Bridesmaid applauded after demanding bride provide 'spreadsheet' of expenses for bridal party
- A maid of honor complained about ballooning costs of being in a bridal party
- She asked a bride for an upfront expectation of how much it will cost
- READ MORE: Bride sparks debate after washing makeup off before ceremony
Weddings are an expensive event for everyone involved, but one bride has sparked controversy after expecting her bridal party to cover huge financial costs of her pre-wedding events.
One woman, who was asked to be her friend's maid of honor for her big day, revealed she was worried she overstepped her role after asking the bride to draw up a spreadsheet to detail the astronomical costs of the wedding-associated events for each bridesmaid.
'When asking us to be in the wedding party, the bride made it clear she expected bridesmaids to pay for our dresses, alterations, and to be present for the rehearsal and wedding,' the woman explained in the Reddit post, shared to the Am I The A**hole Subreddit.
'She offered to either pay for makeup OR hair for me (MOH) but said the bridesmaids can pay extra to have those done the day of the event,' she explained.
The maid of honor explained the bride is only 24, and so are most of the other bridesmaids, so are 'in the broke post-grad mindset' - which is hindering the planning of the bridal activities, like the bachelorette party.
'I have been figuring out how to do a more cost efficient but fun event, [but] the costs are definitely adding up,' she anxiously wrote.
The woman explained the other bridesmaids have expressed concern about escalating costs, and she shares their concerns.
However, when she spoke with the bride she suggested that it would be easiest for the bridesmaids to understand the total costs they’re expected to incur for the wedding, including dress, alterations, bridal shower, bachelorette, and any incidentals.
Weddings are an expensive event for everyone involved, but one bride has sparked controversy after expecting her bridal party to cover huge financial costs of her pre-wedding events (stock image)
'I argued (politely) that we need to have an idea of what’s expected of us, and it’s not on us to create/manage the budget for her wedding,' she explained.
In addition to planning the bachelorette, the maid of honor has also been tasked with planning the bridal shower - but didn't realize the bride expected her to financially bear the burden too.
'I (kind of stupidly) offered to host the bridal shower because of the number of people who the bride wants to attend and my home has the capacity,' she explained. 'Damn. I didn’t realize this would loop me in financially.'
'Again, no budget,' she complained. 'I am hosting and the bride sent over a list of [around] 30 people who will be attending.'
The MOH added she has 'no idea' what the budget is, making it difficult to plan the event.
'I asked for a clear spreadsheet of our expected expenses so I can speak with the bridesmaids and make a plan,' she shared.
'Is it normal for bridesmaids to not know what’s expected of them? I don’t know much about weddings or being MOH and want her to have an amazing wedding without breaking the bank for the other ladies,' the woman shared.
After speaking with the bride, the bridal party was given an estimate of $1,000 each.
'This is much higher than the initial $100 on a dress and alterations,' she pointed out.
The maid of honor explained the bride is only 24, and so are most of the other bridesmaids, so are in the 'in the broke post-grad mindset' - which is hindering the planning of the bridal activities, like the bachelorette (stock image)
Reddit users agreed that the bridesmaids shouldn't be wildly out of pocket to cover someone else's wedding.
'I am meeting with the bridesmaids next week to determine THEIR comfort level with the budget. I am going to bring some suggestions based on what they’ve paid so fair and bring that back to the bride,' she shared.
'I won’t expect anything of the bridesmaids beyond what they’ve agreed with the bachelorette,' she continued, concluding her post with: 'I’m never saying yes to MOH again.'
Reddit users agreed that the bridesmaids shouldn't be wildly out of pocket to cover someone else's wedding.
'I'm from the US and wedding expenses are getting out of hand. It's awful to expect your friends and family to shell out thousands for your wedding,' one person wrote.
'NTA. Tell her the budget or the highway. Stand up to her. I don’t care she is the bride. She is rude and entitled if she can’t give it to you. Some people have a thing called a budget,' pointed out another.
'NTA and it’s incredibly entitled to expect others to fork out thousands to be part of your special day. We all know how expensive life has become,' a third user agreed.
