my door in the middle of the night. "Ma, don't open it. This is not the village. We don't open doors in the middle of the night." I stopped Fikile who ran to the door. "Zethu it's me! MaRadebe!" I rushed to the door and opened it only to find her holding up a very drunk and stinky Moses. 31 We took Moses to my room and put him on the bed. He smelled disgusting. I checked on the kids in Buhle's room and they were still fast asleep. "I found him like that in his office. His assistant said he had been living there for at least two weeks now. I couldn't bring him back here sooner and risk a scandal. I had to wait for everyone to get out of the office." Ma said and I was fighting the feelings rising back up in me. I couldn't help but feel bad for him. Even a little bit guilty. "Zethu, this is your husband. You better fix it or else this might ruin his life. Your role as a wife is to make sure your husband is looked after and right now he is definitely not." I got a blanket for myself and slept on the couch. I didn't get much sleep though. My mind kept me awake. I was worried about Moses. Has he been like this the whole time! Is his health okay? Has he been eating? Has he been sleeping? How long has he been drinking like this? Was it my fault? Luckily Buhle woke up and was in the mood to play. She kept my mind distracted for a couple of hours until the sun started rising. I got myself ready for the day and started breakfast. I went old school and just made porridge. "Morning Makoti." Ma said and took a seat. "Morning Ma. Can I make you some tea?" She yawned. "I'll wait until Fikile joins us so you don't have to make it twice. How are you doing my child? You've been through a lot." I was getting really tired of that question. "I'm fine Ma. Really." She nodded and Fikile came in. They were both in their gowns. "Good morning. I haven't woken up to a house this quiet in forever." She joked. I made their tea while they spoke about the weather like it was the most interesting thing. "Mama!" Buhle cried. "I just put her down. She must've had a bad dream." I went to get her and she was very upset. "What is it baby?" She just laid her head down on my chest and cried. "I think MaRadebe and I should take the kids out today so you and Moses can talk this out." MaRadebe agreed and I was not looking forward to it. After breakfast I got the kids ready for their outing. Luckily Buhle wasn't in a bad mood. She waved goodbye and went happily. Moses slept until mid-day. I was busy making lunch when I heard him clearing his throat behind me. I turned around and looked at him standing there awkwardly. He looked horrible. His clothes were dirty and disheveled and he lacked any and all confidence. He looked like he did when I found him. "Mamakhe." He eventually broke the silence. I didn't know what to do with myself. I looked up at him and saw a tear escape his eyes. I couldn't help myself. I ran to him and hugged. We fell to our knees and he cried in my arms. "I'm sorry, Mamakhe. I'm sorry for leaving you. I don't know what was going through my mind. I'm sorry." He cried and I held him tighter. "We were both mourning the loss of our baby Baba. Neither one of us were ourselves." I wiped his tears. Seeing him like this broke my heart. "Will you forgive me?" He sounded so broken. "On one condition." He just nodded. "Anything." I smiled. "Go take a shower please." Both of us laughed. I laid out fresh clothes for him and prepared our lunch. We were eating silently. "I missed your cooking." He said putting his plate down. "How have you been Mamakhe?" I just sighed. "Everyone seems to be asking me that question lately." I said rolling my eyes. "You've been through a lot Mamakhe. We're just making sure you're okay. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you during that time." "Zethu!" Sicelo came running in the house. "Bab'Moses!" He yelled excited. They hugged and instantly started talking like I didn't exist. Ma and Fikile came in and Buhle was screaming. "She just woke up and not seeing you has her confused." Ma said handing her over. "Mama!" She cried grabbing at my top. "Okay, okay." I went to feed her while Sicelo and Moses spoke. "We went to the movies and then the arcade and then we went to eat. Also I met your other family!" Sicelo said excited. "I know them! We're in the same school! Lindi is my lab partner for science class!" He was really excited and talking way too loud but everyone just let him. I couldn't help but smile at their interaction. "You know Lindi?" Moses asked. "Yes! She stays on the other side of campus because she's a girl!" He let me know. "And I know Zenandi and Zinhle. I'm their tutor for maths!" He was way too excited and it made Buhle excited as well. She was 'talking' just as loud as he was. Since nobody ate lunch and just made a few things to go with what I had already made and served dinner. "So, I know there hasn't been a lot of time for you two to get back to normal but we have to discuss the wedding. We need a date. We'll handle everything we just need to know when." I didn't really know what to say. "I think we should do it as soon as possible. How about the week before Christmas?" My eyes went wide. "That's in two weeks baba." I said and she just nodded. "Perfect." Ma said and started typing on her phone. "Most of its sorted out we just need to send out invitations and you just need to show up." Ma and Fikile were super excited. "Also, I want my whole family under my roof for Christmas." I sat back into my seat. Was he okay? The last time Nozipho and I lived together the whole house was tense. I know she did the whole publicly accepting me as Moses's wife thing. But I didn't believe it. Something about it was off. "Baba, are you sure about that? Have you spoken to Nozipho?" I asked but before he could answer Fikile jumped in. "Nozipho, Zethu? I know you haven't grown up with us but have some respect. She's Moses's first wife. You need to humble yourself and address her respectfully. She's MaDlamini and Mamkhulu to you." What the hell was going on? She was supposed to be on my side. And there I was like a fucking baby with a lump in my throat ready to cry because I've upset my 'mommy'. "Nevermind I asked. Excuse me please. I'm going to get Buhle ready for bed." I said and got up. "Really Zethu? I was just helping. Polygamy is tricky. You need to start learning the logistics of it all." I just walked away. I was busy massaging Buhle after her bath when Moses walked in. "You okay?" I just nodded. "Mamakhe, you're a very quiet and respectful woman but when you get this quiet I know something is wrong." I just sighed. "Can we not talk about it now? I just want to get her to bed and then take a bath too." He looked concerned but nodded anyway. "Okay, I'll go get ready for bed too." He wanted to kiss me but he stopped himself and walked out. Silent tears started forming and I think Buhle could sense something was up with me because she went completely silent. It didn't take much to get her to sleep tonight because she was tired from the big day she had. Sicelo came in the room and I wiped my tears quickly. He got himself into bed and we said goodnight. I cleaned the kitchen while Moses was in the shower. "Zethu, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I just know how messy these things can get over the tiniest thing." Fikile said joining me in the kitchen. "It's fine Ma. I get it." She just sighed. "Okay, since the date is set I'm leaving first thing tomorrow morning." I was sure if she was trying to manipulate so I would feel bad about her leaving but her being here wasn't sitting well with me anyway. "Okay, Ma." I said and she just nodded. I finished in the kitchen and went to take a bath. I put on my longest pyjamas so Moses would know nothing was going to happen and joined him in bed. "Let's talk Mamakhe." 32 "What I did was stupid. I'm so sorry Mamakhe I promise I'll make up for it. Also if you don't want to have a baby now it's all up to you. So, you can go on birth control if you want to. It's up to you." I just sighed. "I'm already on birth control, Baba." He looked shocked and concerned, even a little bit angry. "The doctors prescribed it because I had been getting really bad cramps while on my period after the miscarriage." I let out a sigh of relief. I laughed a little. "What was that for?" He chuckled. "I thought you left me for another man." I just smiled. "I would never do that." He took my hand in his. "Mamakhe, tell me, why are you so hesitant about staying in the same house as Nozipho? She's accepted you as my wife." I knew it was coming. "Baba the last time we stayed together there was a lot of tension. I wasn't very comfortable with her and it was just very awkward. I didn't have the same freedoms I have here." He rubbed the back of my hand. "The last time we weren't married. Listen, I'm sure by now Nozipho has gotten over it. She doesn't care, I can tell you that for sure. Nozipho and I are just married on paper." I just looked away. "What is it Mamakhe?" I hate that he knew me so well. "Baba, I don't want to say because I don't want to sound..." I couldn't carry on. I started crying. "Come here." He said pulling me towards him. I laid on his chest and cried. "Tell me what's wrong, Mamakhe. You need to let it out otherwise it'll eat at you forever." I was mad and frustrated at myself for crying. How could I be this weak? "I understand why we're doing this but..." I could get the words out. "But it was supposed to be me and you." The tears wouldn't stop. "I know she's your wife but the thought of you being with another woman..." I covered my face in embarrassment. "Mamakhe, please, don't cry. Look at me. Look at me my love." I couldn't do it. I started doing that weird hiccup cry thing that small kids do. "It's okay. Mamakhe, I'm in love with you and I will always be. You are literally the best thing that has ever happened to me. Please believe me when I say that you've got my whole heart." He pulled me completely up on him and covered us in a blanket. Through the whole night he continued to tell me how much he loved me. The sun was already rising and we were still up. Just as I was falling asleep Buhle cried. "I'll go get her." Moses got up and the bed instantly felt colder without him. "Here she is." She almost jumped out of his arms. I fed her while she continued to complain. She fell asleep after and I got up and got changed. I put on a house dress and my apron and doek. As always I put on my wedding ring and then went to prepare breakfast for everyone. "Good morning Zethu." My brother said excitedly. "You said in the beginning of the week that we're going shopping today." I just sighed. "I'm sorry Boy-boy. I forgot. Maybe we can go some other time." His face dropped. "What's going on?" Moses said. "Zethu promised we'd go shopping in the city and now she doesn't want to." He complained and I just rolled my eyes. "Why Mamakhe? We can still go. We can make it a family trip and you can buy anything you want." Sicelo's eye went huge. "What? Anything?" Moses nodded. Just as the excitement started Fikile came in with her bags. "Morning everyone. My driver is outside so I'm heading home now." Everyone said their goodbyes and we waved as her car drove off. I was glad she was gone. I just didn't feel comfortable with anyone connected to my father. "Mamakhe, come on. Let's go shopping." I looked at him suspiciously. "You actually want to go shopping?" He nodded. "What if someone recognizes us?" He just rolled his eyes. "We'll have security on standby. Come on. Ma said she'll go with us to help with Buhle." I just sighed but nodded. I got the kids dressed in their best clothes and threw on a nude bodycon dress and out on a better doek with some heels that I bought recently. "You look beautiful." Moses said hugging me from behind. "Can I kiss you?" He asked and I blushed. I couldn't help but smile shyly and nod. He turned me around and kissed me in one swift move. I had never been kissed like that before. It felt like I was floating on air. I never want it to stop. It felt like a breath of fresh air even though I was running out of breath. "The car is here!" Ma yelled and we hesitantly pulled away. "We'll be right there!" Moses shouted back. We made sure we looked presentable and then got our things and joined the others. "Moses what the hell is this?" Three black SUV'S stood outside our yard. The while neighborhood came out to see what was going on. "We need security. Come. The middle car is ours." We all got into the car and surprisingly Moses was driving. Besides the fact that we caused a commotion wherever we went we still had fun. Moses made us buy so much stuff that we filled up both the security cars. People were kept away from us but that didn't mean they didn't take pictures. We were all watching a movie after dinner when someone banged at our door. Before Moses could open Nozipho burst in and slammed the door behind her. "So this is where you've been! With this tramp!" She yelled pulling our blanket off us. "Sicelo go to your room." He looked scared but I gave him a reassuring nod and he did as I said. "Who the hell do you think you are? I thought this shit was a phase. That he married you because your father made him do it. He left you! He left you for me! Only to come running back to your open legs!" "Nozipho! Shut up! Shut! Up! I thought you changed but you're the same old you! You will never talk to my wife like that again! Never, or I will make you pay! Do you understand me?" She just rolled your eyes. "Moses, I don't give a shit! You're publicly spending money and spoiling family number two while your children are at home wondering why they only get to see their father on a screen! With another family! I've had it with this 'situation' of yours. Come home!" "Situation? I'm a situation? The same situation that made you relevant again? You were a washed up nobody before I came along. This situation right here, is a mother to your child and wife to our husband. Two things that you clearly couldn't do. Like the news reports say, I saved your brand and your 'company'. So please, I'm telling you nicely. Get out of our house." She stood there blinking rapidly and trying to control her breath but I knew she was fuming. "This is not over. I called the press by the way. They should be here at any minute so say goodbye to you privacy." She smiled smugly and walked out the door. "Do you still think she has accepted me as your wife?" I asked Moses and he was just too shocked to answer. 33 By the next two day we couldn't even get out of our yard. The paparazzi was so bad that we had to keep all curtains closed. "Ma, I made tea." I put the tray down and sat with her. Moses was at work and he promised to spend lunch with his daughters. "I'm glad you stood up for yourself the other day." I just sighed. "Don't tell me you feel bad about it." I shook my head. "No I don't. I meant everything I said. It's just that I didn't expect her to hate me this much. It was her idea. I expected there to be a lot of tension but this, this was not what I imagined." "Makoti, I'm not going to lie to you this is going to very difficult. You and Moses are so perfect together and I would hate for someone like Nozipho to come between you two. You have to fight for your husband Makoti. Fight with everything you have." I was scared all of a sudden. This is definitely not what I imagined when I got married. We were having dinner when Moses cleared his throat. "Mamakhe, I know you don't want this but it is for the best. We have to move to the big house as soon as possible." I absolutely didn't want to leave but I knew for me to win this battle with Nozipho I needed to be everything she was not. I needed to be the perfect submissive wife. "Yebo, baba. I understand." I said with my head bowed. "I know this is sudden but the paparazzi outside is getting restless and it's only a matter of time before they do something crazy and illegal. We need to be out of here by tomorrow." What? I knew he would want us to leave but not so soon. "You pack what you can but I'll be sending staff that can have all of your things packed up in no time. It's sudden but I'm still the man of this house and I've spoken. We're moving tomorrow." I called Sethu to tell her the news. She was just excited she got to visit me in a mansion. Even though the staff would come get our things we still packed a lot of our things. Sethu would come get all the groceries tomorrow and use it for the churches soup kitchen. The next day we were escorted out by security and driven to the house. I forgot how huge it was. It took us forever just to drive up the driveway. Sicelo's jaw fell was on the floor. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. We went inside and Nozipho and her girls were waiting for us. Nozipho looked bored and the girls looked nervous. "I'm so glad this moment has come. Girls remember I told you I have another wife but mommy is also still my wife?" They just nodded. "This is MaZulu, my second wife. MaZulu, this is Lindiswa my eldest daughter, but we all call her Lindi. These are the twins Zinhle and Zenande." Moses introduced us. "Hi, it's nice to meet you." I said and was met with silence. "Girls you know Sicelo." They nodded. "Let me show you your rooms." We followed Moses upstairs. "This is your room Sicelo. I had them decorate it." We walked into the room that was big enough to be someone's house. It was awesome. His bed was huge and it was decorated in all things boy and all things rugby. He even had a desk with a computer and a laptop. There was a tv that came out of the wall and a fully stocked closet. He couldn't believe it. We left him alone to take it all in. "Come with me. I had your room done too." I followed him to my room and I loved it. I could live here and never leave. Everything was accessable. I had a huge bathroom and a huge walk in closet. The closet was a big as a clothing store. "Thank you, Baba." I said and kissed him. "Do you like it?" He asked and I smiled. "I love it." I said and kissed him again. "Before I forget, I want to have a meeting with you and MaDlamini. Let's go downstairs." I bowed my head and followed him. "MaDlamini, let's talk." She rolled her eyes but followed us. "Tell Gloria to bring us tea." Nozipho started typing and we took a seat outside by the pool. "I called this meeting to talk about our living arrangements and how we'll move forward from this and build a more unified home." Baba said and Gloria, the maid brought us tea. "Thank you." I said and a big smile formed on her face. "MaDlamini, you are the one who suggested polygamy. Why are you now acting like we forced your hand at this?" She sat back in her seat and sighed while glaring at me. "Moses, you're taking me for a fool. You're really taking me for a fool. Our agreement was that you'll marry MaZulu and we'll work on our marriage. Now, you're not even married yet and you put her needs before mine. I'm the first wife here. I'm the senior wife, the matriarch. My life and the time you spend with me should not be dictated by a second wife. We haven't even once went to a marriage councilor or even just spoke about our issues. I agreed to a second wife on the grounds that we will stay married and work on our relationship." I could tell she was very upset and she was trying to keep it together. I felt a tinge of guilt but I was trying to ignore it. "Yes, MaDlamini I did agree to that and I do still want to carry out our agreement. You also have to understand that my wife and I went through a very difficult couple of months." She scoffed. "Your wife? You have a wife? Really?" I was extremely confused and offended. "Yes he has a wife. What do you mean?" She looked surprised. "Oh? Really? You're his wife?" She asked condescendingly. "Yes I'm his wife. Lobola has been paid in full. I'm his wife whether you like it or not." She scoffed. "I have one question for you little girl. Have the two of you completed all the marriage rites?" This bitch. She looked at me smiling. "Answer me. Have you two completed all the marriage rites? Have you signed any papers?" I just sighed. "I'll take that as a no. So, you don't actually have a say here. You should be humbling yourself but here you are, a child, trying to take over my marriage. You come into my marriage, open your legs for my husband, serve him like a slave, say 'Yebo Baba' to all his bullshit and all of a sudden you're Makoti of the year. After I've endured fourteen years of torture from him and his family. But, you know what? It's fine. Because as soon as you stop playing to the tune of their song you'll become absolutely nothing to them as well. Just watch. I give it a year until their done with you too." 34 "Nozipho was that necessary?" Moses asked and I could see by his body language that he was going back to that weak man who who I had to carry home from the restaurant when we first met. "What do you mean? She's soon to be my sister wife. I need to warn her about these things. But let's get back to business. Living arrangements." I could see by the smile on her face she thought she had won. She did but I was going to kill her with kindness. "Seeing as though we are now living in the same house I suggest we work out a sleeping schedule. For now, up until the two of you get married Moses will be spending nights in my room." She stopped and I just knew she was looking for a reaction from me. "It's only right." She added but I kept quiet and tried controlling my facial expressions as much as possible. "Does everyone agree?" Moses cleared his throat but I spoke before he could even say anything. "Yebo, Mamkhulu." She looked confused. "What did you call me?" She asked shocked. "Mamkhulu." I said 'nervously'. "That is how the first wife is normally addressed. Would you like to be called something else?" She blinked rapidly. "No. Umm. That's fine." "Mamkhulu, I would also like to apologize for my outburst the other day. I was not myself and I understand now why you did what you did. I hope that arrangements and your relationship with Baba gets better now that we live in the same house and he can spend his time equally between us." She looked pissed off. "I'm not normally the type to fight. I understand my role in this house. And as you mentioned before, I will humble myself and not step on your toes as the first wife. That was not my intention so I'm sorry if I ever made you feel that way." She looked shocked. "MaDlamini do you accept MaZulu's apology?" Baba asked proudly. "Yes." Was all she said and I smiled to myself. "Mamkhulu I was hoping that I can cook for you and the family. Is that okay with you?" She glared at me. "No. I promised the kids burgers. Gloria will be making that for dinner." My face fell. I thought she would say yes. "MaDlamini, tell Gloria not to count me in with the burgers. MaZulu please make me something fit for a Zulu man with two beautiful wives. Is it too late in the day for you to start making me a seven colours meal." I smiled shyly with my head bowed. "It's not too late Baba. I'll make it for you." Nozipho scoffed and rolled her eyes. I made Baba's dinner while entertaining Buhle. The girls kept walking past the kitchen to see what I was doing and I acted like I didn't see them. Luckily it was still early in the day so I could make some steamed bread or dumplings. I made a lamb stew with some yellow rice, fried chicken, potato salad, pumpkin, spinach, some steamed vegetables with cheese, bean salad, coleslaw, cabbage, and I found some beetroot in the fridge. I finished and dished just in time for dinner. I got my water bowl and hand towel and went to the dining room where the kids were already enjoying their burgers that Gloria had made for them. "There you are, Mamakhe. The aroma coming from the kitchen is making my mouth water." He was his hands and I brought him his plate. "Wow, you made all of this? I can't believe it. Thank you Mamakhe." I got myself a burger and took a seat. All the kids were looking at his plate with big eye. Their mouths hung open and I could tell they really wanted some. "You're not having some?" He asked rolling up his sleeves. "I was looking forward to the burger. Why?" I asked taking a bite of a fry. "What if you poisoned it? Why wouldn't you eat your own food?" Nozipho asked rudely. "Why would I do that? This is ridiculous. Baba can I have a bite?" I asked and he scooped some food onto his fork and fed me. It just ended up aggravating Nozipho more. "Baba, can I get some too?" One if the twins asked. "Me too please?" The other one added. "I did make more than enough. I can go dish up for you if you'd like." I offered but Nozipho interrupted. "No! They asked for burgers and they're going to eat it!" She yelled and the first twin started crying. The second one joined soon after. "What's going on in here?" MaRadebe came rushing in. "None of your business." Nozipho made the girls finish their food and I couldn't help but feel sorry for them. That night I got myself and Buhle ready for bed. I knew Moses wasn't going to be spending the night in my room but I still put on a plane red bra and thong set with a red silk robe. Buhle was full of energy so we were playing on my bed. "How are my girls? I just came to say goodnight." She squealed when she saw her father. "Hi baby." He jumped on the bed and kissed her all over. She laughed and squealed but eventually crawled out from under her father and sat in my lap. "Today was a long day, Mamakhe. How are you feeling?" I sighed and Buhle pulled down my top so I fed her. "I'm fine Baba. I think it's going to take MaDlamini a while to get used to me but as long as I'm with you, I'm happy." He sat next to me and gave me a kiss. "I'm so lucky to have you. I'm so proud of you after today." I looked at him confused. "You handle the situation with Nozipho far better than I ever could. You're the wife every Zulu man wishes for." I smiled shyly and I could feel my face getting hot. "Thank you, Baba. I can't wait for us to officially be husband and wife." I said and we started kissing but Buhle started crying. She pushed Moses's face away from mine. "Little girl. What do you think you're doing?" He asked playfully and she shouted at him in her baby talk. "Oh, you think You're clever. Take what's mine and I take what's yours." He said and made as if he was drinking her milk. She started crying. "Oh, nana. What did he do, huh?" She cried pointing at him. "I'm sorry baby." He kissed her but she was still mad. "Naughty. Baba is naughty." I made as if I was hitting his hand and he started 'crying'. Her crying stopped and she got into his lap and started 'shouting' at me. "Hey! I was trying to help you." She just continued 'arguing' with me until she remembered that I was the source of her food. 35 Buhle and I were up early the next morning. She was having her breakfast when I got a text notifications. 'Hi Zethu. It's Fikile here. Your father asked me to let you know that you have to be here in the village tomorrow morning. We have to do a cleansing ceremony for the loss of your baby before you get married next week.' There was no way I was doing that. I knew it was really early but I went upstairs to find ma anyway. She would know what to do. I knocked on her door and luckily she was already awake. "oh, something's wrong. I can see it on your face. Is it Nozipho?" I shook my head and gave her the phone. "This isn't right. They have no right to perform this ceremony. Lobola and damages were paid. You and the child belong to us. We should be doing this ceremony. I'm glad you showed me this. I'll contact the elders and we'll get this sorted out. Don't worry about it my child." Like with everything else recently I let her take care of it. I just needed to get married to Moses so Nozipho could stop rubbing the fact that I'm not officially married to him in my face. "Oh, you're awake." Nozipho said when she got into the kitchen. "Yes, good morning. I was hoping I could make breakfast?" She sighed. "You want to play housewife so bad." She said shaking her head. "MaDlamini, I'm trying here. I love cooking and cleaning. I can't help it. It's how I show love and appreciation. I promise I'm not trying to step on your toes. As much as I am here for Baba, I can still be an asset for you too. Your a business woman. Now that I'm her you can focus on your business and I can focus on life at home." She scoffed. "Oh, you want to take over my house?" All I could do was sigh. "No disrespect, but are you misunderstanding me on purpose? Please, believe me when I say I'm not here to compete with you. I'm trying to make life easier for you." She just stood there tapping her foot on the ground. "I promise I don't want to take over. I'm just trying to build and uplift the family. You and Baba both need a support system and I'm here to be that support system." She stayed silent but finally rolled her eyes. "Whatever. All this just so you can cook? Dumbest thing I've ever seen. Fine. Make the breakfast. I don't give a damn. Just don't make any of your ghetto village food." She rolled her eyes and walked away. I started preparing a feast. The table was set and full of food by the time everyone came down for breakfast. "You made this?" Sicelo asked and I nodded. He took a seat with wide eyes and we all sat down to eat. We listened to the kids stories about school and it almost seemed like we were an actual family. "I am on my way to the village. I spoke to Moses about the message you showed me. I sent his his uncle's to your family this morning. I do believe we need the cleansing ceremony but let's sort this out and I'll tell you when to come. Luckily, wedding plans are in order and the two of you will officially be married in a weeks time." After breakfast Nozipho left for work and the kids had a pool day planned. The nannies came in and baba introduced them to me. Buhle went down for her morning nap and I was sitting in my room. I was looking at my old wig. I wanted to put it on but I knew I wouldn't be able to do it properly. "You know you can pay people to do that right?" Baba said coming into my room. "Its okay. I can figure it out." He sighed. "Mamakhe, you're rich now. Please, take advantage of my money. You do everything for me and I don't do much for you. Please, enjoy the lifestyle. I am literally begging you to spend my money here. What's the problem?" He asked and placed a kiss on my cheek. I sighed before I answered. "I don't want to be accused of anything. You know how MaDlamini is." He kissed me. "Stop worrying about MaDlamini. How about I get you a stylist, and a hair dresser, oh and let's book you a massage." He started typing on his phone. "I'm texting my assistant. He's good at these things." I just chuckled. "You deserve to be spoiled. And I feel bad that I haven't been spoiling you." I kissed him. "Do you want to spoil me?" I asked in between kisses and he nodded. "Then spoil me." He picked me up and carried me to the bed where we made love. I was laying on his chest listening to his heart beat. "I've missed half of the day. I need to get going Mamakhe." I groaned. "I know, but your hairstylist will be here in about twenty minutes. You need to get up too. I just sighed and kissed him. "Fine." I got out of bed completely naked. "Mamakhe." He complained. "Mm?" I asked innocently. "You know what you're doing you little tease." I giggled and we got into the shower together. I got my hair and nails done. I have has long hair in a while and I loved it. I got my whole body waxed and massaged. I had never felt so relaxed in my life. "Sisi?" One of the twins peeped into the kitchen where I was busy preparing dinner. "Yes?" I asked and she looked really shy. "You're beautiful." She said and ran away before I could say anything. I struggled getting my face back to normal because I was smiling so hard. The kids dominated dinner with their conversation. Even Sicelo was talking a lot. That's how I knew he was happy and that made me happy. After dinner they played with Buhle and she was having the time of her life being the centre of attention. "MaZulu! MaDlamini!" Baba called and we went into his office. "Ma just called and we leave tomorrow so we can do the cleansing ceremony on Monday. Then we'll stay there the whole week until the wedding." He said and I just nodded. "I'm not going to you're wedding. I already publicly welcomed MaZulu into the family. I'm not going through that charade again." I was not surprised at her reaction. "MaDlamini, I'm going to be honest with you about this. I don't care if you're not at the wedding but you have to be at the cleansing ceremony. The whole family needs to be there. We do not have time to waste. Go pack yours and the kids belongings so we can get on the road. I don't care if you are at the wedding but the kids are definitely going to be there." 36 The drive for me was weird because MaDlamini insisted baba drive with her and I really wanted him to drive with us. I had to explain to Sicelo that he would see his dad and brothers and he wasn't happy about it at all. He put his earphones in and ignored me the whole trip. I felt bad for springing this on him when he wasn't ready but I knew I had to protect him. We got to the Gumede homestead and the girls jumped out of the car and immediately started playing. Sicelo was clinging onto me like never before. Baba and MaDlamini walked our way. "What's wrong my boy?" Moses asked bending down to his level. Sicelo just stayed quiet. "It's okay. You don't have to talk about it." A group of boys came to fetch our luggage and we went inside and Sicelo wouldn't let me go. The girls somehow convinced Sicelo to go play while we had a meeting. MaDlamini and I sat at Moses's feet on grass mats listening to the elders. "I've never gotten a cleansing ceremony organized so quickly. It's unheard of but I fully understand why it needs to be done. We are very eager to have you as part of our family. So we want to finish the marriage rites so nobody can dispute it or throw it in your face." I saw MaDlamini roll her eyes "Don't worry about it though. We have everything sorted and the cleansing will take place tomorrow." Tomorrow? That's fast. The very next day Moses and I did the cleansing ceremony. It was successful and I was just glad we could move on from this. "Sicelo! Lunch is ready! Call the others." All though one of the other Makoti's from Moses's cousin did the cooking for the family, I was assigned the role of cooking for the kids. Their table was set up outside and I had already dished for them and let their food cool down. They all sat down to eat and I went inside to check on Buhle. I got the usual glares from all the other wives of Moses's cousins. I ignored it and went to find Buhle. She was laying in bed awake. "Hi baby. Did you have a nice nap?" She giggled and stretched her hands out to me. "Makoti! MaZulu!" I made my way to where I heard Ma's voice. "Ma?" I found her in the kitchen with the other ladies. "The kettle has broken. Please start a fire and boil water to make sure there's tea for after lunch." She said and I was getting weird looks. I had a suspicion I was being tested. "Okay ma, I'll go start the fire." I tied Buhle to my back with her blanket and started the fire. I didn't want to go back into the full house and ask for water so I just went to the tap up the road while I waited for the wood to burn. I used the huge pot so there would be enough for everyone and started preparing my cups and teapots. I prepared my trays and waited for the water. I fed Buhle while I was waiting and afterwards served tea like it took zero effort. The 'cousins' seemed to hate me even more after that. They stood in a group outside watching me gather dishes to wash outside. "MaZulu, these bitches didn't dish for me and all the food is apparently finished. Is there still some of the food left that you made for the kids?" MaDlamini asked and it was the first time she spoke to me since we got here. "Yes, I'll make you a plate." She followed me inside and I dished her some food. "There's still some salad left from the lunch. Do you want some of that?" I said looking in the fridge for some juice. "No thank you! I might choke!" She said loudly and my eyes went wide. "What? They already hate me." I took out the juice and the microwave went off. "Here's the juice. Let me get your food." I got her food and cutlery and put it down in front of her. "I don't think they like me either." I said softly looking down at my hands. "They don't. Its because you're marrying Moses. Moses's money controls this family and they didn't know that before they married their deadbeat husband's. They heard Gumede and ran down the isle without knowing they'd be broke." "MaDlamini." I said in shock. "What? It's true. You need to start growing a thicker skin. These bitches are probably out to get you." I left her to eat and went to finish the dishes. I heard a big commotion in the house. "Here she is. I'm starting dinner now and since you're cooking for the kids you'll have to cook outside. The kitchen isn't big enough for the both of us." One of the ladies that's in charge of cooking for the family said. "I don't know who you think you are but this is my house, MaZulu is my daughter-in-law, and she will cook in my kitchen." MaRadebe jumped in. "It's fine, Ma. I'll cook outside." I said softly. "Thank you! At least she has some sense." I almost rolled my eyes. Luckily I left the fire going early. I got outside and the fire was out and all the wood was wet. I couldn't believe it. MaDlamini was right. These bitches were out to get me. "Mamakhe?" I was going through the pile of wood to see if there wasn't at least a few that were dry and before I even realized I was crying. "Mamakhe?" I wiped my tears and stood up. "Is everything okay?" Moses asked and I nodded. "Then why are you crying? Don't lie to me." I let out a sigh and shook my head. "I'm fine. I just need to go gather some more wood." He took my hand in his. "How can I help?" I shook my head. "I'm fine. I'll do it myself." He looked extremely worried and I just started walking to where I could get wood. The kids ate late but luckily Moses brought them some snacks from his trip to the city today. I was sitting on my bed after I cleaned up with tears running down my face. I couldn't get a break. "Moses! What the hell!?" Baba stormed into my room pulling MaDlamini by her arm. "I told you it wasn't me!" She yelled and I wiped my tears away. "I felt the wood. It was wet. Why would it be wet if it didn't rain!?" Baba asked and MaDlamini rolled her eyes. "It wasn't her." I said and Moses scoffed. "Don't try and defend her." I shook my head. "I'm not. She was in the room with me and the other ladies before it happened. I don't know who it was but it wasn't MaDlamini." "Thank you! Can I go now!?" He just nodded. "Mamakhe what's going on?" He asked softly and bent down in front of me. "I'm just tired." I said and he came to sit next to me. He held me and I couldn't help but cry. "I hate seeing you unhappy. We are getting married this weekend. This should be the happiest time of your life." There was a knock on our door. "It's me. I'm coming in." I heard the door open and close. "What's going on? What did Nozipho do this time?" The room went silent but I just stayed in Moses's arms. "Ma, I don't understand why you're allowing those woman to take over. Nozipho and Zethu are your daughters but they're being treated like crap in their own home. "Moses what are you talking about?" She asked and he started rubbing my back. "They're overworking her and on top of that they're sabotaging her tasks. Not once have I seen her sit down to rest today. I'm not even sure if she ate. MaDlamini is hiding out in her room and they refuse to give her food. The only food she got today was from MaZulu this afternoon." "Moses? Are you serious?" He just sighed. "I'm afraid so. Tomorrow, I'm taking MaDlamini home. She needs to get back to work. MaZulu will come with us. We'll go grocery shopping for the rest of the week and she needs a break from those women." "Oh, I'm so sorry. I'll sort this out tomorrow. I'll go make some tea and warm food for the two of them." I washed my face and straightened out my apron when she left. Moses came up behind me and held me. "Don't look so worried." I said looking at him in the mirror. "How could I not be. My mother is supposed to be looking out for the two of you when I'm not here. I left for half a day only to come back and find you misserable." I kissed his cheek. "We'll be fine, Baba. I just needed a good cry." He held me tighter. "I love you, Mamakhe." "I love you too, Baba." 37 The next morning we were off to the city. I could finally dress nicely. I would be seen in public with Baba today so I did my hair and makeup. I dressed a nude long sleeve bodycon dress and a pair of redbottom heels. I still wanted to look like a zulu wife so I wrapped a doek around my head but I still had my hair out. And like I would do at home put a scarf around me like a sash but because we had to keep up appearances I used a Hermes scarf. It was early but the wives were already up preparing for the day. I walked into the kitchen and all eyes were on me. "Morning everyone. Ma, here's Buhle's milk. That should be enough for the day otherwise you'll have to try the formula." "Oh my god! Look at you!" I turned around to see Veronica. "You look like the stylish rich makoti that you are!" I hugged her. "Where have you been?!" I asked and she just rolled her eyes. "You