Hargrave Et Al - 2020 Transgenerational Theories and How They Evolved
Hargrave Et Al - 2020 Transgenerational Theories and How They Evolved
Hargrave Et Al - 2020 Transgenerational Theories and How They Evolved
Transgenerational Theories
and How They Evolved into
Current Research and Practice
Terry D. Hargrave and Benjamin J. Houltberg
As therapists, we see and hear almost a predictable cadence come out of the voices of
our clients, couples, and families. Whether it is in the effort to describe the problem,
where they are stuck in life, or how they describe their personhoods and relationships,
we hear and see the patterns of the past and how the people we seek to help came to
know and understand themselves and relationships. As we listen, we may call the nar-
rative or story different things such as the problem saturated story, the attachment
history, or the nuclear family emotional process. The fact remains, however, most of
us in the therapeutic context will begin to ask companioning questions about the
people we help and their pasts and how they were raised as well as the essential rela-
tionships that formed and shaped identities and senses of safety. We are still curious to
know how the past and the history of relationships came to impute meaning to the
interpretations of self as well as the beliefs that shaped behaviors in relationships. It
seems fundamental to our systemic family therapy (SFT) DNA to ask questions like
“What experiences or relationships were the most important in your life?”; “Where
did you learn the beliefs you are talking about?”; and “How did you learn about being
a woman or a man in the context of your culture and family?” We are still interested
after all these years to therapeutically chase down the origins of pain, misunderstand-
ings, and impacts of behavior and relationships with our clients. We are, in other
words, all doing at least some of the work we learned in our field’s beginnings through
the transgenerational theories of family therapy.
This does not mean, however, we all do the therapy as it was first identified in the
transgenerational theories. From our viewpoint, we see how the transgenerational
theories were primarily involved in the beginnings of our family systems thinking but
then evolved into more orientations that were experiential in nature. As the impact of
neuroscience and mindfulness has grown in our field, there has been a further evolu-
tion of how to efficiently make sense of the past, capsulate the understanding through
systemic patterns, and then move clients to the work of mindfulness and practice in
order to make the changes they deem necessary and useful to solve problems and
The Handbook of Systemic Family Therapy: Volume 1, First Edition. Edited by Karen S. Wampler,
Richard B Miller, and Ryan B. Seedall.
© 2020 John Wiley & Sons Ltd. Published 2020 by John Wiley & Sons Ltd.
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318 Terry D. Hargrave and Benjamin J. Houltberg
create better relationships. In this chapter, our goal is to not only create a scaffold of
three major transgenerational theories but also trace how the experiential theories
evolved from this rich beginning and provided a further scaffolding to the more
recent evolution of current models utilizing emotional regulation, mindfulness, and
practice of new behaviors into habituation.
Transgenerational Theories
t riangulate a child into their emotional reactivity, the child is subject to the emotional
impairment and is likely to have difficulty maintaining any sense of differentiation in
the future (Bowen, 1978). Bowen (1972) saw clearly how he was triangulated into his
own parents’ relationship and was insightful enough to develop interventions and
clarity on how to de‐triangulate himself.
Another consequence of differentiation is the third interlocking concept called the
nuclear family emotional process. Bowen (1978) believed dyadic partners sought out
or were only able to attract others who were somewhat at equal levels of differentia-
tion. Of course, when highly differentiated partners create family, they raise children
in an environment where there is clarity of thought, flexibility in meeting relational
and individual needs, and a propensity to produce stability in the family. As a result,
the emotional process and patterns of the partners are replicated in the children to
produce adults who are differentiated individuals. When the partners, however, are
undifferentiated and have a high degree of emotional fusion, they produce the same
type of characteristics and patterns with their children. The lower the level of differ-
entiation in the dyad, the greater the likelihood that there will be family instability
through perpetual conflict, distancing, or blaming. Kerr and Bowen (1988) identified
three symptomatic patterns that often develop when partners are emotionally fused,
which include physical or emotional impairment of one of the partners, resulting in
the rest of the family being absorbed into the symptomatic behavior as the focus of all
relationships; chronic conflict in the marital dyad where partners are locked into cycles
of distanced and enmeshed behavior over the emotional anxiety that then dominates
the entire family; and emotional impairment of a child where the undifferentiated
partners band together to blame the child for the anxiety in the family.
Family projection process is the fourth interlocking concept in Bowen’s model.
Bowen (1978) believed there to be an uneven distribution of the parents’ anxiety to
children, and therefore some children would have an opportunity to be more differ-
entiated than siblings. In other words, all children are exposed to the same nuclear
family process and patterns, but not all children are triangulated or impaired in the
same way in the family. For the unlucky or only child of undifferentiated parents, the
projected on child receives an inordinate amount of focus or blame for the anxiety
that exists between the partners or the family. As a result, the overfocus on the child
puts him or her in a position of having more emotional instability and will grow up
with likely even less differentiation from the parents as he or she learns that the only
way to relate and survive is to be emotionally fused, demanding, and perpetually
immature in the same way the parents are immature (Papero, 1995).
