THE NEGOTIATION Guide

HOW TO CLOSE MORE DEALS FASTER

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THE NEGOTIATION Guide
HOW TO CLOSE MORE DEALS FASTER

You can negotiate anything in life.

You probably negotiate something more times during the day than you even realize. For example,
how many times did you go back and forth with a friend over where to go for dinner? He wanted
Italian but you wanted Chinese. How did you solve where to go? You negotiated.

Maybe you won and you’re eating some delicious sesame chicken, or maybe you are packing on
the carbs. Either way, you took part in that active negotiation, and that deal closed.

BUT this is a guide about selling real estate and not deciding the best place to eat dinner, so I am
going to gear these tips specifically to negotiating a real estate deal. However, you really can (and
should) use these practices in all aspects of life.

Negotiating is a balancing act. It’s is an active discussion between two different sides in hopes to
achieve the results that are best for the overall outcome. It is a collaboration.

In this guide, I’ll start with some basic tips to understand how successful negotiations work in gen-
eral and how to effectively prepare for the best outcome. In any negotiation, you need to know the
other side’s underlying interests (which are rarely what they say they are outright) and some basic
numbers: first offer, best target, and your walkaway price. There are some other general principles
I’ll cover here, too.

After the basics, we’ll move into the psychology of negotiation. Over my real estate career, I’ve
noticed how certain words or actions trigger a response. Each response will teach me something
new about the other side which I can use next time.

In this section of the guide, we’ll cover my six detailed principles that work along with my five
personal techniques.

Read them, study them, but most of all, PRACTICE them. You’ll close better DEALS when you do.

Ryan

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 Part 01
NEGOTIATION BASICS

IF THERE ARE ONLY TWO THINGS TO REMEMBER, IT’S THESE:

1. You’re working for the DEAL
2. Focus on interests, not positions

2
YOU’RE WORKING FOR THE DEAL

I DON’T NEGOTIATE TO WIN.

I NEGOTIATE TO CLOSE A DEAL.

When I started in real estate, I had an image of me being becoming THE NEGOTIATOR, the
smooth talker who always convinced the other side to agree to everything my client wanted.

I quickly realized that’s the stereotype of the car salesman I talk about in my course. That’s not what
it means to be a good negotiator.

I always put my clients’ interests first as their fiduciary, but often helping my clients get what they
want also means helping the other side get what they want, too. We all want to get a deal closed.
We just need to do it in a way that works for both sides.

You should always be thinking of the other side when you’re negotiating. What are their interests
(I’ll get to what this means in a moment)? What are their stated limitations and their real limitations?
What’s truly non-negotiable for them? What’s going to help them get to a deal they feel good
about, too?

You also want to leave every negotiation with your reputation intact. Be ambitious in fighting for
your clients, but don’t become so ambitious that no one wants to work with you.

Bob Woolf, one of the most successful sports agents of all time, explains it this way:
“A successful negotiation isn’t one where I get everything and you get nothing…because
it’s possible to push the price so far, create such antagonism, that…it isn’t really worth it.
If someone feels you held them up, you’re going to take it out on you or your business…
your good reputation is incredibly important.”

There’s one other way to put this: Be hard on the problem, soft on the person. Find mutually
beneficial deals with the other side, but don’t become so greedy that you lose sight of the DEAL.

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FOCUS ON INTERESTS, NOT POSITIONS,
THEN FIND CREATIVE OPTIONS FOR
MUTUAL GAIN.

Imagine you and your spouse are planning your annual vacation. You’ve been dreaming of renting
a lake house in the Rocky Mountains but your spouse wants a beach vacation at an ocean-front
hotel in Miami. After a few wine-filled evenings of each of you trying to convince the other of the
merits of either plan over dinner, neither of you will budge. Each of you is thinking about the
benefits of your position, set on what you have in your mind.

Realizing you’re at an impasse, you both pull back out your vacation dream lists. Touring the
museums and monuments in Washington, D.C. is high on each of your lists. Even though you’re
planning the vacation for summer, a time that’s famously muggy in Washington, and a city
vacation isn’t anywhere close to what either of you had in mind this year, this vacation is a good
compromise. It’s high on both of your lists, and if neither of you can have your first choice, a
mutually-agreeable second choice is a good option.

But is it?