know how your father is." Both of us rolled our eyes. "You look absolutely beautiful." I smiled and thanked her. The drive to the city was filled with silence. At least it wasn't awkward silence. We dropped MaDlamini at home and got some extra clothes for Moses and then went grocery shopping. People kept staring at us. They even took pictures of us. They tried to hide it but we saw and it didn't help that we bought heaps of food. "What do you want to do?" He asked when we finally got into the car. "I just want to spend time with you. Why don't we go to a drive through and get some junk food and sit in the car and enjoy ourselves." A big smile formed on his face. "I like that idea." We got food and ate it in the car. We laughed and spoke about random things. I had the time of my life. We were finally just being us like we were when I lived in the shack. We had to get back though but the drive there was filled with pure happiness from the both of us. "Well, were here. I don't want to leave this car." Moses sat back in his seat and sighed. "We have to Baba. The groceries need to get inside. It was a long drive." He just groaned and there was a knock at his window. "Come on, the sun is setting. Open the boot so the kids can get the groceries." MaRadebe said. Moses got out and opened my door for me. The boot was opened and all the kids helped carry the groceries inside. We got inside and it seemed like they already finished dinner. "Mama!" Buhle cried when she saw me. "Wow! Just like that I'm rejected by someone who hasn't even been on earth for a year." Veronica joked while handing her over. "Hi baby. Did you have fun today?" She just squealed and threw her tiny arms around me. "I know you just got home but we need to talk." Seriously? Really? I didn't even get a chance to sit. I kind of knew what was coming. I just sighed. I seemed to be doing a lot of that lately. "What is it now?" Moses asked. "MaZulu! MaZulu!" The girls came running up to me. "Can we please stay in mommies room tonight?" One of the twins asked softly. "I don't know baby. Wait, here's my phone. Message her. I want to see what she says. I'll be out back." I handed them my phone and they were extremely excited. We walked out because I didn't want to be around the other ladies when Veronica tells me what my family wants from me. "So, the chief and the rest of the family wants you to come home. He says he's been lenient enough and that you need to come home so the ceremony can be done properly." My whole body went stiff. I knew exactly what she was going to say but it still out me in shock. "That man is not being lenient. He just felt guilty." Baba held onto my hand. "But I do understand. I'll sleep here tonight and tomorrow I'll make my way there. I'm spending the least amount of time possible in that house. I just need to have a talk with my brother." She nodded. "MaZulu, mommy said yes." One of the twins showed me the message. Nozipho even asked me to take care of them this weekend. I really think she's coming around to the idea of me. "Okay baby, go fetch your stuff from the big room inside and I'll unlock it for you." She ran inside to tell her sisters the news. "You gave them your phone? Really?" I nodded and when I went back to my home screen I saw that my wallpaper was changed. "Look at this." It was a picture of the girls and Sicelo pulling crazy faces. "I knew it." I spent some time with the kids and then I had to have the dreded talk with Sicelo. "Baba, will you please stay with me?" I asked before I called my brother and he agreed. "Sicelo, come here Boy-boy." He was such a good kid. I hated disappointing him or making him unhappy. We've had enough of that. "I know you don't want to, but we have to Boy-boy. Tomorrow night we have to go to the royal house where you will meet the chief and all your brother's." He pulled his hand out of mine. "I promise it will only be one night." His eyes got glossy. "Zethu please. I can stay here. I like it here. Please Zethu. Please." My own tears started falling. "Boy-boy, you don't have to be scared. I'll be with you the entire time." I promised but the. He started crying. "Zethu please! Please!" He hugged me tightly. "If you let me stay here I promise I'll be good. Please Zethu! I don't want them to take me! Please! Don't let them take me." I held onto him. "They're not going to take you. I promise you." He cried harder. "But what if they do! Zethu, why are you doing this to me!" He pushed me away and stood there crying. "What's going on here?" Ma came in. "Zethu wants to send me to the chief!" He cried and Ma hugged him. "Sicelo that's not what I want to do, I swear. It's just one night and your going to have to see them at the wedding anyway. I'll be there the entire time." He continued crying. I had no idea what to do. "Makoti, I know this is a difficult situation, but this is happening really fast. How about you let him stay with us. He'll meet his father briefly at the wedding and they can meet properly at another stage. Just for this weekend to go smoothly." I agreed and she left with him. "Mamakhe, are you okay?" I wiped my tears and took a deep breath. "I don't know. It seems like everything is happening at the same time and it's just too much." I turned around and he put his arms around me. Luckily I got to spend the night with Moses because Nozipho went back home. I was getting ready to leave for the night when Moses took a seat on the bed. "By this time tomorrow we'll be married and celebrating." I took a seat next to him. "I know. I can't wait. Do you think the kids will be okay?" I asked him and he placed a kiss on my cheek. "The kids will be fine, Veronica has agreed to look after them for the weekend." We said our goodbyes and I was escorted to my father's house. I was met by Fikile. "You're here! Thank God. We have everything set up for your hair and nails and then you'll have to fit your traditional attire." The house was extremely busy and my father was nowhere to be seen. I didn't do much to my hair and nails. The clothes fit perfectly and I made my way to bed early. I didn't sleep much because of all the commotion happening downstairs but I just want to be alone. The ceremony started early with me wrapped in a blanket and leaving my home. I wasn't allowed to look back as my father shouted out clans praises signalling to the ancestors that I was leaving the family to join another. There was singing and dancing. The wedding was outside under a huge white Marquee. I didn't understand where all the people came from but there seemed to be hundreds of people around me. I was really grateful that I had nothing to do with the planning. My role was to sit on a grass mat and not talk or look at anyone. A cow and a goat was slaughtered and the traditional gift exchange happened. My family had to gift the members of Moses family with gifts. Speeches were given by my father. Moses's father wasn't alive anymore so his eldest uncle had a few words to say. Once everyone got their gifts it was Moses turn. I got up and made a path with grass mats to a bed that was maid up. Moses followed the grass mats and sat down. I washed his feet and and tucked him into bed. The bridesmaids, that I had no idea who they were, then took sticks and and hit him. I was not sure why this was done but it was part of the ceremony. We were officially married and there was a lot more dancing and singing the food was in abundance and everyone was having a good time. We took photos and I was glad to see the kids having the time of their lives. "We are now officially married." Moses said and my smile was so wide I thought I would break my face. "I love you Mrs Gumede." "I love you too Mr Gumede." 38 We spent our wedding night at my families BnB in the village. The party was still carrying on and we could hear the drums from a distances as we made love. It was the most romantic thing I had ever experienced in my life. The next morning we had breakfast and made love some more before we got dressed. I got dressed in my traditional attire and the drums started back up and they got louder and louder. It was Moses's family who came to get us and walk us back to the house. I spent time in the presence of the older women. I sat on the the middle of the floor and they sat around the room. "This might sound cliche but it's true. A wife holds the sharp end of the blade. No matter what happens, stand by your husband. Keep your family together and grow your family. I'm sure your mother is excited for more grandchildren. Especially children of royal blood." Wait what? All of this was so weird. Before I could even process what was said another woman started talking. "You have to make sure that your husband is not looking elsewhere for satisfaction. Don't be like these modern women who weaponise sex. This is what you've signed up for. Make sure you're always ready to satisfy your husband. If you do your job as a wife correctly he won't want or lust for other women." My brain was scrambling. "You are now in a polygamist marriage. We all know how your sister wife can get. We've already had a talk with her but all she's asking for is for you to respect her as the matriarch and she won't have any issues. You are here to build and uplift this family. They've been through a lot but I believe you'll be able to get them through it. So what ever you do, remember that you need to support and uplift your sister wife at all times. Show a united front and you'll live happily." The advice went on for hours. My body was sore from sitting in the same position the whole day. I was eventually let go and I could be with Buhle and the rest of the kids. I was glad to see my brother smiling again. "Mamakhe, my mother wants to speak to us." We sat outside at the table next to my room. "So, you're officially married now. Congratulations." I just smiled and thanked her. "I'm not sure if you remember but we spoke about you staying with me after the wedding. It's our culture and I would love for us to do that because I didn't have it with Nozipho." She said and all I could think of was being away from Moses but I also wanted to do things right. "I would love to fullfil my Makoti duties Ma but I'll have to consult Baba." I said like the perfect Zulu wife I was. "I don't see an issue with it besides for the fact that I really want my family together for Christmas and I don't think MaDlamini would want to stay here. Shes always very busy this time of year with her big Christmas party she throws every year." MaRadebe sighed. "Why do we always have to go according to Nozipho's schedule this time of year Moses. You have two wives now. There has to be some sort of compromise we can get to here." I just sat quietly. "Let me sit and discuss it with both of my wives ma and then I'll get back to you." She just gave him the side eye and kept quiet. That night I served Moses his dinner and made sure the kids were okay before I went to bed to my husband. I couldn't believe he was my husband. The next day people started leaving all throughout the day. I was really happy because dealing with Moses' cousins' wives was a lot to handle. "Makoti, here you go. I bought all of these specially for you." Ma came out of her room with a huge pile of shweshwe skirts and dresses with matching aprons and doeks. This is what you will wear when you are here with me. I know in the city it's a bit different but these are the clothes wives wear at home." I thanked her and got to making dinner. I just heated some of the leftovers from the wedding. "Are the three of you going to sleep in in your room tonight? Everyone has gone?" MaRadebe asked the kids. "Gogo, have you seen how the big room looks? They left it in a complete mess." Lindi complained. "But if you sleep outside in your mother's room again I'll be alone in the house." Ma tried guilt tripping them. "I'll clean the room quickly before bed." I cleaned the kids room, that everyone else left a mess. The room was quite big but I understand why they didn't want to share the room with the others. It looked like a hurricane came through there. "Okay, I just picked some of the stuff up from the floor and made the beds. I'll clean it properly tomorrow." I told them and they were happy to sleep in their room. There was a knock on our door before the sun was even up. "Makoti! Time to get up!" Moses and I both groaned. "What's the time?" He asked reaching for his phone. "Makoti! Makoti did you hear me!?" I sat up in bed and rubbed my eyes. "Makoti!" I rolled my eyes. "Yebo, ma!" I got out of bed and walked to my suitcase. "Good. Get ready for the day and join me outside!" "It's three in the morning. What could she need you for at three in the morning? This is ridiculous." I went over to him and kissed him. "Its fine, Baba." He just groaned but went back to sleep anyway. "Morning Makoti." "Morning Ma." "We need firewood and a lot of it. We're having guests for lunch and you'll need to cook for them." She walked with me because it was dark and I gathered firewood. "You'll be making tripe and steamed bread for about twenty people. They're all coming to see Moses's new wife. You." She said cheerfully and walked into the house. Twenty people?! TWENTY PEOPLE!!!! Why? Didn't everyone who needed to see me see me at the wedding? I didn't want to complain out loud because I should've expected this. This is what they do to their sons' wives. I started the fire because tripe took hours to cook. I cleaned the tripe once I got the fire going. Luckily the sunrise was beautiful. "Makoti, the kids will be awake anytime now. Come make breakfast and some tea. You can use the inside kitchen." Was she serious? "Yebo, ma." I answered politely. Luckily my tripe was cleaned and I threw it in my pot and went inside. "Makoti, please also make sure the house is clean. You know how some visitors are. After breakfast please start sweeping the driveway. People must see you so they know you're a good wife." I wasn't even in the house properly yet. This was going to drive me crazy. I fixed breakfast quickly. Made a pot of tea and coffee. I would be needing the coffee. I went to sweep the driveway and it seemed like everyone came to see. People kept walking past the house slowly and I knew it was to see me. I checked on my pots outside and then kneeded the dough for the bread. Throughout the day I tried working really fast and as I was finishing up the house the first guests started arrived. I checked my pots and everything was perfect so I put on the kettle for tea. I was serving tea and food the whole day while also looking after Buhle and the rest of the kids. Everyone was complimenting MaRadebe on what a good Makoti she had. I was doing the damn work. + At the end of the day I was exhausted and Moses was frustrated. This is not how I imagined the week after my wedding going. 39 I was woken up by ma the next day. Still early but at least this time the sun was up. I was cleaning the kids room when ma came to get me. "Your sisterwife just arrived and we are expecting guests. Come get ready to serve tea. They're almost here." I walked out of the room and saw Baba giving MaDlamini a foot massage. It was going to take me a while to get used to this. "Oh, MaZulu it's good to see you." What did she just say? Who was this imposter? This is not the Nozipho I know. "Mnakwethu, will you please bring me a tall glass of cold water. The heat is killing me today." I was too confused to question anything I just got her the glass of water. "Come sit we need to discuss my Christmas party." Party? I haven't been to one of those in a while. Well, except for my wedding. I'm sure this one will be an experience. Partying with the A list of South Africa would probably be one of the highlights of my life. "There's not much to say. Everything is sorted. I have an amazing team this year. Ma and Moses I have your outfits ready. So don't worry about it. The theme is year is black and gold. I'm extremely excited." I was too. I wondered what I was going to wear and if she had something planned for me as well. I was so excited I could scream. "MaZulu, I have a big favour to ask you." Oh my god. Okay. Calm down. Straight face. "Yebo, Mamkhulu." I was so excited but I knew I couldn't show it. "I was hoping you could help me with the kids. They hate going to this party and they requested to stay here. Will you please stay with them?" What? "Of course." I answered excitedly. I was so used to lying that it came naturally. "Oh, thank you so much." "I'm so glad to see Moses's wives getting along. I'm so proud of the two of you for putting your differences aside and making the family work. We have more we need to discuss but our guests have arrived." Ma went outside to the grey pickup truck. A man and woman got out and she hugged them. "Oh no." MaDlamini said and Moses stormed out of the house. MaDlamini ran after him and I followed. I saw Moses throw a punch and started running to them. We all held him back. "Moses! Stop this! Stop! We need to sit and talk this out! Stop it!" Ma yelled. "Uncle Noah!" The girls screamed and ran. Uncle Noah? Oh no. This was Moses's brother. The girls ran up and hugged him. "Moses, I know a lot is going on right now but you will not scare my children. You promised me non of this will affect them. You promised." Nozipho said under her breath and Moses seemed to stop fighting against us to get to his brother. "Thank you." She let out a shaky breath and went back inside. "Moses, can we all go inside please. Come on." I could tell he was still furious but he complied so we all walked back in the house. They sat there awkwardly while I made tea. "Zethu, can we turn on the sprinkler, please. It's hot. We're dying." My brother begged. "You are not dying Sicelo. I'll take you guys down to the river tomorrow." He sulked and went to deliver the news to the others. "Why are you here?" Moses broke the silence. "Well, my baby brother got married and I wasn't invited." Was he serious? He couldn't be serious. He slept with his brother's wife and he wants to know why he wasn't invited to the wedding. "Why? Do you want to sleep with her too?" I almost tripped with my tray of tea. I took a seat on the grass mat next to Moses. "I didn't come here to fight but we need to fix this between us. I need my brother back if we can just talk this through." "Okay, that's it!" Nozipho interrupted. "Yes we need to talk this through but I am sick and tired of this family sabotaging my success with their drama. I'm about to host the biggest event of the year in two days! Now is not the time! I refuse to give up more than I already have for this family! I'm done putting up with it and I'm done sacrificing. I'm done! Ma, Moses I'm leaving. If you don't show up tomorrow you'll regret it. And you!" She pointed at Noah. "You can discuss whatever it is you want to discuss after my event. I'm sick of all of you. Just as we reached some level of normalcy obviously something has to come ruin it! Bye! I'm leaving!" Ma told Noah and his wife that it was best if they left so they did. I went to go knock on MaDlamini's door. "Leave me alone, Ma. I'm not changing my mind." She said and I knocked again and announced myself. "It's Zethu." "Oh, come in." I was shocked she was actually letting me inside. "Would you please do me a favour?" I just nodded. "Will you please take care of the kids. I'm leaving. You'll understand at some point why this is happening but right now this is too much for me. Things I thought I had worked on are resurfacing and I need to leave." I agreed to look after the kids and she thanked me. "Baba, MaDlamini is really upset and she's planning on driving home alone. I don't think it's a good idea." I didn't like her, but I was worried about her. If she left the village now she would still be driving when the sun set. I didn't want to be away from my husband but if he had to drive her so be it. He went to speak to her and I agreed to him driving back with her. I packed them some food and they left. Luckily they would be back Sunday. "Makoti, I'm leaving for the city early tomorrow morning but I've called Veronica. She's going to stay here with you and the kids." I was a newly wed but somehow I ended being this family's nanny. 40 I stayed in the house with Ma and the kids that night. Early the next morning Ma left. I made breakfast and that woke the kids. They were excited about the river so I started packing our lunch. "Good morning!" Veronica shouted cheerfully when she came in. I was glad she was here because I was not in the mood. I dealt with Buhle and the food while she helped the rest of the kids. "You're going in that?" She asked looking at my outfit. I was wearing on of my long skirts and apron ma got me with a scarf tied around me like a sash. I obviously had a head covering because I know how people can get. "Yes." "Aren't you going to swim?" I just shook my head and got Buhle's bag packed. We made our way down to the river and everyone greeted us a long the way. It was almost like they were coming out of their houses on purpose. I set up the blanket and picnic while Veronica joined the kids in the water. Much like myself, Buhle was in a terrible mood. She just wanted to be held and didn't want to go anywhere near the water. The kids had the time of their life and immediately went to sleep when we got home. "So, tell me. What's up?" Veronica asked when I started cleaning up. "What do you mean?" She just rolled her eyes at me. "You're quiet but you're not this quiet and you haven't smiled once today." I just sighed. "Wow, that bad huh? We're family now. You can talk to me." I started chopping vegetables for dinner. "Okay, you don't need to say anything now. We can talk whenever you're ready." I didn't realize that Nozipho's party was such a big deal. It was such a big deal that we got to watch the red carpet on Veronica's laptop. I know I went after Moses for money but along the way I fell in love and seeing him happy on that red carpet with Nozipho was painful. I cried myself to sleep that night. I knew what the situation would be going into a polygamous marriage but it still hurt seeing someone else make my husband happy. "Makoti. Are you awake?" I got out of my bed quickly. "Yes, I'll be out in a minute." I looked at my phone and realized it was already one in the afternoon. I put cream under my eyes hoping to take the bags away but nothing could save my red puffy eyes. "Why didn't you wake me. Have the kids eaten? Where's Buhle?" I asked taking random ingredients out of the fridge. "The kids are fed and happy. They're playing outside." Veronica said. "Why didn't you wake me?! I have cleaning to do!" She looked worried. "MaZulu. Calm down. Nobody is here. You can take the day off. Calm down." I pulled my arm away from her. "MaZulu." She tried calming me but I just grabbed the broom and started cleaning. At the end of the day I was exhausted. I definitely overexerted myself but I felt like I had to otherwise something would go wrong. "MaZulu, Moses says he wants to come back early but he's been pulled into a business emergency. He said to pack and that he'll send a car tomorrow. The car will be here by twelve." I just knew she had something to do with it. "Okay." Is all I said before I helped everyone pack. The kids were excited to go back home. The ride home felt like it took forever but we finally got there. "Mamakhe, how are you doing?" He kissed my cheek. "I'm fine, Baba." "Let's get you inside. It looks like rain." He took my hand we went into the house. "Lunch has been prepared. " He led me to the table and it was only me and him. "Where's everyone?" I asked taking a seat. "The kids ran straight to the movie theatre and Nozipho and my mom have gone Christmas shopping. It's just us." I nodded and took a bite. "Zethu, are you okay?" I nodded and he took my hand. "Don't lie to me. Come on, Baby." I was holding back tears because I felt stupid for feeling the way I did. "Mamakhe, please." I started biting my lip. "I'm just tired." I managed to get out. "Okay, let's go upstairs. We'll just sleep okay. Come on." He helped me out of my chair and we went upstairs. I laid on his chest and he rubbed my back. My body was shaking because I was working so hard to keep my tears back. I couldn't fight it anymore and I started crying. "There you go. Let it out." He held me tighter as I cried. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asked when my crying died down. "I'm sorry for neglecting you this weekend. I didn't mean to. I know both of us didn't plan it this way but I'll try my best to be the husband you deserve." We laid there and fell asleep together. "Moses! My boy! Where are you!" Ma's screaming woke me. I let out a sigh of defeat. She stormed into my room. "Moses, wake up. You said you'd join us for breakfast and then take me to the shops."I got off him and turned around because I knew I didn't stand a chance against his mother. "Ma, you can't just barge in here." What? What did he say? "Yes, I can. This is my son's house." I laid still listening for his response. "Yes, it's your son's house. My house. And I say you can't just barge into our rooms. You wait for us. Ma can you please go wait downstairs. Please." I was shocked. I didn't think he had it in him. "Moses, what has gotten into you?" She asked with a shaky voice. "Ma, please. Can you give us some space. We'll be down in a bit." I heard the door close and he pulled me back onto his chest. "Just holding you brings me so much joy." He said holding on tight. "I love you Baba." "I love you too, Mamakhe." 41 We got dressed and went downstairs. Nozipho, Veronica and Ma were at the table eating. "What are you wearing?! Have you gone mad?! Go change!" I looked down at my outfit. I was wearing a long bodycon dress. I was wearing my head covering and scarf like required. I was dressed appropriately. "Ma, you've seen me dressed like this many times." "Are you talking back to me!? Huh!? What's the point of wearing a long dress if I can still see every curve and bulge in your body!? You're dressed like a slut! Go change!" I was too shocked to even move. "Ma!" Veronica yelled. "Ma, what's gotten into you? There's nothing wrong with what my wife is wearing. If I have an issue with it I'll address it. We're not in the village. There's no reason for her to dress like a nun. Ma, what's gotten into you?" Moses asked disappointed. "Nothing has gotten into her Moses. This is exactly how she was when we first got married but she couldn't control me like she can MaZulu. So, do you know what she did? She sent me off to the most secluded village she could find expecting me to somehow turn into her slave. I warned you about this MaZulu. I warned you." "Arg, shut up Nozipho this has nothing to do with you!" Ma shouted at her. "The only reason you want me to shut up is because you don't want me to show everyone who and what you really are. I'm done being portrayed as the villan here. Everyone deserves to know the truth." I had no idea what was going on with Nozipho. "Nozipho what are you on about?" Nozipho just scoffed. "Noah will be here with his wife in about an hour. Nobody is going anywhere. You'll sit and listen and maybe then you'll realize what your mother is actually like." Ma scoffed and grabbed her bag. "I don't have time for this. I'm leaving!" She tried walking out but Moses stopped her. "Sit! Down!" He yelled in her face. "The way you're reacting shows me you definitely have something to hide. So sit down so we can finally discuss this. I'm tired. I'm tired of being kept in the dark. So sit down!" We sat in awkward silence waiting for Moses' brother to arrive. They finally arrived and one of the maids served tea. "Nozipho, you called the meeting. We're all listening." Moses said and I was surprised he was calm. Especially since our last meeting with his brother was such a mess. "Okay, do you remember back when we were first trying to have a child?" He nodded. "We were struggling for months and they sent that girl here to sleep with you because they thought I was the problem." Wait... What? "Luckily you sent her away and I insisted on tests. Somehow your mother got the results and found out that the problem was you. We didn't go for further test and doctors checkups she just told us we were fine and it was probably the stress from trying." Moses just nodded. "She invited me to her house and when I got there all the elders were sitting in a circle in the living room. They explained to me that you couldn't have children and it was part of our culture for your brother to give you children. I refused." Her voice got shaky. "Nozipho stop lying! Stop this! Stop!" Ma screamed. "She's not lying. I was there. Moses and Nomzamo deserve to hear this." Noah said calmly. "Carry on MaDlamini." "They tried to convince me that it's the only way but I refused and I told them you would understand. We could find another way. They insisted but I refused again." Tears were starting to form in her eyes. What did they do to her? "Your mother came from behind and started beating me with a stick." She finally got out. "You're lying! She's lying Moses! You little bitch!" She ran to Nozipho but before she could touch her Noah grabbed her. "Speak MaDlamini! I've got her! She's not going to hurt you!" Noah held onto his mother who was fighting her hardest to get out of his grip. "She beat me until I bled and finally agreed. They told Noah if he didn't do it they would beat me again until he agreed too. So we did it. And every single time your mother sent one of your uncles in to check if we did it properly." She was full on crying. "I eventually fell pregnant but it wasn't a boy. So they made us do it again and the twins came but they weren't boys either. I was so terrified when you told your family you wanted to try again for a boy that I went to Noah and begged him because I wouldn't survive another beating and I couldn't handle your uncles coming in everytime and checking me." Moses was in tears too. He stood up and went to hold her while she cried. What kind of person would do this to someone. I couldn't imagine it. Even after all of this she still had to face them on a daily basis like nothing happened. No wonder she hates them all so much. "Ma, get out." "Moses my boy, please." "Get out! Get out of my house!" "Moses." "If you don't get out I'll physically throw you out myself! Get! Out!" She grabbed her bag and walked out slowly. She looked back and when she realized nobody was going to say anything she left. I made everyone tea but when I served it Nozipho wasn't at the table. I looked for her and found her in the sun room. "I brought you some tea." She looked at me and rolled her eyes. "Why does your face look like that? Next time put some makeup on or something. Moses and I have people come over here to discuss business and I can't afford a scandal because you have bags under your eyes. Get it together." She said rudely. "I'm confused. I thought we were finally becoming friends Nozipho." I knew she was going through something but there was no need for her to be rude to me. "Nozipho? Who the hell do you think you are little girl? We are not friends. We never will be. You will address me with respect. I was nice to you because I needed a babysitter." I could feel a knot rise in my throat. "Leave the tea and get out of my sight." 42 Moses spent more time with his brother in the week leading up to Christmas. Nozipho was becoming more and more of a bitch and she would order me around like I was her maid. I spent most of my time doing stuff for her and spending time with the kids. I tried calling my friend, Sethu, but she was ignoring every single one of my calls. "MaZulu, I'm leaving. Moses and I are going out to lunch. You can make something for you and the kids since the staff has gone home for the holidays." She said and left immediately. I made lunch and spent the rest of the day with the kids. It was almost midnight and I hadn't heard anything from Moses or Nozipho. I tried calling and texting but they didn't pick up. I was completely alone with the kids in this huge house. If anything were to happen I wouldn't know what to do. I eventually fell asleep on the couch and woke up to kisses on my face. It was Moses. "Morning beautiful." I pushed him off me and made my way upstairs. "Mamakhe! What's going on!" I ignored him and went up to my room. "Mamakhe, wait." I slammed my door in his face and locked it. I took a shower while he banged on the door. I got dressed and did my hair and I heard the door unlock. I looked back to find Nozipho smirking. "There's no need to doll yourself up. We have a chef coming in for Christmas so every inch of that kitchen needs to be scrubbed. Moses left with his brother. What did he say again? Oh, he said he doesn't have time for the tantrum you're throwing. If we had a scoreboard you would be sitting at zero and I would be making it impossible for you to catch up." She laughed and left. I knew I wasn't going to get out of it so I put on an apron and went to the kitchen. "Here you are. Unpack all of the cupboards and wash everything. I don't need to be embarassed by dust. Make sure you clean the cupboards before you put everything back. Oh yes, clean the fridge too. I'll be checking in on you to make sure you're not slacking." For the next two days I was busy in that kitchen. Luckily the kids would come down sometimes and keep me company. Buhle spent her naptimes on my back while I cleaned. My bond with Nozipho's children became stronger than their own mother. "What are you doing? Aren't you supposed to be cleaning something?" I rolled my eyes. "So I should stop feeding your hungry baby because you want to control and direct all of my time and energy to chores instead of my husband?" Before I knew it she slapped me. I was so surprised I just sat there holding my cheek while Buhle cried. "Speak like that again and I'll do something worse. You're disgusting! You're a child and you went after my husband! You're a child! You're the thing they warn all wives about and here you are sitting in my house with a ring! You're lucky I haven't beaten you yet! You're a slut! You opened your legs and Moses married you! That's all there was to it. Now look at you. Irrelevant! He doesn't even look at you anymore!" She laughed hysterically and walked away. I cried silently and fed Buhle. Her words hurt so bad that I felt a pain in my chest. I hated it here. I would rather die in my shack than live here but now I was trapped. I never really understood what they meant by 'be careful what you wish for' but now I understand it fully. I smiled through Christmas, I smiled through new years and when the kids finally went back to school the beatings got worse. Nozipho was merciless. She made sure never to touch my face so Moses wouldn't know. Through all the chores and the beatings I didn't have the energy to deal with my husband. Moses only slept with me when he and Nozipho were fighting and that's usually when Nozipho beat me the hardest. He said that I was lazy and using him. He even said that I tricked him because I don't do the things I used to do. The only time I got to rest was when Nozipho didn't work from home. She was out and I ordered a Uber to my friend, Sethu's house. She still hasn't been taking my calls. She couldn't be this mad. I assumed she was mad because I didn't invite her to my wedding. "I'm coming!" I heard from inside the house and the door opened. "Oh, it's you. Are you slow? Did you not get the message? I don't want to talk to you." She said and tried closing the door but I stopped her. "Sethu please. We're friends." She opened the door a little and I thought she would let me in. "Friends? Friends invite each other to their wedding. Friends don't disappear on friends for weeks and months on end. Friends don't just contact their friend when somethings going wrong in their life. Which I can clearly tell from how you look. You look pathetic. Did your rich husband leave you because you look more like the maid to me. What do you even have on? You look worse then you did when you were living in a shack. Do you remember that? When you were one of us peasants 'princess'." I knew this was not going well and it wouldn't work out. I wanted to make it work but I just didn't have the energy. I also didn't have any excuses. So much happened so quickly and I didn't have the time to stay in contact with her. "Okay, I'll leave. It was good seeing you." "Fuck you, Zethu!" She said and slammed the door shut in my face. I started walking because I had nothing else to do. Nobody even recognized me. Did I look that bad? "Zethu? Is that you?" I looked behind me to see my old neighbor, MaMlambo. She used to help me out a lot when I lived in my shack. "MaMlambo?" Her eyes went wide. "It is you. I never thought I'd see you back here." "I just came to see Sethu and decided to take a walk." My voice came out shaky but I couldn't control it. She looked concerned but nodded. "Okay, how about you come home with me and we have an early supper for old times sake?" I didn't know what to say. "I'll take your silence as a yes. Come on." We made our way to her shack and started on dinner. "How's your husband and family? I saw your wedding on the news. You looked beautiful." I forced myself to smile. "Thank you, Ma. Everyone is still fine." She just nodded and cleared her throat awkwardly. "And you? Are you fine?" I just nodded. "Zethu, you don't look fine my dear. You've never looked this bad ever. You were almost unrecognizable. Zethu, what's happened?" I stood frozen with my eyes welling up. "Zethu, did your husband leave you?" I shook my head and shut my eyes tightly as tears started to fall. "What's wrong?" I flinched when she put her hand on my back. It still hurt from when Nozipho beat me. "Zethu?" She whispered. "No, he seemed like such a good man. Is he hitting you?" I shook my head. "Zethu don't lie to me! Do not lie to me! Is that man abusing you!?" "No! I swear he's not!" She pulled up my shirt and gasped. "Zethu." I closed my eyes because I could hear the disappointment in her voice and there was no need for me to see it in her face. "Zethu, my child. Tell the truth. Did he do this to you?" I let out a whimper. "No, it wasn't him." "Then who?" "His wife." 43 I explained everything to her from the beginning. She was too scared to let me go home but I had to because Moses started calling my phone. I promised to keep in touch with her and I left. "Where the hell have you been!?" Moses yelled when I walked into the room. "You see ma, this is what I'm talking about. She has no respect for this family. Everything good about her was all an act." Nozipho said to Moses's mother. I thought Moses cut her off. I didn't understand what she was doing her. I was getting dizzy and their yelling started to give me a headache. "This is not what I expected of you MaZulu! Was all of it just an act to get my son's to marry you?! This is sick! You made us think you were innocent! You made us think you loved my son! Even Nozipho made space for you in this family! We gave you everything and as soon as you got married you showed us who you really are!" I couldn't do it anymore. My eyelids wouldn't stay open and my body felt heavy. I felt myself falling and I couldn't do anything about it. Everything around me went black. "Mamakhe wake up. Please wake up so you can tell us who did this to you." Moses's head was laying beside me and he had a tight grip on my hand. "Moses, her eyes are open. Zethu?" Moses jumped up beside me. I seemed to be in a hospital room. "Mamakhe, you're awake." He tried kissing me but I turned my head away. "Let me get the doctor." Ma said and left us alone. "Mamakhe, how are you feeling?" He asked and I kept quiet and just stared at him. I loved him but I also hated him for his part in all of this. "Mrs Gumede you're awake. It's good to see you. I'm doctor Samuels." "Can you please remove these people from my room?" Everyone including the doctor looked shocked. "Mamakhe, please." Moses begged but I didn't care. "Can you have security escort them?" The doctor nodded and Moses and his mother left. The doctor explained to me that I had internal bleeding and they had to open me up to fix it. They also had policemen come in and talk to me but I decided not to open a case. The doctor then explained to me that he could keep a file to build up evidence and whenever I was ready I could go to the police. He thought Moses was abusing. I still let him start the file and take pictures of all the marks on my body. I might need it to stop Nozipho. I asked for my phone and when I got it I saw that someone was attempting to unlock it. I called MaMlambo and she came to the hospital to sit with me. "Your husband and mother-in-law are sitting outside. Have you told them what happened?" I rolled my eyes. "No, they're part of the problem." MaMlambo visited me everyday in the hospital until I got out. Her sister's kids came to visit her so I was on my own once I was discharged. Everything still hurt but I refused any help from Moses and walked myself in. "I got the maids to prepare a room on the first floor for you so you don't have to use the stares." Nozipho said looking extremely nervous and guilty. I just glared at her. "MaZulu, did you hear what your sister said?" Ma asked as if to get me to comply. I started struggling up the stairs because I didn't want to deal with them. I was awoken from my nap by a knock. "Foods ready. I brought it up to you." What was Nozipho doing? Being nice so I wouldn't tell everyone that she almost killed me? "I'm not taking any food from you." She just stood there. "Umm, you have to eat, MaZulu." Was she serious. "Well, you didn't care about my eating habits when you were torturing me." Her lip started to quiver. "MaZulu, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... I let my emotions get the better of me. I'm sorry MaZulu, I swear I'll make it up to you. Please just don't tell anyone. Please." She could not be serious right now. "Nozipho leave me alone. Please, just leave me alone." She nodded. "And take the food with you." I did not trust anything they gave me. I would rather starve. I got a text from Veronica saying she was on her way and I asked her to bring me something from a restaurant. "I'm here. I was swarmed by my mother telling me to get you to talk. Do you want to talk about it?" I shook my head. "Okay. I brought food. Lots of food." She came over and sat next to me in bed and we ate and watched movies. She was finally busy planning her wedding. She showed me some of the dresses she had in mind. "You're having a white wedding?" She nodded. "Yep, I didn't get to do that the last time so I'm definitely doing it this time." We went through dresses and hairstyles and makeup until we fell asleep. "Knock knock. Are you ladies awake? I brought breakfast." I opened and eyes and saw MaRadebe at the foot of the bed. She still has not even attempted an appology for everything she said before I fainted. "Morning, Ma." Veronica said stretching. "Morning my baby. Morning MaZulu." She said and I just stared at her her blankly. She put the food down and left. Luckily, Veronica didn't ask me about it. She just took her plate. "Are you not eating?" I shook my head. "I'll download an app and order something later." She looked confused. "Why, there's so much food here already." I scoffed. "I'm not risking it." I struggled out of bed to my closet and then to the bathroom where it took me forever to bath. I ordered food and waited at the top of the stairs for it. "Mamakhe, at some point we need to talk." Moses said trying to take my hand. "Why? For almost two months I didn't exist to you. Now all of a sudden you want to talk to me like I'm a human. You might not have been responsible for what happened to me but I blame you. You and Nozipho deserve each other." "Now what does that mean?" I just rolled my eyes. "Moses you claim that Nozipho is the evil one and that she's the problem. Both of you are the problem. Now please, leave me alone." 