The fifth interlocking concept is recognized as emotional cutoff and is one of the
processes that crosses clearly from the family into the intergenerational context as well
as other relationships individuals have in society. In the family projection process,
children who are unable to achieve some type of differentiation from their families
often try various strategies to exert or put forth their adulthood or autonomy. From
an undifferentiated position, however, the adult child will often make this autonomy
play by moving further away from the family of origin, creating barriers to make com-
munication with the family difficult or pretending as if everything in the family is okay
and attention is never again required. Although this may have an appearance of indi-
vidual autonomy, Bowen (1978) would consider it an emotional cutoff. This has the
unfortunate effect of creating a pseudo‐self of autonomy or pseudo‐maturity by phys-
ical or emotional distancing but does not alleviate the emotional fusion or the lack of
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Transgenerational Theories and Current Practice 321
differentiation. As one of my professors used to say, “an emotional cutoff is like drag-
ging the family emotional umbilical cord around with you across any distance.” In
other words, the distancing leaves intact all the emotional anxiety without much pos-
sibility of resolving such lack of differentiation. Even more damaging, however, the
distancing techniques learned in this methodology are perpetuated in partner and
other relationships and makes triangulation and the family projection process even
more likely (Kerr & Bowen, 1988).
It makes sense that as a family with undifferentiated or fused parents raise children
who were triangulated, patterned in the nuclear family process, and subjected to the
family projection process, several of those children will likely be even less differenti-
ated than the original parents. These grown children will seek out partners with
equally low levels of differentiation and perpetuate the same unfortunate triangula-
tion, family process, and impairment of their own children through family projection.
The result, generation after generation, is a further deterioration of the multigenera-
tional family and the levels of differentiation among the members. Papero (1995)
reports that although the multigenerational family may stabilize for one or two gen-
erations, there is a tendency when anxiety rises in the family to return to these long‐
standing emotionally fused reactions that spiral the family into dysfunction. This
interlocking concept is called the multigenerational transmission process.
The last two interlocking concepts in the Bowen family systems theory are sibling
position and societal regression. Bowen (1978) recognized that sibling position not
only came into play as the learned interactive patterns between marital partners were
influenced by their sibling positions of being eldest, middle, or youngest but also how
lesser differentiated parents would select potential children in terms of position in the
family projection process. In societal regression, Bowen put forth the belief that
societies—just like families—faced forces of autonomy and undifferentiation. He pos-
tulated that as societal forces produced more stressful and anxiety‐producing conse-
quences, there would be more global deterioration in terms of differentiation and
clarity of thinking (Bowen, 1978).
Like psychoanalysis, Bowen family systems theory is not as interested in problem
solving or change as much as it is in helping individuals recognize and be thoughtful
about their own differentiation and relationships. Therefore, the primary goal of the
work is to improve differentiation through helping people decrease their emotional
reactive patterns and extricate themselves from the dysfunctional patterns revealed in
the eight interlocking concepts that were present in their families of origin (Kerr &
Bowen, 1988).
Although Bowen did not focus on therapeutic techniques, there are identifiable
methods the theory utilized. First and foremost, Bowen (1978) believed the thera-
peutic posture of a therapist should be one of a coach. In this manner, the therapist is
able to give direction and inform individuals about more differentiated positions and
de‐triangulating the self from the family of origin. Although Bowen would work with
families and couples occasionally, he very much preferred that the family members
learn in conversation with him directly and not by speaking directly to one another in
the beginning stages of therapy. In this way, he believed he minimized the opportu-
nity for family members to emotionally fuse and at the same time maximized his influ-
ence in coaching the family toward more differentiated behavior (Bowen, 1978). In
recognizing the family emotional process, the projection process, emotional cutoffs,
and the multigenerational transmission process becomes evident in the technique of
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322 Terry D. Hargrave and Benjamin J. Houltberg
genograms used by many Bowen systems therapists (McGoldrick, Gerson, & Petry,
2008). Also, Bowen (1978) utilized the coaching position in helping clients practice
more differentiated behavior through improving rational thinking and communica-
tion through taking “I‐positions” and engaging in relational experiments. All of these
methods were clearly designed to help the family members and clients become
thoughtful about their processes and improve their growth by more differentiated
behaviors.
