Writing Theory Booklet 4

RECOUNTS (2 )
UNIT SIXTEEN
.
Here are some more recounts to try
• My School camp.
• My Most Enjoyable Excursion.
• My Least Enjoyable Excursion.
• My First Trip Interstate.
• My First Trip Overseas.
• A Visit to Remember.
• The First Day of School.
e First Time I ... (played tennis, had a violin lesson, etc)

• Th
• A Time I Became Lost.

.
• The First Time I Spoke in Public
• My Best Birthday.
• I Succeeded... Finally!
• A Really Happy Day.
• When I Went To Hospital.
• When I Won a Prize.

etc)
• A Visit to the ...(Museum, Zoo,
• When I Surprised Myself.
• A Wonderful Holiday.
36 © Rve Senses Education Pty Ltd

1. This is part of a vety badly written recount Rewrite it
and change it in these ways:
• Use better 'time phrases~

• Make sure all the verbs are in past tense.
• Combine sentences using conjunctions.
■ Use better words.
Our class went to the Science Museum for an excursion. Our class
went on Friday. We went by bus. The bus trip took an hour.
When we got to the Museum we sat on the lawns. Then we ate
our recess. We went into the museum. Mrs Ford put us in
groups. Then the groups go to different places. The parent
helpers go with different groups. The parents were Mrs Lewis, Mrs
Chen, Mrs Hussein and Mr White. Then my group went to the
Discovery Floor. We tried all the different machines such as the
one that shows about centrifugal force. After we went to the
Theatre and we saw a film about earthquakes. Then we went on
the earthquake simulator. Jason said it makes him sick so then he
tried to get off. Then Mr White told him to sit down.
37
Top Skills - Writing
UNIT SEVENTEEN~~~------- EDITING (2)
.::.:..:!.!~~ ---~:.!...__
1. Mark all the mistakes in th!s passage, and the? Write it
out again. Look for mistakes ,n grammar, spe/1,ng and
punctuation.
Lucy was anoyed with her sister anna. anna has borrowed her
new top without asking and loses it. Anna did'nt even appologise
and just said to Lucy You have lots of tops but I havn't much tops
lucy h_as shouted at Anna than and has tore up her history project:
She did not speaked to Anna after this, but Anna don't seem to
care. There mother was upset with both of the girls and is giving
them extra chores to show her disspleasure. She thort they
should be ashamed of theirselves. Anna just sayed that she hadn't
done nothing wrong.
38 © Ave Senses Education Pty Ltd

-
Have you been in a situation where you have damaged
someone else's possession? Have you had a possession
ruined by someone else? Write a recount of it
Top Skills - Writing 39

ADJECTIVES(~
UNIT EIGHTEEN
1. Select a good adjedive to complete each sentence.
foolish cheerfu
immature considerate a .
disres ectful shocked
de'ected u
trustworth deceitful
hostile
a. Alan's manner always put me in a good mood.

-----
b. To win the National Spelling Bee was an _ _ _ _ _ feat.
c. We could see it was bad news from the _ _ _ _ __
faces of our parents.
d. Molly's soccer team was ___ __ after losing the Final.
e. A good employee must be hard-working and _ _ _....;..__
f. The salesperson was _ _ _ _ _ in her manner, and so
Grandma made a complaint.
g. It is - - - - - to leave your work until the last minute.
h. We hurried quickly past the _ _ _ _ _ _ dog next door.
i. · Lucy is always ------ a.--- of the needs of others.

j. That boy is much too - - - - - - to be a good prefect.
k. Samantha's - - - - - manner earned her a detention.
I. A friend should never be

--- ---
40 © Rve Senses Education PlY Ltd

2. Sometimes young writers use too many adjectives. A
few, we/I-chosen ones are best
• Rewrite this paragraph, taking out some of the

adjectives.
• You may combine sentences, or make any other
improvements you wish.
Sunday was a cold, blustery, miserable, freezing day. Max

slumped in his hard, old, blue chair, staring at his computer. He
felt ill, sick, upset and grumpy. His forehead was warm, hot and
sweaty when he touched it. His throat was tight, sore and painful.
He had a dreadful, sharp, severe headache. When he tried to
concentrate on his interesting game, his vision was blurry and
fuzzy. Finally, he gave up trying to play. He fell onto his snug,
comfortable bed. He wrapped himself in his warm, cozy doona.
After a while, he drifted off into a restless, unsettled, jumpy sleep
full of horrible, frightening nightmares.
Top Skills - Writing 41

VERBS(~
UNIT NINETEEN
1. Verbs must agree with their subjects. ~ singular
subject needs a singular verb, and a plural subJect neec1s
a plural verb.
• Choose the correct verb in each set ofbrackets.
a. The team of soccer players (has/ have) eaten all the food.
b. My friends, Joe and Alice, (hope I hopes) to visit us this week.
c. The huge, green troll (devour I devours) a great deal of meat.
d. Each of the girls (train I trains) for three hours a day.
. e. Isaac, a friend of Luke, (was/ were) involved in the trouble.
f. Either Esther or Selina (learn I learns) Ital·1an on 5aturdays.
. nce.
g. The antics of the clown (has/ have) capt·1vated the audie
42 © Rve Senses Education Pty Ltd

- 2. There ar e a nu m be r of mistakes wi th th e ve rb s in this
story. They m ay be in the wron
g tense, or they m ay no t
ag re e with th ei r subjects.
wr ite th e passage, co rre cti ng al l the mistakes.

