AH

“I ONLY steal because my dear old family needs the money to live!”

Locke Lamora made this proclamation with his wineglass held high; he and the other Gentlemen Bastards were seated at the old witchwood table in the opulent burrow beneath the House of Perelandro; Calo and Galdo on his right, Jean and Bug on his left. A huge spread of food was set before them, and the celestial chandelier swung overhead with its familiar golden light. The others began to jeer.

“Liar!” they chorused in unison.

“I only steal because this wicked world won’t let me work an honest trade!” Calo cried, hoisting his own glass.

“Liar!”

“I only steal because I have to support my poor lazy twin brother, whose indolence broke our mother’s heart!” Galdo elbowed Calo as he made this announcement.

“Liar!”

“I only steal,” said Jean, “because I’ve temporarily fallen in with bad company.”

“Liar!”

At last the ritual came to Bug; the boy raised his glass a bit shakily and yelled, “I only steal because it’s heaps of fucking fun!”

“BASTARD!”
― Scott Lynch, The Lies of Locke Lamora

“What in Tink's contractual hell are you doing here?”
― Kim Harrison, A Fistful of Charms

“Landon paced back and forth, his eyes a little wild.
‘’Well, he took it worse than I did,’’ Curran said.
‘’I don’t see what the big deal is.‘’
‘’It’s a sword made out of your grandmothers bones, Kate.’’
I shrugged
Landon stared at me through the windshield, turned around, paced back and forth, and stared at me again”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Breaks

“Remember, it’s all fun and games until somebody loses an eyeball, and then it’s, “Hey! free eyeball!” —T-SHIRT”
― Darynda Jones, Sixth Grave on the Edge