There has been some current research that has explored Bowenian concepts. For
example, Miller, Anderson, and Keals (2004) found that lower levels of differentiation
were significantly correlated with higher levels of anxiety and lower levels of marital
satisfaction. Also, Bartle‐Haring, Ferriby, and Day (2018) found that the level of dif-
ferentiation mediated the association between depressive symptoms and relationship
satisfaction. Higher levels of differentiation of self are also correlated positively with
sense of well‐being (Ross & Murdock, 2014) consistent with Bowen’s perspective of
individual and relational balance.
1 Facts are the relational influences that are primarily due to existing environmen-
tal, relational, and individual realities that are objectifiable. For example, genetic
heritage, physical health, historical facts, and specific events in the family life cycle
would be a part of this dimension.
2 Individual psychology. Individual psychology is the relational dimension that
accounts for a person’s experiences and motivations. These subjective influences
are internalized to individuals as he or she strives for recognition, love, power, and
pleasure and are motivated by the forces of aggression, mastery, or ambivalence.
3 Family or systemic interactions. This dimension is delineated by relational trans-
actions, communication, and interactions. These interactions produce a family or
systemic pattern of organization that defines power, alignments, structure, and
belief systems.
4 Relational ethics. This dimension deals with the subjective balance of trustworthi-
ness, justice, loyalty, merit, and entitlement between members of relationships. As
relational members interact, they are interdependent and relational ethics requires
them to take responsibility for actions and consequences as well as to strive for
fairness in the process of relational giving and taking.
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Transgenerational Theories and Current Practice 323
Although all four dimensions are interdependent on each other and have mutual
influence, it is the dimension of relational ethics that is the strongest and overarching
concept in the theory. Simply stated, it is the balance of fairness in the family relation-
ships between the obligations and entitlements of each member of the family. This is
instinctual to family members based on the trust that the family is committed to meet
the individual’s needs and the individual will do what it takes to perpetuate and give for
the good of the family (Boszormenyi‐Nagy & Krasner, 1986; Boszormenyi‐Nagy &
Ulrich, 1981).
When family members take part in this mutual investment of give and take—both
giving for the good of individual members and the members in turn seeking and giv-
ing to help the family survive or become stronger—a sense of trustworthiness is devel-
oped in the relationships. Trustworthiness in relationships is consistently pointed out
as the essential element in building family health and intergenerational stability
(Boszormenyi‐Nagy, Grunebaum, & Ulrich, 1991). Trust in the family process of
give and take is powerful because it allows family members to contribute and give to
one another in freedom without fear of others threatening, manipulating, or with-
drawing from them. In short, they give to each other because they trust that other
family members will give to them and meet their individual needs (Hargrave &
Pfitzer, 2003).
When there is an imbalance in this family ledger of give and take or merits and obli-
gations between family members, it is experienced by members as a violation of jus-
tice. If the injustice persists over a period of time, trustworthiness begins to deteriorate
and so does the individual freedom to give to others (Hargrave & Pfitzer, 2003). As
a result, individual members decrease or stop giving to other family members, and it
then triggers a further deterioration of trust in the family. Soon, individuals in the
family start seeking destructive ways to gain their justified entitlements that have been
neglected or ignored. Because no one in family relationships give to one another,
members begin threatening others to “make” them give what is needed, manipulating
relationships to meet their own needs, or withdrawing and giving up on the relation-
ships with the belief that people will be unable or permanently unwilling to meet their
needs. This tragic loss of trustworthiness and movement of family members to take
what they need through threat, manipulation, or withdrawal is called destructive enti-
tlement (Boszormenyi‐Nagy & Krasner, 1986).
Boszormenyi‐Nagy, of all the family‐of‐origin therapists and theorists, was most
true to the idea of a comprehensive transgenerational theory. He believed sincerely in
the idea that deficits of injustice and trustworthiness were passed along in the destruc-
tive entitlement of one generation to the next forming a revolving slate of the genera-
tional ledger (Hargrave & Pfitzer, 2003). It was this concept of the revolving slate of
the generational ledger that led Boszormenyi‐Nagy and Spark (1973) to identify the
concept of invisible loyalty. When an individual is raised in a family where there is an
unjust system where he or she is deprived of fair entitlement, the individual is likely to
carry a dysfunctional and sometimes pathological drive into the existing relationships
that can be quite destructive to both the individual and intergenerational family
(Boszormenyi‐Nagy & Krasner, 1986). For instance, as children grow in a family,
they are a part of a vertical relationship where giving from the previous generation is
asymmetrical in nature. In other words, parents give to children not because they
expect to receive giving back from the child, but because the child is fulfilled and
emotionally healthy by the love and trustworthiness given by the parents. As the child
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324 Terry D. Hargrave and Benjamin J. Houltberg
grows up and has children of his or her own, he or she then is raising a child in this
vertical, asymmetrical relationship. This adult child now gives to his or her own chil-
dren love and trustworthiness out of the resource provided by his or her parents in the
previous generation. This healthy generational giving also raises children who are
then able to engage in sound horizontal relationships or relationships where partners
engaged in balanced give and take with one another such as siblings, friends, or
spouses (Hargrave & Pfitzer, 2003).