This type of second-choice compromise happens all too often in life and in real estate. It’s the
equivalent of “splitting the difference” or “meeting in the middle” if you can’t come to an
agreement on price. You’ll both lose something, so it feels fair. Though, what seems like fair isn’t
always the best outcome for a mutually-beneficial DEAL.

Let’s revisit the vacation decision for you and your spouse. The decision to go to Washington, D.C.
was a result of focusing on positions (the location you want) rather than interests (the goals of your
vacation). If you each made a list of your interests – why you want what you want – you would
have found you have a few things in common. Here are your interests that led you to choosing your
position in this negotiation:

POSITION: Lake house in the Rocky Mountains POSITION: Hotel on the beach in Miami

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 Your Interests Your Spouse’s Interests
• Mental escape from work and other people • Be in a place that has the energy of other
• Opportunity to “relax” people on vacation
• Cook for you and your spouse without time • Read a book on the beach, with the sound of
pressure the waves and feeling of sitting on the sand
• Fresh air • Go fishing on a fishing charter
• Ability to go for a long walk / hike in nature • Opportunity to “relax”

Now that you and your spouse have a list of your interests, you can compare what you have in
common and then find a creative solution for those interests you don’t have in common.

It turns out you both want to relax and want to be outside in fresh air (your spouse wants the fresh
air to be at the beach but you don’t have a specific preference for where you’ll be getting the fresh
air). Already off the bat, we can see a city vacation in Washington, D.C. isn’t a good fit for those
common interests.

You don’t want to stay at a hotel because you want to be able to enjoy cooking. Your spouse
doesn’t have “hotel” on her interest list, so you can agree to renting a house somewhere.
Next: Your spouse is adamant about being on the beach because of benefits she can only get from
the beach. And, she wants to go fishing, so that’s two strong preferences that suggest this vacation
will need to be somewhere with a beach and fishing nearby. You don’t need a forest or mountains
to meet any of your interests. In fact, you can go for a long walk or a hike somewhere near a
beach.

Now that you’ve narrowed down a mutually-beneficial vacation deal to include a rental home on
or near a beach, you have one more hurdle to overcome: How do you satisfy your interest in being
away from people while your spouse has an interest in being near people?

As it turns out, you can repeat this exercise of listing interests to go one step deeper. Make “Be
away from people” and “Be near people” into positions, and ask each other the interests behind
those positions.

POSITION: Be away from people on vacation POSITION: Be away from people on vacation
Your Interests Your Spouse’s Interests
• I find solace in the quiet sounds of nature • I work from home at my computer all day
• I am a real estate agent who interacts with and want to be around other people, even if
people all day every day and need a mental I don’t know them
break from being around other people • I want the opportunity to meet new people
• Having silence helps me think through • I get nervous being far from other people.
challenges in my business and come up with What if something happens and we need help?
creative solutions

There are a few creative ways to satisfy each of your interests, and the best solution will likely end
up being based on budget and how strongly either of you feel about these second-level interests:

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 • Rent a house on a private beach that’s in a neighborhood of other homes with private beaches
• Rent a house in a neighborhood near a beach that backs a forest/nature preserve. Spend the mornings
at the beach and the afternoons in the home’s backyard. Alternate nights going out and cooking at home.
Do a fishing trip one day of vacation and take a long hike through the nature preserve another day.
• Find a small, secluded beach resort with individual, full-featured cottages but also has a full-service
restaurant/staff/activities.

Any of these creative options will be much more satisfying than the “meet in the middle” option
of each of you picking your second choice vacation of touring Washington, D.C.So, how do we
apply this to a real estate negotiation?

The principle is the same, but stakes are higher, and the terms of the DEAL can be more
complicated.

Let’s imagine you’re trying to bridge the gap between a seller that won’t come down from $500K
and a buyer who can’t come up from $485K. Both have stated positions based on price. But,
could there be another, creative way to bridge the gap based on interests?

