As someone who didn’t grow up in this country but has now lived here for 18 years, the amount of eggshells and ‘triggers’ that I see mentioned all aroAs someone who didn’t grow up in this country but has now lived here for 18 years, the amount of eggshells and ‘triggers’ that I see mentioned all around me is mind boggling. Long before I read this book I have strongly held the belief that mere words should not be topics of intense debates or news pieces. The sheer number of examples in the book is eye opening. Hard lines need to be drawn between physical danger versus implicating someone and calling them out on social media because someone “felt” threatened. This latter trend has gone way out of hand. I’m relieved and glad that the authors have taken a stand and that so many people agree!
Everybody’s life will dramatically improve if people would quit taking to social/media and crying that “I was called < insert whatever word feels insulting and offending to them> which made me feel < insert personal interpretations>”. Once we go down the rabbit hole of allowing people to complain about their interpretations of words, there’s no stopping on that slippery slope. Those professors should not have had to resign just because the angry mobs wouldn’t quit talking that they used the word “mold” or “make your own rules”. We live in a country where businesses make fake AI demos to raise capital and get away with it. Making fun of top ranking politicians gets you on the pedestal in the opposing party’s camp. But heaven forbid someone uses a word that offends some student even if unintentionally? And apologize all you want after, good luck keeping your job? Seriously? For using 'mold'?
Much better to give people the benefit of the doubt, interpret their actions and intentions charitably, and work intentionally on challenging goals and on architecting our own lives rather than playing mental gymnastics. Who’s going to go to the Olympics, win medals, and keep America at the top of the medal tally if the young generation is going to be weak, too safe, sheltered in their bubbles, be allergic to every other food category, and be offended if someone tells them to work out and get fitter? This book should be required reading for everybody. It’s high time we became anti-fragile....more
The author tries to put a modern spin on age-old wisdom from "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie, "7 Habits of Highly EffectiveThe author tries to put a modern spin on age-old wisdom from "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie, "7 Habits of Highly Effective People" by Steven Covey, and from a more recent work "Never Split the Difference" by Chris Voss. Ultimately it's all about (view spoiler)[empathy (hide spoiler)], and about the idea of (view spoiler)[win win, or no deal (hide spoiler)]. The author tries to put modern day sensitivities and sensibilities into perspective but the underlying idea is the same. If it's your first book into communicating effectively, by all means have at it. If you've read the aforementioned books, you may spare yourself the money and time. As long as the intention is pure and not manipulation, being able to draw on empathy and vulnerability is a good tool to have in one's social skills tool-belt. Finally, the title is hyperbole. It's more about trying to be a more effective communicator, because it doesn't talk about winning over 1 million people to your way of thinking, but rather having a dialogue in situations where people lie on the opposite sides of chasms (and may still disagree with you after you've tried 'supercommunicating')....more
Liked it a lot! Being able to think in terms of scientific concepts in everyday life's scenarios can be a game changer. It can make it possible to deaLiked it a lot! Being able to think in terms of scientific concepts in everyday life's scenarios can be a game changer. It can make it possible to deal with difficult situations as well as improve everyday interactions....more
Real talk, no fluff, from the 'original' motivational speaker, the mentor of modern day mentors.Real talk, no fluff, from the 'original' motivational speaker, the mentor of modern day mentors....more
[update: many of these laws seem contrived, as in post-analysis after the fact. Many also contradict each other. I wouldn’t overthink the lessons] Whi[update: many of these laws seem contrived, as in post-analysis after the fact. Many also contradict each other. I wouldn’t overthink the lessons] While I, not being a politician, not being power hungry, and being a generally easy-going individual, would hardly ever _use_ many of these laws, the book makes it abundantly clear in the premise that it's talking about what people _already do_ out there in the world in order to gain power. Understanding those power dynamics and being able to detect if someone's trying to pull one over one's eyes is a good skill to be gained from the mostly entertaining stories in there. Some of the stories aren't even about power; they're about using common sense to direct where to invest one's time and energy....more