The unpleasant rub comes when a child is raised in a situation where he or she
does not receive the just entitlement from the previous generation. The denial of
what the child needs to be loving and trustworthy sets him or her on a destructive
entitlement drive to fulfill what is needed and will include the threatening, manipu-
lating, and withdrawing from others. Further, he or she will be indiscriminate in this
destructive entitlement expecting innocent parties such as his/her own spouse, chil-
dren, or friends to make up for the entitlement lost in the vertical relationship. The
invisible loyalty to family of origin, and more importantly the generational revolving
slate, makes the behavior of the destructive and dysfunctional person most profound
as he or she desperately tries to fulfill their own quest for entitlement. Worse still, the
partners and children of this person are impaired and cheated out of their fair love
and trustworthiness. Thus, the drumbeat of dysfunctional families proceeds in a
downward spiral through the generations (Boszormenyi‐Nagy & Krasner, 1986;
Hargrave & Pfitzer, 2003).
The crux of the therapeutic effort in contextual family therapy is multidirected par-
tiality. As Boszormenyi‐Nagy and Krasner (1986) point out, it is not simply a thera-
peutic methodology or intervention strategy, but instead is a central theme for the
therapist as he or she seeks to understand the story of all those who have a genera-
tional ledger stake in the family and be partial and trustworthy in holding parties
accountable and responsible (Hargrave & Pfitzer, 2003).
There are four primary methods used in the process of multidirected partiality
(Goldenthal, 1996). The first is empathy, and it is perhaps the most well‐recognized
methodology in the therapeutic field. When the therapist reflects empathy while lis-
tening to the client story, he or she expresses connections to the client’s loss, fear, and
pain (Goldenthal, 1996). The second methodology in multidirected partiality is cred-
iting and involves the therapist openly acknowledging the unfair violations and rela-
tional insults the client has experienced in the family. In addition, the therapist credits
the client efforts to be loving and trustworthy amidst receiving insufficient resource
from the family. In other words, recognizing the client for giving when he or she has
not received fair and just entitlement. When this is done in conjunction with empathy,
it further builds a trustworthy alliance between the therapist and the client
(Boszormenyi‐Nagy et al., 1991). Acknowledgment of efforts is the next aspect of
multidirected partiality and involves the therapist recognizing the successful loving
and trustworthy efforts not only of the client but also of the family that might have
been well meaning, but went awry because of destructive coping (Goldenthal, 1996).
For example, many times family members get angry or manipulative in relationships
in an effort to force more responsible or just behavior from others. Finally, multidi-
rected partiality involves accountability. This aspect involves the therapist holding the
client as well as the other relational parties—both present and not present in the
room—responsible for the actions and behaviors that caused damage to relationships
and resulted in violations of love and trustworthiness (Hargrave & Pfitzer, 2003).
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Transgenerational Theories and Current Practice 325
The practice of multidirected partiality in the therapy room provides an initial infu-
sion of trustworthiness and insight to the family member or members. As this trust-
worthiness grows, members are then able to acknowledge not only the pain in other’s
stories but increasingly take responsibility for their own destructive actions. In short,
family members start making efforts toward giving to one another amidst the atmos-
phere of understanding and trustworthiness. This action creates an equally powerful
inclining spiral of love and trustworthiness as giving results in more family trustwor-
thiness and more family trustworthiness begets even more giving. The way out of
family and individual dysfunction, therefore, is utilizing multidirected partiality in
order to create ample trustworthiness to start building a legacy of health and giving
(Hargrave & Pfitzer, 2003). As such, contextual family therapy clearly acknowledges
the power of the past in shaping the inter‐ and intrapsyche of the individual and family
and builds a methodology of insight and understanding in order to promote healthier
individuals and family relationships.
Contextual therapy has less research that is not associated specifically with examples
and case studies, but there has been encouraging work in terms of identifying core
practices of the approach from observations of both Boszormenyi‐Nagy and current
practitioners (Meiden, Noordegraaf, & Ewijk, 2017, 2018). Also, Hargrave, Jennings,
and Anderson (1991) developed a Relational Ethics Scale to validate constructs in the
theory. This scale was then used to identify a positive correlation between trust and
justice in relationships and marital satisfaction (Hargrave & Bomba, 1993). Likewise,
the Relational Ethics Scale was used and was significant as a predictor of marital satis-
faction, and in turn, marital satisfaction was significantly associated with depression
and health problems (Grames, Miller, Robinson, Higgins, & Hinton, 2008). Finally,
the same scale was used in a study to measure a sense of fairness and relationship sat-
isfaction, which revealed that lower sense of fairness was correlated significantly with
lower relational satisfaction (Gangamma, Bartle‐Haring, & Glebova, 2012). All of
these findings are supportive of the constructs of contextual therapy.
of the child’s feelings toward the parent results in the intrapsychic conflict of splitting
(Framo, 1981).