Here are a few interests that could be underlying the buyer’s position that he can’t come up in
price:

• Can’t secure a loan at a higher price

• Can’t pay the monthly mortgage at a higher loan amount
• Needs to factor in desired renovations, updates, or furniture purchases
• Hasn’t found a buyer for his current home and can’t pay the total of two mortgages if he comes up to
a higher loan amount
• Many, many more

And, here are a few interests that could be underlying the seller’s position that he can’t come
down in price:

• He needs the money to close on a new home

• He needs to sell the house at that price to use the money to pay for something else (medical bills,
aging parent, lawsuit, business investment, literally anything else)
• He’s not in a rush to sell and just wants to hit a certain number
• Many, many more

If you know the interests by asking why, you may be able to bridge the gap in a way that will give
both sides what they want and leave everyone feeling good about the deal.

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HOW TO PREPARE FOR ANY NEGOTIATION

Sometimes you can’t find a creative solution, and the negotiation really does come down to price.

Being prepared to negotiate on price is always important, but it becomes even more so when that’s
the only interest at play.

In real estate, price is all about comps. Finding the best comps to support your story is an art all of
us master with time. The Excel template we use on The Serhant Team is available under “Guides,
Downloads, and Resources” for course members, and it’s a great place to start. Ultimately, there is
no substitute for actually knowing each property in your neighborhood and the backstories that led
them to trade at their final price.

When you’re preparing to negotiate on price as the buyer or the seller, there are really three prices
you need to know:

1. Your first offer (if you’re a seller, this is the listing price)
2. Your best target (what you really hope to get – don’t share this number with the other side)
3. Your walkway price (the number you can’t go below if you’re the seller or the number you can’t
go above if you’re the buyer)

SETTING YOUR FIRST OFFER WHEN REPRESENTING A BUYER

In general, here’s a good rule of thumb for setting your first offer:

Try to find a comp that supports the offer your client wants to put in. Even if the offer is very low,
you should be able to find something (if you can’t, then the offer truly is way too low, and you
should set your client’s expectations that the offer will be rejected). You never want to put in an offer
that you will not get a response to, so you always need a REASON behind it. That will keep the
conversation going.

The seller’s agent will then use higher comps to back their first counter-offer, which you can share
with your client. They will do the work for you

If you are in a “BAD” market, try for 10%-20% less. If you are in an “OK” market, start at 5%-10%
less (depending on price point).

SETTING YOUR WALKAWAY PRICE

Before you negotiate, know the highest your buyer is willing to pay or the lowest your seller
is willing to accept.

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Many times, if you are representing a seller, your client might say “bring me offers” and won’t
articulate a walkaway price. I caution against this. The walkaway price helps keep emotion out of
your clients’ decision making. If they have a real walkway price, they’ll have a real benchmark for
accepting or not accepting what’s likely to be one of the most significant financial transactions of
their lives.

Once you set your first offer, best target, and walkaway price, it’s time to get to the actual back-
and-forth process of finding a mutually-satisfying deal that will close.

For that, I have Part 2: The Psychology of Negotiation.

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 Part 02
THE PSYCHOLOGY OF NEGOTIATION
In this part – the true nuts and bolts of negotiation – I’ll share my six
overarching negotiation principles that will help you close the deal and then five
techniques that will help you in specific scenarios.

9
SERHANT NEGOTIATION PRINCIPLES

PRINCIPLE #1: UNDERSTANDING YOUR “OPPONENT”

Any time I am about to negotiate a deal, I try to learn as much about the other side of the
transaction as I can. At a bare minimum, find their past sales and read their website/LinkedIn bio.
Then, when you meet, watch their body language, listen to how they talk, and gauge the tone of
their voice.

Are they looking to work together or be combative? Do they sound nervous or confident? Every
little signal will help you make a quick evaluation of who you’re actually going to be dealing with
in the negotiation. Then, you can strategize on the best approach to get to a close.

1. Do you need to feed into their ego?

Maybe the agent on the other side of the transaction has been in the business much longer than you
and automatically thinks she holds the upper hand. I have been in this position many times, and, trust me,
it’s not always easy to let the other person feel like they are right and in control when you know they are
not. I find whenever I am on the opposite side of someone with a huge ego, they ALWAYS want to feel like
they are “winning.” If that’s what you’re dealing with, agree with them throughout the process and “defer”
to their expertise.

This is as simple as asking questions like, “What would you do if you were in my position,” or, “How
would you tell my client that your client won’t come up?” By doing this, you are letting them share their
expertise AND letting them tell you exactly what they are thinking.