At first the authors sounded a bit sensationalistic to me, emphasizing how anything that ever gets done these days gets done because people are using At first the authors sounded a bit sensationalistic to me, emphasizing how anything that ever gets done these days gets done because people are using drugs of some kind. But I gave the book a chance and it got good really fast. I've read enough of similar literature that the concepts weren't a surprise for me, but it is a great comprehensive treatment nonetheless. I like books that can be summarized into bullet lists that one can look at regularly and realign oneself to the teachings quickly. It is indeed becoming increasingly important to mindfully and intentionally navigate life and society and I can definitely recommend this one....more
Well this was a Kwik read (ha). A good compendium of psychological tricks for better learning, but most of them common sense. As someone who's read quWell this was a Kwik read (ha). A good compendium of psychological tricks for better learning, but most of them common sense. As someone who's read quite a bit of this kind of literature before, to me the book tried to oversell the 'limitless' part of the promise....more
Reminded me of Mind Gym: An Athlete's Guide to Inner Excellence by Gary Mack. I've always liked how books on sports, health, and fitness make me feel,Reminded me of Mind Gym: An Athlete's Guide to Inner Excellence by Gary Mack. I've always liked how books on sports, health, and fitness make me feel, and this was no exception. Besides being motivational, bonus points for also talking about what sportsmanship means. Worth listening to at the gym and on the way to the gym repeatedly....more
I think this book's greatest achievement is that it presents a handful of keywords to users that can be used in everyday life to realign the user's beI think this book's greatest achievement is that it presents a handful of keywords to users that can be used in everyday life to realign the user's behavior. The details are present in the book for someone who wants them, but constantly remembering the tools and the associated higher forces is practical. The content isn't new, and some of the description even borders on eliciting a response such as 'are you serious?'. Like everything else in life, take what you want from this book, leave what you don't like, and move on. Reiterating that the material isn't new, but the 'interface' is, and I liked that novelty, despite some of the justifications being borderline dogmatic. I couldn't relate with the inner-shadow inner-authority concept for some reason, for example....more
Dealing with our own minds is one of the biggest challenges we face in the modern society. I've been using the Headspace app for a while, and this booDealing with our own minds is one of the biggest challenges we face in the modern society. I've been using the Headspace app for a while, and this book just highlights and justifies some of the techniques taught by Andy P. Mind over matter has always been a mantra of successful people, but this is more than just motivation - this work teaches you to deal with anything and everything....more
Interesting how you wouldn't guess from the title that the core of the advice from this book boils down to just one word/idea, and an obvious one at tInteresting how you wouldn't guess from the title that the core of the advice from this book boils down to just one word/idea, and an obvious one at that. However, the additional finer details are also well worth it....more
"We do not rise to the level of our goals, we fall to the level of our habits". Reminds me of Jeff Bezos's "Good intentions aren't enough; you need go"We do not rise to the level of our goals, we fall to the level of our habits". Reminds me of Jeff Bezos's "Good intentions aren't enough; you need good mechanisms" (https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=...)...more
Science confirming what one mostly hears as part of pep talk or self-help literature, i.e. don't stress about stress (unless it's life-threatening strScience confirming what one mostly hears as part of pep talk or self-help literature, i.e. don't stress about stress (unless it's life-threatening stress, it's "good", challenging stress that can actually make you perform better)?? I'll take it....more
While we all know that patience and perseverance bear fruit and bring back amazing rewards, the book does have a kind of freshness to it, in that it'sWhile we all know that patience and perseverance bear fruit and bring back amazing rewards, the book does have a kind of freshness to it, in that it's full of examples and findings that are more than just preaching. I also liked some of the practical ways described about implementing grit in daily life, e.g. in the form of low level/mid level/high level goals, etc., and not getting too hung up on losing out on lower level goals as long as you still keep moving toward the higher level goals. The outside-in view for parents was also instructional. In the end it does end up stating the obvious, but I personally get a kick out of these kinds of books. The scientific breakdown of how to achieve grit from the inside out as well as from the outside in was refreshing. Tends to be a little bit repetitive though....more
While the psychological insight into the importance of Csikszentmihaly's 'flow' is valuable, I'd have liked a bit more on how to achieve said flow relWhile the psychological insight into the importance of Csikszentmihaly's 'flow' is valuable, I'd have liked a bit more on how to achieve said flow reliably and repeatedly than 'seek out adventure' and 'seek out company'. Also tends to be heavily occupied by anecdotes from skiing and snowboarding, so I think enthusiasts of those sports would enjoy it a lot. A decent piece of work....more
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