Key to the object relations analytic perspective, these splits of the object (the par-
ent) are held by the child as introjects, or internalized objects and beliefs about the
objects held in the psyche. In the internalized psychic world of the child, the child
learns to control and deal with the conflicting splits of the internalized parent or
object (Fairbairn, 1952). Framo (1981) believed these parental introjects were among
the toughest to change in therapy, and the greater the parental neglect or rejection of
the child, the more resistant the internalized object and splits would be to change as
the child grows into an adult. Further, as the child turns to an adult and seeks a mate,
he or she does not select a partner that is desired as much as a partner that matches
the internalized objects and splits that which already exists in the psyche. In this way,
the individual seeks a pair bond that holds out the hope of the love represented in the
best of the internalized parent, but also a partner who holds some of the same reject-
ing or neglecting attitudes of the worst part of the internalized parent. The individual,
therefore, recreates their own split‐internalized representation in their current family
relationships in an effort to work out, albeit unconsciously, the desired love of the
internalized best parent and resolve or eliminate the worst characteristics of object or
parent in the context of the current relationship (Framo, 1992).
The most damaging part of this process in producing conflictual marriages is the
process of projective identification, wherein the partners project their expectations and
resentments of their internalized object parents, or the disowned part of themselves
that are much like the hated part of the internalized parent. Although this process is
evident with partners first, children of the partners are particularly vulnerable as
objects of this projections. As a result, children cannot get the projecting parent to
love him or her because the parent has projected a “bad” introject onto the child and
expects the child to somehow work this out on his or her own to provide the parent
with unconditional love. In this way, partners and children become substitutes for the
rigid introjects of the individuals past family of origin (Framo, 1981). In turn, it is
easy to see how this process is then replicated from generation to generation as inad-
equate parents produce splitting of the internalized parental object in their children
where the process is then repeated.
Therapeutically, it was not unusual for Framo to meet with the entire family first in
order to free children from carrying symptoms or responsibilities caused by the pro-
jections of the parents. Once this was achieved, the clear focus of the therapy became
about undoing the projections of the past in the partnering or marital relationship of
the parents (Framo, 1982). Framo (1992) would most often meet with partners in
conjoint sessions first to help the partners articulate and understand their frustrations
and internalizations of their objects. But very quickly in the process, Framo would
move these partners into the context of group marital therapy, most often consisting
of three couples. In addition to hearing and understanding the influences of the past
from each member and the subsequent introjects, splitting, and projections, group
members would learn from seeing the interactional patterns acted out by other cou-
ples. As a result, members would also see how the same or similar dynamics or pat-
terns were at work in their own relationship as well as seeing the insights and new
possibilities brought to light by the therapist. Couples were also encouraged to give
each other positive feedback as well as insight into certain issues the couple might be
experiencing. Besides the positive aspects of any group experience, Framo also believed
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Transgenerational Theories and Current Practice 327
that the couple marital group then set the stage and reduced resistance in preparation
for the final stage of the treatment: the meeting of the individual with the family of
origin (Framo, 1992).
Framo (1981, 1992) clearly felt that the most powerful way to loosen the bonds
of the good/bad introjects and projections was not through the insight, understand-
ing, and comments from the therapist or others, but to deal directly with one’s family
of origin in a session with as many original family members as possible. As such,
Framo serves as an important bridge from the insight‐based transgenerational theo-
ries into more of the experience‐based approach that evolved into the experiential
therapies. In the family‐of‐origin meetings, the therapist (or co‐therapists) would
meet with one of the individuals with the couple and his or her family of origin for
usually two two‐hour sessions. The goals of the sessions were to explore how the
beliefs or perceptions formulated in the family of origin found their way into the
projections in current relationships and to have corrective experiences with the fam-
ily of origin. In many cases, individuals had misunderstandings or misperceptions of
the problems in the family of origin, and these could be addressed through the clari-
fications and explanations of the family members. Rather than being a platform for
blame, the meetings would often be a place where misunderstandings could be
cleared up overtly and messages of love and care could be expressed. But even when
this was not the case, individuals had the positive outcomes of talking out their past
beliefs and projections and came to a better understanding that the issues clearly
belonged in the relational realm of the family of origin instead of the intrapsychic
aspect of the individual (Framo, 1992).