44 I spent all of my time in my room. I ordered all of my food and waited at the stairs for the maid to get it for me. Veronica spent most of her time with me. Sometimes she would try and get me to talk but I would change the topic. Buhle was getting big. It made me sad that I missed her birthday while I was in hospital but it looked like she had a great time in the pictures Veronica posted. I was struggling down the staircase because my doctor said I need to start moving around. The pain was so bad I had to stop and fight my tears. "Mamakhe let me help." I hit Moses's hand away from me. "Don't touch me!" I covered my face with my hands. I couldn't stop the tears anymore. "I saw you were in pain and I wanted to help." His words triggered me. "I've been in pain for months and not once did you pay any attention to it!" Ma, Veronica, and Nozipho ran to the steps to see what was happening. "Mamakhe, I didn't know. I still don't know." "Thats because you're never here! You're never here! You're a lier and the only thing you care about is yourself!" "MaZulu." Ma said shocked. "Don't 'MaZulu' me. I don't have the energy for this right now." "So when will you have the energy. Huh?! Because all of a sudden my wife ends up in hospital and I'm accused of abuse! Not once have I touched you so where do the marks come from?! Do you have a lover?! Are you cheating on me?!" I was completely blindsided by Moses's questions. "With all of this going on your one thought is that I'm cheating on you? Everything I've endured for the sake of this marriage and you accuse me of cheating. Wow." "Well you're not denying it!" He was starting to get angry. "Moses, come on she's still recovering." Nozipho added and I knew she just wanted us to change the subject. "If you're not cheating on me then where were you getting the beatings from?!" "Moses, stop." Nozipho said. "No, answer me! Where are you getting the beatings from?!" "Moses!" "Answer me dammit! Who could've done this to you?! You ended up in hospital! They had to cut you open! I had to spend hours in interrogation rooms! Answer me!" "What is going on?!" Moses's elders walked in. "Stay out of it! Answer me now or I'm packing your bags! MaZulu!" I had never been this disappointed in someone in my life before. Not even my parents who abandoned me made me feel this way. "That's it! I'm packing your bags!" "It was me! Moses it was me!" Nozipho yelled crying. "This is not the time to stick up for her. She's been giving you hell for months!" This man was literally ripping my heart out of my chest. "No, Moses I'm not lying! It was me! I didn't mean for it to go this far! I never wanted to put her life in danger. I just thought... MaZulu I'm sorry. I didn't mean to." The bitch was sobbing. "No." "Really, Moses. A full confession and you still don't believe her?" My voice came out in a whisper. I couldn't do it anymore. I forced myself to walk through the pain and get back to my room. I stepped into my bathroom to get some pain medication because my abdomen was killing me. "MaZulu what are you doing!" Veronica grabbed the bottle put of my hand. "I know you've been through a lot but this is not the answer." Oh my god. She thought I was... "Veronica calm down. Its half past one. I was supposed to take these thirty minutes ago already." "Oh." She said awkwardly. I got all my other medication and took it with her watching me the whole time. I won't lie I say I haven't thought about it. I've thought about it every single day since my mother dumped my brother and I in that shack. Even in the good times I think about it. Sicelo was always the only thing keeping me here. "The elders requested your presence downstairs." I sighed in frustration. I don't know why they always thought they could come in and solve everything with a meeting. All they did was bark orders and leave thinking everything was fine. They had no idea how to actually deal with anything. She helped me downstairs and to my seat at the table. I knew I looked a mess but I didn't care. "MaZulu please explain to us what happened." One of the ladies said. "Really? Are you being serious? I am not discussing anything with any of you. You never fix anything. All you do is make it worse. MaDlamini, even after everything you've put me through I feel sorry for you. I truly feel sorry for you because the people sitting at this table put you through so much torture. What I don't understand however, is how you go through that and do it to someone else. Was this your plan all along? When you decided you wanted this to be a polygamous marriage is this what you had planned? What kind of sick woman goes through all of that abuse only to do it to another woman. I hope you're happy because you've succeeded. I don't know if you wanted to punish me because I slept with your husband or because I was the wife this family wanted you to be, but you've succeeded in your mission to destroy me. Well done. I'm completely broken. You've broken me and I hope that you're happy." She was sitting there crying harder than I was. "MaZulu, we still need to discuss what all this means for the family." The uncle in charge said. "What it means for the family? How does me getting beaten and tortured everyday for the past two months affect the family? If Nozipho didn't do it you would've done it when you felt the need for me the bare an heir." He was stunned into silence. "My elders I don't mean any disrespect but can you please leave my house. I don't think it's a good idea for you to be here at the moment. There's a lot that we need to work out on our own. I think it's only right that you give us a chance to do that. I'll keep you updated." They eventually left and we were left alone. Sitting in silence. All that could be heard was Nozipho's sniffing. 45 That day passed and so did many. I was back to being ignored. The other wife. Nozipho and Moses moped around the house more but nothing changed. I kept Buhle happy and that made me happy. "MaZulu, I made tea." I was sitting outside by the pool to get some sun when Nozipho disturbed me. She poured for us and took a sip. "Oh come on MaZulu, this has gone on way too long. Can we at least start working towards some kind of relationship. We can't all just sit around the whole day hoping someone will start talking." I sighed. "What do you want, MaDlamini?" "I know you're far from forgiving me for what I did to you but can we try and work together to make this a family again." I rolled my eyes at her. "When has this ever been a family?" She put her tea down and sat back in her chair. "MaZulu please, can we just start somewhere? It can be anything." She pleaded with me. "MaDlamini, why are you doing this?" "I'm tired. I'm extremely tired of fighting everything that comes into my life. I've accepted the situation and I want to make the best out of it. MaZulu, I know you're not a bad person and I know you're not here to break down my family. I've done most of that. But at some point I convinced myself that you were the enemy when you weren't and I missed out on getting to know you. I just want to make this work." Even after everything she has done I felt sorry for her and I hated that I felt that way. "Fine." She said sadly. "I'll leave you alone." I was having an internal fight with myself because one part of me wanted to forgive her and fix my marriage but the other part of me just couldn't. Moses ignored me from the day we got married and she made sure he was too busy to even notice I was here. But that wasn't enough for her. She made me do impossible tasks and when they weren't done correctly or in time she beat me. It got so bad that sometimes she would just beat me for no reason. How could I forgive that? How? I started making my way inside. I moved slowly because my body still hurt. I dreaded the stairs but my doctor said it would help in my recovery. I was half way up and I couldn't do it anymore. The pain was excruciating. My back was killing, every muscle in my abdomen was sore, my wound still wasn't healed properly and the old injury combined with the new ones on my ribcage made it difficult to breathe. I was standing there crying in silence. I couldn't move. It was too painful. "Mamakhe?" I heard softly. I bit my lip and squeezed my fists for some sort of relief. "Let me just help you. Please. You're in pain and you're not gonna make it up these stairs." My tears were falling and my whole body was shivering. I was in physical and emotional pain. "Mamakhe, should I carry you?" I shook my head but took his hand. Every step was worse than the last. "I think something is wrong. We need to get you to the hospital." At that moment I hated him but he was right. It felt like I was only getting worse. "Nozipho!" He called and she came running. I was way too weak and in too much pain to let my pride take control of me. "Go pack her bag. I'm taking her to the hospital." She nodded and ran upstairs. Moses picked me up and carried me down the stairs. He put me down on a couch and then made a call. "I packed a comfortable pyjamas and two tracksuits just incase. I packed all your necesseties I thought you might need. If you need anything else just text me. Oh! Your phone!" She ran back upstairs. She was in panic mode. Never have I heard a person speak that fast before. Moses started the car and I couldn't even stand the seatbelt on my around my waist. "Buhle." Was all I could get out. "Don't worry about her. I'll take care of her." We drove to the hospital where doctors were already waiting for us. They ran tests and asked me thousands of questions. I didn't know so many things could be wrong in my body. My blood pressure was low, my iron was low, my blood sugar was low. I was admitted into hospital for a few more tests but my diet seemed to be the main problem. They took so much blood I didn't think they could find more veins to draw it from. I was annoyed that I had to stay until they saw any improvement. Moses was with me the entire time. I knew I still loved him but I was just too hurt. I was definitely doubting his love for me. I know my plan from the beginning was just to give Sicelo a comfortable life but it went too far and I've now gotten myself into a mess of emotions. It was almost midnight and I still couldn't get myself to sleep. Neither could Moses. I was tossing and turning. "Mamakhe." Moses said and took my hand. "Shh. It's going to be okay." I felt a sense of calmness washing over me when I heard him say that. "I'm scared. What's wrong with me?" My mouth said what my heart was trying so hard to keep back. "It's okay. Everything is going to be okay. I know all of us aren't on good terms but I've informed that family and everyone is praying for you." He kissed my hand. "I'm sorry, MaZulu. This is all my fault. If I had been a better husband to the both of you none of this would've happened. I'm so so sorry." I felt my bottom lip quivering and couldn't stop the sobs that came after. "Mamakhe?" He stood up from his chair and got in bed next to me. "Talk to me. Please." He rubbed my back as I balled my eyes out. "Why don't you love me?" I sounded pathetic. "What do you mean, Mamakhe. You're the love of my life." "No I'm not." I tried to break away from him but he held onto me tighter. "Ever since our wedding you've been ignoring me and pushing me away. The only thing you wanted me from was sex and when I couldn't give you that you treated me badly." His grip loosened. "Mamakhe, I didn't mean to. I didn't even know I was doing that." "But you did! You treated me like a piece of meat. You were either out with your brother or out with Nozipho. When you came back you didn't even notice how tired and beat up I was. You didn't care. You took what you wanted and left. You didn't even spend full night's in my room. So what am I to you Moses? I am not going to continue living like this. It took me almost dying for you to notice that I'm still here. I gave you and Nozipho everything but all the two of you gave me was pain. So, I think it's best I leave." 46 Not one of us slept that night. Moses held onto my had for dear life and I let him while I looked the other way crying silently. I spent a few days in the hospital and when tests came back normal I went home. "The room downstairs is still there. Going up and down the stairs is too hard on your body." I just nodded and went to go lay down. I eventually fell asleep. "I don't know what to do. She wants to leave me." I heard Moses crying outside my room. "She's still sleeping but I think we should all sit down and talk." I closed my eyes and acted as if I was sleeping when I heard the handle. I eventually did fall asleep. When I woke up I bathed myself and tried combing my hair. It was too matted for me to do anything so once again I just covered it with a scarf. "MaZulu, dinner is ready." Nozipho said coming into the room. "We were hoping you'd sit down with us." I just went. I didn't feel like fighting anymore either. She helped to the table and we sat down and ate. I didn't eat much. I just didn't feel like it. And the food that I did eat felt like I was fighting myself to swallow it. "Um, I think it's become clear to me that the problem lies with me." Moses said and I couldn't agree more. "I decided to take some time off at work and go to my brother's farm." I heard Nozipho sigh. "Don't worry MaDlamini, I'm not running away from my issues. Close to the farm there is a man who has seven wives. I want to go learn from him because let's face it. None of us here knows how polygamy actually works. Now I know we are modern and we live in the city so we can't exactly adopt their way of life as is but at least I'll have the fundamental knowledge to proceed. I know when MaZulu and I started dating I saw this going in a different direction but now things have changed. MaZulu I know we've hurt you alot. We've taken you for granted but please give us one more chance. I'm begging you. MaDlamini, I've been a terrible husband to you and even after that I didn't change my ways. I made the exact same mistake with MaZulu. I hope both of you have it in your heart to forgive me. I also hope you two get to know each other and become friends. When I'm gone, please MaDlamini, you're the first wife here. You're supposed to be an example for MaZulu and show her the ways of our family. You two have a lot to discuss and I hope you do that when I'm gone. My mother will be joining the two of you. Not that I don't trust you, I just need to be sure that leaving you ladies alone won't cause anymore pain. She won't interfere she'll just live alongside you." He packed and left the very next day. I went to the living room so I could go sit in the sun but Nozipho was there. "Don't leave. Please." I just stood there. "Look, I'm really trying here. I want us to get along." I rolled my eyes. "That's what I thought in the week leading up to my wedding. Turns out it was all an act. Now that you're done taking your revenge all of a sudden you want to be friends. You're sick Nozipho. You knew Moses would leave you for me and you decided to force me into this shit show!" "Ladies! My son hasn't even been gone for a full day!" Ma came in with her bags. "No ma. Let us talk. Forced you? You could've said no!" My anger was fueled. "You knew what you were doing when you involved my father and you knew he wouldn't have allowed me to say no! You knew! I was pregnant! You knew! And you decided to ambush me into this in front of a man you knew wouldn't let me have a child out if wedlock!" She stood there awkwardly. Tears welled up in her eyes. "Despite what you believe or were told to believe I love my husband. I had to come to terms with the fact that he fell in love with you. And you're right, he was going to leave me and you would've had your happily ever after. I wasn't ready to let go so I thought I could live with you. You were quiet and respectful and I thought I wouldn't care. But you came in and took everything from me!" She burst out in tears. "You took my husband, you took my children, you took my family! It didn't matter how much they wronged me and how much I hated them. They were still my family! You took everything! And I hated you. That hate turned me into someone I didn't recognize. It was something I had to deal with but I took it out on you and I am so sorry. I just need you to know that I'm sorry. I don't need your forgiveness. I don't deserve it. I tore your life apart. You didn't deserve anything I did to you. I'm sorry Zethu, but please, I don't see any of this working without you. Can we please find a way to move forward?" I stayed quiet. I didn't know what to say. This woman just poured her heart out and I stood there like an idiot. "Okay, how about we sit down have some tea. I brought homemade biscuits. We can sit by the pool." I just went with it because I had nothing to add. We sat in silence drinking tea and eating biscuits. "Okay, I guess I'll speak. I just have one question for the both of you. I'll start with you MaDlamini. Do you want to make this marriage work. And be honest. This is not the time for games." "Yes, Ma. I'm serious when I say I want to make this marriage work." Ma looked at me. "MaZulu, same question." I had no idea what to say. All I knew was everything was weighing heavily on me. "I don't know." Was all I could reply. 47 I was on my bed struggling to clean my wound. I thought I'd be used to it by now but the endless bruises on my abdomen and my stitches from surgery were killing me. They were physically painful yes, but they were also a constant reminder of what happened. My brother was also starting to get suspicious. He always knew when something was wrong. He questioned me about the bags under my eyes the other day. I didn't have the strength to put on makeup like I usually did. "Can I help?" I was in pain and I was frustrated. I had no energy for her. "Nozipho please leave me alone! All you do is talk!" I couldn't stop myself. I was so done. She left without saying anything and I went into the wine cellar. I wasn't breast feeding anymore so I didn't care. I grabbed the closest bottle I could find and went to my room. I drank it and stumbled down to the cellar for another one. "MaZulu." Once again. It was Nozipho. I rolled my eyes and grabbed a bottle. "Come on. You can't drink while taking all that medicine." "Nozipho." "Yes?" "Fuck off." "Okay, but I'm not letting you drink anymore. It could be dangerous." "Arg for fucks sakes. You hate me, I hate you. You were willing to kill me a few weeks ago now I can't do it myself? Leave me the fuck alone Nozipho." "No, give me the damn bottle. Have you lost your mind." She tried to grab the bottle from me but it fell and spilt everywhere. I laughed hysterically. "MaZulu, are you drunk?" I just rolled my eyes and walked out. "So is this what you're going to do while your husband is away?!" "Are the two of you at it again?" Ma came crawling out of the woodworks. "Husband? Husband!" I laughed. "I don't have a husband. Never had one. I live with roommates. He's never here! You should know that!" I couldn't cry so I laughed. "I mean I thought I had a husband. There was a wedding." I was slurring my words and I was really feeling the affects of the alcohol. "I don't have a husband! You don't have a husband! Okay, maybe you have a husband. You've got him back. Yay! That's what you wanted wasn't it. You know, you told me I wouldn't survive in this family. I should've listened and stayed in my damn shack. I would rather have poverty over this." I said walking away. I fell on my bed and immediately went to sleep. "MaZulu, get up. Get up." My head was killing me. "Why are you yelling?" I complained. "I'm literally whispering. Get your ass out of bed. You're father is here." She opened the curtain and the sunlight burned burned my eyes. "Get in the damn shower. I'll bring your clothes." She pulled me out of bed and dragged me to the bathroom. I took a quick shower and put some concealer under my eyes. I put on the dress she gave and she passed me a muffin so I could take my medicine. "Okay, are you ready?" I shook my head no. "Well, it doesn't matter. Let's go." My father was sitting at the head of the table as if it was his house. With him was Veronica and and his first wife. I took a seat and didn't even greet. "MaZulu." He said with a smile on his face. "What do you want?" Him and his his wife looked shocked. "We came here because we heard you were in the hospital and we wanted to see how you're doing. This is not how I should be treated. You're disrespectful." "You didn't speak one word to me after you pushed me off your porch. Not one. I was in your house, waiting for you to say literally anything and you kept quiet so what do you want now?" Ma looked uneasy but my father just sat there expressionless. "Honestly, I want to get to know you. When I heard you were in the hospital my heart broke. They wouldn't tell us anything. What happened?" "I was sick." "So sick you had to go to the hospital?" "Yes." "Really? Really MaZulu? Is this what you're going to do? I'm just trying to have a conversation. I thought I was loosing you. I'm trying to build a relationship here." "We can build a relationship when you bring my child back." "MaZulu." Ma said softly. I guess she was trying to snap me out of it but I didn't care. "If you can bring my child back, the child that you murdered, then we can talk. But for now please leave my house." He sat there in disbelief. What did he think? I would just forget? "Fine. I'll leave." He seemed angry but I didn't care. He got up and left with his wife. I was so angry I could hear my own heartbeat in my ears. "MaZulu?" I raised my hand so Nozipho would stop talking. I didn't need another lecture and another "I'm sorry" from her. I went back to the room and got in bed and cried silently. I've kept my feelings in for so long that it was just spilling out of me. I couldn't control it. No matter how many times I wiped my tears they were still flowing. I heard my door open but I didn't care. I heard footsteps and then my bed dipped. I looked over to see MaDlamini sitting on the bed. "What do you want?" I asked rudely. "Nothing." Her voice was so calm. Almost soothing. She took my hand in hers and just held it. I didn't know what was happening but it was like everything was bumbling up and the flood gates opened. I started crying like a baby. She moved closer to me and I somehow ended up in her lap with her holding my head. "It's okay. Let it out." I held onto her hand tightly as I cried. I cried for hours and when it finally died down into little sniffles my head was aching. She tucked me into bed and I fell asleep immediately. 48 I was too weak to fight anymore. Especially fight my emotions. So I just stopped. I stopped fighting ma and Nozipho. I stopped fighting my feelings. I just wanted to rest. I was exhausted. I went to the kitchen to make myself some tea and Nozipho was there. "I was just going to ask you if you wanted some tea." She said abnormally happy. "Yes, please." I took a seat by the kitchen island. "So, I was thinking." Oh no. What was it now? "We could get our hair and nails done." I shook my head. "Oh come on, MaZulu. I'm trying here." "No, it's not that." I could tell she was getting frustrated with me. "Then what is it?" I sighed. "I don't want to leave the house." Her expression changed to worried. "Okay, we can do something here. We can watch movies tonight." I nodded and she was extremely excited about it. She even sent me an invitation with the dress code being cute pyjamas. I didn't know what that meant. I just found a plane silk two piece set. I went into the bathroom and started working on my hair. I thought getting it wet would help but my comb got stuck. I tried and tried to get it out but nothing would work. Tears of frustration started drilling down face and I threw the bottle of shampoo at the mirror. I didn't know what was going on with me. One moment I felt completely empty and the next I couldn't control my emotions. "Are you okay in there?" I didn't need them to see me like this. They've seen too much and it was getting extremely embarrassing. "I'm fine." I answered and luckily I was left alone. I washed the shampoo out of my hair as best I could and dried it with a hair dryer. I didn't see how anyone could fix it at this point. I just wrapped a scarf around my head again, put my pyjamas on, and met her in the cenema. We watched a couple of movies, ate snacks, drank champagne and ended up falling asleep there. "Mama. Mama. Mama." I heard a tiny voice. Buhle somehow got to the cenema. "Mama!" She squealed. She pointed at Nozipho. "No baby girl. I'm not doing that. You're gonna have to wake her yourself." And like she understood me she walked over to Nozipho and started tapping her leg. "Mama. Mama. Mama." Nozipho groaned but woke up anyway. "Good morning Buhle." Buhle squealed. She was so happy to see us. We played until Ma came to get us for breakfast. "Say Gogo." Buhle just looked at me crazy. "Who's this?" I asked her point to ma. "Say Gogo." She shook her head. "No." No was her new favourite word. She said no to everything. "You're stubborn just like your mother." Ma said and we laughed. "Moses says he's going to stay a few days longer than planned. Something came up with a piece of land near by that he's trying to aquire." Wow, I guess the time away didn't teach him anything. Throughout all of this I somehow convinced myself that Moses would come home a changed man and that we would find some sense of normalcy. I was probably at the height of my delusion when I concocted that nonsense. I decided to sit with my hair and comb it out section by section. I was busy for two day and I still was only halfway done. "What are you doing in here?" Nozipho walked into my bathroom and her eyes went wide. "Whoa." I just rolled my eyes. "Sorry. I didn't mean to... Nevermind. Would you mind if I helped?" I handed her the comb because my arms were numb from all the work. It went faster with her helping and I finally got my hair combed out and washed properly. Moses eventually got back and we were supposed to have some big meeting after dinner. "MaZulu, I booked us hair and nail appointments. They're coming here so your excuse about not wanting to go out is not valid. Your hair needs some love and it needs to get out of that sad doek." I touched my doek as if I was offended. "My doek is not sad." She looked at me as if she was saying "really". "You're wearing an old brown scarf. It doesn't get sadder than that." "Rude." I said rolling my eyes playfully. "It's nice to see the two of you getting along." Moses walked in ruining the mood. "When will we be having dinner?" He asked me as if he just expected me to be making it. "Whenever Gloria is done preparing it." I said and walked out but not before I heard Nozipho say, "Why must you always ruin everything?" We had dinner and Moses and his mother made small talk. The land deal he stayed the extra week for fell through so he went there for absolutely nothing and waisted everyone's time. "Anyway, I learned a lot in my time away but I think the most important is that I need to be fair with the amount of time and energy I put into each household. MaDlamini is my first wife making her the matriarch of this family. She falls under what is called the Great House or Indlinkhulu. MaZulu you're my second wife which means you are the right hand house which is also known as iqadi. If I take a third wife she will be my left hand house known as ikhohlwa." Why the hell would he mention that? "Are you planning on taking a third wife?" I asked before he continued. "Was your tone necessary? I wasn't even finished speaking." The tension between the two of us was palpable. "If it's okay with you can I carry on? Can I speak in my own house?" "Moses come on?" Nozipho pleaded. She really wasn't lying when she said she was done fighting. "No! Don't silence me. I'm done being disrespected in my own house. This is ridiculous. Both of you need to learn some respect! I can't get a word in anymore!" "Fine, we're sorry. Carry on." Nozipho said and she actually sounded senscere. "Let me just get this over with because I don't have the energy to deal with this." He said gesturing at me. "Even though I have a choice as to where I want to sleep I decided to share my time evenly and spend two nights in a row in each of your rooms. I'd also like to start scheduling date nights and whoever I'm spending the night with will be serving my dinner. Cooking and cleaning will be left to the helpers unless anyone wants to do it themselves. Since I was so rudely interrupted I forgot what else I wanted to say but thats the most important so there you go." He said before leaving dramatically. Nozipho sighed and followed him. I heard a sigh from ma too before she left the table. What was I even doing here if everyone hated me so much? If I take up too much space, time, and energy why not just say so and let me go. Before Moses left he was crying because I wanted to leave him now it seems like he can't even stand me. 49 I put on a random summer dress for our hair and nail appointments. We had breakfast. Everyone seemed happy and they were talking business. I obviously had nothing to add to it so I just sat there eating my fruit. Our hair and nails took forever. Nozipho told me about her jewelry business and how she's one of the few people in south Africa who processes raw materials and makes products locally. I actually found her work very interesting. I finally looked like a human again. My wavy weave was just past my shoulder and the stylist did an amazing job of installing it. Moses gave me the cold shoulder for weeks. He kept to the sleeping schedule but when he slept in my room that's all he did. I kept myself busy with Buhle and driving lessons. I was getting better and better but I was too scared to take the test. Nozipho and I got closer. I could even say we were becoming friends and even though my husband was still completely ignoring my existence, I didn't feel as lonely as before. "MaZulu, can I come in?" Nozipho knocked at my bedroom door. I was in the mirror getting ready for bed. "Yes, come in." She took a seat on my couch. "So, I need a favour." She said awkwardly. "Ever since your wedding Moses and I have been dealing with a few internet trolls. We thought they would go away but it's only getting worse. It started with a few of your fans asking where you are, why you never appear in pictures, and why you don't have any social media presence. It's gotten way worse and it's even trending now. 'Free Zethu' has been a trending hashtag for the last two weeks. It's gotten so bad I had to put my phone off." What? Why didn't they tell me? All of this could've been avoided. "Um, okay. I don't know what to say. What can I do?" All of this was so unessasary. "Maybe, we could go out. We'll make it look incognito but get someone to leak our location. I could even do a couple of posts with you. If you're up for it." I nodded. "That's fine. We could do that." She planned it and we decided on brunch. I wore a white off the shoulder high low A-line dress and some heels. I kept my hair loose and Nozipho helped me with my makeup. I looked amazing. Nozipho wore a form fitting nude dress and heels and when her makeup was done we were off to brunch. Earlier in the week Nozipho went live. While she was on live I asked softly if we were still on for brunch Friday and that's how the news leaked. We would let someone leak the location when we got there. The social media world was already buzzing with the news. We actually had a good time. We were eating and drinking but most importantly we were laughing. Our conversation was mostly about the kids but it felt good to just laugh with someone. "Don't look around but we have our first few photographers outside." I was tempted to look so bad but I didn't. "So, what's your deal. Why don't you have social media? It doesn't make sense." I just shrugged. "I don't know. I just never had it in the past so I didn't see the point of having it now." She nodded. "Maybe I'll start using it. Will you help me if I decide?" She excitedly agreed. The crowd outside grew quickly. It wasn't just photographers. It was fans too. Fans that I didn't even know I had. They started singing while waiting for us to come out. Both Nozipho and I were shocked. She had to call for extra security. When they arrived they split the crowd so we could walk. People started screaming when we walked out. I held onto Nozipho's arm because I had no idea what to do. The crowd pushed through the security team but they were quick to respond and made a tight circle around Nozipho and I. It took forever to get to the car but we finally made it. "Oh my gosh! That was a lot of people. I thought it only happened in movies." The car moved slowly and luckily the windows were tinted. "No, there's not usually that much people following me. That was all for you. People haven't seen you since your father announced you to the world. I know in this day and age our royal families aren't really of use but you're literally the only princess. For the last few decades only men were born to the Zulu royals so you're kind of a big deal. You don't know this?What were you doing all that time at your father's house?" "My dad was mostly making me feel like shit for falling pregnant. That's about it. I didn't know it was a big deal. All I know was he was trying to one-up his brother. Apparently his brother got extremely mad after that whole thing and that made him extremely happy." She looked at me skeptically and asked. "Are we cursed? No, really. Are we cursed? We are. We're definitely cursed." What was she talking about? "We come from shitty families and we married into a shitty family. It has to be a curse." "Well, we're here now I guess." I added and we both let out a sigh. We reached home and Moses was there. "My beautiful wives! Ever since your appearance my company stocks have been rising. The shareholders are happy. The board is extremely happy and I can't thank you enough. How about a dinner for the three of us by the beach?" Really? This is what he wanted? For us to be a PR stunt. "I'm quite tired and on top of that I have work to catch up on. Can I get a raincheck? You and MaZulu can go." I knew what she was doing and I glared at her. She just smiled and walked away. "See you tonight I guess." I just nodded and he walked away. The fact that he said "I guess" just rubbed me the wrong way. As if he was disappointed. If he didn't want me anymore he should just say so. He probably didn't want the scandal of divorce but at this point I would even be okay with living separately. It's normal for polygamous marriages. I just can't understand why he still wants me here if he hates me so much. 50 "So? What are you wearing?" I couldn't understand why she was so excited. "I don't know. Anything." I didn't feel like it. I was sitting in my towel on my bed. "Don't be boring. Let me pick something." She went into my closet and came out with a red dress. "Hell no." I said and her face dropped. "Why?" I just shook my head. "No, it looks too desperate. I don't even want to go. Just choose something simple." "What are you two doing?" MaRadebe walked into my room. My room was becoming everyone's room but I didn't mind. The more time we spent together the closer we got. "MaZulu and Moses are going out to dinner. She's being boring and she is adamant on looking boring too. But it's fine, I'm sure I'll find something." I ended up wearing a silk spaghetti strap dress. We took a few pictures and then I met Moses by the staircase. "Are you ready?" He asked eyeing me up and down. I just nodded. "Wait, we want to take pictures of the two of you." MaRadebe and Nozipho came running. They forced Moses and I to take pictures. Those pictures were probably so awkward. We had dinner under a gazebo on the beach. The only thing keeping me calm was the sound of the ocean. I was at my breaking point and Moses just eating his food and not saying anything was pushing me over the edge. I stopped eating and just looked at the ocean while trying to keep my tears back. "MaZulu." I heard after a while. "Are you done?" I just nodded. "You ate one bite." I continued looking at the ocean and my tears started falling. "MaZulu?" I kept my eyes on the ocean. "I want to go home." I said softly. "But we just got here." I kept quiet looking at the ocean. "Okay, we can go back." The fact that he could see I was hurting and did nothing about it felt like a dagger straight to my heart. The drive home was quiet and only my sniffing was heard. I got out immediately when we stopped and made my way to my room. "Why are you back so early?" MaRadebe asked but I just continued to my room. I locked my door and went to go cry in the shower. The next morning Moses left early so he wasn't at breakfast. "MaZulu, how was your date?" MaRadebe asked. "What date?" She looked shocked but I just continued eating. "The date last night with your husband?" She seemed to be confused. "What husband?" She just folded her arms and looked at me in shock. "This is the nonsense that goes on in my son's house and then the elders get thrown out when they step in to help." I rolled my eyes and continued eating. "What's wrong with you, MaZulu?" She asked in a soft voice and I laughed. "Really Ma? It's always MaZulu what wrong with you? MaDlamini what's wrong with you? Have you ever stopped to ask your son what's wrong with him. History repeats itself and the only common denominator is your son. But no, Moses Gumede can do nothing wrong." "MaZulu, I understand that you're hurt but that's no way to speak to me." "No ma! You don't! You don't understand! And that's the problem. Try fixing your son before you attack his wives for reacting to the bullshit he puts us through! At the rate we're going I would've been better off starving in shack in the township!" I was livid. "MaZulu, don't say that. You know that's not true." "Oh, but it is! The day you met me you should've taken your son and left because all he's ever done was hurt me!" "Then leave! Leave! I'll pack your bags for you!" She got up and made her way to the stairs. I followed her to my room and she was busy throwing my clothes off my hangers. "If you don't want to be here then leave! Nobody is forcing you!" If she thought I was going to fight her she had another thing coming. I got a suitcase and helped her. "Fine! I'm leaving! But don't you dare come looking for me this time!" She left me alone and I continued packing. I packed essentials and filled about two suitcases when I heard Moses screaming at his mother downstairs. I didn't even continue packing. I ordered an Uber and closed my bags so I could move them downstairs. I wasn't staying here any longer. "MaZulu what do you think you're doing?" It was Moses. I grabbed my bags and wanted to go but he blocked the door. "Moses move." "I'm not moving." "Move dammit!" I tried pushing him but he stood still. "Why are you stopping me? Why!? You clearly don't want me here anymore