1. Are they new to the business and need guidance?

Dealing with someone who does not know what he is doing can be just as complicated as dealing with
someone who thinks she has all the experience in the world. When someone is new to selling, I’ve found I
don’t always know exactly what that agent is going to tell his client. Sometimes it can be the opposite of
what I said! The message can get lost in that game of telephone if the person doesn’t have the experience.

This is as simple as asking questions like, “What would you do if you were in my position,” or, “How
would you tell my client that your client won’t come up?” By doing this, you are letting them share their
expertise AND letting them tell you exactly what they are thinking.

The secret here is to make the inexperienced agent your best friend. Offer guidance without straight out
telling him what to do (you don’t want to be the egotistical agent in scenario #1 above!).

Use these key phrases:

- “We are in this together”
- “Let’s work together to figure this out”
- “We both want the same thing for our clients”
- “I’ve been in your situation before and this is what I did…”

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 By communicating as a friend, instead of an opponent, you build trust. Ultimately, you DO both want
the same things for your clients (to close the best deal possible) – but there are ways to help each other.
Typically, I like to write emails that I tell the other agent to be “welcome to forward” to their client. When I
do that, I know the message I want to convey can be properly relayed to the client. New agents typically
appreciate this.

Understanding the person on the other side is just as important as understanding the person they
are representing. In order to do this, you must ASK QUESTIONS.

People love to talk – let them. You will learn a lot more about the other side’s real
interests (remember Part 1?) if you LISTEN.

1. “Why does your seller feel it’s worth that much?”

2. “Why does the buyer need to delay a closing by 4 months?”
3. “How would your client feel if we started our offer at X?”
4. “Why does your buyer feel it is priced too high?”

Asking simple questions throughout the negotiation allows you to figure out the main interests be-
hind a position, allowing you to figure out a solution instead of being on the defense.

PRINCIPLE #2: ACKNOWLEDGE THEIR POINTS

Did anyone ever tell you that during an interview you should “mirror” the interviewer’s actions? If
they are leaning in while talking, you should lean in while talking. If they talk in a soft-spoken voice,
you should try to match their volume.

It is the same thing in sales. By emulating the other person, you are achieving one very important
goal: You are making them feel COMFORTABLE.

Here’s how to accomplish this:

Repeat their points back to them. Everyone wants to feel like they are making a good case for
their clients, and they want their points to be taken seriously. By doing this, you are showing you
are listening and understanding. You are showing EMPATHY. Many agents take this for granted
when dealing with a negotiation. They want to cut to the chase right away. I promise you will get a
lot further if you treat every negotiation as a discussion and not a confrontation.

From here, you are able to relate to them: “I understand you feel this way because of XYZ, so how
would you suggest we get to ABC?” By acknowledging their feelings and reasons for not giving
in to a certain sticking point on a deal, you are often able to get to the true interests behind the
positions and then find a creative solution.

PRINCIPLE #3: NEVER PUSH FOR A “YES”

When people tell you “yes,” sometimes it really means “no.” “Yes” is an easy way to get you off
the phone without having to experience the discomfort of “no.” So, what you really want is a “no.”

Let me explain how this works in sales.

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Getting to an agreement is your ultimate goal, right? If you asked anyone that, they would say yes.
However, it’s not that simple when you are trying to merge a gap on a deal. Everyone wants to be
right. Everyone wants to feel like they win. So, why would they openly agree with your suggestions,
ESPECIALLY if they want their client to think highly of them?

• Would it be terrible if you got your buyer up an additional $10K?

• If you asked them if their buyer would come up an additional $10K, they would probably say no.
But if you change the question, the default “no” gets you a step closer.
• Does your seller really want to lose a qualified buyer? ould it be terrible if you got your buyer up an
additional $10K?
• Do you really think the home is worth $100K more than the one that just sold down the block that is
a direct comp?

By asking questions that you are sure to get a ‘no’ from, you can work together to find a YES that
works for both sides. And, remember from earlier, negotiating is about coming to closing a DEAL
that is a happy YES for both sides.

PRINCIPLE #4: LET YOUR SILENCE DO THE TALKING

Getting to a point when a deal is accepted is all about finding a solution that satisfies both sides’
interests. What better way to do that than having the person on the other side come up with how
to do that?

By remaining silent you are doing two things:

1. Letting the other agent figure out the solution that you know they would accept
2. Letting the other agent feel like they have control of the situation

Let’s go to another story about negotiating on interests, not positions.