In working with the family of origin directly, the individual had the grip of the
internalized objects loosened. As a result, the individual can then see more clearly the
reality of the family‐of‐origin parents and realize that these objects were never totally
the rigid splits that were internalized, but rather real people who are imperfect but still
able to love and connect. With this revision of the introject, the individual is finally
able to release a good part of the old projections and is free to behave and act in a
more beneficial manner toward the partner and the children (Framo, 1981). In this
way, the individual, partnering relationship, and children can have a changed experi-
ence without the unconscious introjects of the past. For the individual, the anxiety of
the split is resolved by both the insight and understanding gained in therapy and the
new liberating experiences gained in the family‐of‐origin sessions. Although imperfect
in many cases, the process of interacting in the conjoint therapy, group marital ther-
apy, and family‐of‐origin sessions is restorative and healing for the intergenerational
family (Framo, 1992).
Experiential Theories
Banmen, Gerber, & Gomori, 1991; Whitaker & Bumberry, 1988). This fundamental
concept is very close to and was likely influenced by the outlook that the d
ifferentiation
of self results in the ability to practice not only autonomy but also togetherness in a
family context (Bowen, 1978). Second, there was a high stock put into clarity of
expression in the here and now among the experiential founders (Satir, 1964). Again,
this goal is consistent with the transgenerational theories to root out past loyalties and
projections in order to make more informed and clearer choices in relating. Finally,
the experiential founders placed a premium on growth and individual freedom (Satir
et al., 1991; Whitaker & Bumberry, 1988). Clearly, although the transgenerational
founders did not express it in the exact language, the therapeutic goal was to direct
change into a less dysfunctional system where healthy individuals could flourish
(Boszormenyi‐Nagy & Ulrich, 1981; Framo, 1981; Kerr & Bowen, 1988).
The experiential founders, however, expanded the framework of family therapy
from decreasing the focus on conflict and anxiety to the focus of human growth and
freedom (Satir et al., 1991; Whitaker & Keith, 1981). This was a natural outgrowth
of their phenomenological influence from focusing more on the aspects of humanistic
psychology in the tradition of Gestalt and person‐centered therapies instead of the
more traditional psychoanalytic approach (Goldenberg & Goldenberg, 2013). Still,
both Whitaker and Satir put the family of origin as the primary block to overcome in
the work to growth (Satir et al., 1991; Whitaker & Keith, 1981). As such, the family
dynamic of the past plays a central role in the systemic nature of these experiential
theories. The primary evolution of the experiential theories, therefore, was not so
much the focus of the goal of therapy but rather the way these therapists worked to
produce change and growth. Traditional transgenerational theories focused on
thought processes, understanding, and insight to interpret and clarify family‐of‐origin
dynamics to produce change. In the experiential iteration of the evolution, these
models emphasized the actual emotional experience in the therapy room as the pri-
mary methodology of change, thereby opening the opportunity for freedom and
growth in the individual (Satir, 1982). Indeed, Whitaker and Bumberry (1988)
almost held the practice of theoretically driven techniques and rational thinking as an
avenue to change in contempt and much preferred the practice of being and doing in
the room. As Whitaker said many times in a variety of settings, “Anything worth
knowing cannot be taught; therefore, anything worth knowing must be learned” (C.
Whitaker, personal communication, August 23, 1991). Clearly, the experiential evo-
lution of dealing with family of origin was driven by doing and trying new experiences
rather than clinical interpretation.
Symbolic experiential therapy always values the freedom and choice of the individ-
ual, and growth is seen as developing in healthy groups as a natural process of crisis
due to developmental changes. Issues of individual and family health such as clear
generational boundaries, the flexible distribution of power among members, the free-
dom to express individual beliefs and differences, and the ability to problem solve are
negotiated via the pathway of actual experiences of going through these challenges
together (Whitaker & Keith, 1981). On the other hand, family dysfunction often
presents itself when parents struggle over which family of origin of the partners is
going to govern or influence the family more, a rigid structure of rules that must be
obeyed by all members and an inability to operate outside of the homeostatic expecta-
tions. Further, all members of the family are equally affected in a pathological or
dysfunctional family. Particular members may be scapegoated, but the entire group
bears the marks of the problem behavior (Whitaker & Bumberry, 1988).
Specific issues may bring the family to therapy, but the symbolic experiential thera-
pist most often sees the symptom only in the context of helping the individuals and
family negotiate to a larger goal of freedom and growth. As such, each experience
between therapist and family is essential in formulating new opportunities for choice
and growth (Keith, 2000). The first stage of the symbolic experiential therapy process
is the battle for structure in which the family must capitulate its role to operate the way
it likes and is used to in favor of the therapist’s mode of operating. The next stage is
the battle for initiative in which the therapist is nondirective toward the family in get-
ting information or story concerning their issues. The therapist in this model makes it
clear that he or she is committed to his or her own growth in the therapy process.
While this serves as a model of responsibility, the family members are left on their own
to reveal their own processes and thoughts (Whitaker & Keith, 1981).