so why are you stopping me?!" "You're my wife!" I was livid. I stood there breathing heavily. "You're wife? Why is it that I'm only your wife when I mention leaving. Moses you're a fucking fraud. Our relationship was built on lies. Lies that you somehow convinced me was necessary." I felt like my old self again. The scheming lying Zethu and I liked it. It didn't last long. I looked into his eyes and realized that I still loved this man. He hurt me every chance he got and I still loved him. "You promised my brother and I the world and you've made me pay for it every single day. I don't know what it is that you're trying to accomplish but you're tearing me apart piece by piece. I don't understand what it is that you want from me but I know it's not to be your wife. I've never been your wife." I wiped my tears and sat down. It was the first time I saw Ma and Nozipho in the doorway. "I wasn't rich, I didn't have an inheritance like Nozipho, I didn't study any further than high school. I had nothing, and you came into my life at what I thought was my lowest and still I gave you everything!" Tears started falling from my eyes and his. "You were broken! You were broken and I fixed you! I did! Not your mother, not your wife, not any member of your family! I did!" I felt like I was boiling over. "And here you stand today. You've taken everything you possibly can from me and still you insist on ripping the shell of a person that's left of me to shreds." "Mamakhe." "Don't!" I sat there trying to control my breathing. "You've succeeded Moses." I said after a moment of silence. "Well done. There's nothing left. You've destroyed all of what used to be me. I hope you're happy. I really do." "Zethu..." "No." I interrupted. "It's fine. We can work out some kind of arrangement. I now know that my name is good for your business and marrying you has put me in the spotlight. So let's continue with this fake marriage because both of us can't afford a scandal right now. Your business is booming and I'll figure out a career path but on a personal level I want nothing to do with you." 51 The next two weeks Moses left me alone. I continued with my driving lessons and spending time with Buhle. At some point I started doodling on paper and realized I was creating patterns. It sparked an idea. I was still very skeptical about it and not willing to share it with anyone but I decided to do research. I was on my computer day and night and I started to feel like I had a purpose again. I went down to breakfast one morning and I was shocked to see all the elders sitting there. I took my usual seat across from Nozipho. Both her and Moses looked nervous. "I didn't call them. I swear." I believed him. "It's fine." I didn't really care much. Even if he did call them it still wouldn't have made a difference. "I know you have something against us MaZulu, but if MaDlamini can forgive us for all we've put her through I think you can find it in your heart to do so too." One of the ladies said. "There's a lot that we've heard from MaRadebe but I think we need to hear you out." There was a long pause until I realized they wanted me to speak. "Okay, I'm not sure what you want me to say. Ask, and I'll be willing to answer." I heard a few sighs. "We heard you're not interested in being a wife anymore. If that's the case we can always find someone else." I don't know if this woman thought that would phase me but it didn't. I smiled and they seemed shocked. "Okay, but this time make sure you find a woman without any value because at the moment Moses's wives are the reason he's thriving. We hold so much power in the palms of our hands and somehow you've convinced us that we're expendable." I laughed to myself. "MaDlamini." She was fighting back a smile. "Mm?" She was enjoying every second of this. She couldn't even hide it. "You know I want to thank you for making me do that public appearance. It's been weeks and I'm still all over every screen. I'm sure if you look at your phone or switch on the tv my face will appear. And your son, your precious little boy is making millions off it. I didn't say or do anything. I simply just existed and my existence is feeding your families." They were shocked into silence and I ate my breakfast happily. After breakfast I went to sit by the pool and do some work. "MaZulu." Nozipho said with the biggest smile on her face. "MaDlamini." I replied and we both laughed. "You are crazy. They're still sitting there by the way. I don't know what they're discussing but they're discussing. That's all they do. They discuss stuff and think it's fixing the problem. Anyway, what are you working on? I know you're working on something." "I'll show you when it's ready. But, I've decided to take my driving test. My appointment is tomorrow afternoon. Will you be able to drive me there?" She nodded. "Of course. I don't know why you've been putting this off. You're a good driver." I smiled awkwardly. "Don't Tell me you're going to give me a motivational speech." "I was." She rolled her eyes. "But I'm not anymore. Damn! You've gotten mean." She said and we both laughed. "I'm sorry to disturb but we need to talk. This time I want you to listen to me. Please." Moses said and I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes. "MaDlamini, please stay." He said when she stood up. Both of them sat down and he cleared his throat. "MaZulu, I've messed up. I've messed up big time but I want to try. Please give me a chance to try. Please my love. I'm saying this in front of MaDlamini because she needs to hear this. I've messed up with both of you and I'm willing to do anything and every to get our marriage back on track. MaZulu please. I want my wife back." I couldn't keep it in. I rolled my eyes. "Moses, I was never your wife. I was your midlife crisis. As soon as we signed our marriage certificate I became irrelevant. So can we please stop pretending? It's exhausting." He left me alone and the elders asked to stay for a couple of days. The next day Nozipho drove me to my driving test and I passed. I couldn't believe I passed it. She made me drive her home. Everyone was waiting for us outside. I saw Moses's assistant filming us from the crowd. "What's going on?" I asked Nozipho pointing to the man with a phone in one hand and a camera in the other. "I don't know. Just go with it." We got out of the car and I was glad Nozipho dressed me. "What's going on?" I asked suspiciously. "Did you pass?" Moses asked and the camera came closer to me. "Yes." They all looked really suspicious "Surprise!" The crowd yelled and moved away to reveal a car. The first thing I noticed was the number plate. It said MaZulu. I was shocked. Moses handed me keys. I had no idea what car it was. I just knew it was expensive. "What's happening?" I asked again and the crowd laughed. "This is for you." Moses said and handed me the key. I hugged him because he had a damn camera on my face. He showed me the car. I loved it and I was grateful but was the camera man really needed? I guess this is what I signed up for. I was a permanent PR stunt now. After all the excitement I took a short drive in it with Moses. "Do you like it?" He asked when we got back home. "Yes, thank you." That's all that was said and then we went inside. Moses posted the video and once again my face was all over the media." "Her voice is so smooth. Did you hear that?" A tv presenter said on the screen. "Her voice alone turns me on. If sex was a sound it would be her voice." "Ew! Turn that off! Why would they say that on tv!" I was creeped out. "These two are notorious for their disgusting commentary. I don't understand why they still have a show. The benefits of having a penis I guess. So? What's up?" She asked and I shrugged. "Nothing much." She just hummed. "I know it's none of my business but I think one day you'll come to regret this little arrangement of yours. It's quite obvious that the two of you still love each other." I rolled my eyes. "Why? Because he bought me a car?" I asked sarcastically. "No. This arrangement wouldn't even be a thing if you weren't in love with him anymore. The two of you just need to get through this rough patch." I was annoyed because she was right. I did love Moses but that wasn't enough anymore. "MaZulu, the elders are leaving. Can you please come down so we can say goodbye." I nodded and followed Moses downstairs. We all said out goodbyes and then one of the wives took out a photoframe. "Fikile, your stepmother sent you this. She found it in your room and framed it for you." I took the frame to see an ultrasound scan. My hand started shaking and I gave the frame to Moses. "MaZulu are you okay?" I just nodded and hid my hands behind my back. They left and I went up to my room. When everyone was asleep I got a bottle of wine and went to sit outside with my feet in the pool. "MaZulu." I looked behind me to see Moses. "Have you been out here the whole night?" Thats when I realized the sun was starting to rise. I just shrugged. He took a seat next to me. "I'm sorry." He said and I rolled my eyes. I was tired of hearing it. "For what?" I was extremely fed up. "For everything. I let everything going on around me distract me from the fact that you're the love of my life. You were there when nobody else was. You made me whole again when I was broken and all I did was tear you down. I'm sorry Mamakhe." We just sat there in silence until breakfast. I didn't eat though. I went to bed. I was too confused to sit at a table with Moses at the moment. I wanted him back so bad but my pride wouldn't allow. I wanted to hold him. Or even just touch, kiss him, smell him. Anything! But there was still something inside of me holding me back. 52 After my nap I went downstairs to make myself tea and a sandwich. "You're up." MaDlamini came in poured herself some fruit juice. "Yep, you working from home?" She nodded and took a sip of her juice. "MaZulu, you know it wouldn't hurt speaking to someone." What was she getting at. "About what?" She cleared her throat awkwardly. "You've been through a lot in the past year and a half. Maybe you should go see someone." "I'm fine MaDlamini. Stop worrying about me." She got that guilty look on her face again. I didn't like it because I knew the events of the past few months were running through her brain. "MaZulu, you're up. I thought you would sleep all day. Oh, and your wearing pants." This woman wouldn't stop. "Ma, I'm wearing pants too." Nozipho tried reasoning with her. "You work, MaDlamini. She's a housewife. A housewife wearing pants in the presence of her mother-in-law. She knew I was here and she knew before she came down those stairs that it goes against our culture. Your recovery is done. That means no more pants. When you come down here your head will be covered and you'll be wearing a skirt or a dress." "Ma, please be reasonable. We're not in the village." Nozipho tried defending me. "We're not but that doesn't mean she should loose all of her respect for our culture. When she first got here she never would have said the things she did at dinner. I have never in my life been so embarrassed. She's been acting like this ever since the two of you got close." I could see what she was saying was bothering Nozipho. "It's okay. I'll go change. I'm sorry, it just became a habit after I came out if hospital." Everything I said felt wrong but I wasn't in the mood to fight. I was tired. I went upstairs and changed. Buhle walked into my room crying with her blanky and I knew she wanted to sleep. I put her to sleep and went to lay on my bed. I was bored so I created an Instagram account. I followed MaDlamini but that was it. I liked a couple of her posts and then people caught on. I started getting hundreds of followers. Hundreds that turned into thousands really quickly. I didn't even post anything yet. I just used one of my wedding photos as a profile picture. "Did you create an Instagram account?" MaDlamini stormed into my room. I just nodded. "Finally! What are you going to post?" I just shrugged. "Nothing for now." She just rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Be boring if you want to." I put on the tv and we watched a movie. "So this is where you two are hiding. I've been calling out to you the whole time." I forced my eyes open. Moses was at the foot of the bed. I didn't even realize I fell asleep. "Come, dinner is ready." Nozipho groaned but got up anyway. "You coming?" I just nodded. He put his hand out for me and seemed surprised when I took it. He helped me up and I went to my bathroom to wash my face. He was still there when I came out so I followed him down to the dining room. We were eating in peaceful silence when Ma decided to ruin it. "So, I can confidently say that MaZulu and I had a breakthrough today?" What was she talking about? "Oh, that's good. I would really like to see the two of you mend your relationship." Moses really could fall for any bullshit that came out of his mother's mouth. "Moses don't be fooled." MaDlamini interrupted. "There is as no breakthrough. Ma attacked MaZulu because she was wearing pants in her own home. She was being unreasonable, and the only reason MaZulu did as she said is because she's exhausted. We're all exhausted of having to deal with the elders ruining our marriage." She hasn't spoken like this in a while and the fact that she was defending me really solidified our relationship. "We can all see that you and MaZulu still haven't worked through losing a child. I know Fikile meant well by sending the ultrasound but it opened old wounds and ma is too dense to see that. She took it as an opportunity to gain control over MaZulu again. Moses if you don't open your eyes you're going to loose everything again. Stop letting history repeat itself." I could see it was weighing heavily on her heart. She was also not okay. None of us were okay. "Every single time I think you've change. Everytime I think I've changed. Ma if you continue to hurt my wives I'm going to have to ask you not to come back here. This is their home where they are supposed to feel safe. I keep thinking I've gotten over this Mama's boy stage of mine then I fall back into it. You just keep on lying and lying to the point where you've started to believe your own lies. Why don't you want to see me happy?" "Moses what do you mean? I'm your mother. Obviously I want to see you happy." I can't imagine what Moses's life is as like before all of this. This woman was a master manipulator. Dinner was finished at that point. Nobody wanted to carry on eating. I was making Buhle her bottle and making myself tea. I heard someone clearing their throat and looked up to find Moses. "Can I take a seat?" I just shrugged. "It's your house." I said scooping the powder into the bottle. "Zethu come on." I could hear the hurt in his voice and I felt a little bit guilty. "Fine, do you want some tea?" He nodded excitedly. I made our tea and left Buhle's bottle to cool. "I know we aren't on good terms but I'm worried about you." I took a sip of my tea and we sat in silence. "Don't you dare go in there!" We heard Nozipho yell. Ma came storming in and started shouting at Moses about us treating her badly. "You're a witch! Both of you are! You've given my son love potion!" Moses jumped out of his seat and kept her back. "Ma, what's wrong with you?! What have any of us ever done to deserve the treatment we get from you?!" I was so done. I couldn't deal with this anymore. "Shut up! Shut! Up! I don't give a damn about you or Nozipho! I pushed your marriage because I hated MaDlamini! You're nothing to me! The both of you are nothing to me! The only reason why I made sure you and Moses got married after you lost the baby was because you have royal blood but you're useless! You couldn't even carry a child long enough for it to kick! And just like Nozipho you probably would've failed in producing an heir! You're useless both of you!" "What the hell!" Noah, Moses brother, and his wife, Nomzamo, walked in. "Moses, don't just stand there!" 53 "Ma, pack your bags and leave." Moses said calmly. "No." She replied. "Leave ma. If I have to ask again I'll have security escort you out. Leave." I was standing there shaking like a helpless puppy. In the beginning I thought I was playing them. I thought I had them fooled and it turns out I was just a pawn in someone else's game. "Moses, you can't throw me out. I'm your mother." I started to walk away because I didn't want to hear what she would have to say. I have to admit that I was scared Moses would take her back. I was terrified of that. "Mamakhe, please." I couldn't keep it in anymore. I started crying. "Mamakhe." He grabbed me and hugged me. "She's gone. She's gone. I'm never going to let anyone hurt you again. I promise and this time I'm keeping my promise." I held onto his shirt for dear life. "Come, let's go." He walked me up to my room and tucked me into bed. He switched the light off but I didn't want him to leave. "Please stay." I felt stupid. For some reason I was scared. I didn't want him to leave. "What?" He sounded shocked. "Stay." I repeated and he didn't hesitate. He got in bed with me and held me. "Tighter. Hold me tighter." He did as I said and my racing heartbeat finally slowed down. He held onto me the whole night and even though I didn't sleep at all I felt safe for the first time in forever. "Good morning, Mamakhe. You didn't sleep at all last night. Are you going to sleep in?" I shook my head. "Thank you." I said looking up at him. I couldn't help it. I was in love with this man. Even after everything I was still in love with him. "For what?" He looked confused. "For staying with me." He placed a kiss on my forehead. "Thank you for letting me stay." We eventually got out of bed and got ready for the day. I hid the bags under my eyes with some makeup because his brother was still here. "Mamakhe, are you done? Breakfast is about to be served." I nodded and walked downstairs with him. During breakfast Noah kept on appologising for their mother but I didn't really care. "The reason we came here was to share some good news. I'm expanding the supermarket. We've got two new locations and we're starting to build next month. The farms are thriving and I've just managed to aquire more land. It's not a lot but I got it for next to nothing." Everyone was happy and congratulated him. After breakfast I made myself scarce. I didn't want to deal with people. Especially after what those people saw the day before. "MaZulu! MaZulu I know you're in here!" I was sitting in a corner in my closet. I didn't feel like dealing with Nozipho. She always wants me to talk about my emotions. It was starting to get irritating. "Really?" I heard when my closet door went open. "This is what we do now? We sit in closets? Come on. Moses and Noah started a fire and Nomzamo is in the kitchen trying to make salads to go with the meat. She can't find anything and you know I never step foot in the kitchen so I don't know where anything is either." I was trying to figure out if they needed my help or if she was just trying to get me out of my room. "Where's the maid?" She rolled her eyes at me. "Really? This is what you want to do with the rest of your life? Sit in a closet and mope around?" I rolled my eyes but got up anyway. "What is she looking for?" She smiled and tried to hide it. "I don't know. Bowls, vegetables probably, I stopped listening after I heard something about potatoes. You know I have no interest in these sorts of things." I joined them in the kitchen and helped Nomzamo make a whole bunch of sides and salads that nobody was going eat. "MaZulu, how did you and Moses meet?" She asked after telling the romantic story of her love life. Apparently she met Noah in highschool and he used to write her poems. They got married right afterwards. "We met at my old job." I said because I was not in the mood for this. "There has to be more to it. Come on, don't hold back." I just shrugged. "We met at my old job, I was a waitress. He was there late and my boss told me to get rid of him. Now we're here in his house making him salads." I didn't mean to sound rude it just came out that way. I could tell I hurt her feelings and she was only trying to be nice. "You should've left me in the closet." I told MaDlamini and stormed off to the wine cellar. I grabbed a bottle and went up to my room. I sat on the floor and drank it. "MaZulu, will you be joining..." Moses stopped talking when he saw me on the floor trying to suck the last drop of wine out of the bottle. "Moses!" I yelled joyfully. I was drunk and everything was funny to me. "Did you know if your mother didn't insist on the wedding I wouldn't have been here right now?" I said trying to get up but failing. "Mamakhe this needs to stop." I laughed at him. "Why? Because you said so? Well I like it. Moses?" He just hummed in response. "You should've left me there." He finally came to help me up. "Where Mamakhe?" I sat on the bed and held his hands. "In that shack. The minute your mother came to get you you should've left me there. You should've left me there to die. My whole life I knew I would probably end up starving to death in the shack. You should've let me." He was looking me up and down almost like he didn't recognize me. "I think about it all the time now." "What?" "Dying. I'm not supposed to be here Moses. I'm only here because your mother hated your wife. Your actual wife. The one that knows about business, fashion, the one that went through so much bullshit just so you can have children. I'm not supposed to be here Moses. I'm supposed to be rotting in that shack where nobody would ever find me because the smell of my rotting corpse would just blend in with all the other bad smells. You should've left me there to die. I wish you left me there to die." "Mamakhe, no. Please don't say all of this. You're exactly where you're supposed to be." I shook my head and wiped his tears after he fell to his knees. "Don't cry. I don't like seeing you cry. I want you to be happy. You'll be happy when I'm gone." "Mamakhe stop. Please stop." He cried in with his face in my lap. "Shh, don't cry. Don't cry Moses. I'll be fine. You'll be fine." "Why are you talking like this?" I could feel it. I was starting to see stars. "Because I'm going home. I'm going. Make sure you Buhle and Sicelo know how much I love them." His head jerked up. "Mamakhe what did you do?!" "I love you, Baba." I was slowly slipping away. "Zethu! What did you take?! Answer me!" "I love you but I wasn't meant to be here. I wasn't meant to be happy. Promise me you'll be happy, Baba." "Zethu, please!" I laid down on the bed. My eyes were becoming heavy. "Zethu, what did you take!? Someone call an ambulance! Help!" I heard heavy footsteps running to my door. "Mamakhe, please. Please, I'm begging you. Stay with me. Don't just stand there! Call a damn ambulance!" "Baba." "Mamakhe." "I love you." "I love you too. Please stay with me. Keep your eyes open. Please Mamakhe I'm begging you. Please! Zethu! Keep your eyes open! Please keep them open!" "I love you." I said and everything faded to black. 54 "Doctor! Her eyes are opening!" I heard Moses yell. Wait. Moses? I opened my eyes fully to see white walls. "Mamakhe?" Moses was standing over me with a sad smile. "You're awake." Tears were running down his face. I was so confused. Was this a dream? What was I still doing here? "Hi, I'm doctor Smith. I've been treating you here at Mercy Hospital. Can you tell me your full name?" The doctor was shining some sort of light in my eyes. "Ziphozethu Zulu." I replied but my voice barely came out. "That's good. Do you know who this man is?" I nodded. "My husband." I said but I was still confused. I was not supposed to be here. I made sure of it. "Can you tell me his name?" The doctor asked and I looked at Moses and then at her. "Moses Gumede." She nodded. "Good." She was being awfully cheerful. "Mrs Gumede you've suffered a..." I stopped listening and blocked her out. I was still here. I was still here. Why? "Mrs Gumede? Mrs Gumede did you hear me?" I snapped out of it and looked up at the doctor. I just nodded. I had no idea what was going on but even listening felt like a lot of work. "Mamakhe, you're going home tomorrow. I'm taking you home and I'm going to look after you myself. We're going to get through this okay." He was crying. I didn't want him to cry. He'd be happy without me. He'd be free. He's life would go back to normal. Why was he crying? "Why are you crying?" He quickly wiped his tears. "Sorry. I didn't know." He cleared his throat. "Mamakhe." It was as if I had lost all communication skills. There was an awkward pause until he cleared his throat again. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you felt the need to do this." I just let him be. He held onto my hand way too tight but I didn't want to upset him anymore than he already was. The next day MaDlamini came and helped me get dressed in the clothes she brought me. She was quiet and she looked like she was going to burst into tears at any moment. I signed the papers and we left. The drive home was silent. I sat in the back with MaDlamini and Moses drove back home. The house was empty. Not even Buhle was around. There's was no staff except for one security guard at the gate. "Where's everyone?" I asked before walking up the stairs. "Um, I gave the staff time off." Moses sounded so weak and it made me feel guilty. Why did I do what I did? I could've just lived with it and everyone would've been fine. I went upstairs to my room to take a bath. When I got there the taps had been removed. I checked if the shower worked and it did so I took a shower. I was looking for a razer but didn't find one anywhere. I dried off anyway and went into my closet. All my railings were gone and all my clothes were folded. There were no hangers in sight. I knew exactly what this was about. I got dressed and checked the rest of my room. My headboard and side tables were gone. My window was completely sealed and anything with a pointy tip was removed. For the next week I was on suicide watch. MaDlamini spent all of her time at home. She gave me my medication, made sure I got dressed even though I had nowhere to go, she did my hair everyday, she insisted of doing my nails and I was getting extremely annoyed with them being in my face twenty four seven. Moses was going absolutely insane. He had the pool drained claiming he wanted to renovate it. Our balconies were sealed off. He even locked some of the rooms that were upstairs so I couldn't access them. He didn't talk much. He was in a constant state of panic. He followed me around and I let him. I wanted to cook so I went to the kitchen with my "shadow". I couldn't find any knives. "This is getting out of hand. Moses! I know you're there!? Where are the knives!?" He walked into the kitchen awkwardly followed by MaDlamini. "Um, they should be around." He lied. "Moses, don't lie to me." He just stood there awkwardly avoiding eye contact. "Okay, if I don't do something with myself I'm going to go crazy. I used to like cooking, I really want to start cooking again but I can't because you've removed everything in this house that has a sharp point!" I didn't mean to yell. I was just extremely frustrated. They just stood there awkwardly. "Fine, you can give me one knife of my choosing just so I can cook something and I promise not to try and kill myself again." They looked scared. Extremely scared and I knew I did that to them. "Fine. Sorry for asking." I let it go and started to walk out the room. "How about a knife of my choosing and I stay and watch the whole time." He still looked a bit nervous but I nodded. Moses got me the smallest knife he could find but I didn't mind. I cooked, and cooked, and cooked, and cooked. That's all I could do. That's the only thing that distracted me from the numbness and the chaos that's happened in my brain. I was out jogging with MaDlamini because I didn't feel like staying in my room the whole day again. "So, when are you going to start therapy? You can't just cook and run the whole day. Moses is too scared to bring it up but we all know you need to go to therapy. All of us need to go to therapy." I just sighed. "I already told Moses that I'm not going. You can forget about it." "Fine. I can't force you but if ever it gets too much and you need to talk, I'm here." I just nodded and we ran back to the house. "Mamakhe, Noah and Nomzamo want to visit. They're in the city because Noah has meetings. Can they come?" I was confused as to why he would ask me. "Why are you asking me?" He cleared his throat awkwardly. "They're worried about you. The last time they were here..." He cleared his throat again to hide the fact that his voice cracked. "It's fine. They can come." I said quickly and got back to my i- pad. Nomzamo and Noah came and we all had lunch together. I wasn't really listening to the conversation but I stayed with the group so that I didn't scare anyone. "MaZulu, I cannot believe this." Everyone seemed to be laughing at something. I was extremely confused about what Noah "couldn't believe". I just waited for him to carry on. "My brother, Moses Gumede, lived in a shack and used public transport." Oh, okay. I really missed a whole entire conversation. "He used to clean too." Everyone at the table was in utter disbelief. "I was trying to impress her. She would go to work and have to deal with annoying customers the whole day and then she'd have to come home and cook for me. So I just cleaned up a little. It worked though. She married me." I just smiled. Yep, I married him, and fell in love with him. And I wished we could go back to the way things were. 55 When they left it felt like I could breathe again. Sitting there smiling and laughing took so much energy. I needed to escape. "MaZulu? MaZulu!" I was sitting on the floor up against my bed so Nozipho couldn't see me. "Yep, I'm right here." She ran to my side of the bed and let out a breath of relief when she saw me. "Okay, you're here." She was completely out of breath and she look terrified. "Are you okay?" She nodded. "Moses came in here and said you weren't here. We looked all over the house and we couldn't find you. Didn't you hear us calling?" I shook my head. "MaZulu, it's morning. Where have you been?" I owed them an explanation even though I didn't want to. "I slept under the bed." I felt like a child explaining what happened to their parent about where I've been all night. "Why?" That feeling was coming back. My chest felt tight and with each breath it felt like I was getting less and less air. "Um..." My voice was shaking and my eyes started to tear up. "I couldn't breathe." I felt a sharp pain in my chest. "Tight spaces help." She sat down next to me. "Do you feel that way now?" I nodded grabbing onto my chest. "Okay, turn around. I'm going to hold you okay." I did as she said. I turn d with my back to her and she held onto me tightly. "Breathe with me. Come on. In and out. In and out." I copied her. "Did you..." It was Moses. I couldn't even look at him. I was too embarrassed. They were probably up all night worried about me and I was sleeping under my bed. I closed my eyes tightly hoping that the world would swallow me. "Zethu, come on. Breath. Breath with me Zethu. In and out. As easy as that. Try. Just try." I couldn't. My ears started ringing and my head started aching. "Come on." She was begging me but I couldn't and I didn't know why. The burning sensation in my lungs felt good. "Moses." I heard her whisper. "Mamakhe, open your eye. Open your eyes Mamakhe." I was too embarrassed. I couldn't. He held my hands. "Come on. I know you can. You're one of the strongest people I know. You can do this. We're here to help you. Please let us help you." I opened my eyes slowly. "There you go. Now follow me. Breathe in and out. That's the only thing you have to focus on. In and out. Come on. We've got you." I slowly started copying him until I was breathing properly. "There you go. Do you want me to let go?" I shook my head. "Okay, I've got you. I've got you okay." I nodded. I spent the rest of the day hiding in my room from embarrassment. "MaZulu you need to eat. Come on." I stayed in my bed. I didn't want to burden them anymore than needed. I heard murmurs and then my key fell out of the lock and the lock turned. "MaZulu." It was Moses. I turned around to face the other way. I heard the door shut and he got in bed with me. "I love you." I started crying quietly. "Mamakhe, please." The hurt in his voice was too much for me to handle. I turned around and he didn't hesitate to hold me. "I'm sorry." I said and cried into his chest. "No, Mamakhe. You don't need to apologize." I couldn't help it. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I don't know why I did it. I'm sorry." I held onto his shirt tightly. "Shh, Mamakhe. Shh. I'm here. I'm here for you my love. For anything at anytime of day. I love you." He's voice was so soothing. "I love you too. I love you." The next few days it was like they were walking on eggshells around me. I watched tv the whole time and I watched where they could see me. They were walking up and down and taking turns to check up on me. By the end of the week I was getting slightly annoyed but I also had to remind myself that these people loved me and they were worried about me. I saw Moses doing his rounds and I couldn't take it anymore. "Moses!" I called out to him. He looked nervous but I didn't want to scare. "You called?" He asked nervously. "Come watch tv with me." He blinked rapidly. "Me?" He asked and I nodded. The smile on his face made me smile. He sat next to me and I rested my head on his shoulder. His body was so stiff so I decided to hold his hand and he relaxed. We sat there and held hands until we fell asleep. The next couple of days Nozipho went back to work and Moses and I spent our days together. I was hoping we could get back to what we once we're. "Guess who's back home!" Nozipho came in with Buhle on her hip. Buhle squealed and ran to me when her mother put her down. "Mama!" I hugged her tightly and she laid her head in my neck. "I've missed you baby." She giggled. "Wuv you." She said and kisses me. "I love you too." "MaZulu, this is my mother, Nolitha. Ma this is MaZulu." I stood up and shook hands with her. She was dressed in a matching yellow set. It was my first time meeting her but she looked like the snobby rich aunt type. "Nice to finally meet you, MaZulu. Moses." She said and looked him up and down. "Ma." He said awkwardly. "My daughter has invited me to stay the night. Do you have a problem with that?" She side eyed him. "Not at all. I'm glad you've come to visit." She just hummed in response and we sat down for dinner. Even though Buhle could feed herself she wanted me to feed her and I didn't mind at all. "You're spoiling her again." MaDlamini warned. "Can you blame me? Just look at her. She's perfect." She smiled showing the few teeth she had. I gave Buhle her bath and put her to bed. I was in my room rubbing lotion all over my body when Moses walked in. "If I'd known Buhle would make you this happy, I would've told MaDlamini to go and get her sooner." I held onto his hand. "Buhle is not the only reason why I'm so happy." The next morning I went jogging with MaDlamini. When we got back to the house we were all over the internet again. Someone had taken pictures of us. "Do these people not get bored?" I was extremely annoyed. "Even at five in the morning with no makeup these two women are absolutely gorgeous." A vlogger said on MaDlamini's phone. "How did they even get this 'story' out there so quick. We just got back." "You two need to stay off social media when you're trending. It's just going to end up upsetting you. Anyway, I'm having security look into this because it's a violation of privacy. Also, my mother keeps calling me. If she starts calling you just ignore her." His phone rang again and he rolled his eyes. "If this is her I'm not going to be responsible for my actions. She's blocking work calls." He looked at his phone but then answered it. "Brother, how are you doing?" He said cheerfully. His mood swings were sometimes worse than mine. "Oh, we'll have to come as well. Send me a list of what's needed." Something was wrong. I just knew it. "Moses?" MaDlamini asked concerned. She knew something was wrong too. "My grandfather passed away last night." Grandfather? More and more family members keep crawling out of the woodworks. 