I was recently involved in a deal in which we were at a standstill over $50,000. Neither side
would budge. Instead of giving up, I remained persistent, with MANY phone conversations with the
other agent about how we could get this done so both sides are happy.

I represented the seller, and their real interest was that they would not take $50,000 less for their
apartment because they would then be taking a loss. So, instead of pushing the price over and
over again, I finally just asked the agent, “How am I supposed to get them to accept something
lower than what they paid?”

I made it the other agent’s job to figure it out. I stopped following up! (I know…crazy).
But – what’s a creative solution? It turns out the answer was some living room furniture – which
neither of us thought of up to that point. The buyers had an interest in the beautiful and well-propor-
tioned couch and two chairs! So, we got the price we wanted, and they got some amazing furni-
ture (which was defiantly NOT worth $50K, but the buyer and the seller valued these two interests
differently – EXACTLY what negotiation is about).

But guess what: If I had suggested the couch and chairs, they probably would have asked for more
furniture because they wanted to feel like they’re winning. So, instead, I stayed quiet and let them

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to me with a proposal I knew they’d accept because it was their proposal.

It was a happy solution for all

PRINCIPLE #5: KEEP IT POSITIVE

The second you lose control of your emotions, the deal is dead. I am serious. It is SUPER important
to remain calm and positive throughout the entire deal.

No one likes to negotiate when negative feelings are involved. The best deals get done when both
sides are happy. Not only will negativity hurt the relationship between you and the broker on the
other side of transaction, but also both clients will feel it, too.

Everything is always OK. We will always figure it out one way or another. We are in this together. I
am on your side. If it’s not these buyers, we will find someone else. I will never quit for you.

It is important to always maintain positivity during a deal. Without it, you have no deal.

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SERHANT NEGOTIATION TECHNIQUES

Below are five specific techniques I discovered over my career so far.

Nothing is guaranteed in real estate, and nothing I say below will ensure the result you want.
But, deployed correctly, these techniques can help you and your client get the best deal possible.

TECHNIQUE #1: “THE PULL”

Sometimes, when a negotiation is really dragging on and your side seems to want the deal to
happen more than the other side, there may be only one thing to do: Pull the deal away.

This is not a fool-proof plan. It is RISKY. You COULD all lose the entire deal. Your client needs to
fully understand these risks before you decide together to do this.

If we are really at a standstill and my client and I agree together this is the right move, here’s
what I’ll do:

I’ll tell the other side, “Thank you so much for working with me and getting us this far. I truly
appreciate all of your hard work to try to get this done. Unfortunately, it is just not going to work
out this time. Good luck!”

Either the other side realizes they want the deal more than they thought they did and they come
back or they don’t. Typically, at this point, you have nothing to lose anyway. This has worked more
for me more often than it hasn’t.

TECHNIQUE #2: “THE FACTS”

This technique is purely analytical. It can work to get your client to understand the market or help
the other side realize that they are far off. In order to show the facts, you must know the facts. And
it’s really that simple.

PULL THE COMPS. Do the work.

Here’s what you say: These are the facts. Here are the comps. This is our justification.

It’s hard to argue with that. If you don’t have the facts, it’s hard to have a good deal.

TECHNIQUE #3: “THE ‘WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?’”

Sometimes after an intense negotiation, you will start to feel like you have to push your client one
way or another. You’re the expert, right? And everyone likes to be told what to do.

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I only fight for a deal on the table if I BELIEVE in the deal. This means that if I honestly think it is way
too low, I would NEVER advise my seller to accept it. In the same way, I’d never advise my buyer
to accept a deal if I think they’re overpaying.

But if I believe it is a GOOD deal, I will do my job and advise my clients to the best of my ability.

At the end of the day, though, it is not my home. It is not my money. It is not my life about to change.

So, I’ll ask my client: What do you want to do?

This puts the decision purely in their hands. It gives them the control to be the ones to make the
decision.

TECHNIQUE #4: “THE EMOTIONS”

Sometimes you are SO close to a deal but you are also SO CLOSE to losing it.

When it is that close, it only comes down to one thing: Emotions.

This is exactly why it’s important to set a walkaway price before you start a negotiation.
I was once in a bidding war representing a buyer. We ended up paying well OVER the asking
price to get the apartment my buyer loved. For him and for anyone in this position, this is an emo-
tional decision.