Experiential therapists in general, but particularly symbolic experiential therapists,
do not structure interactions or tasks or even endeavor to gain much content or his-
tory concerning the family. The focus of the therapy is clearly to confront the process
that is happening in front of the therapists during the session. Once the family mem-
bers show part of this process, symbolic experiential therapists will engage the process
using metaphor, teasing, humor, free association, fantasy, and confrontation in order to
increase the family confusion, prompting the family members to find a different way
to resolve the stress (Whitaker & Keith, 1981). For example, when a client in a family
states, “I am the black sheep of the family,” a therapist might respond, “Well, that is
fortunate for you that you don’t shear off your black wool just to become another
mindless sheep following your family. Isn’t there something about that makes you the
special one in the family?” Such a challenge forces the family into disequilibrium as
they now will likely attribute forming a coalition against the “black sheep” as being
mindlessly influenced and the “black sheep” having to reckon with the advantages of
having more freedom of choice. The point is that the family is actively challenged
through their discussions and interactions with the therapist to have to modify their
processes and move more toward family health, boundaries between generations,
adapting and balancing new ways of expressing and connecting to one another and
growing (Keith, 2000).
Although research evidence for outcomes in this approach are scant, clinically sym-
bolic experiential therapists believe that this process, experience‐based approach, has
the power to change any family with virtually any diagnosis. They maintain systemi-
cally that since causation is circular, change has the same characteristic (Whitaker &
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330 Terry D. Hargrave and Benjamin J. Houltberg
Keith, 1981). Many times, Whitaker referred to his work as the “therapy of the
absurd” because he saw the entire family as his client and would go to any lengths—
stretching the bounds of accepted therapeutic practice—in order to invade the normal
but dysfunctional family process to produce new growth and adaptations (C. Whitaker,
personal communication August 23, 1991). He saw symptoms and anxiety as oppor-
tunities for growth and would model fantasy alternatives in order to get the family
unstuck (Whitaker & Keith, 1981). Like the transgenerational theories, Whitaker
would use the anxiety as a force to bring about change. From our perspective, he was
part shaman and part stand‐up comedian, but he certainly created experiences wherein
families and individuals were prompted to change and grow.
The final factor that plays into the Satir model is the mind–body interaction and was
represented in her work by the mind–body–feeling triad. Satir felt mind, body, and feel-
ings take on meaning to the individual, and the person either overemphasizes certain
elements of the triad because it feels comfortable or de‐emphasizes other elements
because it is neglected and disliked (Satir et al., 1991). For instance, a person who is
very strong intellectually may have a tendency to put down their body’s value or attrac-
tiveness and/or pay little attention to the emotional self. Satir would call attention to
these various parts in almost a Gestalt manner with an emphasis on encouragement and
nurturing to help individuals embrace and integrate their whole selves and recognize
the growth that occurs because of such balance (Satir & Baldwin, 1983).
One additional element that played an essential role in the Satir model was the
communication styles. Satir (1972) believes that interaction styles that individuals
take on in relationships are good representations of their feelings and identities. She
identified these styles by paying attention to the way the clients attended to them-
selves (self), the other person (others), and the situation and circumstances in the
environment (context). In turn, Satir had a sculpting stance for each style that she
would utilize in therapy to promote awareness and growth. A person well in tune with
self, others, and context would be identified as a congruent style. Individuals in touch
with others and context but not with self would likely be a placating style and be
prone to be weak, self‐condemning, and apologizing for self. Those who are in touch
with self and context but not others would have a blamer style and likely display
behaviors that were dominating, angry, and self‐justifying. Individuals only in touch
with context at the expense of self and others would be identified as having a super‐
reasonable style and would likely be out of touch with emotions while acting distant
and uninvolved. Finally, those who are out of touch with others, self, and context
would likely display a style that is irrelevant and would represent behavior that is
unable to relate and distracting in relationship (Satir, 1972).
Satir was a master therapist and extremely nurturing in the room. Her focus in ther-
apy was constantly in propelling the individuals and family members into growth of
identity and self in the here‐and‐now experience with her. Some of the techniques she
used were pointing out incongruence in the mind–body connection of the client—
often using body parts as metaphors of communication—as well as making overt family‐
of‐origin rules, power alignments, and threats people felt. She would help individuals
confront these issues with therapeutic touch and support while encouraging new behav-
iors, relational experiments, and evaluation that represented clarity and strength of self
(Satir et al., 1991). In addition, she would often utilize family sculpting and family
reconstruction in her work. In a profoundly effective family‐of‐origin application that
was experiential, she would represent the primary survival triad utilizing communica-
tion stances and styles illustrating roles of family members. She would then teach, illus-
trate, experiment, suggest, and give feedback to members to create additional possibilities
within the here‐and‐now experience and promote growth (Satir & Baldwin, 1983).
