Listening
Listening
Listening
Listening
Was I paying
attention?
Most people
tend to be
"hard of
listening"
rather than
"hard of
hearing."
Listening
.
.
.
.
. . is intermittent.
. . is a learned skill.
. . is active.
. . implies using the message
received.
Types of Listening
Active vs. Passive
Positive vs. Negative
What Kind is it?
Appreciative
Empathic
Discriminative
Analytical
Listening Importance
Good listeners
Interactive Listening
Effective Listening
Effective listening requires an
understanding that it is not just the
speaker's responsibility to make sure
he/she is understood.
The listener has a major role to play in
hearing the complete message.
The following ideas will assist the listener
in understanding the message.
1.Stop talking! You cannot listen when you are talking. You will only be thinking about what you
are going to say next instead of paying attention to what the other person is trying to say.
Consciously focus your attention on the speaker.
2.Put the speaker at ease: Relax, smile, look at the speaker and help that person feel free to talk.
Look and act interested. Remove distractions: turn off the TV; close the door; stop what you are
doing, and pay attention.
3.Pay attention to the nonverbal language of physical gestures, facial expressions, tone of voice,
and body posture. An authority on nonverbal language says that 55 percent of the message
meaning is nonverbal, 38 percent is indicated by tone of voice, and only 7 percent is conveyed by
the words used in a spoken message. Few people know how to listen to the eyes; what a tapping
foot means; a furrowed brow; clenched fist; the biting of nails. These often reveal the key feelings
behind the words.
4.Listen for what is not said. Ask questions to clarify the meaning of words and the feelings
involved, or ask the speaker to enlarge on the statement. People often find it difficult to speak up
about matters or experiences that are very important or highly emotional for them. Listen for how
the speaker presents the message. What people hesitate to say is often the most critical point.
5.Know exactly what the other person is saying. Reflect back what the other person has said in a
"shared meaning" experience
so you completely understand the meaning and content of the
message before you reply to it. A good listener does not assume they understand the other
person. You, as the listener, should not express your views until you have summarized the
speaker's message to his satisfaction.
Conclusion
"What is so important about listening? I listen!"
Sure you do. But how? How adept are you, for example,
in getting people to come right out and really talk to you?
Before you can get the most out of a listening situation,
others must first believe that you really want to listen.
They must feel that when they tell you something, it will
be received by you in the proper spirit.
Learn to listen beyond the words, with your heart as well
as your ears.
Observe the signs of the inner feelings such as voice
quality, facial expressions, body posture and motions,
etc. These actions are revealing, and sometimes may
have an opposite meaning from the spoken word.
A friend put it this way: "You listened as if you wanted to
hear what I was going to say, as if it was really important
to you. And that makes me feel good!"