This is where you should pause, compare your walkaway price to where you are in the negotiation,
and question what’s really driving the deal price up so high. When we pause to talk about it, it
becomes a “would you rather” question.

For some buyers, when they compare their walkaway price to the deal, they’ll realize they got
wrapped up in the emotion of “winning” the negotiation at the expense of their true financial goals,
and they’ll decide to walk away.

But, for other buyers, when comparing their walkaway price to the deal at hand, they’ll recognize
that they weren’t so confident in their walkaway price to begin with. Perhaps they didn’t include
how they would feel about their kids growing up in that house in their walkaway price, and now
that they’ve seen this house – and they can truly afford it – they’d rather keep the bidding war
going because “winning” the negotiation here actually means getting a true DREAM home.
If this is the case, you can lean into the emotion to show how, although you’re $10K over the walk-
away, $10K over 10 years in the home is really only $1,000 a year. And, for some, that might be
worth it.

The key here is to help your client through the emotional process, and everyone likes to win.
Recognize the impact emotions have on the decision-making process. Use that to help your client
make the best decision.

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TECHNIQUE #5: “THE REALITY”
This is what it is. This is where we are. This is what the market is saying. The end.

Sometimes the truth hurts. The reality is our truth. We don’t control the market, and we don’t set
the values. We can only do what we can to get you a number you are happy with.

This is the HARDEST technique to master. Sometimes you have to tell someone that the home they
lived in for 20 years, and the home they built a family in, is just not worth what they think it is given
the comps and the market.

No one likes to hear this, and I never like to say it. But the best agents tell the truth. And, if you are
stuck in a negotiation where the deal at hand is market value, sometimes you have to say it.

I wish I had a crystal ball and could predict what next year would bring us for your home, but I
don’t. It could be more, it could be less. But right now, today – this is what we can get.

This is the reality.

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Always Remember
1. SET YOUR CLIENTS’ EXPECTATIONS FROM THE START
If you are representing the buyer, make sure to call the seller’s agent to get a sense of how
many offers they have received, how motivated the other side is, and other factors, so you
can inform your client from the start.

If you are representing the seller and receive a low or a high offer, call the other broker
before presenting and talk through their thought process on the offer. Find the interest behind
the position. This way, when you present the offer to your seller, you have a full understanding
of the reasoning behind it.

2. COMMUNICATION IS KEY
Negotiating is the same thing as managing a relationship. The more open you are with the
person you are representing, the more they will trust you. Sometimes things don’t go as
planned, but if you are communicating everything from the start, you’ll have a better
working relationship.

3. ALWAYS KNOW THE FACTS

Whether representing a buyer or seller, you MUST know the comps. You need to take the
time, do the work, and educate yourself on recent homes that closed and that are on the
market. Trust me, it will make you a better agent all around, but will always help in any
negotiation.

4. FIND SOLUTIONS NOT PROBLEMS

Every deal will have its own set of issues that arise. People will get frustrated, and you will
be blamed. The key is to work to come up with a solution and not let one setback kill a deal.
Always keep everyone calm and stay positive. Work with the other side or your client to
come up with a solution that works.

5. TAKE EMOTIONS OUT OF IT

It’s easy to get wrapped up in a deal emotionally. But you need to be the one that stays
professional and keeps the boat afloat. Clients are allowed to be the ones that are
emotional because it is THEIR money and THEIR home.

17
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I have negotiated thousands of deals personally. My team as a whole – the best team at
negotiating real estate by far – has negotiated tens of thousands of deals.

If there’s one more thing I can tell you, it’s that every single deal is different. It is never easy.
And, if it is, then SAVOR it. That is not normal, and you should not get used to it.

All the principles above apply whether you’re negotiating a $400,000 deal or a $5,000,000
deal, just like my core sales techniques apply no matter what you sell. It’s all humans selling to
and negotiating with other humans.

Next time you find yourself in a negotiation, keep in mind the basics I shared in Part 1, my six
principles, and my five techniques. You now have this guide, and you can refer to it at any time.

Then, when you get stuck, ask for help in the Sell It Like Serhant membership community on
Facebook. My team and I are there PLUS the thousands of other agents who have joined.

Deal?

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