• Re
te one au tum n ev en ing , a yo ung girl was walking to a well

La
village, wh en she se em s to hear a bell ringing. This
outside her
t he r so mu ch tha t she slippe d in the mud near the well, and
upse
again, she finds that everything
fell down. When she has stood up
r ha d ch an ge d. Th ere wa s no familiar trees or rocks and
around he
d. Night has fell. Some distance
the well has completely vanishe
fire bla ze d an d ab ou t it pe op le are dancing. Looking
away, a
people are small, only about a
closely, she realised that all the
h. The gro up stop da nc ing and were regarding her
meter hig
e felt very anxious.
curiously. Nobody greets her. Sh
43
O....,,;;;C:;..::E:.:D~U~Rs;~
· P___R___
!:!U.llNll.lTLJTW:J!,IE~N[ITYL-~----------
uen ce, that they describe

1. Arr ang e thes e step s in seq so_
the pro ced ure for making a sausage pie.
[ ] Slice up the sausages and arrange on the bott om sheet of

pastry.
[ ] Beat four eggs together with salt and pepper. Pour gently
ove r the sausages in the dish.

.,
[1] Put six sausages in a pan and pour boiling wat er over _them
Leave until cool.
[ ] Cut a 375g roll of puff pastry in half. Roll half out and line a
square pie dish with it.
[ ] Seal the edges of the pastry well. Prick the top with a fork.
e
[ ] Bake the pie at 190 degrees Celsius for 45 minutes. Serv
hot or cold.
[ ] Roll out the rest of the pastry to make a lid for the pie.
Place over the sausages.
[ ] When they are cool, carefully peel the skin from the
sausages.
[ ] The pie may be accompanied by a green salad.
44 © Five Senses Education PtY Ltd

Write a proce dure for one of the following.
■ Cleaning up your room.

■ Making a kite.
■ Sending an email.
■ Cleaning muddy soccer boots.
.oon't forget:
- An aim.
- A list of tools.
- Numbered steps in sequence.
45

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RECOUNTS (2 )

• My Most Enjoyable Excursion.

• My Least Enjoyable Excursion.

• My First Trip Interstate.

• My First Trip Overseas.

• The First Day of School.

e First Time I ... (played tennis, had a violin lesson, etc)

• A Time I Became Lost.

• A Really Happy Day.

• When I Went To Hospital.

• When I Won a Prize.

• When I Surprised Myself.

36 © Rve Senses Education Pty Ltd

• Use better 'time phrases~

38 © Ave Senses Education Pty Ltd

Top Skills - Writing 39

a. Alan's manner always put me in a good mood.

c. We could see it was bad news from the _ _ _ _ __

faces of our parents.

d. Molly's soccer team was ___ __ after losing the Final.

e. A good employee must be hard-working and _ _ _....;..__

f. The salesperson was _ _ _ _ _ in her manner, and so

Grandma made a complaint.

g. It is - - - - - to leave your work until the last minute.

h. We hurried quickly past the _ _ _ _ _ _ dog next door.

i. · Lucy is always ------ a.--- of the needs of others.

k. Samantha's - - - - - manner earned her a detention.

I. A friend should never be

40 © Rve Senses Education PlY Ltd

• Rewrite this paragraph, taking out some of the

Sunday was a cold, blustery, miserable, freezing day. Max

Top Skills - Writing 41

b. My friends, Joe and Alice, (hope I hopes) to visit us this week.

c. The huge, green troll (devour I devours) a great deal of meat.

d. Each of the girls (train I trains) for three hours a day.

. e. Isaac, a friend of Luke, (was/ were) involved in the trouble.

f. Either Esther or Selina (learn I learns) Ital·1an on 5aturdays.

42 © Rve Senses Education Pty Ltd

wr ite th e passage, co rre cti ng al l the mistakes.

te one au tum n ev en ing , a yo ung girl was walking to a well

uen ce, that they describe

[ ] Slice up the sausages and arrange on the bott om sheet of

ove r the sausages in the dish.

Leave until cool.

square pie dish with it.

Place over the sausages.

[ ] The pie may be accompanied by a green salad.

44 © Five Senses Education PtY Ltd

■ Cleaning up your room.

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d. Molly's soccer team was _ after losing the Final.