There has been very little research on the experiential approaches of Whitaker and
Satir. Outside of case studies and examples, core variables in the symbolic experiential
theory have been identified (Mitten & Connell, 2004), but little progress has been
made how these are utilized in therapy or produce change. In the Satir model, there
has been a scale developed reflecting the theory’s idea of congruence (Lee, 2002) as
well as a study that reported significant improvement in family roles and relationships
after participation in a group focused on the model (Pan, 2000).
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332 Terry D. Hargrave and Benjamin J. Houltberg
It is our belief that theory development is still evolving from the transgenerational and
experiential theories that represent much of our heritage in SFT. The increased focus
of contemporary research on the physiological and neurobiological aspects of emotion
regulation and benefits of mindfulness have expanded the understanding of how family
processes can shape emotions in patterned ways and introduces new possibilities for
intervention. Emotion regulation involves the modulation of the occurrence, duration,
and intensity of internal states of feeling (positive and negative) as well as physiological
processes and is critical for emotional and relational health (Morris, Criss, Silk, &
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Transgenerational Theories and Current Practice 333
Houltberg, 2017). Much of what people learn about emotions and emotion regula-
tion derives from their family of origin and become the emotional scripts for how they
interact in current relationships. Although definitions of mindfulness may vary, there
has been mounting empirical support for the importance of cultivating practices of a
nonjudgmental, present‐moment awareness of physiological, emotional, and bodily
experiences (Shapiro & Carlson, 2009). Mindful practice increases a person’s aware-
ness of their own emotional reactivity and allows them the opportunity to respond
more intentionally rather than automatically out of patterned behaviors.
Emotionally focused therapy (EFT) (Johnson, 2004) and restoration therapy (RT)
(Hargrave & Pfitzer, 2011) are two theories that represent the evolution of transgenera-
tional and experiential theories that integrate current research from neuroscience on
understanding how the brain is shaped by systemic relationships and also has patterned
itself into preferred predictable reactions in dealing with emotional pain (Hanna, 2014).
Both of these theories are rooted in the tradition of transgenerational therapies main-
taining that the past and early attachments are key in understanding current emotions
and behaviors. Also, both theories carry on the experiential tradition of working with
these past influences in the here and now as evidenced with the therapist encouraging
relational partners interacting, using interactions and empathy to produce change, and
engaging in role play and imagery for the purpose of fostering client growth and change.
Both theories identify emotion regulation processes of pain as being the key to
break up old patterns and move into new possibilities of change (Baumeister &
Tierney, 2012; Siegel, 2015). Further, both cultivate a mindfulness practice to pro-
duce emotion awareness, flexibility, and regulation that are critical to consolidating
changes and growth both inside the therapy session and eventual habituation when
therapy ceases. In this way, both of these theories maintain insight, understanding,
and connection as part of the therapeutic practice, but explicitly identify emotion
regulation and mindful practice as being the key elements for behavioral and thera-
peutic change (Hanna, 2014; Hargrave & Pfitzer, 2011; Johnson, 2004).
EFT and RT are heavily influenced by attachment theory (Ainsworth, 1967; Bowlby,
1969) and are appreciated much in SFT in understanding how past family‐of‐origin
and attachment relationships play out in current relationships. People and especially
young children are in need of secure attachment figures that provide emotional sup-
port, encouragement, love, and predictability. When these qualities are absent in par-
ents of young children, the result leaves emotional pain in the child, resulting in
detachment, disconnection, frustration, anger, and depression (Ainsworth, 1967;
Bowlby, 1969). Without this emotionally secure base to be fostered by parents, people
grow into adults who carry this same emotional pain or attachment styles as well as
negative reactions into partnering and family relationships negatively affecting con-
nections and relational satisfaction (Johnson, 2004).
Restoration therapy
RT is a relatively new model of systemic marriage and family therapy developed by
Terry Hargrave and Franz Pfitzer and is heavily influenced by contextual family ther-
apy, attachment theory, cognitive therapy, and mindfulness research. In RT, the thera-
pist sees the primary emotions as relating to identity, which is developed in the context
of how the individual was loved in relationship, and safety, which is developed by the
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Transgenerational Theories and Current Practice 335
Conclusion
From the beginning of therapeutic processes, there has been a focus on early family‐
of‐origin relationships and how the dynamics of interactions and emotions have
shaped individuals in the transgenerational process. Here, we have tried to clearly
articulate how those processes in the transgenerational theories are indeed still alive in
present in therapy, albeit evolved through the experiential therapies and more cur-
rently in the therapies that also integrate the physical and neurobiological dimensions.
We are still focusing on the past in SFT and will do so for a long time to come.
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336 Terry D. Hargrave and Benjamin J. Houltberg
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