56 We were sitting at the table going through the list of what was needed and planning our trip. MaDlamini was crying like a baby. I guess she was close to Moses's grandfather. "Has anyone said anything about Gogo's condition? How is she holding up?" Moses just shrugged. "I have no idea. I forgot to ask." She sighed and wiped her tears. "Its a dumb question anyway. Her husband who she had been with for decades just past away and those selfish idiots by her side are probably making this time for her more unbearable than needs be." We had gotten word that all the cousins and their wives were already in the village where their grandparents lived. I don't want to say I hate them but in the weeks leading up to Moses and I's wedding I grew to dislike them very much. "Moses when can we go?" Moses just sighed. "They're depending on us for a lot. I'm sure a lot of this is not needed but let me just do all the things on this list so the family is settled and calm. These lists are extremely long but I'll have staff members and drivers pick everything up. You two just pack please. MaDlamini I know it's not your thing but dresses and head coverings please. I want to get this over and done with peacefully. And don't forget black clothes and traditional wear. I need to get to the office and then sort all of this out." I started packing for Buhle and I while MaDlamini packed for her and Moses. We coordinated our funeral outfits and took our bags downstairs. I packed all of Buhle's snacks too because we were going to be there the whole week. I wonder if this is going to be like the last time I was with their family. I became a maid and faded from Moses's memory. "I made tea and sandwiches. You should eat something." I placed MaDlamini's food infront of her. "Thank you." She took a sip of her tea. "I feel dumb. He was old and sick. He could've died at anytime. I shouldn't be this upset." It seemed like she was talking to herself. "You probably think I'm crazy." I shook my head. "No, I don't. Someone who you loved dearly just died. You're allowed to be upset no matter how old or sick the person was." She sighed. "They're the only people in this family who were on my side. It's Moses grandparents on his dad's side. When Ma thought I was acting up she sent me to Gogo. Gogo is a very strict diciplinarian. I was sent there to learn my "wifely duties" as ma liked calling it. I got there and for the first month it was torture. They don't live in a village like Ma does. With rich people, a chief, and some infrastructure. It's literally all rural and they live the traditional way. So all the chores and housework was excruciating for me. But I got to know Gogo and Baba and they got to know me. I eventually told them everything that happened and that got Ma off my back for a couple of years. I regret not going to see them more." We did more packing and we were off early the next morning. We drove in our car but had three more cars following us packed with groceries and alcohol for the ceremonies. I was nervous. I didn't know what to expect from the family this time. They hated me the last time and I don't know if I'll be strong enough for it this time. The sixteen hour drive was exhausting. Buhle was irritated and uncomfortable. We tried everything but she wouldn't budge. It was dark when we arrived but everyone was still outside. We were met with singing and dancing and all that could be seen were huts. And not the huts that we're built with brick at ma's house. Actual huts. We were sleeping in huts. "We're here. Let me help the two of you out. " Moses got the door for each of us and everyone started unpacking the cars. We first made our way to the main hut where the widow was sitting on her grass mat and blanket. Moses took the wooden chair and MaDlamini and I sat on the grass mats laid out for us. Moses said their clan praises and then addressed his grandmother. "Gogo..." She stopped him with her hand. "There's no need. In fact I'm tired of hearing everyone's condolences. Nobody was here when he was sick and all of a sudden the whole village is full of people when he dies." She sighed. "I'm sorry my boy. I didn't mean to. I know you work very hard for all of us here. How are you doing?" I kept my head down. MaRadebe may act as if she is the matriarch of this family but I was sitting in front of the true queen. "I've been fine Ma." She nodded. "Good. Who have you brought with you?" I knew she was looking at me but I kept my head bowed. "My wives Ma." He said and she cleared her throat. "Excuse me? Wait, what is going on here? Is this why everyone has been walking on eggshells when I mention your name. Wives Moses? As in multiple?" Nobody told her? Oh no. She definitely hates me. "Gogo, this is MaZulu, my sister wife." MaDlamini said. "Nozipho, what is going on? What is the meaning of this?" I could feel my breathing become shallow. MaDlamini gave me two pats on my hand. I looked at her and she was smiling. That made me feel better. "Yes, Gogo, this is Moses's second wife, Ziphozethu Zulu." There was a moment of silence before I heard a sigh. "MaZulu." "Yebo, Ma." "It's nice to meet you and to think I would've never met you if my husband hadn't died." I was a bit shocked by her honesty but I just went with it. "It's nice to meet you too Ma. Even if it is under these circumstances." She just hummed in response. "Anyway, Moses your mother hasn't arrived yet. Noah said she would be coming. I don't like anyone here and you know this." I fought my laugh. "I have forbidden everyone from sitting and mourning with me because I've been waiting for Nozipho. Is it okay if she stays with me this week?" She asked Moses and he nodded. "Of course she can." He responded. "I was worried that it might be a problem because you're sleeping alone but since there's another wife in the picture your bed won't be cold." She really didn't like me and if it were a few months ago I would care. Maybe I did a little bit but her dislike of me didn't affect me as much as it would have. "Okay, one of the wives can lead you to your hut. If MaZulu needs someone to prepare it for her she can just ask one of the more traditional wives." Oh wow. Damn! Okay. She was throwing subtle jabs in every direction. "MaZulu is more than capable of preparing our hut but thank you for the offer Gogo." Moses replied and I could tell he was biting his tongue. Also, he almost never defends me when it comes to his family so this was kind of, dare I say it, kind of hot. We were shown our hut and I cleaned and brought our bags in. "At least there's a mattress. I thought we were going to have to sleep on grass mats." I laughed a little. Moses seemed to be fine I guess. "They gave us a lot of thick blankets. The weather isn't cold enough for that yet so maybe we can lay on top of them to make the mattress thicker." He hummed in response. "MaZulu, are you okay with this?" I was confused. "What do you mean?" He walked over to me and took my hand in his. "We haven't really shared a bed on a regular basis. We'll probably be together the whole week." I looked away shyly. "There you go with that look again. It drives me crazy." I bit my lip. "Sorry." I whispered. "No need to appologize. "On a more serious note. MaZulu I promised to protect you and I'm keeping my promise this time but I need you to promise me one thing too." I looked up at him. "What's that?" He kissed my hand. "I need you to promise to tell me when you're not okay. You know I tend to go blank and not notice things when I'm around my family. So I need you to tell me. Please." I nodded. "Okay, I promise to tell you if anything is wrong." "Good. This is going to be a really long week but we'll get through it." 57 Our 'very long week' started the next day. The wives were extremely irritated by my presence. I was making tea when one of them approached me. "Here." She threw a bag of maize meal at my feet. "You'll be making pap for everyone this morning, Princess. Hurry up. Our husbands and children are about to wake up." Through me starting the fire and boiling water I saw the village people come out and watch me but now the crowd grew. I served the tea and Moses helped me with the big pot. It was huge. I would surely need help stirring this cauldron but I knew I wouldn't get any. The crowd that was gathering looked amused. I was wearing my apron and doek but it was clear that I was from the city. They probably thought I couldn't handle this but now I was even more determined. I got two extra long wooden spoons and waited for my water to boil before adding in my maize meal. I got both spoon and stirred the pap so there would be no clots. I found my rhythm with the two spoons pretty quickly and although I have t do e hard work in some time it was still familiar to my body. The crowd was amazed but I ignored them. I even ignored the women who looked at me with daggers in their eyes. The men started getting up and I dished while they distributed to their husbands. Everyone got their plate and couldn't stop raving about the porridge which drove the women mad. "Well, MaZulu one, Moses's terrible family zero." MaDlamini said softly and we gave each other a fist bump. "Ma, can we have some too." A kid from the village asked with his bowl ready. I have was about to say yes when one of the wives jumped in. "Hey! You've been bothering us since we got here! Get away! Go eat at home!" The kids screamed and ran away. "Was that necessary? There's more than enough and it's going to go to waste! What's wrong with you?!" I couldn't bite my tongue. Why would she do that to a child? "MaDlamini, could you please bring me more plates so I can dish for those children?" Nozipho smiled. "Of course." "You will do no such thing!" If this was a cartoon steam would be coming out of her ears. "And who's going to stop us? MaZulu I recall our husband buying all the groceries for the week. Do you remember that?" MaDlamini asked me. "Yes, I do. MaDlamini, I think that since our husband bought it and I made it, we can give it to whomever we want." I played along. "I think so too. Let me go get those plates." There was silence among everyone while MaDlamini got the plates. We dished the porridge and fed most of the village. It really wasn't a lot of people and we had more than enough. There was no need for her to be acting the way she did. I went back into the hut to hide because I knew I would be feeling their rath soon enough. Moses was there laying on our makeshift bed and he didn't look well. "Baba?" I was scared. He never just lays down. "Don't look so worried. It's just my back." I didn't know what to do. "Um, okay. Let me go and ask MaDlamini if she has any pain medication." He just nodded. MaDlamini was sitting with Gogo. "Gogo. MaDlamini." I acknowledged them and sat down. "Yebo, MaZulu." Gogo said and I cleared my throat. "I just came to ask MaDlamini if she didn't have any pain medication. Baba is having problems with his back." I said keeping my head bowed. "Yes, I do. I knew this would happen. He refuses to use the blowup mattress we brought with us." She went to her bags. "MaZulu, what was happening today at breakfast?" I didn't know what to say. Should I tell her? Will that make me look like a snitch? Snitches get stitches remember. "Nothing really Gogo. There's was just a small misunderstanding about breakfast." "A small misunderstanding?!" I gave Nozipho a look so she would let it go. "No, don't look at me like that. They were being complete bitches. First they made you make breakfast alone. For everyone. And then they wanted to scold you for giving breakfast to the other kids around the village." "Nozipho." I was pleading for her to let it go. "Don't 'Nozipho' me. I'm only telling the truth." Just then the main bitch walked in. "Since the two of you made it so clear that your husband bought the food and it's up to you to decide how it gets used, you will be doing the cooking. We don't want to step on anyone's toes." She said and left immediately laughing all the way to her hut. "Told you. They're bitches." Nozipho said shaking her head and Gogo laughed to herself. How was I supposed to cook every meal for all of these people. "Here, they're not strong but it's all I have." She handed me the pills. "MaDlamini, look in that cabinet there should be some ointment in there that MaZulu can use for Moses's back." She looked for the ointment and Gogo cleared her throat loudly. "So, MaZulu what are you going to do about meals? More people are arriving tomorrow." This whole thing was crazy and unessasary. "I don't know but I'll work it out." I replied and she just hummed in response. "Judging from just your pap making skills I know whatever you're going to cook is going to be better than the greasy food they've been giving me. I haven't eaten properly in days." I bit my lips to stop my laugh. "Is she always this quiet MaDlamini?" Nozipho nodded. "Yep, she's very shy and probably scared of you." My eyes widened at MaDlamini. "You know the people of the village aren't used to this. We all usually eat and cook together because we're so few and live so close. These children came and chased them away. I'm sure they're not eating properly and they're very unhappy because they're not being allowed to mourn with us. They saw my husband everyday. He was their father and now all of you have swooped in and replaced them." I got the ointment and went to our hut. "Mamakhe, did you bring my snacks that I put one side. I saw them preparing dinner and I do not want it." I laughed but got his snacks so he could eat something. "MaDlamini gave me these pills and Gogo said I should rub this ointment on your back." He pat the bed and I sat down with him. "How have you been?" I sighed and he took my hand in his. "If I tell you do you promise not to do anything. I don't need your help this time." He rolled his eyes playfully. "Fine." He said like a stubborn child. "The other wives are getting on my nerves. After Nozipho and I had an argument with them over giving the village kids the rest of the porridge they decided they won't cook anymore. Nozipho and I might've been wrong for saying what we said to them." He looked at me suspiciously. "MaZulu, what did you say?" I bit my lip. "MaZulu." I sighed heavily. "Okay, but first you need to know that they were really rude to a child and refused to give the people from the village food. Nozipho and I might've said something along the lines of you bought the food so we could give it to whoever we want." He chuckled. "I can't even blame you. So now you have to cook?" I just nodded. "Don't get me wrong. I don't want you to be working like a slave but at least the food will be edible." Both of us laughed. 58 The next morning I was up before sunrise. I started a fire and began prepping vegtables for the day. I saw a light from Gogo's hut and she came outside. "Morning Gogo." I said prepping everyones cups for tea. "Morning. You're up early. The sun is not even out yet. I brought you an extra candle." I thanked her and started on my carrots. I had to pots of water boiling. A smaller one for tea and a big one for pap. She left me to it. The villagers started waking up and one of them was walking towards me. "Morning sisi. I was sent to say thank you for yesterday." She said. She seemed older than me but she was extremely shy. "There's no need to thank me. I was just doing the neighborly thing. We had more than enough." She smiled. "I see you're up extra early." She said looking at the vegtables. "Yes, I've been given the cooking duties." I said and checked on the water. "Oh? Alone?" I nodded. "Is it because of yesterday?" I didn't want to answer. I didn't need her to feel bad. "What if I go get a few ladies and we help you?" Her face lit up as she asked. "Really? You'd do that?" she nodded and ran away excitedly. She came back with a group of women. They were all carrying crates and trays. They set up a long station for us to work at. They introduced themselves and we got to work. The ladies sitting by the crates were pealing and cutting vegtables and a couple of us were making porridge for breakfast. People started waking up and I served tea. Moses was still in the hut so I took a cup and went to him. "Baba." He opened his eyes and smiled. "Good morning." I said and he sat up. "I brought tea." I could see he looked uncomfortable. "Morning Mamakhe. Where are those tablets?" I got it for him but I was still worried. "How's your back?" He took a sip of his tea. "Not as bad as yesterday. How's the cooking? I'm hungry." I couldn't help but giggle. "The cooking is going well. The ladies from the village are helping me." He looked surprised. "What? Yesterday they wouldn't even allow us to get water and they're helping you?" I nodded. "You're amazing. Do you know that? You're amazing." He came closer to me as if he wanted to kiss me but he stopped himself. We sat there awkwardly with our faces just inches apart. "What are all of you doing here?! Where's MaZulu?! MaZulu! MaZulu!" I heard my name being yelled. "I need to go." He sighed but I left because I didn't want to see the look of disappointment on his face. "Yes! Here I am! What's the problem?!" She pushed my shoulder and I almost fell back. "You lazy bitch! Did you really think you could give your chores to these people and I would just allow it?! Do you think it's right that your family eats food from strangers?! The same strangers who wouldn't allow us to get water the other day. What if they poisoned the food?!" She pushed my head with her finger. "You stupid bitch!" Moses and Nozipho came running out and she took it as an opportunity to jump on me. She got one punch in and they pulled her off. "Sizwe! Sizwe come get your wife!" Moses yelled for her husband I was crying silently in Moses's arms. "What is going on out here!" I heard Gogo's voice. "Baba, take me away." I whisper and he walked me back to our hut. "Mamakhe, your nose is bleeding." He got me a tissue. I held my nose and cried into his chest. "MaZulu?" It was Gogo. "Is she okay?" Moses just nodded. "MaZulu!" Nozipho came running in. "Let me see your face." Moses let me go. "I didn't do anything." My voice was shaking and I started crying again. I felt stupid. "Come let's go to the big hut." We all followed Gogo. "Moses." "Sizwe, I don't have time for you and your wife right now. Leave us alone." He said sternly. I sat down and Gogo looked at my face. "This is why the elders should've been here. I don't know why they decided to send their kids alone. That woman has been on a power trip since she set foot here and the others have been following her like sheep. Here, drink this. It's tea. It should calm you down." "Mama." Buhle woke up. She took one look at me and started crying. The blood from my nose probably scared her because she wouldn't come to me. "Sawubona Gogo. Breakfast is almost ready and the women want to know if we should continue with the food." The lady who helped me this morning asked and Gogo went out with her. "I need to wash my face." I got water and washed myself and went back out to the ladies. I dished for Moses and found him in the hut. "I didn't feel like eating with everyone else after what happened." I sat down to eat with him. "Moses." He hummed in response. "I love you." He looked worried. "I love you too but what's going on? Are you having... You know... Thoughts..." I shook my head. "No. I just wanted you to know that I love you." He still looked a bit worried. "I love you too." After breakfast I went back outside and cooked with the ladies. We sang and told stories. We were having an amazing time and everyone was enjoying the food. The kids were playing and the men were planing all the traditions that go with a funeral since the elders were taking too long. That night they were having a meeting and planning to go into the city. I took a bath and got ready for bed. Gogo gave us an extra mattress so Moses could sleep better so I made the bed. Moses was taking took long so I decided to get under the covers. When he came back he prepared his water and took a bath as well. I couldn't help but stare. I felt like a weirdo but I missed him and I missed sex. When he finally came to bed he smelled so good that I couldn't help it. "Moses." He hummed in response. He sounded tired but I needed him. I got on top of him and started kissing his neck. He smacked my ass and turned us around quickly and started kissing me. I don't know what came over him but he tore my dress open and groaned. "Oh, I've missed you Mamakhe." He started sucking and bitting in my nipples and it drove me crazy. "Mm. Baba please." I begged. "Be patient." He pulled on my nipple with his teeth and it sent shivers down my spine. Before I knew it I heard my underwear rip. Moses groaned and I opened my legs wider. "I can't believe all of this is mine." He said before he started licking my pussy. "Baba." I moaned and clutched my mouth closed. We were too close to the other huts for me to be moaning like that. "Shh baby." He said and blew on my clit. It was driving me crazy and I had to stop him immediately. I sat up and held onto his head. "Do you want me to stop?" I sighed. I needed it. I was so horny but I didn't want to embarrass us more. "If you don't stop I'm going to be moaning so loud the whole village is going to hear me. I want you. No, I need you but not here." He groaned. "Mamakhe please. Look how wet you are baby. Come on." He put a finger in my and I bit in my lips. I buried my head in his neck as he added another finger. I was fighting my moans trying to keep quiet. All that could be heard was my panting and sloshing between my legs. "You're so tight Mamakhe." I was so close. So so close and then he stopped. We kissed and he let us lay back. "You have to stay quiet okay." I nodded my chest was moving up and down rapidly. He pulled his pants down and pulled the blanket over us. I blew out the candle next to me and all that could be heard was the sound of nature outside. I moaned softly when he slid inside me. "Shh." I buried my head in his neck again to muffle the sound of my panting. He thrusted slowly and I loved the pace. He started panting too. I was on the verge of cumming and he knew that. "Baba." I whispered as my legs started shaking. "Wait for me Mamakhe. Hold it baby. Hold it." It was torture but it felt so good. "Let go." He said and we both came. My whole body shook and I saw stars. Moses body was stiff against mine as he came in me and I enjoyed every second of it. The tension finally left our bodies and we were breathing heavily. We started kissing as we came down from our high. "I missed you so much." 1 "I missed you too." 59 The next morning Moses and I were eating breakfast with Buhle when cars pulled up. "Look who finally decided to show up." He said drinking his tea. The elders got out of their cars and walked straight into the main hut. "This can't be good." Moses just sighed. We seemed to be doing a lot of that lately. "This funeral is going to make everyone miserable." He said and I scoffed. "Where have you been the past couple of days? Everyone is already miserable." Both of us laughed. MaDlamini came out of the hut rolling her eyes. She put her grass mat down and sat with us. "This is going to be a long week." She said folding her eyes. "It's already been a long week. I'm not involving myself in anything. Im just here because I have to be. Now that the elders are here this should be moving along Swiftly." "Swiftly Moses? For you yes but MaZulu and I have targets on our back. It's only a matter of time before they try and attack me too." I wouldn't be surprised if they did. "I don't understand why they hate us so much. I didn't do anything to them." "You married rich. That's what you did to them. Their husbands are useless leaches. Moses and Noah pays this whole family's bills." I was shocked. "MaDlamini lower your voice." She rolled her eyes. "Fine, but it's true. Noah owns a few farms and Moses is in the mining and development sector and all of them feel entitled to it. Some of them work at the farms and mines and Moses supplements their salaries from his own pocket. They should be worshipping the ground we walk on but as a thank you we get punched in the face." I looked at Moses in shock. "What the hell?" I asked him and he avoided eye contact. "Moses." He just shrugged. "What? I can't just stop it now. They're dependant on it. Don't look at me like that." I was kind of disappointed. "All of this and we still get treated like shit. I'm not saying you shouldn't give your family money especially if you just have it but they've turned into spoilt entitled brats." Someone called Moses and he made us come with him. "So, the reason we took so long was because we were working on logistical issues. I made a picture book for ma so she can see everything we chose. From the coffin to the food and the priest, the tents, chairs, decor, ect. You should look at the book too. All the invoices are there." MaRadebe said. Moses looked at the book. "Okay who's paying for this? The coffin alone is fifty thousand rand." My eyes went wide. "Well Moses that's why we called you in here. You'll be paying for it." He scoffed at his mother. "Moses when your dad died your grandfather raised you. This is the least you could do for him." She was manipulating him again. He just shut the book and left. "Don't worry. He'll pay for it. We've also got a few prestigious guest coming to the funeral. The minister of health will be coming because of Baba's work he did with traditional and modern medicine and the Minister of education will also be attending." MaRadebe said excitedly. I started getting up because I didn't want to be around her anymore. "Where are you going?" I wanted to roll my eyes so bad. "I need to go and prepare lunch." She looked at me in disgust. "You think we're going to eat your food after you made Moses kick us out of his house? You're really a piece of work aren't you? You won't be touching a pot because if it's not poison you put in it we'll choke from the hate you made it with. Now be a good princess and go sit somewhere and look pretty." I was not going to allow her to see me cry so I left. "Mamakhe?" I ignored him and got into bed. "Mamakhe talk to me." He came to sit next to me. "Don't ever leave alone in a room with them again." That woman was just pure evil. She didn't have any kind of love in her heart for anyone. Not even her own sons. She was just using them. We spent most of the day in the hut. Since I wasn't to cook anymore I just sat in my hut with Moses talking about random things. "You know what I miss?" I shook my head. "Actual breakfast." I laughed. "We haven't even been here that long for you to be "missing" food." I said laughing. "What? I can't help it. I want eggs, bacon, sausages, toast. What other breakfast food is there? I'm done eating porridge." "A burger would be awesome right now. I'm tired of stews." I said eating some of the snacks Moses took out. "A burger would be great." "You two are talking about food?! Food! Can't you hear the commotion outside!" We jumped up. Nozipho stood in the door way. "What's going on?" I asked getting up. "Well, everyone is fighting over yesterday's incident. They're convinced they won't get their money because you were punched and now they're fighting each other." Moses groaned and got up. I followed them outside. Even the men were going at it. I have no idea how we could just block this noise out and talk about burgers. "Hey! Hey! Shut up! All of you!" Moses shouted and they all stopped screaming at each other. "Stop it! You're embarrassing all of us! The leader of this family died! Your grandfather died! Act like it damnit! I know none of you have an ounce of respect left in your bodies but for this week just pretend! What's wrong with all of you?!" I know the situation was serious but Moses screaming at all of these people was hot. I looked down at my feet so I could hide the fact that I wanted to jump his bones. "Moses! Come my boy. Gogo wants to talk to you." Now it's "my boy"? This woman was so full of bullshit. Moses signaled for Nozipho and I to join him and we reluctantly walked with him. "Moses, I don't like what your mother is making you do. Just spending money on unessasary things for no reason. All of this isn't needed. We can scale down." "Gogo, it's fine. It's not that much. I would gladly do it for my grandfather." Gogo just sighed. "Okay, I get it. I know you can afford it but I don't want you to feel pressured. Everyone just keeps giving you lists and you keep spending money. It's not fair. I don't care how rich you are. You know your grandfather would've been happy with a small funeral. He wasn't one for funerals." She could see exactly what they were doing to him. They use him and then throw him away. "Gogo, I'm happy to pay for Baba's funeral. He deserves a dignified funeral." Gogo smiled at him. "Okay, but you follow this list as is. Nothing added. Okay? I don't want you spending anymore money." "Yebo, Gogo." He cleared his throat awkwardly. "I think tomorrow we'll go into town. I need a proper internet connection to sort all of this out." They discussed a few of the important things and as we got up to leave Moses's mother started drama again. "MaDlamini thank you for keeping my seat warm but I'm here now. The elders and I will be sitting with Ma." I could see that Nozipho wanted to say something but she just took a deep breath and let it go. "Excuse me MaRadebe but you already came in her and took over the planning of my husband's funeral. You forget you are only but a Makoti in my house. Your ego stops at the door. You don't rule this family. I do. Now I've allowed you to go on your power trip and make demands and throw your weight around. I hope you had fun because it's over. Just because you rule the elders with Moses's money doesn't mean you can come and call the shots on my land. You haven't seen your father-in-law for years and you knew he was sick. You didn't call, you didn't write, you didn't visit and frankly, I don't like you." My eyes went wide but I kept my head down. "So, you won't be sitting with me and mourning. None of you will be sitting with me." I heard soft gasps come from the ladies. "But Gogo it's tradition." One of the aunt's said softly. "I don't care. Just like you didn't care when my husband was sick." We left and Moses and I went to go sit in the hut. "Tomorrow we'll go into town because if I stay here any longer I'm going to explode." He said and took a seat on the chair. "Where's MaDlamini?" "Here. You said something about going into town? Why? They just installed cellphone towers the signal is fine and we did bring the portable wifi router. Anything that needs to be done can be done here." Moses did not look happy. "MaDlamini we're driving into town tomorrow. I don't care about cellphone towers and wifi routers. I'm getting out of here for the day." "Okay. I get it. This has been a lot to deal with but I want to be by Ma's side. Buhle and I will stay. The two of you can go." I found it a little bit suspicious but I couldn't say anything because once again there was commotion outside. "What is it now?" Nozipho asked annoyed. Gogo was outside screaming at people. "Is this how you live!? It's disgusting! You're filthy! People have given up their homes so all of you can live comfortably and this is what you do with it!" One of them worked up some bravery and yelled. "Why aren't you checking Moses's hut?! Why only ours?!" I rolled my eyes and stepped aside so Gogo could come in. She went into the hut and inspected it. "It's spotless! What do you have to say for yourselves now? Clean up after yourselves damnit! Not even pigs live like this!" We stood there awkwardly with people giving us death stares. "Oh wow. Are they really staring at me like that because they chose to live in filth?" "What did you say? Say it louder so everyone can hear you!" One of the wives yelled. "I said you should be embarrassed that you choose to live in your own filth!" I yelled across the way. She tried running up on me but their husbands knew better. Three of Moses's cousins were holding her back. MaDlamini laughed loudly. 1 I bit my lip to stop myself from laughing but the smile on my face was clear. "Baba when do we leave because I might get murdered here?" He shook his head also trying not to laugh. "Should MaDlamini and I prepare to be human shields because it's only a matter of time before they start swinging again." They need to calm down. Every single time we're all together they feel the need to attack us. Talk about biting the hand that feeds you. 60 That night we were served greasy slop for dinner. "Baba, I don't know if I can eat this." I said looking at my plate. "Me either. Doesn't MaDlamini still have snacks with her? This might just poison us." I went to Gogo's hut and when I walked in they quickly started hiding stuff under the blanket. I heard a lot of plastics rustling. "Can we help you." I looked at Nozipho suspiciously. "What's under the blanket?" Her eyes darted to Gogo who seemed to have a mouth full of food but her plate was off to one side. "MaDlamini if you have proper please share. We're starving." She rolled her eye. "Fine. I just know Moses sent you. Call him in here." I poked my head out the hut and signaled for Moses to come and he didn't waist any time. They had two lunch boxes full of food hidden in a plastic bag. "Gogo." Moses sounded shocked. "What? I'm not eating their food. It's terrible. One of my neighbors sneaked this in for me. Have some." We ate and they spoke about their grandfather. Moses's father died in a car accident when he was young. MaRadebe sent both Noah and Moses to live with their grandparents. Back then they had moved to the city because they worked in a hospital. Moses's grandfather as a doctor and and Gogo as a nurse. They moved to this village when their grandfather received the calling to become a traditional healer. They put all six of their sons AKA the elders, through university and then they put Moses and Noah through university. That's probably why they feel like they owe them. "Oh here she is. As lazy as ever. You're the youngest and newest wife here and you think chores are above you?" MaRadebe just knew how to ruin a moment. "Ma you said I shouldn't touch any of the food." She looked like she was enjoying every minute of this. "That doesn't mean your exempt from everything else. You can still collect wood and water and clean around here." "Ma! You do not want to get on my nerves this week! Not this week!" Moses yelled at her. "Do you see what they put me through Gogo? Do you see what I have to deal with?" She started fake crying. "This woman is crazy." Nozipho said under her breath. "Crazy? I'm crazy? If I'm crazy then the two of you are useless. The one can't give birth to a son and the other can't even stay pregnant long enough for us to find out what the child is!" What the hell was wrong with this woman. "Get out! Out!" Gogo threw a slipper at her. "Moses, look what they're doing to your mother." She said 'crying' again. "Ma, I'm only saying this once. If you don't stop talking to my wives the way you do you can stop counting on my money hitting your bank account every month." She started crying dramatically and the she ran out. The mood was ruined and it felt like I was going back into that dark place again. Everytime I thought things were getting better I would be back at square one. "MaZulu, are you still awake?" Moses asked in the middle of the night and I hummed in response. "I'm worried about you. You haven't said anything since my mother's tantrum." I sighed an held him tighter. "I'm fine. She just knows which buttons to press. Can we leave early tomorrow morning?" I was clinging onto him for dear life. "No problem. Gogo asked me to ask you to wear black because our family is in mourning. I hope it's not a problem." I shook my head. "No it's fine. I can wear black." I woke up early the next morning. I got dress in a form fitting black dress. The sleeves were long because I didn't want to deal with any of the elders but I threw a black scarf around my shoulders anyway. I tied a black scarf around my head and tied it as nice as I could. I decided to put on some light makeup while Moses was getting ready. I finished the outfit off with my black red bottom pumps. I had to admit I was trying to make a few people jealous. I packed a million black outfits but I chose this one on purpose. "MaZulu, what are you trying to do to me?" Moses hugged me from behind. "You look breathtakingly beautiful." I blushed and thanked him. Everyone was already up and having breakfast but we decided not to join them today. I got my bag and we stepped out of the hut. The murmur of breakfast turned into silence as I felt everyone's eyes on me. "Mama!" Buhle came running to me. She was followed by MaDlamini. "Good morning baby." She laid her head on my shoulders. "You two look great. Gogo just wants to see you before you leave." We followed her into the hut. "Oh don't sit down. You look so beautiful I don't want the floor to ruin your dress. Here." She handed me a suit bag and shoe box. "Drop this off at the funeral home. MaRadebe bought a new suit and my husband insisted on being buried in his favourite suit and shoes. They know the two of you are coming. Also, there's a cafe on church street that makes most amazing carrot cake. Please bring me a slice." Buhle was still tired so she didn't complain much when I left her with Nozipho. We made our way to the car with everyone staring at us. Moses let out a heavy breath as soon as we were far enough from the village. I held his hand and we drove to the neighboring town in a comfortable silence. He was in much more pain than he led on but I didn't want to pressure him. We went for breakfast at the Cafe Gogo told us about. It was a very small town and this was the only place we could get service before ten. "I'm so glad to be out of there." He sighed and leaned back in his chair. I wanted to ask him something but I didn't want to overstep. "What is it, MaZulu? I can see your brain working." I just smiled. "I'd rather not, Baba." He took my hand. "Say it. I'd rather you say it." I took a sip of my juice. "I just don't understand why they treat us like this. They owe you everything. Why are they fighting us at every corner?" He just sighed. "Well, Noah and I were lucky enough to get into university because of my grandparents connections and none of them were good in school anyway. Their parents paid for our university fees and they think we owe them. I think I owe them too. That's why I keep giving them money." This whole thing is because of university fees their parents paid? "I still don't get why they treat us the way they do." I said taking a bit of my bacon. "I think they're jealous. My grandfather had a piece of land. Those years black people couldn't own land but he had a white friend and he put it in the friend's name. Noah studied agriculture and when he came back he turned the land into a farm. I on the other hand married rich. MaDlamini got her inheritance when her grandfather died and her and Noah helped me buy a mine." It still doesn't make sense to me. Maybe they were just evil, and entitled spoiled brats. After our breakfast we got to it. We were calling everyone we needed to call and Moses transferred the money over to whoever needed to be paid. We went to the funeral home to give them the proper clothes. "Would you like to see him Mr Gumede?" Moses finally nodded and even though I didn't want to see a dead person I went with him. I didn't have a choice. He held my hand so tight I thought it would fall off. Moses viewed his grandfather's body and then we paid the funeral home and left. We took a stroll around town before we went back to the restaurant for lunch. "I think we should get dinner too. I don't know how my cousins are surviving with wives who can't cook." We laughed and had our lunch. We ordered Gogo's carrot cake and got dinner for MaDlamini and Gogo too. We got back to the village just before dinner. I got those same stares again. "How was your day?" Gogo asked. "Busy, I went to the funeral home and saw him. They said they'll make sure he's in the proper clothing." She just nodded. "We brought food and cake." He said and excused himself. "How's he doing?" MaDlamini asked. She was concerned and so was I. "Ever since the funeral home he's been very quiet." "Mama!" Buhle waddled in and sat in my lap. "Hi baby." She cuddled up to me and I held her. "Let me go check on him. I knew it would hit him at some point." "So, MaZulu..." Gogo started. "Tell me about your family." Oh Lord. How do I say this without saying it. "Um." I visibly tensed up. "What do you want to know, Gogo?" She looked at me suspiciously. "How about your parents? What are their names?" I did not want to do this but I answered anyway. "Zenandi and Zwelethu." She nodded. Buhle handed me alher blanket and bottle and I knew she was tired. "Okay, are they married?" These were totally normal questions but I was so uncomfortable. "Yes." This was true but I sounded so unsure. "I'm assuming your father's surname is Zulu. Zwelethu Zulu. Why does that sound familiar? Zwelethu Zulu. I know that name." "Yes, you do Gogo. That's my father-in-law." Veronica stepped in and went to hug her grandmother. "Sorry I couldn't make it earlier. Work has been extremely busy." She sat next to her grandmother. "Wait, did you say your father-in-law? Zwelethu Zulu. The chief?" She nodded. "I thought he only had sons." She looked so confused. "And Zethu. The only daughter." She looked at me like she was analysing every inch of my face. "What?" She looked so confused. "I know the chief. I helped him with getting a clinic set up in the village. Never has he mentioned a daughter or a wife named Zenandi." That information didn't help my mental state at all. "How did you survive with all those brothers?" It was such an innocent question but it was extremely difficult for me to answer. "My mother moved to the city when I was young so I didn't really get to see them." The smile on her face dropped. "Oh, okay." Her eyes narrowed at me as if she was thinking really hard. Luckily, she changed to topic. "What did you bring me?" She asked Veronica and I fed Buhle. She fell asleep quickly and I laid her down. I took a walk and sat on a nearby hill watching the sunset. "Mamakhe? Everything alright?" Moses came to sit next to me. "Yes. I'm okay. How about you. You've been quiet ever since we viewed your grandfather's body." He sighed. "I think it just hit me that he was gone. I hadn't seen him in years and now all of a sudden I'll never see him again." We sat in a comfortable silence until Gogo called us back because it was dark. 61 Funeral preparations were in full swing and the elders made sure all the customs and traditions were completed properly. It was a long process that didn't need to be rushed if they were here on time. MaDlamini and I were completely iced out by the whole entire family and Moses was pissed. He refused to participate in anything. He spent most of his time resting in the hut. The last few months have been rough for us all and he needed the rest. I snuck into the small outbuilding where we stored all the groceries and got a six pack of ciders. I hid it behind our hut and poured it out into a coffee mug. "MaZulu." Nozipho looked at me suspiciously. "Mm?" I was tipsy but I made sure to stay away from everyone. They were extremely busy anyway. "You've been standing around the whole entire day with this cup. I wasn't born last night. What's in it?" I just took a sip from my cup and didn't say anything. "Zethu, you can't be mixing alcohol with your medication." She said softly and grabbed cup and threw it out. "Seriously. I wasn't even mixing alcohol with medication. I haven't taken any in days and I've been fine. Stop worrying about me. I swear I won't try and kill myself again." I said sarcastically. "Again? What do you mean again? What the hell is going on in the city? Where's Moses?" Gogo walked into our hut. I let out a breath of frustration. Why did I have to say that. "I'm sorry." I said to Nozipho who looked extremely uncomfortable with the whole situation. "Here you are. Sorry we got here so last minute but at least we're in time for the funeral tomorrow." Noah said. His family followed behind him. "Oh, you finally showed up." Gogo said coming out of the hut. She hugged them and I was happy for the distraction. "I got caught up in the city and the girls were still in school." They walked off and I was left with disapproving stares from Moses and Nozipho. "I'm fine. Stop worrying. I'm not even drunk." They didn't say anything and their silence was killing me. "Fine, I'll just get ready for bed and have an early night. See you tomorrow." I prepped all our stuff for tomorrow. Got some water to wash myself and got into bed. "Mamakhe." I hummed in response. "You're scaring me." Moses said. I opened the covers for him and he got in bed with me. "Don't be. I'm fine. I won't try anything again okay." He held onto my hand tightly. "I'm sorry. I promise it was harmless fun. I was just bored." I don't think he believed me so I stayed up until he fell asleep. His alarm woke us early and we got ready for the day. The dramatics began as soon as the the casket arrived. People were crying and screaming even fainting. More and more people arrived and as soon as the rituals at the homestead were done we moved to the big white tents. Red carpets laid out the path to the front and I understood why MaDlamini had us matching in our finest clothes. News reporters and a few ministers were there. Gogo sat in the front with all her son's and their wives. Just before the service started she made them all stand up and swop with us. They were seething.Veronica, Moses and Noah got to sit infront with their families while they had to sit in the second row. The tension in the room was palpable. Murmurs started and I thought it was because Gogo made us switch seats but then Moses grabbed my hand and I looked at him. He gestured for me to look behind me and when I did I saw none other than my father. He was accompanied by my older brothers. He took his seat and singing began. The service felt like it went on forever. Buhle slept through it all and my arms were starting to become numb as we walked to the graveside. "Baba, can you please hold her." He took her and she woke up. She was in the worst mood. She was screaming her lungs out. All of us tried to get her to calm down but she wouldn't and people started glaring at us. I tried again and luckily her fussing started to quiet down. We made our way back to another tent set up for lunch. All of us minded our business while everyone fought for the attention of Gogo and the other guests. All of MaRadebe's children sat at a table eating silently when she joined us. "So you're just going to sit here like outsiders?" She asked and I knew she was trying to rile us up. "Leave these children alone. They just buried their last father figure. They need space." Gogo said sternly. "I'm their mother. I know what's best for them. They don't need space from their mother." She responded trying to make it look like they were just having a normal conversation. "I don't even know exactly what happened but I have a feeling you've been making their lives a living hell. So walk away from this table before I drag you." She left us alone but then my brother came over to call me. "The chief wants a word." I didn't want to make a scene so Moses and I just went with him. "MaZulu." He said but I didn't reply. "Okay, this is the last time I'm going to reach out to you. I went to your house and you threw me out and accused me of murder. Now I'm here at your in-laws trying everything to get back into your life and once again you've shut me out." I still didn't respond. I wanted nothing to do with him. "Okay, fine. We're leaving. This is me walking out of your life. Either you follow me or you're dead to me." He got up and never looked back. "Mamakhe." I just shook my head. "Okay." He said and we endured the rest of the day. Alcohol was brought out and the 'after tears' began. People were drinking and singing. I didn't want to drink anything because I knew Moses and MaDlamini would be worried about me. They're already worried about me. I was playing a game on my phone with Buhle in my lap. She was halfway asleep. "MaZulu." Veronica took the seat next to me. "How's everything. You and my brother seem to be on better terms." I just nodded. I didn't know if I trusted her. "As you know, your brother Thabo and I will be getting married. We finally decided on a date but we haven't sent out any invitations just yet. It would mean a lot to him if you put the fued with your dad aside and join us." "Thabo was just here. Why didn't he ask me himself?" I kept playing my game not once looking up. "MaZulu why do you insist on being difficult about everything? If not for Thabo then for me. I stuck beside after you got out of hospital after the whole thing with Nozipho. You can come to my wedding and act you're having fun." I sighed and agreed. "Fine, but don't expect anything else from me." She squealed and hugged me before she left me alone. I texted Sicelo for a little and then we finally went back to our hut. 62 I woke up to Moses's phone ringing. "Moses. Moses wake up." He groaned but answered his phone anyway. Like always it was work. "Morning Mamakhe." He kissed my cheek after his call. "Morning. When are we going home?" He sighed. "Everyone will be leaving by lunch time. I was hoping we could leave tomorrow so Gogo is not alone tonight." I just hummed in response. "Knock knock! Is everyone decent?!" I groaned. It was Veronica. "I don't care. I'm coming in anyway. Good morning guys!" Why was she so happy and why was she so loud? "Noah is calling a family meeting. Just for us though. Not everyone. I think he wants to talk about a vacation or something." I just covered my face. "And you had to wake us up for this why?" "Well, Moses we're family and we don't act like it. To us this is a big deal. Come on. Get up! Fine, I'll leave you to get ready but just come." He forced ourselves up and got ready for the day. "Finally!" Noah said when we came out. "You do know that it's only half past nine right?" I took a seat next to MaDlamini. "So school holidays are around the way and I was thinking we go on a family vacation. Where to? I have no idea but we need it. We're drifting too far apart. This will be a nice chance for us to reconnect and to get to know MaZulu. Also so we can show her that we're not all the same in this family. I'm leaving the task of planning the trip to the ladies. But first how is everyone's work schedule. Our home is just a couple of hours away and I was hoping we could spend spend some quality time there before we head off to the city." Moses cleared his throat. "I've been out of the office a lot this year and things are a bit hectic. I need to get back as soon as possible." Noah looked disappointed. "Moses, you're the boss. You can take the whole year off if you wanted to." Noah was adamant. "That's not how it works. Especially if I'm going on vacation in a couple of weeks." Noah seemed disappointed. "Okay, that's fine. But at some point the ladies need to meet up. Please do this as soon as possible. Throughout the day everyone started leaving. I was thinking extremely happy because I got to cook. The ladies from the village joined me again and they sang and told stories. We just had a great time and everyone sat by the fire having dinner. We left early the next morning. Moses asked Gogo to come with us but she refused. "Home! Finally!" MaDlamini shouted when we stepped in. Dinner was already set out for us but I wasn't hungry. I took a long bath and threw on my robe afterwards. I was drying my hair when I saw Moses standing in my doorstep. "Yebo?" He smirked. "Nothing. Just looking." I rolled my eyes. "You better be just looking. I'm not fighting with MaDlamini again just because you couldn't follow your own rules. Now go. Go." He groaned. "Did you have to wear the robe that shows me everything." He said stepping into my room. "Moses I'm not playing. Go away. You've been with me for the whole week. It's MaDlamini's turn." He rolled his eyes. "Can I at least get a goodnight kiss." I shook my head. "No." I put my hairdryer on again so he would get the message. I wasn't saying no for him. I was saying no for me. If he kissed me I wouldn't be able to stop myself. He stood in my doorway for a little bit before he left. I got up early for our run but Nozipho wasn't in our usual spot. I ran without her. I ran a bit further than usual so I was back late. They were already having breakfast. "Morning." I said on my way upstairs. It was my first day alone. Buhle was loving it because she had me all to herself but I got bored when she would nap. I needed something to do with myself. I baked and cooked and cleaned as much as possible. The staff was getting annoyed at me but I needed something to do. I heated dinner when they got home and the. Set up the table. "How was your first day home alone?" MaDlamini asked feeding Buhle. "Fine, I guess but I need a hobby. I got bored." "How about planning a vacation." My eyes went wide. Was she mad? "Nope. Definitely not that. I'll leave that to the people who know how to be rich. A vacation to me was sleeping. Trust me. I am not qualified to plan a vacation." They laughed. "Nomzamo will be coming over this weekend so we can discuss it. She has a few ideas already. Also I got invited to a fashion show and Moses is not interested in going with me. Will you come with me? I don't want to go alone." I agreed and from that day on we were planning outfits, hair, and make-up. I did get bored in between fittings and hair appointments so I started checking vacation spots. I found something local. It was a cabin and you could drive out and do all sorts of activities. From what I've seen on movies it didn't seem like a rich person thing to do so I kept quiet about it. Saturday came and we were up early getting our hair and makeup done. "I brought snacks." Moses said coming into the room. "How are my beautiful wives doing?" I just smiled. "We're great. Did I hear food?" He put the tray between us. "The kids are excited. I hope your vacation planning is going well." MaDlamini just sighed. "It is not. I have no idea what's up with Nomzamo. She wants to travel the world in two weeks. I honestly don't have the energy for it. If we do what she's suggesting we're going to be on a plane more than were actually going to be relaxing." She complained but I minded my business. We were dressed in all white because that was the theme and we looked amazing. We did a photoshoot for our social media and then we were on our way. We skipped the red carpet and went right to our seats in the front row. It seemed like people knew each other and there were a lot of familiar faces. Artist and celebrities came up to us and I just kept my composure and acted like they were normal human beings. I also just assumed they didn't know who I was so that I looked "humble" but everytime a celebrity would ask me for a picture or just come up to me it was an added ego boost. The show was going great. I thought it was going to be one of those stiff fashion shows you'd see on movies. It was designers from all over Africa showing their work and with each country came a performing artist. They performed while the models walked the runway. The last collection was announced and it was from Ghana. The singer was announced as Zee. A woman with a huge afro came up and out of the floor with her back towards the audience. Dancers came out with her and she moved along with them. I didn't know what it was but there was something familiar about her. I couldn't put a finger on it at first but when she turned around I knew exactly who that was. She started singing and my whole body went stiff. The woman was the exact replica of me and people around us started noticing. The crowd was confused but flashes started going off and I knew I needed to get out of there. MaDlamini leaned over to whisper in my ear. "It's okay if we leave. Do you want to leave?" I nodded and she got up first and I followed her. The ride home was silent. Either I just didn't hear anything or she knew not to ask anything. It was like I was blank. I had nothing to say. I should have questions. I should be cursing at that woman. I should be having some sort of panic attack or something. Anything just not this. It's like someone flipped the off switch. I didn't know what to do. "Zethu. Zethu we're home." I looked at her and my vision seemed to get cloudy. "Zethu?" A tear fell and I could see the concern on her face. "She's my mother. That woman is my mother." 63 I took a few deep breaths in the car and wiped my tears away. We noticed that Noah's car was in the driveway and I refused to be in some sort of mental crisis in front of them again. "So you want is just to walk in there and act normal?" MaDlamini asked surprised. I nodded. "Yes. Everytime Noah and his wife comes here I cause some sort of drama. Let's just go in there and we'll talk about this some other time." I took a few more deep breaths before we went into the house. "You're back early." They were laughing when we walked in. Moses looked so happy. His smile hasn't been this wide since we first moved into the house. I couldn't ruin that. He kissed us both on the cheek. "What happened? Why are you back so early?" I answered before MaDlamini could. "Long story. I'll tell you later." He was in such a good mood he accepted my answer. We sat and had dinner but my mind was spinning. I had convinced myself that she died. It's the only reason she could stay away from us. She was a good mom to me. There was no other reason she could've left us there. Sicelo was a baby. I was a baby. I was eleven years old. How did she think we would survive? "MaZulu?" I snapped out of my thoughts. "We're going to sit outside by the fire and go through some options for vacations." Moses said and I just nodded. He helped me up. "Um, do you mind if I go freshen up? I really just want to get all of this makeup off and change into something more comfortable." I really did want to get out of this dress. "Sure. Don't take too long." I didn't want to be by myself because I didn't want my thoughts to run wild. I just wanted to get out of these clothes. I took a shower and changed into a wide leg pants and a shirt. I made sure my hair looked decent before I went outside. Everyone was on their ipads looking at something. I took a seat next to Moses and got my ipad as well. They had created a family group with just MaRadebe's kids and she sent a whole document with the vacation outline. "Nomzamo I'm concerned about the flights. We're going to be on flights more than were going to be having a vacation." MaDlamini said and Nomzamo looked disappointed. "No my love. Don't look so sad. I know you put a lot of work into this and its something I would really love to do but the kids have a short holiday. We won't be able to go to even one of these countries." Noah said. "I agree with Noah. I would love to do this with the kids. It looks amazing. Nomzamo what would you say about keeping this for December. It'll give you more time to iron things out." Her excitement peeked. "Really?" He nodded. "Yes." He said excitedly. "For now can we do something local. Gogo has been saying she wants to see the children and I think we can use that to get her to come with us. I want stress free where nobody lifts a finger. No chores to fight about." I had something but I didn't want to say anything in case they didn't like it. "So you want to go live in a hotel for a week?" MaDlamini said. "I agree with Moses but not a hotel. Something where we're all together in the same space." They were racking their brains and I knew I had the solution but I didn't know how to say. Eventually I just did it. "I think I might have something." I said sending the link to the website. "It's a lodge a few hours outside the city. We could either have separate rooms or there's a luxury sixteen room cabin. Meals are included and there's a breakfast buffet. There's a number of activities we can do in and around the lodge and they can plan the itinerary for us." I said while everyone swiped through the website. "And you've just been sitting on this information the whole time letting us suffer. This looks amazing. Why didn't you say something earlier? Do you know if it's available?" MaDlamini asked. "I called about two days ago and it was available then. I'll have to call in the morning to see if it's still available." "This house is amazing. The breakfast buffet looks amazing." Nomzamo said. I was glad they liked it. I didn't know if it was up to rich people standards. "So MaZulu please call them tomorrow so we can finalize this. See if we can book the whole resort. I don't want to have to deal with other people. I have quite a busy day tomorrow. Noah can you please check with Gogo. I know it's going to take some convincing but I really want her to come with us." We sat there talking for a couple more hours and then headed to bed. I put my phone off completely and got into bed. Moses joined me in his pyjamas. "So, what's going on?" I let out a heavy breath. "I saw my mother." His eyes went wide. "What? Where?" He seemed to be as shocked as I was. "She was a performer tonight at the fashion show." He held my hand. "How are you doing?" I just shrugged. "I don't know. I'm really trying not to think about it. This was easier when I imagined her dead. Turns out she's been around the whole time. Living and breathing and performing as if nothing happened." "Do you think you'll ever meet?" I rolled my eyes. "For her sake I hope not. I just hope Sicelo is okay. I'm sure he's going to see this tomorrow. I'm probably going to have to call him in the morning. Everytime I mention our parents he's scared that they're coming to get him." If I was being honest with myself I was scared they would come to get him too. "Why don't you get them to sign over their parental rights?" What? I could do that? "I don't think they'll agree to that especially since my relationship with my father is so bad." He seemed to be falling asleep. "Baba." He hummed in response. "I need your help." His eye opened immediately. "I'm here. What do you need?" I smiled. "To be distracted." I said and kissed him. "Distract me, Baba." He didn't hesitate and he "distracted" me until sunrise. 64 "Mamakhe. We need to stop. We're going to be late for breakfast." We didn't sleep a wink last night and I was still not done. "I'm close Baba." I could feel a bead of sweat dripping down my back as I thrusted my hips. He spanked and grabbed my hips and I thrusted faster. I held onto the headboard as I came. We took a shower together and got ready for breakfast. My wig was a mess. Nothing could save it so I wore a scarf around my head. "I wish we could stay in here the whole day." He said hugging me from behind. "I do too." "Mama!" We heard Buhle's small voice. She was tapping on the door. "Come in." Moses joked because he knew she wouldn't be able to open the door. But the door opened and it was MaDlamini. I was embarrassed by her seeing us like this. I didn't know how she felt about it. Especially since so much has happened. "Does this mean the two of you will be less awkward and there'll be less tension in this house." She asked gesturing to us holding each other. "I hope so." Moses said and I avoided eye contact with them. My whole face was heating up. "Mama!" MaDlamini put Buhle down so she could waddle to me. "Hi baby." She just made crying noises and threw her blanket at me. "What did I do? Oh my gosh." I picked her up and we all went downstairs for breakfast. She was fine. She just wanted to cuddle with me. Everyone went off to work but insisted on taking a half day. Moses was in such a great mood that he forgot most of his work stuff at home anyway. That morning I phoned and booked the resort and told them some of our requirements. Everyone came home just as I set out lunch on the kitchen island. "How was your morning?" Moses asked but before I could answer my phone rang. It was Sicelo. "Zethu! I saw it. I know where you were last night and I saw it! Zethu I swear if that lady tries to come and get me!" "Boy-boy calm down." I said moving away from everyone. I went to sit on the staircase. "Zethu I'm not playing! You know I know you've been using her identity! She can come in here and get me at anytime and nobody would be able to do anything about it! Zethu come and get me! I'm not leaving my room until I see you! My bags are packed! Come get me!" He was hysterical. "What's he saying?" Moses asked. "Sicelo, she's not going to take you. You just have until Friday and then you're on vacation." I tried reasoning with him. "Zethu you're not getting it! I'm scared! Come get me! Please, Zethu! I need you!" He was screaming so loud Moses could hear. He took the phone. "Sicelo, it's Moses. We'll do our best okay. I'm going to phone the school right now. Try to stay calm okay. I'm going to phone the school right now. Yes, Lindi, Zenandi, and Zinhle will com with us. Don't worry about it. Get all your things together neatly and leave it to me. Okay? Good. Don't you worry about it." Moses said calmly and seemed to work because Sicelo let him hang up. "I'm calling the school and getting the car ready. Don't stress about it okay." I just nodded and he kissed my forehead. He contacted the school and before he even spoke to them our drivers were off to pick up the kids. Pictures of the drivers and their cars were sent to the school and to the kids' phones. Sicelo finally stopped panicking but he wouldn't leave his room unless he saw his driver. The school thought the kids were in some type of danger and it being a school for the elite, it had protocols in place for situations like these. The whole entire school went into lockdown. They had to search the whole premises and staff and students had to have identification on them at all times and it was checked regularly. The kids had to be isolated but like I said Sicelo didn't open his door for anything. Luckily one of his teachers stayed outside his door to calm him down and keep him company. "Mamakhe, you know they're not going to be here anytime soon. Their driver says they have all fallen asleep. You should get some rest too." I just shook my head. Sicelo has never done anything like this before. He's never screamed at me. He's a people pleaser. Especially when it comes to me. For him to react this way is big. He must be terrified. "I can't sleep. Not until I see him right here in front of me." He took a seat next to me and waited with me. It was five in the morning when we got a phone call to open the gate came and I ran out. The kids were still asleep in the car. "Sicelo. Sicelo wake up Boy- boy. He opened his eyes and started crying. I eventually got him inside and MaDlamini made him tea. When he calmed down he didn't want to talk. He fell asleep in my bed clinging onto me. I didn't sleep much. When Sicelo was finally sleeping comfortably I got up. I was stressed so I started cooking. "I should've known it was you. How is he?" I just sighed. MaDlamini could see that I was stressed so she put the kettle on. "I don't know. I've never seen him like this before. Why did this woman have to come crawling out of the woodworks. She should've stayed where she was. He's terrified MaDlamini and I have no idea what to do." "MaZulu!" The girls squealed and hugged me. "Good morning. I missed you." They squeezed me so hard I thought I would faint. "We smelled food!" They helped me set up the table and and then played with Buhle. "Mama! Mama!" Buhle came waddling into the kitchen. "Yes baby?" I just made her a bottle. "Sello?" She asked for Sicelo. "Sello Mama!" "No, Buhle don't shout." MaDlamini said sternly. "Sello!" She whispered. "Okay okay. Sicelo is sleeping. Let's go wake him." I picked her up and went to my room. "Sello!" She squealed! Luckily he was up. "Sello!" She almost jumped out of my arms so I put her down. He picked her up and we went down to eat with everyone. Breakfast was loud. The kids were excited and that made Buhle excited. She wasn't saying anything she was just making loud noises and trying her best to be louder than everyone else. Sicelo found it to be hilarious and it was great seeing him distracted. Moses and I sat down with a lawyer to come up with a plan for me to become Sicelo's legal guardian. The lawyer wanted my parents to sign away their parental rights. Knowing my father he would refuse just out of spite. I was trying not to stress about the whole situation and luckily I had this family vacation to keep me distracted. Noah got Gogo to agree and she spent the first couple of days at our house before we all departed in cars to the resort. Surprisingly MaDlamini took the car with all the kids including Noah's daughters. She called it the "Party bus" and they were acting as if they were going on an actual party bus. All of them were extremely loud and excited and apparently you had to have sunglasses to be cool enough to get on the party bus. The music was already loud before we left and the kids were absolutely crazy. Even Buhle had her own pair of sunglasses and danced like she was partying the night away. Halfway through our journey we stopped at a restaurant for lunch. Gogo, Noah and his wife stepped out of their car the same time we did and we were waiting for the "party bus" that mysteriously turned silent halfway through the journey. Gogo kept giving me weird glances. I tried ignoring but it felt weird. MaDlamini eventually opened the door. "The party bus turned into the retirement home pretty quickly." We all laughed looking at the sleeping children. "Burgers!" She yelled and they all jerked awake. It was a sight to see. I had never seen her bond with the kids like this. I didn't think she was the type. The restaurant was kid friendly so they mostly just played video games and helped Buhle on all the equipment until food came. Gogo told childhood stories of Moses and Noah. It was the first time I saw her genuinely happy and smiling. This trip was a good idea. We got to the resort late afternoon and got settled. The place was better than the pictures. The kids weren't even settled yet and they had their swimming clothes on. I was extremely irritated with myself because I was just tired. I wanted to sleep and it seemed like nothing could stop me from doing so. This was my first vacation ever and all I wanted to do was sleep. The men joined the kids at the pool and the ladies went to the spa for some relaxing massages. Gogo absolutely refused to have anyone touch her after the staff explained to her in detail what would happen and what the benefits of it were, she agreed to a massage. I didn't even get halfway through the massage when I fell asleep. "Mamakhe. Wake up." I felt a kiss on my cheek and my eyes fluttered open. I was in no way refreshed. In fact I felt even more exhausted than ever. "You okay?" He asked and I nodded. I had no idea what was going on with me. I felt weird. I couldn't explain it but something was off. "Come, you can sleep in our room. I'm sure you'd eventually fall off of this narrow table." He joked and helped me up. The others were having drinks on the balcony. I didn't join. I went straight to bed. Moses woke me up again for dinner and I really tried to wake up this time. I freshened up and made myself look presentable but I was afraid I was coming down with something because I had a stomach ache. "Hi sleepyhead." Nomzamo said when I joined the table. Dinner was loud. I couldn't help but laugh at the kids antics. I was starving and nauseous at the same time while also having stomach cramps. I decided to eat something light and went with grilled chicken breast and a salad. Gogo kept giving me weird looks. Not judgemental looks but she looked like she was trying to figure something out. I let it go because she was very old and maybe it was an old person thing. We got our itinerary for the next day. We were going on a nature walk first thing in the morning and then having breakfast. Even though this vacation was my baby I did not feel up to it. The nature walk was okay besides for the fact that I felt nauseous the whole time. Gogo was driven by a golf cart and she was having the time of her life. We reached our buffet and the smell of eggs was just killing me. I excused myself and walked calmly to the toilet. When I was sure nobody could see me I sprinted and threw up in the closest toilet. Luckily I got there in time. I did feel some type of relief after vomiting but when I went back outside to the buffet the smell of egg made me nauseous again and I still had a stomach ache. I opted not to eat and just had a cup of ginger tea. That's how most of the vacation went for me. Dealing with a stomach ache, nausea, and exhaustion. I skipped out on most activities. Moses was convinced I had some sort of stomach bug and I thought by the end of the week it would be gone. It wasn't. It only got worse. I was drinking tea in the kitchen because it was the only thing I could keep down. I was getting a little bit worried because when I felt my stomach that morning it felt hard to the touch. I didn't want to tell anyone and ruin the vacation. I thought I was a lone but Gogo showed up out of nowhere. I had the biggest fright of my life. "Gogo. You scared me." She smiled softly. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I needed a rest day so I stayed behind. I also stayed behind because your husband was worried about you. I said I'll keep an eye out. How are you feeling?" She said and took a seat. "I'm okay. Would you like some tea?" She shook her head. "No, you should probably rest because you won't be able to much longer." What did she say? She had a weird smile on her face. "Gogo? What are you saying?" Her smile just got wider. "I'm saying rest now because in nine months time you won't be getting any sleep for the rest of your life." Huh? What's happening in nine months? No... No way... It can't be... Could I be... Could I be pregnant? 65 She just sat there with a smile on her face as I was wracking my brain trying to figure out if it was possible. It most certainly was. Baba and I never used protection and I wasn't on any sort of birth control anymore. I didn't know whether or not to be happy or completely terrified. The last few days I tried to participate in more activities. Gogo kept giving me knowing glances and I avoided her at all costs. It was becoming more and more likely that I was pregnant. Well that's what google said anyway. By the time we left to go back home my boobs were really sore and sensitive and I knew. I just knew I was pregnant. I was so scared. Especially since I suffered a miscarriage during my first pregnancy. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. Moses and I were in a car alone again. I was a ball of stress. I needed to know. When we reached the city I finally spoke up. "Baba, it's still early. Could we stop at a pharmacy before going home?" He nodded. "Sure, but I do still think you should see a doctor. Would a stomach bug carry on for almost two weeks? I don't think so. Anyway, do you want to get something for you stomach?" I cleared my throat awkwardly. "Um, yeah, something like that. I was thinking maybe a pregnancy test." The car jerked but he quickly gained control of it again. Drivers were hooting at us like crazy. "You think you're pregnant?" I just nodded. A huge smile formed on his face. "Yes! Thank you! Thank you! I can't believe it!" He got a call and grabbed his hand before he pressed the button to answer. MaDlamini was calling. "Don't say anything." He just nodded. He still had the stupid smile on his face. "MaDlamini." "Gumede. What happened? We saw your car swerve." I gave him a look so he would act natural. "I think I'm tired. I thought I saw something in the road. While I have you here I'm quickly going to the pharmacy to get MaZulu something for her stomach. We'll go to the doctor if that doesn't help but she says she's feeling better." "Oh, okay. She did seem a little bit better the last few days. Everyone is tired and the maids have prepared all our rooms. You two go to the pharmacy and see you at lunch. If you take too long you might find us all sleeping but I'll tell the maids to prepare your plates." They said their goodbyes and we went to the pharmacy. Moses bought the best pregnancy tests he could and bribed one of the staff members to let us into their staff toilet. The tests had a wait time of two to three minutes but it felt more like three hours. Letters started forming on one of the tests. I couldn't believe my eyes. The first test said pregnant and the others showed positive results as well. I picked up the first test and it said I was ten to twelve weeks along. Moses was so excited he picked me up and spin me around. "We're having a baby." He said and I smiled nodding. I was scared. Happy, but scared and I didn't want to tell him because he would be scared too. I was not emotionally stable enough to be a mother. What if it all got too much and I decided to off myself again? What would happen to my child? We got home and joined the others in the garden. We agreed to keep it quiet until we went to see a doctor. "You're back. Come, we're having drinks." Judging by how happy MaDlamini was I could tell she was tipsy. Moses and I took a seat on the couch. I didn't drink but we sat there and spoke about random things. Mostly about business. Moses was telling us about a piece of land he's been wanting to get but an old man who refused to sell owns it. Apparently he has been trying to aquire this land for over two years now. It was the same land he went to to get his "polygamy training". I ended up excusing myself from the group because I was tired. I took a shower and went right to bed. "Mamakhe." I felt a kiss on my cheek. My eyes fluttered open to see Moses' smiling face. "Dinner is almost ready. You should come eat so that our little one is healthy." He said placing his hand on my belly. I freshened up and put my phone on charge. I haven't used it since before our vacation. Dinner was set up outside for the adults and I joined them. "How are you feeling?" MaDlamini asked once we started eating. "A lot better. Thank you." "That's great. We were all a bit worried. You seemed very weak." Noah said. "Moses maybe you should still take her to the doctor just to make sure everything is fine." He said and Moses nodded. "Yes, of course. We have an appointment tomorrow morning." That night a didn't sleep one bit. I was in the bathroom vomiting the whole night but by two am I finally fell asleep. It felt like the best sleep ever until I got woken up. We had breakfast and then Noah and his family left. I was surprised Gogo didn't go with them. I was drinking water in the kitchen when she joined me. "So, did you confirm my suspicion?" I just nodded. "Yes, suspicion confirmed." It was one of the few time I saw her genuinely smile. I was happy she was happy. Especially after the passing of her husband. "But, I don't want to get too excited. We still need to see a doctor." Moses and I got to the doctors office everything at the hospital happened so quickly, test after test, vaccines I had to take, more tests because of my medical history. I just had to be patient and remind myself that it was for the good of the baby. Yes the baby. I was having a baby. We had an ultrasound and I could even hear her or his heartbeat. It was amazing. I found out I was ten weeks along. Baba says he or she was conceived in the week of the funeral which made sense. I was excited but I was really trying not to show it. I had this fear that if I showed my excitement God, or the universe, or whoever was in charge of all of this would just take my baby away. "Can we at least tell MaDlamini?" He asked on the way home. I just nodded. "Gogo knows. She knew before me actually." "What?" He asked shocked and I just nodded. "She's a walking talking pregnancy test." We laughed and made our way home. "Who's car is this?" I didn't even notice it. An old broken down car stood in our driveway. "I don't know. I've never seen it before." I didn't know anyone so it couldn't be for me. When we drove closer we saw MaDlamini waiting for us. She ran to the car as we got out. "I'm so sorry. I tried. I really tried." I was so confused. What was she on about? All the way inside she was apologizing. "What's going on?" She blinked rapidly. "Please don't be mad at me. I tried getting rid of her. She refused. Luckily I got the kids out before they saw her." I was even more confused. "Who are you talking about?" Baba asked. "Zethu." She said as we walked into the living room. "Zethu, it's me. Mama." There she stood in the middle of the living with her signature afro. Still as beautiful as she was the day she left us for dead. Zanele Zulu The woman who was supposed to be my mother. 66 "Zethu. Baby it's me." I was frozen. The audacity of this woman. "I saw you at the fashion show and instantly knew you were my baby. Look at you." She stepped closer to me but I took a step back. "Touch me and I'll kill you with my bare hands." She blinked rapidly. "Ziphozethu please." What the fuck was she saying "please" for? "What do you want?" She cleared her throat. "I just want to talk baby. We have a lot of catching up to do. How is my baby, Sicelo?" I couldn't believe her. "Sicelo is alive and happy without you. If you come near him I will destroy you." "Zethu he's my son." "He stopped being your son the day you left us in that shack. I don't want you near me or him. So leave before I have security throw you out." I was so upset I was shaking. She pulled papers out of her bag. "Okay, I'll leave but I'm not giving up. So, you can take these stupid papers your lawyer gave me and you can forget about me ever signing it. Sicelo is my son. My heir and I won't just sign him over to you." She tore up the papers and threw them in the floor before leaving. "Mamakhe." "Call the lawyer." "Mamakhe calm down." "Call the fucking lawyer!" "Look at me." Moses pulled me towards him. "You need to calm down. For your health and for the sake of the baby." I heard a small gasp from MaDlamini. Moses was right. I couldn't loose my temper. My baby needs me to stay healthy. I took a deep breath. "Okay, I'll try. Alerting our security to never let her or my father in here again will help." He nodded. "Okay, I'll do that. I'll also call the lawyer so we can see what our options are." I nodded. "Thank you." "Did I hear something about a baby?" I forgot MaDlamini was there. "Oh, umm..." Moses looked at me for permission and I nodded. "MaZulu and I are expecting." She squealed. "Finally! Congratulations!" She hugged me. "Nomzamo and I knew it couldn't have been a stomach bug." We laughed. "How am I the pregnant one but I was the last to know?" We all laughed together. While Moses sorted out the issue with my parents, I showed MaDlamini and Gogo the scan of the baby and told them all about my doctor's appointment. Their excitement was a welcomed distraction from my mother showing up out of the blue. "Okay, we'll go see our lawyer tomorrow. He says not to worry. He expected and prepared for this. He'll explain everything tomorrow. For now, you should just relax." I felt relieved. "Where are the kids?" I asked before doing anything else. "They are at the movies even though there's a state of the art Cinema right here at home. Before you start worrying they have nannies and security with them. They've been wanting to go and this was the easiest way to get them out of the house without all of Sicelo's questions." We both chuckled. That boy was going to be some kind of lawyer or detective some day. I went straight to bed and had the best sleep of my life. My hunger woke me up and I was disappointed to find that I only slept for an hour. I heard the kids out by the pool. I grabbed something to eat before they saw me and I had absolutely no more time to myself. I made the biggest meatiest sandwich I could and pulled up a chair by the kitchen island. I was stuffing my face when Moses joined me. "That looks good." His hand stretched out to my plate and I hit it away. "Ouch!" I just glared at him while he looked at me surprised. "This, is my sandwich. I made it with my own two hands. Don't touch my sandwich." I could tell he was keeping back his laugh. "Okay, just stop glaring at me like that." He chuckled a little bit. "You really are pregnant. I know we saw the scan and heard the heartbeat but this right here is final confirmation." I just rolled my eyes as he laughed at his own stupid joke. "Good news and maybe some bad news." Oh no. "Remember the land I've been trying to aquire?" I shook my head. "Not really, but carry on." He chuckled again. "Well, the old man who owns it asked to meet with me. I think he might be ready to sell." "Well that's good. What's the bad news?" He cleared his throat awkwardly. "I have to go see him. Which means I'll be gone for a few days. I just want to see the children off to school and then I want to go see him." I just nodded. "Okay, seems reasonable. Have you told MaDlamini?" He shook his head. "Not yet. I can't find her. I thought she was in here with you." I shook my head. "I heard the kids out by the pool. She might be there." He nodded and excused himself. That night we helped the kids pack. I was glad that Zenandi, my "mother" was already a distant memory for Sicelo. He was so excited to be back in school that he wouldn't stop talking about it. We said our goodbyes in the morning and they were off. Moses and I had an early meeting with our lawyer and I wasn't looking forward to it. Yes, I wanted to get all of this out the way, but this whole situation made me feel uneasy. I was trying to ignore it for the sake of my health and the health of my baby but it kept lingering at the back of my mind. "So, I'm fairly confident that both of your parents will give up their parental rights willingly. In the case that it's not willingly we have an airtight case. You were only eleven when you mother kidnapped you and took you far from home. Your brother was still an infant at the time. After your mother kidnapped she proceeded to abandon you with an infant and she fled the country to persuae a singing career that after all these years is only taking off now. In that time your father did nothing. They have no tie, bond, or relationship with your brother it would be virtually impossible for them to gain custody of him." "Okay, but how will you get them to sign over their parental rights willingly?" He just got a smirk on his face. "Both of your parents future's hang in the balance. One wrong move and they loose everything. Your mother is in the process of negotiate a record deal. The company she hopes to work with have zero tolerance for scandals. If this had to go public her career would be over. After the passing of you uncle, the king, your father is hoping to take over the throne. My condolences." "I never knew him but thanks I guess. Are you saying we threaten them with going public if they don't sign over willingly?" He nodded. "Yes, add that to the fact that they would never win this case and I'm sure they'll sign." My heart was at ease when we got home but then Baba had to leave. Gogo kept me company in the time he was gone which ended up only being two days. He requested a special lunch upon his return and I was so excited I cooked it myself. I was a bit surprised to see him come back with his uncle but I didn't even care. My husband was home and that made me happy. He seemed a bit uneasy during lunch and didn't say anything about the land deal he had been going on and on about. Did he get the land? Did the old man sell at a reasonable price? Why was everything so quiet. The maids came and took our plates away. Baba cleared his throat and I just knew it was bad news. No good news ever came after him clearing his throat like that. If he didn't get this land I knew it wouldn't be good for him. "So, the land I was looking at is finally for sale." Maybe I was wrong but I still had a bad feeling about this. "The owner offered it to me but on one condition. He made it clear that this condition was non- negotiable." What was going on? "What's the condition?" MaDlamini asked. "Umm, he said he would sell me the land but," he cleared his throat again. "I have to marry his daughter." What the fuck! 67 "Gumede, come on. You can't be serious. We're just finding our footing. We're only now getting to know each other. MaZulu and I are finally friends, sisters even and now you want to throw another woman into the equation. And for what? Some land in the middle of nowhere." MaDlamini said. "It's the perfect piece of land and I'll be getting it for next to nothing. He only wants me to marry his daughter." I didn't know what to say or feel. He really wanted to do this. "Why? Why is he so adamant? What's so wrong with this woman that her father is basically selling her?" He sighed. "She's a bit older and she's infertile but he still wants to ensure her future." What the fuck! "MaZulu, what do you say?" He said trying to get me on his side. "This will be amazing for us. Getting this land has been a dream of mine for years now. I need this." A tear spilled from my eyes and I wiped it quickly. "Whoever cursed me must've been really powerful." I said under my breath. "MaZulu don't say that. This is good." When it rains it pours in the Gumede household. We've been putting out fire after fire since before our holiday. I don't understand what I did wrong. Which ancestor or god did I upset for my life to be this bad. We're having a baby and Moses wants to get married to some random woman for a piece of land. I don't understand how he doesn't see this is completely ridiculous. "MaZulu?" He wasn't seriously wanting an answer from me right now. "MaZulu what do you say?" This man had the audacity to have a stupid smile on his face. "I don't care. You're going to do what you want to do anyway so I don't care." He took a sip of water. "MaZulu we're asking for your permission." His uncle said. "I don't care what happens in this family anymore. If you have MaDlamini's permission you can go ahead but I don't care." "How can a wife say that? Gogo are you hearing this? She says she doesn't care." His uncle added. "No wife will just say they don't care about their family. This family is her whole life. What has this family done to get her to this point?" I was so done. I didn't want to be here anymore. "I know this might not be the best time but your decision is time sensitive. I need permission from the both of you." I actually couldn't believe him. I couldn't believe him. "Maybe I should explain to you what I want to do with the land." He went onto explain what he wanted to do. In simple English it is a fancy apartment building for the elite. A bunch of smart house in a gated community and for this he wants to sell his soul. Lunch was over and I asked to be excused. I went to lay down. I couldn't fall asleep but just laying there helped I guess. I didn't want to raise my blood pressure or anything like that. From now on my focus is going to be me and my baby. "MaZulu." Couldn't this man just leave me alone? I sat up and waited for him to speak. "I need an answer." I couldn't believe it. He was going through with it. "Please MaZulu. This is for our future. I'm creating generational wealth here. This is for our baby." I didn't think he could shock me any further but he did. "Moses, this is not for our baby. This is you being greedy and selfish. This isn't for generational wealth. This is because you're acting like a child who is after a toy they can't have." I wasn't angry. I wasn't upset. I was just disappointed. "I don't care anymore Moses. I really don't. I say do what you want. You can tell whoever it is you need to tell that my answer is yes. Please just leave me alone. Do me that one favour. I just want to rest and be healthy for my baby because that's where my priorities lie." We heard screaming and shouting from downstairs. "Um, let me go check..." His voice faded away and he walked out. The screaming carried on and it sounded like MaRadebe's voice. I went downstairs. I was halfway down when she spotted me. "Here she is! If you think you're stopping my son from taking another wife you've got me to deal with. I'll slap you so hard you'll return to your no good of a mother's womb!" Why did this woman hate me so much? Why? I haven't done anything to her and here she was trying to fight me. Moses was holding her back. "You better let my son take another wife you useless woman!" She finally stopped fighting Moses. "Ma, that's enough! Nobody is fighting here!" His mother rolled her eyes. "If a second wife was brought here to build the family and she fails she has no right to be against a third marriage! If you don't say yes to more wives then you're not truly in this for polygamy. You're in this for your own gain! You're a golddigger!" "Ma! Stop! Stop it! Nobody is fighting you! You look crazy. MaZulu said yes! She said yes! What's wrong with you!? Why do you continue doing this to my wives!?" She stepped back and straightened out her outfit. "I'm doing it for you my boy. This land will be great for the family empire." So that's why she was here. For the money. "Ma, if you're not going to be calm and keep your outbursts and comments to yourself then I'm going to have you escorted. I can handle this by myself." She huffed. "You came to me and left your new wife at my house. What was I supposed to think when you didn't get back to me?" Wait. What did he do? His new wife was where? "So you had this whole thing planned out didn't you? You really thought you were just going to waltz in with her and we would just go with it." Nozipho also just seemed fed up. "MaDlamini please. This is my dream. You know how long I've been planning this." She just sighed. "You're unbelievable Moses. You are the most selfish person I know. Everyone in this room, including myself, dances to your tune and I'm becoming tired. You and your family continues to drain the life out of us. I'm so done. I'm tired." She could hardly get her words out as she spoke. Tears started rolling down her cheeks. The whole room was dead silent. We've never see her like this. "I'll take a page from MaZulu's book and tell you I don't care. I do not care anymore. You can do what you want. Marry your "dream" and see how far it gets you." 68 Moses disappeared for a few days after that and we were left alone. MaDlamini and I kept to ourselves and Gogo checked on us. I have never in my life felt so alone. I could see my bump popping out. I didn't know if I was bloated or if it was the baby but I wished Moses was here to experience it with me. I was eleven weeks pregnant and according to the internet my baby was the size of a lime. I was feeling slight aches and pains which are normal and I was just nauseous all the time. It felt like I was okay and not okay at the same time. I just wanted my husband to hold my hand and he was off somewhere probably with his new wife. I was drinking tea in the garden when MaDlamini joined me. "How are you doing?" I just sighed. "I don't know. How are you? You've been scarce." One of the maids brought out more tea and left us. "I've been burying my sorrows in work. Did you get Moses's message?" I shook my head. "I haven't looked at my phone all day." She took a sip of her tea and then took a deep breath. "Moses and his uncles are going to negotiate lobola for his new wife this weekend." Ever since this man came into my life all I've been doing is sighing. I just keep on sighing. "Do you think he'll be back in time for my twelve week appointment Monday morning?" Her eyes widened. "You're twelve weeks along?" I nodded. "I will be Monday." She smiled. "Wow, exciting times. I'm sure he'll be back for that. There's absolutely no way he'll miss it. Now that you mention it he'll probably bring wife number three here on Sunday so he can be there on Monday. I am not ready." I agreed. I wasn't ready either. Sunday came and we were all preparing for the arrival of number three. We waited until the sun went down but there was no word from Moses. I figured I would see him at our appointment so I went to bed. I woke up and got ready. I was getting worried. Maybe Moses did forget. I texted him and told him to meet me at the doctor's office. I got there and waited. I was the only woman there alone. Usually I wouldn't notice a woman by herself at the doctor's office but today it felt like everyone was looking at me. I knew they weren't but it felt like they were judging me. "Mrs Gumede. We're ready for you." I followed the nurse. Maybe he was just late. The appointment was quite early. He was probably stuck in traffic. I got dressed in the uncomfortable hospital gown and waited for my doctor. I sent Moses one last text. Maybe something happened along the way and he was going to be late. I kept staring at my phone and still there was no reply. This time I called. The phone just kept ringing. When I was finally done at the doctor's appointment I couldn't bring myself to go home. My chest felt heavy and I knew at some point I would start crying. I've cried enough in that house. I went on a drive, got some food, and sat in my car in a random parking lot. I ate and cried and when I was done my mind was made up. No more crying over this man. My focus would be on me, my baby and the children. I have many good things to live for and if Moses isn't one of those things, I'm okay with that. I got home and there were many cars out front. I knew I had to prepare myself to be reprimanded by the family. These cars could only be Moses's family and they probably brought his new bride home. I didn't even reach the steps leading up to the door when Moses stepped outside. "You're late. I know I didn't let you guys know but I expected you to be here." Expected? What kind of person did I get married to? "I had something important to do. I'm here now." He just sighed and led me inside. "Here she is now. Her royal highness." MaRadebe said sarcastically. All the elders sat round on couches and chairs. In the middle of the room sat a lady on a grass mat in traditional clothing. The new bride I assume. Moses led me to my chair next to his. MaDlamini sat on a chair to his right. She just kept her head down so I followed her lead. "My wives I would like to introduce you to your new sister, Amahle Ndlovu. MaNdlovu these are your sister wives, MaDlamini and MaZulu. MaDlamini is my first wife and MaZulu is my second wife. Would you like to welcome MaNdlovu?" He asked Nozipho. She sighed and straightened her posture. "I don't think there is much more for me to say. You say the ancestors have accepted her and the family has welcomed her, so all is good. MaNdlovu." "Yebo, Mamkhulu." The woman on the mat answered. "Your stay here can be very fruitful or I can make your life a living hell it all depends on you." Mumbles went around the room. "The only value you add here is your father's land and I want you to remember that. Do not think because you are older than us that it gives you some sort of authority. It doesn't. This is my house, it's my marriage, and Baba is my husband." I was not even offended by any of it. I was enjoying it. Maybe a little too much but I was glad she put her foot down early. "You are number three. You come last. If you think you're going to come into my house and take over you're very mistaken. The choice to live here comfortably and in peace will be yours to make." She was so calm it was scary. I wouldn't survive someone talking to me like that. I would be shivering in fear. "How dare you say that while MaZulu sits in the same room. MaZulu this is your house and your husband too." Now the family wants to defend me? "I don't see anything wrong with what MaDlamini said. I didn't hear a word of a lie." The family's murmurs went silent. I guess they expected me to be silent. "I agree with MaDlamini that MaNdlovu's stay here will be dependent on her actions. We have become a well oiled machine in this marriage and everyone needs to know their place. I think it's quite a reasonable request. I hope I'm not stepping on MaDlamini's toes when I say MaNdlovu is welcomed into the family." Nozipho nodded and MaNdlovu got a little smile on her face. After that we had lunch and then had a photoshoot. Moses was at his sneakiest. He had a whole wardrobe and hair and makeup department on standby so we could do this. He announced his marriage the very next day. Social media was buzzing and Moses was extremely unhappy. MaDlamini smiled from ear to ear. The public absolutely hated MaNdlovu. They claimed she was old and ugly. The media called her a downgrade. "I made dinner. I hope that's okay." MaNdlovu said to me when I stepped into the kitchen. It had been a week and the only time I was in the same room as her was at meal times. "Well, you've already done it." I said putting the kettle on. Gogo came in. "MaZulu, could you please make me a cup of tea too?" I made the tea and we all stood in awkward silence while I did it. I gave gogo hers and took mine out to the garden. I was reading when Moses joined me. "MaZulu." "Baba." He took a seat across from me. "We haven't had a chance to speak. I know I haven't really been around all week. I've started with the plans for the land and MaNdlovu and I are trying to get to know each other. I'm sorry about not being around." I guess he wanted me to respond but I didn't. "Um, I have tried to speak to you. Everytime I come to your room you're sleeping." I could feel my anger rising but I calmed myself. "Maybe you've forgotten because you've just been so busy but I'm pregnant. Fourteen weeks to be exact. Not that you've noticed or remembered. I'm tired. I will sleep. Growing a child with no support from my husband takes a lot of energy." His face dropped. "Mrs Gumede." One of the maids interrupted our tension filled silence. "Sorry to interrupt sir. Mrs Gumede MaNdlovu made dinner but I still prepared your food as per your meal plan. I hope that's okay." I nodded. "It's perfect thank you." She smiled and excused herself. "MaZulu, MaNdlovu made dinner and she's very excited about serving it. You can't eat other food." This man keeps finding new ways to shock me. "If you hadn't missed our last two doctors appointments you'd know I have very specific dietary requirements. I eat certain foods and they have to be prepared in a specific way. This is my child Moses. I'm not letting anything happen to him or her." "It's our child..." "Then act like it." I interrupted his sentence. He got teary eyed and sniffled a little bit. "You can sit here and cry all you want. I have kept you updated on everything. If you don't even have a second in the day to look at texts and emails from your pregnant wife then that's not my problem. I will not put the health of my child at risk because you want me to be nice to your wife. From now on I'm going to be selfish. If you don't understand why then there is nothing I can do for you." 69 Moses left me alone in the garden. Once he was gone I went to freshen up before dinner. I was absolutely obsessed with my minni baby bump. I wanted to show it off so badly but I wasn't ready to tell the whole family. Especially not my mother-in-law. When I was done I went downstairs. I was late after staring at myself the whole time. A certain someone was behind my usual chair. "MaZulu, thank God you're here. Your sister-wife has taken over the kitchen and she seems to want to take over your seat at the table." MaDlamini said sarcastically. "I didn't think it would be a problem. I cooked and I just wanted to dish up for my husband." MaDlamini just scoffed. "So you had to sit in MaZulu's chair to serve Baba a plate? Just because we're ignoring your existence and giving you the space and time with our husband does not mean there aren't rules. In this house there is a hierarchy and you are at the bottom of it my dear sister-wife." MaDlamini was not holding back. "Well, MaDlamini you're not at the top of it either." What the fuck did MaNdlovu just say? "MaZulu's father is soon to become King. She's been a royal all her life which puts her further up the hierarchy than you. You may be Baba's first wife but you're not the senior wife in this household. MaZulu is." She said smiling at me as if she thought I would be on her side after that. "You can wipe that smile off your face just as quickly as it appeared. How dare you disrespect us in our own home?" I was mad. "MaZulu." Moses could tell I was mad. "No Baba. Let me have my say. If we don't get rid of this attitude of hers now we'll be dealing with a bigger problem in the future." She still had that stupid smile on her face. "MaZulu I'm just stating fact. You shouldn't let MaDlamini run you like this. You're the senior wife. I'm trying to support you here." "Listen to me carefully." She nodded and I could smack that damn smile off her face. "I'm not your friend. I don't know you and I don't want to get to know you so stay out of my way and keep my name out of your mouth. Disrespect MaDlamini one more time and I'll deal with you myself. Now get away from my seat before I drag you." She blinked rapidly. Did she really think I was going to fall for her nonsense? She gave up my seat and I sat down. Gogo joined us soon after. MaNdlovu cooked steak and vegetables. She seemed shocked when the maid brought out my plate. "You're not eating the food I made?" I shook my head. "No, I have a very specific diet." She looked angry. "Why didn't you tell me in the kitchen? I could've made something from your diet." I didn't have the energy for this. "You didn't ask." I knew it was mean but I didn't care. "I made this food out of the goodness of my heart and it's not that unhealthy. I cooked the steak perfectly medium rare and I roasted the vegetables in the oven. Just try it." She was adamant. "I can't ea..." I couldn't even finish my word when she cut me off. "What's your problem? Huh?! I poured my blood sweat and tears into this meal. Since I've gotten here all you do is lay in your room! What's the point of a diet if you don't exercise!? You've only gotten fatter since my arrival!" MaDlamini and Gogo were stunned into silence. "MaNdlovu! You're out of line!" Baba's voice boomed across the table. "I'm only trying to be nice!" "You have a really funny way of showing it young lady. If it were up to me you would be going home immediately." Gogo said and MaNdlovu started sniffling. "Don't cry now. You completely disrespected MaZulu and now that you're being called out about it you're crying. All of this because MaZulu won't eat your food." She started wiping tears. "I just wanted to know why. I went through so much effort to try and win the two of you over. If you think I poisoned the food I will take the first bite to prove I didn't. I just wanted to know why you were rejecting me." "I was about to tell you when you cut me off. The day you arrived we warned you about this nonsense you're doing now. You're making your own life miserable." I said and she rolled her eyes. "And what does that have to do with you not eating my food? You accuse me of being disrespectful but you're disrespecting me." She really wasn't going to let this food thing go. "Like I said I'm on a very specific diet. I definitely can't eat your food because the meat that I eat needs to be completely cooked. I can't have any raw meat because it can harm my baby." A look of realization hit her face. "I'm not on a diet because I'm fat. I stay away from specific foods because I'm pregnant. We have accommodated you enough. If you're going to feel some type of way everytime you get rejected in this family you're going to have a really tough life here. Gogo, Baba, please excuse me. I've endured too much stress, disrespect, and insults at this table. I'm going to eat elsewhere." I took my plate to the kitchen and had the maid warm it. She absolutely spoils me now that I'm pregnant. I ate and when I was done Baba joined me. "I really want us to talk. I feel like I'm loosing you." This man. "You're not loosing me. You're throwing me away. If you can't balance work and three wives then this is not going to work for me. I'm actually glad the children are in boarding school because they don't have to face your rejection on a regular basis." "Mamakhe that's not fair." "What's not fair about that statement? You don't even have time to come to my doctor's appointments, where will you find the time to spend with your children? If you don't change your ways I promise you I will leave. I don't deserve this any neither does my child. When I said I don't care I meant it. If I'm not a priority for you I'm leaving." He nodded. "I understand. I have yet to speak to MaDlamini. Is it possible for the three of us to sit and talk? We need to iron out the details of our living arrangements." I just nodded. "Is tomorrow afternoon at lunch okay? I'll book us a restaurant and we can sit and discuss everything so that there is no confusion." I agreed and went to take a really long shower before going to sleep. Tomorrow should be interesting. 70 I got ready for lunch. I didn't know where we were going so I kept my outfit simple. Which was really difficult because nothin fit me. I grabbed a sun dress and made it work. I straightened my wig and put on some light makeup. I was going out in public after all. "MaZulu, let's get going!" I heard Nozipho. I met her at the top of the stairs. "You look so cute today." I smiled at the compliment. "Thank you. You look beautiful as always. Do you think we'll be done in time to go shopping? This is the only thing in my closet that fits me." She gasped. "With all this drama I keep forgetting you're growing a baby. Show me your bump." She said excitedly and it made me excited as well. I flattened my dress over my bump and she squealed like a child opening a gift at Christmas. "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! It's happening! We're having another baby!" I've never seen her so happy. "I'm so happy for you. You deserve this. Your really do. And yes! We definitely have time to go shopping!" We made it halfway down the stairs when MaNdlovu appeared. "Where are you going? Maybe I can come with you and we could get to know each other." She gave me the creeps. I didn't know why but I knew there was something off about her. "No, you can't come with us. We're going to have a private lunch with our husband." She narrowed her eye and folded her arms. "Well, that's unfair." She complained. "What's unfair about it? Your husband has two wives that come before you. What makes having lunch with us unfair?" She just rolled her eyes and stormed off. "Ignore her MaZulu. Let's go." We made our way to the restaurant and met Baba there. "The two of you look lovely." He said and we ordered our food. "I want to start by thanking the both of you. I know I forced my hand and I will work the rest of my life to make this up to you. I also want to thank you for your patience the past two weeks. I spent most of my time with MaNdlovu. The time with her was really needed because we didn't know eachother when we got married. So I want to thank you for allowing me to do that without any complaints." I don't remember allowing him to do any of this. He just did it and I didn't say anything. Our food came and he continued talking. "I want us to sort out our living arrangements. I want the two of you to tell me what you need. I think it's the least I can do. How do you think we should split up the week?" MaDlamini cleared her throat. "Baba if we come up with a schedule you need to be disciplined enough to stick to it." He nodded. "I completely agree. I will do my best." "Okay, I have a suggestion on how we split up the week." MaDlamini said. "I suggest you do two days with me, two days with MaNdlovu, and three days with MaZulu." "Three? Why three?" I was a bit shocked. "MaZulu, you're pregnant. You need your husband. If you don't get him in line I will. You need your husband." "Mamakhe, I agree with MaDlamini. I think it's a fare split." I sighed and agreed. "Another thing baba the maids have been complaining about MaNdlovu's attitude. She's rude and she orders them around like they're slaves." He looked shocked. I just sat enjoying my burger. "They say that they don't mind cleaning up her mess but she needs to stop mistreating them." He sighed heavily. "I don't like that. I don't like it at all. I suggest that you are in charge of the maintenance staff MaDlamini. I don't want MaNdlovu messing with them. We wouldn't survive without them." Baba spoke and apologized some more. I want to see his actions first before I decided he was actually sorry. MaDlamini and I went to a maternity wear boutique and got me a few things. We did the whole fashion show thing they did in movies. I had a great time and I absolutely loved my clothes. We got home right before dinner. I went to my room and did some online shopping. There was a knock on my door and Moses came in. He laid down next to me, took my hand and kissed it. "I miss you. I know it's my fault but I can't help but say it. I miss you. You're right here but you feel far away." I put my ipad down. "Baba can I be honest with you?" He nodded. "Of course my love." "I am far away. I am not happy here. I was happy. I was happy with you and I was happy with MaDlamini. We love you but you decided that a piece of land is more important than our happiness. And before you start I understand. I understand that you've been dreaming about this project for a very long time. I just didn't expect it to consume you the way it did." "Mamakhe..." I shook my head. "You don't need to say anything. I just need you to make me a promise and keep it." He nodded. "Anything." He sat up against the headboard. "You get consumed into things very easily. There are three of us, there's the children, there's work and this new project, and I'm pregnant. You need to find a way to balance all of it. I'm trying but I can't do this alone. I need my husband. I'm very excited to be a mother but I'm also very scared. I have nobody. You, us, this is it for me." He held my hand tighter. "I'm here. I know I've failed you and I've failed as a husband but please give me a chance to make it up to you. Please." I had to set my pride aside. This as what felt right. I nodded and he kissed me immediately. I couldn't help it. I kissed him back. "I missed you so much." We spent a few minutes together after that. He helped me choose some outfits online. We were laying together. Him with his hand protectively over my belly and me looking through some baby clothes online. My door opened and MaNdlovu stormed in. "Baba, dinner is ready." She said with a wide smile on her face. "What the hell do you think you're doing in my room?!" She had a fake look of shock on her face. "I was just..." "No! You were just nothing! This is beyond disrespectful. Out! We'll speak about this at dinner!" "But baba." "Out!" She looked disappointed and left. "I don't know what she was thinking but I will discuss it at dinner. I'm sorry about that my love." We went downstairs and low and behold the wicked witch of the west, my mother-in- law. MaNdlovu stood crying on her shoulder. "What did you do to her?! She's crying and all she can get out is your name!" "Ma, do not get involved! You have no idea what is happening!" Gogo and MaDlamini joined us. "Everyone to the living room. MaNdlovu stop crying because you know what you did was wrong. Let's go!" We all went to the living room and took a seat. "MaNdlovu did your parents not raise you well. Do you not have any respect or common decency?" She just sat there sniffing. "What happened Moses?" Gogo asked. "She stormed into MaZulu's room unannounced and uninvited. You're causing the staff a great deal of stress and messig up their work schedules so they don't get anything done. This is a very big house with limited staff for the sake of our privacy. You're trying to cause a fight between MaDlamini and MaZulu, and now you're disrespecting my wife and I. What's wrong with you! You're becoming more trouble than you're worth. If you've forgotten how to be a respectful Zulu wife I can send you back to your father's house so you can learn. Is that what you want?" She shook her head. "I'm glad we're on the same page. You will no longer be ordering my staff around. MaDlamini will be in charge of them as she always has been. They are on a tight schedule. If you need something from them you can request it. If and only if they have time, they will help you. There will be more fights at the dinner table. I don't care who cooked. MaDlamini will serve my food unless she asks one of you. I will sit at the head of the table. MaDlamini will sit on my right, MaZulu on my left, and you will be seated next to MaDlamini. I have had enough of these unnecessary fights you've been starting. It stops today." After that we went to the dining room. MaNdlovu cooked again. She cooked a beef stew and I could see the oil floating on top of it. MaDlamini gave the stew a weird look and then reluctantly dished for Baba and herself. One of the maids brought my food. After seeing the oil on MaNdlovu's food I lost my appetite. "Do you think I could maybe get a bowl of crushed ice?" I was really craving ice. She narrowed her eyes at me. "No. Not until you eat this. You shouldn't be eating ice anyway. I doubt it's good for the baby." I almost cried. "If you eat your dinner I'll make you some crushed ice." I just rolled my eyes. "I'm not a toddler you know. You can't just bribe me." I was acting like one folding my arms and all. "Mrs Gumede do you want the ice or not." I just glared at her. "I'll be more than willing to give you the ice if you finished your dinner. The baby needs nutritious food. Not a bowl of ice." I sighed. "Fine. I'll eat it." She smirked and walked away. "Wait, am I hearing this correctly? Did she say something about a baby? Which baby?" Senzo looked at me and I just nodded because I knew I wouldn't be able to hide it any longer. "Ma, MaZulu and I are having a baby." Oh no. This is the moment I've been scared of. "Oh..." My mother-in-law said. "So you waited for my son to get married and then decided to have a child. Are you trying to upstage the new bride? You had us thinking you couldn't get pregnant after your last miscarriage and all of a sudden now when my son has a new wife you decide to get pregnant." Before I could even shed a tear Gogo grabbed the jug of juice on the table and emptied it on her head. She sat the blubbering like a fish while MaDlamini laughed so hard she almost tipped her chair over. 71 MaRadebe left immediately and things seemed to be going better. Buhle came home from spending two weeks with her maternal grandmother so I wasn't so bored anymore. Moses stuck to his schedule and we saw more of him. MaNdlovu minded her business more but I could always feel her lurking around and glaring at me. In the week to follow we got word from our lawyer that my parents have finally agreed to sign over their parental rights. That was amazing but my brothers school found out that I posed as my mother and his scholarship was revoked. It was either that or I face legal action. Moses made a sizable donation to the school, and paid my brothers school fees. After the donation the school quickly changed their tune with us. Everything seemed to be falling into place for me. Until MaRadebe stormed the castle with her army of elders. It was literally ten in the morning. I wasn't even awake properly yet. "I thought I was going to go home this week but now I need to fight a bunch of disrespectful children." Gogo said when the elders came in. "The man of the house is at work. You should come back another time." She said blocking them. "We don't care. Call him. His elders are here. He needs to make his way home." Gogo scoffed. "Nobody is calling anyone. You can come back when his work day is done." One of the uncle grumbled. "I'll call him!" MaNdlovu yelled from inside the house and we heard running. "Now that's a good Makoti." I almost rolled my eyes. "A stupid one too." Gogo said and walked away. They came in and made themselves comfortable. MaDlamini came home early. I left her and MaNdlovu to entertain the elders. I didn't have the energy for it. "Mama." I heard from behind the door. "MaZulu, Baba is here. He's asking you to come downstairs." I just sighed. I was about to fall asleep. I went downstairs with them and MaNdlovu was busy serving tea. She offered me a cup but I refused. The looks on the elders faces as they sipped their tea was hilarious. "What is this? Cold water and milk? We've come all this way and this is what we get? Moses, what is this?" Baba just looked embarrassed. "If it's cold maybe I can just put it in the microwave." I took all my strength to not burst out laughing. "Microwave? Microwave! What!?" Gogo didn't keep anything in. She laughed so hard I think I saw tears fall down her cheeks. "I made scones. Maybe i can remake the tea and we can all go have tea and scones at the table." The elders grumbled. "Okay, we'll have tea and scones at the table only if MaZulu makes the tea. I don't want this battery acid you gave us." I had my little fun so I didn't fight it. I made and served the tea. MaNdlovu sat moping. MaRadebe bit into her scone and started coughing dust every. It seemed like the scone dust went down the wrong pipe. It was hilarious and Gogo's crazy laughter had me giggling as the elders helped MaRadebe. "Is this why your father sold you off girl? You can't make tea, your scones are dry, and your cooking is terrible. Tell me, what is there that you can do?" Gogo asked and MaNdlovu sat there pouting. "Okay, okay, let it go. This is not why we're here. MaRadebe tells us that this house is in complete chaos." Gogo scoffed. "This is becoming ridiculous. Stop listening to the lies my mother is feeding you. The only chaos in this house was brought by her. You've wasted a trip." The elders seemed confused. "Do you bother any of your other children like this or is it just me?" Moses asked irritated. "Moses, you are a child in this family. You need guidance. Everything we do is to help you." Oh really? "No it's not. It's to ensure that I keep lining your pockets with cash. I am a grown man, with three wives, three children, and one on the way. How am I still a child? Now I don't mind your advice. Especially when it comes to tradition and culture but you will not dictate my life and my household. If this nonsense doesn't stop my bank transfers will stop." Oh wow. The elders profusely appologized and somehow found a way to stay for dinner. "This is great. I'll cook my famous beef stew." Gogo looked horrified. "Wait, MaZulu didn't you say you wanted to cook tonight?" Gogo said giving me a pleading look. "Oh, yes. I did say so." A small laugh escaped MaDlamini's lips. "I checked with the kitchen early. They didn't say anything about you cooking. I would like a chance to cook for my in-laws. I'm the new Makoti. I should be doing it anyway." MaNdlovu was literally a spoilt child trapped in a grown woman's body. "MaDlamini, your sister is out of line. MaZulu is her senior. If MaZulu wants to cook she should be able to do so without protest from a wife who just joined this family. Have you not taught her this?" MaDlamini sighed. "Baba, I have tried." She said dramatically. I could tell she was playing her games again. "My elders I promise you I have tried." They all hummed sympathetically. "MaZulu and I have given MaNdlovu the space and the freedom to find her footing in this household. My elders I'm not one to complain but it feels like I need to get this off my chest." Oh the drama. I kept my head bowed because I did not want to laugh. "Now, you see Moses. This is where we come in. We are here to listen and to guide you. My daughter, you can't keep things bottled up. Let it out. We are here." She sat back in her chair dramatically. "We all know how this marriage started. At first we were hesitant but we allowed Baba to take another wife. We welcomed MaNdlovu into our home and we gave her the space she needed with her husband. She had more than two weeks alone with him because MaZulu and I said they should get to know each other because it's not a marriage for love." She spoke as if she was in physical pain. Almost like an old lady. "Beside for the weeks when our husband left us where it was lobola and wedding we gave her two more weeks. We can say for a whole month we didn't see our husband. He was all hers. We were fine with that because this an arrange marriage for the purpose of land." MaNdlovu was getting mad. "So finally our husband wants to have lunch with us and what does MaNdlovu do? She throws a tantrum insisting on coming with us. After we gave her all that time she still insist on taking our time from our husband. That's not the only example. She stormed into MaZulu's room demanding Baba's time." Gasps went around the table. "She's rude and she doesn't know her place. The staff had to file official complaints against her. I don't know what to do because my mother-in-law is on her side. MaNdlovu is adamant on takin over our household. Look at her sulking. This is what she does. She is unteachable. There's nothing I can do about her." The elders shook their heads in disappointment. "MaDlamini, why not go to your mother-in-law?" "Because she's a liar!" MaNdlovu burst out. "MaNdlovu, what about that was a lie?" Moses asked and she cowered away again. "It is no surprise that my mother-in-law hates MaZulu and I because she can't control us. Going to her wouldn't be any help. I could come to my family elders but she rules you with an iron fist." They started protesting and arguing. One of the elder who rarely spoke decided to hush the group. "What MaDlamini is saying about us is true. We are ruled by this woman but only because we are financially dependant on her." Huh? I thought Moses was giving them money. "Okay wait. There's no need for this. Listen, I can take MaNdlovu back to the village with me and teach her our ways. There's no need for all of this." "Quiet! I've had it with you! You are only but a widow in this family! You should not have this type of power over us." She tried to protest again but she was made silent. "Moses when you first started sendig us money to build our homes not one of us had a bank account. The village was still very rural and you had to send cash via messenger." Moses nodded. "I remember." "The money went to MaRadebe and she shared it between us. Years later she suggested a bank account because it was safer and we needed to move with the times. You paid everyone's money in that account and MaRadebe shared it." Moses nodded. "Your accountant still to this day uses that account." Shock and confusion hit Moses's face. "We have failed as your elders. I appologize my son but we need money to live. All of us worked with our hands. We dont have any qualifications and we are old. We can't get jobs. We need that money. MaRadebe knows that. She uses it to her advantage. If we don't do what she tells us we starve. There's the truth. I needed to get it out before i die. Most of the time like today, if we don't do what she says she doesn't give us our money. Or she only gives us a small portion but we have to beg for it. Your mother is the reason we are the way we are. Your mother is the reason we have failed you and I'm sure my brothers spirit is not at rest because of what we have done to you. I'm sorry my boy. I promise to do better. I'm sorry." 72 Moses was livid. He had to excuse himself and MaDlamini followed. "Sit down!" Gogo shouted and I noticed MaNdlovu standing. "The four of you have become money hungry sellouts. For you to let your plate brothers wife control you like this is disgusting. I did all I had to do to raise you properly. The choices you've in your old age are all on you. I'm disappointed in you and I'm sure your father is rolling in his grave." Moses stormed back in. "Gumede calm down." MaDlamini followed behind him. "Ma, I want you out of my house. If you ever step foot in here again I'll make you regret it. I'm done with you. Get out." His voice scared even me. MaRadebe didn't protest. She got up and left. "I'm going to find it really difficult to trust any one of you ever again but when you put me through university I promised to take care of you and I'll keep my promise but we won't be the same ever again." They thanked him profusely and even had the guts to ask him if they could stay the night. These people don't feel any shame. "MaZulu, would it be possible for you to make us lunch please? We came a very long way and we haven't eaten." I agreed and made lunch. MaNdlovu came to join me half way through. "What is it about you that makes everyone worship the ground you walk because you don't do much here. You don't cook. You don't clean. Do you even sleep with your husband?" Okay. That's it. I snapped. I had a glass bottle filled with orange juice in my hand and I threw it at her. She moved out of the way just in time but I wasn't done. I ran up on her and slapped her senseless. She screamed like a pig. "Who the hell do you think you are!" She tried swinging at me but I caught her hand and gave her another slap. "You disrespectful swine!" Everyone ran in and she started crying. I slapped her one more time. "Shut up! Shut up! I'm tired of your bullshit! You're an old woman acting like a fucking child!" I was being held back by Nozipho. "And you're a fucking child who doesn't know her place!" Did she really just say that? "I don't know my place!? You don't know you're fucking place! You are of no use to this family! You're old, ugly, and you can't bear children! You're so fucking useless your father sold you because he knew the only way you would ever be married is to trick my husband!" "Okay! Stop! Both of you!" "Baba I want this thing out of my house! I want her out!" "Mamakhe calm down. Please." "I've had enough! Either she goes or I go!" "What have I ever done to you!?" MaNdlovu cried and I tried my hardest to get out of Nozipho's grip but she wouldn't let go. "Say one more thing! I dare you! Say one more thing!" Baba shouted at her. "MaDlamini take Zethu outside to calm down. Mamakhe, please." I reluctantly went with her. "Are you crazy? What the fuck? Calm down you're pregnant. You can't be fighting people." I was mad but she was right. I was mad that she was right. "I can't do it anymore. I can't. I can't live like this. I'm going crazy." We heard yelling from inside. "Wait. Is that... Is that my mother's voice?" "Where is she? What have you done to her this time? I know if these thugs are here you've done something to my child!" "Oh Lord. Excuse me for a sec." She went inside and the yelling stopped. She pulled her mother out and I wiped my tears. "Ma are you mad? You can't just come in here and attack people." "Why?" "Have you gone crazy?" "Yes, yes I've gone crazy. If protecting my child from these criminals means I've gone crazy then yes I have. I'm crazy. They should go to jail for what they did to you!" "Ma!" "Fine. Fine. I'll stop only if you tell me what they're up to now." "It's a very long and exhausting story. Just not now. Please." Her mother nodded. "Okay, I understand my baby. How are you doing MaZulu?" I thought she was just going to leave me out of it. "I'm fine. How are you?" She narrowed her eyes at me. "You're not fine. Nozipho, I don't care. I do not care anymore. I'm going to loose my mind!" "Ma, please!" "Nozipho! I'm done! What did I tell you?! I told you to protect this girl from these monsters! I don't care about being nice and civil anymore. Nozipho, MaZulu pack you're bags. We're leaving." "Ma, wait... This can be solved." Moses came out of nowhere. I wanted to go with her. I couldn't do this anymore. "Moses! Don't try me! Not after everything!" He seemed visibly angry. "Then take your child but MaZulu is not going anywhere!" My tears started falling again. "Can you see the stress you're putting your wife under!? Look at her! Are you stupid! Why would you even allow any of these monsters around her while she's carrying your child. What kind of a husband are you??" "Ma, I'm warning you. Do not disrespect me in my own house." She just scoffed at him. "What are you going to do about it?" We all stood in a tension filled silence. "I'm taking my daughter and MaZulu with me until you can provide them with a peaceful home fit for their children." He looked livid. "MaZulu will not be going anywhere." I couldn't stop the silent tears streaming down my face. "Is MaZulu a prisoner here?" "That's not what I'm saying. You have no claim over MaZulu or the child she's carrying." She let out a roar of sarcastic laughter. "My boy, the moment you married her you gave me claim over her. You're not in this polygamous marriage alone. Your whole family is. Whether you like it or not the day you married her MaZulu became my child. That baby she carrying is my grandchild and I am tired of you and your family hurting my children. I say we give MaZulu a choice. Either she comes with me until you have sorted out your issues or she stays here." Both of them looked at me. "MaZulu, please. I love you." I didn't know how to tell him but I had to. "Baba I can't stay here. It's not good for me or the baby. You know I'm right about this. If you love me please give me a break from this chaos. Please." He just blinked and then left. My legs gave out under me but luckily I fell on the couch. "MaZulu?! Are you okay?" I felt dizzy and the world started spinning. My eyes felt heavy and I couldn't fight them any longer. I was enveloped in darkness. 73 I was rushed to the hospital and woke up as soon as I got there. I fainted. Could I be more dramatic. The baby was fine and so was I but the doctors were concerned about my blood pressure. I spent a couple of days in the hospital. I as just glad to be out of that house. MaDlamini came to fetch me the day I was being discharged. She was with her mother and she had been staying there the last two days. To my surprise Moses joined us. "Ma, I mean no disrespect but what are you doing here?" She scoffed at him. "MaZulu, you're coming home with me." I just sat there awkwardly. "The doctors say you've signed the discharge papers. Let's go my love." I didn't move. "MaZulu." I couldn't even look at him. "Baba, I can't go home. At least not right now. It's not good for me or the baby. Can you give me just a week away?" He didn't say anything. He just left. Moses was not happy about me leaving but we kept in contact throughout my absence. I really didn't understand this man. Speaking to him everyday was so lovely but I knew once I was back in the same house as him I'd be in hell. He came to fetch me exactly a week later. Both MaDlamini and I went home. MaNdlovu was still there. She greeted us at the door with Gogo standing watch over her. She had on the full Makoti kit. Long skirt and top under a pinofer with an apron around her waist, a shawl covering her shoulders, and the ugliest doek I've ever seen covering her head. In the weeks to come the house was silent. MaNdlovu and I ignore and avoided eachother at all costs. Gogo eventually went home but she put the fear of God into this woman. I was very happy when the ignoring continued. Baba and I's relationship grew better and better everyday but so did his relationship with MaNdlovu. I would see her giggling with him around corners sometimes and it irritated me. This is how MaDlamini must've felt when baba and I were together in this house. I tried not to think about it because my husband was treating me like a queen. He worshipped the ground I walked on and I loved every moment of it. Gogo came to visit for a weekend and we all went to the doctors for a scan. I was five months along and today we would find out the gender. I didn't want to have a big party. Mainly because I didn't get along with any of the family. Baba was the only one who said goodbye to MaNdlovu as we piled up in the car. Baba was convinced it was a girl because that's what it always is. I kind of wanted a girl too. A little mini me would be so cute. We went through our usual routine at the doctor's appointment and then called gogo and MaNdlovu in for the scan. "Okay, are we ready?" "Yes!" Everyone answered. "Congratulations, you're having a boy." I gasped and Gogo started crying. "Are you sure?" Baba asked in disbelief. "I'm sure. If you take a look over here." She showed his eyes widened. "It's a boy! MaZulu it's a boy!" He placed kisses all over my face like a crazy person. We didn't even go home. Moses took us to a baby boutique and bought every single blue thing in there. All of them were going crazy. I just sat on a chair watching them almost burst with excitement as they chose clothes. I couldn't help but laugh at them. We informed the family and obviously the elders were overjoyed. MaNdlovu seemed irritated by the whole thing but I didn't care. I will not let her affect me or my son negatively. Wow. My son. I was having a son. We started with the nursery instantly. By the time I was seven months along it was finished. It was a beautiful light grey and babyblue nursery equipment with only the best baby furniture there was. I didn't want a baby shower because I didn't want to deal with family but Moses and I did a photoshoot that was just absolutely gorgeous. MaNdlovu grew more and more irritated by the attention I was getting. Sometimes I caught her glaring at me. It was getting so bad I was becoming scared. I felt stupid but I had to talk to someone. "No, you're not imagining it. I've seen it too. I thought you didn't notice. I don't know what she's thinking but I know it's not good. Don't worry though. She wont be stupid enough to do anything. She's just jealous." I shrugged and we had our tea. Being seven months pregnant was no joke. I couldn't even breathe properly. I couldn't sleep. Moses was snoring and I was sitting up rubbing my belly. Every single time I tried sleep my baby boy started kicking. And his kicks were strong. I loved his kicks but I was tired. The snoring next to me stopped and the bedside lamp went on. "Everytime I wake up you're already up. What's wrong Mamakhe?" He asked kissing my cheek. "You son doesn't want to sleep. He's having a party in there." He chuckled. "Hey. You need need to let your mother sleep. Every night you're up kicking her." It didn't work. It just made it worse. "Baby." "Mm?" "I've been thinking about a name. I really like it. As soon as it came to me I grew attached. I didn't want to say it incase you didn't like it." "Just say it Baba." I didn't have any clue what to name him so I was open to any suggestions. "Okay. Here goes. Nkosi Gumede." I gasped a little. I felt a cold shiver run down my spine and I started tearing up. "What? You hate it don't you?" I shook my head. "No, it's perfect. I love it. Nkosi Gumede." Nkosi meant king, chief, or leader. It was perfect for the heir of the family. We decided to keep the name secret. In the weeks to follow MaNdlovu seemed to be extra cheerful around the house. She would go around humming songs and she just had a pep in her step. Nozipho and I were having our morning tea in the kitchen when she walked in. "Sawubona." We didn't greet her back. "What's gotten into you?" Nozipho asked her. "Oh nothing. I'm just happy. No, let me not lie. I'm very excited because a certain somebody is about to be kicked off their throne." She said eyeing me. "Anyway, I'm going to brunch with my new found friends. MaZulu, you might actually know them. They are also sisters in a polygamous marriage. They've told me so so much about you. MaZulu, you really were a naughty naughty girl. This innocent act of yours is about to come crumbling down." What the hell was she talking about? "I don't even have friends." I said when she walked away. "Don't worry about her. She's starting with her nonsense again." I don't know what she's up to but I don't have the energy. 74 I decided I would ignore whatever it is MaNdlovu was going on about. MaDlamini and I visited the kids at their school during their off time and everyone was super excited about the baby. I didn't want to leave them but I knew we had to. MaDlamini and I shopped until we couldn't anymore. The nursery was so full we had to start packing clothes in other rooms. MaNdlovu minded her business. She seemed to go back to her normal self again. She tried her best with Moses but he just seemed disinterested. She did this to herself. She only had one person to blame for this mess she created. The family wanted a baby shower but I refused. Not one of them liked me so why in the hell would I want to celebrate my baby with them. Especially with the other wives who hated my guts. They probably hate me even more because I was having the first boy in the family. I really didn't want to deal with any of that. "Hello! Is anyone home!" Oh hell no! MaRadebe. "Moses! Zethu! Nozipho!" We were all in the tv room watching a series. "Moses, go deal with your mother please." Nozipho said and he just sighed. "Oh, here you are." She came in with gift bags and took a seat. "Ma, I thought I told you to not come back here again." "My boy please. I've apologized to you countless times. Let's leave everything in the past. I've come with gifts for my grandson. You'll love them Zethu. MaDlamini go tell the maids to get my suitcases from the car. I'll be moving in to help Zethu. Us boymoms should stick together." What the fuck? "You're moving into this house? My house? You must've lost your fucking mind." "Nozipho." Moses gave her a look and I thought he was being fooled by this woman again. "Ma, please leave. We don't want or need you here." "Moses, Zethu needs me. When the baby comes I'll be able to teach her how to take care of him." "What exactly are you going to teach her that she doesn't already know? She raised her brother and my daughter. She's done it all before. She doesn't need you or your lousy gifts that you probably laced with some kind of muti. I don't care about tradition or respect, I will physically throw you out of this house myself. Moses can try and stop me if he wants but he won't succeed. Get out! We don't need you here." MaRadebe looked at Moses and then at me but we had no more sympathy for her. She started walking out and Nozipho came to grab the bags and followed her out. "The nerve of that woman. Zethu are you okay?" I nodded and we continued our night of series and snacks. MaDlamini and Baba absolutely spoiled me for the next couple of months. I had daily massages, my nails were never chipped, I was having the best sex of my life, and it felt like I had no stress in the world. MaDlamini and I were having our morning tea when MaNdlovu walked out in an all pink outfit. She looked like one if those old church ladies. She had the hat and all. "Where are you off to?" She just glared at MaDlamini. "None of your business." She said before leaving. When we were sure she was gone we both burst out laughing. "I think I'm gonna pee in my pants!" I said laughing. "She looks like a pink cupcake and not in a good way. I bet you the only reason she came in here was to show that horrendous outfit." We laughed until I actually had to go pee. Life was good. Even at eight months pregnant. I felt like a wale but I was happy. I was lying in bed scrolling on my phone when my world came crashing down before me. There I was on my own screen completely naked trying to cover my face. "I don't want my face in it" I complained on the video. You could still see my face. It wasn't that many years ago but I looked so young. "Come on. Behave baby, I'm making a video. I'm the only one whose going to see it." Dumisani my ex said. "No, stop." I started crying hearing myself sound so helpless. I remember that day. The whole thing felt wrong. I didn't understand why at the time. I knew I didn't want the video but I needed his money at the time. I cried seeing what that man was doing to me. How did I live like that? "Open up." He hit my thigh and forced my legs open. He shoved his dirty fingers in me and I looked like I was in pain. I couldn't move. I couldn't stop staring at the screen. At the time I thought I knew what I was doing but I looked so scared and helpless. "Look at that. Completely wet." I couldn't do it anymore. I stopped the video. The asshole posted it on Twitter and it had over a million views. "Where is she!" Oh no. Moses. "Moses wait! Maybe she doesn't know!" He burst into my room with MaDlamini following him. "Baba!" "Did you think I wasn't going to find out! Get your shit and get out of my house!" What? What was going on? "Baba, what..." "Get your shit and get out! Did you really think you could cheat on me with a potential business partner and get away with it!? Is that thing you're carrying even mine or were you trying to trick me!?" "Baba no! This happened before you and I even met. I swear!" I tried going to him but he pushed me away so hard my back hit the wall. "Do you think I'm stupid! Do you really think I'm dumb enough to believe anything you say! Get out of my house! Get out!" "Moses wait. Let her explain! Nothing in that video looked..." "Shut up!" I was balling my eyes out. Why wouldn't he listen? I never even thought of cheating on him. "Zethu get the fuck out of my house!" "No! Not until we talk." He was breathing heavily. "Please Baba! I didn't cheat on you! I would never." He let out an angry growl and slapped me so hard I tasted blood. I heard Nozipho scream as my vision went fuzzy for a moment. I couldn't believe it. I fell to my knees and cried at his feet. "What do you not understand! Get the fuck out of my house you whore!" "Please! Please listen to me!" I begged at his feet. "Oh, you're stubborn." He picked me up under my shoulders and started dragging me. I screamed with everything in me. "My baby! Please! My baby!" He dragged me out the door and Nozipho had him by the neck. He let me go but threw her to the ground. I heard a scream and then deafening silence. He closed the door and I screamed as he came for me. He carried me down the stares kicking and screaming. I only had one thought on my mind. If I don't get out of here, this man is going to kill me and my baby. 75 Everything happened so fast. He was dragging me down the stairs, and I was doing all that I could to protect my baby bump. "Yes! Finally! Get the tramp out!" MaNdlovu screamed as he dragged me out of the house. He put me in a car and shut the door. I didn't even recognize him. He looked like a monster. MaNdlovu stood cheering. Maradebe stood beside her, looking down at her shoes. I just had a feeling both of them had something to do with this. "Ma'am I've been instructed to take you wherever you need to go. I suggest someplace out of the city." I looked at the driver through the front mirror of the car. "I know where your father's house is. Maybe I can take you there." He spoke as if it was a normal day. He drove me around all the time. I was always nice to him. Why would he just let this happen to another human being. "Ma'am?" I just nodded. My brain was foggy. I couldn't make any decisions. What was I supposed to do? The drive was silent. I couldn't stop replaying what happened in my brain. Why would he do that to me? Why wouldn't he listen? Oh my God. Nozipho! Was she alive? I was so terrified that I started shaking. My baby? Was he still alive? Just as I started sobbing again, I felt a kick. Panicked sobs turned into sobs of relief. "Ma'am, we're here." I looked up and noticed that it was dark outside. We were standing in front of my father's house. I tried moving, but my muscles were so stiff. "Could you maybe hoot?" My whole body hurt. I could hardly move. He did as I asked. My brother came out. "Zethu? Baba! It's zethu!" He sounded excited. The gate was locked, but I got out of the car anyway. The excitement faded to anger. "Did that man do this to you?" My father came out behind him. "Leave her! She's not welcome here. This thing has disrespected me enough! She's banished from this land. I'm the chief here, and I make the rules! This is what you deserve!" He shouted. My brother tried opening the gate, but the look of pure hatred in my father's eyes told me I wouldn't survive here either, and anyone who stands up for me will lose everything. I got in the car and told the driver to drive. "Where would you like me to go?" "I don't know! I do not know! I have nowhere to go! There's nobody left! I have no one!" I sobbed and sobbed until I eventually fell asleep. I was woken up by the car shaking as if we were driving on uneven roads. The sun was bright when I opened my eyes. I guess the adrenaline wore off because the side of my face was pounding. "Where are we?" My throat felt raw, and my voice was completely gone. "We're at your husband's grandmother's house." He gulped. "I should've been back at work hours ago." He looked nervous, and I think I knew what that meant. He couldn't go any further. The car slowly stopped, and he gulped again. I accepted my fate. I didn't say anything. I just opened the door and struggled to get out. I could see the house in the distance but it was still far. I thanked him and shut the door. I walked slowly. Every now and then, my baby would kick reminding me he was still there. It was the only thing keeping me going because the village seemed much further than what it looked like. I was getting closer, but I felt so weak. People started calling out for me. I could see a group of them running towards me, so I stood still. It was a group of women. "I know her. I remember her. She's from Gogos' family. She was the nice one." I started feeling dizzy. "We have to get her back." They helped me and took me to the closest hut. I was given some water and told to wait. "Zethu! What happened? Who did this to you?" "Nozipho..." was all I could get out. She had a look of horror. "No! Not her!" I tried yelling, but it came not in a horse whisper. "Call her. I don't know if she's alive." As soon as the look of horror disappeared from her face, it reappeared. She ran out of the hut while the other women tried nursing me back to health. I spent almost the whole day with the women. Gogo was nowhere to be found. At nightfall they took me to Gogos house. It was just like before. She had a tiny house with just a bedroom and living room. It still had the huts surrounding it. They put me on her bed. "She's gone to the outskirts of the village for signal. My husband drove her there. I'm sure she'll be ba... Oh, there she is." "Nozipho?" "She's fine. I couldn't get a hold of her all day, but her mother eventually picked up her phone. She's in hospital but she's fine. She's okay." She gave the woman a look, and the lady left. "You have to tell me what happened. You have to. Nozipho is in hospital with a skull fracture, and you're here with a swollen face. I need to know." I began to shake. I was trying so hard to stop myself from crying, but I couldn't. "Moses!" Is all I got out before crying hysterically. She tried comforting me, but nothing helped. I just cried until I fell asleep. I woke up wincing at the pain I was in. It was just getting worse. Gogo came in after hearing me struggling. She helped me sit up in bed, but she saw my legs. It was the first time I saw them, too. They were bruised up from being dragged down those stairs. "What happened to you?" She whispered with tears welling in her eyes. I could barely move my arms. They were the most painful. "Where else does it hurt?" I wanted to cry, but my eyes were dried up. "Everywhere. It hurts everywhere." Her tears fell as she helped me undress. She had to steady herself when she saw my body. "Did he do this?" Standing in front of the mirror, looking at my black and blue body broke me. I thought I couldn't be broken any further, but seeing what that man did to me broke me completely. He was supposed to be the love of my life. When I was watching that video, it felt like my world came crashing down. Somewhere deep down, I thought he would help me, but instead, he did this. What sin have I committed to be living a life like this? Why do I have to suffer this much? "What have I done to deserve this?" "Don't think like that?" "What have I done?!" I cried, looking at the disgusting body in front of me. "He was supposed to love me. He promised." I fell to my knees. "He was supposed to love me!" I cried in her arms for hours. "What have I done to deserve this?" 76 The next morning, Gogo woke me early. It was still dark out, and the only light we had was a candle. She prepared some water for me and helped me bathe. I cried from the bruises. I didn't have anything for pain relief. Gogo dressed me in what I assume was one of her dresses, and she made me eat some porridge before getting me into the neighbors car. "Where are we going?" She took a deep breath. "Hospital. We need to make sure you and this baby are alright." "We're fine. I can feel him move and kick. I'm fine. We don't need to go." I was scared. What was I going to tell the doctor about all the bruises on my body. I felt stupid thinking it, but I didn't have the strength to deal with laying a charge against that man. He had all the resources in the world, and I had nothing. "Zethu, I can see the panic on your face. Please, don't think about that man. Think about yourself and the baby. That's all that matters, okay? This baby is the most important thing in the whole entire world. It's all you need to focus on. When we get to the hospital, we can contact Nozipho and work on a plan forward, okay?" I just nodded. She was right. I needed to focus all my energy on making sure my baby was okay. We got to the hospital, and my heart was racing. How would I explain the marks on my body? I was ready to deal with any of this. What if the doctor called the police? After checking out my face, she went through the regular tests. I obviously lied about my face. I could tell she wasn't buying it, and Gogo sat there shocked. The doctor could tell I wasn't okay because I didn't have full mobility. She tried prying it out of me, but I didn't know what to say or how to say it. "She..." Gogo started. "She has other bruises too." I could see tears in her eyes. "May I see them?" I just looked down. I didn't know what to do or feel. "I won't do anything you aren't ready to do. But I can photograph and document your injuries so you have proof whenever you're ready." The doctor said. "Yes, she'll do that." Gogo answered for me. "I need the patients consent." I nodded. "I need verbal confirmation." "I'll do it." The checkup continued, and she she gathered all the information I might need at a later stage. I was admitted to the hospital because the doctors were concerned about my baby's heart rate. I was silently panicking even though doctors reassured me he was fine. I was still panicking. I didn't sleep one bit. Gogo convinced the hospital to let her stay with me. I was even in a private room. "Gogo?" "Mm?" "How are we going to pay for all of this?" "Don't worry about it." "I am worried about it. I don't have any money." "Don't worry about it, Zethu. I have the money for it." "How? You live in the village with no resources. I know you don't have anything." She just chuckled. "Looks can be deceiving my child. Now stop worrying about everything and sleep." I tried, but as soon as I did fall asleep, nurses came to check on me. Early that morning, a nurse brought Gogo a smartphone. I was so confused. She just gave it to me so we could call Nozipho. "Hello?" Said a weak voice. "Hello. Nozipho?" There was silence before i heard sniffing and crying. "Hi. She'll call back in a few minutes, okay?" I heard her mother say, and the call ended. "She'll call back." Gogo just nodded. She called back about twenty minutes later. "How is the baby?" "He's fine." "Gogo said you're in the hospital?" "Yes, doctors were concerned about his heart rate. It was a bit low yesterday, but it's been going back up to normal slowly." "Okay, good." "Nozipho?" "Yes?" "Could you do me a favor, please?" "Of course." "Can you please check on Sicelo. I don't have his or the schools number, and I don't want to worry him." There was a long pause. "I called yesterday. They were fine, but he heard about the video." "No. No. No. No." I couldn't keep it together. "I'm sorry, Zethu. I told him you wouldn't be able to contact him for a little while, but he said that he understands." I felt terrible for constantly putting my brother in situations he didn't ask for. He idolized Moses so much. I don't know what he will do if he ever finds out what that man did to me. At some point throughout the week, my babies blood pressure dropped too much too quickly, and I had to have an emergency c-section. Gogo had gone out to get lunch, so I had nobody. It was just me. Surgery went off without a hitch, and the moment my baby boy was shown to me, I cried. I cried like a baby. But these tears were welcomed tears. He was beautiful and he was strong. He held onto my finger as tight as he could. Heating him cry was like music to my ears. The nurses offered to take pictures, and I couldn't say yes fast enough. When I woke up from surgery, Gogo was there. "I saw him. He's so beautiful, my child. He looks just like..." Her smile faded. I knew who she wanted to say. That man didn't deserve my son. He was too pure and too precious to be tainted by his spineless father. "Does he have a name?" I nodded. "Nkosi Gumede. His father named him." A tear ran down my face. "But I love the name. It suits him." She nodded. "It's does. It's perfect." I spent a couple of days in the hospital. I was worried about how I was going to take care of my son. I didn't even have clothes or a blanket, but the day I was discharged, Gogo came with a fully stocked baby bag. I cried in relief. The hospital gave me a fully stocked baby bag as well and a lot of medical supplies for myself. I was so grateful, and I was a crying mess. We went back home, and I was shocked to find more baby stuff. "Gogo?" "I had to do it for my first great grandson. I don't want you to be worried about anything. I want you to heal in peace and bond with your baby. You deserve it." I was so excited. My boy was here and he was loved. The next three months were difficult butil I had so much help. The ladies from the village became like mothers to me and my son. I kept in constant contact with Sicelo and Nozipho. I had to explain to Sicelo that Uncle Moses wasn't part of our lives anymore. He was crushed, but with time, he got used to the idea. Nozipho kept him in school, and he was having the best time on tour with his rugby team during the school holidays. He was still very close to Nozipho's girls. They were like siblings. Everyone at school assumed they were siblings anyway. I could listen to him talk about his school life and adventures for hours. It's everything I ever wanted for him. He was happy even without Moses. "Zethu, sorry to wake you, my dear, but you have a guest." I was so confused. "A guest?" Gogo nodded. I pulled myself together and went to see who it was. "Nozipho!" We hugged each other tightly. It was the first time I saw her since the incident. "Look at you. You're a proper village girl now. MaZulu, you're glowing." She said in disbelief. We sat down and I poured some juice and got biscuits. "Zethu, I have to be honest. I thought I was going to find a depressed person, but you look great." "Thank you. You almost did find me that way. If it wasn't for Gogo, the ladies in this village, and my son, I wouldn't be sitting in front of you." "The baby. Oh my gosh. Can I see him, please?" I couldn't help but smile. "He should be waking up now." Just as I said that, he cried. I went to check on him. I changed him and then brought him out. We spent the day together and I was surprised that she was staying. I did my chores as I listened to her stories about the girls and Sicelo. "MaDlamini, what happened after I left?" She took a deep breath. "I was hoping you wouldn't ask. After Moses did what he did, I woke up in hospital. I thought you were dead. I thought the baby was dead. I didn't know what happened to me. Apparently MaRadebe called the ambulance and told them I fell. That's what my mother said happened. I sent people to fetch my things and he wouldn't let them. I had to send them with lawyers and security. I got my things and filed for divorce. He signed the paperwork just like that. Not even a question. I sold my part of the business and I've cut all ties. That snake MaRadebe came to see me. She was going on and on about how Moses was constantly drunk and how the company is suffering. All this in just a couple of months. I opened a case against all of them and I'm waiting for a court date. I suggest you do the same and on top of that, sue the bastard that leaked that video and press a criminal rape charge." "Rape?" "Zethu? Are you serious?" "I wasn't raped. He was my boyfriend." "Zethu, it doesn't matter if he was your boyfriend or even your husband. That man raped you, he recorded it, and he posted it online for the whole world to see. He needs to go to jail." I didn't know what to do. I spent days trying to avoid the subject. I tried telling myself that it wasn't true. That's what was expected of me. He took care of me, and I was supposed to... I don't know. I just felt angrier the more I thought about it. Both of those men destroyed my life. I can never set foot in public again. I've been humiliated infront of millions. I want revenge. "MaDlamini?" "Mm?" "I need a lawer." 77 Nozipho wasted no time in getting me in touch with her lawyers. The more they explained the long, drawn-out process that I needed to go through, the more scared I got. I didn't know if it was worth it anymore. This would be difficult. I would have to air put all my dirty laundry, and it would be very public. I knew for a fact that I didn't want this marriage anymore. So the first step was divorce and gaining full custody of my child. For some reason, Moses did not want to settle out of court. His team of lawyers made sure I knew I was not getting his child, and they would be going for full custody. "I hate him. I hate him, Gogo. He could've killed my child dragging me down those steps. He's never ever met him or reached out to meet him, but he wants full custody? I hate him." She just listened to me. Sometimes, I felt guilty talking like this because he was her grandson, but I couldn't help it. I had a meeting with my lawyer. "I know you didn't want to do this, but I advise that you lay a charge of domestic violence against him." I shook my head. "That would end him." Nozipho scoffed. "He's a man. The world will get over it, and then he'll carry on and make more money." I still didn't want to do it. "No, let's first go to this meeting and see what happens. Then I'll decide." We had a date set for mediation, and I wasn't looking forward to it. I decided for the first time since getting married to wear pants. I didn't cover my head either. It felt... good. We got to the meeting, and nobody was there. Ten minutes later, Moses walked in with his wife and five lawyers. Five lawyers! I started panicking. I was going to lose my son. My lawyer passed me a not. "Calm down. He's just trying to intimidate you." I read and then looked up at Moses smug face. This man disgusted me. I wanted to ruin him. "Listen, my client wants his family back. MaZulu knows her husband loves her. He acted out of anger by evicting her. He would like for her to come back home." Ivalmost scoffed. "We'll, my client has advised me that she would not be doing that. Listen, my client wants absolutely nothing from Mr Gumede. Need I remind everyone here that there was no prenuptial agreement when they got married. My client is willing to walk away with nothing hut her son. She does not even want child support. All she wants is for Mr Gumede to sign over his parental right." "MaZulu, have you lost your mind? Have you lost your damn mind! You did it to your parents with your brother now you want to do it to me!" Moses yelled. I was terrified. As soon as he started shouting, all I could imagine was him throwing me to the floor and dragging me out of that room. As his lawyer tried calming him down, I passed my lawyer a note. She nodded, and we left. We took all of my evidence and laid a charge of domestic abuse against him. As soon as I did that, Nozipho did it, too. His arrest became public. It was everywhere. Prepping for court and taking care of my son became my life. I did everything in my power to make Gogo comfortable. I kept the house in prestine condition and made sure to do chores around the village. I was working like a mad woman. I was in the fields, collecting water, collecting firewood, and herding cows. It kept me going, and it gave me muscles and motivation to get through this. By the time we were ready for court Moses's lawyers called a meeting. He would agree to my terms and pay my legal fees if I dropped the charges. I agreed. Onto my next target. The lawsuit was filed and he immediately wanted to settle out of court. "I want everything. I want his whole life to be ripped to shreds like mine is. I don't care if this lawsuit goes on forever. I want everything." She was prepared. My son was almost six months old and he was the cutest most precious thing in the world. Gogo called all her sons to her house and they met Nkosi. They were extatic. I was weary of them but they promised to keep my location a secret. The did a ceremony to introduce my son to his ancestors and all went well. Until one day MaRadebe arrived. "Go go go." Nkosi was sleeping on my back and Gogo made me hide in the room. "What do you want?" "Gogo, please. My son is drowning. He won't survive this. Can you please speak to Zethu. I know she respects you. Maybe you can talk her out of going through with the divorce." "MaRadebe what do you mean? As we speak Zethu is no longer your abusive coward of a son's wife. To think I wasted so much time focusing and building that boy to what he was only for him to turn around and beat his pregnant wife." "Look, he wasn't in the proper frame of mind that day. I was just so angry that I..." She stopped herself. "That you what?" Gogo asked. "It doesn't matter. What's done is done. Could you maybe come speak to Moses. He says you haven't been answering his calls. Please. He needs you. He's spiraling." "Tell me what you did MaRadebe. If you don't your son will never see me again." There was a long silence. I even thought maybe she left. "MaNdlovu had these two friends." Of course that bitch was involved. "She met these friends at events for women in polygamy. Her friends told her they knew MaZulu. MaZulu was their husband's mistress. She asked them for proof but they didn't have any. She told me about it and we convinced the husband to give us proof. We even convince him to post the video." "Oh, the video where he very clearly forced himself on your daughter-in-law." There was silence again. "So you saw your daughter-in-law get raped and your response was to post it on the internet. You're a sick human being! You're sick and I never want to see you again!" Gogo shouted and Nkosi woke up crying. "Is that a baby? Is that my grandson?" She ran into the room and I backed us into a corner so she couldn't see him. "Zethu, please let me see him. He's my only grandson. Please Zethu." "Do not come near me. My son is nothing to you. You've made that abundantly clear." She was crying so hard she could barely speak. "Please." She got on her knees. "I'm begging you. Even if it's just this once. Please Zethu. Please!" She cried but I was not going to fall into her trap. She watched her son almost kill me, my baby, and Nozipho because of her actions and now she wants to sink her claws into my baby. No way. "MaRadebe, you should leave and forget that I ever existed. You don't have a grandson." She lifted her head and I saw the evil in her eye. "My son will fight this. He's going to get his child." "Your son signed away all his parental rights just so he wouldn't go to jail for almost killing us. My son doesn't have a father and your son doesn't have a son. Now leave. Leave!" She screamed as tears fell from her eyes. Gogo helped her up and she just went with her. Gogo led the screaming woman out of the house and locked the door. I was done. I was done with all of them. I decided to settle out of court but not after taking everything from that man. He wanted to avoid a rape charge so bad that he handed me everything he owned. He ended up filing for bankruptcy. I was sitting with more money than I could ever imagine but I didn't want to move. I didn't want to leave the village. I loved it here.
"So, what are you gonna do?"
"I don't know. I know I need to pay the two of you back." Both Gogo and Nozipho refused. No matter how many times I tried to pay them back for everything they did for me they refused. "Gogo, I don't understand. I saw the the medical bills you don't have that kind of money. "Who says I paid for anything?" I was so confused. "Gogo the bills were settled. I was even in a private room. Who settled the bill? Don't tell me Moses..." "No. Not him. The hospital paid for everything." "Huh? Why?" "My dear, I own the hospital. My name is on the front of the building." I thought about it. "What's the hospital's name again. Siphiwe Grace Med?" She nodded. "Gogo?!" "Mm?" "You're Siphiwe Grace?!" She just nodded. "What?" She nodded again with a smug smile. "Wow." I was even more confused. "So why do you live here?" "Don't be rude." "Sorry." "I love it here. Life is simple. It's home. Why are you still here?" I just smiled. "I love it here." After that I decided what to do with my money. J invested a lot of it and saved a huge chuck. I made sure to put money in trust funds for my brother and my son. After my future was taken care of I bought the land the village was on. I built a modest home for myself and made subtle changes. I made sure to make life easier and more convenient for everyone but I kept it simple just the way they liked it. I was at peace and I was completely satisfied with my life. I found my piece of heaven. They say you can't pick your family but I was lucky enough that I got to. Gogo, Nozipho and her girls were my family, and we were happy. As for my ex-husband, Nozipho was right. His business didn't suffer much but he soon married more wives and according to Nozipho they just created scandal after scandal. It was like he created his own personal hell where he had no peace. I tried not to think about it or feel any type of joy for his pain, but every time Nozipho told me about his his new wives, he continued finding new ways to embarrass him, I smiled a little. My world revolved around my little family I created and Moses was not part of it. I was finally happy. ........................................The End.........................................
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